All language subtitles for Designing.Women.1993.S01E08.1080p.DSNP.WEB-DL.H264.AAC-PTerWEB_track3_[eng]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

How many
of those pictures are you gonna cut up?

As many as it takes

to communicate with
these upholsterers.

They don't speak
a word of English.

You can only
say so much with your hands.

For example,
this morning,

I was trying
to explain...

Tuft.

Now the nephew
thinks

I want
larger breasts.

I don't.

Well, if it isn't
Imelda Marcos.

My, we outdid
ourselves today.

Can you believe
that poor woman?

Who?
Imelda.

All that money,
all those 1000's of shoes and dresses.

She still land up
with a big bun on her head,

looking like
a high school prom chaperon.

Did you find
a dress for tonight?

Yeah. I think so.

Julia, look.

Reese
sent roses.

Oh, that man!
He's got to stop.

I know. It's only
a six-month anniversary.

I always say
I don't deserve him,

But nobody else
does, either,

So I may as well
have him myself.

What incredibly
wonderful place is he taking you to?

I don't know.

He's being mysterious
about a lot of things,

Including
a special gift for me,

which he will only
say is yellow

and I can hold it
on one finger.

You're kidding.
Yellow must mean gold.

He's giving you
an engagement ring.

Don't say that.
What would you say if it is?

I don't know.

It would be nice
to be asked, I suppose.

I'm not ready
to get married again yet.

That's good. I don't
think you'll get asked.

Suzanne!
Suzanne!

Well, I'm just
being realistic.

Come on, all the women
at the country club

are hot to trot
for Reese Watson.

Mary-Alice just died
two years ago.

Now why would he
want to tie himself down again?

Well, he wouldn't,
Suzanne,

without sufficient
motivation.

However, I assure you

that if I wanted
to motivate him,

I could do so
a lot sooner

than you can jump the
next unsuspecting man from behind.

I bet
if there's a ring,

he'll hide it in something,
it's what everybody does now.

They hide it in flowers,
or under a plate, or inside a napkin.

You're joking.

Whatever happened to just
an old-fashioned box?

That's boring.
Nobody does that anymore.

How did Ted
give you yours?

I didn't get a ring.

I got
a gift certificate.

I'll never forget my friend
Brenda Barker, she got hers

inside a piece of cake,

Only she didn't know it

till she started
choking on it so bad they had to take her

to the emergency room.

Her fiancé Donald
got so mad

after they pumped up
a $65 dinner,

he took the ring back,
and they eventually married other people.

Great story.
You'll want to save that

in case you're ever
on the Tonight show.

Please, let's stop
talking about this ring business.

I'm not getting
a ring.

I wish you'd never
brought it up.

I don't know,
Julia.

Yellow,
fits on one finger.

What else
could it be?

One of those
little plastic bananas on a key chain.

You know,
I can hardly believe

that we've been
going out together

for six months
today.

Happy anniversary,
darling.

Now, I just want
to tell you something

so we can settle back
and enjoy the rest of the evening,

but you have
to promise me

you won't get mad.

Mad?

Reese, why on earth

would I get mad
at you tonight?

Well, I don't know,
but you could.

Don't be silly.
Go ahead, try me.

All right.

Darling,

You've made a mistake
with your hair.

Thank you,
thank you.

Bon appetit.

I like this guy.

Have you noticed

how all the waiters now
have to have a relationship with you?

I mean,
they got to tell you

their name is Greg
or Bob or Bill,

and just when you've got
a mouthful,

they're wanting to know
how's that swordfish.

I like a guy who serves
the food and gets out.

What do you mean,
a mistake with my hair?

Well,

I mean it doesn't
flatter you.

Your features
are angular,

and with your hair up,

It just brings
all that forward.

Not that you aren't
still perfectly lovely.

I see.

I didn't realize

my face was coming on
too strong for you.

I had no idea it was
so overwhelming,

or I would've worn
a bag over my head.

Here you go.
Now you're mad.

A rose for madame.

No, I'm not mad.

I appreciate
your telling me.

Why,
without your input,

Who knows
how many people

I might have
offended tonight

just by
looking at them?

I was just trying

to give you
a little tip there,

you don't have
to get mad and burn down the restaurant.

Are you looking
for something?

Just
a nervous habit.

Darling,
you don't need me

to tell you
you're gorgeous.

You know it. Everybody
knows you know it.

It's written all over
that cocky little walk.

Still, it's nice
to be told.

All right.

You're gorgeous.

Don't you think
she's gorgeous?

Oui, monsieur.

I like this guy.

He's right on top
of things.

Maybe you two can
get together later

and have drinks
in the piano bar.

Hey, let's not fight.

This
is our anniversary.

I want to tell you,

these past six months
have been

among the finest
of my life.

I also want to say

I've represented
guys on death row

who took less interest
in their food.

[LAUGHING]

Well...

This was
a wonderful dinner.

Now what?

Don't you want
to tear open this last roll?

There might be
something in it.

Don't be silly.

I wasn't looking
for anything.

I was just hungry.

I noticed.

[CHUCKLES] I guess
I'd better get on with this gift business

Before they roll you
out of here on a gurney.

Okay, now.

First you have
to close your eyes.

They're closed.

All right.

Now open them.

[CHIRPING]

Well?

What do you think?

[CHUCKLES]
A bird?

This is
what you were giving me

that's yellow
and fits on one finger.

Yeah.

Do you like him?

Oh, yes.

Very much.

He's a fine bird.

You're disappointed.

No, I'm not.

Oh, gosh, I thought my clues
were too on the nose.

No, you shouldn't
have worried.

I could never
have guessed,

Not in a million years,

Not even if Jeanne Dixon
and the Amazing Kreskin were working with me

around the clock.

Well, hell, I could have
got you a fur coat or a car.

What would be the point

When you could get me
a bird like this?

You may take him
away now.

We'll pick him up
on the way out.

Oui, madame.

Bon appetit.

You don't know why
I got him, do you? No.

Julie, don't you remember
telling me

how you lost
your pet canary

when you were little
girl

and how it almost
killed you

because it sang
so beautifully

and it was the first pet
you ever loved?

I remember
having a canary,

but I don't remember
being that overwrought.

Come on, you were
sitting right in front of my fireplace

when you told me.
It must have been Mary-Alice.

With tears streaming
down your face.

I must have been
kidding.

You know how
dramatic I can be.

Or maybe I was upset
about something else.

I do that sometimes
when I don't want to talk about

what I'm really upset about
then I just blame it

on something trivial.

Not that this bird
is trivial.

This is truly a...

A fine... bird.

Hogwash.
You got a face

longer
than our bar bill.

And it is yellow,

and it does fit
on one finger.

Well, I can't
believe it.

I mean, how could I
be so dense?

You were expecting
a ring, weren't you?

A ring?

No.
Don't be ridiculous.

You can't fool me,
kiddo.

You crushed six rolls
tonight

and had an ice bucket
up to your elbow.

You were mining
for diamonds...

And you know it.

Reese, look into my eyes
and read my lips.

I was not
expecting a ring.

Well, I'll be hornswoggled.
I'm just going to sit right back here

and bust my buttons.

I am flattered.

An old, ugly bear
like me

and a beautiful girl
like you.

This is your
little fantasy, not mine.

You bet it is.

And maybe it's time
we did something about it.

What do you mean?

Marry me. I said
marry me. What?

Forget the ring.
We don't need it.

We'll get a house

and raise the bird
together.

I think your champagne
just kicked into overdrive.

What the heck.
Why not?

I'm a man,
you're a woman.

I rest my case.

Reese,
my precious one,

we cannot
get married.

Why not?

Because it's nuts.

Everybody else
does it...

People not half as nice
and responsible

as you and me.

Anyway,
think of the money we could collect.

What money?

Well, for some
strange reason,

there's a lot
of betting pools being put together,

speculating on the odds

against anyone getting me
down the aisle again.

[LAUGHS]

I myself abhor
this practice, but...

Between all the secretaries
at the office

and a good number
of the Atlanta Bar association,

we could be in
for three or four grand.

You romantic dog,
you.

Also...

You're the first woman

who hasn't made me
feel lonely

Since Mary-Alice died.

You're the first man
who's argued with me

since Hayden.

What are you
smiling about?

Nothing.

I was just wondering
if...

They might be
up in heaven

Having dinner
together tonight.

Well if they are,
I hope they're having as good a time

as you and me.

Do you think
they wish us well?

Sure.

Heck, they love us,
don't they?

What do you say?

I say...

You're going to have
a hard time

slipping that bird
on my finger.

WOMAN: Julia!

You look awful.
What happened to you?

I look awful
because I feel awful,

and I feel awful
because last night

Reese Watson and I drank

all the champagne
in Georgia.

Then we got married.

You got what?

Married.

You know,
husband and wife,

Bride and groom,

Ball and chain.

Julia.

I don't
believe it.

He did give you
a ring.

No, actually,
he gave me the bird.

But we got married,
anyway.

Well, gee.

This is such
a surprise.

We would have liked
to have given you a shower.

Thank you.
I just had a shower.

Well then, let me give you
a party at the club.

Are you
out of your mind?

I'm not
staying married.

Why ever not?

Because, Suzanne,
unlike you,

I don't do these things

every time
the light turns green.

Anyway,
if it weren't for you,

I wouldn't be
in this mess in the first place.

Me? What did I do?

You practically
dared me.

You said I couldn't
have Reese

even if I wanted him.

You know
I can't pass up a remark like that.

At least you'll
get some money out of it.

What are you
talking about?

Alimony.
Reese owes you.

After all, you gave
him the finest hours of your life.

I don't want
alimony.

I want out!

We were intoxicated.

I am a widow.
He's a widower.

We're still in
mourning.

Julia,
how is Reese going to feel

about getting
unmarried?

He will be devastated.

He was so happy
last night.

Now the next time
he walks through that door,

I'm gonna have
to take his heart

and shatter it
into a million pieces.

[CHUCKLES]

Good morning, ladies.

How's my bride?

I trust you all
have heard the news

of our
recent nuptials.

Yeah.

Congratulations.

Should we celebrate
with some... Sanka?

I'll have some. Black.

Well, darling, we really
tied one on, didn't we?

Yes, I guess
you could say tha-at.

Boy, when I woke up
this morning,

I couldn't believe
what we'd gone and done.

Would that
someone had tried to put us asunder.

But don't worry,
darling.

I'm tying up
all the loose ends.

Just sign here
on the dotted line.

What dotted line?
What is that?

Annulment papers.

Annulment papers?

Now, darling, you know
how I feel about you,

but we shouldn't
have to suffer

the rest of our lives

For one careless,
stupid, drunken blunder.

Why, you old
sweet-talker, you.

Julia,
don't get on me here.

You know exactly
what I'm trying to say.

I understand.

He's saying
he likes you.

He just doesn't want
to be married to you.

Yes, I got that.

There's nothing wrong
with my hearing,

Just my judgment in men.

Careful, darling.

And I want to thank you
for your kindness and sensitivity

in exposing this
obviously private moment

to family and friends.

I shall be happy to sign
your annulment papers,

Reese Watson.

I hereby annul you
and this entire relationship.

Now you may
take your annulment,

fold it in five corners,

and put it
where the sun don't shine.

Julia, I wish you'd
try some of this.

You haven't eaten
anything in two days.

I'm not hungry.

We brought you
some magazines.

Cosmopolitan.

Great.

It always cheers me

to see a woman
with nothing on

but suspenders
from the waist up.

Here.
You can shred those

for the bottom
of his cage.

What'd you name
him anyway?

Nothing.

Julia, that's terrible.
Everything should have a name.

Charlene, I'm not
in the mood.

If he applies
for a passport or driver's license,

I'll take care of it,
okay?

Well, I know,
but you can't let him go through life

without any identity
at all, that's just not right.

I had a cat once,
and...

All right, all right.
You can call him Tweety.

Tweety it is.

Well,
if you ask me,

I think you should
call up Reese,

Forget
the humiliation

of only being married
for 15 minutes,

and get on with
the rest of your life.

Julie, you said
yourself

that you didn't want
to be married.

I said it
and I meant it.

Reese doesn't have
to marry me,

but he sure as hell
ought to want to be married to me.

Well, now, Julia,
that's selfish and small-minded.

That's who I am.

You are not
those things.

Yes, I am!

I have to have my way!

It's a chromosomal defect

among the women
in our family.

It is not.

It is, too.

You're like that,
mother's like that.

All the Sugarbaker women
are like that.

Look, the truth of this
whole thing is

if we
hadn't been there the other morning,

you would have
signed those papers in a minute

and not give it
another thought.

You're
just embarrassed.

And that's silly
'cause we're your friends.

That's right.
You can't just lie up here forever.

Why not?

Because your muscles
will sag.

You'll get
poor circulation

and facial hair.

You know,
that reminds me.

I want you all
to promise me if I'm ever paralyzed

or lying
in a hospital bed

unable to move
my arms,

that you'll be there
with tweezers.

If you'll
do the same for me.

I don't have facial hair.

I hate to break up
a panel discussion

on a topic
of this importance,

but it is time
for my soap opera.

And I want to see
if Frank and Kim

are going to get the loan
on their discotheque.

All right.
We can take a hint.

You sure you don't want
anything to eat?

I'm sure.

Okay.

Well, if you change
your mind, you just call.

All right.

Oh, I just hate it
that Julia's so depressed.

I've never seen her like this.

I mean,
she's usually so on top of it,

so, in command.

This must be what it's like at
Crossler

when Lia Coco has the flu.

Julia, there's a telegram
here for you.

We haven't opened it,
but we can just smell it's from Reese.

Now I've been
up those stairs for the last time.

If you want it,
come and get it.

Is that true?
Did she get a telegram?

In a manner of speaking.

If there's one thing
Julia can't resist,

it's a man admitting
he was wrong.

Hmm, well she seems to be
resisting pretty well so far.

Reese, what are you
doing here?

I'm here
for the wedding.

W-w-w-what
wedding?

Julia's and mine.

This is Reverend
Gilbert.

He'll be doing
the honors today.

Are you serious?

You--you're actually
gonna get married again?

Right here
in the middle of the store?

We certainly are.

Unless you think it might impede
the flow of business.

I know you.
You look so familiar.

Have you ever been to Wimbledon?

No.

Where is she
anyway?

I'm right here.

And I'd like to know

just what in the Sam hill
you think you're doing.

Come down these stairs.
I want to talk to you.

Don't order me around.

Julia, either you come
down these stairs,

or I'll come up
and get you.

This is good.

All right. I'm coming,

But only to get something
I left in my desk.

What do you need?

A rubber band.

One of the little seats

fell off Tweety's
Ferris wheel.

[PLAYING WEDDING MARCH]

If you care
anything at all

about
your instrument,

you will stop.

[MUSIC STOPS]

I know.

Have you ever been
on Evelyn Jarbo's party barge?

No. I don't think so.

I recognize the name.

Tall, lots of make-up,
always has her dog with her.

What are you
doing here?

I got your telegram.

My telegram?

Yes, your telegram.

And I decided
if you can be that big

about the way
I've behaved,

Well, I can be bigger.

What telegram? I didn't
send a telegram.

Suzanne just told me
you sent me one.

And let me
be the first

to congratulate
both of you.

Suzanne!

Oh, all right.

I admit I did it

just to get you
back together again.

I mean I had no idea
he was gonna show up with a minister.

You people
are so extreme.

Look,

it doesn't matter
who sent what to whom.

This time,
I want this thing to be done right,

and with dignity.

Put this deal
on your head.

And this time,
try to be quiet.

Reese, this is
a very sweet gesture, but...

This is no gesture.

This is a bona-fide
wedding,

this is what you wanted

and I don't want
to hear any more about it.

Reverend, now could
we please just try

to muster up
a little dignity here?

Have you been
drinking again?

That is not
a dignified question.

Dearly beloved...

Stop.

I can't marry you.

Are you
turning me down?

Well, I have to.
I'm just not ready yet,

but I adore
your doing this.

You're sure this
is what you want?

I'm sure I've never
loved you more.

I've been acting
like an idiot,

and all the time
I've known

that you're
the only man for me,

married or annulled.

Come here.

This is so romantic.

It's just like Rhett
and Scarlett.

Ladies,
you're my witnesses.

Let the record show
she turned me down.

That's right.
We saw it in person.

And I'm a notary
public.

All right.
I've got an official rejection here,

and Charlene's going
to notarize it.

Reverend, you and I
just got the shaft.

Sorry about that.

No problem.
These things happen all the time.

You'll know
when it's right.

Maybe next time,
you can get the complete outfit.

Thank you,
Reverend.

And now,
if my almost bride would allow me,

I would like to
take you to lunch.

I would love to,

just let me
slip into something.

Okay I'll get rid
of these fellas.

Oh. Oh, and, Reese,
one more thing.

In the future,

when you hire
a minister to fool me,

don't use the
parking attendant

at the country club.

I knew you wouldn't
go through with it.

Next time,
don't press your luck.

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]