Original subtitles

Ah-ah-ah George Clinton's Snoop Doggy Dog put in best.

You know what I'm saying, the reason I'm looking at your chest

is 'cause it's nothing but the dog get in me.

Jerome!

- Yeah? - It's me "Little Dog."

See, word on the street is you are the man to be.

Now, I wanna be like you.

Help me man.

First of all, who is you?

- Little Dog. - Well, look here Little dog.

How you just gon' roll up

and move one of my bones out the seat?

Huh? That was one of my fresh bones.

Huh? Young bone!

Don't come in here with a nose all snotty.

You want to know about the gang, you better ask somebody.

Alright, but I'm cool.

How the hell you gonna be cool

with binoculars on your eyes?

'You can see in the future, can't you man?'

You tell me, who's the next president?

Am I gonna be player of the year?

Is, i-i-is Michael Jordan coming back to basketball?

Will Chia pets go out of style?

Tell me something!

Alright, I take you to game youngin'.

Which one of these woman you gonna mack up in here first?

Alright, well, uh..

...just, uh, sit back. Relax.

And watch a true player from the..

Watch me work, Little Dog. Watch me work.

I'm gonna be back for you..

You just sit down, you make..

What's up girl? How you doing?

Ahh, I don't hear no music, but I like

to dance my way up to the seat.

Ahh, you mind if I sit down?

Now, your name must be Monalisa.

'Cause you're most definitely a work of art.

Girl, I like to drink your bath water.

Where you..Damn!

Is that right?

Oh, Romey Rome, done scared you off that bad?

But, that's alright.

Your breath smelled bad anyway.

Smelled like a whole bowl of snausages.

You know, your eyes are so huge.

They're like pools..

...and I would love to just dive into them.

Well, let's go take a dip.

Wait up, lady!

Where's my bone going?

Where's my bone going?

You heard what he said his name was.

"Little Dog!"

How you gonna get some affection

and he can't even get...

- Hey, Martin. - Yeah?

You seen Stan around?

He's been gone for three days.

I wouldn't worry about no Stan, man.

If I know Stan, uh, he's probably at a motel six

locked in a broom closet butt naked and ashy.

You know, that used to happen to me all the time.

And then I quit hitch-hiking.

Excuse me, I am Agent Caesar. Internal Revenue Service.

We're looking for Stan Winters.

Oh, yeah-uh. Well, uh, I haven't seen him.

Uh, have you, Shawn? Have you seen him?

- Stan who? - Yeah!

- Can you tell us where he is? - He's in his skin.

Yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ah-ah-ah, when he jumps out you jump in.

That's very funny, fellas. Very funny.

Can we get some straight answers, how about that?

Whoa, well, hold-hold on Rockford Files.

How you just gonna come up in here man

expect me to drop a dime on my man Stan?

I mean, are you crazy? Are you loco?

Are you whack?

When you see Mr. Winters can you tell him

he has one week to pay his back taxes

or we're gonna have to shut down this...station.

Thank you.

And stay out!

Your fake Billy Dee's.

'Can you believe it?'

Stan hasn't paid taxes in over 20 years.

Yeah, I can believe you.

I don't blame. I ain't mad at Stan.

I mean, we...we pay the government all that tax money

and all they give us is cheese.

How come you don't read nothing about that?

That's not true, Cole. We get plenty of things.

Like roads, and schools, get it?

Pam, all I know is me and mom's got so many

bricks of cheese, we can build ourselves a guesthouse.

Hey, Martin, I ran straight over

as soon as I got this video tape from Stan.

Wait, wait. No, it's a message to Martin.

Alright, alright. But keep your hand on the stop button, okay?

I ain't trying to see Stan

licking hot sauce off of Maya's feet.

Alright, soft stomach, pukey-puke.

'Mr. Winters, the plastic surgeon is ready to see you.'

'Have you picked out your new face?'

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, look, uh..

Give me that, uh, Yaphet Kotto nose.

And, uh, give me the Mick Jagger lips. Okay?

And, oh, yeah throw in Al B Shore eyebrow, okay.

Oh! Oh, one eye.

- Yo Martin. - What's up?

Now, I would tell you where I am, man

but as I am sure you know by now

the man is on my ass, man.

Now, Martin look. I need your help.

Now, I know we've had our disagreements in the past.

I've siphoned gas out of your car.

And I stole money from your desk.

But, hey, I'm willing to set those

differences aside if you are.

Martin, I need for you to send me $20,000

to pay off the Government. That's all I ask man.

- Send you $20,000! - What?

And, oh, by the way Martin if you haven't cashed that, uh

pay-check by now, I can't help you man.

Peace. Peace!

Damn! Martin.

They shuttin' Stan down.

Looks like you're gonna be out of a job.

So what you gonna do now, bruh?

Pam! What am I gonna do is help Stan get the money. Okay?

So he doesn't loose the station and I don't loose my job, Pam!

But, Martin, brother, how exactly

are you gonna raise $20,000?

You know what? I'm feeling kinda stressed.

And I ain't in the mood for no bald head reasoning right now.

Okay, why don't you get out, huh?

Take the globe and go.

Hey, hey, hey proud man, you get out.

Yeah, proud and split ends, you get out.

Alright, got rid of you.

Black eyed peas, you get out. Alright, alright.

Don't call me Black eyed pea I'm gonna --

Hey, hey, hey, call it what you want.

Afro man, you get out.

- Yeah, yeah, why-- - Alright, I'm going!

- What about your women's hair? - Hey. Hey there!

That's right. That's right. I am happy to be nappy, Cole.

What's up Detroit? This is Martin Payne.

And we are getting ready to kick off the Stan-Aid Radio-thon.

- Whoo! Yeah. Wassup? - Whoo, whoo! That's right.

We're staying on the air til we've raised enough money

to help our brother out. Now, the phone lines are open.

Let's get your pledges please.

First caller, how much are you pledging?

- '$500, Martin.' - Whoo, lady!

- Now, that's the start. - 'No.'

'That's what Stan owes me.'

'He took it out of my purse after he slept with my sister.'

'Stan ain't nothing but a snake.'

Ahh, lady!

Listen lady, if I don't raise the money, baby

ol' Marty Mar's gonna be out of a job, lady.

You ain't gonna hear my voice no more.

'So?'

So, so lady I ain't tryin' to be like rest of you losers

sitting around in the middle of the day

listen to the damn radio.

That's so lady! Okay, next caller.

'Hello, Martin!'

Stan? Stan, is that you?

'Yes, it is, don't worry about the money'

'because I've taken care of everything.'

'I sold WZUP!'

'The new owner should be there in a minute.'

Oh-oh-oh, Stan!

You sold WZUP?

To who? Who did you sell the station to, Stan?

Wee-ha!

What the hell did I buy?

This ain't a Country music station?

Stan done screwed me over.

Well, kick a mule!

Who are you man?

Red McMaster.

New owner of WEHA country music in Motown.

Wee-ha!

What's up..I mean WEHA.

This is Martin Payne.

You are listening to another full hour..

...of Charlie Pride.

The first brother of Country and only brother of Country.

Believe me I looked.

Now, we'll be right back..

...after I choke the chicken.

Did I actually hear you say WEHA.

Yeah, Shawn, I guess I got to man.

I got bills.

But I gotta tell you Shawn..

...old Marty Mar's not getting country music, man.

Every song i-i-is about, uh, lonely drunk people

trying to get over the broken heart.

It's bringing me down man.

Well, I don't know.

I live in a trailer park. Makes me feel like I got it goin' on.

Hey, Shawn.

Hi there, Marty.

It's not Marty, Red. It's Martin. Martin. Okay?

What's up with your gig?

One of my oil rigs caught on fire. Had put it out.

You know how to put out oil rig fires?

No, I don't. It's damn shame, too.

Maybe we could've saved some of them fellows.

Look here, Red!

We gotta rap the taste about this new format man.

Yeah, it ain't happening.

You see, this is Motown!

You know! Motown, alright!

I mean, ain't nobody in Detroit

trying to hear country music.

I mean nobody I know, Red.

- You think, Marty? - Ah! I know! Oh!

I've talked to people, yeah!

And it's not your fault, you don't know the score, Red.

You mean, you are country boy, right?

A big city is distracting to an old country boy like you, eh.

What, with all the horse-less carriages

and flying machines.

Red, now the way Martin thinks you should run this station--

Ah, to hell with that, Marty, look..

...I just know that you can turn this country mama out, eh.

Me and you, Marty. We gon' put moo back in Motown.

Red, I-I don't know about this--

Yeah, you do. Now, look.

To solidify our new friendship.

And so you can keep your job.

Can I have a little WEHA?

Red...I don't be WEHA-ing for nobody.

Oh, come on Marty. WEHA!

Damn, Red. You're busting the ear drums, Red.

Martin, WEHA!

WEHA! You can stop it, WEHA.

You're happy now, Red?

That was great.

Two weeks, we gonna hear the whole city is singing country.

- Gina. - Huh?

I'mma tell you, I don't know

if I can play that music another day, Gina.

It's driving us apart.

Martin, what are you talking about?

Country music, Gina.

Every time I listen to it, I get the feeling you..

...you're sneaking around town on me, Gina.

Lying, cheating and drinking, Gina.

Oh, come on, Martin.

You know I don't drink.

That ain't funny, Gina. You wanna be followed?

Stop it! You know what.

You're not even giving the music a chance.

That seems wrong.

That's because it ain't all music, Gina. Alright?

Believe me Gina, there's only one brother

in country music. And that's Charlie Pride.

And I done played his record every which-a-way, Gina.

Forwards, backwards.

You know what Charlie Pride records

say when you play in backwards?

"Help me, I am a black man

trapped in country music."

Okay, Martin. L-let me put it to you like this, okay.

- Umm...you need the dough. - You think?

Oh, brother, I know, see, 'cause, um

See that there dear, this ring here.

That's the pretty little thing. See!

I know how much that thing cost and, umm

now that I wrote you that "Thank you" card

you ain't getting it back.

- Yeah, well, whatever, Gina. - It's mine.

Alright, fine, yes, it is yours.

And it's pretty, so do what you got to do.

But, uh, I-I gotta tell you girl, uh..

I wa, I was sneaking listening to the, to country music.

- Uh-huh. Ah! - I-I kinda like it.

No, no, no, I mean not.. I mean.

I-I have mixed it with a Snoop Dog's Gin and Juice.

- It was fat, Gina! - Oh!

Hey, get pregnant, Gin and Juice, hey, get preg..

Oh, Gina, you should've--

See, that's what I'm talking about.

Somebody's gotta take Country to their own level.

If not you, then who? If not now, then when?

If not Detroit then damn it where?

- You know what? - What?

You should be a motivational speaker.

You should. You should be like the motivational, listen to me.

But you know what baby. I'm a-a...I'mma try.

- Are you? - Yeah, yeah.

Country music is about to get integrated..

...by any means necessary.

See, now, that's my Martin.

No, that's your Marty, Gina.

- Oh, that's my Marty? - That's your Marty.

- That's my Marty. - That's your Marty.

That's my Marty!

WEHA!

Howdy perks!

This here is Marty Payne

on the Detroit's number one country station.

Now, let's listen to a little something

I wrote for the ladies.

It's called "If you walk away from me

I'll just love you from behind."

One, two. One, two, three.

Ayy! Whoo! Yoo-whoo!

Yeah! Oww!

Whoo-hoo!

Now, why don't you all settle spell

and we'll be back on Detroit's number one country's station.

Yeehaw! Yeehaw!

Whoo-hoo!

Marty!

You're givin' this a hell of a try, ain't you?

Oh, I appreciate that, Red.

I gotta tell you..

...I-I didn't think I had it in me, Red.

I really didn't but, Red

you know what, I gotta tell you right now.

I'm happier than Eartha Kitt's draws on than they are, Red.

Hey, the music done got to ya, ain't it?

I used to think country music was about feelin' bad.

Ah, ah, ah, no, Red!

It's about sharing all the pain in your heart!

See, how powerful I just moseyin'.

That's just great, Marty.

And-and-and, uh..

Just hold on a minute, now, before I burst your bubble

seeing as how you got all countrified

and everything for me, you know.

But, you remember when I told you I wanted to put

the moo back in Motown?

Moo!

I must've been out of my damn mind.

Yo-you wanna run that by me again, Red?

Our numbers are in the crapper, Marty.

And frankly, I blame you.

Say, I thought you was gonna bring this kind of..

...street ends to country but..

...hell you're corny.

You mean everything

I tried to do to fit in around here, Red.

I mean, I bought the hat.

The tight ass jeans, the boots man.

Huh? Huh? All to save my job.

And now you gonna go call me corny.

Yeah, see I thought you was gonna bring

a kind of urban, gangster..

...cowboy kinda thing to it, see?

But...it just ain't happening.

You know, Red. Ha-ha! Cool!

Well, uh, I feel a edge coming on, Red.

Yeah, since we are coming back from commercial.

I-I feel a edge. You might wanna get out your tape recorder.

'Cause this is gonna be historical moment.

Yeah! Well, look here. We are back!

And I want to tell you something about our new owner.

Red McMaster.

Red McMaster, yes right!

When he

Okay, h-he taking out sheep...

Okay, alright. Everybody party.

Okay!

Alright, you douche commercial.

With it's alright.

Now, we will be back after this commercial

after Red .

Was that edgy enough for you, Red? Huh?

Whoo, was that edge enough?

- Marty. Marty. - Whoo!

- What? - You're funny as hell.

And you fired.

Fired?

Is that right, Red?

Radio!

The hell did you do that for?

It looked fly when Spike Lee did it in the movie.

But you know what I mean.

I'm out of here, Red.

Howdy, Shawn. Marty.

Martin, man, it's Martin.

Alright? Hey!

What's up with the gear?

One of my oil rigs caught on fire.

What's up with your gear man?

One of my oil rigs caught on fire.

- Ready? - Yeah.

Pickin' it up, right from here.

Alright, alright, alright. Here we go.

What's up with your..

We gonna get it. We gonna get it.