Original subtitles

I know.

That's why it's fun.

Please, no!

Somebody help!

Esther, what's wrong?

Stabby, stabby!

Nothing. Just messing with a ghost.

Stabby, stabby.

What's that, your catchphrase? So dumb.

Esther, stop letting ghosts think they can kill you.

But that was really good acting.

Aww. I'd let you stop me if I could. Ben, you do not mean that.

He doesn't mean that.

Heads up, people. This is not a drill. Code yellow. No, wait. Blue.

Blue and some yellow. It's a code.

Nathan, slow down. What is it? Did you see a cool bird?

Was it a finch?

We have a guest.

This is not a drill! Ben, make sure we have fresh towels. Esther, wipe off the

bleeding mirror. Nathan, which is our least haunted room? Ooh, that's tricky.

There's actually a lot of ghost debate over who gets to haunt where they lived

versus where they died. Also, there's a... Help your uncle find a safe guest

room. Sir, yes, sir!

Abaddon out.

You dare command Abaddon, High Prince of the Black Realm, curse?

Descend it!

No prison can contain my power. This place open?

Absolutely. Welcome to the undervale. Sorry about the mess. Just inherited

hotel. Still getting it up and running.

Is that mirror bleeding?

That's mercury.

It's Napoleonic. Fancy. Then where are we on that room?

Still looking. Over.

Ghost. Different ghost.

Ghost orgy.

Boom. Found one.

Room 210 is clear.

Right. Jessica moved to 210.

Jessica, that's enough.

Jessica. Jessica.

False. He lied.

You guys really need to learn black magic.

Room 210 is clear. 210 it is. Please let me know if I can help you with any...

God damn it. Thanks. Oh, there is one thing.

That Johnny don't like his payments being light.

Was that Tony?

Oh, that dude's a ghost.

Technically a death day looper. Yeah, thank you, Nathan.

Hey, who called the cops?

Johnny, you son of a... Well,

it was a good practice run. If that had actually been a guest, I think they'd be

enjoying their stay right now.

Can you change the TV channel?

Not right now.

Got him! I did this!

Ma 'am.

This can't keep happening. Every time I think we might be okay, some ghost I

didn't even know about comes in and ruins everything.

Maybe you can use the ghost. Some of them are pretty good at my math

And some of them are pretty good at watching me pee.

It's fine.

I pee in the dark now. The solution is not more ghosts. It's no ghosts.

Are you still mad about Tony being a ghost and then shooting you and then

getting shot in the entryway?

We'll get a guest next time. Hell yeah, we will. Bad times, Debbie Paul.

Even if we get a guest, we'll still have ghosts, so next time someone might be

killed or possessed or fall in that bottomless pit in the garden.

It's not bottomless. I threw a rock down and something threw it back.

See, it's just a deep hole with something helpful at the bottom. It

kind eyes.

Stay away from the pit, Ben.

Catherine, you're new to the hospitality industry.

Take it from an old hand. Every hotel has issues.

Not like this. God, between the ghosts and no guests and Abaddon?

Uh, whoa.

What's wrong with Abaddon?

He's a demon trapped in the body of a little boy from the 1700s. This vessel

requires Froot Loops. It's Cheerios or nothing.

I'm sorry.

Next time I die, I'll leave someone else a huge hotel. It's a haunted hotel.

Yeah, and it doesn't love that term. That I don't know how you got. Card game

with a hooded stranger.

Where you're now trapped as a ghost with dozens of other ghosts. They're cool

once you get to know them. What more do you want?

Less of that.

This place only works if the living people make a living. So work with the

ghosts. A lot of them have business experience. A lot of them have murder

experience.

What's that?

My last resort.

An exorcist? She left a flyer last month.

This place has a reputation.

So do exorcists. And hiring one when your brother is a ghost is extremely

insensitive. What's insensitive is all the ghosts scaring away our guests. I

have to get rid of them for this place to have a shot.

Or you let me handle it.

Catherine, trust me. I'm your big bro. I've always looked out for you. You

locked me in a closet when I was three. Because you wouldn't stop playing with

my trains.

Give me one day. This is a communication problem between you and the ghost. I

can fix that.

How? Does it matter?

If it works, it's cheaper than an exorcist. Fine. You have one.

Really, Ezekiel?

In his defense, when he was alive, this hallway was a bathroom.

Man,

being kids in a haunted hotel.

Mama said there'd be days like this. Am I right?

What do you want? Wow, you are jumpy. You know what might help? A girlfriend.

I'm not comfortable talking to you about my love life.

Or lack thereof, as my bully says.

Then I'll do the talking. Her name is Annabelle. She was buried with a diamond

necklace somewhere near the hotel. She won't tell me where, but maybe she'd

a young sutor?

I don't know, sis. Flirting with a ghost to find her body, it all sounds

unethical. Lots of things sound unethical, Ben.

Anyway, she said you were cute.

I'm in.

I get the bones.

It's settled. Old ghosts will watch the living sleep on odd days. New ghosts get

even days.

You have town halls?

You're not supposed to be here. It's my hotel. I can be anywhere.

Just let me handle this.

It's Jabby Paul. Can I get a minute?

Boo, everyone.

Boo! You all know Catherine, my sister and the new, uh, owner.

She's having a little trouble getting guests. I'm not having trouble. You're

attacking them. Not successfully!

Doesn't matter. The point is, I thought we could give her some help using our

centuries of hotel expertise.

So let's go around, say our names, how we died, and one great hotel idea.

Who's first?

Yeah, I'm Angela, a .k .a. the hallway shrieker.

I fell out of an apple tree. I think I shriek because the boy eats a lot of

fruit. And when he does, it reminds me of my trauma.

Great. No fruit for Ben. Next.

I'm Doug. I drowned saving a kid in the river.

Liar! Okay, let's not get into this again. Anyone else? More wolves in the

hotel. And virgins.

Small town ones.

And always on TVs.

Always on TVs.

Lots of great thoughts.

We'll lose money on electricity, but we'll save on fruit. My turn. I thought

Nathan's plan would be terrible. None taken. So I came here with my own. Can

someone pass these out?

Ooh, bad start.

I'll post it somewhere. The point is, to avoid conflict between the living and

the dead, I've made a convenient map of the places you can and can't haunt.

Can, the attic, can't, the guest rooms, the hallways, the lobby, the dining

room, the garden, and this meeting room. So, let's all clear out. Meeting

adjourned.

Are they trying to scare me or is that regular booing? It's a bit of both. Boo!

New approach, stay in the attic or no TV.

Boo! You just used boo as a greeting.

At least be consistent.

Boo!

Fine, fine, no TV. I'm sorry, but... Boo!

Damn it, Jessica!

Jessica! Jessica!

So,

come here often? Often? I've been trapped in this stupid hotel for 90

watching the world move on while I'm basically frozen in time in a dress that

don't even like!

I'm 13.

Anyway, I'm Ben.

German.

I heard someone thinks I have a cute face.

Really? Who?

No one. I have bad information.

Bye -bye.

Oh, jeez. I'm sorry.

Let me just... No, wait. I haven't had anything new to read in 20 years.

Did I do that or did you do that?

We did that.

Benjamin.

I think we might be...

Soulmates.

Why are they moaning so much? I know like nine easier ways to get bones.

Catherine, we all said things or threw heads that we regret. But think about

progress we made for the next town hall.

Mom, mom, can I let my ghost girlfriend possess me to experience pleasure beyond

this physical realm? Girlfriend?

We just need Annabelle's body.

Annabelle? Isn't she 90?

She didn't die 90. I'm getting an exorcist.

Catherine, let's talk about this. You can't trust actresses. Says the ghost. I

tried talking. I was attacked and my children are seducing the dead to rob a

grave. Mom, our whole life has been you talking about how we need money.

I just wanted to help.

You're right. I forgot how hard this must be for you. I'm sorry.

Ben, Mom says you can date the ghost!

Right on time.

Okay, can you move, please? No.

I'll just reach through you. No, you won't. That's gross.

Why is that gross?

Why is it gross to reach through your brother?

This hotel has a darkness.

But it's a weak darkness.

Unreliable. You're good.

I'm Jez Merelda. May I come in?

Two hours alone and you haven't asked about her body?

It's been two hours?

Man, true love makes time fly.

True love, buddy!

You're not seducing her for love. You're seducing her to make me rich!

I had a whole day planned, you know. I was going to terrorize birds using the

bones that you were going to get me. The bones, the bones, I know. The thing is,

that was before I found out Annabelle and I are soulmates and I'm a soul

conduit. What?

What does that even mean?

Ben Ben, I'm done with this page.

I honestly don't know, but I love the female attention.

I'll ask about the body soon. Bye.

Unbelievable. I know a curse that will make him sleep for a thousand years.

Do you have a resume on her? I mean, what if she's just some crazy loner? Oh,

214, you don't want to go in there without... Candles.

I need more candles.

I'm glad you called.

Let's give me a hand.

How did you know this hotel was haunted?

This hotel has a dark history, Miss Freeling.

Murders, suicides, disappearances.

Before it was a hotel, this was an asylum.

Before that, a prison. Before that, a different asylum.

Evil is drawn to this place, and legend says these grounds hold one of the six

gates to hell.

Oh, and now we're a hell gate. Big surprise. Classic Exorcist upsell.

Damn it, Ezekiel. What did I tell you?

Bohemian!

How did you do that?

There's a logic to the supernatural misfeeling.

Ghosts have power over demons.

Demons over humans. And with the proper tools, humans hold dominion over ghosts.

Great, it's weird.

Rock, paper, scissors.

Now let him go.

Of course.

What the hell?

He is at peace.

He exploded.

Well, if you prefer, I have other methods. I could banish them to a lovely

netherworld beyond space and time.

A netherworld sounds great.

Excellent choice.

Oh, what an interesting mirror.

Catherine, you can't do this. As the hotel owner, I forbid it. But you're not

the owner anymore.

I'm doing this for us.

Closer, closer.

Come on, you candle -loving son of a bitch.

Run, Candlehead!

It's a trap!

No, away from the candle. The candle's obviously the trap.

Next.

That just leaves the

matter of... Hayden, any chance I could pay you with a ghost -free room?

I'm cash only.

And no, I meant the matter of the last ghosts.

Wait, Nathan?

No, no, no, no, no, no. I just wanted you to take the bad ghosts.

You saw how he was, how he fought us.

A ghost is a rip in the fabric of reality, Miss Freeling.

A passageway to the chaotic beyond.

Even one presence will expose your hotel to more dangerous threats.

It's your choice, order or chaos.

I do love order.

You love order?

Nathan! I'll be in my room. Let me know when you decide if I get to exist.

All right, time's up. Stop kissing.

Where is she? She's in the bathroom. You have to go.

Not until we have that body.

Wait, why is she in the bathroom?

I don't know. It felt weird to ask.

Ben! Corpse, diamond, riches.

Bones, ritual, apocalypse.

Huh? Nothing.

Fine, I'll ask about her body now, okay? Just please go.

Is that why you were with me?

Annabelle! You were using me for my body?

No, not at all. My sister used me to use you for your body, but what I felt

while being used was totally real. Enough living person lies.

I can't believe this is happening again.

Annabelle, please. Wait, I'm sorry, again?

Well, looks like you've got things to discuss. Just point us toward your grave

and we'll be out of your hair. That's right. You're not my first.

I let you lick my heart.

Nathan, I know you're in there. I can see your feet.

Obviously, I'm not sending you to some void.

Everything I'm doing here is for you.

Is it for me? Or is it because your life fell apart so you came to run your dead

brother's failing hotel?

I let you hold that stupid town hall. It's not stupid. It's a proud ghost

tradition. Oh, my God. What is your obsession with these ghosts?

They don't have you.

Without you.

I'd be the one stuck in an eternal void.

Well, that's not gonna happen.

You're my brother.

I know.

But I'm also one of them now.

And I can't abandon them and trap you.

So bye, sis.

No, no, no, no! Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

Bring him back!

Oh, I'm sorry, dear.

I'm afraid the transition is permanent.

I'll give you a moment.

The spirits are purged. Her eyes once more martyr.

Master of the land.

Chesperelda, what the hell is this? It is your doom.

Just give it a minute.

Soulmate, you're conduit.

You're a conduit.

I hope I never die so I don't have to see you again.

Okay, plan B, we just dig holes until we find a body.

Starting in here.

So, do chairs hate all tables or just that table? Oh, thank God. Are you guys

okay? Physically, yes.

Emotionally, I've got some work to do.

Run!

What's going on? There's a demon in the hotel.

There's a demon in the hotel?

Is he a treasure?

Is he friends with the sprout?

Help! Annabelle! I'm a hero!

Let go!

My son, go!

Poor little guy was probably just mad and I walked on him with shoes.

Wait, where's Uncle Nathan?

The exorcist put him in some kind of void. I have to get him out.

Are we going to fight a demon?

No, I don't even know how we could. The exorcist said rock, paper, scissors.

That's why she wanted the ghost gone.

Hide me. He's crazy.

Hide you?

You summoned him.

I know.

Wait. There's the loyalty.

Focus. Ghosts can fight demons, right? There must be a way to bring them all

back. From the netherworld?

I can't.

I would need a channeling tower or sacred blood or a conduit.

I'm a conduit. It's true.

We are dead.

Okay, we have a conduit. Now what? We use a summoning charm on him and beat

awful demon.

Go, humans.

Oh, great mortals.

I have gathered these mortals here that you might crush their heads more easily.

Are you kidding me? Oh, my God.

Mortos.

You came for me.

Uh, hey.

Do I know you? It's me. It's Abaddon from hell.

Oh, right.

Abaddon.

How's it going, man? Come on, man. You don't remember me?

Abaddon, the Cobra King, right?

Man, my castle's three doors down from yours. Three down from me is an acid

They tore down my castle?

Ben,

how do we use you? Thank you for asking.

No idea.

Seriously, you guys really need to learn black magic.

Is this going to feel like earlier? Because I'd really rather not do that in

front of my mom.

I know it's on.

Nathan?

Nathan, can you hear me?

Nathan? It's Catherine.

Catherine? Where are you? In the hotel. I'm outside, Ben.

Am I inside, Ben?

I think you may be depressed.

Just follow my voice. There must be a way out.

I think I found it.

I see you.

the hotel, we'll both be trapped.

That's not true. I mean, it sort of is, but it's a good trap. Like, family is a

trap, you know?

That's the best you can do?

I'm sorry. We've never been good at communicating.

But I want you to come back. I want all of you back.

Can ghosts use the main hallways?

Fine. And the TV in the lounge?

Within reason.

Well, what's that mean? I'm gonna need a specific commitment here.

Into the boy?

Into the boy!

Into the boy! Into the boy! Into the boy!

Any last words?

Rock, paper, ghost, bitch.

No, no, no, wait!

Stop that!

You're twisting my arm! I have an old torturing injury.

Sorry, what? I want to be with you forever.

I want to turn on every TV in the world for you. Always on TV.

Cute couple.

Bit of an age gap.

There's always other bodies.

Miss Catherine, I don't love your rules, but I like them better than an eternal

void. I'll try to stop stabbing. Wow, thank you, Stabby Paul. But I guess a

non -guest stabs are okay with me. So long as they're okay with the co -owner.

Wait, co -owner? As in two owners.

With equal power.

And I'm one of them. I definitely need the help.

I'm going to go stab the mailman.

Everyone, three boos for Catherine.

Boo! Boo!

Boo! You guys need to decide what boo means.

It's all about context.

See, in a group of four or more...