Original subtitles

Hey, Taylor. How about a cookie dinner?

I'm not kidding. It's so good.

Well, a little help from Chef Stouffer.

All right. I'll see you.

Hello, 911.

I'm on Central Boulevard. There's somebody following me. I don't know.

You don't answer my calls. Well, you scared the crap out of me. I'm trying to

talk to you. Hands on the car.

I'll kill you, moron. I'm a federal agent. What'd you call me? A moron. What

you, stupid and deaf?

You know this guy?

His name's Robert Hobb.

He's my ex -husband.

There once was a story about a man who could turn invisible.

I thought it was only a story.

Until it happened to me.

Okay, so here's how it works. There's this stuff called Quicksilver that can

bend light.

Some scientists made it into a synthetic gland, and that's where I came in.

See, I was facing life in prison, and they were looking for a human

So, we made a deal.

They put the gland in my brain, I walked free.

The operation was a success, but that's where everything started to go wrong.

Yes, sir. Can I help you with something?

Hello. I'm posting bail for Robert Hobbs.

Uh -huh. Okay.

Sign right here.

Sign here? Yeah.

I'll just be a minute.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Hi, I'm Viv Halpern. I'm Bobby Dex.

Are you a friend of his?

Uh, yeah. Well, you know, we work together.

I'm Darian Fox. Hey.

What happened?

He was following me.

Again. It happened a few years ago, but I talked to Zoloft to care of it. Wait a

minute. Are you... Are you telling me that he was stalking you?

Shepherding me.

It's more like it.

Bobby can get a little... Paranoid.

Paranoid.

You do work with him. I do.

Yeah. Is he still taking that medication?

Yeah. I mean, as far as I know, why?

The last time he went off of it, he became convinced that something bad was

going to happen to me. So he started following me to protect me.

Sounds like cops.

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, come on. He's obviously got some issues, but he's not

bad guy.

Issues? He's nuts.

I wasn't going to say that.

Look, I didn't want to have him arrested.

He mouthed off to the cops.

Sounds about right.

Listen, I need you to do me a favor. Sure.

Can you tell him that this has got to stop?

Like, for real. Like, he can't do this anymore.

Brock's a big guy, and if he sees him following me, it could get ugly.

Is he your new guy?

Yeah.

Yeah, actually, I should get him out of here before he sees Bobby. Yeah.

Yeah, well, I'll definitely try to call him up.

I really appreciate it. Sure, yeah.

Yeah, it was nice to meet you. Yeah, nice to meet you, too. Send Bobby, my

Definitely.

And tell him I never want to see him again.

Let me ask you something. Are you still taking the villa?

It's got nothing to do with it. What do you mean? I checked this guy out. He's

got a record, right?

Somebody's got to warn her she's getting too...

It's a... Bedwith.

Wait, wait, wait a minute. Are you telling me that you can't even say it?

I... Oh, I got it.

You're not worried about her safety. You're jealous.

Would you look at this? Look at his record. He's been brought up on charges

theft, grand theft, fraud.

Hobbs? He's a criminal. Hobbs filed 15 years old. He was a kid. Okay, look.

He was never even convicted.

Once a criminal, always a criminal.

A pawn doesn't change its scum.

Really? That's right.

Mm -hmm.

We're not talking about you right now, okay? We're talking about him. Yeah? And

what makes my pint any different?

The official would like a word with you, Mr. Hobbs.

Go get him.

You swore this would never happen again.

No one would touch you after your last meltdown.

And I gave you another shot. And I thank you for that, sir, because I was in

need of that, and I appreciate that. But this is different, because she's seeing

a guy. Who she's seeing is not your concern.

You're to stay away from both of them. Well, I understand, sir, but if you let

me... Shh!

Not another word.

Now, you repeat after me.

I will never go near my ex -wife or her new boyfriend again.

Well?

Sir, he said...

For me not to say another word, and if I did, that would be contradicting. Say

it.

I will, uh... Say what?

What I just told you. I will never be, uh... I will never go near... I will

never go near my ex -wife with her boyfriend.

All right. Okay.

Pops!

Uh, yes, sir? Yeah.

Come on, you didn't really think I was going to miss this, did you? That was

classic. Fox,

you keep your eye on him.

If he even drives into her zip code, I wouldn't know about it. So he's the

watchdog now? Woof, woof. Let's go.

Come over, Rover. I'll buy you lunch.

Why are we here?

No,

we're leaving. No.

He comes here every Tuesday with the same two guys. They make up what's a

lowlife and they make a bike.

I think it's drugs. I really do. Well, let me tell you something. You're

delusional, okay? The guy's a sailor, not a drug user.

You think I'm delusional?

Yes, I do.

Who's that? My grandmother?

Who?

I want to find out what's in the box. No, no, no. That ain't going to happen.

That ain't going to happen. You're staying right here.

Why don't you help me?

Do your disappearing act and go over there and look in the box. Why don't you

that? Hey, let me tell you something, okay? I am not a toy, okay?

You're my partner.

And partners do for each other. No, I am doing.

Why not do?

Come on.

You heard me.

You're not going.

No, you're not.

Excuse me, gentlemen.

Federal agent.

Federal agent, how you doing? I'm okay.

Nice to see you.

See what's in the box, please?

No.

It's just about... It's called harassment.

Now, why don't you just move along?

No, no, no. Let me get something straight here, Swabby. I tell you what

okay? You don't ever tell me what to do.

Ever. Like that?

Mm -hmm.

Good.

Now, let me see what's in the box.

You play games?

Huh?

Those are reconditioned spark plugs.

Do you want to see my receipt?

No. Keep it. It won't be necessary.

What will be necessary is for you to stay the hell away from me and Vivian.

Do you want to hit me?

Do you want to hit me? Go ahead, take a shot.

Go ahead, take your best shot.

Ah, ooh.

See, in your mind, you were thinking, maybe I'm going to hit this guy. You had

an idea.

Maybe I'm going to hit him, but maybe... Hey, come on, come on. Let's get out of

here. Come on.

Okay, let's go, Rocky.

You did this on purpose. I did not. He did. I did not. Did Till. Did not. They

did. Okay, I did. Serves you right. The guy didn't do anything wrong.

Guy's a criminal, folks.

Hey, sleeping with your ex -wife is not a criminal make.

They went on a few dates. Doesn't mean they were doing it. Of course they're

doing it. Because unlike you, they're adults.

And adults do it.

Sometimes they do it in the bedroom.

Sometimes they do it in the living room.

And sometimes they even do it on the kitchen table.

Stop it. I'm getting a mental image.

Hey, deal with it. Accept it and move on, okay? You're going to get us both in

trouble. And will you just stay here for a second?

Where are you going?

Will you just stay? Where are you going?

Where are you going?

Folks.

Where'd you go?

Who's that guy, Brock?

He's my girlfriend's ex -husband. The guy's a freak, but he's not a problem.

you say.

Then we should just kill the deal.

No, no, no. Kill it. Look, do you think that I want to go through with this if

it wasn't cool?

We're talking about 25 years in the brig.

Besides, it's the only chance we'll have.

Look, we can get 10K a unit on those guns.

How do we even know we can get a buyer?

Because... These aren't just regular guns.

Look, we deal them, we'll be selling those guns left and right.

It's cool.

Let's get out of here.

Let's go.

Back doors open. I got it.

Okay, when you spend time around a guy who keeps yelling, the sky is falling,

it's a real shocker when a piece of it actually hits you on the head.

But for once, Hobbs was right.

The guy's a thief.

The nav shot delivers with precision accuracy.

Each shell contains a thermal guidance system that locks onto the target,

the weapon a remarkable 97 % kill factor.

Now watch how the bullet speaks this heated target.

Very impressive.

I look forward to testing it in the field.

Break it down, put it back into lockup. Make sure there's some room in there

because we're going to be getting a batch of these in the box.

Yes, sir.

Maybe it was good.

You get a whole few of those, okay?

Okay, I got a hypothetical for you. All right, shoot.

All right, let's say, I don't know, somebody you work with is hung up on an

and let's say the ex has started seeing someone new.

A sailor, perhaps.

It's unbelievable. I mean, are there any secrets around this place?

He but filled me in. Listen, Hobbes' paranoia can be easily controlled with

right meds. No, he's not paranoid.

He's right.

The Navy guy's a bad egg.

What do you mean?

He's a thief.

It turns out he and his buddies are going to steal a load of guns. You know,

some kind of new weapon.

And do you know this how?

Right, you need a shot.

All right.

Did you tell Hobbs what you found out? What are you, nuts?

I mean, if Hobbs goes anywhere near Brock, he's a dead man.

Brock? The bad egg.

Right. I mean, if the official doesn't kill him, Brock will.

And see, the topper is.

If Hobbs finds out that he was right about this guy, I mean, come on.

They ain't gonna be not stopping that little tiger.

Right. Well, I think if the guy's a thief, you at least have to tell the

official. Right.

How do I do that without telling Hobbs?

I say you tell them both.

How can you do this?

I love you.

And I love your father. And we're getting married.

But before we walk down the aisle, there's something I have to tell you.

I'm pregnant.

And the baby's yours.

That bitch.

I'm sorry. Are we interrupting something here? No, no, no. We were just watching

CNN. Okay, look, we gotta talk.

Believe it or not, Hobbs isn't crazy.

You know this guy that his ex -wife is seeing? Well, he and his buddies are

planning a heist. It's a shipment of some kind of, like, thermal guided guns.

Told you he was pond scum.

How do you know this?

I spied on him.

I already do to stay away from him. No, no, no.

You ordered Hobbs to stay away from me. What do you complain about anyway? I

mean, I uncovered a plot to steal guns, huh? It's NCI's job to take care of

dirty sailors, not mine. It's your job to follow my orders.

That means you're to drop this. I don't want to hear anything more about this

sailor or these guns.

Sorry, it's called a gun. It's called a nab shot.

What? Nab shot.

This gun.

It's called nab shot.

Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you didn't want to hear anything more about it. That's

the second time he's done that. So you're giving out very confusing

Yeah. Yeah, it was called a nap shot.

It's a top -secret smart gun developed by the Pentagon to help ensure our

continued strategic dominance.

Very good, Ebert. That could be very good when every Tom dictator in Harry

one. This is fantastic. We nip this in the bud and the Appropriations Committee

will smile on us. It's not every day that something like this just falls into

our laps.

It didn't just fall in your lap there, pal, okay? I happen to have sniffed it

out, personally.

He's right.

Good work, Hobbs. Thank you. Take the rest of the week off.

That's a negative. This is my lead. If anybody's going to nail this G .I. Joe

guy, it's going to be me. No, no, you're too close to it.

When emotions get involved, people make mistakes.

You're asking me to stand by and watch? I'm not asking. Hey, hey, come on, you

guys. I mean, think about this. I mean, should we even be investigating this,

huh?

Technically, this is the purview of the Naval Criminal Investigation Service.

Legally, we are obligated to contact them with any investigations we conduct.

Let them sweep in and get all the glory.

Not a chance.

We need this more than they do.

I, well, I suppose if arrest was made off base, that could fall into our

jurisdiction.

Good, Ebert.

Did you hear when it was going down?

Absolutely. Sometime tomorrow.

Okay. I'll get a team together.

Can I go? No, you can't go.

If I'm not going, you're not going, Ebert.

Not this time, Ebert.

Ebert, she is.

Yes, I'll let him know.

Your ex -wife is downstairs.

She wants to see you.

Well, why don't you have them show her to my office?

Not worried about this to anyone.

Hello?

Brock told me what you did at the bar.

This has got to stop, okay? This is going to stop right now.

Just trying to look out for you, that's all. I don't want you to look out for

me. I want you out of my life. He's no good, Viv. I checked him out.

Where do you come off doing something like that? He's got a record. Did you

that? Did you know he's got a criminal record?

I'm not going to listen to one more word of this insanity.

You've got to listen to me. He's a criminal.

No, I don't got to listen to you.

This is it. This is over.

I am going to finish this off once and for all.

What are you doing with that?

Do you mind? We're trying to have a private conversation here.

What are you talking about? I mean, she was about to shoot you.

It's a taser gun. I was returning it to him.

Oops.

Bobby's idea of an anniversary present.

And while we're at it, the coconut ring you gave me in Bali.

The video of our wedding.

And last but not least, the autographed menu from Legoland.

Okay, that's it.

You are out of my life.

I'm just going to go, you know, do something.

Fine, I'm out of your life.

But you have got to stay away from this guy.

Bobby, Brock and I are getting married.

You what?

You heard me. You can't marry this guy.

Bobby, we love each other.

You're making a big mistake.

No, I learned from my mistake.

Steven, my boy, this brings back memories.

We almost nailed North and Poindexter in this thing like this in Monopoly.

It's great to be back in the game.

You know what?

I think I'm going to take a closer look here.

Crates, hit the guns in the same truck. Yeah, right. No fuzz, no buzz, no buzz.

Right, you stay with him. It's too soon to move in yet.

I got her, sir.

I got 50.

Scott Munson.

Dang number, Chief.

You want to stick around until they're safe and sound? No need. If you want to

head on back to the base, go ahead. Thank you.

Hey, guys, come on, you know. I'm

sitting here in the back of the truck with five cases of stolen weapons, you

know. What are we doing here?

I'm moving in.

Let's go, man.

Stop the truck.

Remain in the vehicle. Stop the truck.

Remain in the vehicle. What are we doing? We want it to pull over.

Join it.

No.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, guys, where do you think you're going?

Get him.

You think you can get away from Bobby Hobbs, huh?

Think again.

Federal agent, you're under arrest for arms theft.

You really are putz.

Naval Criminal Investigative Services.

I'm an undercover agent.

Congratulations. You just blew a case. I've been working for eight months.

It's not me. How is this person always an undercover agent? By contacting NCIS

like you should have. We are very, very sorry about this.

Agent Hobbs has been severely reprimanded.

That's all.

He just botched an eight -month investigation and suspended without pay.

not fair. It was your idea in the first place. This whole thing was your idea.

Shut up.

You don't exist. Hey, time out, okay? Why don't you just tell us what's going

here, okay?

Pratt & Munson have been stealing arms for over a year now.

Small -time stuff.

Light artillery, ammunition.

Most of it was stuff we rotted down there just to keep them in business.

What was the target?

A buyer named Mr. White.

We haven't been able to nail him yet because he usually buys through brokers.

We hoped that if we hung out a big enough carrot, he'd show up himself.

And the nab shot's the biggest carrot we got.

What's he gonna show?

I guess we'll never know, thanks to you.

Not necessarily.

Maybe you can still do this.

How? With Pratt and Munson in the brig?

This guy, Mr. White, he's never met your buddies, right?

Right, he doesn't know what they look like. All you need is two other guys.

It's too risky.

It's too risky, huh?

Yeah, so what's your choice? You don't move now, you blow the deal.

Then your eight months really is down the drain.

Hmm?

We messed it up.

Let us make it right.

Okay, but I called the shots.

Understood? Understood.

You're off suspension.

Something I gotta do first.

That's the house?

That's the house.

Okay, so, uh, can we go over this again?

Exactly, uh, what is it you want me to say? Just tell her I need to talk to

that's it. Two seconds.

Okay, um, and you can't do this, why? Because as soon as she sees me, she's

gonna slam the door in my face.

Yeah, well, I mean, not that this is the case, but what if she don't want to

talk to you?

That's exactly what I'm anticipating, which is why I brought you along, to

convince her. Well, I think I could convince the official of taking the

out of my head quicker, personally. Boss, can you just go over there and

convince her? I need two seconds. That's all. I'm counting on you.

Don't take no for an answer.

Hey, pussy puss. How you doing there?

Hi.

Hobbs wanted me to give you a message.

I don't want any messages.

Yeah, I think he knows that. I'm pretty sure that's why I'm here.

Well, then I don't want to talk to you either.

Hey, hey, hey, look.

Whatever it is, it's got to be pretty important. I mean, come on, the guy put

a coat and tie.

Bobby's in a tie?

And a coat.

This is really not a good time.

Not a good time. Gotcha.

Hey! You said it's not a good time!

I need two seconds just to talk to her and I'll leave.

Two seconds!

I said it's not a good time.

You know what? It's still not a good time.

Well, just tell her again. I'm not going anywhere until I talk to her. I need

two seconds.

One second.

Fine.

Fine. Fine. Yeah.

Hey, she's going to talk to you.

You'll be right there.

Told you this wasn't a good time.

So, this Brock character, he's all right?

He's all right, but I don't know if he's right for you.

Are you sure he's Mr. Right?

I know one thing.

You're not.

It's funny, all these years, I didn't mind going to bed alone, you know,

I figured it didn't hurt as much because I knew you were alone.

I'm not serious with anybody.

I still had a chance.

It's hard to give up a dream like that.

Hey, you know, if you want to talk about anything, we could do that.

No.

Let's just get this over with.

Where's your partner?

In the head. Be right up.

You ex -Navy?

Me? No, I'm Jarhead.

That was another lifetime.

From what Viv said, you've had a lot of them.

She said that?

Yeah.

She talk about me a lot.

One time would have been a lot. Yeah.

What'd she say?

It wasn't what she said. It was more the way she said it.

Did she tell you how nuts I was?

Yeah. All the time.

But it wasn't angry. It was more like something she missed.

Did she ever tell you what she feared the most?

Yeah, she used to say she was afraid of waking up in the morning knowing what

her whole day was going to be like.

Yeah.

Yeah, she said you were the perfect antidote for that.

She said that?

You weren't the easiest act to follow.

Gotta tell you, I'm a little disappointed not to see you two beating

out of each other. We were just getting through it. It's a good thing it came

along.

Okay, so this is how it goes down.

At 1500 hours, that payphone ring.

Agent Fox and myself will be waiting there.

That's not a regulation haircut.

Well, I guess I'll just have to keep my hat on. I told you I was calling the

shots. Fine, you want to call a timeout while I go find a barbershop? That's

cool.

You're as big an ass pain as your partner. Now believe me, once you get to

me, you'll find out much worse.

Have you got the merchandise?

I have a sample.

If you like what you see, we have them all, but we negotiate first.

Take the package and get in the cab. The fare and gratuity have been taken care

of. Who are we meeting?

An interested party.

So has Mr. White shown up?

I don't know.

But if we get there and they start shooting...

Assume they know you're not Munson and run.

Uh, hey, Brock.

You know I can handle this alone, right?

Not a chance.

While we're playing show and tell, Agent Hobbs will be waiting with the guns in

a squadron of combat -ready MPs in that garage.

Well, they're not shooting yet.

You are? They call me Mr. White.

I'm Seaman Oliver. I don't care about names. I care about guns. Now show me

you got.

So show me.

What's so special about this gun?

It's got a thermal guidance system.

Bullets block onto it, and they adjust their trajectory in flight.

Yeah, you see, with this puppy, it takes only one shot, and you never miss.

Why don't you borrow a gun from one of your pals?

Sorry?

All right.

Okay, see the red light down there?

Try it with that.

Did think so.

Not trying to thermal.

Hmm?

Hit me, D.

No, no, no. Aim to the right.

How many you got?

Five units.

How much?

Ten thousand each.

That's too much.

Not even the U .S. military has these weapons yet.

Yeah, think about it. You'd be the first kid on the block to have them.

Five each. Seven.

Done.

Let me see them. Not until we see the money.

Five.

Ten.

Fifteen.

Twenty. Twenty -five.

Thirty.

Thirty -five.

Gracias.

Now, where's my gun?

I'll be here in five minutes.

Yeah, we're ready for the delivery.

All right, where are we?

Dock five, warehouse thirty -nine. Dock five, warehouse thirty -nine.

Dock five, warehouse thirty -nine. We have ten minutes to take your positions

outside the warehouse.

We move out, you move in.

Sir.

Hey, go ahead. Are you the delivery boy? Yes, I am. I'm outside 39.

You want to open up?

We're not there. That was just the meeting place.

Okay, then where do I go?

Don't worry about that. Just move over.

Somebody else will take over from here.

You won't...

Why?

I appreciate being held at gunpoint. And less a necessity.

I show up at 39, your goon gets in the truck, takes me here.

Welcome.

How did the weapons come with you?

I brought everything that was in the truck.

And that is all.

So, shall we?

Maybe we shouldn't unload them ourselves.

I think we can handle it.

Nuh -uh. There's too many. We need help.

My men will unload them.

No, like I said, we can handle it. Don't worry about it. I'm not doing this. I

support it. Come on, Tucker. Can't you handle a little action?

Excuse me.

Seaman, don't talk to officers like that.

Oh, yeah?

How many gun -running officers do you know?

I'm sorry.

Something wrong?

Did anyone ever tell you to uncover and sign?

Uncover what?

Your hat.

Take it off. Oh, no, no.

Catch a cold easily.

Aye.

Since when does the Navy allow long hair like that?

Matenlo!

What does that mean? That's Spanish, right? She said kill them. Hey, hey,

wait a minute, wait a minute, okay?

Look, before you start killing people, I think you should know that we're

federal agents. I mean, do you have any idea what the penalty for killing a

federal agent is?

It's not good. It's not good at all. It's very bad. Death.

Muerte.

Look at me.

I mean, do you think I'm afraid of dying?

She's got a point there.

There's a whole lot of SPs out there. Yeah, well, you'd be better off if they

weren't here.

You know what? I got an idea, actually.

Excuse me.

Why don't you guys go ahead and take off? We'll stay here, you know?

Give you a start.

No harm, no foul. What do you say?

I'm afraid that's no longer an option.

Well, there's got to be some kind of deal we can make, because after all,

going to be surrounded.

Yes.

There is.

You tell the SP to leave, and we don't shoot you.

We keep you as collateral until we're out of here.

And then, we drop you off safe and sound.

That's good. Like we trust you on that.

Oye, imbécil.

Let's get something straight.

A thousand miles south of here, there's a country you probably never even heard

of that's having a revolution right now.

My people are losing.

I get them these guns. They're not losing anymore.

So I don't care whether you trust me or not.

You, get on the phone right now.

Tell the ESPYs to leave.

What if I don't?

Then you all die here.

I think it's about time. I was thinking that myself.

Yeah. Okay.

Hey, heads up!

At least that gun still has a couple of glitches, huh?

Well, yeah, well, I'm a lucky guy.

I'd say you're lucky.

We should have saved your sorry ass.

Saved my ass? You nearly got us killed.

You know what? I'm going to let you two have a moment.

Well, at least you can show a little gratitude. I'm tired.

Hey, you're leaning. Why don't I wound here?

Hey, uh, Brock wants to know how much longer you're gonna be. Till two seconds

after he's done stitching me up here.

Would you go a little lighter on that, please?

Well, it helps if you sit still. Would it help if I had a gun up your nose?

Miles, would you take it easy? Come on, the guy's just trying to help.

You know this guy?

No, I'm just talking to him for no reason.

What are you so pissed off about, anyway?

I saved the guy's life.

Yeah? Not such a bad thing, is it? There's an old Chinese proverb. You save

guy's life, he's your responsibility forever.

Have you ever heard of that? No, I've never heard of that proverb. Well, it

sounds Chinese, but lucky for you, Chris, your brother isn't Chinese. Oh, I

think you're going to be okay. Yeah, he may feel grateful and invite me over for

dinner or whatever.

You think he's going to invite you over for dinner? He might.

I wouldn't wait by your phone, though. Easy.

It's not good.

No, it's good. Maybe you didn't hear a bullet went through my shoulder.

I think you were grazed out. Well, it's still a bullet.

Would you watch it? It's okay. You didn't get shot. You got grazed. And I

you need to forget about this bride guy. It's easy for you to say. He's not

marrying your wife.

Ex -wife, Hobbs. Whatever.

Hey, will you say it?

Well... Ex -wife. Say it.

Say it.

What? Say it.

Say it. X, Y, Z.

Hey. Hey.

How are you?

Uh, Doc says that he's gonna be okay.

I'm going to get some coffee, all right? I'll see you guys in a little bit.

You got that look. What look?

The one where you want to say something, but you don't know how to say it.

Oh, that look.

Body. Sexy, isn't it?

I came to thank you.

Brock told me. He saved his life.

Oh, that was nothing.

With hardly nothing.

man, Bobby.

You're not so bad yourself.

Take care.

For the first time in a long time, actually.

Happy New Year.