All language subtitles for Dharma.and.greg.S01E16.DVDRip FoV.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil) Download
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:00,500 --> 00:00:02,000 www.tvsubtitles.net 2 00:00:02,302 --> 00:00:05,032 Okay, we're all set. 3 00:00:05,105 --> 00:00:08,939 For our first romantic Valentine's Dayweekend. 4 00:00:09,943 --> 00:00:13,379 [ Both ] Mmm! Aah! 5 00:00:13,446 --> 00:00:15,209 - Areyou all packed? - Yep. 6 00:00:15,281 --> 00:00:18,444 - That's all you're bringing? - Well, I figured... 7 00:00:18,518 --> 00:00:20,452 I probablywouldn't be wearing much... 8 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:25,355 since it is our first romantic Valentine's Dayweekend! 9 00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:29,760 [ Both ] Mmm! Aah! 10 00:00:29,829 --> 00:00:31,797 Dharma, there's gonna be snow where we're going. 11 00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,799 I know! I finally get to see snow! 12 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:35,801 - Thankyou. - You're welcome. 13 00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:41,068 - But whatever's in there is not gonna keepyou warm. - No, but it'll keepyou warm. 14 00:00:41,141 --> 00:00:43,575 You're not taking this seriously. 15 00:00:43,643 --> 00:00:49,343 Sorry. Boy, I can't wait to go on vacation and have tons of sex. 16 00:00:50,817 --> 00:00:52,978 - Better? - Better. 17 00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,749 Your, uh, parents are watching the dogs, right? 18 00:00:55,822 --> 00:00:59,781 [ Whispering ] Yes. Shh! 19 00:00:59,859 --> 00:01:04,728 Stinky and Nunzio don't know that we're leaving yet. 20 00:01:04,798 --> 00:01:07,528 - Putyour suitcase in this bag. - Why? 21 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:10,000 Because ifthe dogs think we're taking out the garbage... 22 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,004 theywon't be upset that we're leaving. 23 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:17,100 You don't think that they'll put it together afterwe're gone for two days? 24 00:01:17,177 --> 00:01:19,475 Come on, Greg. They're just dogs. 25 00:01:24,451 --> 00:01:26,681 [Dharma Clearing Throat] 26 00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:29,916 Gee, Greg, thanks for helping me take out the trash. 27 00:01:29,989 --> 00:01:31,923 - It sure is a lot. - Yep. 28 00:01:31,991 --> 00:01:34,721 We'll just, uh, throw it all out and be right back. 29 00:01:34,794 --> 00:01:37,627 -Yep, be right back. -You guys want anything from the Dumpster? 30 00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:39,790 Yeah. 31 00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:44,570 - Be right back. All right. - Think they bought it? 32 00:01:44,637 --> 00:01:46,571 - [Dogs Howling, Whining] - Nope. 33 00:01:46,639 --> 00:01:49,870 - Now what? - Go back in, wait an hour, and we'll try again. 34 00:02:16,769 --> 00:02:19,738 Okay. Another 72 miles... 35 00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:22,468 averaging 50 miles an hour... 36 00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:26,000 allowing for one bathroom break, gets us to the B&B by 6:45. 37 00:02:26,079 --> 00:02:28,274 A little romance, and dinner at 7:00. 38 00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:33,281 - [ Sighs ] - [CarPassing] 39 00:02:33,353 --> 00:02:35,787 - Slug Bug! - Ow! 40 00:02:37,123 --> 00:02:39,648 - What did you do that for? - It's a game. 41 00:02:39,726 --> 00:02:42,058 Whenever a Volkswagen Beetle drives by... 42 00:02:42,128 --> 00:02:45,689 - whoever sees it first gets to punch the other guy. - Oh. 43 00:02:45,765 --> 00:02:47,699 Okay. 44 00:02:51,571 --> 00:02:54,039 - [ CarPassing] - Whack, whack, Cadillac! 45 00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:58,610 Okay, I get it. 46 00:03:00,513 --> 00:03:03,414 - [ CarPasses ] - Ford Probe. 47 00:03:03,483 --> 00:03:05,474 No wet willies! 48 00:03:05,552 --> 00:03:08,885 Do you think there's gonna be enough snow so we can have snowball fights? 49 00:03:08,955 --> 00:03:12,686 I spoke to the guy at the B&B. He said there's snow everywhere. 50 00:03:12,759 --> 00:03:17,924 [ Sinister Chuckle ] You are in big trouble, pretty boy. 51 00:03:17,997 --> 00:03:21,489 You know, you're pretty cocky for someone who's never even made a snowball. 52 00:03:21,568 --> 00:03:25,766 I had a matzo ball fight in a deli once. How different can it be? 53 00:03:25,838 --> 00:03:28,568 [ Gasps ] 54 00:03:28,641 --> 00:03:31,041 - Wha-What's wrong? - Quick, pull over. 55 00:03:31,110 --> 00:03:33,874 - What? What? - There's a dead animal by the side ofthe road. 56 00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:37,007 Oh. Thank God. I thought there was something wrong. 57 00:03:37,083 --> 00:03:41,577 Something is wrong, Greg. Something's verywrong. It's dead! 58 00:03:41,654 --> 00:03:45,522 - Back up. We have to bury it. - You're kidding, right? 59 00:03:57,036 --> 00:04:00,437 Dharma, you know they have guys who come along and scoop these things up. 60 00:04:00,506 --> 00:04:03,737 It's not a thing, Greg. 61 00:04:03,810 --> 00:04:08,747 It's a beaver or a raccoon or a really giant squirrel. 62 00:04:08,815 --> 00:04:11,579 I could tell better ifhe had a head. 63 00:04:11,651 --> 00:04:15,018 The point is, he's one of our fellow creatures, and he deserves a proper burial. 64 00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,716 Fine, but we're gonna be late. We're definitely gonna be late. 65 00:04:17,790 --> 00:04:23,194 - Late for our first romantic Valentine's Dayweekend. - Dharma, not here. 66 00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,254 [ Both ] Mmm! Aah! 67 00:04:25,331 --> 00:04:27,492 [ Gasps ] Greg, there's his head! 68 00:04:27,567 --> 00:04:29,501 - Dharma- - Greg, Greg, Greg- 69 00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:33,368 All right. You got him. Don't let him go. Finish him off. 70 00:04:33,439 --> 00:04:37,068 Larry, that's enough C-Span for one day. 71 00:04:37,143 --> 00:04:40,010 - Hey. - Come on. Help me sort this stuff out. 72 00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:42,138 - All right. - [Phone Ringing] 73 00:04:42,215 --> 00:04:43,705 - I got tags- - Whoop, whoop. 74 00:04:43,783 --> 00:04:45,717 - Yello. - Gregory, it's your father. 75 00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,616 - It's Larry. - It's Edward. 76 00:04:47,687 --> 00:04:49,746 There's no Edward here. Sorry. 77 00:04:51,858 --> 00:04:53,792 [Phone Beeping] 78 00:04:53,860 --> 00:04:58,320 - Okay. I got these tags- - [Phone Ringing] 79 00:04:58,398 --> 00:05:02,061 - Yello. - Finkelstein, it's Edward Montgomery. 80 00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:05,229 Oh, hey, Ed. What's up? 81 00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:09,435 - Is Gregory there? - Who is it? 82 00:05:09,509 --> 00:05:10,840 - Edward. - Edward? 83 00:05:10,910 --> 00:05:13,401 Yep. What's up, Ed? 84 00:05:15,014 --> 00:05:17,915 Is Gregory there? I need the address of a restaurant. 85 00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:21,215 - He's looking for Greg. - Greg's not here. 86 00:05:21,287 --> 00:05:24,154 He's not here, Ed. 87 00:05:26,492 --> 00:05:30,053 Wait. Ask them ifthey have anything theywanna donate to the animal shelter swap meet. 88 00:05:30,129 --> 00:05:34,498 Okay. Ed, doyou guys want to get in on a swap- that Abby's putting together? 89 00:05:34,567 --> 00:05:36,694 What? I can't hearyou. What? 90 00:05:36,769 --> 00:05:39,829 - [ Static ] You know, a swap- swapping- - What? What? 91 00:05:39,906 --> 00:05:41,874 - Hello? Hello? - Hello? Hello? 92 00:05:41,941 --> 00:05:44,068 - Hello! - Hello! 93 00:05:48,681 --> 00:05:50,876 - What was that all about? - Gregory's not there... 94 00:05:50,950 --> 00:05:55,546 and the Finkelstein's wanna know ifwe're interested in some sort ofswapping. 95 00:05:55,621 --> 00:06:00,285 - Swapping what? - I have no idea. 96 00:06:01,594 --> 00:06:04,722 Edward, you don't suppose they meant wives, doyou? 97 00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:10,129 - What areyou talking about? - Wife swapping. 98 00:06:11,904 --> 00:06:16,034 For sex. It's all part of their free-love philosophy. 99 00:06:16,109 --> 00:06:18,907 Oh, that's ridiculous. 100 00:06:18,978 --> 00:06:22,175 That is exactlywhy I want you to come to my book club... 101 00:06:22,248 --> 00:06:24,614 so thatyou're aware ofthese sorts ofthings. 102 00:06:26,919 --> 00:06:30,252 You're saying Larry Finkelstein wants to have sex with you? 103 00:06:30,323 --> 00:06:33,019 - Yes. - [ Laughing ] 104 00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:37,495 - What's so funny? - Oh, nothing. 105 00:06:37,563 --> 00:06:39,690 You're a beautiful woman and all men wantyou. 106 00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:46,663 Is that good enough, or should we stop at a jewelry store? 107 00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:48,673 You better stop. 108 00:06:53,212 --> 00:06:55,203 Oh, look, there's a historical marker. 109 00:06:55,281 --> 00:06:58,682 "On this site in 1 893"- 110 00:06:58,751 --> 00:07:01,015 somethin' happened. 111 00:07:02,989 --> 00:07:06,390 Must have been pretty good for them to put up that fancy statue. 112 00:07:11,297 --> 00:07:13,288 Ooh, a fruit stand. 113 00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:17,496 Hey, do you wanna stop and get some apple... cider? 114 00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:20,300 Honey, I'm just tryin' to make up some time so we can get to the B&B before sunset. 115 00:07:20,373 --> 00:07:22,773 - Why? - Because there's a breathtaking view... 116 00:07:22,842 --> 00:07:25,640 ofthe sunset from the statelyverandah. 117 00:07:25,711 --> 00:07:30,444 Honey, a sunset is breathtaking whereveryou are. 118 00:07:30,516 --> 00:07:34,179 Dharma, will you just, uh, please go with me on this? 119 00:07:34,253 --> 00:07:38,656 - [Siren Wailing] - Oh, great! 120 00:07:38,724 --> 00:07:42,091 Oh, yeah, soyou'll stop for him but not for me. 121 00:07:52,872 --> 00:07:57,366 Wow. That sunset sure takes your breath away, doesn't it? 122 00:07:57,443 --> 00:07:59,741 I tried to tell him that. 123 00:08:04,617 --> 00:08:07,211 Hello, Abby? It's Kitty Montgomery. 124 00:08:07,286 --> 00:08:09,948 - Oh, hi, Kitty. - [Kitty] Uh, listen. 125 00:08:10,022 --> 00:08:12,991 [ Chuckling ] You know, Larry and Edward spoke... 126 00:08:13,059 --> 00:08:15,425 and I think there's some sort of confusion. 127 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:20,330 You didn't invite us to participate in some sort of a, uh, swap, did you? 128 00:08:20,399 --> 00:08:24,460 Absolutely. It's always more fun with new people. 129 00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:31,568 -There are going to be other people there? -As many as we can get. 130 00:08:31,644 --> 00:08:33,578 Of course, I assure you, Kitty... 131 00:08:33,646 --> 00:08:37,878 once the gang gets a load ofyour goodies, you're gonna be very busy. 132 00:08:41,153 --> 00:08:43,087 Uh- 133 00:08:43,155 --> 00:08:46,318 Dear God. Um, Abby... 134 00:08:47,793 --> 00:08:51,854 we are not the sort of people who swap. 135 00:08:51,931 --> 00:08:56,459 Don't let the word confuse you. No, no, what you're really doing is selling your stuff. 136 00:08:57,803 --> 00:09:00,567 - Money is exchanged? - Uh-huh. 137 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:04,906 And everybody makes out. But, of course, no one more than the animals. 138 00:09:04,977 --> 00:09:06,911 They're the real reason we're doing this. 139 00:09:12,785 --> 00:09:16,380 - Hello? Hello? - [ Phone Clicking ] 140 00:09:22,461 --> 00:09:24,588 Ooh, it's kind of cute! 141 00:09:24,664 --> 00:09:27,827 No, this- this... can't be it. 142 00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:30,528 Look at the brochure. We're supposed to be surrounded... 143 00:09:30,603 --> 00:09:34,937 by snowcapped peaks, sitting on a statelyverandah, sipping hot cider. 144 00:09:35,007 --> 00:09:39,535 Well, we can run across to that 7-Eleven and get a couple ofSlurpees. 145 00:09:39,612 --> 00:09:42,046 - No. No, Dharma. Come on. Let's go. - [Doorbell Rings ] 146 00:09:42,114 --> 00:09:44,378 - We're not staying. - I just rang the doorbell. 147 00:09:44,450 --> 00:09:47,419 - I'm not gonna ding-dong ditch. - [Dogs Barking] 148 00:09:47,486 --> 00:09:51,047 [ Woman ] Regis, Kathie Lee, stopyelping. 149 00:09:51,123 --> 00:09:55,184 And, Regis, stop that. You're gonna lick herstitches out again. 150 00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:56,922 [ Door Opens ] 151 00:09:56,996 --> 00:10:02,628 Oh, are you here for the box turtles or the bed and breakfast? 152 00:10:02,702 --> 00:10:05,500 The bed and breakfast. We're the Montgomerys. 153 00:10:05,571 --> 00:10:07,903 - Oh, I'm delighted to see you. - Ohh! 154 00:10:07,974 --> 00:10:11,000 - I'm Alice. - We're delighted to seeyou too. 155 00:10:11,077 --> 00:10:13,477 You're a little late for the sunset toast... 156 00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:16,071 butyou can sit right here on the verandah... 157 00:10:16,148 --> 00:10:20,244 and watch the moon rise from behind the Texaco star. 158 00:10:23,689 --> 00:10:26,522 - That sounds romantic. - Uh, ho-hold on a second. 159 00:10:26,592 --> 00:10:28,685 I downloaded your brochure offthe Internet... 160 00:10:28,761 --> 00:10:33,460 and, uh, this is, um, nothing likeyourWeb site. 161 00:10:33,532 --> 00:10:36,797 Oh, my son made this. Oh. 162 00:10:36,869 --> 00:10:39,895 Well, I can see that he did gild the lily a bit. 163 00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,906 [ Laughs ] 164 00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:44,738 Oh, isn't this sweet? "Exquisite dining." 165 00:10:44,810 --> 00:10:47,404 Hejust loves his mama's cooking. 166 00:10:49,048 --> 00:10:52,449 Now, you come along with me, and I'll showyou toyour cottage. 167 00:10:52,518 --> 00:10:55,180 - Hey, how much are the box turtles? - That depends. 168 00:10:55,254 --> 00:10:57,848 Doyou want them for pets or for soup? 169 00:11:01,827 --> 00:11:03,886 This is bad. 170 00:11:03,963 --> 00:11:06,830 This is so bad. 171 00:11:10,636 --> 00:11:13,571 I just wanna make sure thatyour room is ready. 172 00:11:13,639 --> 00:11:16,437 Really bad. 173 00:11:20,746 --> 00:11:23,237 Come on, Greg. It's adorable. 174 00:11:23,315 --> 00:11:27,217 - It's like a big baked potato. - [Knocking] 175 00:11:27,286 --> 00:11:29,777 Kenny, the guests showed up after all. 176 00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:33,192 Get the pool raft and go sleep in the garage. 177 00:11:33,358 --> 00:11:35,292 [DoorOpens ] 178 00:11:38,096 --> 00:11:40,223 Welcome to the Red Rose Inn... 179 00:11:40,299 --> 00:11:43,166 where your pleasure is our business. 180 00:11:53,145 --> 00:11:55,079 Is this your first time at the Red Rose Inn? 181 00:11:55,147 --> 00:11:57,081 Does anybody come twice? 182 00:11:58,684 --> 00:12:00,618 Yes. This is our first trip. 183 00:12:00,686 --> 00:12:04,747 Okay, then you'll need instructions on the chemical toilet. 184 00:12:04,823 --> 00:12:07,587 You pump twice, then you doyour business... 185 00:12:07,659 --> 00:12:11,356 then you pump again to make sure that the coast is clear. 186 00:12:13,365 --> 00:12:17,734 - [ Mutters ] - Please enjoyyour complimentary bottle of pink champagne. 187 00:12:19,404 --> 00:12:21,599 Feel free to use the computer. 188 00:12:21,673 --> 00:12:23,868 The, uh, password is [ Whispers ] "Kenny." 189 00:12:23,942 --> 00:12:26,740 [ Whispers ] "Kenny." 190 00:12:26,812 --> 00:12:30,339 And, of course, uh, here's the bed. 191 00:12:30,415 --> 00:12:33,816 [ Laughing ] 192 00:12:33,885 --> 00:12:37,685 I'm sureyou know how to use that. 193 00:12:37,756 --> 00:12:40,748 Kenny, could you excuse us for a minute, please? 194 00:12:40,826 --> 00:12:43,420 Oh, wow. 195 00:12:43,495 --> 00:12:45,929 You don't have to tell me twice. 196 00:12:46,965 --> 00:12:50,662 Come on. Let's get outta here. 197 00:12:50,736 --> 00:12:53,330 Don't worry about the gratuity. 198 00:12:53,405 --> 00:12:56,135 I'm the proprietor. 199 00:12:56,208 --> 00:12:58,438 [DoorOpens, Closes ] 200 00:12:58,510 --> 00:13:01,604 We can't just walk out now. Look at all the trouble theywent to. 201 00:13:01,680 --> 00:13:05,480 I don't care. We're in a trailer in somebody's backyard! 202 00:13:05,550 --> 00:13:09,714 So what? We'll just pretend it's a cozy little cottage. 203 00:13:09,788 --> 00:13:13,724 But it's not a cozy cottage. It's Kenny's room. 204 00:13:17,195 --> 00:13:20,096 Come on, Greg. Just relax and go with it. 205 00:13:20,165 --> 00:13:22,998 No! It could be romantic... 206 00:13:23,068 --> 00:13:26,731 in a goofy kind ofway ifwe just give it a chance. 207 00:13:26,805 --> 00:13:29,467 Dharma, how can this be romantic? 208 00:13:30,742 --> 00:13:33,802 [ Clears Throat ] Like this. 209 00:13:37,849 --> 00:13:40,010 [Kenny] Mama, theydon't want dinner. 210 00:13:40,085 --> 00:13:42,076 They're doin' it! 211 00:13:48,427 --> 00:13:51,726 Edward, you didn't say anything to give them the impression... 212 00:13:51,797 --> 00:13:54,061 that we would engage in this sort of activity, did you? 213 00:13:54,132 --> 00:13:57,966 Yes, dear. I told them we were both hot to trot. 214 00:13:58,036 --> 00:13:59,970 [ Scoffs ] 215 00:14:00,038 --> 00:14:04,668 Every time I close my eyes, I see him unhitching that macramé belt. 216 00:14:05,877 --> 00:14:08,072 Why can't you put this out ofyour mind? 217 00:14:08,146 --> 00:14:12,810 Of all the people in the world, we are not going to swing with the Finkelsteins. 218 00:14:12,884 --> 00:14:17,378 Areyou implying there are some people we would swing with? 219 00:14:17,456 --> 00:14:19,981 - Oh, no, no, no. Of course not. Don't be silly. - Well- 220 00:14:20,058 --> 00:14:22,891 - Thankyou. - You're welcome. 221 00:14:22,961 --> 00:14:25,156 [ Sighs ] Oh, Lord. 222 00:14:25,230 --> 00:14:28,290 Of course, the Beitermeyers are a fairly handsome couple. 223 00:14:29,368 --> 00:14:31,302 Are you serious? 224 00:14:31,370 --> 00:14:34,635 John Beitermeyer is entirely devoid of chin. 225 00:14:35,974 --> 00:14:38,306 Now- Now, David and Anna Collins- 226 00:14:38,377 --> 00:14:40,937 Anna Collins? That woman's a Clydesdale. 227 00:14:43,415 --> 00:14:47,784 Of course, the Hippelwhites- Now, that's a couple. 228 00:14:47,853 --> 00:14:50,754 True. They're very fit. 229 00:14:50,822 --> 00:14:53,518 - Tan too. - Mm-hmm. 230 00:15:03,168 --> 00:15:07,229 So, this is your first Valentine's Day as a couple. 231 00:15:07,305 --> 00:15:11,105 - I had a girlfriend once. - Kenny, we're not talking about you now, are we? 232 00:15:13,712 --> 00:15:17,079 No, actually, Mrs. Binns, I would like to talk toyour son for a minute. 233 00:15:17,149 --> 00:15:21,313 - Kenny, um, did you make this brochure? - Yes, sir. 234 00:15:21,386 --> 00:15:24,355 Thepicture on the brochure ofithe Victorian house with the gables and the verandahs- 235 00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:27,790 - Where did you get that? - Magazine. 236 00:15:27,859 --> 00:15:30,623 You can't just do that. 237 00:15:30,695 --> 00:15:33,220 Can with a photo scanner. 238 00:15:33,298 --> 00:15:36,131 No. We came here specifically to be... 239 00:15:36,201 --> 00:15:39,500 in a beautiful place with snow, because mywife has never seen snow. 240 00:15:39,571 --> 00:15:43,871 You've misrepresented everything. This brochure is all lies! 241 00:15:43,942 --> 00:15:47,275 Kenny, bite that quivering lip. You've got this coming, you know. 242 00:15:49,414 --> 00:15:52,178 - Don'tyell at him. - He deserves to beyelled at. 243 00:15:52,250 --> 00:15:55,014 He's got to know that he did something wrong. If not for us... 244 00:15:55,086 --> 00:15:58,112 then for the next people who pay $200 a night to stay in this dump. 245 00:15:58,190 --> 00:16:01,717 It's not a dump. It's my room! 246 00:16:07,499 --> 00:16:10,991 I guess I don't need to tell you he was a colicky baby. 247 00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:18,300 Oh, and to make it up toyou... 248 00:16:18,376 --> 00:16:22,210 I'll giveyou an extra night forjust halfthe price. 249 00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:26,148 - Thankyou. - [DoorCloses ] 250 00:16:26,218 --> 00:16:28,550 You go out there right now and you apologize. 251 00:16:28,620 --> 00:16:30,781 - Apologize? - Yes, Greg. Theywere trying to be... 252 00:16:30,856 --> 00:16:33,484 hospitable to us, and you completely insulted them. 253 00:16:33,558 --> 00:16:35,822 Dharma, what about us? Look around. Lookwhat happened... 254 00:16:35,894 --> 00:16:38,488 to ourvery first romantic Valentine's Dayweekend. 255 00:16:38,563 --> 00:16:41,054 - Don'tyou dare twirl in my arms. - I wasn't planning on it. 256 00:16:41,132 --> 00:16:43,123 You wanna know what happened to our romantic weekend? 257 00:16:43,201 --> 00:16:45,692 - I'll tell you. You ruined it. - I ruined it? 258 00:16:45,770 --> 00:16:48,364 Yes, Greg, you, with your schedule and your brochure... 259 00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:51,102 and all ofyour expectations about how everything's supposed to go... 260 00:16:51,176 --> 00:16:53,542 according to some master plan. 261 00:16:53,612 --> 00:16:56,046 I did that soyou would have a good time. 262 00:16:56,114 --> 00:16:58,309 Greg, I've got news foryou. 263 00:16:58,383 --> 00:17:00,613 I've been having a good time. 264 00:17:00,685 --> 00:17:03,654 And I was hoping that before the end ofthe weekend, you'd join me. 265 00:17:03,722 --> 00:17:06,555 - [Rumbling] - Oh, my God. 266 00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:11,688 - What's that, an earthquake? - No, we're moving. 267 00:17:13,565 --> 00:17:16,966 I don't believe it. He's kidnapping us! You still think they're nice folks? 268 00:17:17,035 --> 00:17:18,969 All right. I admit he's overreacting a little... 269 00:17:19,037 --> 00:17:20,971 butwhat he's overreacting to is you yelling at him. 270 00:17:21,039 --> 00:17:24,770 - Kenny, stop this thing right now! - Thereyou go again! 271 00:17:24,843 --> 00:17:26,970 You're supposed toyell when you're being kidnapped! 272 00:17:27,045 --> 00:17:29,707 That's why they usually put duct tape on your mouth! 273 00:17:31,283 --> 00:17:33,774 - Where areyou going? - I'm gonna go out that door... 274 00:17:33,852 --> 00:17:36,218 crawl along the roof ofthe trailer, jump into the pickup truck... 275 00:17:36,288 --> 00:17:38,222 and very quietly, withoutyelling... 276 00:17:38,290 --> 00:17:40,724 beat little Kenny to a pulp. 277 00:17:40,792 --> 00:17:42,726 [Horn Honking] 278 00:17:44,529 --> 00:17:46,520 I'll wait till he stops for gas. 279 00:17:54,339 --> 00:17:56,330 [ Groans ] 280 00:17:57,909 --> 00:18:00,469 - Hey, Dharma, wake up. - Mmm. 281 00:18:00,545 --> 00:18:02,479 - What? - We're not moving. 282 00:18:08,086 --> 00:18:10,020 I don't believe it. 283 00:18:11,690 --> 00:18:15,421 [ Gasps ] It's snow! 284 00:18:15,493 --> 00:18:18,326 [ Gasps, Screams ] 285 00:18:20,365 --> 00:18:24,165 "Sorry, I lied. Hope this makes it better. Kenny. 286 00:18:24,235 --> 00:18:28,865 PS: Make sure the trailer is level before using the chemical toilet." 287 00:18:30,742 --> 00:18:32,676 - Hey, Greg. - What? 288 00:18:32,744 --> 00:18:34,974 Duck! 289 00:18:36,681 --> 00:18:39,878 Okay. [Laughing] Hey, Dharma? 290 00:18:39,951 --> 00:18:43,182 - What? - Guess what this is? 291 00:18:43,254 --> 00:18:48,282 [ Squeals ] It's our first romantic Valentine's Dayweekend. 292 00:18:48,360 --> 00:18:50,851 [ Screams, Spits ] 293 00:18:50,929 --> 00:18:53,056 - Sucker! - That's it! 294 00:18:56,935 --> 00:18:59,563 [ Screams ] I loveyou. 295 00:19:01,940 --> 00:19:04,500 [ Screaming ] 296 00:19:10,315 --> 00:19:12,442 [ Woman On TV] Can't look at- 297 00:19:13,852 --> 00:19:15,786 All right. Listen here. 298 00:19:15,854 --> 00:19:18,118 Our children are married, and there is the possibility... 299 00:19:18,189 --> 00:19:20,123 thatwewill know each other forthe rest of our lives. 300 00:19:20,191 --> 00:19:23,422 So, I'm going tosaythis- I'm onlygoing to sayit once. 301 00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:25,986 Under no circumstances are Edward and I... 302 00:19:26,064 --> 00:19:28,532 ever going to have sex with the two ofyou. 303 00:19:32,103 --> 00:19:34,663 Do you understand? 304 00:19:34,739 --> 00:19:37,333 - Yes. - Yeah, I think so. 305 00:19:39,244 --> 00:19:41,508 Edward. 306 00:19:43,715 --> 00:19:46,013 But thankyou for thinking of us. 307 00:19:47,018 --> 00:19:49,009 [ No Audible Dialogue ] 308 00:20:17,515 --> 00:20:19,449 It's 4 to 6 Foot! 25214

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.