Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:16,080
♪♪
2
00:00:16,082 --> 00:00:18,016
What? What?
3
00:00:20,755 --> 00:00:28,293
♪♪
4
00:00:28,295 --> 00:00:35,834
♪♪
5
00:00:35,836 --> 00:00:43,175
♪♪
6
00:00:56,857 --> 00:00:59,992
♪ big money, ballin', we gettin'
the big checks ♪
7
00:00:59,994 --> 00:01:02,260
All right!
8
00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:04,062
[ snapping ]
aah! My leg!
9
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,730
Aah! Aah! Ow!
10
00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:08,200
Hey, bud, want to go outside
for a little bit?
11
00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:10,402
I got a carrot.
I love carrots.
12
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,937
Wait a minute.
You're trying to put me down!
13
00:01:12,939 --> 00:01:14,606
Don't kill me!
I'm too young to die!
14
00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:16,941
I can still do the monologue.
Aah!
15
00:01:16,943 --> 00:01:18,610
What is going on
with my legs?!
16
00:01:18,612 --> 00:01:20,078
This is going to hurt me, boss,
17
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,146
A lot more than it's gonna
hurt you.
18
00:01:22,148 --> 00:01:24,282
Wait a minute,
you got rabies!
19
00:01:24,284 --> 00:01:25,950
I should be putting you down,
motherfucker!
20
00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:28,420
Wait! This is
the new rabies variant.
21
00:01:28,422 --> 00:01:30,355
It isn't as strong.
Haven't you heard?
22
00:01:30,357 --> 00:01:32,157
[ echoing ]
heard? Heard?
23
00:01:32,159 --> 00:01:35,027
Heard -- herd immunity!
That's it.
24
00:01:35,029 --> 00:01:37,762
Ah, yeah.
25
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:41,100
Pumpkin spice season somewhere!
26
00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:48,907
Who was that guy?
♪ don't you miss me ♪
27
00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:55,113
♪♪
28
00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:57,916
What the frick happened?
29
00:01:57,918 --> 00:01:59,784
Help. Is anybody there?
30
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:02,054
Help!
Oh, my gosh.
31
00:02:02,056 --> 00:02:04,789
Thank god, I got stuck up here.
I was hang gliding.
32
00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:07,259
I was doing
a gender reveal for my ex.
33
00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:09,594
She lives right there.
34
00:02:09,596 --> 00:02:11,996
She's having a baby girl.
Look.
35
00:02:11,998 --> 00:02:14,266
I was supposed to do that
when I landed.
36
00:02:14,268 --> 00:02:16,601
I'm trying to get in her
good graces again, you know?
37
00:02:16,603 --> 00:02:17,936
Yeah, you need help, bro.
38
00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:20,472
I had these
virtual reality goggles on.
39
00:02:20,474 --> 00:02:21,740
Then I got distracted, and --
40
00:02:21,742 --> 00:02:23,675
And I feel like an idiot.
-That's okay.
41
00:02:23,677 --> 00:02:25,077
You're not an idiot,
but you do need help.
42
00:02:25,079 --> 00:02:27,145
This is the woman
that introduced us.
43
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:29,614
Her name is ghislaine.
She's a little bit eccentric.
44
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:30,549
I lost touch with her.
45
00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:32,217
I don't know
what happened to her.
46
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,620
Hey! Randall, what are you
doing here?!
47
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:37,222
I already called dennis.
He knows you here.
48
00:02:37,224 --> 00:02:38,957
You're in violation
of the restraining order.
49
00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:40,358
No, the restraining order?
50
00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:42,827
She didn't re-up it, so --
who's this? This your bitch?
51
00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:44,362
No, I --
you [bleep] him?
52
00:02:44,364 --> 00:02:46,098
No, no, we're not dating.
53
00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:47,766
Is he your husband?
Ex.
54
00:02:47,768 --> 00:02:48,967
What the fuck
is this banner?
55
00:02:48,969 --> 00:02:50,635
Why the fuck you got me in that
picture like that?
56
00:02:50,637 --> 00:02:52,104
I was trying to do
something nice for you,
57
00:02:52,106 --> 00:02:53,572
And now you're
reprimanding me.
58
00:02:53,574 --> 00:02:54,773
Can I make a suggestion?
59
00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,775
Let's just give him help first.
Thank you.
60
00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:58,777
This is why I need a real man
in my life.
61
00:02:58,779 --> 00:02:59,978
We need to help him first.
62
00:02:59,980 --> 00:03:01,179
You kind of good looking.
63
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:02,447
Could you not
flirt with the guy.
64
00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:04,182
I'm not flirting.
I'm just being honest.
65
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:05,850
He's good looking.
He's a real man.
66
00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:08,052
He's going to help you
when you go do stupid shit.
67
00:03:08,054 --> 00:03:11,323
It's not smart, what I did.
Not exactly smart at all.
68
00:03:11,325 --> 00:03:13,726
Just pull this straight.
So, what do I --
69
00:03:13,728 --> 00:03:16,128
Oh, god! Oh! Oh, jesus!
70
00:03:16,130 --> 00:03:17,662
Oh, god, I'm gonna fall!
Don't fall.
71
00:03:17,664 --> 00:03:19,464
[ flatulence ]
I just peed myself.
72
00:03:19,466 --> 00:03:21,199
Don't pee.
We need to find something.
73
00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:23,135
Oh, my god.
Grab some sprite or something.
74
00:03:23,137 --> 00:03:25,737
I need sprite easily.
You don't need sprite, brother.
75
00:03:25,739 --> 00:03:27,472
Sprite.
Ladies and gentlemen,
76
00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:29,541
Jaden smith.
77
00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:32,144
♪♪
78
00:03:32,146 --> 00:03:34,947
Aloha.
79
00:03:34,949 --> 00:03:36,881
Hawaii.
Thank you.
80
00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:39,217
[ gunshot ]
81
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:42,220
Wow.
Jay jacob jingleheimer
82
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:46,090
Jaden smith. How are you,
you son of a hubbard?
83
00:03:46,092 --> 00:03:49,694
I'm good. You know,
just on tour and stuff.
84
00:03:49,696 --> 00:03:52,631
And now when your mom picks
her nose, does she
85
00:03:52,633 --> 00:03:53,632
Jada pick it?
86
00:03:53,634 --> 00:03:55,233
Wow. Yeah. Think so.
87
00:03:55,235 --> 00:04:00,905
If I farted around your dad,
do you think he will sniff?
88
00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:02,775
Yeah.
Shit. I'm out of coffee, man.
89
00:04:02,777 --> 00:04:04,843
Coffee drinker.
Yeah, a big coffee --
90
00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:06,911
Oh, here we go.
Jesus christ!
91
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,280
I got it dialed in.
92
00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:12,717
Oh, my fucking god!
93
00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:15,520
Oh, shit!
That desk fucking sucks.
94
00:04:15,522 --> 00:04:19,057
Yeah, that does, man.
Fuck. How do you --
95
00:04:19,059 --> 00:04:20,525
I mean.
Yeah.
96
00:04:20,527 --> 00:04:23,528
[ whirring ]
real efficient, man.
97
00:04:27,468 --> 00:04:29,267
You do cbd.
Yeah.
98
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:31,736
Cool dude pizza.
Yeah. I love --
99
00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:34,473
I don't like pizza,
but I like cbd.
100
00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:36,875
I like --
you know what I'm saying?
101
00:04:36,877 --> 00:04:39,277
And then you did the cover
of stormfront magazine,
102
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:40,879
The neo-nazi --
103
00:04:40,881 --> 00:04:44,082
Oh, my gosh!
Oh, my god!
104
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:45,818
The neo-nazis,
105
00:04:45,820 --> 00:04:49,621
They have you nude on
the cover of the magazine.
106
00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,490
Look at the magazine.
No, that's not --
107
00:04:51,492 --> 00:04:53,625
Look inside,
look at the centerfold.
108
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:54,827
Yo --
[ laughing ]
109
00:04:54,829 --> 00:04:56,428
It's crazy, right?
110
00:04:56,430 --> 00:05:01,099
What the fuck! This is full of
dudes sucking each other, bro!
111
00:05:01,101 --> 00:05:04,036
And you put me
on the fucking cover, dawg!
112
00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:05,570
This is --
what the hell?
113
00:05:05,572 --> 00:05:07,706
This narrative
is a fucking mess.
114
00:05:07,708 --> 00:05:09,374
Yeah.
115
00:05:10,777 --> 00:05:12,845
Fucking hell!
Holy shit!
116
00:05:12,847 --> 00:05:15,780
[ laughter ]
no!
117
00:05:15,782 --> 00:05:17,649
It's crazy.
118
00:05:17,651 --> 00:05:18,851
What the hell, dude?
119
00:05:22,589 --> 00:05:24,923
Aww. It's hungry.
120
00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:28,193
♪♪
121
00:05:28,195 --> 00:05:29,594
Here you go.
122
00:05:29,596 --> 00:05:33,398
♪♪
123
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:36,334
Here you go.
124
00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:37,736
What the f--
what is that?
125
00:05:37,738 --> 00:05:40,605
Chair just had a baby!
I knew you didn't wear a condom,
126
00:05:40,607 --> 00:05:42,607
Big dog!
Look at that!
127
00:05:42,609 --> 00:05:45,544
What are you gonna name
this little guy?
128
00:05:45,546 --> 00:05:47,345
That's amazing.
All right, baby.
129
00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:52,284
That's. That's incredible.
Want some worms?
130
00:05:55,222 --> 00:05:58,156
I'm eric andre,
and I'm selling homes.
131
00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:02,561
♪♪
132
00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:04,697
Hey, how you doing?
Eric. Pleasure.
133
00:06:06,901 --> 00:06:08,767
Ever seen that show
"the walking dead"?
134
00:06:08,769 --> 00:06:10,034
No.
That's me
135
00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:13,372
Before my morning coffee.
136
00:06:13,374 --> 00:06:15,574
This is a beautiful old house.
Is a craftsman.
137
00:06:15,576 --> 00:06:18,443
Working fireplace.
138
00:06:18,445 --> 00:06:19,778
You seen tracy?
139
00:06:19,780 --> 00:06:22,381
No, sir.
Tracy doesn't live here anymore.
140
00:06:22,383 --> 00:06:24,048
Yes, she does.
I know where she lives.
141
00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:26,251
She lives here.
No, this is an open house.
142
00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:28,320
Tracy's not here anymore.
I'm sorry. She moved.
143
00:06:28,322 --> 00:06:30,923
I'm doing an open house.
I got a customer.
144
00:06:30,925 --> 00:06:33,125
Sorry, buddy.
145
00:06:33,127 --> 00:06:36,795
He is obsessed with the
previous tenant or something.
146
00:06:36,797 --> 00:06:38,196
I don't know.
You know,
147
00:06:38,198 --> 00:06:40,465
He actually gave me
some poetry he wrote.
148
00:06:40,467 --> 00:06:42,867
It was, like,
actually oddly beautiful.
149
00:06:42,869 --> 00:06:46,138
Like bukowski-esque
blue collar poetry.
150
00:06:46,140 --> 00:06:47,472
It was, like, found art.
151
00:06:47,474 --> 00:06:49,474
It was actually
quite interesting.
152
00:06:49,476 --> 00:06:50,275
Yeah, but --
153
00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:52,344
Where's tracy?!
154
00:06:52,346 --> 00:06:54,279
I'm leaving.
I said, where's tracy?!
155
00:06:54,281 --> 00:06:55,880
Wait, wait, wait --
I gotta go.
156
00:06:55,882 --> 00:07:01,219
♪♪
157
00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:04,422
Ladies and gentlemen,
the wickedly talented
158
00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:06,158
Chloe cherry.
159
00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:08,961
♪♪
160
00:07:08,963 --> 00:07:11,830
Wow, what are
they doing?
161
00:07:11,832 --> 00:07:14,566
How are you?
162
00:07:14,568 --> 00:07:17,302
I'm great, how are you?
On a rocket ship to stardom.
163
00:07:17,304 --> 00:07:18,771
Oh, thank you.
That's so nice of you.
164
00:07:18,773 --> 00:07:20,773
Now, you're in "euphoria."
yes.
165
00:07:20,775 --> 00:07:22,574
How much money do you make?
166
00:07:22,576 --> 00:07:24,042
Um...
167
00:07:24,044 --> 00:07:25,910
Can somebody stop me?!
168
00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:31,383
Jim carrey in the "mask."
169
00:07:38,725 --> 00:07:41,126
Sorry about that, andre.
No worries.
170
00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,727
No worries.
171
00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:47,399
I think your mic -- I think
your mic is feeding back.
172
00:07:47,401 --> 00:07:48,400
Yeah, your mic may be
fuckin' up.
173
00:07:48,402 --> 00:07:49,668
It's a metal thing.
174
00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:51,403
You have any metal
in your outfit?
175
00:07:51,405 --> 00:07:53,205
No.
I think --
176
00:07:53,207 --> 00:07:57,476
If you eat fish,
that sometimes does it.
177
00:07:57,478 --> 00:07:59,211
I have no idea.
178
00:08:00,881 --> 00:08:03,281
[ andrew muttering ]
give me a second.
179
00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:04,817
Shit.
180
00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:09,888
Maybe a transmission, boss.
181
00:08:09,890 --> 00:08:12,691
Maybe some crackhead stole your
catalytic converter.
182
00:08:12,693 --> 00:08:16,161
Yeah, yeah, I had a guy steal my
catalytic converter
183
00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:19,364
In the parking lot.
184
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:20,933
Check this out.
185
00:08:26,173 --> 00:08:33,912
♪♪
186
00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:39,451
Eric: Oh, I'm gonna squirt!
187
00:08:41,455 --> 00:08:46,124
Oh, shit, whoo-wee!
Oh, shit.
188
00:08:46,126 --> 00:08:48,260
Oh!
Hey, what's up, man?
189
00:08:48,262 --> 00:08:50,462
I didn't know you were going to
be right there.
190
00:08:50,464 --> 00:08:52,464
Yeah.
You just got to sign right here.
191
00:08:52,466 --> 00:08:55,267
It's just one.
Yeah.
192
00:08:55,269 --> 00:08:57,269
I got a package for you.
193
00:08:59,674 --> 00:09:03,208
No, it's only one.
This is your box, too.
194
00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:06,144
I thought...
I didn't know you were gonna--
195
00:09:06,146 --> 00:09:09,281
Oh, I fucked your box.
196
00:09:09,283 --> 00:09:11,349
♪♪
197
00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:14,219
Sorry -- we were having a little
bit of a slam-azon,
198
00:09:14,221 --> 00:09:15,420
You know
what I'm saying?
199
00:09:15,422 --> 00:09:16,755
Jeff bezos doesn't
let us take breaks.
200
00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:19,224
So we took a little bit
of a break ourself,
201
00:09:19,226 --> 00:09:22,761
You know what I mean?
No, I hear ya!
202
00:09:22,763 --> 00:09:25,097
I use that hand, too.
203
00:09:25,099 --> 00:09:26,765
Mm-mm-mm.
204
00:09:26,767 --> 00:09:29,501
This is fucking crazy, man.
205
00:09:29,503 --> 00:09:31,770
I came in the box.
Speaking of packages,
206
00:09:31,772 --> 00:09:33,372
You got a nice package, man.
You know what I'm saying.
207
00:09:33,374 --> 00:09:34,839
That's what I'm talking about.
208
00:09:34,841 --> 00:09:37,242
I fingered myself with that
pen, and that's my ejaculate.
209
00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:39,244
Yeah. Look, I looked at that pen
once, unh-uh,
210
00:09:39,246 --> 00:09:40,645
I don't know
what the hell to say.
211
00:09:40,647 --> 00:09:43,181
I don't know what to tell you,
man, you wa looking good today.
212
00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:45,984
Checking out what we're going
to be working with later on.
213
00:09:45,986 --> 00:09:48,853
We would love
to have our way with you.
214
00:09:48,855 --> 00:09:51,389
Oh, no, I'm good.
You want to take a ride with us?
215
00:09:51,391 --> 00:09:53,992
In the mood for vanilla,
my man, you know what I mean?
216
00:09:53,994 --> 00:09:55,260
I say what, phew!
217
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:57,930
What's going on?
I'm confused as hell right now!
218
00:09:57,932 --> 00:10:00,332
You look like you could use
a relaxation device.
219
00:10:00,334 --> 00:10:02,134
Nah, I'm straight, man, sorry.
220
00:10:02,136 --> 00:10:04,937
What we do in the van
stays in the van,
221
00:10:04,939 --> 00:10:06,871
You know what I'm sayin'?
Pound it.
222
00:10:06,873 --> 00:10:09,007
I'm going to eat this man out.
223
00:10:09,009 --> 00:10:13,545
Yeah, nah.
Only on anazom.
224
00:10:13,547 --> 00:10:17,682
Streaming now only on anazom.
225
00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:20,419
Ladies and gentlemen,
the chainsmokers.
226
00:10:20,421 --> 00:10:23,956
Hey.
227
00:10:23,958 --> 00:10:25,757
Bon appetit.
228
00:10:25,759 --> 00:10:28,827
These young boys
got to learn their lessons.
229
00:10:28,829 --> 00:10:31,964
You got to deejay.
230
00:10:31,966 --> 00:10:35,700
Yeah.
Bringing scorpions out.
231
00:10:35,702 --> 00:10:37,770
Keep deejaying.
232
00:10:39,439 --> 00:10:41,239
Oh, my god.
233
00:10:41,241 --> 00:10:42,907
Scorpions are dangerous.
234
00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:47,245
Get the tarantula.
No, no, no, no, no!
235
00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:54,720
Can somebody stop me?!
[ belching ]
15533
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof