Original subtitles

Now, no one's coming to the hotel in this. I'm closing up for the night. And

starting my self -care wind down. Because Ben deserves it. And I'm going

watching TV. Because ghosts don't have to sleep.

You've mentioned many times.

Two.

One.

Huh.

One. This cab has been abandoned for 50 years.

And then he kissed me.

I'm telling you, there's something in here with us.

Abaddon? Esther?

Esther? I don't sleep.

I don't sleep.

Good night, Mom. Good night, Ben.

Mom,

is it morning?

Sorry. Good night, Esther.

Is it morning?

So, uh, what's in those pancakes?

Are you talking nutmeg or? Just, just cinnamon.

Oh, I loved cinnamon.

Hey, for this bite, when you taste the cinnamon, can you go, mmm, cinnamon.

Mom! Please join us.

Guys, I have exciting news.

Aunt Rose is coming to visit.

Ow. What's wrong with Aunt Rose?

Kathy, I'm an open -minded guy. I like everyone. I befriended ghosts that

their entire family. Why are families in truly unspeakable ways? Sorry, why?

Because I like everyone, except Aunt Rose.

Ugh, the woman is just mean. Her saying I have a weird lip is the whole reason I

have a mustache. She makes me rub her shoulders and then complains I'm not

it right. Then stop asking Aunt Rose.

Aunt Rose can be scrappy, but she's our family and we love her. Also, she's had

a tough life. Has she? I think I remember something about the dust bowl.

Ben, can I steal you away for a sec?

Totally. I just might have to be back soon to massage Aunt Rose.

Aunt Rose is coming? I wish I was dead like Uncle Nathan.

That's right.

I'm dead. I couldn't talk to her even if I wanted to, which I don't.

Being dead, you've done it again.

Well, like her or not, I could still use all of your... Great.

You know what? More Aunt Rose for me.

You're out of this.

You have a secret laboratory?

It's not like I can do black magic in the hotel. I mean, I can, but it didn't

work out for our brother.

What brother?

Right? So, I've got good news and bad news.

Ooh, I love good news.

Ah, but I really hate bad news. The good news is I brought a corpse back to

life.

The bad news is he attacked people for, like, no reason.

Dance now!

You raised the dead?

Ah, the amulet did most of the work. Esther, what do you even need a dead guy

for? Yeah, his name is Dan. Remember how I led a rebellion at lunch because they

discontinued chocolate milk? Oh, yeah. You put all the school mascot heads on

spikes. And cocoa powder in the air ducts. Anyway, the principal wants to

to a parent about my continual radical behavior.

And if I tell Mom, she'll ground me. But you know who won't? A corpse pretending

to be my dad.

At a certain point, just call Dad.

No. We only have a little bit of time to train Dan, and I need you to sit in as

the principal. Dan! Look, I'll call Dan right now. It's a two -hour drive.

Unless he moved again without telling us. Ben, I don't need Dan. I just need

to help Dan practice.

I'll do it if I can wear my old man makeup.

This will be fine.

Yes. Better than fine. Great.

Yes.

She's probably mellowed with age.

Yes.

Is that her?

Yeah, that's her. Coming!

Interesting.

Aunt Rose, welcome to the undervale. It's about time.

I was worried you'd leave me standing in this driveway until the sun went down

and wolves took me. Well, I'm here now. You look well.

Well, I'm not.

I have multiple maladies, and they are conspiring to destroy me.

If this cold air you left me in doesn't kill me first... Then let's get you

inside.

Ugh, she's worse than I remember.

She's fine. She's just old. Catherine!

Bring my bags inside before they're stolen!

That's a smart idea, Aunt Rose.

Okay, Dan.

We're going to go over this one more time. When we get in the room, you sit

the chair next to me. You don't attack anyone.

Then the principal talks.

You don't attack anyone. Then you nod your head, and you don't attack anyone.

Ben, how are you feeling? I'm pretty worried he's going to attack me again. I

just told him not to. Right. It's just you told him that last time, too? Yeah.

Ben, Dan's body isn't getting any fresher.

Mr.

Freeling, thank you for coming in. Can I offer you some scotch? This blend is

from the highlands.

Maybe being tied up is scaring him. Being tied up is keeping him from

me. Dan, don't kill Ben. Ben, if he kills you, I'll bring him back.

God, I just really think we should revisit the dad option.

We'll get it on the day.

What kind of business doesn't have stamps?

No, we have stamps, Aunt Rose. You just didn't like ours because they have

famous women in history on them. They all look so pleased with themselves.

This entire hotel is in shambles. I certainly wouldn't pay to spend the

here. Well, you didn't.

So what a deal!

I suppose you're doing your best.

It's your idiot brother who left you with this mess.

I don't know if that's fair to say.

But I'm sure your feelings are colored by a traumatic past.

I don't like to speak ill of the dead, but Nathan was an absolute failure from

birth to death.

You could make a more successful man out of a sack of beans. At least beans make

soup and they don't have a hideous mustache.

I drew that mustache because of a lip insecurity you gave me. Nathan, what

happened to hiding? I tried, Kathy. I stood idly by while this walking

for elder abuse assaulted my character. But a man has a limit. It's been 20

minutes. And it felt like 40. What's going on?

You made a ghost angry.

Feel free to run away screaming.

Or get uncomfortably close. How did this happen?

We don't know exactly.

But he's still Nathan. Nothing to be afraid of in this otherwise normal

Say the 20th century is better than the 18th century. Right after you meet my

friends, Lewis and Clark.

Normal, except when you die here, you become a ghost.

And there's a ghost

train.

Interesting.

Everyone knows you run this place. I said, are you dating anyone?

I got my wisdom teeth out an hour ago and they told me they used too much gas.

But you're the best guy I ever met.

Just go easy on the insurrection.

Only if you go easy on injustice.

She's a handful, but she's got a great dad.

Dad! We don't want to take any more of the principal's time, and he should

probably sleep off the gas.

Nancy, I'll be in my office, dancing with all these butterflies.

That was amazing!

So fun!

And the perfect appetizer to the entree of reburying Dan.

Ben, we can't bury Dan now. He's finally getting the hang of not attacking

anyone. Dan, you want to rent a car and go buy fireworks?

Dan!

I've taken pictures of everything and all these boxes have dye packs!

Kathy? Aunt Rose, this is...

Fun? What's going on?

I'm moving in so I can die here and become a ghost.

What? Okay, fellas, it's all going back in the truck.

It's okay if you break it. But you don't know when you're going to die. I mean,

it could be years.

Haven't you been listening? I'm a very sick woman.

Oh, you've been saying that forever.

And the doctors finally agree with me.

I have days left.

Careful with that ficus! I want it to die with me!

Kathy, this is all a really mean prank, right?

She's gonna be here forever.

Okay, Dan.

This is what we've trained for.

We actually haven't trained for this!

He may be dead, but he makes me feel alive.

He stinks up the room, but I think we'll survive.

His limbs fall off, but I'm pretty sure that's part of his clan. Oh, oh, oh, oh.

He's my man. He's just saying, Dad.

Shh, that's the good part. Dad.

What should we do next? Grow hot dogs, move along, play catch?

I'm not so sure he can play catch without a hand.

Dan, what happened to your hand, you goof?

Dan! Esther, some of us, me mostly, are growing increasingly concerned about the

emotional bond you're forming with this decaying man. What bond?

We're friends, and Dad's having fun.

You mean...

Dan's having fun. Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Professor.

No, come on. You know I don't like it when you do Mr. Professor. I didn't

realize it was a crime to misspeak in your classroom.

That's not... No, I'm raising a valid point. Don't fail me, Mr. Professor.

forget it.

Goddamn this inescapable prison.

You. You led me here, and yet... I propose a truce.

I shall call you Jarbon.

After the first man I ever tortured.

Oh.

Catherine! Catherine!

Catherine!

Stop it!

Can't stop! Won't stop!

Catherine! He's putting his buttocks on all my cardigans.

And I'm just getting started.

This butt talks is going everywhere.

The clown figurines, the knickknacks, the bathroom seashells. Don't you dare.

Nathan, what's your plan here? Oh, no plan.

Just a full -on tantrum that doesn't stop until she's gone. Out. This butt

is going to be the first thing you see in the morning and the last thing you

at night.

Kathy, you can't let this happen. Grab her by her bony shoulders and throw her

off the property. I can't do that.

I can't do that. You just won't. Can you imagine her as a ghost?

Walls are her only boundary. I know.

Okay? I mean, you think I want that bitter old fossil here for eternity?

I knew it! It rose!

No, no, no, no, no. We were just rehearsing for a play.

You always were a terrible liar.

Wait, where are you going?

I know when I'm not wanted.

I'll just go die in the street.

You're welcome.

Well, that worked out. Did it?

I mean, she's gonna die mad at us, but she'd have done that anyway.

No, I mean what she said.

I know when I'm not wanted. But she doesn't. She never has.

And why would she just leave without all her stuff?

You don't think.

She's going to hide here. What did you say? Sorry, what? I said she's going to

hide in here. Okay, you first.

Aunt Rose is hiding to die here. That's what I said.

Okay, Dan, get some rest.

Tomorrow I'm going to teach you to build me a treehouse. Dan!

Esther! Tussle my hair?

Sorry, Dan.

But I'm doing this for my sister.

Dan!

I was just trying to cut the chain!

Dan.

Wow,

that actually worked?

Look, you seem like a great corpse.

But you'll always be a corpse. And that's not what Esther needs.

You gotta go.

Dan.

Didn't you hear me? Get out of here. We don't want you anymore.

Oh, man, he forgot his foot.

Listen up, everyone. I don't like you and you don't like me, but none of us

my elderly aunt dying here, so... Wait, you don't like us?

Yeah, that's not really the point.

We like you.

You scream at me constantly.

Because I'm a scamp. I'm sorry.

How long have you not liked us? Nathan, can you take over?

Listen up. Our plan is a classic smoke and throw. Smoke her out and throw her.

want a sweep of the entire hotel inside and out. If you find her, do not try to

scare her on your own. She will criticize you. Let's bring her in.

Dogs and perverts came back empty. Oh, God, what if she's dead?

I saw her! I saw her, I did! Really? Where? You think I'm just gonna rub it?

may be brown bread, but I ain't a donkey.

Honey pie and mash.

Huh? It's Cockney slang.

I got this. Listen, son, a dustbin like you don't need sugar and honey. And

you're gonna be in Barney if you don't Murray.

This hotel is in New York.

She's in a sub -basement.

I've come to this.

A demon of the ancient world brought low by the technology of the new one.

Oh, we lose it all in the end, don't we, Jarbon?

You would abandon me to rot?

Yes!

Oh, Jarbon, you eight -legged genius.

Aunt Rose?

Aunt Rose?

If you're down here, please come out. I want to hear more about all the

neighbors you think are stealing your mail. If she's already been murdered

here, I'm going to be so ticked. Just keep following her footsteps.

What the hell?

Language.

Aunt Rose, you're not dead.

Don't sound so relieved.

You don't want me to be relieved that you're not dead? Not when I know you

want me to die.

I have half a mind to kill myself in front of you. Step over the property

and be my guest.

I expect this from him, but I thought you were better.

Clearly, I was wrong.

You're a bad person and a bad mother, and I don't like the way you... Shut

mouth. Kathy... No, no, I'm done with this. I have never been anything but

to you. I always send Christmas cards and call when I hear you're having oral

surgery, and when you storm out of family events, I walk you to the car to

sure you don't slip on the ice. Have you even noticed that no one else in the

family does that?

Everyone hates you, Aunt Rose. But I stuck around because I felt bad for you,

and you had such a hard childhood. No, I didn't.

Then why are you like this?

You're mean, Aunt Rose. And you need to leave my hotel now.

Fine. I didn't want to die in such a rude place anyway. Make sure she leaves

this time.

Give me space.

You're triggering my vertigo.

Listen, lady. I don't like this any more than you do.

Dead.

What are you supposed to be?

Well, are you going to move or do I have to pull out my whistle?

If anyone asks, we all saw her get on a covered wagon.

Dan, this isn't a good way to process rejection.

Where do you think that monster got all those shoes?

I did the right thing, right? I mean, I stood up to Aunt Rose.

And now she won't be a ghost here. This is good.

A zombie's going to kill Aunt Rose. What? You have a zombie?

Esther resurrected a dead guy to go to the parent -teacher conference, but then

instead of reburying him, she formed an unhealthy bond. So I freed him to make

him leave, but he came back and grabbed Dan Rose.

He also taught me to shave.

I mean, he shaved me. But I learned things.

You tried to get rid of Dan?

You had an unhealthy relationship.

And now so do we, because I'm never talking to you again.

Hey, hey, hey, hey. Which way did the zombie go?

We're almost there.

Jarbon, go on without me. Spin webs that grow heavy with flies.

Allies to the end.

Then let us be rid of this place.

Victory!

Pathetic doorstop, you are no match for the combined might of Abaddon and

Jarbon.

Chabon?

Chabon?

Chabon!

Are we sure he went this way? Looks like his arm did.

Somebody help!

I'm being taken by a decaying man!

Aunt Rose, I'm coming!

Dan! Aunt Rose! Does anyone else feel a weird... It's the

property line.

Uncle Nathan can't go past it. Which means Aunt Rose is off motel property.

Which means no turning into a ghost.

Problem solved.

I mean, as much as a woman being torn apart by a zombie counts as a problem

solved.

Kathy? I'll see you when we get back.

You're still going after her? Why?

Because I treat family better than she does.

God, I hope that's your zombie's leg. This way!

Wait! I see something over here!

Aunt Rose!

Are you okay?

Why? Are you going to send another man to finish me off if I'm not?

Oh. Aunt Rose!

You always were my favorite.

You know I'm Catherine, right?

You still have the necklace I gave you. This?

No, I've had this since... Your fifth birthday?

I knew you forgot.

I hope you'll remember me.

I'm getting you out of here.

God, you have hands like a Nebraskan potato farmer.

Please shut up.

Esther? Over here. I need light.

I mean, looking good, bud.

Honestly, what is the point of an amulet that raises the dead if you can't keep

their limbs attached?

Esther, maybe it's time.

No, I can fix him.

I know, but...

I worry you're using Dan as a stand -in for Dad.

Of course I am. I'm not dumb, Ben.

You know?

Then why not just call Dad?

I do call Dad. I call and I text and I send photos. And all he ever replies

is a thumbs up.

So yeah, raising a dead guy to be my dad was the easier option.

That doesn't make it a good option.

Yeah.

Okay.

Goodbye, Dan.

Want me to put on my old man makeup and give you a piggyback ride?

Yeah, why not?

Catherine, why are you hauling Aunt Rose back toward the hotel?

If she wants to be a ghost, she can be a ghost.

I know she has her flaws, but there's good in her. She got me this necklace.

Right, Aunt Rose?

Your mother told me she wanted to get it for you. I bought it before she could.

To make her feel like a bad mom.

Now she was always bad. She really was.

She would have been a ghost by now, right?

It's different for everyone.

Took me days.

What's happening? Where am I?

Hi, Aunt Rose.

Wait, did I die? Am I a ghost?

Ha! This is fantastic!

Look how high I can kick!

And you!

All I ever wanted was to see a look of absolute defeat on both of your faces,

and there it is!

It feels so... Wait,

what just happened?

I think her unfinished business was to know we'd be miserable forever.

We should probably call an ambulance.

Aunt Rose would have complained the lights were burning her retinas.

Now she's complaining to angels.

Or demons. Probably demons. Should I ask them about the zombie?

Seems pretty resolved to me.

This is nice.

Returning Dan to the Earth.

Hey, why is Abaddon burying a spider?

Because he was a hero.

It was nice to have a dad for a while. Maybe another dad will turn up. Dads

don't just turn up, Ben.

Ben! Esther!

You guys want to watch cartoons and drink soda while I tell you how things

better when I was a kid?

Yes! Coming!

Well, I reckon not everyone who dies in this old haunted hotel gets to stay.

But me, I'll be around here a while, playing the sheer guitar, peeking at

in the shower from behind the shampoo bottles.

Who are you? talking to. I don't got a skeet at him.

He scares off dogs, but he puts me at ease. He's terrifyingly strong. He threw

me into some trees.

He gives great hugs, and even though my brother isn't a fan. Oh, oh, oh, oh.

He's my Dan. He's my, he's my, he's my Dan.

He's my, he's my, he's my Dan.

He's my, he's my, he's my Ben.

He's my, he's my, he's my Ben.