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1
00:00:02,402 --> 00:00:04,804
Pam, I can't believe it, only
three days till the wedding.
2
00:00:04,871 --> 00:00:06,840
I just feel like everything
is gonna be perfect.
3
00:00:06,906 --> 00:00:09,042
It is, girl. It is.
4
00:00:09,142 --> 00:00:11,211
- Would you get that for me?
- Sure.
5
00:00:13,313 --> 00:00:14,681
Hit it!
6
00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:47,414
Jerome, what are you
doin' here, man?
7
00:00:47,514 --> 00:00:50,283
Oh, wow, hold on,
slow your roll there
8
00:00:50,383 --> 00:00:51,751
junk in the trunk
9
00:00:51,851 --> 00:00:54,554
speed bump rump.
10
00:00:54,621 --> 00:00:58,058
Can I takes a peek?
11
00:00:58,124 --> 00:01:01,261
Now, word on the street is
12
00:01:01,361 --> 00:01:03,196
Redbones and big mouth
13
00:01:03,263 --> 00:01:04,631
stopped shackin' up.
14
00:01:04,731 --> 00:01:05,899
And you're gettin' hitched.
15
00:01:05,965 --> 00:01:07,967
Is it true what they say,
Redbone?
16
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:12,472
- Is it true what they say?
- Yes, Jerome, and..
17
00:01:12,572 --> 00:01:14,607
So, what's the matter?
18
00:01:14,707 --> 00:01:18,378
You can't call nobody?
19
00:01:18,445 --> 00:01:20,947
Where's my invite,
Mellow Yellow?
20
00:01:21,047 --> 00:01:24,651
Uh, uh, yeah I-I didn't know
where to send it.
21
00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:25,985
Well, don't stress.
22
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:28,254
'Cause Romey Romey
ain't got no address.
23
00:01:29,622 --> 00:01:32,258
Well, is there anything else
that you want?
24
00:01:32,325 --> 00:01:36,129
Yes, there is,
but not with you, Red.
25
00:01:36,229 --> 00:01:37,764
Look at you.
26
00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:39,132
If you wanna get with a winner
27
00:01:39,232 --> 00:01:41,668
why don't you drop
that bonehead chicken dinner
28
00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:43,269
won't you drop him!
29
00:01:43,336 --> 00:01:44,938
What do you mean
by that, Jerome?
30
00:01:45,004 --> 00:01:46,573
What do you mean what I mean?
31
00:01:46,639 --> 00:01:47,907
I'm talkin' about me and you
32
00:01:47,974 --> 00:01:50,977
doin' the double
ring thing, junk.
33
00:01:51,077 --> 00:01:52,679
Look, after-after Gina
34
00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:55,348
a-a-and big ears
stroll down the aisle
35
00:01:55,448 --> 00:01:57,951
me and you just slide
on in right behind 'em.
36
00:01:58,017 --> 00:01:59,419
I do. Yes I'll marry her.
37
00:01:59,486 --> 00:02:03,623
Sure I do. I'll make the base,
I'll make the ride.
38
00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:05,458
You see what I'm sayin'?
What I'm sayin'.
39
00:02:05,525 --> 00:02:06,526
Jerome, mm-mmm.
40
00:02:06,626 --> 00:02:09,028
Okay, look, I even wrote
my own vows.
41
00:02:09,128 --> 00:02:10,530
Would anyone like to hear 'em?
42
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:13,166
- Not particularly.
- Would you like to hear 'em?
43
00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:14,868
Please hear the vows
that I've written.
44
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:17,170
Alright, Jerome. Fine.
45
00:02:17,270 --> 00:02:18,538
Alright.
46
00:02:18,638 --> 00:02:21,941
Okay, I'd say in these vows
47
00:02:22,008 --> 00:02:25,345
that I promise to love
48
00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:29,516
honor, obey
49
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:32,352
and hit it twice everyday.
50
00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:35,788
Even four times on Sunday.
51
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:17,363
What do you mean
you can't do my hair?
52
00:03:17,430 --> 00:03:20,233
I can't walk down the aisle
like this.
53
00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:21,834
You're booked up?
54
00:03:21,901 --> 00:03:25,038
Look, please, I do not care
about a convention, okay, lady?
55
00:03:25,104 --> 00:03:26,940
I need somebody...hello.
56
00:03:28,174 --> 00:03:30,743
She hung up on me.
Everything is going bad.
57
00:03:30,843 --> 00:03:32,445
Just calm down, Gina.
58
00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:33,746
You know what,
I think I could hook you up.
59
00:03:33,846 --> 00:03:36,249
No, no, no, don't touch me.
60
00:03:36,349 --> 00:03:38,718
I need a professional, okay?
61
00:03:38,785 --> 00:03:40,286
And I think I know where to go.
62
00:03:40,386 --> 00:03:42,589
No, no. Don't tell me
you gonna ask Shanaynay.
63
00:03:42,689 --> 00:03:44,123
I ain't got no place else to go.
64
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:46,226
Oh, you are desperate.
65
00:03:46,292 --> 00:03:48,027
Rosko.
66
00:03:48,094 --> 00:03:49,529
Baby, what's wrong?
67
00:03:50,863 --> 00:03:53,633
Is it true that-that
you're gettin' married?
68
00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:56,236
Oh, baby. Yeah.
69
00:03:56,302 --> 00:03:58,204
What's up?
What's wrong with you?
70
00:03:58,271 --> 00:04:00,240
You love him?
71
00:04:01,808 --> 00:04:04,110
Yes, booby, I love him. I do.
72
00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:06,813
- You happy?
- I'm happy.
73
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,815
But we'll still
be friends, sweetheart.
74
00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:11,618
We'll always be friends.
75
00:04:11,718 --> 00:04:13,586
My mama told me.
76
00:04:13,653 --> 00:04:16,589
It just came as a... shock.
77
00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:18,324
Rosko, you could always
come over
78
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,727
you know you come over
uninvited all the time.
79
00:04:20,793 --> 00:04:22,495
You could still do that.
80
00:04:22,595 --> 00:04:25,565
Can I ask a favor?
81
00:04:25,632 --> 00:04:28,768
Wh-wh-what do you want?
You can have it.
82
00:04:28,835 --> 00:04:30,436
Have my baby.
83
00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:32,839
What?
84
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,774
I-I'm drinkin' a lot of milk
85
00:04:34,841 --> 00:04:36,442
and I'm growin' everyday.
86
00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:38,444
Boy, you ain't growin'
in the right places
87
00:04:38,511 --> 00:04:40,113
Just get off my door.
88
00:04:40,179 --> 00:04:42,015
- Just get away from me.
- But I love you.
89
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,516
- And I just wanna be with you.
- Obsessed little creature!
90
00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:45,852
Get away. You gon' help me
or somethin'?
91
00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:48,121
Get-get off my..
92
00:04:48,187 --> 00:04:49,188
I love you.
93
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,591
...door! Get off my door.
94
00:04:51,658 --> 00:04:54,093
I can't even go out there
to get my hair done now.
95
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:56,362
Rosko's not finished.
96
00:04:58,431 --> 00:05:01,367
And you will see me again.
97
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:03,202
Later... later.
98
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,204
Yep, this is gonna be the worst!
99
00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:06,205
Later.
100
00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:12,045
Oh, no, see,
but you don't understand.
101
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:15,815
See, Shanynay just invented
three new weaves. Okay?
102
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:18,051
Now this one is the
"You must got some
103
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:20,887
Indian in your family" weave.
104
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:24,324
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
girl, that is bad.
105
00:05:24,390 --> 00:05:25,325
- You like that?
- Mm-hmm.
106
00:05:25,391 --> 00:05:27,894
Good, good.
107
00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:30,330
Now, this one here
108
00:05:30,396 --> 00:05:33,566
is the "Your man just got
his check" wave.
109
00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:36,135
Ooh, gonna make Deandre
buy me this one.
110
00:05:36,202 --> 00:05:39,872
And so what you do is wear that
to like promotions
111
00:05:39,972 --> 00:05:42,342
special events, that kind..
112
00:05:42,408 --> 00:05:44,510
Hold up, okay?
113
00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:46,412
If I did not get there yet
114
00:05:46,512 --> 00:05:48,514
then wait till I get there.
115
00:05:51,317 --> 00:05:53,052
- Who that?
- I mean that's just rude.
116
00:05:53,152 --> 00:05:54,654
Can't nobody get to the door
no faster
117
00:05:54,721 --> 00:05:58,491
than J could get there.
118
00:05:58,558 --> 00:06:00,259
- ...knock.
- 'Mm-mmm'
119
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:02,261
- I'm sorry.
- Oh.
120
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:05,264
Well, lookie, lookie,
lookie, lookie.
121
00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,266
If it ain't Stinky
122
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,569
and the little rascal.
123
00:06:13,573 --> 00:06:17,176
Shanaynay look. I-I don't know
how to ask you this, okay?
124
00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:18,745
Look, Shanaynay,
we need our hair
125
00:06:18,845 --> 00:06:20,413
and our nails done
for the weddin', okay?
126
00:06:20,513 --> 00:06:21,881
Nobody else in town can do it.
127
00:06:21,948 --> 00:06:23,916
- They're booked.
- Hold-hold on. Wait a minute.
128
00:06:24,016 --> 00:06:25,418
Hold on, I didn't even
get an invite
129
00:06:25,518 --> 00:06:27,887
to to your little wedding, okay?
130
00:06:27,954 --> 00:06:29,455
And so you're just gonna
come up here
131
00:06:29,555 --> 00:06:30,923
and ask me to do your hairs.
132
00:06:31,023 --> 00:06:36,896
No, you must be
out your damn mind.
133
00:06:36,963 --> 00:06:39,732
- Oh.
- A-a-alright!
134
00:06:39,799 --> 00:06:42,435
W-would you like to come?
135
00:06:44,871 --> 00:06:47,774
- Yeah.
- No, that's not the way th..
136
00:06:47,874 --> 00:06:50,977
D-did all your other guests
get invitations like that.
137
00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:53,546
Did they get invited like that?
138
00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:55,982
Shanaynay wants to be invited..
139
00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:59,118
... a little nicer.
140
00:06:59,218 --> 00:07:01,120
I wanna be invited
a little nicer.
141
00:07:01,220 --> 00:07:03,322
Just invite her nicely.
Just do it.
142
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:06,492
Alright, Shanaynay, Shanaynay.
143
00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:10,563
Would you please...grace
144
00:07:10,630 --> 00:07:13,833
your presence at my wedding?
145
00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:15,935
That would be nice..
146
00:07:16,002 --> 00:07:18,137
...for you to come.
147
00:07:18,237 --> 00:07:21,107
Sorry, but I can't.
148
00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:23,643
I can't make it.
149
00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:25,845
Your invitation is too late.
150
00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:27,513
Did not come quick enough.
151
00:07:27,613 --> 00:07:29,348
Put a stamp on it in the mail
152
00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:30,783
and leave it in the mailbox
153
00:07:30,850 --> 00:07:33,186
'Cause it did not come
quick enough.
154
00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:35,354
I would come,
but I'mma be at the Detroit
155
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:38,191
toe-nail decorating
competition, okay?
156
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:42,261
Look, Shanaynay, just-just do us
this favor, alright?
157
00:07:42,328 --> 00:07:43,930
No, you know why?
158
00:07:43,996 --> 00:07:46,966
Because you never
really tell Shnaynay
159
00:07:47,033 --> 00:07:48,801
how good I am.
160
00:07:48,868 --> 00:07:50,369
How good am I?
161
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:51,871
I said how good am I?
162
00:07:51,971 --> 00:07:54,373
You know it's very hard for me
to do these things.
163
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:55,708
- Alright, alright.
- Come on.
164
00:07:55,808 --> 00:07:58,277
- Say it!
- Okay, Shanaynay!
165
00:07:58,344 --> 00:08:02,815
You're the best hairstylist
in the whole wide world.
166
00:08:02,882 --> 00:08:05,518
Aww. Wow!
167
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:10,857
Thank you, excuse me, excuse me,
excuse me, excuse me.
168
00:08:10,957 --> 00:08:12,124
Y-you really are.
169
00:08:12,191 --> 00:08:13,860
Turn around let me look under..
170
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:15,228
- Ugh.
- Please.
171
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,029
Wh- I mean you couldn't
perm that down first
172
00:08:17,129 --> 00:08:19,131
before you asked me to come
over here and do it?
173
00:08:19,198 --> 00:08:22,235
Okay, alright, uh. Well,
what is it that you want then?
174
00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:23,903
I mean do you want a jheri curl?
175
00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:26,005
- Uh, afro puffs, what, Gina?
- No, no.
176
00:08:26,072 --> 00:08:27,974
I need somethin' really flashy
and I need somethin'
177
00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:29,876
really special
for my wedding day, okay?
178
00:08:29,976 --> 00:08:33,813
Shanaynay, just do Gina's hair
and do my nails
179
00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:35,681
and don't mess us up.
180
00:08:35,748 --> 00:08:37,650
Don't be threatenin' me.
181
00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:40,253
Because can't nobody mess you up
182
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:43,322
mother nature already did that.
183
00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:47,994
Voila.
184
00:08:48,060 --> 00:08:51,898
I mean, all done.
185
00:08:51,998 --> 00:08:53,766
- Are you sure?
- Uh-uh.
186
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:55,735
You gon' let her get married
lookin' like that?
187
00:08:55,835 --> 00:08:58,704
What, what do I look like..
188
00:08:58,771 --> 00:09:02,275
Oh, my God. It's beautiful!
189
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:05,011
Shanaynay, this is beautiful!
190
00:09:05,077 --> 00:09:07,280
Well, it is all alright
191
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:10,349
considerin' who's head it's on.
192
00:09:10,416 --> 00:09:12,451
Thank you so much, girl,
I really appreciate it.
193
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,787
- You are so sweet.
- Wait, wait a minute.
194
00:09:14,887 --> 00:09:17,056
Don't you think you're
oversteppin' your bounds?
195
00:09:17,123 --> 00:09:19,892
Don't get dropped, okay?
196
00:09:19,959 --> 00:09:23,195
Be at your wedding with none
of these, none of these.
197
00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:27,233
Hey, hey, come on in.
198
00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:29,302
Now, hurry up,
hurry up, come on in
199
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,203
before somebody decides to..
200
00:09:31,270 --> 00:09:32,538
Okay, let me find a..
201
00:09:32,605 --> 00:09:34,240
- Excuse me, Excuse me.
- Gina.
202
00:09:34,307 --> 00:09:36,776
- Yeah.
- Who are all these people?
203
00:09:36,876 --> 00:09:38,744
Oh, my God.
204
00:09:38,811 --> 00:09:39,979
These are all
Martin's relatives.
205
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:41,414
There are no more hotel rooms
206
00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:43,249
because of some stupid
convention, so..
207
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,051
We'll sleep in the car
if we have to
208
00:09:45,117 --> 00:09:46,786
but we're definitely
aren't stayin' in here.
209
00:09:46,886 --> 00:09:49,455
- Yes, w-we'll find some place.
- No, you guys.
210
00:09:49,555 --> 00:09:51,424
- I'll find a place.
- No, no, no, this is a--
211
00:09:51,490 --> 00:09:54,293
Whoa. Oh, dang!
212
00:09:54,393 --> 00:09:56,329
Mr. Waters and Mrs. waters.
213
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:57,663
Hello, excuse me.
214
00:09:57,763 --> 00:09:59,165
- Uh, uh, baby.
- What?
215
00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:01,100
Damn. All your relatives?
216
00:10:01,167 --> 00:10:02,468
I don't know
any of these people.
217
00:10:02,568 --> 00:10:03,936
I thought they were
your family.
218
00:10:04,003 --> 00:10:06,672
My family? I don't know
none of these people.
219
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:08,674
Ain't no kin to me.
220
00:10:11,243 --> 00:10:13,412
Well ain't no kin to me, babe.
I'll find out. Hold on.
221
00:10:13,479 --> 00:10:15,915
Partner! Whoa, whoa, whoa,
partner, partner, man.
222
00:10:15,982 --> 00:10:17,283
- Who are you?
- Hey, now.
223
00:10:17,350 --> 00:10:18,618
We's the big country Paynes.
224
00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:20,820
Now we got some ham hocks,
some pig feet.
225
00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:22,321
Now, you'll never go
to nobody's house
226
00:10:22,421 --> 00:10:24,190
without bringin' 'em somethin'.
227
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:26,592
And we are
the Motherland Payne.
228
00:10:26,659 --> 00:10:29,195
Is this the only bathroom
you've got?
229
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:31,631
Oh, oh, you mean to tell me
230
00:10:31,697 --> 00:10:34,433
they don't have no bathrooms on
the plane from the motherland?
231
00:10:34,500 --> 00:10:37,303
No. And the flight was 18 hours.
232
00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:40,706
But don't worry, we brought
our own incense.
233
00:10:40,806 --> 00:10:42,375
Look, look, just handle your
business, man.
234
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:46,045
Alright? J-just do what you
gotta do. Whatever.
235
00:10:46,145 --> 00:10:48,481
Got this.
236
00:10:48,547 --> 00:10:49,548
- Sonny.
- Whassup, cuz?
237
00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:50,783
- How you doin', dawg?
- Hey!
238
00:10:57,156 --> 00:10:58,324
- Alright.
- Okay.
239
00:10:58,391 --> 00:11:01,360
Alright, Sonny,
don't start it. Be cool.
240
00:11:01,460 --> 00:11:02,695
- I was just lookin'.
- Okay.
241
00:11:07,733 --> 00:11:10,403
- Gina? Baby, this is crazy.
- Yeah.
242
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:12,471
I thought we were gonna have
a small weddin', baby.
243
00:11:12,538 --> 00:11:16,075
Your mama invited
every Payne in the world, okay?
244
00:11:16,175 --> 00:11:19,211
You don't see any of my family
sittin' up in here.
245
00:11:19,311 --> 00:11:21,747
Compton Payne's
in the hiz-house.
246
00:11:23,983 --> 00:11:25,818
You know what?
It's time to get to steppin'.
247
00:11:25,885 --> 00:11:27,753
- We gotta get to steppin'.
- Fine, I'm outta here.
248
00:11:27,853 --> 00:11:30,256
- We outta here.
- Bye, have fun.
249
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,692
Hey, y'all can have the cri-zib.
250
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:44,003
Eddy Murphy!
That's Eddy Murphy, baby.
251
00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:46,539
Hey, I just loved you
in "Coming to Africa"
252
00:11:52,011 --> 00:11:55,614
Gina, if one more uninvited
person comes up
253
00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:57,750
to our family dinner,
baby, I'm goin' off.
254
00:11:57,850 --> 00:11:59,385
Baby, just be nice, okay?
255
00:11:59,452 --> 00:12:01,053
- It's almost over.
- But I'm tryin'.
256
00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:02,955
Anyway, where's your mother?
257
00:12:03,055 --> 00:12:07,026
Uh, s-she couldn't make it.
She had to get her car fixed.
258
00:12:07,093 --> 00:12:08,461
Martin, she doesn't have a car.
259
00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:11,130
Alright, Gina, baby.
She don't like you.
260
00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:12,932
Cousin, JT and his two wives
just rolled into town.
261
00:12:13,032 --> 00:12:14,400
Is it alright
if they come to the party?
262
00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:18,037
No. No, no,
l-let me restate that.
263
00:12:18,104 --> 00:12:19,271
Hell no!
264
00:12:19,371 --> 00:12:22,141
Martin says it's alright.
Come in, man.
265
00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:24,443
Thanks a lot, Martin,
you know your television show
266
00:12:24,543 --> 00:12:26,312
is sure enough
the word on the street.
267
00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:28,481
Watch your dinner.
Let's go, ladies.
268
00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:34,320
Excuse me, excuse me
269
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:37,223
can I have everybody's
attention please?
270
00:12:37,289 --> 00:12:38,758
I'd like to propose a toast
271
00:12:38,824 --> 00:12:40,292
to my best friend Gina.
272
00:12:40,392 --> 00:12:41,594
Aww.
273
00:12:41,660 --> 00:12:44,396
May tomorrow be the happiest day
of your life.
274
00:12:44,463 --> 00:12:46,098
- And to Martin.
- Yeah.
275
00:12:46,165 --> 00:12:48,667
Try not to show up
so she can enjoy it.
276
00:12:50,803 --> 00:12:52,271
Oh, y'all cold.
277
00:12:52,338 --> 00:12:53,839
- Clink, clink, baby.
- Clink, clink.
278
00:12:53,939 --> 00:12:57,143
Well, uh, I wanna
thank you too, Pam.
279
00:12:57,243 --> 00:13:00,312
For cuttin' your
hibernation short.
280
00:13:00,412 --> 00:13:04,150
I know the grizzly's like
to sleep all year long.
281
00:13:05,918 --> 00:13:10,656
Aha. Hear ye, hear ye.
282
00:13:12,491 --> 00:13:16,929
Well, I wanna thank all y'all
who, who were invited.
283
00:13:16,996 --> 00:13:21,133
And all you freeloaders
whose asses weren't invited.
284
00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:23,769
I wanna thank you anyhow.
285
00:13:23,836 --> 00:13:28,440
But most of all,
I wanna toast my bride.
286
00:13:28,507 --> 00:13:30,342
Here's to you, boo.
287
00:13:30,442 --> 00:13:32,444
- I love you, baby.
- I love you too, baby.
288
00:13:32,511 --> 00:13:33,546
Yeah, yeah.
289
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:35,881
Alright now, alright now
it's my turn.
290
00:13:35,981 --> 00:13:37,683
I wanna make a toast
291
00:13:37,783 --> 00:13:41,220
to all the lovely ladies
up in here.
292
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:43,222
And especially
to the Waters women.
293
00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:47,726
Y'all know y'all got some
big 'ol corn fat asses on you.
294
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:49,662
Oooh-wee!
295
00:13:49,728 --> 00:13:51,564
Gina, I'm sorry honey
296
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:55,701
but some of these Paynes
are disgusting.
297
00:13:55,801 --> 00:13:58,804
Yeah, they got
the right last name. "Payne."
298
00:13:58,871 --> 00:14:00,739
Hey, what you say about pain?
You want some pain?
299
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:02,341
- I'll give you some--
- Wait, wait, wait, hold up.
300
00:14:02,408 --> 00:14:03,709
Hold up, fool!
301
00:14:03,809 --> 00:14:05,711
Them's my people.
302
00:14:05,811 --> 00:14:07,479
Don't make me jump you.
303
00:14:07,546 --> 00:14:09,582
Little Compton
is definitely in the hiz-house.
304
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:10,916
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
305
00:14:18,691 --> 00:14:20,159
- Hold on!
- Stop!
306
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:21,827
I said hold.
307
00:14:21,894 --> 00:14:25,030
Alright, alright,
alright, alright?
308
00:14:25,097 --> 00:14:28,167
Alright!
309
00:14:28,234 --> 00:14:31,003
- Thank you baby.
- Aha.
310
00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:34,773
Okay, now damn it.
311
00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:38,844
This is about me
and my wife to be, okay?
312
00:14:38,911 --> 00:14:40,112
Y'all ain't gon' be
fightin' up in here.
313
00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:42,248
Now everybody,
please take a seat
314
00:14:42,348 --> 00:14:44,116
and let's eat like family.
315
00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:46,785
- Sit down, daddy.
- Ease it, Mr. Waters.
316
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,587
Youse a grown man.
317
00:14:48,687 --> 00:14:50,890
Come on, Mr. Waters. Damn.
318
00:14:50,956 --> 00:14:53,626
- Big country, cut it out, man!
- Dad!
319
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,628
Sit down. Sit down now.
320
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,931
- Sit down.
- Sit down.
321
00:14:59,031 --> 00:15:00,399
Before I be a member
of this family
322
00:15:00,466 --> 00:15:01,967
I'll start cappin' in here.
323
00:15:13,445 --> 00:15:16,148
So, finally the big day, huh?
324
00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:18,651
- You nervous?
- Please, Tommy.
325
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,986
- What's my name?
- Now, that's my boy!
326
00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:23,422
No, I'm serious man,
what is my name?
327
00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:25,057
Why am I..
328
00:15:25,124 --> 00:15:27,159
Martin, I can refresh
your memory.
329
00:15:27,259 --> 00:15:30,429
You're the eighth dwarf Nappy,
remember?
330
00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:33,232
Not now, okay?
Please, this is not a good time.
331
00:15:33,299 --> 00:15:35,901
I don't come messin' with you
on groundhog day, do I?
332
00:15:35,968 --> 00:15:37,503
- She won't stop.
- Why you wanna stop me?
333
00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:39,271
- You know how--
- I didn't even say nothin'.
334
00:15:39,338 --> 00:15:42,174
I have pressure of marriage,
okay!
335
00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:44,276
I'm about to take on somethin'
much bigger.
336
00:15:44,343 --> 00:15:46,979
Can't you understand?
337
00:15:47,079 --> 00:15:50,916
Excuse me, but I-I think you're
sittin' on the wrong side.
338
00:15:50,983 --> 00:15:53,953
Now, you don't wanna tell me
where to sit.
339
00:15:54,019 --> 00:15:56,922
'Cause I'd get up on you
like a pair of tight draws.
340
00:15:56,989 --> 00:16:00,626
You want some of this, boy?
Oh, you're goin' down.
341
00:16:02,594 --> 00:16:05,097
Hold on. Come on, now. Come on!
342
00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:06,832
Y'all gettin' ready
to fight again.
343
00:16:06,932 --> 00:16:08,701
Dr. Waters, you're a grown man.
Suck it up, man.
344
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:11,937
Push that.. man ignore 'em,
that's big country, man.
345
00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:14,139
Big country, kill that, man.
346
00:16:14,206 --> 00:16:15,708
Damn.
347
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:18,344
- Grown men.
- I'm serious.
348
00:16:18,444 --> 00:16:20,679
Baby, if it's gonna be
like this today
349
00:16:20,779 --> 00:16:21,880
can y'all imagine
what it's gon' be like
350
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,382
at our wedding tomorrow,
can you imagine?
351
00:16:23,482 --> 00:16:25,484
I am not tryin' to see
what it's gonna look like
352
00:16:25,551 --> 00:16:27,386
at the weddin' tomorrow,
especially if it's like this.
353
00:16:27,486 --> 00:16:29,188
Girl, I told you
I will get with you
354
00:16:29,288 --> 00:16:31,490
at next Friday's bingo game.
355
00:16:33,325 --> 00:16:36,562
Good evenin', everybody.
356
00:16:36,662 --> 00:16:39,064
Martin, uh, you and your posse
357
00:16:39,164 --> 00:16:41,166
can go on and step
to your places.
358
00:16:41,233 --> 00:16:42,234
Reverend, okay.
359
00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:43,335
But you ain't got to be sayin'
360
00:16:43,402 --> 00:16:44,737
me and my posse, okay?
361
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:48,307
You and your little buddies.
Whatever.
362
00:16:48,374 --> 00:16:50,709
Now take this onion head boy,
too.
363
00:16:50,809 --> 00:16:52,578
Alright, you're lucky
we use you at the weddin'.
364
00:16:52,678 --> 00:16:54,380
Be cool. Okay, baby.
365
00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:57,416
I love you. We gon' do this.
Ain't gon' be no more fights.
366
00:16:57,516 --> 00:17:00,419
- Praise the Lord.
- 'Right.'
367
00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:03,322
Love you. Okay, everybody calm.
368
00:17:03,389 --> 00:17:05,891
See you later, Nappy.
Holler at you.
369
00:17:05,991 --> 00:17:07,493
- Okay?
- You give me my check.
370
00:17:07,559 --> 00:17:08,994
Okay, but you take..
you'll get your money
371
00:17:09,061 --> 00:17:11,263
you take care, man.
372
00:17:11,363 --> 00:17:14,933
Baby girl, would you
and the bridal party
373
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,668
kindly take your place.
374
00:17:16,735 --> 00:17:17,703
We're going.
375
00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:20,839
Oh! Boom shaka laka.
376
00:17:20,906 --> 00:17:24,376
But, uh, Martin's mother
hasn't arrived yet.
377
00:17:24,443 --> 00:17:26,545
While we are waiting
for Mother Payne
378
00:17:26,612 --> 00:17:29,615
I would like to address
the congregation.
379
00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:33,585
As you know, the uh, photographs
that have been circulatin'
380
00:17:33,685 --> 00:17:35,854
in the tabloids..
381
00:17:35,921 --> 00:17:39,258
I just wanna let y'all know
that's not me.
382
00:17:39,358 --> 00:17:43,128
That's my cousin Budro.
We look awful lot alike.
383
00:17:43,228 --> 00:17:46,865
I-I'm totally innocent.
384
00:17:46,932 --> 00:17:49,535
Uh, uh. H-here she is,
here she is.
385
00:17:49,601 --> 00:17:52,471
Mama Payne, my favorite cousin.
Come on in here, girl.
386
00:17:52,571 --> 00:17:55,307
Oh, dear. I hope she doesn't
make a scene.
387
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:01,814
Oh, my. Hi!
388
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:04,750
My babies, my cousins, hi!
389
00:18:04,817 --> 00:18:08,554
Lord, I'm here for my baby's
wedding rehearsal.
390
00:18:08,620 --> 00:18:12,558
He's gettin' married.
I can't believe it!
391
00:18:12,624 --> 00:18:15,661
Good, God! I didn't think
it could get any worse.
392
00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:17,496
I heard that, duck!
393
00:18:17,596 --> 00:18:19,765
Don't make me get the cut.
394
00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:21,800
Don't make me go to a funeral
and a weddin'
395
00:18:21,900 --> 00:18:23,335
in the same damn day.
396
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:25,671
You back up off of my man.
397
00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:28,674
You want some?
I'll cut you, too.
398
00:18:28,774 --> 00:18:30,342
Come on, come on!
399
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:33,112
Sit your asses down, everybody!
400
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:46,258
Oh, lord!
Done got my pressure all up.
401
00:18:46,325 --> 00:18:49,862
I know, mama.
402
00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:51,363
- Watch it, watch it.
- Okay.
403
00:18:51,463 --> 00:18:55,367
Oh, don't push me, alright?
Whoo!
404
00:18:55,467 --> 00:18:59,171
Alright. Kick up with the music.
Let's start now.
405
00:19:01,306 --> 00:19:05,010
Martin, Tommy,
y'all come out, now.
406
00:19:08,780 --> 00:19:10,349
Martin, Tommy?
407
00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:14,286
Uh, your turn, Gina.
408
00:19:17,956 --> 00:19:20,025
Why is my shnookums?
409
00:19:21,894 --> 00:19:23,829
Damn it!
410
00:19:24,696 --> 00:19:26,231
Where's my Martin?
411
00:19:26,331 --> 00:19:28,133
Where's my Martin?
412
00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:31,403
Hey, look y'all.
L-l-l-look at this, here.
413
00:19:31,503 --> 00:19:32,838
Martin, Gina, Tommy and Pam
414
00:19:32,905 --> 00:19:35,240
done rolled up out of here
and left this note.
415
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:38,010
"Dear friends and family.
416
00:19:38,076 --> 00:19:39,912
"Since you all can't get along
417
00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:42,247
"we decided to move along.
418
00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:43,916
We out!"
419
00:19:44,016 --> 00:19:45,384
Oh, Lord!
420
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:51,356
She done stole my boy
and left the country!
421
00:21:04,229 --> 00:21:05,397
Oh..
422
00:21:05,464 --> 00:21:07,432
Mama Payne, mama Payne.
423
00:21:07,499 --> 00:21:08,834
It's gonna be alright.
424
00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:11,303
Little apple head
425
00:21:11,403 --> 00:21:14,506
has stole my boy.
426
00:21:14,606 --> 00:21:18,977
Damn, damn, damn!
30640
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