All language subtitles for American Housewife (2016) - S03E15 - American Idol (1080p AMZN WEB-DL x265 MONOLITH)

The best part of being a party planner
is taking stuff home.

Leftovers, free flowers. And when would
we ever splurge on a mini balloon

archway?

Look at this.

Chip got my reviews on Little Shop of
Horrors framed for me.

The school newspaper says it was a
triumph. And the Westport Gazette said

maybe worth seeing. That's great.

I'm proud of you. This just confirms
exactly what I've been thinking. I'm not

going to go to college so I can
concentrate on becoming a singer. For

thousandth time, you are going to
college.

Or, hear me out, I can take my college
fund and go to L .A. and become a

If anybody's taking your college fund
and blowing it on a trip, it's going to

me. I'm not stupid.

I have a plan.

I'm going to go on American Idol, sing
my heart out, leave with a golden

boom, pop star.

Then I meet a charming man on a flight
from Paris, second boom, He's the king

Sweden. I'm a queen.

That's not how it works. And he'd still
have to go to college.

Well, Katy Perry didn't go to college.

In fact, she dropped out of high school
to pursue music.

You could have an amazing voice and
still never make it. That's why it's

important for you to have an education
to fall back on. You're my parents.

Aren't you supposed to tell me that
dreams are worth fighting for and that I

should believe in myself?

Nah. Uh -uh.

Dream crushers!

Sure. We'll make it our kid miserable.

But we're doing it together.

Hi, what's your name?

Taylor Otto.

And where are you from?

I'm from Westport, Connecticut.

And how young are you?

I'm 17.

17? Yeah.

What are you going to sing for us? Climb
by Maya Cyrus.

All right, go for it. I can almost see
it.

That dream I'm dreaming, but there's a
voice inside my head. Okay.

Thank you. That's enough. Mom?

Dad? Where are the judges? We are the
judges. Let me just tell you something.

That, um, I was not feeling that. No, it
made my ears sad. You should just go to

college. Following your dreams is
overrated. I agree with that 100%. I

Lionel, Katie, and Luke were my parents.

Well, they're not.

Dreamcrushers!

Hey, Kateray. This is why people keep
reporting you to HR, Kevin.

Right.

Anyway, Whitney wants to see you. She is
in your office. It's probably just

another Westport housewife wanting to
throw another party with another

I want a pink chocolate fountain.

A what?

A Pui Pui Se fountain. What's that now?

A bone broth fountain.

Whaaa?

A La Mer face serum fountain.

Katie, maybe you could try some.

Hide those fountains.

Katie!

I'm on medical leave again.

You think the camera can't see you
there, Kevin?

Oh, hey.

How's it going?

Did you get my edible arrangement?

Shut up, Kevin.

On it. Katie.

I need you to take over an event for me.
It's the Westport Businesswomen's

Awards. Oh, I'm so excited I get to do
something honoring my fellow working

women. You can count on me, Whitney.

Great. Now, if you'll excuse me, they're
injecting the anesthesia. Are you

calling me from the operating table?

Ten, nine, eight, seven.

And now, Taylor thinks that she can skip
college and become a pop star and

follow her dreams.

This whole dream thing is BS.

I'm not raising wussies like everyone
else in this town.

Sure, I get them music lessons, but not
so they can become musicians.

I do it so they learn discipline, focus,
and hard work.

My mom did the same for me, and I turned
out great.

Okay, look, if you try and shut Taylor
down, she might run off and pursue her

dream anyway. My cousin wanted to be a
dancer, so she ran away from home. And

now she's a rockette. What?

pretty big deal no she's a rockette
that's what they call strippers in

rock so telling her no might backfire on
me it's not enough to injure a dream

you have to kill it slowly but
completely like my kids did with those

crabs they smuggled in from mexico how
am i supposed to do that i'll just loan

you ms bell my kid's music teacher she
sucks all the joy out of music she's a

real throwback to the golden age of
truly abusive educators

You're not going to believe this. Abe
Henderson died.

Who's Abe Henderson?

He was in charge of keeping supply lines
open for our regiment.

He ordered our lunches. Historical Guild
is losing people left and right. We

need new, young members. So I had this
brainstorm.

I made these scrolls, and I'm going to
put them up all over town.

Yeah, kids will totally go for that.
Scrolls are so in right now. It's not so

crazy people would like scrolls. It's
the most fun kind of paper.

Dad, if you really want to get through
to young people, you should make a video

and post it on social media.

Right. The key is to make something that
goes viral so it has to be memorable.

Flashy, but never desperate. Funny
without trying too hard. Quirky, but not

lame. Got it.

Can we revisit the scroll? I made 50 of
them.

Haver, I have been thinking about our
conversation yesterday.

If you want to be a singer, you've got
to work at it.

So, I got you a couple of music lessons
with the person who teaches Doris' kids.

So awesome. Thank you, Mom.

What was that?

Oh, I was writing a song about what a
terrible mom you are. But now I'm going

throw it out.

You might want to keep it.

So this is the music space I built for
my

kids. Wow, Doris, you're such a
supportive mom.

Yeah, sure, whatever.

Hi.

You don't use your voice unless you're
singing.

While you can.

I didn't even know there was a business
women's association in Westport.

Can't wait to meet them and talk shop.

I must be in the wrong place. I'm
looking for businesswomen. We are the

businesswomen.

No, you're not.

Buying things from businesses doesn't
make you businesswomen. If you recall, I

made all that peppermint bark last year.
And I got all caught up in that Ponzi

scheme, remember?

And I just thought of the name of the
jewelry business that I might start.

Glamville, by Nancy Granville.

I know, it's so good.

Katie, I'm just gonna do this.

This is still a party celebrating
working women, so I was thinking we

seminar with successful mompreneurs.
Katie, it's really not that kind of a

thing. This is the kind of party where
we drink champagne and honor each other

for the important work we do in
Westport.

For example?

Last year, I received a Lifetime
Achievement Award.

For what? For all of my achievements.

Don't worry about us. You just need to
figure out a fountain that has never

done before. Sure.

I will get right on that.

I'm not sure what kind of fountain I'm
doing yet, but there's definitely going

to be pee in it.

Today, you will sing Row, Row, Row Your
Boat.

You will start when I say start.

Good.

Start.

Now, off pitch, again.

No, again.

Until I hear perfect rows. No vote for
you. Now row, again.

No, again.

No.

I've been playing the same note for six
months.

Fun is coming!

The fun is coming! To the Westport
Historical Guild.

So saddle up your steed and take a ride
through history!

What does membership entail? Fear not,
for I shall explain it all to you in

90 short minutes.

90 minutes?

I know, don't worry, it's only part one.

We'll just do the video for you.

I thought mine was good.

This lack of self -awareness is part of
the problem, Greg.

They approved my idea for a kombucha
fountain.

I'm surprised you know what that is. I
didn't. I googled, what do idiots love

drink? And kombucha was the first thing
that came up.

How was the lesson?

The worst.

I'll never make it as a professional
singer.

I can't even sing Row, Row, Row Your
Boat.

Guess I'll have to figure out something
else to spend my college fund on.

College? You're going to spend it on
college?

Wow.

That Miss Belt really delivered.

Maybe I can send you to Miss Belt to
break your love of whistling while you

your nose hairs.

Not a chore if you're cheerful.

You're not going to hang those up?

What's the point?

I really thought singing was going to be
my career. It's something I'm good at.

At least I thought I was.

That teacher didn't believe in me.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

You always say if you have your dream
job, then it's not work.

Dad has his dream job.

You have yours.

Yeah. Thought I found mine.

Oh, honey.

There are plenty of things that you are
good at.

Like what?

Oh, honey.

I can almost see it, that dream I'm
dreaming, but

there's a voice inside my head saying,
you'll never reach it.

Every step I'm taking, every move I make
feels

lost with no direction.

My faith is shaking, but I...

I gotta keep trying.

Gotta keep my head held tight.

Cause there's always gonna be another
mountain.

I'm always gonna wanna make it move.

Always gonna be an uphill battle.

But sometimes I'm gonna have to lose.

Ain't about how fast I get there.

Ain't about what...

I appreciate it.

Luke, what do you think? We knew the big
note was coming.

I didn't know.

Can she get there? And you got there.
Thank you.

Good job.

Always like little surprises, but you're
a natural at this. You know that. Very

good.

Taylor, when I was 17, I had the same
type of dream. I was going to do it. I

going to go for it. I needed someone to
believe in me, and I really believe in

you. Thank you. So should we give her a
vote? Let's do it.

Okay. I'm ready.

I'm a yes.

Yes? Yes.

I'm a yes.

And I'm ready.

I'm a yes.

You're going to Hollywood. You're going
to Hollywood.

Come on.

Congratulations. Thank you so much. All
right. That'll be something to take home

to your mom and dad. For sure. Will do.

Yeah. Take care. Very good.

Oh, my God.

Hey, congratulations.

Thank you so much. I can't believe it.
How does it feel to be holding the

ticket? It feels like a dream.

Oh, no.

It was a dream, Luther, but I'm gonna
get there for real.

Damn right you are.

Can you talk?

And the award from Best Idea for a
Business, if eBay wasn't already a

goes to... Nifty Crandall!

That's it.

Well, how will people know when the
meetings are or where to sign up for the

Westport Historical Guild? That was the
whole point of this. They will look it

up. Trust me. Here's what people care
about on the Internet.

Parkour fails and dogs dress as people.

Well, I really don't get it, but if you
guys believe in it, I guess I trust you.

Millard Fillmore dressed up as Beagle in
a tuxedo. So, you know, there's

historical precedent.

Dad, you are the Snapplecap of people.

I can't.

I had a dream last night that I
auditioned for American Idol and Katy

she believed in me. I can do this. I can
feel her vibration.

She's coming.

Miss Belt is coming.

You came back. And you're smiling.

Well, we'll take care of that.

Begin with Ro.

Ro. No.

Again.

Row, row. How dare you do a second row?

Row, row, row your boat gently down the
stream. Stop that right

now. What are you doing? What are you
three doing?

Put them down.

That was pretty good.

You!

What the hell have you done?

You and your joy have ruined everything!

Your father said I was crazy when I
wanted to build this soundproof room

two -way mirror to keep an eye on
things. Well, who's crazy now?

Ah! Fire!

And the award?

for best acceptance speech from last
year goes to... Oh my gosh!

It's me!

Oh, thank you.

Hopefully this is like that movie where
someone calls you and if you answer, you

die.

Damn.

Hi, George.

Miss Belt was supposed to make singing
so hard it broke Taylor, but instead,

Taylor... broke miss spelt with her
passion and her dream well it's not a

of your cheerful am i quoting greg's
nose hair trimming mantra well i won't

it in my house man i think i played this
wrong gotta go dora you owe me three

more life children and i know somewhere
inside me is that little girl from

tennessee who never could have seen
herself standing here i'm not done this

supposed to be an event about women
supporting women And I haven't been the

supportive woman myself.

My daughter told me her dream, and I
tried to crush it.

Instead of crushing her dreams, I should
follow her lead and find one of my own.

We all should.

You're intelligent women. Should you
really be giving yourselves awards for

doing nothing?

Come on.

Say, you sound stupid, but there's got
to be some brains in your head.

Thank you.

And Nancy.

Take Glanville and actually do something
with it. You're right. I have a real

responsibility. I think the world needs
Glanville now more than ever.

Suzanne, you are so much better than
repackaging store -bought peppermint

as your own. You know.

Oh, everybody knows.

And Tara, I think you'd be amazing at
jumping off a bridge and hitting as

many things as possible on the way down.

Ladies.

You've got to find your dream, and I did
too, because it is not this.

Come on, Kevin.

I don't know if you're going for a Jerry
Maguire thing, but you complete me,

Taterade.

I'll report myself to HR.

I can't tell. How's the video doing?
Well, it's actually gotten a lot of

The unofficial fan site for the Geico
lizard retweeted it. But no one's signed

up yet. In school, we're forced to learn
history.

No one wants to do it for fun.

I guess the guild will go the way many
of its members did, neglected by their

caretakers.

Hey, two people just signed up.

Oliver Otto and Anna Cat Otto.

We saw how much it meant to you, so we
thought we'd give it a shot.

Thanks. I don't know what to say.

Come here.

You guys are not going to regret this.
We're having a mutton truck on Thursday.

It's just fried chicken, but we're
pretending.

Hey, how was the event?

I might have quit.

I'm not sure.

Okay.

Well, let me know so I can change the
family back to generic phone charger

cables.

You guys will not believe what happened
today. First, I want to apologize for

not supporting your dreams. If you don't
want to go to college and instead

pursue singing, that is fine with your
father and me.

It is?

Why do I always feel like I missed a
meeting?

No, I will go to college, but for music.

Miss Belt was telling me about all these
great music programs. Oh, and there's

this one at the school that's named
after a honeydew. Carnegie Mellon? Yes,

that's it.

She's going to do great in college.

It's nice to see Taylor pursuing her
passion and Greg sharing his passion

the kids. I'm passionate about two
things. My family and hating these

Westport idiots.

But there's got to be room for something
else.

Mom, why are you always nodding your
head, smiling and staring at us?

It creeps us out.

Oh, my.

Why do you have that look on your face?

You know what? I don't care. When you're
done, just clear the browser history.

What? No.

I was looking at the honeydew school
that Taylor wants to go to. It's a lot

expensive than community college.

Oh, my.

Right?

We played this wrong.

Should have just let her run off to L
.A.

In light of this, when you say you might
have quit your job, can you clarify

that? I didn't quit quit.

I quit in my mind.

Okay, what exactly does that mean? Like
most working Americans, my spirit has

quit, but my body is forced to attend.

No one wants you to follow your passion
more than me, and I'm just floating this

out there. How about you find the
profession that you're passionate about,

quit your job? Or hear me out.

Quit my job, hang out in Stewart and
Kingston, somebody comes in, likes my no

-nonsense attitude, gives me my own talk
show, boom! I'm the queen of daytime.

Where are you guys off to?

Our first historical guild meeting.

I'm very enthusiastic.

Oliver is less so.

It's mutton madness.

You sure you don't want to go?

No, I've got a lot of work to do.

But I thought you were quitting.

No. You're right.

I'm going to keep this job until I
figure out what I really want to do.

But I know what I really don't want to
do.

Go to your thing.

Bring me back some more chicken. We're
not supposed to call it that.