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1
00:00:08,965 --> 00:00:10,724
What's the matter?
2
00:00:10,724 --> 00:00:13,551
- Hmm?
- What? You seem depressed.
3
00:00:13,551 --> 00:00:14,689
You okay?
4
00:00:14,689 --> 00:00:16,620
- Yeah, I just-
- Did someone break up
5
00:00:16,620 --> 00:00:18,724
with you over text again?
6
00:00:19,724 --> 00:00:21,034
No, Madison.
7
00:00:22,931 --> 00:00:24,724
That happened earlier.
8
00:00:24,724 --> 00:00:27,275
No, I just have writer's block.
9
00:00:27,275 --> 00:00:28,172
What?
10
00:00:29,241 --> 00:00:32,965
Well, I already said
that his cum is dripping
11
00:00:32,965 --> 00:00:34,241
down the side of my leg,
12
00:00:34,241 --> 00:00:36,137
so I really don't know
where to go from there.
13
00:00:36,137 --> 00:00:38,655
I always find it hard
to continue the fantasy
14
00:00:38,655 --> 00:00:41,137
after one of us cums.
15
00:00:41,137 --> 00:00:44,000
Typically I'll just like
restart the fantasy.
16
00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:45,965
But this one's really hot
and it's been going on
17
00:00:45,965 --> 00:00:47,689
for a while, so I'd rather, oh,
I got it.
18
00:00:47,689 --> 00:00:48,620
Hmm.
19
00:00:50,827 --> 00:00:55,206
You run the head of your cock
up the trail of your seed
20
00:00:56,379 --> 00:01:00,413
collecting it and guiding
it all back into my
21
00:01:02,172 --> 00:01:05,931
pulsing hole telling me,
I am not allowed
22
00:01:05,931 --> 00:01:08,068
to waste a single drop.
23
00:01:15,103 --> 00:01:17,103
I, I need you to leave.
24
00:01:18,068 --> 00:01:19,896
Like most gay men, my
phone is less
25
00:01:19,896 --> 00:01:21,241
of a communication device
26
00:01:21,241 --> 00:01:25,379
and more of an electronic
gallery of male genitalia.
27
00:01:25,379 --> 00:01:29,206
Mine in particular is also
a tome of erotic fiction
28
00:01:29,206 --> 00:01:31,620
that could make Caligula blush.
29
00:01:31,620 --> 00:01:34,793
Unfortunately, that also
means it's a fucking minefield!
30
00:01:34,793 --> 00:01:36,068
For instance,
31
00:01:36,965 --> 00:01:39,068
which one of these is
my actual father
32
00:01:39,068 --> 00:01:40,965
and which one is an
uncut Brazilian
33
00:01:40,965 --> 00:01:43,586
who demands service
from his good boy?
34
00:01:43,586 --> 00:01:44,482
Who can say?
35
00:01:44,482 --> 00:01:46,448
That means I get to live
in constant fear
36
00:01:46,448 --> 00:01:48,793
of accidentally texting
my actual father
37
00:01:48,793 --> 00:01:50,827
to come over and penetrate me.
38
00:01:50,827 --> 00:01:54,034
I mean, sure I, I could add
some devil emojis to some
39
00:01:54,034 --> 00:01:56,827
of these, but you know,
what can I say?
40
00:01:56,827 --> 00:01:58,551
I like to live dangerously.
41
00:01:58,551 --> 00:02:00,310
But in that regard, I think
I finally met my match.
42
00:02:00,310 --> 00:02:02,758
His name is Greg and he's
a goddamn poet.
43
00:02:02,758 --> 00:02:03,724
Check this.
44
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:08,655
As the head of my impossibly
thick member presses against
45
00:02:08,655 --> 00:02:10,275
your throbbing hole,
46
00:02:10,275 --> 00:02:12,068
you'll beg for its entry,
47
00:02:12,068 --> 00:02:14,655
only to silence yourself
with a gasp triggered
48
00:02:14,655 --> 00:02:17,275
by the audacity of
the penetration.
49
00:02:17,275 --> 00:02:20,000
That's some fucking Maya
Angelou shit right there.
50
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,034
That's the kinda shit I
need from my guy.
51
00:02:22,034 --> 00:02:23,586
I'm an elder millennial,
which means
52
00:02:23,586 --> 00:02:26,586
that I didn't grow up in
a world of safe spaces,
53
00:02:26,586 --> 00:02:29,344
anti-bullying, valuing
other people's experiences,
54
00:02:29,344 --> 00:02:32,103
just generally caring about
other people's feelings.
55
00:02:32,103 --> 00:02:34,862
So that means I need a
steady stream
56
00:02:34,862 --> 00:02:36,034
of sexual attention in order
57
00:02:36,034 --> 00:02:38,413
to feel any amount of
self-esteem.
58
00:02:38,413 --> 00:02:41,379
If you would like to date me,
you need
59
00:02:41,379 --> 00:02:44,206
to bring a fire hose of
erotic energy so
60
00:02:44,206 --> 00:02:46,379
that I can feel that
I have value.
61
00:02:46,379 --> 00:02:48,103
Hey Siri, text Greg.
62
00:02:48,103 --> 00:02:50,034
What do you
want to say?
63
00:02:50,034 --> 00:02:54,689
That gasp is accompanied by
a spasm that grips your cock,
64
00:02:54,689 --> 00:02:57,448
undeterred you continue
your momentum forward,
65
00:02:57,448 --> 00:02:59,103
as I learn to accept you,
66
00:02:59,103 --> 00:03:01,310
I have no other choice.
67
00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,275
Mind your fucking business!
68
00:03:05,275 --> 00:03:07,275
This little naughty
game of pen pals
69
00:03:07,275 --> 00:03:09,275
started at like the 10th
message exchange,
70
00:03:09,275 --> 00:03:11,310
which is nuts, but also amazing.
71
00:03:11,310 --> 00:03:14,172
And while we did meet
on a dating app,
72
00:03:14,172 --> 00:03:16,758
the texting has just been so hot
73
00:03:16,758 --> 00:03:19,482
and so frequent that we've
realized we just need
74
00:03:19,482 --> 00:03:22,068
to fuck first and that
is happening tonight.
75
00:03:22,068 --> 00:03:26,482
Now while I have been belt
tucking 24/7 in anticipation
76
00:03:26,482 --> 00:03:29,344
of this, part of me is
worried that the final release
77
00:03:29,344 --> 00:03:32,655
of our mounting sexual
tension will lay waste
78
00:03:32,655 --> 00:03:34,379
to half of Brooklyn.
79
00:03:36,068 --> 00:03:38,172
Hey Siri, text Greg.
80
00:03:38,172 --> 00:03:40,206
What do you
want to say?
81
00:03:40,206 --> 00:03:42,448
As you reach the
deepest parts of me,
82
00:03:42,448 --> 00:03:44,448
I will suddenly
rediscover speech.
83
00:03:44,448 --> 00:03:46,655
"Please," I'll whimper.
84
00:03:46,655 --> 00:03:49,965
At first, you think I need
more time to open for you,
85
00:03:49,965 --> 00:03:51,482
but you'll look into my eyes
86
00:03:51,482 --> 00:03:55,724
and realize what I'm
asking for is to be filled.
87
00:03:57,172 --> 00:03:58,758
Thank you, Kyle!
88
00:04:01,827 --> 00:04:04,862
It is rare for me to find a
man that can go toe to toe
89
00:04:04,862 --> 00:04:06,103
with me on this,
90
00:04:06,103 --> 00:04:09,206
but this guy is, wait for it...
91
00:04:09,206 --> 00:04:11,793
An erotic workshop coach.
92
00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:13,827
Yeah, like tantric shit.
93
00:04:13,827 --> 00:04:16,793
And you know the stuff whores
like me would do if we wanted
94
00:04:16,793 --> 00:04:18,586
to make money from sex
but weren't quite ready
95
00:04:18,586 --> 00:04:22,655
to cross the Rubicon
into escort or porn star?
96
00:04:27,275 --> 00:04:31,827
"Please" not "cheese."
97
00:04:31,827 --> 00:04:33,517
Siri is homophobic.
98
00:04:38,827 --> 00:04:41,034
And honestly, if you
think about it,
99
00:04:41,034 --> 00:04:43,724
isn't an erotic workshop coach
like the perfect guy for me?
100
00:04:43,724 --> 00:04:45,448
I mean, if I could go
back in time
101
00:04:45,448 --> 00:04:48,586
and do it all over again,
I'd probab-
102
00:04:48,586 --> 00:04:51,689
You know, if I've learned
anything from the last 20 years
103
00:04:51,689 --> 00:04:54,413
of being a gay man, it's that,
you know,
104
00:04:54,413 --> 00:04:56,310
cultivating an intellect,
developing a vibrant
105
00:04:56,310 --> 00:04:57,827
personality,
106
00:04:57,827 --> 00:05:02,655
pursuing a legal career,
fostering a creative outlet,
107
00:05:02,655 --> 00:05:04,379
you know, those were all just
108
00:05:04,379 --> 00:05:06,586
a complete fucking
waste of time!
109
00:05:06,586 --> 00:05:08,000
What I should have
done, is gone to the gym
110
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:09,862
a little bit more and
then become a sex worker.
111
00:05:09,862 --> 00:05:11,931
And that way gay people would
give a shit about whether
112
00:05:11,931 --> 00:05:13,758
I were dead or alive.
113
00:05:14,862 --> 00:05:18,379
Roads not taken.
114
00:05:25,862 --> 00:05:29,655
Namaste.
Welcome to my temple, Daniel.
115
00:05:29,655 --> 00:05:32,655
Would you care for
an herbal tea?
116
00:05:33,724 --> 00:05:36,137
There's something so
unsettling about
117
00:05:36,137 --> 00:05:38,000
a man that drinks tea.
118
00:05:45,724 --> 00:05:47,068
So are we doing like a
meditation role play
119
00:05:47,068 --> 00:05:48,310
or something?
120
00:05:48,310 --> 00:05:51,275
I just wanna make sure
we're on the same page.
121
00:05:51,275 --> 00:05:52,344
Roles...
122
00:05:54,275 --> 00:05:57,517
We play all sorts of roles,
don't we?
123
00:05:58,241 --> 00:06:00,068
Those that we choose,
124
00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:04,551
those that are put upon us
by the rest of the world.
125
00:06:04,551 --> 00:06:09,551
Every moment of every waking
hour is a role play, Daniel.
126
00:06:11,551 --> 00:06:13,034
So why should now
127
00:06:16,482 --> 00:06:18,000
be any different?
128
00:06:19,862 --> 00:06:20,931
I'm starting to get real
worried about what's
129
00:06:20,931 --> 00:06:22,241
in this tea.
130
00:06:22,241 --> 00:06:25,862
Shall we discuss consent
before we begin, Daniel?
131
00:06:25,862 --> 00:06:27,137
Oh, yeah, sure.
132
00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:29,482
So don't hit me. Don't choke me.
133
00:06:29,482 --> 00:06:31,793
No fish hooks.
Don't call me a whore.
134
00:06:31,793 --> 00:06:34,620
No extracurricular fluids and-
135
00:06:35,827 --> 00:06:40,517
You're speaking of
boundaries, Daniel, not consent.
136
00:06:41,551 --> 00:06:44,206
In my line of work, it is vital
137
00:06:44,206 --> 00:06:48,827
that all sexual experiences
be entirely consensual.
138
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:52,068
Sure.
139
00:06:52,068 --> 00:06:55,413
Well you will be happy to
know that all of the sex
140
00:06:55,413 --> 00:06:58,413
I have had to date has
been consensual.
141
00:06:58,413 --> 00:06:59,862
Are you sure, Daniel?
142
00:06:59,862 --> 00:07:03,758
Pretty sure I've never
raped anybody.
143
00:07:03,758 --> 00:07:07,206
You have so much to learn,
Daniel.
144
00:07:07,206 --> 00:07:08,931
But most people do.
145
00:07:11,689 --> 00:07:15,206
In my line of work, each look,
each touch,
146
00:07:16,413 --> 00:07:19,000
each act must be consented to.
147
00:07:20,551 --> 00:07:21,724
Interesting.
148
00:07:21,724 --> 00:07:24,344
So how about I just
give you blanket consent
149
00:07:24,344 --> 00:07:26,172
that I can revoke in
my discretion
150
00:07:26,172 --> 00:07:29,241
and we do it just like
everyone else does it?
151
00:07:29,241 --> 00:07:31,241
I'm not everybody else,
Daniel.
152
00:07:31,241 --> 00:07:32,517
Sure isn't.
153
00:07:33,827 --> 00:07:36,965
Danny, may I truly
meet your gaze?
154
00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:39,896
Sure.
155
00:07:53,344 --> 00:07:55,275
Thank you for your consent.
156
00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:56,172
Now,
157
00:07:57,206 --> 00:07:58,896
may I disrobe?
158
00:07:58,896 --> 00:07:59,793
Why not?
159
00:08:08,827 --> 00:08:10,586
Alright, pro, it's a nice one
160
00:08:10,586 --> 00:08:12,172
and it lives up to the pictures.
161
00:08:12,172 --> 00:08:13,551
Con,
162
00:08:13,551 --> 00:08:17,000
it's very possible he's a
serial killer.
163
00:08:18,379 --> 00:08:21,724
Guess there's only one
way to find out.
164
00:08:23,551 --> 00:08:23,896
You see,
165
00:08:25,344 --> 00:08:28,896
you have already engaged in
three non-consensual acts.
166
00:08:28,896 --> 00:08:30,275
What?
167
00:08:30,275 --> 00:08:34,793
One, you do not ask if you
had my consent to disrobe.
168
00:08:34,793 --> 00:08:39,551
Two, you do not ask if
you had my consent to rise
169
00:08:39,551 --> 00:08:43,275
to your knees or turn
your gaze to my penis.
170
00:08:44,413 --> 00:08:47,000
Now you see, don't you?
171
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:48,482
Fear not,
172
00:08:48,482 --> 00:08:50,344
I forgive you for violating me
173
00:08:50,344 --> 00:08:52,137
and I'd be happy to continue
174
00:08:52,137 --> 00:08:56,206
now that you understand
the true complexities
175
00:08:56,206 --> 00:08:57,862
of sexual consent.
176
00:08:57,862 --> 00:09:02,448
If you'd like, I give
you consent to take me
177
00:09:02,448 --> 00:09:04,000
into your throat.
178
00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:11,275
This guy's so fucking creepy!
179
00:09:11,275 --> 00:09:13,344
But I'm also incredibly hard.
180
00:09:13,344 --> 00:09:15,310
Oh I'm broken.
181
00:09:18,931 --> 00:09:21,379
Alright, so we're
never gonna date
182
00:09:21,379 --> 00:09:22,965
because I don't wanna ever have
183
00:09:22,965 --> 00:09:24,206
to introduce this
lunatic to anyone,
184
00:09:24,206 --> 00:09:26,517
let alone have to live
in the woods or whatever.
185
00:09:26,517 --> 00:09:28,586
But if I'm being honest,
186
00:09:28,586 --> 00:09:30,862
every inch of my body
is tingling.
187
00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:33,551
I mean, I've practically
been edged the whole night,
188
00:09:33,551 --> 00:09:35,241
albeit in the most
cringe way possible.
189
00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:38,793
I don't know, maybe we'll be
like fuck buddies or something.
190
00:09:38,793 --> 00:09:40,896
There might be something
to this after all.
191
00:09:40,896 --> 00:09:43,724
Danny, we're almost finished.
192
00:09:43,724 --> 00:09:45,931
I suggest you find your
inner most sanctum!
193
00:09:45,931 --> 00:09:47,862
You're in my inner
most sanctum!
194
00:09:47,862 --> 00:09:48,758
Oh, ah,
195
00:10:01,586 --> 00:10:03,896
I must rest, Daniel,
196
00:10:03,896 --> 00:10:08,034
I give you consent to
finish in my absence.
197
00:10:33,482 --> 00:10:35,689
- Reply.
- What do you want to say?
198
00:10:35,689 --> 00:10:39,103
Would you like to
see a hole pic?
199
00:10:39,103 --> 00:10:42,103
It says, "Would
you like to see Epic?"
200
00:10:42,103 --> 00:10:42,965
Send it?
201
00:10:42,965 --> 00:10:43,793
No.
202
00:10:43,793 --> 00:10:45,034
What do you
want to say?
203
00:10:45,034 --> 00:10:48,172
Would-you-like-to
see-a-hole-pic?
204
00:10:50,344 --> 00:10:53,068
It says, "Would
you like to see the Hobbit?"
205
00:10:53,068 --> 00:10:53,827
Send it?
206
00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:54,655
No!
207
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:57,068
What do you
want to say?
208
00:10:57,068 --> 00:10:57,965
Would
209
00:10:57,965 --> 00:10:58,827
you
210
00:10:58,827 --> 00:10:59,482
like
211
00:10:59,482 --> 00:11:00,413
to
212
00:11:00,413 --> 00:11:01,275
see
213
00:11:01,275 --> 00:11:02,172
a
214
00:11:02,172 --> 00:11:02,413
hole
215
00:11:02,413 --> 00:11:03,689
pic?
216
00:11:03,689 --> 00:11:05,344
It says, "When
can I meet your parents?"
217
00:11:05,344 --> 00:11:07,068
Send it?
- I'm going to bed.
15597
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