Original subtitles

I need to ask if you have a thing for emily owens

'cause I don't want to be a fool.

I like you. I just-- I don't see you that way.

Emily: What's wrong?

Micah: Um, it's getting late.

I'm just gonna head out.

Emily: Allison mccleary, age 17.

It hit the liver.

Straight-a student.

Perforated the bowel.

Has parents.

Potentially grazed the aorta.

Not to mention the damage in the retroperitoneum--

I can't even see what's back there.

It took the perfect route.

Hit just about everything.

But in moments of crisis, our identity is stripped away.

If this girl lives, she'll be a medical miracle.

April 4, 2002-- sat day.

I'm not going to lie; I was excited.

I still don't believe that I was skipping,

Even though cassandra kopelson said that I was.

The point is,

While the rest of the west wilton student body dreaded

The sats, I couldn't wait,

Because if there was one thing that I knew about myself,

One thing absolutely essential to my identity,

It was that I was a great test taker,

And the sats-- they were my super bowl.

Oh!

Which, in retrospect, I shouldn't have said out loud.

(chuckles)

One apple fritter, extra sweet skinny latte.

Oh, you shouldn't have.

Yeah, why did you?

He wants my cards. I really want her cards.

Surprised you haven't heard of them.

Kind of legendary.

Yeah, well, the legend didn't reach me.

What are you talking about?

Well, she makes these index cards, right?

But to call 'em cards really doesn't do 'em justice

Because they're laminated, they're color-coded,

They're indexed, they're categorized.

They've got every piece of information

You could possibly want.

Know the cards, know the test.

And, yes, I made them for the inservice exam.

It's a big deal;

You think I'd go card-less?

When we studying?

Whenever and wherever.

Hmm, I don't need cards.

See, that's the thing about the cards.

You don't think you need them,

But once you use them...

Will, I got it.

Hey, I need you to follow up with this patient. Hey.

Sure. I scratch your back, you scratch mine.

Is there gonna be a lot of hematology on the exam?

Can't tell you that.

I know.

I was just kidding.

(chuckles) yeah.

Look, I'm slammed.

Uh, 521.

Okay.

Hey. Hi.

Um, has micah been acting weird lately?

No, not really.

He has with me.

Like, a couple times he's been short,

And he's not laughing at my jokes.

That's not the hugest shock.

I just wonder if I did something.

Or maybe he's got something else going on.

Can't always be teacher's pet.

Hi.

I'm dr. Owens.

Hi. Hello.

I'm kostas pagonis.

And this most unhappy patient

Is my girlfriend, sierra la roche.

Kostas: Sweetheart, why don't you just tell her the problem,

And then, hopefully, we can leave.

Sierra: Okay, so I have this jaw pain.

And I took pain meds, everything,

But it's, like, this constant thing.

So I went to the dentist, he gave me some crappy x-ray,

Sent me here for a ct,

And now they're making a mountain out of a molehill.

We're supposed to go to greece

In a few days, and then off to ibiza.

Yes, that's true. I do like to take her to places

Where the bathing suits are very small.

So, can I go?

Not yet.

Um, everyone's just a little concerned

Because the ct showed a growth on your jaw

That we'd like to biopsy. Biopsy?

Because you think it might be cancer?

We're concerned that it might be.

We'd like to check it out.

Well, honey, it's gonna be fine.

But you should do that test.

Yeah, fine, okay.

Um, biopsy it.

Um, honey, will you get me something salty?

Right.

And, uh, don't tweet any ugly hospital gown pictures.

My darling, as if you could ever be ugly.

Um, can I ask you a question?

The biopsy-- is it gonna leave a mark?

On my face?

Because I'm obviously a model, so it's important.

Um, no.

We go through the inside of the mouth, so you're fine.

Okay, thank goodness.

Because that whole "beauty is only skin deep" thing is really

Just something that ugly people say

To feel better about themselves.

Right.

I'm gonna get that scheduled.

I think he's gonna propose!

What?

I'm sorry, I texted a few of my friends,

But I just, I needed to see a live reaction.

I found a ring box in his luggage!

Yay.

What are the three main sub-types

Of non-small cell lung carcinoma?

Squamous cell lung carcinoma, large cell carcinoma.

Automated voice: Correct. Correct.

Okay, next question.

What are you guys doing?

Studying. I found this great app.

App? It's amazing.

I bet it is, but it's not my cards.

But I can spare them now, if you want...

Because the app has all 1,500 questions and answers

That have ever appeared

On the inservice test.

1,500?

That's a lot.

It's overkill, some might say.

My cards have been culled down to the 574 questions

That have appeared on the test in the last ten years.

Well, my app keeps track of right and wrong answers,

Reinforcing them every five questions.

My cards are organized the same way,

But they reinforce randomly,

Which is more effective.

Will?

What's it gonna be? Cards or app?

Emily: Oh, cassandra, you are about to get burned.

Uh, you know, this time,

I'm probably just gonna go with... The app.

For convenience.

Yeah. Cool.

(cell phones chiming, beeping)

Something big in the er.

(sirens whoops)

(sirens wailing in distance)

17-year-old male, mva, high-impact collision.

No loc.

Ambulatory on scene, refusing backboard and collar.

He's why we're all down here?

Has she been here? Where is she?

She's on her way.

Please, I need you to wait inside!

Our daughter's been in a car accident. She's coming in.

Sir, next ambulance is on its way.

I need you to go inside.

What is he doing here?

Get him out of here. I'm so sorry.

Car was coming right at us and I swerved.

She wasn't supposed to be with you! I'm sorry!

Ma'am, ma'am. Is that allison?

I'm gonna need you to wait inside. Please.

We're gonna take care of it. I want him drug tested.

He's been busted before!

Get him inside!

(sirens approaching)

All right, trauma, get ready.

Car accident victim number two.

17-year-old unrestrained female passenger,

High-speed mva.

Car versus pole, rollover/ejection,

Thrown 30 feet.

Awake and alert on scene,

Gcs 14.

Emily: What makes us who we are? Can you tell me your whole name?

Allison mccleary.

Is it our name, our age, our height, our weight?

Where do you go to school, allison?

Grove oaks.

I'm a senior.

Alert and oriented times three.

Vitals are still totally stable.

Or are we revealed when we're defenseless?

Vulnerable?

Um, do you know where my parents are?

I really... I want to see my parents.

Okay, we're gonna find them. Mm-hmm.

I just need you to stay calm.

And still.

Really still.

I can't imagine how scared she must be.

Hey, I need you to prep the parents

They cannot panic when they come into this room.

Police asked for blood and urine on the driver;

Get that and then meet me back down here.

Okay.

Listen, do you mind talking to the parents?

I'll get blood on the kid.

Why?

Just, you know, you're better with that kind of stuff.

Okay, sure.

Emily: And even if you're startled,

We can't let it move.

Th-the picket.

When she was thrown from the car, it impaled her.

Right now, she's stable because the picket is

Holding everything in place, but it can't move.

Not even a little.

Okay?

Yes.

Yeah, we understand. Okay.

(sobbing)

(gasps)

Just stay calm.

Okay.

No nodding. No nodding.

It's okay. I'm okay.

Daddy, I'm sorry I lied about who I was with,

But it wasn't ori's fault, okay?

Hey, it's okay.

No one's worried about ori.

We're just gonna focus on you, okay?

So, what's the plan?

Dr. Owens.

Hi.

Allison, right?

Okay, so we're gonna take allison to imaging.

We want to know what the picket hit so we have

An idea of what to expect when we try to remove it.

But she's gonna be okay, right?

Because she's awake, she's talking.

We'll know more once we run some scans.

Okay, we're gonna take her now, so if you want to say good-bye.

Sweetheart.

My sweetie.

We'll see you soon.

Good-bye.

Good-bye. Let's go.

Nothing shakes, nothing bumps.

Ori: I swear, I'm not high.

You know, it was foggy out.

I had my low beams on.

This car coming towards us starts swerving into our lane,

So I swerve out of the way, right?

Heard you were charged before.

Yeah, I had some weed on me

When allison and I went to a mumford and sons concert.

Mm-hmm. Needle going in.

(groans)

I'm not high.

She's gonna be okay though, right?

I mean, it's a good sign that she's stable and stuff.

We don't know.

Your parents here?

No. They're away at some wedding.

They're not gonna be back till tomorrow.

All right.

You just hang tight, okay?

I want you to know we have all your information, okay?

So if you try to flee, you'll be in a hell of a lot more trouble.

I'm not going anywhere, man.

Not till allison is okay.

Micah: On three.

One... Two... Three.

Up.

We're walking on three.

One, two, three.

Easy...

Stop.

Left on three.

One, two, three.

Easy...

Stop.

Down on three. One, two, three.

Micah: Easy.

Easy.

Okay, good.

Okay.

All right.

(sighs) good job.

Don't laugh. Don't... Right. Sorry.

All right. You're doing great.

We're going to slide you through the scanner now.

Mm-hmm.

No, wait.

We can't.

It's not gonna fit.

Damn.

Call maintenance.

Micah: Keep the pole steady!

Okay, come on.

Keep coming.

All right. Good. It made it.

(machine clacking, buzzing)

It took the perfect route.

If this girl lives, she'll be a medical miracle.

See dr. Collins?

No, he's team one.

Who gets the drug test results on the kid?

Um, I can take them. Okay.

Emily: So, she's in surgery.

It's a long procedure, so we're going in teams.

I'm team three.

Team one is in there now.

The bed has been tilted

To maintain the position of the picket

Until we're ready to move it.

We're going to be working slowly and methodically

Gina: ...Until we reach the aorta, then we pull it out.

Gen surg, I need you to tackle that blush on the liver,

But I want vascular standing by,

I'm expecting a hollow viscous perforation

And probably a splenic artery laceration as well.

Emily: But even with all the planning,

We won't really know until we get in there

What we'll be looking at.

That kid ori.

Did you get the results back from his drug test?

I knew it. He was high...

No. Marlaina: Oh, my god.

I'm sorry... He wasn't.

I'm not supposed to share that information with you,

But if it makes you feel better, he wasn't... Doesn't matter.

If he wasn't with her...

She wouldn't be...

Is she going to make it?

A lot has to go right.

(sobbing): Oh, god...

(monitor alarm beeping)

Anesthesiologist: We're at 80/50.

Gina: Liver's completely macerated.

I need manual compression.

We have no visibility.

Perihepatic packing. Tamponade, now!

Okay, let's get that portal clamp in place.

She's losing too much blood.

We're transfusing wide open.

Well, it's not fast enough.

Faster, dr. Collins. Faster.

(monitor alarm stops, steady beeping resumes)

All right.

(sighs)

(monitor alarm beeping rapidly)

Damn. It's the hepatic inflow.

Trauma, find those bleeders, get them tied off.

They all start to look alike.

What?

Parents.

When their kids are in trouble,

They just have this look,

It's like... Almost primal.

It's the most awful thing.

That's why I stick to the microscope.

Don't need to see that look.

This'll just take a minute.

I will sneak in some studying.

Inservice?

Wow. Those cards are really... Colorful.

How's my biopsy coming along, molly?

Coming, coming-- we're slammed.

No worries.

(humming cheerfully)

App voice: Correct. Yes!

(cassandra chuckles)

How's the studying going?

No complaints.

You?

Feeling pretty confident.

App voice: Correct.

Will really seems to love the app.

Well, I guess we'll just see if he made the right choice.

Oh, he did, it's not even a question.

That's funny, because I remember

Testing better than you in high school. Well...

It was tough for me to fit in as much time studying

Since I actually had a social life.

Oh, yeah, I remember reading about that social life

On the bathroom walls.

Molly: Path report.

Go. Please.

Sorry.

I don't understand.

I had a toothache.

I mean, I thought I had a toothache.

The biopsy revealed osteosarcoma in your jaw.

Milford: The good news is that

It's located in an area where we can likely take out

The malignant part and keep it from spreading.

You take out...

Your jaw. Part of your jaw.

No, no. This isn't happening.

We'll have a plastic surgeon

And an orthopedic surgeon involved, of course.

They can do reconstruction.

It'll be all right, darling.

It just... It'll be okay.

How? How is it gonna be okay?

I have cancer.

In my face.

Um, I'll talk them through the procedure when I follow up.

Okay.

Um... Ori? Ori?

Yeah. Uh, what are you... What are you doing up here?

Can I help you with...

Uh, yeah, I can't just keep waiting down there.

No one's telling me anything about allison.

Look, please, tell me something.

She's still in surgery.

All right.

The car... Look, it came out of nowhere.

I wasn't high...

I know; I saw your blood work.

Oh, good, good.

Look, please make sure that, uh, allison's parents know that.

Maybe they'll let me see her when she's out.

I'll do what I can.

It's not fair.

I'd go over there for dinner all the time and everything,

And because of this one thing--

I mean, this-this stupid thing--

Now I'm this... This bad guy.

She's going to make it, right?

It's too soon to tell.

But I promise that I will

Personally keep you updated.

Okay.

Thank you.

Um, your nose is bleeding.

Uh-oh. That happens sometimes.

How often... Oh!

(grunts) what happened?

Emily: Subdural hematoma?

Tyra: Those air bags can hit pretty hard.

Hey.

Unofficially...

Are you seeing anything yet?

So far, he looks okay.

But I've still got a few more cuts to go.

Could just be stress.

Seeing his girlfriend like that...

Yeah, probably.

I just needed to check it out.

So, you were down in the lab, huh?

With hot molly?

You like hot molly?

I so like hot molly.

You gonna ask her out?

Hot molly has a hot girlfriend.

Oh. Bummer.

Do you want to study?

I know enough.

I'll pass.

She did say something the other day, though,

That made me think that they were on the rocks.

Mm. What'd she say?

"we're on the rocks."

Nice.

Man, cassandra is in for

A rude awakening if she thinks

She's going to beat me on a test.

Tests are my happy place.

I think I would have actually beaten you up in high school.

The point is, will made a mistake.

And he's gonna realize it when his grade suffers.

Oh.

What?

This is a will conversation.

I-I didn't realize it was a will conversation.

I'm just saying.

It was a mistake, choosing the app.

Radiology resident will take a look,

But I don't see anything.

Okay.

We're still waiting on official results, but yeah.

You look good.

Tyra...

What's happening?

Why are my legs like that?

Aortic dissection from the impact of the trauma?

Could be. He needs an angio.

Why? What's going on?

Your aorta is the largest blood vessel in your body.

We're worried that it was torn during the accident.

Okay. We're gonna have to check it out.

It's okay, just lie back down.

It's okay. (sighs)

Okay.

(monitor beeping steadily) check and double-check.

I don't want this girl dying of sepsis because we missed a hole.

Keep that irrigation coming.

Saline is cheap. Use plenty of it.

Okay, all necrotic material

And contaminated fluid should be removed.

Lavage with antibiotics.

Tetracycline, one milligram per mil.

(rhythmic beeping)

Vitals still stable.

I found a perforation.

Gina: Good job.

Okay, now we repair.

Team one, rotate out.

I'm not tired-- I'll stay.

Dr. Collins, rotate out.

Gina: Okay, we have a perforation-- excise the edges,

Use an omental patch if you have to.

Hey.

Hey.

I heard he was admitted, what's going on?

Emily: Nosebleeds.

He passed out, his legs turned completely white.

It's obviously something from the impact of the car crash,

But his ct was clear,

And his arteries are intact, so I don't...

Is she...

Alive? So far.

You were in there with allison?

(panting): She's okay?

Okay? No, she's not-- she's got a picket going through her.

Man, the car... It-it came out of nowhere.

It wasn't my fault.

So whose fault was it?

I'm gonna take you back to your room.

Got to draw some more blood. Yeah.

What was that about? What?

You were... You were just very harsh to ori.

Well, I just came out of a really harsh o.R.

Talk about it how it wasn't his fault.

He was driving the car.

Dr. Owens? Wha... Yeah?

Your patient's asking to be discharged.

Kostas and I did some research and there are other treatments.

Alternative treatments.

Although, it's only alternative to us.

I mean, in eastern cultures,

Western medicine is alternative, right?

No, um, that's not entirely true.

This guy, he's a world-famous shaman.

He's had the most extraordinary success stories.

I understand-- but, um, this is not the time

To try alternative medicine.

You have

A very aggressive cancer, sierra.

And this is my face.

I'm not just gonna say, "oh, okay,

Cut out a piece of my face."

I know it's scary.

We'll have a plastic surgeon

To delay this procedure, even just a few weeks, is a bad idea.

And that's what all the doctors said to all the patients

That this shaman has cured. Exactly.

I mean, he's got the most insane testimonials online.

(laughs)

I really can't stress this enough...

But you have stressed it enough.

But I'm a model-- I can't be some freak.

Now what do I have to do to get discharged?

I'll start the paperwork.

(sighs)

♪

Oh. Hey.

Hey. Uh, just black.

I'm having a problem with that patient you gave me.

She's got osteosarcoma of the jaw.

Needs a resection of the mandible.

Right.

Thank you.

But she won't do it.

She's a model.

She's obsessed with her looks.

Beyond obsessed and won't listen to reason.

I can't get her to focus on what's really important.

Any advice on how to get through to her?

Yeah, stop judging her.

What?

Obviously what's important to you

Is not the same as what's important to her,

So stop judging her for it,

And try to figure out where she's coming from.

Thanks.

Yeah, let me know how it goes.

Micah?

Um, is everything okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Did I...

Do something...?

No.

Okay.

It's just... It's...

You're acting different like...

Like I'm your resident and you're my intern?

Yeah, but...

I mean, we're friends, too, right?

You want to know what's going on-- here it is.

We were friends, but I realized that being friendly with you

Is getting in the way of being an objective and a fair mentor

To the other interns, which is my top priority right now.

Okay.

It's better if we keep it professional.

♪

Oh, do you have my discharge papers?

I wanted to talk to you first.

(laughs) I'll pass.

Come on, I was the, uh...

I was the first person

You told about the... Ring.

You don't have to talk.

I know you think I'm being stupid.

I don't think that.

I'm sorry I made you feel that way.

I've been thinking

About how hard it would be if someone told me

That I couldn't be a doctor anymore.

And suddenly,

My career was taken away? I...

I wouldn't just accept it either.

The career, though, it's only a small part.

What if someone told you that you couldn't be smart?

Everything would change.

Your whole identity, your career,

Your friends, your... Almost-fiancé.

Kostas seems to really love you.

Yeah, he does.

But everything that he loves about me--

My career, my confidence,

My, uh, brattiness--

It all comes from knowing that I'm pretty.

I've been "the pretty girl" my whole life.

Without it, I just don't know who I'd be.

And I know that sounds shallow, but it's the truth.

No, it doesn't sound shallow. It...

It makes complete sense.

But,

I think that if I couldn't be smart,

I would still rather be alive.

So, just take the night, and...

Think about it.

(quiet laugh)

Okay.

And, um...

Thanks.

Why aren't you studying?

Me?

I put my money on you.

The guys in the lab gave the inservice high score

To dr. Kopelson. (groans)

Don't worry, hot molly,

I got it in the bag.

Hot molly?

Hot-- because you're gonna be on a hot winning streak

When I take down cassandra.

What?

Cassandra.

I know you stole my cards. Excuse me?

Give them back.

They've been in my lab coat pocket all day.

You obviously took them.

So give them back.

And while you're at it, grow up.

(laughs) okay.

Dr. Portofino.

What?

(gasps)

Um, I took the wrong lab coat

From the locker room. Do you know where

Dr. Portofino is-- it's very important that I find her.

She went in on colectomy, won't be up for hours.

Do you think that I could just... (clicks tongue)

Pop in and get her locker code?

(laughing)

You're acting a little crazy.

What's going on? You were able to handle

The fact that they were sleeping together,

But the fact that they're studying together

Is putting you over the edge?

It was the whole reason that will and I became friends

Is that he wanted to study with me.

I was his smart friend.

And if I'm not his smart friend, I don't...

I don't know what I am.

I don't... (sighs)

What am I?

Everything feels so different.

It's already been different.

I think you've just been his friend. (pager beeping)

I'm rotating in.

We have control of the splenic artery. How we doing?

Still good. Okay,

I need all hands on deck.

We need everyone to stabilize here.

I'm not having this girl bleed out on us.

On three.

One...

Two...

Three!

(monitor alarm beeping)

Surgeon: It's vascular.

Gina: The aorta.

Partial laceration.

The intima isn't breached.

But we have to hurry-- aorta clamp.

Three-oh silk.

Tension on the suture.

Better visualization, dr. Owens.

Bp is dropping.

Okay, okay.

(alarm stops)

We're rising.

We're good.

Tough ten hours people-- good work.

Damn.

(sighs)

Oh, the surgeon's on the way.

Hey.

Why do you look so upset?

No, please...

Allison's okay-- she made it through the surgery.

Oh, thank god.

Unfortunately, it looks like the picket

May have injured her spinal cord.

Her spinal cord?

You mean she's paralyzed?

We don't know yet.

(crying)

Emily: We have to wait for the swelling to go down, but, um,

It's a possibility.

Dr. Collins?

Ori's missing.

I went to his room to do vitals and he was gone.

Ori, hey.

I need to see her.

We've been dating for three years.

Okay, no...

You need to go back to your room, okay?

No.

You're right-- it was my fault.

Dr. Owens says she's critical.

What if I never see her again?

She doesn't make it?

I just need to tell her that I'm sorry.

She doesn't know that I'm sorry.

Emily: Good-- you found him-- ori,

I need you to get back to your room, okay?

No, he needs to see allison.

The icu staff, they're still on their rounds.

We walk him in five minutes, walk him back out

Before her parents show up.

Will... He needs this.

Come on.

Okay. Thank you.

(sniffles, sighs)

Hey, ori.

Hey.

Are you okay?

Um, they don't know yet.

They said I might not...

I know.

Are you okay?

Yeah. Yeah.

They're saying there's something wrong,

But they don't know what yet.

Allison, I'm so sorry.

No, it's not your fault.

It was.

I don't know what happened.

I saw the car headlights coming at us,

And I swerved.

You mean the motorcycle?

What?

It was a motorcycle that was coming at us.

Allison?

Sorry.

Are you sure about that?

Um... Yes, definitely.

I think I might know what's wrong with you.

The reason that you thought it was a car and not a motorcycle

Is because you were experiencing diplopia,

Or double vision.

It's a minor symptom, and then things accelerated.

Your nosebleeds and the... The white legs.

We checked your blood,

And it confirmed that you have lupus.

What's that?

It's an autoimmune disease.

So your body is attacking healthy tissue.

But now that we know the underlying cause,

We can treat you, and with frequent monitoring

And medication, you should be okay.

If the car crash...

If it happened because I was sick...

It did. It did.

It wasn't your fault.

I'm glad it's all figured out.

Thanks for your advice earlier.

I think I, um, maybe got through to my patient.

Glad to hear it.

Wait.

Um, this sucks.

I understand that you want

To keep things professional-- I get that--

But this sucks.

'cause I really liked being your friend.

Nothing?

Nothing.

Emily: It's okay.

It's still early.

Daddy, I'm sorry.

Honey, no.

No, I shouldn't have lied.

But ori, he's sick, they said.

It's not his fault.

You have to let me still see him.

Honey, we're not talking about ori.

No, we are. We have to talk about this.

He's a bad influence.

No, he's not. I, um...

Um, it was my weed

That time, not his.

I was scared of what you would think of me.

You've always been so proud of me.

I was scared that would change, so...

So ori said he'd take the blame.

Allison, one thing, it would never change

How I feel about you.

Well, it changed how you feel about ori.

(allison gasps)

You felt that?

She felt that. Do it again, dr. Owens.

Full paralysis would mean no movement.

Allison has a long road of physical therapy

Ahead of her, but the fact that she has movement

In her lower extremities is very good.

Why don't I go tell ori?

Um, sierra?

What's going on?

Um, I thought it over,

And I just have to try this other thing first.

If it doesn't work, I'll get the surgery.

As your doctor, I really advise against it.

I know.

I'm just not ready for everything to change.

I understand.

Good luck.

(sighs)

Whoever scheduled an in-service exam

After an all-night shift is the devil.

Gina: That would be me, dr. Owens.

Great.

I-I still have time to do

Some last-minute studying.

Gina: You do that.

Hey.

I'll just... I'll let you study.

No. No, no, no, stay.

What's going on?

Nothing.

Not nothing.

You've been acting weird this whole shift.

She had a picket in her abdomen.

I know, but weirder

Than the standard picket-in-the-abdomen reaction.

There's a standard picket-in-the-abdomen reaction?

Yes, there is, and...

You sit?

Yeah.

What is it? What's going on?

It's just that... (clears throat)

It's been a while since I talked about this.

Okay.

I was in an accident in high school.

I was with my girlfriend, and it was raining.

We skidded.

Car hit us.

Yeah.

So, she, uh... Died.

My girlfriend. Oh.

Kate hollis-- that was her name.

Will, I'm really sorry.

Yeah.

And I think seeing ori, just listening to him

Say it wasn't his fault, which it wasn't...

No, no.

It wasn't yours, either.

Yeah, I don't have lupus.

It was an accident.

I didn't do anything.

And what could you have done?

Something, anything.

I just watched her die.

Will, you were a kid.

Yeah.

Yeah, I know, but still...

Yeah, I know.

I haven't talked about that in a long time,

But, uh...

I'm glad I told you.

Me, too.

Will?

What's going on?

Nothing. Nothing.

Not nothing.

You were using the cards, weren't you?

Yeah, I-I was.

Yeah, yeah, guilty.

You know what? It's like an addiction.

You got to ween yourself off slowly.

Whatever.

Your test score, not mine.

Emily: Trauma.

It changes everything.

After the moment of impact, nothing's ever the same.

You reshape around the pain, but you're never the same.

But maybe that's okay, that things shift.

Maybe they needed to shift.

Because we can get stuck in one spot, as one thing,

One identity, but we're not one thing.

We're never one thing.

Not to ourselves, not to each other and...

You're the only intern not writing.

Remember, this is your super bowl.

Sorry. I didn't mean to say that out loud.

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