Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

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CZECH TELEVISION

THE CZECH FILM FUND FOR SUPPORT AND DEVELOPMENT OF CZECH FILMS

Starring

If no progress is made today, I'm quitting. Seriously. And we're moving.

- It'll be ok. You'll see. It's all set. - Are you sure?

Roubickova promised to try to process it.

- Did you give her the wine? -Yea. - The expensive one? - In the bottle.

- Good. -Today is the meeting! - Stop it. Get out of the building.

They're probably about finished.

The Zahradka's still aren't here.

- Hello. - Hello. -Come on.

It's all yours. You can come in. I'm leaving the windows open to air out.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

- Hello. - Hello...

OWNERS

That's where the Cicman's sit, so probably just sit here.

Hurry, hurry, hurry!

Shit, we're late again. You have to set the clock another 10 minutes fast. Hurry!

Fine, I can, but that'll make it an hour fast. Hurry up, boys.

Sorry, but aren't we supposed to start at five?

- I guess their babysitter came late again. - Boys, be good, be good.

- We're sorry. The babysitter was late. - Hello. No problem.

- We're in the wrong seats, aren't we? - Yea, it's ok, we'll sit in the Cicmans.

We brought something to snack on so it goes by a bit quicker.

Here we are.

Voila.

Help yourselves.

Homemade. Sugar free.

Wheat and gluten-free.

So what is there in it?

The normal ingredients and a teaspoon of cocoa,

but I brought sugar if anyone would like to sweeten it.

- Sugar is white poison. - It is.

- So, I'll have a taste if I may. - Great.

Hello, I'm glad you could all make it because this meeting is really important.

We'll discuss some very important issues.

First, we'll do a roll call to see if we've reached a quorum,

but I can see we are practically all here.

We can see it, but I'd rather have it on paper.

- Of course. It's being passed around. - On it.

The Cicmans are on a trip they'd already paid for.

- I've got their power of attorney. - May I see it? -They're always somewhere.

- Where's the money coming from. - No, not those. These.

I'd also like to welcome our new neighbors. The newlyweds, the Bernaseks.

Welcome.

- It's already been sold? - About a month ago. -They were fast.

We haven't had the time to go around and introduce ourselves to everyone

so at least here we can say hello to everyone.

- Hello. - Hello. -Hello.

We also have a few interesting ideas. Like doing something with the courtyard.

Nothing difficult. Trim the bushes a bit. Make it secluded. With a bench.

A small pond. A grill.

So you can have a seat and think, talk.

Good luck.

- How far up are you? - Third, across from Mr. Sokol.

- Eight months. -Don't forget to register another person in a month.

- Yes, of course. - For water, waste, etc... -We know.

It may not seem so, but diapers fill the trash cans fast. Right, Mrs. Zahradkova?

- Thank you. -Now you can stay put. We know everything.

I'd also like to welcome the Cermak brothers.

- They're the sons of the late Mr. Cermak. - Hello.

- Our condolences. -Our condolences. - Thank you. -Thank you.

- Wait. Mr. Cermak had sons? - Two? -Maybe even more. You never know.

You'd visited him a few times recently. I wondered who this is in my building.

- It was you. - Yep, us.

We were abroad for a long time so we didn't keep in touch much.

- Our parents divorced early on. - Where were you?

- We were living with our mother. - No, abroad where were you?

- Oh, I see. In America. - And Russia. We have a company there.

- In Russia? -And in America. - We didn't know where our father was.

Well, now you know, don't you? Real well.

We'd like to take the chance with what's left over from the funeral.

So whoever'd like to toast to our father.

- If I mean... - We don't have to right away.

So we don't hold things up.

- We should toast. He was a great guy. - He was a real nice man.

- Yours I mean, not mine. - Thank you.

They really got along. My mom I mean, I don't know about yours.

- You're twins? - Paternal, two eggs.

- That's like normal. Fees for two people. - So maybe we are just from one egg.

We don't know what we're going to do with the apartment. It all happened so fast.

We haven't read through the entire will.

- We're mainly here to get oriented a bit. - Good luck.

To Dad.

- Cheers. - To your dad. -Cheers.

I'm driving.

- How are you going to vote? - What do you mean? -How you're voting.

- With our hand. - There's two of you but just one unit

and since all our apartments are assessed equally, with equal strength of votes,

- only one of you can vote. - We'll figure that out.

If everyone's signed in, I'd like to move on...

Oh, just a detail. You've probably noticed that my mother's not here.

I had to take her to the hospital. So today it's just going to be me.

- And what happened? - Reaching up in the cupboard and bit it.

- She fell? -Down. - Is it serious? -Her hip.

- Hips with old people isn't good. - The doctor said it's about 50/50.

- I'm really sorry about that. - That's ok. I'll be fine. I come often.

I know how to vote. I sat there.

However, your mother is the owner, so you also need a power of attorney.

I have that of course, Hanka.

- And can I see it? - Of course.

- How old is your mother? - She's been retired 30 years, so about...

But only you've signed it, Jirka. We need the principal's signature, too.

Is he here?

- Your mom's. - Oh sure. Give it here. I'll scrawl it in.

I'm real sorry. So is she.

There it is.

Jirka, even had I shut my eyes, pretending you hadn't just signed it in front of us,

what's clear is her signature can't read "Mom".

I'm sorry.

I'm a bit out of it.

Oh, ok. I'll write down her name,

and sign it Svec... ova.

Just like on the social security checks.

Well, it definitely doesn't look like a valid power of attorney.

Mrs. Roubickova, the control authority's an important role and I value your concern,

but we all know Mr. Svec.

He lived in the apartment with his mom all his life, so it's not against anything

- to include him in today's meeting. - Legally, it's not ok.

Oh please. When I did it, we knew each other and we didn't need a POA.

And they also voted.

- And how... - Exactly.

- Let's move on to the next point... - What did you mean, "Exactly".

- Nothing. -Ok, roll call is o... - Why'd you say it?

- Mrs. Horvathova, you said "and how". - So?

- And I said "Exactly". - You see!

- Ok, roll call is over... - What did you mean by it?

I was alluding to the triviality of the people's vote

and the democratic deficit in times governed clearly ideologically.

- Oh, I see. - With the roll call, we reach a quorum.

Let's move to the first point, please.

Everyone got a list of points by email or in your mailbox.

- I don't have email. - Or in your mailbox.

- I didn't have it in my mailbox. - It's not possible, Mrs. Horvathova.

- We put them in everyone's. - Everyone's.

- I've only got the table with accounts. - Turn it over.

Oh ok, that's real confusing. It has to be on two separate pieces.

- I'm not prepared for it now... - Bylaws state an invite to an HOA meeting

must be delivered and hung up 15 days before the HOA meeting to all members.

That's why it's been posted on the board downstairs at least a month.

- Exactly 38 days. - 38 days. -Exactly.

- So I didn't notice it, ok. - But that's your fault, Mrs. Horvathova.

It's not my fault that board is so ugly. Not even a pig could orient itself in it.

- When Milos did it... - Don't drag me into this.

- Can we continue? - So buy new glasses. -Can we continue?

- Sorry. - What'd you mean by that?

That you should buy new glasses.

- But, I have glasses. - Mama has tons of glasses she doesn't use.

- I'll give you a pair. - I have glasses.

Wait, she left some in the ambulance. I can give you those right now.

- Here you go. - Glasses. -Thank you.

Everyone else received the invitation?

- Yes. - Thank you.

We can't find the key to the mailbox so we haven't read it yet. Can I get a copy?

- We'll just look at it. Shouldn't be long. - It's under your door. I picked it up.

We had a deal with your dad that I'd slide his mail under the door

since it's on my way up so he wouldn't have to go downstairs.

He is... was old.

- Oh, that's real nice, thanks. - We could then take the key from you.

- I don't have it with me. We can after. - Ok.

- My husband will pass it out to you again. - Or should I just bring it to you.

- Again? - Again.

I'd like to ask everyone to have a look at the accounts for the last period.

This really isn't 15 days in advance. I don't need it.

I don't see any accounts.

Turn it over.

We haven't yet assigned a scribe.

I thought my husband since Mr. Cicman's gone. If nobody's against...

Thinking is one thing, agreeing is another. This needs to be voted on.

Mrs. Roubickova, is it really necessary? We won't get to the important issues.

It looks a bit strange. The wife's the chairman, the husband the scribe.

- Nothing against you, Mr. Zahradka. - Yea, that would be a conflict of...

- Interests. -Yea, conflict of interests. - Everyone has it these days.

Their democracy is run by money launderers, developers, crooks,

all those white collar assholes.

That's true. It hard today to open a business.

- Mrs. Horvathova, you can be the scribe. - Yea. -She can't write.

- Cut it out. -She can verify the minutes. - She can't read. -Stop it.

My husband will take the minutes and Mrs. Horvathova will verify them.

We have to vote on that.

I'm holding a vote that my husband will take minutes of this meeting

- and Mrs. Horvathova will verify them. - We have to vote on it separately.

- Should I be writing this down? - You haven't been approved.

Bylaws are bylaws. I didn't make them up.

- Then we adhere to no rules and leave now. - That would be ideal.

Who's for my husband taking the minutes of tonight's meeting?

Mr. Bernasek, you act like you've known him since preschool. Not even she has.

- We can't vote, there's no scrutineer. - Who?

Jirka, first is always assigned someone to count the votes.

- Can't that be the scribe? - Not at all. -That'd be a conflict of...

- Interests. -What? - Conflict of interests.

So who'll be the scrutineer tonight?

- Me. -Mr. Svec, not you. - I don't care. I just wanted to be active.

- Anyone else? - It's my first big meeting here.

- I don't mind doing it. - Sorry, who are you with?

- Mr. Novak is my administrator. - And what does he administer?

Administer of my property. And personal advisor in technical matters.

- He cleans your pipes, huh... - Non-HOA members can't be the scrutineer.

- Can he even be here if he's not an owner? - Ok, so...

- He's actually a non-owner. - Shut up.

Bylaws state the presence of non-members should be approved at HOA meetings.

Mr. Novak has been with me at other HOA meetings. It's never been a problem.

- I vote. He explains. - That's why I'm here. Just to help.

Me too, Mr. Novak, and they didn't let me, Mr. Novak.

I don't mind. I'm not sure how to vote for the scrutineer when it's not been yet set.

Scrutineer 3.

Who's going to count the votes for a vote on who's counting the votes?

- The HOA can specify the scrutineer. - In small HOAs it's up to the chairman.

With the approval of the others. You didn't let me finish, Mr. Zahradka.

That's much easier, we could've done it like this last time.

Is anyone against Mr. Cermak being the scrutineer?

You're against, Mr. Svec?

- I'm voting. -For or against? - For. Always for. That's how I was taught.

Yea, but now is a vote for those against Mr. Cermak being scrutineer.

- So I vote "for" when I don't vote. - Bingo. -It's not that easy.

- One more time, please... - Mom made it look easy.

Is anyone against Mr. Cermak being tonight's scrutineer?

Mr. Bernasek, you act like you've known him since preschool.

The scrutineer has to be an HOA member and you said the will isn't finalized.

- It isn't completely. - But we have ownership rights to the unit.

Then you're automatically HOA members.

Yes. Membership is inseparably connected with the ownership of the unit.

More precise: membership comes with acquisition of ownership rights to HOA

and membership ends when ownership does.

So in that case, everything is just fine.

- But we should see some paper. - We've got it of course.

- A notarized will. - You can rely on us, Mrs. Roubickova.

The scrutineer should be verified, too.

- Serious? Yes.

My brother and I can divide it up to make it easier for everyone.

Scrutineer-Verifier. Or Verifier-Scrutineer.

So it's not a conflict of Pinterest.

Don't worry. We just want to make it easier, Mrs. Horvathova.

What's this verifier? When I did it, people just believed each other.

Milos, then you explain it at court, ok? How everything was totally against bylaws.

- Who'd take us to court. We're neighbors. - We don't know them.

- Maybe they're recording it. - Not all think like you, Mrs. Horvathova.

- So, let's move along. -What do you mean? - Nothing. Let's get started.

- Good, so we can vote... - What did you mean?

As an owner, I have the right to know what you meant.

That not everyone is as interested in others as intensively as you.

Can we vote for a scribe?

That's right. Nobody really cares about anyone anymore.

- Who is for it being my husband? - Really cares. That's beautiful.

You're married, co-owners. You have just one vote, so just one of you.

Mrs. Roubickova, my husband is voting for us. I'm for Cicman, ok?

- Six. - Verified.

Who's supposed to remember that. Write a "C" here then.

Or let the husband make a sock puppet - a little Cicman and always vote with it.

- Who's against? - Mr. Svec, you already voted.

- I'll put a "S" there, for Svec. - Ok, you can't vote for and against.

It's another vote?

This is left over from the last one.

- One against. - Verified.

- Who abstains? - This is pretty quick.

- Two. - Verified.

By the way, do you know what happened to the ones there before?

Mr. Zahradka has been voted scribe, that is me.

- Don't write that. - What? -The "me".

We have a scribe and Mrs. Horvathova will verify the minutes. Anyone against?

- So, one. - I don't want to do it. -Verified.

- But that's what you wanted. - I didn't. -I told you all she can't read.

- Stop it. -So it has to be me. - Are we going to vote on it?

No, it's without a vote. I'm on the audit board. That was voted on last time.

- Verified. - You weren't here.

Oh.

- So unverified. - Scribe. Verifier. Scrutineer.

- Three. - The verifier is Mrs...

So, let's consider this closed and we've just got an hour and a half.

- Not entirely. -What? - Not entirely. -So we manage a bit more.

Let's return back to the first point. The accounts. Anyone have anything to add?

- I don't understand the charge of 500. - Which 500?

- Bonus to the committee. - Mr. Kubat...

What's it for? There's no receipt, no details.

Mr. Kubat. I spend so much time on the building.

- You can't see it. - I do it because I'm on maternity leave.

- That's clear. - And you voted for me

because most of you want things to get better in the building.

So it doesn't fall down on our heads. So we have it nice here.

I don't care about your personal life but what's the money spent on?

Plus, it's imprecise. HOA is for ensuring admin of the building and property.

- Not so we can have it "nice here". - Fine. The 500 is primarily for phoning.

- Do you have your work and company phone separated? -Personal.

I have one phone and I can tell you that I spend much more than 500 a month.

You can tell us, but I don't see any accounting attached here.

You probably phone a lot since you have a lot of kids.

Really guys, she's not going to do accounting because of 500 CZK.

I don't know. When I did it, there wasn't any bonus. I arranged it all myself.

You met face to face. And if I couldn't manage that, I went to a phone booth.

Ok. My husband here will mark it off of my telephone account

what concerns home and I'll bring it to you.

Bring it to everyone. It's not about me. I'm a member of a team.

Fine. My husband will give it to you all.

- I don't want it. - Put it in the minutes. -I'll remember it.

It's not about you, it's the importance of the minutes.

Ok. Mr. Zahradka, husband of Mrs...

You don't have to write that. We all know whose husband you are.

It's obvious.

Ok, it was decided that all HOA members

will receive a detailed telephone account

used by the chairman of the HOA from Mr. Zahradka.

- You don't have to write that. - We could provide you with a work phone.

- We've got a lot of them. - And we're not using one of them at all.

I wasn't saying it to cause someone a financial burden.

No, it's not a burden. It's through our company and is a taxed expense.

- It actually helps when there's expenses. - I'm not sure that would work completely.

- Why wouldn't it? - If it's not in the minutes...

We were just talking about it, and I've got one here. A spare.

No need to decide now. So we're not held up. Let's keep going.

Thank you for the offer. Anyone else have anything about the accounts?

I don't mind making the expense for you.

What about the water?

- What water, Mrs. Horvathova. - Water consumption.

Yea, like always. By the number listed in the unit. You pay services for 1 person.

- But one isn't like one, is it. - Quiet. You can't count.

I use the same water for brushing my teeth, for coffee, for the toilet,

then I water Cermak's flowers, and the assholes up there take baths nightly.

- Careful what you say. - Mrs. Horvathova, we have 5 people listed

and I think that our economical lifestyle isn't so foreign.

It wasn't about you... more so the diapers flooding the trashcans in the afternoon.

- Mrs. Horvathova, your son never pooped? - Hey don't drag the boy into it.

Back then there weren't disposable diapers, Mr. Nitransky. Back then we saved.

That means nothing to you since you change people and things like socks.

- My mom has a diaper for multiple use. - What are you getting at? -I dry them.

There's 1 registered at your place but every night there's a visitor's footsteps.

They go home smelling all clean, and I won't stress it's always a different one.

And always a man.

You can't be serious.

Don't be ashamed. You're young, handsome, queer.

I just care that your water consumption doesn't correlate with a one-person unit.

Leave him alone. They're covered in love. They've got to clear themselves.

You realize I could sue you for this.

I said it and here it is. Neighbors against neighbors.

It's not just water. It's the hall lights. We got sensors on each floor to save,

but this gentleman, when he goes up, he lights up all of them

from the bottom all the way up... and one by one.

How should I do it when I live under the roof? Should I jump over a storey or what?

Walk faster so you don't overstrain the lightbulbs. They're efficient. Expensive.

Under socialism even the broken bulbs lit up. Whoever wanted could see.

- And you know how fast I walk upstairs? - Sober and alone, about 4 minutes.

With someone it's longer. And then he goes down and it all lights up again.

From top to bottom. Again one by one.

You know what, Agent Horvathova. I'll pay 100 more a month to shut you up.

- I don't care. You started it, not me. - You started it, but it doesn't matter.

- I didn't. You did. And 100 is not enough. - Please, let's not act like children.

- You started it with the kids' baths. - It was about the assholes, not the kids.

- That's even worse! - Careful what you say.

I didn't mean you. I meant Mrs. Prochazkova's.

Excuse me?

Mrs. Prochazkova, the truth upon looking into it, you're listed in your unit alone,

but there's constantly people coming and going.

- Negroes. - Of black complexion.

- In America they call them Afro-Americans. - Or "Colored". -There are none in Russia.

But in our building, there's a lot.

Mr. Svec, it's not my fault that you see double of everything.

I always get scared. White teeth in the dark.

The truth is, Mrs. Prochazkova, that there must be at least 10 of them.

I'm the owner of an apartment unit and I rent it out to six men from Ghana.

So they're rather Afro than American.

They study medicine here. You know I have deeply rooted Christian values

and it appeared to me as my responsibility to give them shelter when I can.

- Mr. Novak... - I've got a copy here of their documents

and we were going to register them officially after the meeting.

- Finally. - And register the exact number of people.

You know what I don't understand, Mr. Nitransky. That you, as a Slovak,

a member of an ethnic minority are picking on my Africans.

I have nothing against blacks, the exact opposite. There's just a lot of them.

You have to register the renters at once when it's rented.

We had to rush around with their papers. Their photos eat up a lot of the toner.

She first needed to try them out if they'd suit her liking.

- Excuse me, what did you mean? - Nothing.

But Mrs. Prochazkova has the right to know what you meant by it.

Just that you have them as sex slaves. We all know it.

- I'll take them out. - Are you implying

that I regularly, without their consent, have intercourse with them?

- Come on, let's act like adults here. - Come on. Let's go.

They can be spreading diseases like Embola. They say it's in the sperm.

I'm really sorry, Mrs. Horvathova, and to all who have to live under the same roof.

Thank you.

My God. My God. My God.

I was reading somewhere the Ebola in the sperm is nonsense. They're trying to scare you.

They also spread AIDS, while we probably already have it in our building... upstairs.

You can't be serious, can you?

Better blacks than Vietnamese. They cook meth.

I'm afraid of them too. Yellow teeth in the dark.

They're one building over and the whole place is all hopped up.

Nothing against you.

I'm Japanese.

- Chinese? - Japanese.

We could ask for some doctor's report from each new owner, couldn't we?

AIDS or HIV cannot be transmitted through meeting someone in the hall.

You know a lot about it.

I wouldn't change the HOA bylaws due to HIV. It's a lot of work.

- Did I miss anything for the minutes? - Not at all.

Mrs. Horvathova, please stop questioning whether the other owners have STDs.

- I guess so. - I don't care about your personal lives.

- It was just about the water. Six blacks... - Snow White.

Always showering and flushing. It's not a little bit.

If you'd agreed in the last meeting to installing a water meter in each unit...

No, not a water meter. They cost a lot of money.

You said so last time, but if we had water meters, we could move past the 1st point.

When I did it, there wasn't the need. People just trusted each other.

- How was it done when you did it? - Normally. Everything was everyone's.

After the revolution when the units were owned individually, you divided it up.

I always just kinda guessed.

People knew each other. They helped each other. They were closer to each other.

Milos was always closer to everything. Mainly on People's Housing Co-op.

I don't want to jump in, but I have a small company

that installs second hand water meters. Overall, it costs about half the price.

For amounts over 60,000, the HOA must offer a tender.

We could get that if they're third hand.

No water meters. People will cheat more.

How can you cheat it if you have the water meter installed directly to the supply.

Many ways. You can rewind it or slow the turning with a magnet.

Engineer Kubat explained the ways of tampering with a water meter.

- Write down only important things. - Minutes must include the date and place.

Accepted resolutions. Voting results.

And objections made against the decision requested to be included into the minutes.

I want there the medical report on AIDS.

Put there that next time we'll discuss the water meters. We'll look for three offers.

Please don't forget about me. Thanks.

And the doctor's confirmation, ok?

The meeting has agreed...

We're going to need to vote if the meeting has agreed.

Fine. Who is for the point in the next meeting about water meters?

Water, heating, gas.

Milos, are you mad? You want to pay for the blacks?

Do you know how much the installation costs? She still has to register them.

- Seven. -Of what? - Braves. -Verified.

Who's against?

- Jirka, you already voted. - That's an "M" for Mom.

- You have just one vote. - Really? So I'll take off mama.

- So, one against. - Verified.

Who abstains?

- Two. - Verified.

- So, a majority has approved. - You can put your hand down.

No, I just wanted to ask where the nearest toilet is.

Out the door, up the stairs, to the right.

- Isn't it to the left? - To the right.

I don't care. Go ruin the fund yourselves.

Milos, the vote approved discussing it, not installing them.

- Please, we've solved this. Let's move on. - Excuse me. I don't want to hold us up

but it's about the water. Mrs. Horvathova, you said you water our dad's flowers?

Yes, we had arranged it if he wasn't home.

Oh, that's really nice of you, thanks. So you have keys to the apartment?

Uh... yes, I do.

- We'll pick those up from you later, ok? - Ok, I don't know where... I'll find them.

- Good. -So. - Do you want mine, too?

I brought my mother to your father's sometimes. They played together.

Or you know, I'll get a copy made. So you have yours.

I've got a small locksmith shop.

We can make copies for everyone so there's not a mess of it.

- Can we move on, please? - Excuse me, just a minute. I'm sorry but...

Who all has a key to our apartment?

- He often babysat for us. - He gave the keys to us himself.

Cicman's, too.

We'd agreed in the event he left the iron on or the washing machine was leaking.

Sometimes he got a package that didn't fit.

It's good if neighbors have spare keys.

You don't know what can happen in the building when you're away.

It was always a question of honor for the admin to have keys from all units.

When I did it, nobody locked up. We helped each other. It was a different time.

And is there anyone who doesn't have keys to our apartment?

- Us. - I haven't had them for a long time.

- You can't go. - My wife is feeling a bit sick.

You've signed the attendance list. You have to be here the entire meeting.

Mr. Bernasek, I can walk your wife. There's two of us here and only one can vote.

Come on.

So after the meeting I'll go around and collect the keys from you, ok?

- I'll bring them to you myself. - So, all owners agreed to return the keys.

- Can we move on, please? - Here is 15,000 for blacksmith services.

That's for the iron bars in the cellar separating the other building from us.

Iron bars?

Our cellars were broken into again. They stole our bikes.

- They stole my in-lines. Brand new. - This is the first I'm hearing about bars.

- We needed to get it done quickly. - As it's been broken into several times.

Fine, but the bylaws give the committee 10,000 for maintenance and repairs.

Yes, but in some cases the committee can decide on larger amounts.

No no. It was greatly lowered after the last committee. You must have old bylaws.

- I didn't know that. - Ignorance doesn't excuse it.

That was still when I did it. But then, we still didn't spend. Then we saved.

By any chance does anyone have the current bylaws with them?

- Of course. I have them here. - I wanted to protect everyone's property.

Protect it, protect it, but in the hands of a proper caretaker as the law says.

If you need anything, I'll be here.

I've got a little blacksmith shop and we do bars, even artsy ones with leaves.

When I did it, there weren't break-ins. And when they did, not in our building.

And when it was, it was reported, investigated and punished.

- I know nothing about a reported break-in. - Me neither.

Were the planks to our cellar pried back?

- No, they weren't. -You see. - Be quiet. -Stop it.

They could've been taken off and then put back on.

Someone really smart then.

Or someone with keys to all common areas.

- Nothing of mine went missing. - Mine neither.

- Well now the bars are there. - Yes. They didn't steal anything from you.

Why? Because it was your son.

He loiters about, has keys to everything, wearing a hoodie, looking for drug money.

But he won't steal from his parents. He's scared. He'd get a spanking.

Excuse me.

I guess we're taking a break.

- Can I smoke here somewhere? - We used to smoke over there.

- Do you want one too? - If you're offering!

Everything ok?

- I could probably leave now. - Yea, we're taking a break. You can go.

Your wife is fine.

- It'll be ok. - What'll be ok?

Evidently nothing's been arranged with Mrs. Roubickova.

It has. We haven't even got to the main issues yet.

- You've got a boy, huh? - Yea, joint custody. I've no role in this.

- How old is he? - Thirty. The shitty joint custody.

- He's always hanging around my place. - Your place is mine too. So he's at mine.

Stop it Milos. We don't want to hear how many units you have and how you got them.

I got them normally. Transfer. Like everyone.

Like everyone from the People's Co-op, hm?

- What does that mean? Explain it to us. - Not me, but Mr. Sokol could tell it.

- Couldn't you, Professor Sokol. - Are you saying that Kubat owns his unit?

- Why are you bringing this up? - Because it's important.

We've got new members of the HOA. We have to tell them the truth.

- Is it true, Professor Sokol? - The Sokols knew what they were doing.

- How'd you do it? -Transfer. - Post-revolution classic.

He told them that if they want personal ownership of the apartment,

they'd have to pay a fee of 100,000, or they'd have to move out.

They didn't have it. So he offered to pay it for them

just for a small signature, and there you go, the apartment was his.

He just can't kick them out as long as they're alive.

- And Mrs. Sokolova isn't alive anymore. - Look, Mr. Sokol pays a regulated rent.

So he can behave like the owner.

It was an ideal option for him.

Post-revolution classic.

- Who of you was clinking your keys in November '89? -Me.

Sorry, but Mr. Sokol de facto isn't a member of the HOA? Or rather de jure.

De jure. De jure. Let's vote on it. There's no sense in it though.

Back to the break-in. How about installing a security camera?

- It's expensive. Costs a fortune. - I have a small company

that does security cameras and just fake ones.

It scares people away and it's cheap.

Boys, Mommy's going to be fine.

And quit staring at the phone.

Go ahead and turn it back on.

Did we miss something for the minutes?

- No. - There was a break.

Thanks for understanding.

We can go on and start the main point why we are here today.

But the Bernaseks haven't returned yet.

Just a detail. The cleaning company seems to me really lazy for the money we pay.

In my place the mopping is real spotty.

If you're thinking about changing, I've got this little cleaning company.

Price can't be beat and quality is top.

- Property management gets the cleaners. - Sorry, I'll do the mopping myself.

- Thank you. About selling the attic space. - No way. Selling the attic isn't possible.

There are many important reasons for it. The roof needs a complete renovation.

The roof tiles are falling. threatening pedestrians. The skylights are rotting.

We need an elevator. We have to put new gas lines in the whole building.

- And in the fund for repairs is 150,000. - 150,003.

- I don't know about the gas. It's so hot. - It is hot, Mr. Kubat. It's really hot.

And it'll be even hotter because maybe the building will blow up

and then the whole street, the whole quarter and whole city.

If you all want to talk in such a hysterical atmosphere, I don't know.

The inspector said unless we do something, they'd vacate the area at our expense.

That's right. It's a crack, explosion, shock wave... and that's it. I've seen it.

The fund won't pay to evacuate the block.

Shut it. Which inspector was it? I know them. They exaggerate so they're covered.

So they make some money. They pass along projects like this.

The investigation committee strongly recommends a pressure strength test.

- Which our building might not survive. - Us either.

And as chairman, I'll go to prison because I didn't do the investigation.

But why doesn't our property management solve this?

- Because they don't have money from us. - They also want to cancel our contract.

- Well, Is there a leak anywhere? - When there's a leak, it'll be too late.

My mom has a leak.

- If there's no leak, what we're solving? - Lifespan.

The pipes haven't been changed since the 50s when they were installed.

- If it's from the 50s, they'll go forever. - This is an absolutely absurd debate.

Back then they were made from steel, not plastic like today.

Do you know what temperature steel was hardened at back them?

Try putting PVC in a microwave.

- Shall I write we want another inspection? - Nobody will give us another one.

- Plus it costs more money. - That's why I'm offering a solution.

- Me too. -What? - Do the inspection ourselves.

- I've got a little company... - How do you want to do it yourself?

- Do you have some certificate? - We'll go unit by unit.

We'll ring the bell and if it doesn't blow up, then everything's fine.

If I remember, HOA, from the bylaws, is responsible to check the common area

gas lines to the gas meter valves. And we've all got those in the hallway.

Milos, the owner is required to maintain the gas apparatus used in such a state

- as to not cause threat to life. - Nor health or property of other persons.

- You didn't let me finish, Mr. Zahradka. - I know it by heart.

I've studied it a bit and for common areas of the building that the HOA solves,

areas of concern are those designated for common use, chiefly the foundation, roof,

main vertical and horizontal structures, entrances, stairways, halls, balconies,

terraces, laundry rooms, drying rooms, baby stroller rooms, furnace rooms,

chimneys, heat exchangers, heating distributors, hot/cold water distributors,

sewage, gas, electricity, air conditioning, elevators, lightning rods,

common antennas, even if they are placed outside the building.

I didn't know about the antennas.

If they found serious problems, and you don't get rid of them, they'll sue you.

Oh, and here it is. Neighbors against neighbors.

I have an idea. I have a little pet shop. I could put a canary on each floor

and when it dies, we know we have a little bit and go quickly to another floor.

- I must be dreaming. - It'd save a lot. A canary costs just 50.

- A hamster is cheaper. - Enough!

I don't care anymore. Just count on them turning off our gas in a month.

You should leave the gas.

For suicide.

Should I add that to the minutes.

Look, we're opening a small office building in the center

and we can easily hide the inspection of this building in it.

- No problem at all. - Well if you're going to do it anyways.

Thanks for the offer, but this is more complex. Not procrastinating it.

It's not just the gas. We have a big structural investment. The elevator.

The arguments are clear. It's really torture dragging stuff to the 4th floor.

- It's really difficult with the kids. - So you shouldn't have had them.

Before the invention of the elevator, people didn't have kids?

There's more reasons. Like Mrs. Svecova can hardly walk.

Truth is she stopped leaving her apartment.

- We should think about the elevator for her. -But she'll die and then what?

Then there's the Bernaseks who are expecting another member. So, I'll...

I don't want an elevator.

- Excuse me? -I don't want an elevator. - Why? -Just because.

- Because why? - No, my young queer fellow, means no.

But you can't just say no. You have to have an argument.

Calm down young fellow.

Shut up. This is none of your business. Why don't you want an elevator?

You want an argument: Here. An elevator would greatly increase the noise.

In which you don't live.

We've received a few offers, and one is very low noise, Mrs. Prochazkova.

We have options. The classic rope lift, which is understandably cheaper.

Don't ever tell me again to shut it. Or I really will kill you.

In our building it'd be about 1.3 million. Then there's a pricier option.

The hydraulic platform, no engine room. Completely silent.

- That'd run 1.8 million. - I don't mind the sound of the elevator.

I mind the sound of people going past my door to the elevator.

- I see. -And it'll bother my young black men while they're studying.

So get soundproof doors.

They should soundproof you. All of you.

Fags have more rights today than people.

Mrs. Prochazkova. You don't want it because you live on the ground floor.

That's your interpretation.

Does the word solidarity mean anything to you? An elevator means nothing to you,

but you're not going to resist because it's good for those living above you.

We all live in one building. Just like when there's a flood and you're flooded

because you live on the ground floor while the rest live above,

we will help you because that's solidarity.

That's Europe. Civilization. Do you understand at all?

As I said, Judeo-Christian values are not foreign to me.

I definitely understand the necessity of an elevator, and an option always exists.

Mr. Novak.

Mrs. Prochazkova won't be against it if she gets proper financial compensation.

- You want a bribe? - No, never. Compensation.

- Doesn't that sound just a bit silly? - Mr. Nitransky, let's put aside emotions.

I'm not talking about emotions. I'm talking about morals.

So let's put aside even morals.

With the construction of an elevator, the price of your units will be higher.

The price of mine will stay the same.

You came here to provoke us?

Feel free to start it on the 3rd floor.

Are you fucking kidding me?

This should be in the minutes.

Are you ok, Roman?

I don't know.

- Can we continue? - Once it's noted down.

Ok, so...

Mrs. Prochazkova,

an owner of a ground floor unit,

rejected a debate about the construction of an elevator.

- Mister... - Mr. is enough.

- Mr. Nitransky... - The Third.

Mr. Nitransky III expressed his disapproval

and was physically attacked...

He attacked me first. You all saw it didn't you.

- First there was the slap. That's right. - It was an act of self-defense.

- Because he threatened to really kill me. - Because first you verbally attacked me.

Everyone here today has verbally attacked me. Most of all Mr. Kubat.

- You mean your sexual orientation? - I said it first.

- Ok, so I'll start. So Mister Kubat... - Mr. Is enough.

Mr. Kubat slandered Mr. Nitransky's...

The Third.

You know what.

Mr. Nitransky III's membership

of the homosexual minority.

- We're not really putting that in, are we? - We really are.

- Should I put it there or not to. - Is it really necessary?

- It's really holding us up. - Really. -Nothing happened.

Roman, do you insist on this incident being in the minutes?

No.

- But get that aggressor to move back. - Please.

Ok, as you wish but then this really shouldn't escape these walls.

Why are you looking at me?

Look, why don't we end it today. We're all tired. Ok?

- And not argue about what we don't have. - That's why we're talking about it.

An elevator is one of many on the list of things we dearly need and can't afford.

That's why I wanted to talk about this one main point, selling the attic space.

No. Not the attic. It's our one common property. We have to protect it.

When I did it, we bought what we had money for.

Once we save money for an elevator, let's get it.

- We'll be saving for another 20 years. - So we'll be saving for another 20 years.

- You've been saying that for 20 years. - You've been here only 8, so you're lying.

He's right. You've been saying it 20 years.

The 8 I've been here, I've been trying to get an elevator installed.

You always say, "It's not the right time", "Once we've saved it".

I don't want to wait until I'm 80 like Mrs. Svecova.

I think my mom is older.

Can't we take out a mortgage?

Mortgage? No, no chance. You must be secured through the building.

Outside it's common in such urgent cases.

Outside maybe, but never in the building. We'd all end up real quick on the street.

- Outside... - Now's not a good time for a mortgage.

- For you it's never a good time. - Because the good time has passed.

We can also put it together outside the fund. Everyone gives a certain amount.

No way. We've paid into the fund longer than the buildings around. I know that.

For those that don't have the financial options,

- we could make a payment calendar. - Or an advantageous loan.

Let's not think up other solutions when a great one exists. Selling the attic.

- Exactly. - You sure are in a rush to sell the attic.

Mr. Kubat, the roof needs a big investment so it doesn't fall apart.

It leaks. There are termites and the roof tiles are falling onto the street.

- I go there to change washing bowls. - I bet you put termites there yourself.

- Why would I do that? - So you could enlarge your little brothel.

- Shut it. - This isn't worth it.

- Let's all be adults. Roman, come back. - You're on the attendance sheet.

I'll tell you all how it is. It's not about selling the attic, but a sly act

to get a two-story unit in our building under very advantageous conditions.

No, I'm going to protect this building to my last breath.

- You're an old Bolshevik asshole. - This is what your solidarity looks like.

Roman, please sit down.

Mr. Kubat, the attic, as it is, is useless.

Our old neighbor made good use of it.

Several options exist what to do with the attic if we decide to cash it in.

It's possible to sell it all to a developer who will build some units

- that can then be sold. - No, nothing's going to be sold.

Or we can build the apartments ourselves and have a say on who to rent it to.

- And a profit. - HOA can't start a business.

Yes, we'd have to then set up a co-op.

When there was the People's Co-op, it was better. And it will be again. Soon.

So, if we built in the attic, an elevator would automatically have to be put in?

It probably would have to.

I think from the sixth floor up there has to be an elevator.

Concerning our building, if adding a floor or reconstruction

to add to the number of units, you'd have to add an elevator.

So I'm against the attic, too.

Nobody's ever going to building anything. This discussion is pointless.

Our building has poor structure. The foundation is on sand.

After the floods, it's unstable and we can't strain it with any extra add-ons.

It's interesting all buildings nearby have add-ons. They're still standing.

- So, you do want to build an apartment? - I said nothing of the sort, Mr. Kubat.

And even if I were to consider, I'd buy the attic for a normal market value

and only the building would make money.

Nobody wants to do anything behind the back, Mr. Kubat.

Everything is transparent. So the building doesn't collapse.

It's interesting. In my bathroom I have a huge crack that's bigger every day.

So show it to us.

- I'm telling you it's there. - But nobody has ever seen it.

- We need to believe one another. - You've never let anyone into your place.

Why should I guide someone around my apartment? I'm not like you.

If you speak about the crack so much, you should let somebody have a look.

- Or at least take a picture. - Here with the spare phone.

Why should I photograph my privacy?

Mr. Kubat here's a structure appraisal. The foundation is fine.

- How much did you pay for that? -8,000. - Was it discussed? -No, it wasn't.

- Only the committee can release funds... - That's why. I'm sorry.

Get a geothermal probe done and you'll see no extra add-on is allowed.

- A geothermal probe? - What's that? -In outer space.

It's a really deep borehole. Not some paper from an underpaid statistician.

But that's used when you want to use heat from the Earth's core.

- There will be no add-on. - That's right. There won't. Not possible.

- Quiet. You're not possible. - It doesn't have to be an add-on.

It can be just reconstruction. Today it's from lightweight materials.

Much lighter than the rotting beams.

Nobody's touching the attic. The end. I'll never sign it. End of discussion.

- You also want some money out of it. - I don't want money.

- I'm protecting the building. That's it. - Milos, sit down.

You're on the attendance sheet.

- Mr. Kubat. - What is it, stupid?

The roof alone is hundreds of thousands. See the elevator as an investment to it.

- A screen against pigeons. - Sure.

If it's about the building as you say, then this way it'll be more beautiful.

- We'll enjoy living in it more. - Maybe you'll enjoy living in it more.

- Because you're a fag up to the attic. - Wait, I can't keep up. Mister Kubat.

Mr.

Mr. Kubat suggested a geothermal probe...

Don't write it if nobody knows what it is.

- Just put there the important things. - But I haven't got anything there.

I don't want to steal anything. I don't want to harm anyone.

And even if I expanded my unit upstairs, so what? I'd pay the same as anyone else.

- We'd invest it back into the building. - He really doesn't have anything.

Plus there won't be anyone new. You know me. There aren't any problems.

What about the lightbulbs?

It's better than having a new person abiding by your requirements,

reminders and opinions and we wouldn't agree on anything.

The less people, the better. Tell me what's so bad about that?

- Everything. Everything is wrong with it. - Excuse me?

I see not one reason why you should have a bigger unit than the rest.

That would completely throw off the owners shares to the common parts.

- Are there any more cakes? - Mrs. Roubickova, we had an agreement...

Why do you keep winking and whispering to me.

Do you think that I didn't try? I tried. You know what he said?

- He'll sign off on it under one condition. - Under what?

- Let him tell you himself. - That was between us.

Sweetheart, breathe.

Hot water, quick.

The whiskey, Mr. Svec. The whiskey, Mr. Svec.

What's the address? A lady is going into labor.

- Careful, she's Chinese. - I'm Japanese!

- I'm sorry. I'm not in labor. - Verified.

That's good.

That's a shame. I already saw the head of the new HOA member.

That was stressful!

We think we're a bit stuck on this attic affair. What if the two of us put together

- an investment plan for the next meeting... - A professional one.

- We need to look at the fund admin. - And now let's put it to the side.

- Let's put it aside until another time. - The lady here also has put it aside.

I don't want to. I don't want to. I don't want to put aside anything.

It's always pushed aside and nothing ever happens. You're here for the first time.

You have no idea how things work in the building. Nothing ever moves.

I want something to finally happen, or the building will rot away before our eyes.

So, I'm raising a vote to propose selling the common attic space

for the necessary investment to the emergency state of our building.

- What emergency... - Quiet.

Who's for?

- Four. -Cicman. - So, five. -Verified.

- Who's against? - Svec, you've already voted.

- Yea, the first one was for my mom. - You have just one vote.

So I'll leave my mom's.

- Three against. - Verified.

And you all?

- We abstain. - We need more time.

Mrs. Horvathova, what bothers you about it.

You'll have an elevator. No mold in your bathroom from the rotten skylights.

You won't go to the attic to change bowls.

- There'll be a screen against pigeons. - Yes, there will be a screen.

Will there really be a screen? The pigeon shit really pisses me off.

- Yes, there will be a screen. - The front door opens badly in winter...

- We'll fix the door. -We'll redo it. - We'll redo it. -I have a small company.

Well it actually isn't such a bad idea.

Good, and Mrs. Prochazkova, how much to imagine for the elevator?

- I can't tell you off the top of my head. - Ok, we'll put it in the minutes

to find out how much the units will be worth

if the building has an elevator and pay Mrs. Prochazkova the proportionate.

- We'll have to vote on that. - Quiet! You'd agree with such conditions?

Jewish values aren't foreign to me.

Ok, I'll raise another vote to propose selling the common attic space

for the necessary investment to the emergency state of our building.

- Emergency... - Quiet!

Who's for?

Cermaks, believe me. You don't know anything about this building.

Exactly. We still need a bit of time to get ourselves oriented.

Look, this is a ridiculous comedy.

You can call a vote to sell the attic if we don't have any proposal or plan.

- The vote was to discuss, not to sell. - So what. You can't do it like this.

This is how it's being done, Mr. Kubat! This is how it's being done!

Just give us a little hope that we can consider the attic.

- We'll prepare proposals and plans. - Keep you hope. The fund won't pay it.

I clearly said no. The attic won't be sold as long as I'm alive.

You need 100% approval of all owners for the common spaces.

Go and vote, but I won't sign. I won't.

- Why, Mr. Kubat? -Tell us your arguments. - I've been telling you the whole time.

- They've all been disproved! - Structure, foundation, reconstruction.

- Just no. Period. - You have to have a reason! -I don't.

I don't have to have anything. I'm an owner. Understand? Owner.

That's enough. No is no. No is a reason. No is an argument. No is my right.

You won't overturn my vote. Never. I have three units.

- You are the king of all assholes. - I never will.

Goodbye.

You went too far, Milos. He was on the attendance sheet.

- Now the whole meeting is for nothing. - It was for nothing from the start.

So I'll go ahead and tell you all.

Milos will sign the attic once he can finally give the third unit to his son.

He can't as long as Sokol is alive.

Exactly.

I don't care. The boy has keys to the unit anyways. I just can't sign it over.

You make me sick. I quit.

I quit. Someone else do it.

- I don't give a damn anymore. - It doesn't work like that.

A member of the committee, the chairman, must hand in the resignation to the HOA.

- Resignation? I hand in my resignation. - Written.

I'm handing in my written resignation.

Zdenek, be so kind and write up my resignation.

- Here? Now? - Yes. Here and now.

And hand it in. You're in the committee.

- Come calm down a bit and then we can... - Write my resignation at once!

I don't know how you write it. Can we talk about it first outside.

Nobody's going outside.

So if you don't know how to write a resignation, then write this:

I resign! Zahradkova.

- Honey, you need to relax. - Don't call me honey.

It's all your fault anyways. You said that I'd like it.

That I'd be bored at home.

You, again you, always you and always wrong.

Always everything wrong. My whole life with you is wrong.

Now you listen good and well, darling.

Do you think I enjoy always listening to your hysterical accusations?

Your banter of self-pity? You think I like doing everything just to make you happy?

So you don't by chance have a bad mood?

Have you noticed I do almost everything at home?

I iron, vacuum, wash the dishes.

I prepare all the materials for these fucking meetings like some secretary!

You've destroyed my male identity. Even my therapist says that.

Fuck, you didn't even ask and made me 3 children. Who asked you to do that?

You're as big of a cunt as your mother.

My mother is a horrible cunt.

And I resign my function in the committee. Effective immediately!

And now hand that in to whoever you want.

Let's go. Come on.

Goodbye.

Let's go. Come on.

Careful.

Don't go.

You will finish the meeting in your role as chairman of the HOA.

- You will finish according to the bylaws. - Fuck the bylaws.

You will finish according to the bylaws.

You will finish the meeting!

It's a zoo, isn't it.

You're going nowhere I said. Nowhere!

Quiet!

My phone's ringing.

I'm an owner now, too.

Our condolences.

And congratulations.

I'm an owner now, too.

I'm an owner.

I'm an owner.

I'm an owner.

I'm an owner!

I'm an... owner.

My brother and I were speaking that if Mrs. Zahradkova doesn't want to do it...

That we were under that impression...

We would happily take over for now.

It's a really demanding role. And we aren't surprised by her.

But since there's two of us, we would handle it better.

- But you have a lot to do, don't you? - We would be completely devoted to it.

- We want to be here in Czechia. - We've travelled enough.

- Settle down a bit. - We like it here.

- Even the building is nice. The location. - Now that we've got to know it better.

We'd really enjoy it.

Boys, I don't want to discourage you, but there's a lot of shit.

We've also quickly looked at the bylaws. Maybe a bit of innovation is all we need.

- In accordance with the new civil code. - To better reach a common agreement.

To do it more flexibly and maybe with less bureaucracy.

New bylaws need to be approved. And that can take a long time.

- And it costs a fortune. - We know some lawyers who'd do it for us.

- Real cheap. - And fast.

The truth is we'll elect a new committee anyways, and then elect a chairman.

We can do that now. We still have a few minutes.

So we don't waste all of the next meeting.

The bylaws don't flat out forbid it. But we'd have to take attendance again.

Without Nitransky and the Zahradkas there are different voting proportions.

- The Cicman's POA is also invalid. - They're be surprised once they get back.

That'd be great. We'd prepare some plans until the next meeting.

We'll find out the actual condition of the building

and make some calculations and visualizations.

- Those are useless investments. - It'll get lost in our company books.

We'll prepare some proposals so everyone's happy.

Even Mrs. Prochazkova, and the Bernaseks. There's definitely a way here.

We can always come to an agreement. We're adults.

It doesn't sound like a bad idea.

- Someone else has to be with you all on the committee. -How about you?

Not a chance. I don't want to do it. I'll keep up the audit.

- Ok. Mr. Kubat? - With your experience.

I don't know. It's all so quick.

How about Mr. Svec?

For now.

If we're in agreement, we don't need to take attendance. We can just vote, right?

The truth is nobody wants to do anything.

Ok, so who's for the committee being the Cermaks and Svec.

Mr. Bernasek.

- Seven. - Verified.

- Don't forget about my little companies. - Of course.

I'll take quick minutes of the meeting. Who'll be the chairman and the deputy?

- My brother and I will divide it up. - There' won't be a conflict...?

- No, we're from two eggs. - There's no real rush.

Good, so you'll let us know in advance the date of the next meeting.

Of course.

Sorry, it just occurred to me.

Maybe it'd be easier

if everyone signed a power of attorney, so we don't bother you with every detail.

So we don't need to meet every moment. The whole process will be more effective.

And for you it's far more comfortable.

- And do you have them with you? - No, we don't.

- We can't print them here somewhere, huh? - Probably not.

Well, we could do it now if you'd just sign this blank paper.

And we'll print the power of attorneys onto them.

Take it that we are a kind of safeguard to make sure nobody ends up on the street.

Which today can happen really quickly.

I'll be glad if I never have to come here again.

Finally, someone's taking it into their own hands. Like a company.

Goodbye.

I understand. We'll come to some agreement.

Mr. Svec.

Mr. Svec, we need to get up.

Let's go home.

Just sign here, ok?

Here. Down here.

- Dad already left? - Here.

Ok.

Cake.

Phone.

Let's go.

Here. Here.

Hello.

We're closing.

All right.

Careful at the stairs.

Screenplay and Directed by

Produced by

Cameraman

Edited by

Sound by

Script Editor Executive Producers

Set Designer Costume Designer Makeup Artist

Music by

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