Original subtitles

♪♪

♪ Hey, show me the way ♪

♪ What are the rules? ♪

♪ How do you keep a family? ♪

♪ What is the key? ♪

♪ How do you stay together? ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa-oa-oa ♪

♪ If love is all you need to get along ♪

♪ To be strong for each other ♪

♪ I'll give you all I can give you ♪

♪ Where I live ♪ ♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba ♪

Whoa!

Hello? Is anybody here?

Hello?

Oh, wait. What's that?

Oh, you guys wanna hear one more song?

Really? Okay, okay.

You guys are a good crowd.

Um... All right.

Here's something I came up with about five seconds ago. Um...

♪ I just got off the airplane ♪

♪ Feelin' so alone ♪

Ooh!

♪ I don't know if I should be here ♪

♪ Rollin' like a stone ♪

Will you stop doing that?

No more excuses.

When I ask for fizzy water, I expect it to fizz.

Excuse me-- And they're also

still putting cupcakes in my dressing room.

My brother was the cupcake guy.

I am a solo act.

Didn't you read the marquee?

David Gallagher, formally of the Rockits.

David-- Oh. Sorry, honey.

No autographs. But you can buy

one of my T-shirrs out front.

I'm Ruby. I'm your daughter.

I'm gonna need some rum in that water.

♪♪

♪ We were born atomic ♪

♪ Second to none in the modern age ♪

♪ Cut fast clean Stripped down, automatic ♪

♪ High gauge ♪

♪ We were built to last ♪

♪ American cast ♪

♪ The immaculate heart attack ♪

♪ This is for the girls who never said no ♪

♪ And the boys who looked back ♪

This was the Rockits' first video.

We were top 10 on MTV for a year.

We know, Dad.

Your uncle and I had just been named

Best New Artist of 1988.

We should never have shown him this fan site.

So I can watch this whenever I want?

And we don't even need to be here.

I'm just really happy you wanted to see me.

Of course I did. I mean, you're my daughter.

It's like a dream come true.

Well, how do you think I feel meeting my dad,

the famous rock star?

That's what I meant.

♪ Feelin' so cool and clever, oh ♪

That was my patented knee slide.

Oh, wait. Wait. Here comes your mother.

Morning, guys. Oh, Patrick,

the kids don't want to watch those old videos.

Thank you, Mom. Oh, wait!

Here comes my tiger crawl.

♪♪

You're right. You're right. We can't live in the past,

and I don't want either of you going down this road.

Rock stars are selfish, vain creatures.

You turned out okay.

I'm talking about him.

Oh, yeah.

And when I wore spandex,

I could kick even higher.

So, why aren't you and your brother working together anymore?

Well, between you and I,

the man is a total prima donna.

I'm still waiting on that water.

That's so sad.

I mean, family is everything.

You know, I bet if you just talked to him,

you guys could still be the Rockettes.

"Rockits."

So, how long you in town for?

What do you mean? When do you fly home?

I bought a one-way ticket.

What do you mean?

What do you mean?

Uh-huh.

Can you believe Dad trying to impress us

with those stupid videos?

Hey, let's watch mine.

Again?

Come on. It's setting the Internet on fire.

Burn me, baby.

♪ I am a dog without a bone ♪

♪ I am a house without a home ♪

♪ Hear ♪

♪ Hear me ♪

Hey.

♪ I'm a cord without a phone ♪

Jordan, Ben, your uncle's here.

David? Did Dad go out of town?

Hey, guys. It's me.

How cool is that?

Honey, I'm home!

Well, let the games begin.

Honey, have I got a surprise for you.

I've got a surprise for you.

Guess how many SUVs we sold today?

I don't know. What-- Twelve.

Twelve? Nobody sells 12.

The point is that my dealership is doing so well,

I'm thinking about opening up another one in Tampa!

Isn't that terrific? Mmm.

I smacked your dad so hard,

he split his parachute pants.

Oh, no!

He came on stage wearing these giant electric boots.

They made him, like, a foot taller than me.

I asked him to take them off, and he lost it.

So boom. I had to deck him.

It was not just the boots.

You had a problem with everything--

my singing, my hair, my cape.

Hello, Pat.

Don't call me Pat. I hate Pat.

May I speak to you privately?

Sure, Master P.

P. Diddy. Puff Patty.

By the way, nice hair color.

What do you call that? Steel wool?

What are you doing here?

They just extended my gig at the Okeechobee Indian Casino.

Again? Haven't the Okeechobees suffered enough?

And I thought I might drop by and share the good news.

Hooray!

Now what do you want?

Oh, that hurts.

I'm your brother.

Hi. David, I know you told me to wait in the car,

but there's a really big dog outside.

Is he yours? 'Cause he looks kind of thirsty.

And, actually, so does your limo driver.

I'm really sorry if I ruined the surprise.

I'm just kind of nervous. And this is a huge house!

You must be Patrick. Oh, I'm gonna stop talking now.

Oh, this is my daughter Ruby.

Do you mind if she lives here?

So, on my 12th birthday, my mom showed me a picture of her with David

and said that this guy was my real father, and a legend.

Oh, please.

Dad, just let her tell the story.

I-- I mean, she is our beautiful guest.

She's also your cousin.

Go ahead, Ruby.

Anyway, after my mom died,

I ended up moving in with my grandparents in Ocala.

I mean, they were so sweet, but they just kept

forgetting my name, and...that I lived there.

Anyway, um, one day in English class,

we had an assignment to write to a great American--

And you wrote to David?

No. Oprah.

But my friend Michelle, who's, like, totally into the '80s,

she said that she was writing to David Gallagher.

And I'm, like, "Well, that's my father."

And she's, like, "No way! Shut up!"

I'm, like, "No, seriously, that's my dad."

She's, like, "Shut up!" I'm, like, "What is your problem?"

She's all, "My problem"-- Get to the part where you meet me.

Anyway, I decided to prove it,

so I looked David up on Facebook,

got his address and, well, here I am. Yeah.

You're on Facebook?

Ben, why don't you and Jordan show Ruby my dance studio?

It's a big room with mirrors.

It's a big room filled with mirrors!

Ah, so, I guess she'll have to attend some sort of school.

Why didn't you call and tell us about her?

I didn't have time. She just showed up on my doorstep.

And now you're trying to drop her on ours.

Look, I know I'm asking a lot.

But she can't live with me at the casino.

I'm an entertainer. I go to sleep at 3:00 in the morning,

I wake up at noon, often not alone.

You're a car salesman.

Car salesman?

Uh-oh.

Listen, if I wanted to,

I could be the one out there milking our past.

Oh, come on! You are milking it!

I've seen your billboard.

"Let Gallagher Motors Rockit you into a new car"?

That wasn't me. That-- That was my marketing department.

And I suppose they forced you into your space helmet.

Besides, what makes you think you still got it?

Use it or lose it, baby.

Stop. All right? I put up with your fighting every Christmas.

I am not putting up with it today.

I am just concerned about Ruby.

He brought up the space helmet.

Are you guys fighting because of me?

Oh, honey, um, no, no.

They always do this.

But David is right.

A casino is no place for you. You need a real home.

Right, Patrick?

Will she be living here alone,

or will she bring baggage?

"Use it or lose it, baby."

♪ We were born atomic ♪

♪ Second to none in the modern age ♪

Ooh. Ooh.

Ahh! ♪ Cut fast clean ♪

♪ Stripped down, automatic, high gauge ♪

♪ We did it all, oh ♪

♪ Feelin' so cool and clever ♪

And this is the master bedroom.

♪♪

♪ I'm a house without a home ♪

All right. Come on, you guys.

It's time to get dressed. Whoa.

You look...

Like a girl?

Thank you. Now let's go. We're gonna go see David's show.

What? We never go see David's show.

Well, we're gonna go tonight-- the whole family.

Your mom and I decided.

Oh, I'm sorry. Was I not clear?

Move it!

I'm sensing a power shift in this family.

Yeah, I'm cool. Maybe I can make some music connections.

♪ I am a wanderer alone, oh ♪

♪ I am a dog without a bone ♪

Oh, that is where I've seen you.

You're the one who sings "Lost in My Own Life."

That'd be me.

Ohhh! That is the funniest thing I've ever seen.

I-- Wait. Funny?

No, my video isn't-- isn't funny.

What did you do?

Wait. Ow!

Ben ruined my video. Hey, I would argue

he took care of that himself.

Show me what you did.

♪ I am a wanderer alone ♪

♪ I cannot sing, so I moan ♪

♪ I'm a blah, pretentious drone ♪

See? It's funny.

I'm gonna throw this in the street!

Oh, no, you're not. Hey. You're gonna apologize.

He's your brother. Look who's talking.

What's that supposed to mean? That's all right, Dad. I'll hit him for you.

No, you won't. Will you please help me here?

Don't look at me. They see you and David and think this is normal.

Oh, so now it's my fault?

Will you guys just stop?

You're all fighting, and I don't understand why.

Ruby, it's okay. This is what families do.

But you and David are family,

and you can't stand each other.

Gosh! I just-- I wish you guys knew what you had.

You'd appreciate it as much as I do.

We do appreciate it.

And someone's finally gonna fix this.

Aren't you, Master P?

♪♪

Hmm?

More?

Hold on.

Not the face.

I just wanna talk.

Okay.

Come on in.

Uh, you're all here.

Does that mean you're coming to see my show?

Yes, but first, there's something I need to say.

Look, although you've been difficult,

at times, impossible--

Like the night he got drunk and begged Huey Lewis to replace me.

Patrick.

My-- My point is, we have fought for too long,

and I haven't been a good example to my sons.

Before they can respect each other,

we have to.

Get over here.

Why?

Just go.

Too soon.

All right, everyone. Let's give David some time to put his makeup on.

My makeup is on.

I'm really excited to see your show tonight.

Well, thanks.

And I got your message. I'll see what I can do.

Cool.

All right.

I'll leave you alone so you can get into your stage outfit.

This is my stage outfit.

Where's Jordan?

I was just thinking the same thing.

I'm gonna go find him.

What are you doing?

These are die-hard Rockit fans.

Audie, it's only a matter of time before I'm recognized.

Excuse me. Would you mind--

Not at all.

taking a picture of my husband and me?

Whoo. Dodged that bullet.

Hey. Your mom's looking all over for you.

Come on. We're gonna miss the show.

That's okay. I-- I'd rather brood.

Come on. Don't be upset about your video.

Look, a lot of people saw it, right?

Yeah, so they could laugh at me.

But Ben had, like, the totally right idea.

I mean, your video's kind of a downer, but--

Of course it's a downer.

Life is pain, woman.

No. No, no, no. But, I mean, it's not bad.

It's a really good song.

I just, um...

I've been thinking about it a little bit,

and I just wanna show you what I came up with. No...

It's-- No-- I'm just speeding it up a little bit.

I'm giving it more energy. I don't like it speeded it up.

It's good this way.

♪ Don't have to be a wanderer alone ♪

♪ Don't have to be a dog without a bone ♪

♪ Just come to my house, and I'll be home ♪

♪ I can hear you ♪

♪ How did you end up lost at sea? ♪

♪ You don't have a boat or live near a beach ♪

♪ But if you're in need of rescuing ♪

♪ Well, I will hear you ♪

You're pretty good. ♪ I want you to know you're never alone ♪

♪ You'll always have a place to go ♪

♪ It's on the brighter side ♪

♪ I'll color your night ♪

♪ I'll lead you to light ♪

♪ Put hope inside so you can fight ♪

♪ You don't have to be lost ♪

♪ Lost in your own ♪

♪ Life ♪

♪ Lost in your own ♪

♪ Life ♪

♪ Li-Li-Li-Li-Life ♪

Oh, come on.

Ladies and gentlemen,

the Totem Pole Lounge

is proud to present

the man,

myth, the legend,

David Gallagher!

Ah, it's wonderful to see you tonight.

Before we begin, I'd like to introduce

someone very, very special to me--

someone without whom

I would not be standing on this stage tonight.

Ladies and gentlemen,

Chief Dan Littlefeather!

Namaste.

But there is someone else here tonight

that I think you all might remember.

Ladies and gentlemen, my brother Patrick.

What do you say, bro?

A little Rockits reunion? Come on.

Did you--

Me and Ruby hatch a plan together?

Don't be absurd.

But--

Oh, you've been responsible for 20 years.

Now get up there and make an ass of yourself.

...three, four.

♪ We did it all, oh ♪

♪ Feelin' so cool and clever ♪

♪ Oh, ohhh ♪

♪ We never knew, oh ♪

♪ Only a dream lasts forever ♪

♪ We did it all, oh ♪

♪ Feelin' so cool and clever ♪

♪ Oh, ohhh ♪

♪ We never knew, oh ♪

♪ Only a dream lasts forever ♪

♪ Only a dream ♪ ♪ Lasts forever ♪

♪ Only a dream ♪

♪ It's only a dream ♪ ♪ Only a dream ♪

♪ Don't have to have a heart that's turned to stone ♪

♪ I don't have to be a king without a throne ♪

What does that even mean? Do you even know?

Uh, it rhymes.

♪ 'Cause I can't hear you ♪

♪ I want you to know you're never alone ♪

♪ You'll always have a place to ♪

♪ Go ♪ Yeah!

♪ It's on the brighter side ♪ ♪ Show me the brighter side ♪

♪ I'll color your night I'll lead you to light ♪

♪ Put hope inside so I can fight ♪

♪ I don't have to be lost ♪

♪ Lost in your own life ♪

Whoa!

Wow, you guys. That was great.

Ah, it's all in the genes.

Wait. What time is it? Did we miss the whole show?

Ah, I've got another one at 10:00.

Cognac?

Trying to cut back.

By the way, you were pretty good out there tonight.

Thank you. I mean, considering.

Considering what?

You clearly haven't been working on your moves.

My moves? Uh-huh.

My moves rocked, unlike your stupid karate kicks.

Oh, you're just jealous

because I can still get my feet over my head.

Of course you can. Your head is only

four feet from the ground.

Hey, you guys, listen.

We want the Rockits! They're calling for me.

We want the Rockits! Us.

We want the Rockits!

Here. We want the Rockits!

We want the Rockits!

Listen, since you've come here,

my boys are happier,

my wife has a new accomplice,

and, uh, David and I are closer

than we've been in 20 years.

What I'm trying to say is,

I am on to you.

Oh, yes.

All right. Come on, guys.

School for some, work for others.

So, our high school's the Fighting Manatees?

Aren't manatees docile, passive creatures?

As is our football team.

Hey, guys. Morning.

Hey, David, what are you doing here?

Well, it's your first day of school,

and I made you some lunch.

Prime rib and shrimp cocktail.

And a virgin daiquiri.

Thanks.

I can't believe you're up this early.

Up? I haven't been to bed yet.

How do people live like this?

Hey, bro.

Hey, P, guess what?

I got a huge offer

from the casino last night... for the both of us.

Oh, well, that's flattering,

but last night was a one-shot deal.

How huge?

We'll talk later.

And, Ruby,

I just want you to know that

I'm really gonna be there for you.

That's great, 'cause parent-teacher night is on Wednesday.

Wednesday.

Wednesdays are bad.

I can move stuff around.

Great. Bye, Dad.

She called me Dad.

I know.

I'm gonna have to talk to her about that.

♪ And I want you to know ♪

♪ You're never alone ♪

♪ You'll always have a place to go ♪

♪ It's on the brighter side ♪

♪ I'll color your night, and I'll lead you to light ♪

♪ Put hope inside for you to fight ♪

♪ You don't have to be lost ♪

♪ Lost in your own ♪

♪ Life ♪

♪ Li-Li-Life ♪

♪ Lost in your own ♪

♪ Life ♪

♪ Li-Li-Life ♪

♪ Lost in your own ♪

♪ Life ♪

♪ Li-Li-Life ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la ♪