Original subtitles

flash cars, vajazzling and boxing.

But while the tans you see might be fake,

the people are all real,

although some of what they do

has been set up purely for your entertainment.

Previously on The Only Way is Essex.

- I hope he bashes Kirk's face straight up.

- Blimey.

[grunting]

- He's a bit of a pretty boy this guy, you know,

he don't wanna get mashed up.

[laughing]

- I'm gonna offer you an opportunity.

- [Lauren] Okay.

- [Adam] Which would mean you coming

with me to Dubai to start this business.

- Oh my god.

- So babe what do you think?

- Too dressy.

- It's too Jordan.

- I'm not really in to the spiel of get your coat,

you've pulled, I just think that's really cheesy.

- That is a good chat up line.

- So, you girls been vajazzled or what?

- I have, do you wanna see it?

- Na.

- Are you just talking and texting?

- Well, yeah, I have seen him a little bit.

- Do you know what?

I wish Lauren would just jump on a plane

and go to Australia.

[upbeat music]

- So babe would you get any surgery done?

- Yeah I would, if I was older, I'd get Botox,

and then if I had kids I'd get my boobs done.

- Well done babe, what would you get done?

- Well you know what I'd have done don't yah.

- [Amy] You've got to have your nose done babe haven't you?

- I wouldn't have a nose job to make it like a tiny,

tiny little nose, but I'd just have that little bump gone.

- [Amy] That little bump gone.

- Because that's just what really ruins it.

- But then you'd look really different

with a nose job Harry.

- [Sam] Unless it's the character of your face.

- But this is you, that's what I,

that's what I'm saying about a nose job,

this is you now, do you know what I mean,

you're gorgeous everyone loves you, you don't need.

Yeah actually no yeah you do need a nose job.

- Ahhh.

- So we're all going to the boxing match ain't we?

And I'm going with someone.

- [Amy] With who?

- David.

- [Amy And Sam] David.

- Oh Harry, give us a kiss.

Oh my little cousin goin' on a date.

[phone ringing]

- Congrats on your first date.

- Hello.

Hello how are you?

- Who's that?

- Oh hi Adam.

- It's the agency.

- Really.

Oh Adam thank you so much.

I've got on Adam's books.

- Oh brilliant.

- Ahhh, thank you so much Adam.

It will be so good to work with you.

Ok bye.

- That is amazing. - Woohoo.

- Oh that's so good Am.

- We're on the same agency now that's brilliant.

- [Amy] It means we're in the same agency now.

Oh it will be so good.

- So means you can do like a photo shoot together.

- Yeah we can do a photo shoot together now.

- We definitely should.

That is brilliant. - I'm so proud of you.

- Ahh thanks hon.

- We need to go out and celebrate.

- Let's go Faces.

- Punch out.

Nice and easy, nice and easy.

Good good.

[grunting]

- What's happening Mark?

- What's happening Arg how you doing?

- Yeah good how are you getting on?

- Yeah just doing a last bit of training.

- Tactics for beating Kirk, how you gonna do it?

- He's probably going to go ding ding ding,

and come out like he's a street fighter

just swinging punches, I'm just gonna keep me guard,

punch straight, punch through,

after a minute he should be knackered

and the plan is he'll be laying down there

and I'll be going see you later son, JD and coke, off I go.

- See you at the bar.

- [Mark] Yeah.

- Looking good mate.

- Good yeah.

- Good very good.

- [Mark] Will I do him or what?

- Do him.

[upbeat music]

- So I got a modelling job today,

well actually a modelling contract.

- Hopefully we'll get some shoots together now.

- Yeah hopefully, let's hope so it would be so good.

But he does like all the models, glamour models.

- That's fantastic, that's fantastic.

- Ah look.

- Hi Am thank you.

- Well done Amy. - Well there we go.

- Cheers everyone. - Cheers Amy.

Congratulations on your new modelling contract.

- [Amy] Thank you babe.

Thanks babe.

- All right girls, what's happening boys you all right.

Congratulations.

- Thank you honey.

Have you met my date Jay?

- How you doing mate, I'm Mark.

- You all right?

Nice to meet you.

- And this is Jack, Jack Mark.

- How you doing mate you all right.

- Here let me pour you a glass out.

- No I can't, I'm boxing I can't.

- No we're gonna pour you a glass out.

- [Mark] Go on then I'll have one.

- By the way I am team Mark.

- Team Mark.

- Not team Kirk, team Mark.

- Are you sure.

- Cheers Mark.

- [Jay] Cheers Marky.

- Cheers.

Cheers boys.

[upbeat music]

- Hello mate.

- Do you guys feel really awkward?

- Big time.

- Really.

- I wouldn't have done this if I knew she was here.

I feel bad.

- I can't believe that, it's rude.

- At the end of the day like I'm with Jay tonight

so it's fine.

- Exactly.

Rude.

- Prick.

But cheers honey, we ain't gotta worry about that.

- Forget about him.

- It kind of looks like we're just rubbing her face in it.

Which is not what we wanted.

- I would not intentionally do that, I wanna be her mate,

I don't think I've done nothing wrong.

But to them it'll look like

I've brung yous here to show Amy.

I didn't even know she was here.

- See you in a minute babe yeah, I've got to go toilet.

See you in a minute.

- You all right?

- How are you? - How are you?

- I'm good you?

- Good thanks.

So how's things with you and Lauren then?

- Yeah it's all right, just still on talking terms now

and you know she see me and Lucy the other night

and came and spoke to us so it was good.

- Hi Amy.

- Hello, you okay?

- [Lauren] Yeah I'm fine how are you?

- Yeah fine thank you.

- I just want you know that, obviously when I met Kirk,

he told me he was single.

- [Amy] Okay yeah I understand.

- That's why I pursued things with Kirk.

If I knew he had a girlfriend, which,

I don't know what was going on with you two at the time.

But as far as I was concerned he was single.

- But as you can understand I was upset

because it didn't look like that, it looked like that,

it was like a business meeting

and then it seemed like you was like together, and we was--

- It was business meeting, I promise you it was and--

- Yeah, I can understand but I was a bit upset.

At the end of the day Lauren we wasn't working,

we was always arguing, he was always jealous and...

But you know Kirk is lovely

and you deserve him because he's a good boy so.

- Well I'm glad we've cleared the air a little bit.

I don't want it to be awkward.

Essex is such a small little.

- I know.

Everyone talks, and it's not my thing.

- And I'm sure we'll bump into each other a lot

so it will be nice if everyone could just get on.

Okay, all right.

- Brilliant, thanks honey.

- Yeah see yah.

- [Amy] Bye honey see you later.

- Do you still see Lauren?

- No I mean obviously I see her when I'm out

and we have a chat and we talk to each other in texts

and whatever like that sometimes but.

- I've heard different.

- Well you're hearing wrong.

- Because Amy give Lauren a massage didn't she.

- Really and what was said.

- She says that you still each other.

- Look I don't know what the future holds.

- You can never say never and yous two have a history,

I reckon yous two will probably go back out with each other.

- No not probably.

You can never say never you're right

but that's like saying you can never say never to me

and you being together one day.

- Oh.

- [Mark] Would you say never?

- No.

- Exactly.

You can't say never with nothing in life.

- Yeah well I'm moving on so.

- I'll see you later.

- See you later.

- Have you had any chance to think about the Dubai offer?

- The thought of actually being there,

it's like a hot country, it's my dream, sun tan.

- Yeah every day.

Everyday.

- Yeah everyday.

Obviously there's a few things that are keeping me here.

I'm like really confused if me

and Mark are gonna get back together.

- What's your like feelings for him,

I mean you still in love with him, do you love him?

- I'll always love him for the rest of my life

and I've always been quite open with that.

- Do you think Lucy knows about how yous two

are still seeing each other and meeting up and?

- She must be able to tell that he's not over me.

- I just think, personally I think that you need to just

decide now if you're better off without him

and I think you coming away and starting fresh

will just rejuvenate you.

Think about it.

- I don't know.

[upbeat music]

- So are you looking forward to the fight?

- Yeah I'm really, I've never watched boxing before.

- No, do you think Mark's gonna do it?

- Who knows, I to be honest with you I hope it's a draw

because I think it's a lot easier.

- I think there's going to be a knock out.

- Do you?

No way.

- Yeah I do, I do.

- Do they get a bit aggressive and stuff because I don't--

- Yeah that's the name of the sport though.

- [Lauren] Yeah I know.

- I've seen you out and about and that ain't even boxing,

that ain't even in the boxing ring.

[laughing]

- There's me chucking my drinks over everyone.

- But no it's going to be good.

It's gonna be a good night.

- I've got a text.

We need to talk, meet me outside in five minutes, Lucy.

- Lucy.

- [Lauren] Yeah.

- She's gonna speak to yah?

- Lucy, what?

Why would I talk to her?

- I dunno, like sometimes in situations like this,

sometimes it is good to just sort it out, have a chat.

- He's got on the pads, he's nice and sharp.

- [James] Mark.

- How you doing you all right mate, how's it all going?

- [Mark] It's going all right mate.

- You ready, you preparing yourself, yeah.

- Yeah.

Just doing the last little bits.

- Yeah you'll be fine mate, you'll be fine.

- What's with the suit, where's the team Mark shirt?

- Yeah well Mark I'm neutral I can't support you or Kirk.

I've got to be in the middle ain't I.

- All right Arg.

- [James] Mark course I got the fucking Team Mark shirt on.

- Superb.

Superb, love that son.

- Well listen all I gotta say is, win or lose,

I'm really proud of you doing

what you're doing tonight mate.

- Oh good boy.

- [James] And I couldn't do it myself so.

- Don't get me emotional

because I'll start getting lumps in my throat and crying.

- No but listen seriously Mark, just give it your best,

win or lose you're a winner to me, so you've done well mate.

- Good boy Arg.

Have a good one yeah, see yah in a minute.

- Yeah mate, see you in a bit.

Good luck.

- Cheers mate.

- Remember what I said, right.

Keep your hands up at all times.

- Yep.

- Just relax, keep your breathing right.

Okay don't, he ain't gonna knock you out.

- Yeah he said that yeah.

- [Ben] You know he's got nothing,

he's got nothing on you mate, don't worry about it.

And just enjoy mate.

- Yeah I'm gonna get it done English.

And do you know what I did tell him as well,

I told him I was a left hander,

so he's been training now for a left hander.

- Oh he's been working for a Southport yeah.

- Yeah so I'm right, so--

- So you're gonna surprise him with a right yeah.

- Surprise him, and give him some haymakers.

- Just relax, just please relax.

- No I'm gonna, I'm gonna beat him up,

I'm gonna turn Mark Wright into Mark Wrong.

[laughing]

Give it a go. - Like it, like it.

- You know what I mean, no it's gonna be good.

- Love it, well look come here.

- Give me a cuddle.

- Big cuddle yeah.

I love you.

- I love you too.

- Go on, you just do it all right.

- I will.

Oh hello.

- Hello.

- Hello Lauren how are you.

- All right thanks, how are you?

- You all right.

Right I'm going to leave yous two together.

- [Kirk] All right.

- Just look after him for me.

- Hello. - Hello.

- I'm gonna beat him up so bad.

- I know you are.

- He thinks he's going to knock me out first round.

- Not in a million years.

Everyone wants you to win though you know that right.

- Hopefully.

You know I'm gonna enarf give him a seeing to.

- [Lauren] Good luck.

- Right I'll see you in a bit.

- [Lauren] Bye, bye.

- How you feeling Mark?

- Yeah feeling all right Nan.

- Yeah.

- Feeling ready yeah.

- Oh good, good.

- Bit nervous but I just wanna get in there.

- Yeah.

Won't be long once you start.

- Yeah.

- I mean it, yeah, but I've bought granddad's watch with me.

- Oh lovely.

- So that that'll give you a little bit of encouragement,

he's looking down on yah.

- [Mark] All right Nan lovely.

- [Pat] All right.

- [Mark] Yep.

- Right, oky doke.

- All right Nan I'll see you later.

- See yah later yeah, ted da mate.

- See yah.

- Yeah good luck anyhow.

- Cheers Nan.

[upbeat music]

- [Lauren] I just got your text.

- Yeah you all right?

- Yep fine.

- There's just been some rumours flying around,

like I've had Julian come up to me

and few people come up to me and saying,

oh there's still something going on with you and Mark,

basically I just wanted to hear your side

of the whole situation.

- I don't know what he's said to you

but we do still love each other

and we can't let each other go

and I do see him and speak to him all the time and--

- But this is what I don't get,

I don't get why you'd want to do that

when you know I'm with him.

Why would you--

- Your relationship with him,

I don't really understand it to be honest with you

because I know what he says to me

and the way we are together--

- So what, what does he say to you?

- We still love each other and he gets me

because I think yeah we do.

- [Lucy] What he still says that to you?

- Of course yeah,

otherwise we wouldn't still be seeing each other.

- So you're seeing him knowing that when you go out,

I'm standing there with him on a night out,

you're still happy then to go and see him.

- Has he said to you, you're boyfriend and girlfriend?

- Every time I'm with him there's you ringing on his phone

and he doesn't answer.

- No not at all.

- [Lucy] You send him picture messages

of yourself to him which I, one thing is I don't get that.

- Not at all.

- You're 24, I've seen them Lauren.

I've been laying in bed with him

and there's picture messages coming through of you.

- Lucy, Lucy, when, when?

- A couple of nights ago.

- Well then why would you want to be with him knowing

that he still sees his ex girlfriend?

- [Lucy] Yeah but I don't know that,

it's you telling me that.

- You must be stupid.

Are you naive, you've seen, screaming outside Faces,

you've seen the text messages the calls,

you've seen the way with each other.

- I've seen you calling him yeah.

- Lucy I wake up everyday, we call each other,

it's not one way, sided this thing

because do you think I'd really chase him you know.

- So why aren't you moving on?

- Because he hasn't let me.

- [Lucy] Why are still holding onto him?

- Because he doesn't let me.

- What do you mean he doesn't let me, delete his number,

block his number, then he ain't gonna be there is he.

- If I really wanted to I would, I would do that

but clearly I don't because I've still got feeling for him.

- Does that not really hurt you

that he's seeing other girls since being with you?

Why would you wanna keep going back to him?

I don't get it.

- Me and Mark will only be over when I say it's over.

- I don't, it doesn't, I don't care anymore Lauren,

just have a good night and I'll see you around.

[upbeat music]

[grunting]

- Ladies and gentlemen,

do we have any Mark Wright fans in the building?

[cheering]

Do we have any Kirk Norcross fans in the building?

Ladies and gentlemen I give you Kirk 2 Cross, the Cross.

[cheering]

In the blue corner Mark Wright.

Come on.

[cheering]

Come on.

Come on this is the fight you've all been waiting for.

Let's fucking do this.

[cheering]

First round.

[bell ringing]

[cheering and shouting]

- Oh my god.

- Knock the little shit down.

[cheering and shouting]

- Go on Mark.

[cheering and shouting]

- [Ben] We need another head guard from somewhere.

[cheering and shouting]

[bell ringing]

[cheering and shouting]

- I want Kirk to win, don't you?

- Go on Marky.

- Kirk was a prick to me.

- But you still want him to win though don't you?

- Oh my gosh, it's too stressful.

[bell ringing]

[cheering and shouting]

[gentle music]

- Kirk looks battered.

- Go on Mark.

Yes.

- Two, three, four.

- Oh my god.

[bell ringing]

- He's hanging on, bang bang, bang bang.

- Have I done it?

- Oh you've done it, it's all over.

- Kirk it ain't over yet, it ain't over yet,

it ain't over yet.

- Come on.

[bell ringing]

[cheering]

- Mark just turned around and looked right at me in the eye.

To think I made love to Mark last night, so weird.

- And the winner is, in the blue corner,

Mark 2 Cross Right.

[cheering]

Well done to both fighters,

well done to Kirk and well done to Mark.

Both made yourselves very proud tonight.

Well done, both of you well done,

well done Kirk and well done Mark.

It's a massive thing doing

that in front of everyone, well done.

Kirk you done yourself proud mate,

well done and Mark you've done the same, well done mate.

- [Lucy] You all right.

- [Mark] Gore you look lovely.

- Congratulations.

Well done.

How do you think it went, good?

- It was good yeah.

Did you enjoy it?

- I don't think I enjoyed it but I'm really proud of yah.

- That's a lovely dress by the way.

- Thanks.

- Have you had a good night though?

- Well I was having a good night and then I spoke to Lauren.

- Right.

- Basically she then turned round and said to me,

me and him are still together,

we're still seeing each other,

we're still talking, we're still texting.

- I can tell you that was the complete honest truth

because I might as well.

I am seeing you, I haven't said to her we're boyfriend

and girlfriend because we haven't even said that yet

and I have seen her probably two times

in the last couple of months, nothing like when I see you.

- The only way I can stay with you

is if you tell me a hundred percent

that you're never gonna get back with her again.

Otherwise I'm gone.

- At this moment in time I'm gonna tell yah

I'm never gonna get back with her again.

- I'm just so confused,

I've got all these people come up to me saying things,

I don't want to be mugged off myself,

I just don't know what to do.

I'm here for you for the answers--

- Listen I'm telling you now

I don't want to get back with her,

if I wanted to get back with her I would,

ok, I want to try and move things forward with you

and we'll see what happens after tonight right?

See you downstairs, let me get changed

and I'll see you in a minute yeah.

Now I've got pink lipstick.

- You've got pink lipstick on yah.

- See you in a minute.

- [Lucy] See you in a minute.

[upbeat music]

- All right.

Bad went it.

- I'm so sorry.

- Bad ain't it.

Are you all right?

- Babe give me a cuddle.

- It's bad, you know what.

- Oh I'm so sorry.

- You know what he just out boxed me.

- I'm so sorry.

- Yeah that's all right.

- Your face looks bad.

- No it's all right,

it's only well that he broke my nose you know.

- I'm so sorry honey.

- He was just a better boxer you know.

How are you?

- I'm upset.

I was watching it thinking how upset

I was watching you Kirk.

I swear on my life I was thinking what are you doing?

- I just could not get inside his punches, he's really good,

do you know what I mean?

But that's the way the cookie crumbles.

- I know honey.

I cheered for you anyway so don't worry.

- Are you sure?

You see I want to be your mate Amy I really do.

- Yeah that's fine, we are mates do you know what I mean.

- At least we tried, do you know what I mean we tried.

- Yeah we did.

Okay, okay babe.

Bye darling.

- [Kirk] Right see yah later.

- [Amy] See you soon.

- [Mark] Wow you look nice.

- Hello.

All right.

- What did you think?

- Babe I tell you something, I was the most nervous,

I've never seen a fight in my life and I was so scared

and you won it, badly and that's what I said to everyone,

I said I know Mark's gonna win, I said that all along.

The way you looked at me and I just thought,

I just love you.

[laughing]

- I had a little chat with Lucy tonight.

- [Mark] Yep.

- Are you going out with her?

- She's not my girlfriend no.

I don't know what I want, I'm totally confused.

I still love you obviously and I probably always will,

but I like Lucy she's a nice girl.

- [Lauren] So why bring another girl into our relationship.

- We wasn't together.

- Do you love me?

- [Mark] Yeah.

- I love you.

- Yeah you're my first love I always will.

- Right, so why bring another girl in the middle of it,

when you're not sure what you want.

- Hmm.

I don't know Lauren, I don't,

look do you know what I'm confused.

- I've got something to tell you.

I've been offered the most amazing job opportunity.

- Mmhmm.

- To move to Dubai.

- [Mark] Right.

- And if me and you aren't meant to be together,

I'll get on that plane and I ain't coming back.

- All right, well you've got to give me a couple of days

to think about things,

you can't just spring it on me that quick.

- When I'm gone, I'm gone.

- I'm not giving you an answer now, that's up to you.

If you love me you'll respect the fact

that I need a day or two.

- No.

- [Lauren] Love you.

- [Narrator] Next time on The Only Way is Essex.

It's Christmas,

but who will Mark be kissing under the mistletoe?

What will Amy and Sam find in their Christmas stockings?

- Oh shut up.

- [Narrator] Who will get to share some of Kirk's Yule log?

And will it be Harry or Nanny Pat

making this year's mince pies?

- Huh.

- [Narrator] Who knows, they're real people

and anything can happen on The Only Way is Essex.

- You've got fake boobs and you look really nice.

- Shut up.

[upbeat music]