Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,503 --> 00:00:04,738
Check out his laugh, though.
2
00:00:09,075 --> 00:00:13,246
- Mr. Ed is wild.
- Mr. Ed is the bomb, shoot!
3
00:00:13,346 --> 00:00:14,414
Hey, but, you know--
4
00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:16,549
Horse is a horse
is a horse of course.
5
00:00:19,386 --> 00:00:21,588
Hey, but look, look for real man
you know what I was wonderin'
6
00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:23,923
but don't tell nobody, okay?
7
00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:26,559
Was wonderin' if a horse
can really talk like that.
8
00:00:26,659 --> 00:00:28,661
You talk to Pam, don't you?
9
00:00:28,728 --> 00:00:31,231
- Yeah.
- Case closed.
10
00:00:33,833 --> 00:00:34,934
What you all talkin' about?
11
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:36,536
- Hey!
- What up, Tommy?
12
00:00:36,603 --> 00:00:38,104
Hey, 'sup, Big Tom?
13
00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:40,774
Comin' up in here lookin' like
a bald-head penguin.
14
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:42,842
Yeah, right.
15
00:00:42,909 --> 00:00:45,545
Oh, you know what, I need
to borrow your gold cufflinks.
16
00:00:45,612 --> 00:00:49,582
Pam and I are going to
a black-tie dinner for my job.
17
00:00:51,084 --> 00:00:52,452
Alright, so in other words
18
00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:54,954
you're all dressed up
with no place to go.
19
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:56,189
Aha-ha-ha.
20
00:00:56,256 --> 00:00:58,625
Come on, man. She's gon'
be here in a minute.
21
00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:00,126
Can I borrow
the cufflinks or what?
22
00:01:00,226 --> 00:01:03,029
Alright, I'mma let you
borrow my cufflinks, but..
23
00:01:03,096 --> 00:01:04,697
...y'all gotta
close your eyes I..
24
00:01:04,764 --> 00:01:06,966
...can't show you
where I keep my valuables.
25
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:08,568
Wait, what're you talkin' about?
26
00:01:08,635 --> 00:01:09,969
Are you serious? Man!
27
00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,771
Don't play us
like a bunch of stick-up kids.
28
00:01:11,871 --> 00:01:15,475
- Come on.
- No, man. We boys, man.
29
00:01:17,277 --> 00:01:19,646
Close your eyes.
30
00:01:23,783 --> 00:01:25,118
Alright.
31
00:01:35,995 --> 00:01:38,164
Alright, y'all seen that.
32
00:01:38,264 --> 00:01:40,333
Alright, y'all seen
my secret hiding place, huh?
33
00:01:40,433 --> 00:01:42,168
- Now I'mma have to cut you.
- Man, come on, hey, hey, hey.
34
00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:44,070
Come on, give me
the cufflinks, please.
35
00:01:44,137 --> 00:01:45,505
Alright, man.
36
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:46,739
- Hey, Cole.
- Huh?
37
00:01:46,806 --> 00:01:48,675
- Hold this, alright?
- Alright.
38
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:51,010
Hey, Tommy man.
Take care of my cufflinks, man.
39
00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:52,846
- Let me have these two.
- Alright, but take care of 'em.
40
00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:54,080
I'm tellin' you,
they're valuable.
41
00:01:54,147 --> 00:01:55,448
- Thank you.
- Hey, yo, yo, yo.
42
00:01:55,515 --> 00:01:56,616
What's this?
This looks important, man.
43
00:01:56,683 --> 00:01:57,951
What's this?
44
00:01:58,017 --> 00:02:00,854
Oh, that's, uh,
my marriage license, Cole.
45
00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:02,922
L-look, look, I know I didn't
make it to your weddin', man
46
00:02:02,989 --> 00:02:05,692
but, uh, Gina was
the bride, right?
47
00:02:07,193 --> 00:02:10,663
You figure that
all out by yourself?
48
00:02:10,763 --> 00:02:13,533
Yeah, um, and Pam was supposed
to be the witness, right?
49
00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:15,435
Cole, what is the problem, man?
50
00:02:15,502 --> 00:02:17,370
Well, look, look, look,
the problem is right here, man
51
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:20,039
Gina signed w-where the witness
was supposed to sign
52
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:24,511
and Pam signed where the bride
was supposed to sign.
53
00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:27,380
Let me see this.
54
00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:36,656
Alright. So-so-so they signed
in the wrong place.
55
00:02:36,723 --> 00:02:37,891
What's the big deal?
56
00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:39,559
Well, Martin, the big deal is
57
00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:41,361
according to this document
58
00:02:41,461 --> 00:02:44,831
you and Pam are husband
and wife.
59
00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:46,065
Dawg.
60
00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:28,942
Yo, this can't be right.
There must be a typo.
61
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:31,844
No, no, Martin, man, it's right
here in black and yellow, man
62
00:03:31,911 --> 00:03:34,948
you are legally married to Pam.
63
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:37,617
Congratulations, Martin.
64
00:03:37,717 --> 00:03:40,887
Man, please. Can't no man
be married to no donkey.
65
00:03:41,921 --> 00:03:43,289
Oh, that would be your donk..
66
00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:45,625
I mean y-your wife now.
67
00:03:52,932 --> 00:03:54,901
Ohh.
68
00:03:57,904 --> 00:03:59,739
What are you fools laughin' at?
69
00:04:01,441 --> 00:04:04,143
Hey, hey, Martin y-y-you
want me to tell her?
70
00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:07,113
Ain't nothin' to tell, Tommy.
71
00:04:07,213 --> 00:04:08,915
I don't know, man,
under these circumstances
72
00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:10,550
I really think she should know.
Excuse me.
73
00:04:10,617 --> 00:04:13,219
Can I see this? Thank you.
I'll give it back when done.
74
00:04:13,286 --> 00:04:14,721
U-uh, Pam, this here..
75
00:04:14,787 --> 00:04:17,490
i-is Martin and Gina's
marriage license.
76
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:18,558
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
77
00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:21,327
But l-look where you signed.
78
00:04:21,427 --> 00:04:23,263
Now look where Gina signed.
79
00:04:26,733 --> 00:04:28,735
Ouch!
80
00:04:28,801 --> 00:04:30,069
Wait!
81
00:04:30,136 --> 00:04:32,839
W-wh... i-i-it's just
a simple mistake.
82
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,807
You know what I'm sayin'?
It could easily be erased.
83
00:04:34,907 --> 00:04:36,409
- No, no, no.
- Give me an eraser!
84
00:04:36,476 --> 00:04:38,077
- Pam, Pam, come on, now.
- Just give me an eraser.
85
00:04:38,144 --> 00:04:39,912
- I need an eraser.
- Pam! Pamela!
86
00:04:39,979 --> 00:04:42,582
Hey, relax sweetheart.
It is written in pen, okay?
87
00:04:42,649 --> 00:04:44,951
Anyway, you can't mess
with a legal document.
88
00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:46,619
Oh, please,
please don't tell me
89
00:04:46,686 --> 00:04:49,355
this means what
I think it means.
90
00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:51,124
Oh.
91
00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:52,325
Please.
92
00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:56,429
Let me explain this to you
in Ebonics.
93
00:04:56,496 --> 00:04:58,364
You be married to Martin.
94
00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:09,709
I wonder how Gina's
gonna take this.
95
00:05:09,809 --> 00:05:11,644
Probably the same way
Pam took it.
96
00:05:11,711 --> 00:05:12,879
No she's not.
97
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:15,515
'Cause Gina ain't
gon' know about it.
98
00:05:15,615 --> 00:05:19,952
Marin, she's bound to find out
once Pam moves in.
99
00:05:20,019 --> 00:05:21,554
Shut up, Cole.
100
00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:23,556
Alright, Gina's under enough
pressure settin' up
101
00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:25,558
the office in LA.
102
00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:26,859
So, what you gon' do?
103
00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:28,628
I'mma get this
marriage license changed
104
00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:29,896
'cause if Gina finds out, man,
105
00:05:29,996 --> 00:05:31,631
my baby might not
never come back.
106
00:05:31,698 --> 00:05:33,032
Hold on. Wait, wait, wait,
come on.
107
00:05:33,132 --> 00:05:35,335
I-I just, I just
wanna wish you luck, okay.
108
00:05:35,401 --> 00:05:38,204
No, no, I'mma go, I'mma go now
109
00:05:38,304 --> 00:05:39,972
and wake up your-your wife.
110
00:05:40,039 --> 00:05:42,475
Pam. Pam, baby, come on.
111
00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:45,345
Pam. Oh, Pam!
112
00:05:45,411 --> 00:05:47,513
Man, let me try.
I'll wake her up.
113
00:05:47,580 --> 00:05:51,384
Uh... Scooby?
114
00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:56,022
Gravy train.
115
00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:58,825
Uh, chuck wagon.
116
00:06:00,493 --> 00:06:02,428
Snausages.
117
00:06:02,528 --> 00:06:06,432
'Oh, look, see, she's movin'
on Snausages, see?'
118
00:06:06,532 --> 00:06:08,067
- Hey, Cole?
- Yeah.
119
00:06:08,167 --> 00:06:10,269
Wanna go to a black-tie dinner?
120
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:13,206
Sure. But Tommy,
I-I can't fit that dress.
121
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:19,846
Pam, I found you
some aspirin, maybe..
122
00:06:19,912 --> 00:06:22,081
Pam?
123
00:06:22,181 --> 00:06:23,616
Where'd she go?
124
00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:25,618
Oh, my, oh, my God.
125
00:06:25,718 --> 00:06:28,888
Hey, Pam!
What're you doin' out here?
126
00:06:28,955 --> 00:06:30,857
- I'mma jump, Tommy.
- What?
127
00:06:30,923 --> 00:06:35,461
I can't live another second
being Mrs. Martin Payne.
128
00:06:35,561 --> 00:06:37,130
Come on, come on, Pam.
Come on, sweetheart.
129
00:06:37,230 --> 00:06:39,899
Don't you think you're
overreacting just a little bit?
130
00:06:39,966 --> 00:06:41,100
No!
131
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:43,903
Imagine if you
were married to Martin.
132
00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:45,471
Tommy, forget it!
133
00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:47,039
There's nothing
that you can say to me
134
00:06:47,106 --> 00:06:49,976
that can make me
change my mind.
135
00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:51,611
Hey, Pam.
136
00:06:51,711 --> 00:06:52,712
Denzel?
137
00:06:52,779 --> 00:06:55,214
Huh? Ah, Denzel.
138
00:06:56,749 --> 00:06:58,317
No, no, no.
139
00:06:58,418 --> 00:06:59,585
It ain't gon' work this time.
140
00:06:59,652 --> 00:07:01,821
'Cause this situation
is critical.
141
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:06,492
Okay, okay, okay, come on, Pam,
you can't jump, alright?
142
00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:08,895
Pam. Look, hey, hey,
hey, hey, Pam.
143
00:07:08,961 --> 00:07:10,496
What about that new
hairpiece, huh?
144
00:07:10,596 --> 00:07:12,999
You just bought that.
The hairpiece, Pam, come on.
145
00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:14,734
Huh?
146
00:07:14,801 --> 00:07:16,335
Yeah..
147
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:18,571
I-I-I did pay a grip
for this sucker.
148
00:07:18,638 --> 00:07:20,640
Yeah, you did.
149
00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:22,608
And you know, i-it's real
authentic hair, too.
150
00:07:22,675 --> 00:07:25,311
I can tell that, Pam,
and it's lovely, honey.
151
00:07:25,411 --> 00:07:26,813
It's absolutely beautiful,
so come on in here
152
00:07:26,913 --> 00:07:28,114
so we can talk about it
153
00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:30,349
and you can stop
acting crazy, come on.
154
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:31,784
- Alright.
- Alright?
155
00:07:31,851 --> 00:07:33,519
- That's a girl.
- But it's only for my hair.
156
00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:35,354
I know. Now, now come on,
you and your hair.
157
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:37,190
Come on in here.
Oh, watch your hair.
158
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:39,759
There we go. There we go.
There we go.
159
00:07:39,826 --> 00:07:41,427
- Watch my stockings.
- I got you, baby.
160
00:07:41,494 --> 00:07:43,196
- Don't rip 'em.
- You're fine.
161
00:07:43,296 --> 00:07:45,198
Lord knows you're fine.
Oh, come on.
162
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:46,532
- Over here. Sit down.
- I think I'm sick.
163
00:07:46,632 --> 00:07:48,100
No, no, no.
You're gonna be okay.
164
00:07:48,167 --> 00:07:49,602
You're gonna be okay.
Just sit over here and relax.
165
00:07:49,669 --> 00:07:50,937
- Okay. Okay.
- Get comfortable.
166
00:07:51,003 --> 00:07:52,638
- There you go. Don't worry.
- Okay.
167
00:07:52,705 --> 00:07:54,874
Alright, good. Martin went down
for the license viewer.
168
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:56,642
He's gonna get all this mess
all straightened out
169
00:07:56,709 --> 00:07:58,978
and it'll be over
before you know it, okay?
170
00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:00,880
You sure everything's
gonna be okay, Tommy?
171
00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:02,682
No, no, big daddy's positive.
172
00:08:02,782 --> 00:08:03,716
- Okay?
- Okay.
173
00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:05,885
Everything's gonna be just fine.
174
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:08,187
Just fine...unless of course,
you know
175
00:08:08,287 --> 00:08:10,623
Martin wants you to perform
your wifely duties.
176
00:08:10,690 --> 00:08:12,725
- I'm out! I'm out!
- No, no, no, no.
177
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:19,665
Come on, Pam.
Hey, hey, relax!
178
00:08:19,732 --> 00:08:22,001
Alright?
179
00:08:22,068 --> 00:08:24,871
Look, Pam... Come on, now.
180
00:08:24,971 --> 00:08:26,539
You gonna have to cut this out
and just relax
181
00:08:26,639 --> 00:08:29,008
and calm down, alright?
182
00:08:29,075 --> 00:08:31,377
Tommy, just imagine.
183
00:08:31,477 --> 00:08:34,413
Me, Pamela James
184
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,216
being married to... to..
185
00:08:37,316 --> 00:08:39,085
Hey, come on, come on, come on.
186
00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:40,653
- What?
- Come on, you're gonna choke.
187
00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,424
It's alright. It's okay.
188
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:46,926
It's alright.
189
00:08:47,994 --> 00:08:49,262
You know, Pam..
190
00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:51,364
...I really
don't have to imagine
191
00:08:51,430 --> 00:08:54,100
you being married to Martin,
'cause..
192
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:56,402
...you are married to Martin.
193
00:08:56,502 --> 00:08:57,770
No, no, I didn't mean that.
194
00:09:01,207 --> 00:09:03,242
This don't make no damn sense.
195
00:09:03,342 --> 00:09:05,444
Six weeks to change
a marriage license?
196
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:09,849
Man, I got the draws
faster than that.
197
00:09:09,916 --> 00:09:11,417
Well, that's what you get
for gettin' married
198
00:09:11,517 --> 00:09:13,286
on that island
in the first place, man.
199
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:14,921
But six weeks, Cole?
200
00:09:15,021 --> 00:09:18,457
Man, Pam could've had
101 Dalmatians by then, man.
201
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:20,126
Alright, Martin, look,
just stop, just stop, alright?
202
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:23,796
Just chill out and try
not to think about it, okay?
203
00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:25,464
Oh, I'm trying, Cole.
204
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:28,801
But I'm married to Pam.
I can't believe it!
205
00:09:31,537 --> 00:09:33,439
As I dream on..
206
00:09:39,545 --> 00:09:42,882
- Martin, is that you?
- Yeah, Pam.
207
00:09:42,949 --> 00:09:46,152
Oh, I'm so happy
my husband is home.
208
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:47,987
I'm happy to be home.
209
00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:50,089
- Hi, baby.
- Hey.
210
00:09:50,156 --> 00:09:53,326
Can you do me a little favor
and give me a hand?
211
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:55,962
Yeah, anything for you, baby.
What's that?
212
00:09:56,062 --> 00:09:57,496
Thank you, boo.
213
00:09:57,597 --> 00:10:00,166
Could you help me shave my back?
214
00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:10,109
- Martin.
- Cole.
215
00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,280
Pa-pack your stuff.
We're gettin' out of here.
216
00:10:14,347 --> 00:10:16,015
Uh, okay, well
where are we goin'?
217
00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:19,185
Back to the island. I'm gettin'
out of this marriage now.
218
00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:24,657
'Tommy, are you sure this is the
island where Martin and Gina
219
00:10:24,757 --> 00:10:26,359
'got married, 'cause it don't
look familiar.'
220
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:27,793
'That's cause you were
never here, fool.'
221
00:10:27,860 --> 00:10:29,862
'You missed the wedding.'
222
00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:36,302
'Alright, watch yourself.
Be careful.'
223
00:10:36,369 --> 00:10:38,971
- Girl, go put some clothes on.
- How you doin', sweetheart?
224
00:10:39,038 --> 00:10:40,373
Aloha.
225
00:10:41,540 --> 00:10:42,775
Wait a minute, wait a minute
226
00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:44,377
this don't hardly look
like no courthouse.
227
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,112
Wait a minute, according
to the map, this is..
228
00:10:46,178 --> 00:10:47,546
Yeah, this is definitely
the place.
229
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,148
Yeah, well, let's hurry up
and find this judge
230
00:10:49,215 --> 00:10:50,716
so we can get outta here.
231
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:52,818
And I could free Willy May.
232
00:10:58,190 --> 00:11:00,059
- Hello, ladies.
- Hi, how are you doin'?
233
00:11:00,159 --> 00:11:03,329
- Gesundheit. Yeah.
- Mm-mm-mm!
234
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:05,398
Nothin' like a couple
of healthy island girls.
235
00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:07,833
- Excuse me, y'all.
- Oh, I'mma go with Cole.
236
00:11:07,900 --> 00:11:09,368
Keep him out of trouble,
you know?
237
00:11:09,468 --> 00:11:10,369
Just relax.
238
00:11:10,469 --> 00:11:11,904
You tell him to watch himself.
239
00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:13,806
- You watch yourself, okay?
- No, you watch yourself.
240
00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:16,809
I'm tryin' to get
this marriage annulled.
241
00:11:16,876 --> 00:11:19,912
All rise.
242
00:11:20,012 --> 00:11:23,482
For the right Reverend Justice
243
00:11:23,549 --> 00:11:28,187
Leon Lonnie Love.
244
00:11:34,493 --> 00:11:36,662
Here comes the judge.
245
00:11:36,729 --> 00:11:39,265
Pam, ain't that your crooked
back-slidin'
246
00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:41,600
go sell it on the mountain
cousin?
247
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,703
'Yeah, but he ain't no judge.'
248
00:11:43,769 --> 00:11:45,838
- He's a Reverend.
- No, I got news for you.
249
00:11:45,905 --> 00:11:47,907
He ain't no Reverend either.
250
00:11:48,007 --> 00:11:50,943
Yeah, the last time I saw Lonnie
was when county jail
251
00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:53,079
accidentally let him out.
252
00:11:53,179 --> 00:11:55,614
Accidentally let him out?
He escaped.
253
00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:58,350
- I saw it on "Cops."
- Really?
254
00:11:58,417 --> 00:12:02,888
- Who's first?
- Mr. and Mrs. Ho, Your Honor.
255
00:12:04,690 --> 00:12:06,459
Now, it says here
256
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,528
that you think that Mrs. Ho
has been unfaithful.
257
00:12:09,595 --> 00:12:11,731
What makes you say that?
258
00:12:11,797 --> 00:12:16,435
Because she said,
"Harry, I've been unfaithful."
259
00:12:16,535 --> 00:12:19,238
I see.
Do you still love your husband?
260
00:12:19,305 --> 00:12:21,207
Oh, with all my heart,
Your Honor.
261
00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,543
Oh, excuse me.
262
00:12:26,545 --> 00:12:28,881
Hello.
263
00:12:28,948 --> 00:12:30,783
Hi, baby.
264
00:12:30,883 --> 00:12:33,753
Oh, later tonight is good.
265
00:12:33,819 --> 00:12:37,456
Okay, see you then, boo-boo.
266
00:12:38,891 --> 00:12:41,327
What? That was my sister.
267
00:12:41,427 --> 00:12:44,296
Sister my ass! That's another
one of her boyfriends.
268
00:12:44,396 --> 00:12:46,999
Wait, wait, wait hold on, now.
Hold on, Mr. Ho.
269
00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:49,668
Now, although she may
have dipped her toe
270
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:51,971
in the river of sin,
there's no reason
271
00:12:52,071 --> 00:12:53,839
to throw the baby out
with the bath water.
272
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:55,241
Divorce denied.
273
00:12:55,307 --> 00:13:00,112
You can pay my girl
your court cost as you leave.
274
00:13:00,179 --> 00:13:02,348
Oh, my, my, my, my, my.
275
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:06,118
That Ho sure look good to me.
276
00:13:06,185 --> 00:13:09,822
Get thee behind me, Satan!
277
00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:13,959
Next case.
278
00:13:14,026 --> 00:13:16,762
- Over with it, please.
- Leon Lonnie Love.
279
00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:18,864
You ain't changed a bit, man.
280
00:13:18,964 --> 00:13:23,202
Is that my kissin' cousin on my
mama's side thrice removed?
281
00:13:23,302 --> 00:13:26,205
Yes, it's me. What're you up to
this time, Lonnie?
282
00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:29,875
Girl, all I know is that the
Lord done grabbed ahold of me
283
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:31,710
and shook me like a tree.
284
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:36,282
And the Reverend Leon Lonnie
Love turned over a new leaf.
285
00:13:36,348 --> 00:13:39,451
Besides, they ain't got
no expedition law.
286
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:46,292
And the native
let me be a judge. Ha!
287
00:13:46,358 --> 00:13:48,160
Look here, Lonnie,
we got a little problem,
288
00:13:48,227 --> 00:13:50,729
a little situation we need you
to help us get out of, alright?
289
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,565
Oh, whoa, wait, wait,
you decided not to marry
290
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:54,567
that big-headed girl?
291
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:56,869
Nah, man, I did marry
the big-headed girl.
292
00:13:56,969 --> 00:14:01,407
Oh, no, no, no, no, see, it say
here that you're married to Pam.
293
00:14:01,507 --> 00:14:04,176
- That's the problem, man.
- Oh, ain't no problem.
294
00:14:04,243 --> 00:14:07,913
- Welcome to the family, cuz.
- Whoa, hey! Hold up, no!
295
00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:10,916
Slow your roll, Lonnie. See
the marriage license is wrong.
296
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:13,052
See, me and Gina signed
in the wrong places.
297
00:14:13,152 --> 00:14:14,854
All we need you to do
is change it.
298
00:14:14,920 --> 00:14:17,089
Oh, I'm sorry, cousin, I can't
do nothin' for you there.
299
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:20,092
See, what the Lord
has brought together
300
00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:21,327
can no man put aside.
301
00:14:21,393 --> 00:14:22,761
- Martin tell him.
- Man, man.
302
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,363
Man, you don't change
this marriage license
303
00:14:24,430 --> 00:14:26,065
I'mma put you six feet under,
man.
304
00:14:26,165 --> 00:14:27,566
Well, I'm sorry, my brother
305
00:14:27,666 --> 00:14:31,403
but I answer to a higher power.
306
00:14:31,503 --> 00:14:33,706
Okay. Alright, alright. Okay.
307
00:14:35,107 --> 00:14:36,775
How high are we talkin, huh?
308
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:39,378
Huh, Leon Lonnie Love, huh?
309
00:14:39,445 --> 00:14:41,714
Talking Grant, Franklin.
310
00:14:41,780 --> 00:14:43,082
Huh, what we talkin'?
311
00:14:43,182 --> 00:14:46,418
Well, now, if I was still
livin' that foul life
312
00:14:46,518 --> 00:14:49,955
I'd be talkin' Franklin.
But I'm not.
313
00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:51,523
Oh, now, come on, cuz.
314
00:14:51,590 --> 00:14:53,926
This is... You gotta help us
out, this was all a mistake.
315
00:14:54,026 --> 00:14:57,062
Oh, no, no, no.
Lord don't make no mistakes.
316
00:14:57,129 --> 00:14:59,131
- Request denied.
- What?
317
00:14:59,231 --> 00:15:00,799
Lunch time.
318
00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:02,568
You better do somethin'
about this.
319
00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:04,203
Man, man..
320
00:15:04,270 --> 00:15:06,772
Can you bring me over
the baby back ribs
321
00:15:06,872 --> 00:15:09,608
mustard greens on the side,
Harry on hot sauce?
322
00:15:12,378 --> 00:15:15,147
Man, lunch time, man? Man, man,
you're gonna solve this case.
323
00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:16,482
- Really.
- Mr. Payne!
324
00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:19,818
- You are out of order!
- No, no, no, no, no.
325
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:21,954
You're out of order
326
00:15:22,054 --> 00:15:26,125
this whole court
is out of order!
327
00:15:26,225 --> 00:15:28,160
- Get off me man!
- Bailiff, bailiff, bailiff!
328
00:15:28,260 --> 00:15:29,762
- All you need to do is sign.
- Pay for these coconut!
329
00:15:29,828 --> 00:15:31,430
- I ain't signin'.
- All you need to do is sign.
330
00:15:34,333 --> 00:15:37,770
This is crazy.
This is really, really crazy.
331
00:15:37,836 --> 00:15:41,840
I fly all this way with
Harold Muppet and the Bluenotes
332
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:45,177
and I still can't get
out of this marriage.
333
00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:48,514
Needn't worry. We gettin' out
of this marriage, alright?
334
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:51,517
'Cause when Lonnie gets back,
I'mma whoop his happy ass.
335
00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:53,652
Okay, violence is not
gonna solve the problem.
336
00:15:53,752 --> 00:15:56,455
Yeah, yeah, don't do that, man,
why don't you just beat him up?
337
00:15:56,522 --> 00:15:58,691
Cole, you just shut up, please?
338
00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,859
'You make no sense at all.'
339
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:04,196
Well, well, well. Aloha!
340
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:05,798
Excuse me, y'all.
341
00:16:05,864 --> 00:16:08,934
I'mma go have myself
Kahlua with Kalani.
342
00:16:11,470 --> 00:16:13,038
Yeah, that fool keep followin'
them women around
343
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:15,607
they gonna throw his butt
in the volcano.
344
00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:20,279
You know what?
This is all your fault.
345
00:16:20,346 --> 00:16:22,314
If you hadn't signed
your paw print
346
00:16:22,381 --> 00:16:25,684
in the wrong place,
we wouldn't be in this mess.
347
00:16:25,784 --> 00:16:28,053
Well, if Gina would've listened
to me in the first place
348
00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:31,156
and never married you, we
wouldn't be in this mess either.
349
00:16:31,223 --> 00:16:34,226
Hey.. Aw, damn!
350
00:16:34,326 --> 00:16:36,895
Well, at least we not
married anymore.
351
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:39,398
Yeah, but I ain't married
to Gina no more either.
352
00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:43,569
You got yourself to blame,
Strawberry shortcake.
353
00:16:43,669 --> 00:16:45,204
Give me. Give me this, Martin.
354
00:16:45,304 --> 00:16:48,040
- Playin' all the time.
- See this?
355
00:16:48,140 --> 00:16:49,975
- Tommy, what are you doin'?
- What the hell are you doin'?
356
00:16:50,042 --> 00:16:52,077
Hey, hey, hey, think about it,
Martin. Think about it, man.
357
00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:53,412
If you tell the judge
358
00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:55,214
that your marriage license
was destroyed
359
00:16:55,314 --> 00:16:56,582
and give you another one,
but this time
360
00:16:56,682 --> 00:17:00,252
Pam, make sure you sign
on the witness line.
361
00:17:03,222 --> 00:17:05,324
I get it,
then I won't be married
362
00:17:05,391 --> 00:17:06,892
to Dick Van Tyke anymore.
363
00:17:06,992 --> 00:17:08,360
Yeah, yeah, I get it, too.
364
00:17:08,427 --> 00:17:12,531
Then I won't be married
to the notorious P-I-G anymore.
365
00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:24,276
Oh, you again?
Now look, I dine told you.
366
00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:27,780
I can't let you
out this marriage now.
367
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:31,116
Now, just what part of "No"
don't you understand?
368
00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:33,519
No, no, no.
You got it wrong, Lonnie.
369
00:17:33,585 --> 00:17:36,455
Uh, w-w-we're happy
being married.
370
00:17:36,555 --> 00:17:39,725
Look, we had a little accident
man, alright?
371
00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:42,628
Pammy goat here got hungry
and ate the license.
372
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:44,563
- Why do you always have to--
- So, we need another license.
373
00:17:44,630 --> 00:17:45,864
That's right,
we need another one.
374
00:17:45,931 --> 00:17:47,299
- Oh, is that all?
- Yeah.
375
00:17:47,399 --> 00:17:49,535
Well, here you go.
376
00:17:49,601 --> 00:17:50,636
Oh, no, no, no, no wait.
377
00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:52,204
Don't forget to sign it, Lonnie.
378
00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:55,407
Oh, no. I can't sign it
unless I actually marry y'all.
379
00:17:55,474 --> 00:17:58,143
Oh, hell no!
380
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,548
Wait a minute, guys.
381
00:18:02,614 --> 00:18:05,050
Listen, the ceremony
doesn't mean anything.
382
00:18:05,117 --> 00:18:07,886
As long as Pam signs
on the witness line
383
00:18:07,953 --> 00:18:10,155
you two are not married.
384
00:18:10,255 --> 00:18:11,623
- Okay?
- This better work.
385
00:18:11,723 --> 00:18:16,128
- This better work.
- I do. But make it quick.
386
00:18:16,228 --> 00:18:19,631
No, somethin' funky up in here.
387
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:24,336
No, no, that's just
Pam's breath, alright?
388
00:18:24,436 --> 00:18:25,904
- Why don't you shut up?
- Okay alright, alright.
389
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:31,310
You know what, I ain't convinced
that y'all really in love.
390
00:18:31,410 --> 00:18:34,113
And if I'm not convinced,
I know the Lord ain't convinced.
391
00:18:34,179 --> 00:18:37,916
which means, this is a union
born of Beelzebub.
392
00:18:37,983 --> 00:18:40,686
Oh, no, no, no.
Not at all, Your Honor.
393
00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,020
They-they're very much in love
394
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:44,857
in fact, they're crazy
about one another.
395
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,693
Well, y'all gonna have
to prove it to me.
396
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:49,094
- Prove it to you?
- Mm-hmm.
397
00:18:49,161 --> 00:18:50,462
See, let me demonstrate.
398
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:52,431
When you're in love
with a beautiful woman
399
00:18:52,498 --> 00:18:57,035
like this here, you gotta put
your arms around her.
400
00:18:57,136 --> 00:19:00,606
So you can be fruitful
and multiply.
401
00:19:02,274 --> 00:19:05,310
If you don't back off your
stinkin' behind off of me
402
00:19:05,377 --> 00:19:08,814
you're gonna see the Lord
and savior personally.
403
00:19:08,881 --> 00:19:11,016
That's right, that's right.
We are cousins.
404
00:19:11,116 --> 00:19:14,887
which, by the way, don't mean
a damn thing on this island.
405
00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:16,321
So you can get it, girl.
406
00:19:16,388 --> 00:19:17,856
If you're not gonna
show me the love
407
00:19:17,956 --> 00:19:20,492
at least you can
show your man some.
408
00:19:25,230 --> 00:19:27,633
Alright. See? See!
409
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:34,306
Now, Martin,
tell your woman she beautiful.
410
00:19:37,342 --> 00:19:38,911
I would, if I could get
past the fur.
411
00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:40,078
- Okay, okay.
- See?
412
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:43,248
No, no, no, no.
413
00:19:43,348 --> 00:19:44,583
No, Your Honor,
they ain't fighting, you know
414
00:19:44,683 --> 00:19:46,585
they joke like this
all the time.
415
00:19:46,685 --> 00:19:48,086
Now, you know a sense of humor
416
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,355
is very important
in any marriage.
417
00:19:50,422 --> 00:19:53,392
But I'm still
not feelin' the fire.
418
00:19:53,492 --> 00:19:56,828
Martin, go on
and bust some slobs.
419
00:19:56,895 --> 00:19:59,231
Give her some sugar, man!
420
00:19:59,331 --> 00:20:01,433
I gotta bust some slob
with her, Leon?
421
00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:03,602
Go on, man.
Give her some sugar.
422
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:05,671
Give her a little sugar.
423
00:20:05,737 --> 00:20:07,105
Alright.
424
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:10,175
I was saving these for the ducky
ride back to the airport
425
00:20:10,242 --> 00:20:12,077
but, uh..
426
00:20:12,177 --> 00:20:14,613
In this case, in this situation,
you can have them now.
427
00:20:14,713 --> 00:20:16,415
You're so stupid.
428
00:20:16,515 --> 00:20:20,018
I'm still waitin' for that kiss.
429
00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:26,391
- Okay.
- You can do it, you can do it.
430
00:20:26,458 --> 00:20:32,397
- Here we go.
- Hail Mary!
431
00:20:36,134 --> 00:20:38,303
'That's beautiful, man.'
432
00:20:38,403 --> 00:20:39,738
See what I'm tellin' you.
433
00:20:39,805 --> 00:20:42,774
- Love will do that to you.
- Oh!
434
00:20:42,874 --> 00:20:45,277
That's all I was lookin' for.
435
00:20:45,377 --> 00:20:46,712
Now, come on,
you young people
436
00:20:46,778 --> 00:20:49,748
let's kick this ceremony off
correct.
437
00:20:49,815 --> 00:20:52,918
Pam, do you take this man to be
your lawfully wedded husband?
438
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:54,086
I do.
439
00:20:54,152 --> 00:20:55,821
Martin, do you take this woman
440
00:20:55,921 --> 00:20:57,656
to be your lawfully wedded wife?
441
00:20:57,756 --> 00:20:58,757
I do.
442
00:20:58,824 --> 00:21:01,126
By the powers vested in me
443
00:21:01,226 --> 00:21:03,328
by the island of Quackahowa
444
00:21:03,428 --> 00:21:06,665
I now pronounce you
man and wife.
445
00:21:06,765 --> 00:21:08,667
- There we go.
- Sign the thing.
446
00:21:08,767 --> 00:21:10,269
Sign the thing. Alright.
447
00:21:10,335 --> 00:21:12,638
Now have I mentioned
that it's normal
448
00:21:12,738 --> 00:21:14,506
to make a little contribution
449
00:21:14,606 --> 00:21:17,009
to the Reverend Love
Scholarship Fund
450
00:21:17,109 --> 00:21:19,311
for wayward island girls?
451
00:21:19,411 --> 00:21:22,514
Yeah. Yeah, I'mma make
a nice donation.
452
00:21:22,614 --> 00:21:25,317
And it's, uh, it's a size nine!
453
00:21:37,262 --> 00:21:38,997
- Hey, hey, Martin.
- The watch. Get the watch.
454
00:21:39,097 --> 00:21:40,832
Get the watch.
455
00:21:44,102 --> 00:21:45,337
- Wait.
- What, what, what, what.
456
00:21:45,437 --> 00:21:47,372
I think this is the part
where I faint.
457
00:21:47,472 --> 00:21:50,142
What? No. Come on, Pam,
walk, baby.
458
00:21:50,208 --> 00:21:52,611
Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk.
459
00:21:52,678 --> 00:21:53,845
Come on, come on.
460
00:21:53,945 --> 00:21:55,380
Pam, come on. Wake up, girl.
461
00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:56,815
Hold on.
Come here, come here.
462
00:21:56,882 --> 00:21:59,217
- Let me try that line again.
- Okay.
463
00:21:59,318 --> 00:22:01,353
I hated the actin' on that one.
34569
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.