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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,016 --> 00:00:01,733 Every night, I have the same dream. 2 00:00:06,570 --> 00:00:08,233 It's the night I got arrested. 3 00:00:09,516 --> 00:00:11,015 The night of the final episode 4 00:00:11,050 --> 00:00:13,684 of "American Idol," season one. 5 00:00:25,931 --> 00:00:27,931 ♪ Go Justin, go Justin ♪ 6 00:00:27,967 --> 00:00:30,033 ♪ My main man, my main man ♪ 7 00:00:32,671 --> 00:00:34,213 Oh, yeah 8 00:00:36,639 --> 00:00:38,473 Oh! 9 00:00:38,508 --> 00:00:40,875 Look at my man, cooking food. 10 00:00:40,900 --> 00:00:42,366 - Get it, boy. - You know that. 11 00:00:42,401 --> 00:00:43,434 Yes! 12 00:00:43,469 --> 00:00:44,902 I love cooking for my boo. 13 00:00:44,937 --> 00:00:46,428 And I love you for that shit. 14 00:00:46,428 --> 00:00:47,786 Thank you, baby. 15 00:00:47,786 --> 00:00:50,427 I just want your booty to get as big as humanly possible. 16 00:00:50,562 --> 00:00:52,562 Boy, you crazy. You dumb as hell. 17 00:00:52,598 --> 00:00:54,097 No, I'm serious. 18 00:00:54,132 --> 00:00:56,533 I want it to look like one of them cartoon centaurs. 19 00:00:56,568 --> 00:00:57,901 You know, half man, half horse. 20 00:00:58,133 --> 00:01:00,200 So you want some of that magical booty. 21 00:01:00,530 --> 00:01:02,395 Some of that mythological ass. 22 00:01:03,495 --> 00:01:04,894 You been reading Greek mythology, boy? 23 00:01:04,930 --> 00:01:07,630 Yes, yes, yes. You got me. 24 00:01:07,666 --> 00:01:10,291 Ooh, the show about to start. Shut up, shut up. 25 00:01:10,669 --> 00:01:13,695 I'm calling it right now, Justin gonna win. 26 00:01:13,732 --> 00:01:16,539 Boy, please. Kelly is way more talented. 27 00:01:16,575 --> 00:01:18,274 Unh-unh, that boy got pure talent. 28 00:01:18,310 --> 00:01:20,042 Look at him. Look at him. 29 00:01:20,337 --> 00:01:21,803 His voice is butter. 30 00:01:25,957 --> 00:01:27,310 You're so silly. 31 00:01:28,084 --> 00:01:29,550 I love you, Shay. 32 00:01:29,586 --> 00:01:31,149 Mm. I love you, too. 33 00:01:35,558 --> 00:01:37,011 Tray. Hmm? 34 00:01:37,293 --> 00:01:39,025 - We need to talk. - About what? 35 00:01:39,329 --> 00:01:40,855 I got... 36 00:01:41,097 --> 00:01:42,951 Let me get up. 37 00:01:43,214 --> 00:01:44,133 What? 38 00:01:44,868 --> 00:01:45,966 Tray, don't! 39 00:01:48,438 --> 00:01:50,671 Shay, just Tivo that for me. I'll be right back. 40 00:01:50,707 --> 00:01:52,037 Tray, you promised me. 41 00:01:52,037 --> 00:01:53,674 I'm gonna go get a blunt and a candy bar. 42 00:01:53,710 --> 00:01:54,846 I'll be right back. 43 00:01:55,979 --> 00:01:57,678 Are you serious, Tray? 44 00:01:58,848 --> 00:02:00,129 Wait for me! 45 00:02:03,653 --> 00:02:04,719 You got me? 46 00:02:04,754 --> 00:02:06,316 Come on, you know I got you, son. 47 00:02:07,144 --> 00:02:09,340 Bobby, who was badder, Michael or Vito? 48 00:02:09,651 --> 00:02:11,716 - In "Godfather," man. - Vito. 49 00:02:12,162 --> 00:02:14,595 Wrong. I'm gonna give you another shot on the way back. 50 00:02:14,631 --> 00:02:15,737 Think about it. 51 00:02:16,232 --> 00:02:17,965 Yo, why you embarrassing me right now? 52 00:02:18,001 --> 00:02:19,233 You embarrassing me. 53 00:02:19,269 --> 00:02:20,890 Yo, I told you to watch it three times. 54 00:02:29,362 --> 00:02:32,180 - Papa! - Yeah, my friend? 55 00:02:32,215 --> 00:02:34,145 - Give me the usual. - Mm. 56 00:02:35,185 --> 00:02:36,884 Guarini's gonna win tonight. 57 00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:38,286 No, no, no, you're wrong. 58 00:02:38,321 --> 00:02:40,788 Watch, his curls is looking kind of tight. 59 00:02:40,824 --> 00:02:42,083 Too tight, huh? 60 00:02:42,460 --> 00:02:44,225 Yeah, well, just make sure you where you're supposed 61 00:02:44,260 --> 00:02:46,452 to be at is all I'm saying. All right. 62 00:02:51,100 --> 00:02:52,333 What's up, Wavy? 63 00:02:52,502 --> 00:02:53,601 Dinner's ready. 64 00:02:53,636 --> 00:02:55,127 Five girls, five boys. 65 00:02:56,334 --> 00:02:58,238 Give me 20 minutes. Watch this, baby. 66 00:02:59,312 --> 00:03:00,975 Don't get cocky, nigga. 67 00:03:05,748 --> 00:03:07,816 Yo, Tivo that for me, Shay! 68 00:03:11,765 --> 00:03:14,056 Yo, Tray! Michael! 69 00:03:14,424 --> 00:03:15,604 Michael's badder. 70 00:03:15,896 --> 00:03:16,891 Why? 71 00:03:16,926 --> 00:03:19,651 Uh, 'cause he's not Vito. 72 00:03:20,163 --> 00:03:21,596 Keep trying! 73 00:03:25,641 --> 00:03:27,947 Uh, the kid is bugged out. 74 00:03:28,138 --> 00:03:29,537 Hey, what's up? 75 00:03:29,572 --> 00:03:30,571 Boy, girl? 76 00:03:32,342 --> 00:03:33,274 Aww, shit! 77 00:03:33,309 --> 00:03:34,809 - Your hands in the air! - Aw! 78 00:03:34,844 --> 00:03:35,810 Hands up, man! Come on! 79 00:03:35,845 --> 00:03:37,278 NYPD! Put 'em up! 80 00:03:37,313 --> 00:03:39,814 - Hands up! - Keep 'em up! Keep 'em up! 81 00:03:39,849 --> 00:03:41,272 Keep them up! 82 00:03:42,252 --> 00:03:44,206 You have the right to remain silent. 83 00:03:50,493 --> 00:03:52,284 Ca caw! 84 00:04:01,104 --> 00:04:02,837 Do you understand your rights at this time? 85 00:04:02,872 --> 00:04:04,697 I didn't do nothing! 86 00:04:11,281 --> 00:04:13,648 Sha-a-a-a-a-y! 87 00:04:13,877 --> 00:04:16,440 _ 88 00:04:20,087 --> 00:04:21,901 That was 15 years ago. 89 00:04:22,806 --> 00:04:24,644 I haven't seen my girl since. 90 00:04:25,121 --> 00:04:27,031 Prison will change a man. 91 00:04:27,503 --> 00:04:28,829 I'm wiser now. 92 00:04:28,865 --> 00:04:30,516 But still, I remain humble. 93 00:04:31,449 --> 00:04:34,384 I also might be the best chef the world has ever known. 94 00:04:34,419 --> 00:04:36,853 You gonna give up that recipe before you go? 95 00:04:37,187 --> 00:04:39,989 If you give a man a fish, he eats dinner. 96 00:04:40,025 --> 00:04:41,324 But if you teach a man to fish... 97 00:04:41,359 --> 00:04:42,959 Yo, yo, there's fish in it? 98 00:04:42,994 --> 00:04:44,794 I'm doing a proverb [BLEEP] 99 00:04:50,235 --> 00:04:51,601 Prison pad Thai. 100 00:04:51,636 --> 00:04:53,303 Don't go overboard on the peanut butter. 101 00:04:53,338 --> 00:04:54,739 Two packets are too much. 102 00:05:00,312 --> 00:05:02,278 Now it's time for me to go out to the world 103 00:05:02,314 --> 00:05:04,824 and make it a better place with my sage advice. 104 00:05:05,050 --> 00:05:06,649 Barker, you ready? 105 00:05:06,685 --> 00:05:09,018 Ready as your mother was after I sucked her titties 106 00:05:09,054 --> 00:05:10,553 last night, Wilson. 107 00:05:14,526 --> 00:05:16,492 Don't let us see you back here, Tray. 108 00:05:16,528 --> 00:05:18,328 Man, I just want to take a shower by myself. 109 00:05:18,363 --> 00:05:20,630 I never want to see another penis in my life, 110 00:05:20,665 --> 00:05:21,798 not even my own. 111 00:05:21,833 --> 00:05:24,734 Tray! We gonna miss that food, Tray! 112 00:05:24,769 --> 00:05:27,737 Y'all don't deserve my food, you honey bunny eating [BLEEP] 113 00:05:27,772 --> 00:05:29,973 Hey, T-Money leaving the building, y'all! 114 00:05:30,008 --> 00:05:31,307 Hey, give it up! 115 00:05:36,715 --> 00:05:39,549 Second chances are a beautiful thing. 116 00:05:39,584 --> 00:05:41,718 When I went away, my neighborhood was hanging on 117 00:05:41,753 --> 00:05:43,987 by a thread thanks to dealers like me. 118 00:05:44,022 --> 00:05:47,156 This time, I'm gonna be a force for positive change. 119 00:05:47,192 --> 00:05:49,617 This time, I'ma do it right. 120 00:05:51,306 --> 00:05:53,701 Synced and corrected by louvette www.addic7ed.com 121 00:06:16,939 --> 00:06:19,139 - Watch it! - I'm sorry, my bad. 122 00:06:19,174 --> 00:06:20,774 It's not Michelin-starred, it's Michelin-rated. 123 00:06:20,809 --> 00:06:22,309 It's a huge difference. 124 00:06:22,344 --> 00:06:24,781 Honey, have some seaweed. Open up. 125 00:06:24,925 --> 00:06:26,658 Seaweed is alkalizing. 126 00:06:26,698 --> 00:06:28,129 Yes, it's good for digestion. 127 00:06:28,217 --> 00:06:30,090 [BLEEP] happened to Brooklyn?! 128 00:06:30,137 --> 00:06:31,476 Brooklyn! 129 00:06:35,882 --> 00:06:36,847 Damn. 130 00:06:36,872 --> 00:06:38,358 Papi's is gone, too. 131 00:06:47,408 --> 00:06:49,542 Y'all little nigga slingin', huh? 132 00:06:49,577 --> 00:06:50,877 Chasing that paper? 133 00:06:50,877 --> 00:06:52,965 Huh? Get that money, huh? 134 00:06:53,396 --> 00:06:55,812 Then what, huh? 135 00:06:56,104 --> 00:06:57,337 You see me? 136 00:06:57,371 --> 00:06:59,598 I used to be just like y'all little niggas, man. 137 00:06:59,598 --> 00:07:01,131 Just like y'all. 138 00:07:01,165 --> 00:07:03,365 Boom, plot twist. 139 00:07:03,401 --> 00:07:05,467 I got locked up for 15 years. 140 00:07:05,503 --> 00:07:06,969 15 years! 141 00:07:07,233 --> 00:07:10,350 Y'all little niggas need to check your own potential, man. 142 00:07:10,350 --> 00:07:12,888 - Y'all little niggas need... - Actually, sorry to interrupt. 143 00:07:12,913 --> 00:07:14,448 We're just waiting for our friend. 144 00:07:14,473 --> 00:07:17,328 Aah! Let's go to brunch, bitches! 145 00:07:17,427 --> 00:07:19,091 Aah! Come on, bitch! 146 00:07:20,064 --> 00:07:22,998 Oh, my God, that guy was just acting so weird just now. 147 00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:29,230 Wow. 148 00:07:29,570 --> 00:07:31,303 Shay done pulled a George Jefferson 149 00:07:31,339 --> 00:07:32,497 and moved on up. 150 00:07:40,548 --> 00:07:43,182 Damn, there she is. Looking beautiful. 151 00:07:45,119 --> 00:07:46,979 - Josh? - Coffee? 152 00:07:48,096 --> 00:07:49,628 Oh, she got a roommate. 153 00:07:49,665 --> 00:07:51,131 - There you go. - Thank you. 154 00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:52,466 Mwah. 155 00:07:58,140 --> 00:08:00,479 A white dude?! 156 00:08:00,504 --> 00:08:01,689 Aah! 157 00:08:11,159 --> 00:08:12,325 Dicklicker? 158 00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:15,073 Tray Barker. I'm new. I'm coming in from Southfield. 159 00:08:15,397 --> 00:08:17,196 Come on in, Dicklicker. 160 00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:22,389 So check this out. So I catch up to him, right? 161 00:08:22,389 --> 00:08:24,489 And then I grab him by the back of his head 162 00:08:24,525 --> 00:08:26,458 and tear out three of them grey-ass dreadlocks. 163 00:08:26,733 --> 00:08:28,093 And I say, "Hey, brother." 164 00:08:28,128 --> 00:08:30,062 Look like you outta locks." 165 00:08:32,399 --> 00:08:33,832 You get it? Out of locks. 166 00:08:33,867 --> 00:08:35,667 And that's right off the head. 167 00:08:35,703 --> 00:08:36,968 That's... that's the improv class. 168 00:08:37,004 --> 00:08:38,336 Yo, money grip. This the halfway house 169 00:08:38,372 --> 00:08:40,405 or open mic for fat, black dudes? 170 00:08:40,441 --> 00:08:41,635 Who in here is Mullins? 171 00:08:42,409 --> 00:08:43,875 I'm Mullins, Dicklicker. 172 00:08:43,996 --> 00:08:45,628 I just did 15 years in prison, 173 00:08:45,653 --> 00:08:47,019 and I ain't licked a dick once. 174 00:08:47,054 --> 00:08:48,654 And I ain't gonna start with you, Al Roker. 175 00:08:53,127 --> 00:08:55,085 Orientation in my office now. 176 00:08:56,990 --> 00:08:58,289 See this place? 177 00:08:58,529 --> 00:09:00,191 This is my castle. 178 00:09:00,226 --> 00:09:01,793 A'ight? I'm the king. 179 00:09:01,828 --> 00:09:03,928 Yeah, well, your castle smell like a group of Jamaicans 180 00:09:03,964 --> 00:09:05,430 in an elevator, slap-boxing. 181 00:09:05,465 --> 00:09:07,565 I like... I like that. I like wittiness. 182 00:09:07,601 --> 00:09:09,467 I like the fact that you think you funny, 183 00:09:09,502 --> 00:09:12,117 but you ain't funny as me, so don't you worry about that. 184 00:09:12,142 --> 00:09:13,753 What you have to understand 185 00:09:13,778 --> 00:09:16,488 is that this well-oiled facility, 186 00:09:16,513 --> 00:09:18,042 I oversee all this. 187 00:09:21,437 --> 00:09:22,663 Don't worry about that. 188 00:09:22,843 --> 00:09:23,890 I'll get that later. 189 00:09:24,620 --> 00:09:27,208 All you need to know are the rules. 190 00:09:27,374 --> 00:09:28,555 Rule number one 191 00:09:28,899 --> 00:09:31,808 is all common areas need to stay clean. 192 00:09:32,081 --> 00:09:33,781 Two, make up your bed. 193 00:09:33,816 --> 00:09:36,450 Three, never find yourself in trouble. 194 00:09:36,485 --> 00:09:39,125 Four, no playing with your plantain. 195 00:09:39,288 --> 00:09:41,755 Five, no fornicating after 4:00. 196 00:09:41,791 --> 00:09:45,860 And Six, always make your curfew, otherwise, you out. 197 00:09:45,895 --> 00:09:48,896 I just found out the woman that I love is with a white dude. 198 00:09:48,931 --> 00:09:50,931 Look like a Duke lacrosse player. 199 00:09:50,967 --> 00:09:52,099 What, you surprised? 200 00:09:52,134 --> 00:09:54,001 You thought she was just gonna wait for you? 201 00:09:55,342 --> 00:09:56,904 Shit, man. 202 00:09:56,939 --> 00:09:59,874 I'm gonna say this to you, and this is not 203 00:09:59,909 --> 00:10:02,777 a sexist comment at all, but all women 204 00:10:03,021 --> 00:10:04,454 are petty as [BLEEP] 205 00:10:04,489 --> 00:10:05,922 Hell no, not Shay! 206 00:10:06,175 --> 00:10:07,899 Okay? She's my queen. 207 00:10:08,610 --> 00:10:10,109 She just got lost. 208 00:10:10,145 --> 00:10:13,512 Yeah, she got lost on another man's bouncy house. 209 00:10:13,774 --> 00:10:15,908 Why everything with you gotta be about dick? 210 00:10:15,943 --> 00:10:18,711 What?! The phallus is the number one piece 211 00:10:18,746 --> 00:10:20,947 of universal comedy gold. 212 00:10:21,336 --> 00:10:22,893 Everybody love a good dick joke. 213 00:10:23,150 --> 00:10:24,783 You know it's like Tom, Dick, and Harry. 214 00:10:24,819 --> 00:10:25,985 You heard about that, right? 215 00:10:26,020 --> 00:10:27,286 Nobody gives a shit about Harry. 216 00:10:27,321 --> 00:10:28,387 Everybody want to know who Dick is. 217 00:10:28,422 --> 00:10:30,589 I'm not here to laugh, okay? 218 00:10:30,625 --> 00:10:31,807 I'm here to inspire. 219 00:10:32,526 --> 00:10:34,193 I'm hear to teach young, at-risk kids 220 00:10:34,228 --> 00:10:36,729 on the verge of making the same mistake... 221 00:10:36,764 --> 00:10:38,130 as you did. Ah, come on, man. 222 00:10:38,165 --> 00:10:39,965 You don't think I haven't heard this before? 223 00:10:40,001 --> 00:10:42,075 You just another dusty-ass street prophet. 224 00:10:42,703 --> 00:10:45,638 Every fool-ass convict come through that door 225 00:10:45,673 --> 00:10:47,940 think that they Laurence Fishburne 226 00:10:47,975 --> 00:10:49,275 in "Boyz N the Hood." 227 00:10:49,385 --> 00:10:51,443 Then they find out the 'hood gone. 228 00:10:51,479 --> 00:10:53,412 Man, the neighborhood's been gentrified. 229 00:10:53,447 --> 00:10:55,376 What you need to be concerned with 230 00:10:55,516 --> 00:10:58,183 is getting caught in some recidivism. 231 00:10:58,219 --> 00:10:59,184 Some what? 232 00:10:59,220 --> 00:11:00,741 Re-cid-ivism. 233 00:11:00,741 --> 00:11:02,121 Recidivism. 234 00:11:03,013 --> 00:11:04,360 That's what I said. 235 00:11:05,826 --> 00:11:07,889 Fine. Come on, let's take a walk, man. 236 00:11:08,562 --> 00:11:11,163 Ah, don't you put your hand in [BLEEP] candy corn. 237 00:11:11,198 --> 00:11:12,498 Don't touch my shit. 238 00:11:12,767 --> 00:11:14,934 At the same time, we need to, spiritually speaking... 239 00:11:14,969 --> 00:11:16,502 - Okay. - ...focus on how we contribute 240 00:11:16,537 --> 00:11:17,770 - two cents... - Here they go. 241 00:11:17,805 --> 00:11:19,305 Here they go right here. This is exactly 242 00:11:19,340 --> 00:11:20,606 what I'm talking about, Barker. 243 00:11:20,641 --> 00:11:22,374 Too many mentors. Not enough mentees. 244 00:11:22,410 --> 00:11:23,976 Jaybird, Felony, meet Tray. 245 00:11:24,011 --> 00:11:24,977 - 'Sup? - 'Sup? 246 00:11:25,012 --> 00:11:26,679 'Sup? I look forward to guiding y'all 247 00:11:26,714 --> 00:11:28,113 on your personal journeys. 248 00:11:28,149 --> 00:11:29,815 You can guide me, but you can walk with me... 249 00:11:29,850 --> 00:11:31,517 But what is a journey but a beginning, middle, and end... 250 00:11:31,552 --> 00:11:32,885 Shut the [BLEEP] up. Come on. 251 00:11:32,920 --> 00:11:36,221 This is the barracks. You're bunk number five. 252 00:11:36,395 --> 00:11:39,391 Name's Erwin, but everybody call me Big Country. 253 00:11:39,427 --> 00:11:40,592 Big Country? 254 00:11:40,626 --> 00:11:41,961 Well, we gonna have to swap bunks, man. 255 00:11:41,996 --> 00:11:43,429 I'm not trying to die tonight. 256 00:11:43,464 --> 00:11:45,230 You're funny, man. 257 00:11:45,266 --> 00:11:47,900 Funny? What the hell? You want to hear some funny? 258 00:11:47,935 --> 00:11:49,735 All right, I got a good one for you right here. 259 00:11:49,770 --> 00:11:52,821 What's the difference between a hard-on and a Bugatti? 260 00:11:54,175 --> 00:11:55,808 I don't have a Bugatti. 261 00:11:59,622 --> 00:12:01,947 You mean to tell me you got an erection right now? 262 00:12:01,983 --> 00:12:03,582 No. You know what? 263 00:12:03,617 --> 00:12:05,851 You got one week to find a job, otherwise, you outta here. 264 00:12:05,886 --> 00:12:07,252 I ain't got no damn erection. 265 00:12:07,288 --> 00:12:08,854 Ask me about no erection. 266 00:12:08,889 --> 00:12:11,357 If that thing lasts more than four hours, call a doctor. 267 00:12:11,392 --> 00:12:13,748 What up, Big Country? 268 00:12:13,773 --> 00:12:15,095 What's up, Tray? 269 00:12:24,171 --> 00:12:25,235 I love you. 270 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:27,629 I love you, baby. 271 00:12:28,376 --> 00:12:30,024 Can I make love to her? 272 00:12:30,211 --> 00:12:31,443 No, man! 273 00:12:31,683 --> 00:12:33,115 Get out my face, man. 274 00:12:33,151 --> 00:12:35,603 Get your nuts out my face, please. 275 00:12:36,114 --> 00:12:37,187 Gustavo. 276 00:12:37,187 --> 00:12:39,190 Yeah, thank you, Gustavo. Please leave. 277 00:12:42,215 --> 00:12:43,224 Now! 278 00:12:43,259 --> 00:12:44,982 Okay, okay. 279 00:12:54,270 --> 00:12:55,464 Damn, Clyde. 280 00:12:56,696 --> 00:12:58,396 When I heard you got murdered, man, 281 00:12:58,431 --> 00:13:00,601 I cried for days in my cell, man. 282 00:13:02,943 --> 00:13:04,221 I should have been there. 283 00:13:04,404 --> 00:13:06,971 Now it seem like the whole world done moved on, man. 284 00:13:07,526 --> 00:13:09,740 I feel like Rip Van Winkle in this [BLEEP] 285 00:13:09,776 --> 00:13:11,578 and I don't even know who he is! 286 00:13:12,489 --> 00:13:14,597 But I know if you was here, 287 00:13:15,851 --> 00:13:17,584 you'd probably say some shit like... 288 00:13:17,619 --> 00:13:18,846 Yo, Tray! 289 00:13:19,721 --> 00:13:20,854 Clyde?! 290 00:13:20,889 --> 00:13:22,261 Yo, behind you! 291 00:13:24,359 --> 00:13:25,458 Clyde?! 292 00:13:25,494 --> 00:13:27,273 Nah, man, it's me, Bobby. 293 00:13:27,662 --> 00:13:28,826 Clyde's little brother. 294 00:13:28,826 --> 00:13:30,276 Oh, that's what's up. 295 00:13:33,828 --> 00:13:34,953 Tray? 296 00:13:36,863 --> 00:13:38,033 Fredo! 297 00:13:39,728 --> 00:13:40,822 What's that? 298 00:13:40,847 --> 00:13:42,313 Michael killed Fredo, his own brother. 299 00:13:42,725 --> 00:13:44,791 That's what made him badder, you know what I'm saying? 300 00:13:44,827 --> 00:13:47,569 You remember asking me who was badder in "Godfather," 301 00:13:47,569 --> 00:13:48,707 Michael or Vito. 302 00:13:49,539 --> 00:13:50,867 - I remember. - Yeah. 303 00:13:51,807 --> 00:13:53,274 That's when he became a villain. 304 00:13:54,177 --> 00:13:56,743 You never sacrifice your family for the life. 305 00:13:56,980 --> 00:13:58,756 Yeah, that's real right there, son. 306 00:14:00,335 --> 00:14:02,750 The last time I saw you, you were... 307 00:14:02,785 --> 00:14:04,155 Like 14, 15. 308 00:14:04,254 --> 00:14:05,920 Yeah, now look at you, man. 309 00:14:05,955 --> 00:14:08,489 Looking like a broke-ass Tupac... One-pac. 310 00:14:08,525 --> 00:14:10,057 Oh, oh, okay. 311 00:14:10,093 --> 00:14:12,527 All right, well, um, you the one out here looking elderly. 312 00:14:12,562 --> 00:14:13,961 - No. - Looking like 313 00:14:13,997 --> 00:14:15,830 you passing out from calcium deficiency. 314 00:14:15,865 --> 00:14:17,665 You looking like Sgt. Slaughter's 315 00:14:17,700 --> 00:14:18,866 illegitimate son. 316 00:14:18,902 --> 00:14:21,328 You look like, uh, Chicken George 317 00:14:21,604 --> 00:14:23,638 at the end of "Roots." 318 00:14:23,673 --> 00:14:25,406 You got one arm longer than the other, 319 00:14:25,441 --> 00:14:26,741 and you clap like this. 320 00:14:26,776 --> 00:14:29,143 Oh, okay. So, is that you? 321 00:14:29,179 --> 00:14:31,371 - 'Cause you smell so bad... - Shut up, man! 322 00:14:31,428 --> 00:14:32,808 I got a gland problem. 323 00:14:34,384 --> 00:14:35,550 My... My bad. 324 00:14:35,585 --> 00:14:37,752 I thought you outgrow that type of stuff. 325 00:14:37,787 --> 00:14:39,620 I ain't... I ain't... 326 00:14:39,656 --> 00:14:40,741 What you been doing? 327 00:14:41,256 --> 00:14:42,789 Well, you know, I'm doing the same old same. 328 00:14:42,823 --> 00:14:45,205 You know, business been slow, weed game is kind of... 329 00:14:45,434 --> 00:14:47,051 - It's been tight, man. - Still slingin'? 330 00:14:47,903 --> 00:14:49,269 You gonna end up in prison, Bobby. 331 00:14:49,304 --> 00:14:51,204 Look, ain't nobody scared of jail. 332 00:14:51,239 --> 00:14:53,273 Look, I know mad people in there. 333 00:14:53,308 --> 00:14:55,208 Plus, all they do is rap and work out. 334 00:14:55,373 --> 00:14:59,014 In prison, as pretty as you are, you would be a perfect 10. 335 00:15:00,359 --> 00:15:01,481 Thank you, man. 336 00:15:01,516 --> 00:15:03,832 That's... that's not good, Bobby. 337 00:15:04,086 --> 00:15:07,454 They will turn your butthole into a parking garage. 338 00:15:07,606 --> 00:15:10,056 Start putting all kind of cars in there, man. 339 00:15:10,092 --> 00:15:13,409 Buicks, Cutlass Sierras, Oldsmobiles. 340 00:15:13,895 --> 00:15:15,628 Somebody gonna put a Hummer in there. 341 00:15:15,664 --> 00:15:17,397 You don't want nobody parking no Hummer in there. 342 00:15:17,432 --> 00:15:19,299 - I don't want no Hummer. - No, man. 343 00:15:19,334 --> 00:15:21,468 You don't want your rectum turned into 344 00:15:21,503 --> 00:15:22,635 a parking garage, man. 345 00:15:22,671 --> 00:15:23,931 That's not what you want. 346 00:15:24,797 --> 00:15:27,184 You don't want nobody parking no Hummer in there, man. 347 00:15:28,110 --> 00:15:29,517 This is my neighborhood, man. 348 00:15:29,911 --> 00:15:31,097 Things done changed. 349 00:15:31,749 --> 00:15:33,541 Just like "Planet of the Apes," man. 350 00:15:34,579 --> 00:15:35,722 Weird. 351 00:15:36,181 --> 00:15:39,551 Like when Zira was talking to Dr. Zaius, and she said, 352 00:15:39,641 --> 00:15:41,853 "What do you think they'll find out there, Doctor?" 353 00:15:41,853 --> 00:15:44,020 And he said, "Their destiny." 354 00:15:46,224 --> 00:15:47,891 The worst part is with Shay, man. 355 00:15:47,926 --> 00:15:49,696 She done moved on and got a new man. 356 00:15:49,721 --> 00:15:51,228 Hey, what is you talking about? 357 00:15:51,263 --> 00:15:53,935 What happened to the dude that I knew, that I idolized? 358 00:15:54,266 --> 00:15:56,232 You Big Tray Diesel, man. 359 00:15:56,232 --> 00:15:57,824 Go get your girl, Tray. 360 00:15:59,234 --> 00:16:00,833 I wouldn't even know where to begin. 361 00:16:00,870 --> 00:16:02,136 Look, we do it like everybody else. 362 00:16:02,171 --> 00:16:03,837 We start from the beginning. 363 00:16:03,873 --> 00:16:04,838 With God. 364 00:16:04,874 --> 00:16:05,778 No. 365 00:16:06,554 --> 00:16:07,818 The Internet. 366 00:16:30,071 --> 00:16:31,432 Shay Shay. 367 00:16:32,134 --> 00:16:34,855 Welcome, everyone, and thank you so much for being here. 368 00:16:35,602 --> 00:16:37,360 I'm gonna bring it down for a sec. 369 00:16:38,295 --> 00:16:40,302 The U.S. has over 370 00:16:40,327 --> 00:16:42,748 600,000 homeless. 371 00:16:43,084 --> 00:16:44,684 These are our friends. 372 00:16:45,082 --> 00:16:46,752 Our family members. 373 00:16:46,788 --> 00:16:47,787 Our... 374 00:16:50,625 --> 00:16:52,125 Ex-convicts. 375 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:53,993 Doing time in the house! 376 00:16:54,028 --> 00:16:55,404 They are us. 377 00:16:55,830 --> 00:16:57,396 That is why I am so very proud 378 00:16:57,432 --> 00:16:59,932 to be a part of the Rest Easy Initiative. 379 00:16:59,968 --> 00:17:01,579 You tell 'em, Shay! 380 00:17:02,421 --> 00:17:05,121 We've already raised enough money to buy 381 00:17:05,156 --> 00:17:07,089 over 2,000 brand-new beds. 382 00:17:07,124 --> 00:17:08,390 Yes, yes, y'all! 383 00:17:08,426 --> 00:17:10,683 But there is so much more that we can do. 384 00:17:10,708 --> 00:17:11,694 I heard that. 385 00:17:11,729 --> 00:17:14,934 We will eradicate homelessness. 386 00:17:14,934 --> 00:17:15,974 Damn right. 387 00:17:15,974 --> 00:17:17,807 One bed at a time. 388 00:17:17,842 --> 00:17:19,209 Thank you. 389 00:17:19,244 --> 00:17:20,743 You're welcome. 390 00:17:20,779 --> 00:17:22,259 Thank you so much. 391 00:17:27,085 --> 00:17:28,942 That was quite the speech, Shannon. 392 00:17:28,983 --> 00:17:30,354 So articulate. 393 00:17:30,684 --> 00:17:32,551 You should think about politics. 394 00:17:32,586 --> 00:17:33,819 - Excuse me. - You have a gift. 395 00:17:33,854 --> 00:17:35,587 I'll let you guys finish in just two seconds. 396 00:17:35,623 --> 00:17:37,656 Shay, I just want to say it's me, Tray. 397 00:17:37,691 --> 00:17:39,458 I'm back. And I just want to say, 398 00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:40,974 you know, even though you didn't come visit me, 399 00:17:41,073 --> 00:17:42,857 15 years I was incarcerated, 400 00:17:43,508 --> 00:17:44,693 all is forgiven. 401 00:17:45,403 --> 00:17:46,610 Come here and give me some love. 402 00:17:50,371 --> 00:17:53,569 Tray, you are quite the funny man. 403 00:17:53,958 --> 00:17:55,892 You know, he's one of our former homeless. 404 00:17:56,252 --> 00:17:58,394 Can you excuse us for just a second? 405 00:17:58,429 --> 00:17:59,643 Indeed. 406 00:17:59,797 --> 00:18:01,430 - Come on, Shay, come on. - Shh! 407 00:18:01,466 --> 00:18:04,055 This is velour, man. This is velour! 408 00:18:04,689 --> 00:18:07,003 You all pink champagne'd up now, huh? 409 00:18:07,154 --> 00:18:08,225 Nigga, 410 00:18:08,590 --> 00:18:11,351 you got some nerve thinking you can crash my event. 411 00:18:11,709 --> 00:18:12,882 How dare you! 412 00:18:12,999 --> 00:18:14,605 Damn, hello to you, too. 413 00:18:15,413 --> 00:18:18,349 - Shannon? - I tried to stop him, Shannon. 414 00:18:19,183 --> 00:18:20,783 Everything good? You okay? 415 00:18:20,987 --> 00:18:23,121 She all right, home boy. I'm gonna send her to you soon. 416 00:18:23,156 --> 00:18:25,123 I'm sorry, are we gonna have to tussle, hombre? 417 00:18:25,158 --> 00:18:28,093 Tussle? Hombre? What the [BLEEP] is this, "West Side Story"? 418 00:18:28,128 --> 00:18:29,333 - Josh. - Yeah? 419 00:18:29,333 --> 00:18:31,600 Sweetie bear, please wait for me inside. 420 00:18:31,634 --> 00:18:33,434 Yeah, go on in and have some of that pink stuff. 421 00:18:33,469 --> 00:18:34,702 It looked delicious. 422 00:18:34,737 --> 00:18:36,537 - I got this. - Hey, I'm watching you. 423 00:18:36,572 --> 00:18:38,286 I'm watching you, too, mangina. 424 00:18:38,574 --> 00:18:40,165 I am not a mangina. 425 00:18:40,476 --> 00:18:42,010 I'm just a regular man. 426 00:18:46,382 --> 00:18:48,189 At last by ourselves. 427 00:18:50,142 --> 00:18:51,485 15 years you been outta my life, 428 00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:52,686 you think you're just gonna be able 429 00:18:52,722 --> 00:18:54,321 to walk right back in it, huh? 430 00:18:54,357 --> 00:18:55,322 Hell no! 431 00:18:55,358 --> 00:18:56,457 There's the old Shay. 432 00:18:56,492 --> 00:18:58,726 I got by Shannon now, not Shay. 433 00:18:58,761 --> 00:19:00,761 You calling yourself by your government name now? 434 00:19:00,796 --> 00:19:04,331 Bitch, do you know how hard I had to work 435 00:19:04,367 --> 00:19:05,766 to pull myself up out the gutter? 436 00:19:05,801 --> 00:19:07,368 How long did it take for you to marry 437 00:19:07,403 --> 00:19:08,369 that white man in there? 438 00:19:08,404 --> 00:19:09,882 Josh is a good man. 439 00:19:10,673 --> 00:19:12,473 He writes voiceovers for Anthony Bourdain. 440 00:19:12,508 --> 00:19:13,774 Yeah, but do you love him, though? 441 00:19:13,809 --> 00:19:15,015 Yes, I do. 442 00:19:21,415 --> 00:19:22,435 Mom! 443 00:19:22,650 --> 00:19:24,572 Amira's trying to poison me with peanuts. 444 00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:26,318 I am not. Yes, you are! 445 00:19:26,354 --> 00:19:29,388 Amira, Shahzad, go inside with your father now. 446 00:19:29,718 --> 00:19:31,184 Are you okay? I'm fine. 447 00:19:31,220 --> 00:19:33,305 Go inside right now. 448 00:19:38,375 --> 00:19:39,526 Tray, I know what you want to say. 449 00:19:39,561 --> 00:19:40,942 How old are they? 450 00:19:41,096 --> 00:19:42,462 - 15. - Twins? 451 00:19:42,668 --> 00:19:44,798 - Tray... - Scientifically speaking, 452 00:19:44,833 --> 00:19:47,501 how did you and a Caucasian man make two kids 453 00:19:47,536 --> 00:19:49,770 whose last name could be Wesley and Snipes? 454 00:19:49,805 --> 00:19:52,109 Good night, Shannon! 455 00:19:52,134 --> 00:19:54,441 Good night, Mr. and Mrs. Washington. 456 00:19:54,476 --> 00:19:55,976 Your support is appreciated. 457 00:19:56,011 --> 00:19:59,546 When I get home, I'm going to write you a very large check! 458 00:19:59,581 --> 00:20:01,381 Oh, you are so kind. 459 00:20:02,776 --> 00:20:04,242 Listen to me, Tray. 460 00:20:04,277 --> 00:20:06,181 Those kids didn't grow up the way that we did. 461 00:20:06,206 --> 00:20:08,688 They got nice friends. They go to a nice school. 462 00:20:08,713 --> 00:20:10,729 If those are my kids, I deserve to know. 463 00:20:11,117 --> 00:20:12,584 Two, three, four... 464 00:20:14,287 --> 00:20:16,120 - Not now, Bobby! - Say what?! 465 00:20:16,156 --> 00:20:18,223 - Not right now! - This the loudest it go! 466 00:20:19,176 --> 00:20:20,701 Look, I told you not to leave. 467 00:20:20,927 --> 00:20:22,727 I told you not to go out there and sell that rock, 468 00:20:22,762 --> 00:20:24,105 but you went, anyway. 469 00:20:24,373 --> 00:20:25,639 You could have gave them Wavy. 470 00:20:25,674 --> 00:20:26,710 I don't snitch. 471 00:20:26,710 --> 00:20:28,944 And that's why I didn't tell you about the kids, Tray. 472 00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:31,412 Because wherever you go, you bring chaos! 473 00:20:31,447 --> 00:20:32,656 I don't bring chaos! 474 00:20:32,656 --> 00:20:33,647 Yes, you do! 475 00:20:33,683 --> 00:20:35,416 - Huh?! - Not now, Bobby! 476 00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:36,575 Oh, oh, okay. 477 00:20:42,820 --> 00:20:45,154 - Oh! Oh! - What happened? 478 00:20:45,189 --> 00:20:48,824 Oh, look, my bad, Tray! 479 00:20:48,860 --> 00:20:50,526 You look gorgeous, Shay! 480 00:20:50,561 --> 00:20:52,895 Um, oh, you all right, man. 481 00:20:52,930 --> 00:20:54,797 Oh, yeah, you go ahead, walk this off, baby. 482 00:20:54,832 --> 00:20:56,350 You gonna be just fine. 483 00:20:56,375 --> 00:20:57,733 God damn it, Tray! 484 00:20:58,082 --> 00:20:59,582 You ain't changed a bit! 485 00:21:00,093 --> 00:21:01,384 - He's fine! - Oh! 486 00:21:01,419 --> 00:21:04,600 Come on, come on, come on, inside. 487 00:21:12,230 --> 00:21:13,296 I'm a father. 488 00:21:14,766 --> 00:21:16,143 Harold! 489 00:21:16,401 --> 00:21:18,504 I'm a father. 490 00:21:20,909 --> 00:21:23,392 Synced and corrected by louvette www.addic7ed.com 34001

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