All language subtitles for 1,Have His Carcase (Christopher Hodson) - Episode One.en

[Music]

I am instructed to say my Lord that in

withdrawing the charge against the

prisoner the crown proceeds from a

complete conviction of her innocence and

offers no evidence against her I am very

glad to hear

it prisoner at the

bar the crown by unreservedly

withdrawing this Dreadful charge against

you have demonstrated your innocence in

the clearest possible way and I most

hearly congratulate you on on this very

satisfactory ending to your long

ordeal than you

[Music]

am I

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

n

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[Applause]

you have been wonderful the way you the

way you've supported me and acted on my

behalf it was

nothing you are the woman I want to

spend the rest of my life with how else

could I

behave I've had a lover Peter I've been

accused of murdering him I'm not going

to rush into another

affair marriage marriage of what's the

difference it's supposed to be love

isn't

it I'm sry

[Music]

[Music]

a

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[Applause]

[Music]

I say watch the

tide you get cut off

soon it's peculiar

I

say I

say I say

[Music]

oh God

oh no

help

help help

only one set of

footprints his

and mine

[Music]

oh

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[Music]

[Music]

he

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footprint perfect

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[Music]

[Music]

m

on I

[Music]

say hello come

on I

say excuse

me I say could you tell me is there a

telephone up at that farm

telephone I never heard of one well is

there anyone there who might be able to

help me I mean it's the farmer there

there ain't no one there it is Market

day I see well do know where the nearest

telephone is oh they might have one at

Red Farm where's that you go up the road

and turn left yes but how far is that

it's about 3 or 4 Mile three or four

miles but you do know there's a

telephone

there Mr coffin he has a

wireless I see well I'll try that thank

you

no we ain't got no telephone Mr coffin

don't know oh I see they do have one at

the Big House ah where's that just keep

going up the lane and you'll come to the

park Gates but they keep them locked so

keep on round by the eyewall and you'll

come to the large oh mine I'm not sure

there's anyone there now might be up in

London they got this there quite a lot

sometimes for a few days Miss coffin is

there anywhere else near here where I

can get a

telephone oh darling I know they got one

there now just go back to the coast Road

and it's on the way to

wome thank you

[Music]

excuse me could you tell me anywhere

where I could find a

telephone or a

car there's a man on the beach with his

throat cut I say is he a friend of yours

no I don't know for Madam but I've got

to get to the police before the body

gets washed away yeah the tie could be

going out it could be but it isn't it's

coming in afraid I'm rather short

sighted yes well thank you anyway do you

think he was murdered

I suppose he might have been I better

come along with you expect you'd feel

better if I was along yes thank

you but to hurry though

[Music]

[Music]

hello what's your

name Rosie Rosie poock well Rosie do you

know anybody near here who's got a

telephone here Rosie you'll come inside

this minute excuse me

Mrs

Pollock hey you didn't stop them they

could have given us a lift what were you

doing I've got a blister on my heel oh I

am sorry to hear that because now it

looks as though we're going to have to

walk all the way to Dary

[Music]

ah a camper yeah but I shouldn't

know excuse

me are we anywhere near darly yes 10

minutes down the road first right and

it's half a mile in land oh thank

goodness is there anything the

matter well I've just found a dead body

on the beach good Lord so I wanted to

notify the police naturally where's a

telephone in darly you can phone the

police station in wilcom from there

right thanks sorry I can't help damn

thing's broken down that's all right

thank

you there's no need to stop and talk to

everyone we

meet that fellow was very rude to me

this morning when I came through here if

you ask me there's something funny about

him I'm sure he's wearing a

wig so what if he is Poor Man's probably

Bal unless you think that makes him a

murderer come on we must get to Darling

[Music]

[Music]

there

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oh come

on having our tea most

likly number please the police station

wilcom wilam police station hold the

line

please well the complete station oh I

wish to report a body of a man my name

is vain Miss Harriet Vain and I'm

speaking from the grossers at Dary

George H shop where was this Miss well

it was it was on a rock sort of shaped

like a shoe tree about 5 miles down the

coast is there two big rocks out to see

yes yes there are H the Grinders they

are Miss I know the place flat iron Rock

we call that now um what time did you

see the body miss it was about 2:00 but

it'll have been washed away by now I've

been trying to get to a telephone well

if you could hang on there miss someone

will be along directly yes very

[Applause]

well do you think I can make another

phone

call to

London that'll be an expensive car M I'm

sure 10 Shillings will cover

it very good M help yourself man thank

you

look I'd love to do your job but I've

got my own problems all right yeah so

just stop whining and get on with

it about time quick one Del lay the DK

we're can pan in uh 10 minutes okay C

the words out of my

mouth Morning Star News editor crime

reporter please hang on

Sally who wants

him could you speak up please

har I'm calling from darling near wil

yeah hang on haret B wasn't she on that

murder charge Lord Peter whimsy's friend

I'll take

it Sal Hardy here Miss V good afternoon

Mr hardy good

afternoon I see you've been reporting

the Clarence hat case oh it's early

stages yet but just wait there'll be

some disclosures there all right but

what about you missb the whole of Fleet

Street is wondering what became of you

I'm on a walking tour of the West

country ah get away from it all eh

partly well what can we do for you m

I've got an exclusive for you what's the

catch oh come now Mr hardy you're too

cynical it's a cynical business what's

the catch have you got a pen handy yes

thank

you whil working on the plot of her

latest

novel it's called the fountain pen

mystery so that's the catch call it a

quidd

proquo Miss Harriet vain came across the

body of a man

[Music]

[Applause]

you

[Music]

[Music]

good afternoon good afternoon Miss hurri

up vain that's right inspector

toan good afternoon inspector

oh you reported seeing the body of a man

that's right though I doubted he' be

there any longer quite

so what did you say your name was

again miss Harriet

V is that's right I've been tried died

for murder oh and acquitted Miss I think

Lord Peter Whimsy had something to do

with that yes

something I owe Lord Peter a great

[Music]

deal it's far too long look they found

you the photograph so cut it in half or

the sub will mutilate

itk armor vein seems to have stumbled in

a hot one i' better let Lord Peto but

not just yet let's get the story in

first uh this hiker you didn't see where

he went to no I went into telephone when

I came out he'd gone can you describe

him Miss Finn in his

30s torto shell spectacles mcy hair Cary

shorts hav saac are you observant best

now do you mind telling me where you're

heading for well I'd hope to spend the

night in will come in ector yes well we

may have to ask you to spend two or 3

days in the area well yes well if it's

murder I want to be in on it

murderous or

suicide yes right well we'll give you a

LIF into overcome and we can talk about

it in the car right I'll bring a bag

Percy ni sir I don't suppose you could

recommend anywhere inspector um Clay's

Temperance hotel is generally reckon to

be quite comfortable well I dare say it

is but I what about the resplendant

inspector

resplendant like pushing the boat out of

bed isn't it sounds just what I feel

like take me to the resplendant hotel

[Music]

thank you so much good

evening I'm afraid that all our rooms

are

engaged surely not this late in the

season very well I'll have a drink in

the lounge perhaps you'd ask the manager

to have a word with me my name is vain

Miss vain would you join me inspector oh

very kind

yet marriet vain the famous mystery

writer friend of Lord Peter whimsy's

oh miss

ve I had quite forgotten that an

American gentleman vacated his room

sooner than he expected number 223 on

the second floor with a nice view of the

esplanad does it have a private bathroom

oh yes Madam Miss fi and a balcony I

think you'll find it quite satisfactory

thank you have you got a paper bag a

paper bag Miss F yes a large

[Music]

one will this do

[Music]

perfect items from the Cor

oh and I forgot my camera I took some

pictures of the corpse I'd quite like to

know how they come out Room 223 did you

say maybe you'd ask the porter to bring

my luggage up I'll be along tomorrow

inspector if that's all right well yes

Miss good night good night good night

con good

night well bring the bag Percy all

right the hotel resplendant wilam

when did you hear this a couple of

minutes ago she just called and

inspector tralan is in charge of the

case she doesn't know you're telling me

this I said does a newspaper man tell

one hand what the other one's doing only

when he thinks it'll make a better story

but thank you Sally and get yourself

here tomorrow morning at

dawn your white lady my

Lord my white

lady Norman do you think

Mone pack a bag

bu wome

meone what else

[Music]

w

[Music]

[Applause]

waiter isn't Mr Alexis here tonight I

believe not

Madam why not is he ill uh I don't think

so Madam but I'm sure Madam M anine

would be happy

too no thank you it really doesn't

matter

[Music]

[Music]

Madame this is your favorite tune missp

all do me the

[Music]

honor now then Mr blankin aren't you

going to ask me to dance today

I should have to give you one of my

skulls oh yes please Mr blankin so come

on I thought we were going to practice

that New Jersey

may I come into your

parlor

Peter what on Earth brings you here

famous author finds body on beach so

here I am like a bird that he has the

call of its mate I didn't call I meant

the body oh but talking it mates will

you Mar at me certainly

not how did you get here so quickly

Sally who is even now waiting for the

bar to open telephone me last night told

me my Miss vain had found a corpse and

did I know about it I don't know how he

knew I told him with all the gy details

certainly good publicity for my new

book does this not pardon me indicate a

certain cing of the fibers

absolutely at this moment my fibers

resemble coconut matting with not even

welcome written across

them I'm come off to the

police look here beloved bearing in mind

the fact that I too am a medler in

Mysteries couldn't you as man a man let

me in on the ground floor

besides I could offer you a lift oh well

if you put it like that yes I

suppose oh good morning m f inspector

TR this is Lord Peter Whimsy whose

interest in crime you may know of oh

well I never very glad to make your

acquaintance my

Lord thank you Percy all right sir of

course I know of you excuse

me you're early on the scene I must

say not that there's much in it for you

my lord plain case of suicide it appear

s yes oh expect you're waiting to see

how your snaps have turned out Miss F oh

yes thank

you and we've identified the man oh well

done inspector yes well I didn't think

we'd have too much trouble a foreign

looking gentleman like that and was he a

foreigner oh yes a a Russian or

something of the sort Paul Alexis called

Schmid but he called himself Paul

Alexis one of the professional dancers

at the hotel where you're staying Miss

vain good

Heavens really

M poor

man did he leave a note anywhere well if

he did we've not found

it nor the body

neither is a bit of a bother that yes no

body no inquest have his carcass or the

coroner can't sit on it yes just so my

Lord just as well miss F took these

photographs otherwise you wouldn't know

there was a body quite

so coroner can't sit on a photograph

though still it looks a plain enough

case of

suicide oh do you think so don't

you

well why should a man wear gloves to cut

his own thread yes I wondered about that

and what's a man with a full beard doing

with a Razer anyway well he might have

had it before he grew the beard or he

might have bought it especially for the

purpose

yes inspector I wonder if I might see it

and if my man bunter could have a look

at it too he's a vitable barber shop of

information when it comes to

razors andic my Lord yes endut he is or

was since he's now retired one of the

most exclusive gentleman's hairdresses

in the West End so exclusive that one

had to have had one's name for 300 years

in De Bret in order to secure so much as

short bat and sides and he preferred to

the end to be known by the oldfashioned

description of

Barber very slight crack in the andle

Malone

yes owned my dear shlock as you will no

doubt have deduced by a middle-aged man

of short temper and careless habits with

a stiff beard and expensive tastes

absolutely my view entirely

[Laughter]

you will have your little joke my

Lord oh would you care to see the other

exhibits oh very good of your

inspector cranial capacity on the small

side brilliant ordinary stinking variety

last year's hat reblocked with a new

ribbon

style a little more emphatic than his

quite

necessary deduction not wealthy but Keno

is a personal

appearance ah the cigarette cases par

all right 15 C gold playing fairly new

monogram PA probably a gift from a

wealthy female

admirer uh

waiter isn't Mr Alexis here tonight I

believe not Madam why not is he ill uh I

don't think so Madam I'm sure Madam M

Anan would be happy

too no thank you it really doesn't

matter handkerchief silk and an

unfortunate color it did match his socks

yes I dare say it

would laundry Mark wilam sanitary Steam

Laundry my Lord all correct well done

constable

glove mass produced Shamy leather you

took this off his hand yes soaked with

blood soak not dried no no that was that

was what was so awful it was still

dripping

Sho thin cell fairly

new foul color worse

shape and made my Lord yes so harded

appearance is due to malice of

forethought made to measure for Mr

Alexis and wilin my Lord I checked this

morning quick work Constable you're

obviously destined for greatness slight

traces of uh salt water on the SE none

on the uppers so

inference walked across the wet sand but

didn't actually wait in the water I

tried it in the footprints it fitted

exactly and according to miss fain's

photographs my Lord there were only one

set of footprints out to the Rock so it

had to be suicide unless the murderer

came from the sea which as you are about

to observe inspector is

absurd I would love to savor the wonders

of wilam with you but V and I must leave

instantly for Epsom

Epsom where Mr endut lives in virtuous

retirement to pursue the matter of the

Razer and the middle-age man of short

temper and careless habits with a stiff

beard and expensive tastes what a

wonderful memory you

have I grant you that the razor is

important but why do you still think it

wasn't

suicide maybe the two go together one of

the many things I love about you Harriet

is your

percipience bunter would Mr endic could

have sold one of his handmade razors to

a jigo called Paul Alexis certainly not

to a gentleman who wore that hat and

those shoes and whose handkerchief most

unfortunately matched his socks Mr endut

sold his handmade razors exclusively to

his own clients and highly favored ones

of that moreover each one has a serial

number so until you find out how that

razor got into the hands of Paul Alexis

I wouldn't be satisfied to call it

suicide still I'm sorry oh best beloved

to turn myself away from you not at all

I was going to say I've got plenty of

work to do of course the fountain pen

mystery don't forget our Mur if it was

murder oh you might try to turn around

the dance FL with the other dancing

party see if you get any gossip about PA

Alexis very well but I shall have to get

a better evening frog get a wine colored

one I've always longed to see you in

wine color

bu

Peter yes port or

burgundy what the frog oh Claret chatow

Margo 93 or thereabouts I'm not

particular within a year or

two I should like to know if anything

has happened happened uh I'm afraid I

don't know any more than that lady Miss

vain she arrived here with the police

she might be I do apologize for

bothering you yes can I help you uh my

name is is Flora Welden uh the

receptionist said you would know you

know the police here well not exactly no

but why a very dear friend uh Mr Paul

Alexis he's he's one of the professional

dancers here should we go into the

lounge oh um yes it's it's about Mr

Alexis

you see I haven't seen him since uh the

evening before last and that that's most

unusual because to sit down and tell me

everything you

know the chambermaid said that there

were Dreadful rumors about uh something

having having happened to Paul uh to Mr

Alexis but nobody nobody will actually

tell me anything please miss F tell me

what's what's going on well Mrs Wen I'm

afraid something rather beastly has

happened yesterday I was down by the

seashore and I came across a man lying

there

dead and it seems it was Paul

Alexis oh

no I I know he wasn't

strong was it a a heart attack no I'm

afraid not what

then Mrs Wen please tell me his throat

was

cut oh

God you get me a double Brandy please

quickly I'm so

sorry I must look

Dreadful not that it matters now with

Paul

I'm afraid you must think I'm very silly

no not at all if Paul Alexis was a

friend of yours he was a very dear

friend he was much more than

that would you like a cigarette oh yes

please he was

Paul

was so handsome and

graceful of course all the women ran

after him but uh he he was lonely just

as I

was the first night I was here

he he came over and asked me to

dance and it seemed as if we

were we were drawn

together it was as though the moment our

eyes met

we we knew we were meant for each

[Music]

[Applause]

other we dance together every night

[Music]

we had to be careful you see people say

such horrid things and uh I was a little

bit older than he

was I used to worry about it but Paul

used to say my

flora it is the heart that counts and

your heart is just

17 it was beautiful of

him but quite true I I felt 17 when I

was of course I was married scandalously

young you might not think that I'm old

enough my dear but I I do have a

grown-up

son but Henry has been a great

disappointment to

me he has no heart and and that seems so

strange

because I'm all heart

if only he'd been kinder to me after my

husband died but it seemed that all

Henry was interested in was was the

money and of course all that was was

left to me oh

really my marriage wasn't

happy but it wasn't my husband's fault

he just was not

very

sensitive and after he died and I was I

was left

alone

well one can't be blamed for wanting to

snat a little happiness can one no no

absolutely not oh you are so kind my

dear and so clever I know you write

detective books oh please miss

Bane please tell me who they think

murdered

Paul well I'm afraid Mrs well I'm I'm

afraid they think it was suicide

side oh

no no that's impossible I noticed oh Mrs

won I found the body no no

no he would never have killed himself

when he was so

happy you see Miss

vain we were going to be married

[Music]

there's the place

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

Lord B what time have you 10 minutes to

5 my Lord

[Music]

I almost feel we should synchronize our

watches before going up the drive or

over the top my

Lord

B how do you suppose a retired Colonel's

Razer came to cut the throat of a

professional dancing partner yes an

intriguing question

Bel and one requiring a certain de

delicacy at

approach well all I can say is damn it

is a damned ungentlemanly business gun

and asking a fellow's barber questions

behind his back and as for being mixed

up in the death of some Deo you want to

be ashamed of yourself so interfering

with the police that's their business

awfully sorry sir the trob is detecting

is my hobby a fellow has to have a hobby

of some kind well I dare say my God he

take up golf for beating spendal come

quite right so much more appropriate

trouble is um I got interested in

intelligence during the war and one

thing led to another really oh school

friend of mine was in intelligence bited

spender what an extraordinary

coincidence we were together at chatow

door just before the song It's a bad

show that yes we tried to tell them but

they wouldn't listen lost a lot of good

friends too deare so you did well what

do you want to know about the razor you

got from endut uh razor something what

they used to be nothing is nothing will

be damn it till we get a conservative

government do you still have it sir what

the Razer no no no I told indicot I

wondered he should make such inferior

stuff no no no gave it to my Gardner

sumers very decent sort of fell knew

he'd appreciate it well you'll take a

glass of madir this way no

wait nice Bloom s

would they be the blanch that's right

blanch plat Bean we won a prize with our

cants last year I'm not surprised not

that I know much about them m i just

take an interest in His Lordships at

Denver uh you you use a Cutthroat do you

Mr sers do you no no his lordship's

accustomed to it I prefer a safety

raising myself uh Cutthroat is an

awkward thing to have about the house if

you've no use for it especially if you

have a family ah well well that's what I

thought didn't want the youngsters to

get hold of it sold it did you oh no no

no no I wouldn't like to do that Colonel

belridge is a very kind gentleman in

spite of his manner but worse than his

bite as they say that's it exactly I

wouldn't like to hurt his feelings still

what the I don't see the art can't

grieve

for ah well the truth is the wife's

brother is a gentleman's hairdress in

seahampton so I gave it to him

seahampton

that's near wilam isn't it

h

[Applause]

h