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1
00:00:06,590 --> 00:00:08,592
Hey, Tiffany, you have a second?
2
00:00:08,592 --> 00:00:10,594
- For you, I got 20.
- Great.
3
00:00:10,594 --> 00:00:13,597
Um... okay, uh...
4
00:00:13,597 --> 00:00:15,599
You know Terry busted
the dishwasher,
5
00:00:15,599 --> 00:00:18,728
and bills are piling up.
6
00:00:18,728 --> 00:00:20,896
I'm gonna have to get a job,
really, any job.
7
00:00:20,896 --> 00:00:24,108
So I need you
to help me out more with...
8
00:00:24,108 --> 00:00:27,528
or really at all, with the kids.
9
00:00:27,528 --> 00:00:29,238
No problem. [chuckles]
10
00:00:29,238 --> 00:00:32,032
Not to toot my own horn,
but toot-toot,
11
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:34,535
I did a pretty good job
of raising my own kids.
12
00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:37,079
[grunting]
13
00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:38,831
Don't worry about
this moldy old tent
14
00:00:38,831 --> 00:00:40,750
messing up your kitchen.
15
00:00:43,252 --> 00:00:45,296
It's going in the living room.
16
00:00:45,296 --> 00:00:49,133
[playful music]
17
00:00:49,133 --> 00:00:51,343
I supposed I could
step it up a bit.
18
00:00:51,343 --> 00:00:52,720
Thank you.
19
00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:54,555
And there...
there is one more thing.
20
00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:56,182
- Um...
- Uh-huh?
21
00:00:56,182 --> 00:00:59,685
I really need you to stop
having all of your...
22
00:00:59,685 --> 00:01:03,272
your gentlemen callers come by.
23
00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:05,357
Beth, God,
24
00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:07,151
you... you have
the wrong idea about me.
25
00:01:07,151 --> 00:01:09,737
- I am not that kind of woman.
- [toilet flushes]
26
00:01:09,737 --> 00:01:11,447
Well, there's no judgment.
27
00:01:11,447 --> 00:01:13,324
I just can't have the boys
seeing you bring home
28
00:01:13,324 --> 00:01:15,367
every Tom, Dick, and Harry.
29
00:01:15,367 --> 00:01:16,869
Okay...
30
00:01:16,869 --> 00:01:20,289
we got to hit the road, Tiff.
31
00:01:20,289 --> 00:01:22,458
For the record,
his name is Joe.
32
00:01:24,794 --> 00:01:30,800
[whimsical music]
33
00:02:12,925 --> 00:02:15,427
Uh, what are you doing,
Uncle Terry?
34
00:02:15,427 --> 00:02:17,346
I was, uh...
35
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:19,306
I was starting to feel like
a guest on the sofa,
36
00:02:19,306 --> 00:02:23,269
but I want to be more permanent
around here, so, uh...
37
00:02:23,269 --> 00:02:26,188
I'm creating my own
personal living space.
38
00:02:26,188 --> 00:02:29,900
I guess that makes sense,
kind of.
39
00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:31,610
Hey, what's with the lemons?
40
00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:32,820
You know, if you want to learn
about juggling,
41
00:02:32,820 --> 00:02:34,488
your Uncle Terry's the man.
42
00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:36,323
I spent two weeks
at Cirque du Soleil camp...
43
00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:38,242
till I got into a fight
with a loud-mouthed mime.
44
00:02:38,242 --> 00:02:40,286
No one puts me
in an invisible box.
45
00:02:40,286 --> 00:02:41,704
No, actually,
I was thinking
46
00:02:41,704 --> 00:02:43,163
of opening up
my own lemonade stand,
47
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:44,790
and giving the money to Mom.
48
00:02:44,790 --> 00:02:46,625
That's a great idea.
49
00:02:46,625 --> 00:02:48,752
You know, your father and I
did that when we were kids.
50
00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:50,504
You... you... you should use
the, uh, the... the... the...
51
00:02:50,504 --> 00:02:52,548
that crazy lemon squeezer
he invented for us.
52
00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:54,466
I think I saw it
down in the basement,
53
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:56,385
last time I accidentally
locked myself in the basement.
54
00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:57,887
You know what?
I'll go get it.
55
00:02:57,887 --> 00:02:59,471
You just keep
airing this tent out.
56
00:02:59,471 --> 00:03:00,931
Yeah, and don't worry
about the spiders.
57
00:03:00,931 --> 00:03:02,516
Those little eight-legged
bloodsuckers
58
00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,393
are more scared of you
than you are of them,
59
00:03:04,393 --> 00:03:05,477
especially the babies.
60
00:03:05,477 --> 00:03:07,438
Spiders? [gasps]
61
00:03:07,438 --> 00:03:09,398
[Sam]
As a spelling bee runner-up,
62
00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:12,192
it hurts to write
"olde" with an E.
63
00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:15,195
Also, I'm pretty sure
that "timey" isn't a word.
64
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,823
Liam told me to write that
because we're building a brand,
65
00:03:17,823 --> 00:03:20,367
and nostalgia is very now,
66
00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:21,911
whatever that means.
67
00:03:21,911 --> 00:03:23,662
Check out my dad's Squeezerator.
68
00:03:23,662 --> 00:03:25,581
You put lemons in like this,
69
00:03:25,581 --> 00:03:28,375
and...
70
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:30,044
press the red button.
71
00:03:30,044 --> 00:03:31,837
- [horn honks]
- Ta-da.
72
00:03:31,837 --> 00:03:34,924
- That's amazing...
- [squeaking]
73
00:03:34,924 --> 00:03:37,009
And it's definitely
gonna give me nightmares.
74
00:03:37,009 --> 00:03:39,094
You guys have
a serious problem.
75
00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:41,013
Those new neighbor kids opened
their own lemonade stand
76
00:03:41,013 --> 00:03:42,723
around the corner.
77
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,184
They've got free Krazy Straws
and a shade-brella.
78
00:03:45,184 --> 00:03:46,769
Isn't there room
79
00:03:46,769 --> 00:03:49,146
for more than one lemonade stand
in the neighborhood?
80
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:52,566
Of course not.
Haven't you read "Outliers"?
81
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:55,027
Or any Gladwell at all?
82
00:03:55,027 --> 00:03:57,905
Oh, boys, you are so lucky
that I'm here.
83
00:03:57,905 --> 00:03:59,198
I'm going to give you
the benefit
84
00:03:59,198 --> 00:04:01,241
of my prodigious
business acumen.
85
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:03,243
I have no idea what that means.
86
00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,162
That means
when life gives you Liam,
87
00:04:05,162 --> 00:04:07,790
you make Liam-ade.
88
00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:09,291
I think we'll be okay
on our own.
89
00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:11,210
That's what
Bernard J. Whittle said.
90
00:04:11,210 --> 00:04:13,337
Who's Bernard J. Wittle?
91
00:04:13,337 --> 00:04:15,214
Exactly.
92
00:04:15,214 --> 00:04:19,593
[light music]
93
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:22,096
- Here you go.
- Enjoy.
94
00:04:22,096 --> 00:04:23,681
Tell your friends!
95
00:04:23,681 --> 00:04:26,100
And tell them I had
nothing to do with the spelling.
96
00:04:26,100 --> 00:04:28,852
Hey, look,
it's Bobby and Tyra,
97
00:04:28,852 --> 00:04:31,397
those neighbor kids
Liam was talking about.
98
00:04:31,397 --> 00:04:33,065
Hey, guys!
99
00:04:33,065 --> 00:04:36,276
How's it going
with the lemonade... stand?
100
00:04:36,276 --> 00:04:38,779
[both screaming]
101
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:41,657
- No!
- No! Please stop!
102
00:04:41,657 --> 00:04:43,909
- Ah!
- [gasps]
103
00:04:43,909 --> 00:04:46,412
Those jerks.
104
00:04:46,412 --> 00:04:49,456
Why is this water sticky?
105
00:04:49,456 --> 00:04:51,500
It's Mountain Dew!
106
00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:53,377
[stammers] I'm not allowed
to drink this stuff.
107
00:04:53,377 --> 00:04:55,713
My mom says it gives me
the sugar shakes.
108
00:04:55,713 --> 00:04:58,298
[slurping]
109
00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:02,136
[soft comical music]
110
00:05:02,136 --> 00:05:03,971
Okay...
111
00:05:03,971 --> 00:05:06,098
getting the Astrovan clean.
112
00:05:06,098 --> 00:05:07,933
You know, needs to be
semi-presentable
113
00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:11,103
if I'm gonna be driving
rideshare customers around.
114
00:05:11,103 --> 00:05:13,564
So, listen, guys,
Tiffany's gonna be watching you
115
00:05:13,564 --> 00:05:15,816
a little more
now that I have a job,
116
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:18,902
so I need you to mind her.
117
00:05:18,902 --> 00:05:21,613
Got it, Mom.
118
00:05:21,613 --> 00:05:23,198
Malcolm Gladwell
and I warned you.
119
00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:25,200
- [sighs]
- Business is war.
120
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,495
But you can't just fold after
one minor market disruption.
121
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:30,414
You're right.
122
00:05:30,414 --> 00:05:31,874
I need to get even.
123
00:05:31,874 --> 00:05:34,376
An excellent counterstrategy.
124
00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:36,920
Leave it up to my brains
and Dash's brawn.
125
00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:38,714
I have brains, too.
126
00:05:38,714 --> 00:05:41,341
I just like to use them
for breaking stuff.
127
00:05:41,341 --> 00:05:43,135
Whoa, whoa, guys,
128
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:46,221
I never said I wanted
to break anything.
129
00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:48,140
Don't be so sure.
130
00:05:48,140 --> 00:05:52,019
Free love is great,
but revenge is sweet, too.
131
00:05:52,019 --> 00:05:55,773
No, no. No one's getting
revenge on anyone.
132
00:05:55,773 --> 00:05:57,691
What kind of advice is that?
133
00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:00,152
The same kind
my mom's mom gave me.
134
00:06:00,152 --> 00:06:03,614
Of course, she was the enforcer
on her roller derby team.
135
00:06:03,614 --> 00:06:07,451
[chuckling nervously]
136
00:06:07,451 --> 00:06:10,245
[Terry coughs]
137
00:06:10,245 --> 00:06:11,872
Hey. What are you doing?
138
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,416
Just laying out my bienvenue.
139
00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:16,335
That's French for "welcome mat."
140
00:06:16,335 --> 00:06:18,045
No, what are you doing
to my house?
141
00:06:18,045 --> 00:06:20,339
Uh, increasing its value.
142
00:06:20,339 --> 00:06:21,715
I just added an extra bedroom
143
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:24,259
and a quarter bath.
144
00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:26,762
Oh. Um, okay...
145
00:06:26,762 --> 00:06:28,889
Terry, this is...
146
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:30,974
this is a terrible idea.
147
00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:34,061
[chuckles] You sound...
you sound just like Patty.
148
00:06:34,061 --> 00:06:35,896
It's like that time, the...
the one time I went to him
149
00:06:35,896 --> 00:06:38,023
with my own idea
for an awesome invention,
150
00:06:38,023 --> 00:06:39,525
and he...
he didn't get it either.
151
00:06:39,525 --> 00:06:41,568
When was this?
152
00:06:41,568 --> 00:06:44,154
It was a few years ago.
153
00:06:44,154 --> 00:06:45,906
He said my idea was stupid,
154
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,324
and so I said,
"No, you're stupid."
155
00:06:47,324 --> 00:06:48,826
And that's
kind of ridiculous,
156
00:06:48,826 --> 00:06:51,912
'cause he was
the smartest guy I knew.
157
00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:54,456
We got into this whole fight,
and I... I... I stormed out.
158
00:06:54,456 --> 00:06:57,126
Really? He never told me that.
159
00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:00,546
That was the last thing
I ever said to my brother.
160
00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:04,133
- Um, I...
- Oh, Terry...
161
00:07:04,133 --> 00:07:05,759
Oh...
162
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,761
[somber music]
163
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,638
I... I...
164
00:07:09,638 --> 00:07:11,515
I thought there'd be time
to fix it, you know.
165
00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:13,851
I thought...
166
00:07:13,851 --> 00:07:15,769
I thought I could make it right.
I should've called him.
167
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:17,980
I... I...
168
00:07:17,980 --> 00:07:19,982
There wasn't any time.
169
00:07:19,982 --> 00:07:22,025
Yeah, I know how you feel.
170
00:07:22,025 --> 00:07:24,236
I mean, there's never
enough time, you know.
171
00:07:24,236 --> 00:07:26,196
I still have so many things
172
00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:28,282
I want to talk to Patrick
about, too, but...
173
00:07:28,282 --> 00:07:30,367
- [bell dings]
- Oh, my waffles are ready.
174
00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:32,244
- [knocking on door]
- [mouths word]
175
00:07:35,122 --> 00:07:36,832
Hi, Sam. Come on in.
176
00:07:36,832 --> 00:07:39,042
Wyatt, Sam's here.
177
00:07:39,042 --> 00:07:41,044
Oh, hey, Sam. What's up?
178
00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:42,963
I'm quitting
the lemonade business.
179
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,840
Consider this
my two-minute notice.
180
00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:46,925
What? Why?
181
00:07:46,925 --> 00:07:49,720
Bobby and Tyra hired
that big seventh grader,
182
00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:51,388
who's already shaving,
183
00:07:51,388 --> 00:07:54,099
and they crammed me
in a locker after school.
184
00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:56,351
Those guys are such jerks.
185
00:07:56,351 --> 00:07:58,562
[sighs] I'm sorry, Wyatt,
186
00:07:58,562 --> 00:08:00,272
but I need to
stay alive long enough
187
00:08:00,272 --> 00:08:02,357
to find out how
the "Star Wars" movies end.
188
00:08:04,735 --> 00:08:07,321
[door closes]
189
00:08:07,321 --> 00:08:09,072
Uncle Terry?
190
00:08:09,072 --> 00:08:11,116
[Terry] Our armies
are ready for victory,
191
00:08:11,116 --> 00:08:12,492
but we shall reconvene tomorrow.
192
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:15,204
That is all for now.
193
00:08:15,204 --> 00:08:18,290
And, Achilles,
tend to that heel.
194
00:08:18,290 --> 00:08:24,213
[enchanting music]
195
00:08:24,213 --> 00:08:26,882
Hey, champ. How's it going?
196
00:08:26,882 --> 00:08:28,592
Not good.
197
00:08:28,592 --> 00:08:31,094
These kids are really
messing with me, Dad.
198
00:08:31,094 --> 00:08:33,388
I'm so mad, I don't know
what I feel like doing.
199
00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:36,433
Whoa, whoa, whoa, now,
slow your roll there, buddy.
200
00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:38,518
Let's take a cue
from our friend, Achilles.
201
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:40,729
He also got mad, and you know
what happened to him.
202
00:08:40,729 --> 00:08:42,898
He became a hero?
203
00:08:42,898 --> 00:08:44,441
Well, yeah, he did,
204
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:46,193
but he also died in battle
205
00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:47,986
after launching
an all-out attack on Troy.
206
00:08:47,986 --> 00:08:49,655
Now, look, the Greeks won,
207
00:08:49,655 --> 00:08:51,240
but only because they got
a little sneaky.
208
00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:53,116
- My point is...
- Ah! I will destroy you
209
00:08:53,116 --> 00:08:55,410
with my laser sword!
210
00:08:55,410 --> 00:08:57,621
Wait a minute,
that's a bug zapper.
211
00:08:57,621 --> 00:08:59,915
- No, it's a...
- [insect buzzing]
212
00:08:59,915 --> 00:09:02,209
- Dang, it is a bug zapper.
- Told you.
213
00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:04,836
See, this is a laser sword.
214
00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:06,213
[sword droning]
215
00:09:06,213 --> 00:09:07,756
- Run!
- [both yelling]
216
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:09,883
Hold on a sec.
This I got to see.
217
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:12,344
No, Wyatt, Wyatt, we got to talk
about what's going on with you!
218
00:09:16,515 --> 00:09:19,226
[Terry] Are you sure
you don't want a waffle?
219
00:09:22,688 --> 00:09:25,399
Tiffany, seriously?
220
00:09:25,399 --> 00:09:26,900
I thought you were
making lunches
221
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:28,735
and helping the kids
with their homework.
222
00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,530
For your information, I have
excellent reasons for that.
223
00:09:31,530 --> 00:09:33,490
Which are?
224
00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:35,367
- Oh, you want to hear them?
- Mm-hmm.
225
00:09:35,367 --> 00:09:37,202
Okay... [scoffs]
226
00:09:37,202 --> 00:09:40,330
Homework is just
a mind-control tool
227
00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:43,333
used by the dominant paradigm
to subjugate its citizenry.
228
00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:46,712
Uh-huh. And lunch?
229
00:09:46,712 --> 00:09:49,506
- Give me a second on that one.
- Oh, you are unbelievable.
230
00:09:49,506 --> 00:09:51,967
[stammering]
All I asked
231
00:09:51,967 --> 00:09:54,094
was that you help out
a little with the kids,
232
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:55,929
and this is what I get?
233
00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:58,974
Who do you think
I'm beading these necklaces for?
234
00:09:58,974 --> 00:10:01,935
[light brass music]
235
00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:03,812
In case they ever get a cat.
236
00:10:03,812 --> 00:10:05,897
[sighs]
237
00:10:05,897 --> 00:10:07,691
I need your help.
238
00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,901
I want to get even with
those idiot neighbor kids.
239
00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:12,070
I've been expecting you,
grasshopper.
240
00:10:12,070 --> 00:10:14,323
- Who-hopper?
- Don't worry about it.
241
00:10:14,323 --> 00:10:16,742
Come sit at my feet,
while I devise a clever plan.
242
00:10:16,742 --> 00:10:18,910
[sighs]
243
00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:24,166
- What do you have there, Dash?
- Nothing. Butt out.
244
00:10:24,166 --> 00:10:26,501
Whatever.
It's revenge time. Listen up.
245
00:10:26,501 --> 00:10:28,420
Word on the street is
the neighbors have muscled up,
246
00:10:28,420 --> 00:10:30,630
so we're gonna have to
get super sneaky.
247
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:33,425
Sneaky.
Sneaky like the Greeks.
248
00:10:33,425 --> 00:10:36,511
- I like it.
- You lost me.
249
00:10:36,511 --> 00:10:38,972
And I was already
a little lost to begin with.
250
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:41,516
You know how they used
a Trojan Horse to win the war.
251
00:10:41,516 --> 00:10:43,643
Maybe we could do
something like that.
252
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:46,271
I've read all about it in
Dad's chapter on the Trojan War.
253
00:10:46,271 --> 00:10:48,148
Well played, Wyatt.
You get a cookie.
254
00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:51,193
We have cookies?
255
00:10:51,193 --> 00:10:53,695
Trojan Horse it is.
256
00:10:53,695 --> 00:10:56,406
We'll put you inside
that empty patio-furniture box
257
00:10:56,406 --> 00:10:59,242
in the basement and leave it
at the neighbor's gate.
258
00:10:59,242 --> 00:11:01,995
They'll bring it into the yard,
you'll slip out a trapdoor,
259
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:05,540
sabotage their
lemonade supply, and...
260
00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:07,876
And replace
their sugar with salt.
261
00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:10,128
That will ruin everything.
262
00:11:10,128 --> 00:11:12,422
I like it. Dash, you in?
263
00:11:12,422 --> 00:11:14,800
Hey, you had me at "cookies."
264
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:19,805
[comical music]
265
00:11:19,805 --> 00:11:21,598
Can you drive quickly?
266
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:22,849
I have a job interview,
and I want to get there early.
267
00:11:22,849 --> 00:11:25,685
No problem. You need, I speed.
268
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:28,563
- [squish]
- What the...
269
00:11:28,563 --> 00:11:31,066
[gasps] Oh...
oh, no, I'm so sorry.
270
00:11:31,066 --> 00:11:33,026
That's my son's pudding cup.
271
00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:35,529
This can't be happening,
not today!
272
00:11:35,529 --> 00:11:38,448
Oh, wait, don't go!
Um... I need this job,
273
00:11:38,448 --> 00:11:40,951
and I really can't afford
another zero-star rating,
274
00:11:40,951 --> 00:11:43,829
so I promise you,
I can fix this.
275
00:11:43,829 --> 00:11:45,747
[chuckles]
Also...
276
00:11:45,747 --> 00:11:48,417
there's a half a grilled cheese
stuck to your briefcase.
277
00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:54,798
- [both grunting]
- [exhales deeply]
278
00:11:57,050 --> 00:11:59,302
[doorbell buzzes]
279
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:02,139
Remember, stay quiet.
You're furniture.
280
00:12:02,139 --> 00:12:04,224
I got it, Dash. Go.
281
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:13,066
[clothes dryer buzzes]
282
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:16,111
Hey. Here we go.
283
00:12:16,111 --> 00:12:17,904
No one will ever know.
284
00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:21,366
So, would you recommend me
to your friends?
285
00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:23,034
- You were fine.
- [door opens]
286
00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:25,537
- Kind of messy, though.
- Sure, sure.
287
00:12:25,537 --> 00:12:27,456
Look what somebody
was throwing out...
288
00:12:27,456 --> 00:12:29,249
or at least left
close enough to the curb
289
00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:31,042
so that it could be
considered public property?
290
00:12:31,042 --> 00:12:33,044
Hey. Nice calves.
You a runner?
291
00:12:33,044 --> 00:12:36,631
So, who's bringing who home
around here?
292
00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:39,301
Oh, no, he's my client.
293
00:12:39,301 --> 00:12:41,219
No, I... I mean,
I picked him up.
294
00:12:41,219 --> 00:12:43,054
No, I... that's not...
that's not what I meant.
295
00:12:43,054 --> 00:12:44,431
That's not what I meant. No...
296
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:46,224
You people are nuts!
297
00:12:46,224 --> 00:12:48,435
- Hey, that's my kimono!
- Yep, he's a runner.
298
00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:50,145
Okay, well, great, you guys,
299
00:12:50,145 --> 00:12:51,688
because there goes
our new dishwasher, so...
300
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:54,649
Wait, please,
I can make this right!
301
00:12:54,649 --> 00:12:56,610
Beth hired a dishwasher?
302
00:12:56,610 --> 00:12:58,403
I thought we were
tight on money.
303
00:12:58,403 --> 00:13:00,113
Tiffany, check it out.
304
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,781
[grunts] Oh, yeah.
305
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,867
Best seat in the house.
[exhales sharply]
306
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:04,826
Okay!
307
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:10,832
[mysterious music]
308
00:13:12,209 --> 00:13:14,711
Coast is clear.
309
00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:18,798
[grunts]
310
00:13:34,564 --> 00:13:36,691
[Tyra]
We'll do it later, Mom!
311
00:13:36,691 --> 00:13:39,528
[woman]
No, you'll put it away now.
312
00:13:39,528 --> 00:13:41,738
[Tyra]
I'll be right there!
313
00:13:59,548 --> 00:14:01,550
[cell phone bloops]
314
00:14:03,718 --> 00:14:05,720
Oh, my God,
Wyatt's stuck in the box.
315
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:07,973
Why is Wyatt in a box?
316
00:14:07,973 --> 00:14:10,475
Oh, yeah, I totally forgot
about that.
317
00:14:10,475 --> 00:14:13,061
Come on!
318
00:14:13,061 --> 00:14:15,522
[door open, closes]
319
00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:17,983
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where you boys headed?
320
00:14:17,983 --> 00:14:19,609
- Outside.
- Upstairs.
321
00:14:19,609 --> 00:14:21,069
And where's Wyatt?
322
00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,697
- Outside.
- Upstairs.
323
00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:25,365
Okay.
324
00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:34,207
- It's locked.
- It's okay. We did our best.
325
00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:37,127
Every war has collateral damage.
Ours is Wyatt.
326
00:14:37,127 --> 00:14:40,463
We should get out of here
before his loss in vain.
327
00:14:40,463 --> 00:14:42,716
Why do you boys
bother lying to me?
328
00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:45,552
I've been lying to the man
since the man was a little boy.
329
00:14:45,552 --> 00:14:47,178
Where's Wyatt?
330
00:14:47,178 --> 00:14:49,264
He's trapped in a box
in this backyard.
331
00:14:49,264 --> 00:14:52,183
That's a new one. Stand aside.
332
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:01,735
Tiffany, one, the man, zero.
333
00:15:01,735 --> 00:15:03,820
Nice moves.
334
00:15:03,820 --> 00:15:05,238
I'm impressed.
335
00:15:10,285 --> 00:15:12,329
I am no longer impressed.
336
00:15:12,329 --> 00:15:14,873
What are you guys
doing here?
337
00:15:14,873 --> 00:15:17,375
I don't like your tone,
young lady.
338
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:20,086
That's no way
to talk to... guests.
339
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,755
And I especially don't like
340
00:15:21,755 --> 00:15:23,381
that you attacked
Wyatt's lemonade stand.
341
00:15:23,381 --> 00:15:25,091
What are you talking about?
342
00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:26,843
He attacked us first.
343
00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:30,305
Yeah, he bombed us with
Super Soakers for no reason.
344
00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:33,516
That's what started it all.
345
00:15:33,516 --> 00:15:35,226
Is this true?
346
00:15:35,226 --> 00:15:37,187
It was a preemptive strike.
347
00:15:37,187 --> 00:15:40,690
No, we just did it to them
before they could do it to us.
348
00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:44,903
Okay, sounds like there's plenty
of blame here to go around.
349
00:15:44,903 --> 00:15:46,363
[mischievous music]
350
00:15:46,363 --> 00:15:48,448
Oh, wh... what? Take cover!
351
00:15:52,911 --> 00:15:54,245
[grunts] Ow! Ow!
352
00:15:58,208 --> 00:16:01,419
[grunting]
353
00:16:01,419 --> 00:16:04,756
Well, don't just sit there.
Fight back!
354
00:16:04,756 --> 00:16:06,925
- Ow! Ow!
- Ow! Ow!
355
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:11,054
[grunts]
356
00:16:11,054 --> 00:16:12,722
- Oh!
- [grunts]
357
00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:14,474
[grunts]
358
00:16:19,854 --> 00:16:20,939
Hi, Wyatt.
359
00:16:23,650 --> 00:16:26,277
Welcome to the inside
of the Trojan Horse.
360
00:16:26,277 --> 00:16:29,698
I thought it would be
a lot... horsier.
361
00:16:29,698 --> 00:16:31,616
You should've been here
before I Febrezed the place.
362
00:16:31,616 --> 00:16:33,743
- [chuckles]
- Hey...
363
00:16:33,743 --> 00:16:37,038
how long do you think
the Trojan War lasted?
364
00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:38,957
Well, this lemonade fight
365
00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:40,792
has been going on
for a couple of days,
366
00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:43,920
so... a week?
367
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:46,464
Try ten years.
368
00:16:46,464 --> 00:16:48,049
Imagine that.
369
00:16:48,049 --> 00:16:50,468
That's crazy.
370
00:16:50,468 --> 00:16:53,221
This fighting stuff
is so confusing.
371
00:16:53,221 --> 00:16:56,599
A minute ago, I wanted to
crush those neighbor kids.
372
00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:59,936
Then I found out that everything
was Dash and Liam's fault.
373
00:16:59,936 --> 00:17:01,271
Everyone thinks
they have a good reason
374
00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:03,106
for starting the war,
375
00:17:03,106 --> 00:17:05,358
but there's really
no such thing.
376
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,068
And there's
way better stuff to do
377
00:17:07,068 --> 00:17:10,613
than spending time
inside a sweaty old horse.
378
00:17:10,613 --> 00:17:12,991
I just wanted to help Mom out.
379
00:17:12,991 --> 00:17:15,243
I never wanted
all this fighting.
380
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:18,913
I just wish I could stop it.
381
00:17:18,913 --> 00:17:20,790
You can.
382
00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,667
We all can.
383
00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:24,794
The key is to figure out how.
384
00:17:24,794 --> 00:17:26,421
I'll give you a hint.
385
00:17:26,421 --> 00:17:30,258
It usually starts
with an apology.
386
00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:32,469
Can I look through the eyehole?
387
00:17:32,469 --> 00:17:34,137
That's not the eyehole.
388
00:17:34,137 --> 00:17:36,765
The, uh, eyehole's
on the other end of the horse.
389
00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:38,475
- So what is...
- [chuckles]
390
00:17:38,475 --> 00:17:40,226
Oh.
391
00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:42,103
Never mind.
392
00:17:42,103 --> 00:17:44,397
So how do we get out?
393
00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:47,150
Well, there's the trapdoor
behind you or, uh...
394
00:17:47,150 --> 00:17:48,818
door number two.
395
00:17:48,818 --> 00:17:51,780
I vote the trapdoor.
396
00:17:51,780 --> 00:17:53,615
You chose wisely.
397
00:17:53,615 --> 00:17:56,242
[grunting]
Ow! Ow!
398
00:17:56,242 --> 00:17:58,620
Stop! Stop!
399
00:17:58,620 --> 00:18:01,706
[soft music]
400
00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:03,792
This war has to end now.
401
00:18:06,211 --> 00:18:09,255
Fighting only leads
to more fighting, and for what?
402
00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:13,259
To win a few yards
of lemonade turf?
403
00:18:13,259 --> 00:18:16,054
Bobby, Tyra,
404
00:18:16,054 --> 00:18:18,348
I'm sorry for getting mad
and sneaking in here,
405
00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:20,225
and I'm especially sorry
406
00:18:20,225 --> 00:18:22,769
that my dumb brothers
attacked your lemonade stand.
407
00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:24,979
Technically,
I didn't do anything.
408
00:18:27,941 --> 00:18:29,526
Okay, okay.
409
00:18:29,526 --> 00:18:31,444
I'm sorry for messing with you.
410
00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:33,154
In hindsight,
I should've offered a buyout
411
00:18:33,154 --> 00:18:36,199
before going
right to hostile takeover.
412
00:18:36,199 --> 00:18:38,660
And I'm sorry
I Super-Soaked you guys.
413
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,745
It was super stupid.
414
00:18:40,745 --> 00:18:43,581
I guess we overreacted, too.
415
00:18:43,581 --> 00:18:46,376
We're also sorry.
416
00:18:46,376 --> 00:18:49,587
So... friends?
417
00:18:52,423 --> 00:18:54,259
Nice work, Wyatt.
418
00:18:54,259 --> 00:18:57,220
Now, let's high-tail it home
before your mom busts us.
419
00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:58,888
Joe got us tickets to AC/DC,
420
00:18:58,888 --> 00:19:01,224
and I can't afford
to be grounded.
421
00:19:06,396 --> 00:19:08,022
Oh, hi, Beth.
422
00:19:08,022 --> 00:19:10,567
They say Blake Shelton
has three nipples,
423
00:19:10,567 --> 00:19:12,110
and their sources
are usually pretty...
424
00:19:12,110 --> 00:19:13,862
I know what happened.
425
00:19:13,862 --> 00:19:16,990
It's probably
just a birth defect.
426
00:19:16,990 --> 00:19:20,034
I got suspicious
when I saw you washing clothes
427
00:19:20,034 --> 00:19:22,287
and I hadn't
begged you to do it,
428
00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:25,540
so I asked the kids,
and they just... boof...
429
00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:28,585
folded like the laundry
you didn't.
430
00:19:28,585 --> 00:19:30,044
[scoffs]
431
00:19:30,044 --> 00:19:32,297
Ratted out by my own homies.
432
00:19:32,297 --> 00:19:33,923
That hurts.
433
00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:39,137
I'm sorry, Beth. I...
434
00:19:39,137 --> 00:19:41,347
I know I let you down.
435
00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:45,685
Cooking and homework,
it just isn't my...
436
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,395
Thank you.
437
00:19:47,395 --> 00:19:49,272
What?
438
00:19:49,272 --> 00:19:51,441
A lot of grandmas...
439
00:19:51,441 --> 00:19:53,151
Right, sorry...
440
00:19:53,151 --> 00:19:56,279
Uh, a lot of...
441
00:19:56,279 --> 00:19:58,865
mothers who have children
442
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:00,491
who have children,
443
00:20:00,491 --> 00:20:02,410
you know, they bake cookies
444
00:20:02,410 --> 00:20:05,455
for those children
of their children...
445
00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:09,876
But you, you risked
a lemon attack for them,
446
00:20:09,876 --> 00:20:12,503
and that means a lot to me.
447
00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:15,173
Oh, they mean a lot to me.
448
00:20:15,173 --> 00:20:17,842
They're extremely lovable,
449
00:20:17,842 --> 00:20:19,677
even that little sneak Liam.
450
00:20:19,677 --> 00:20:21,179
He's the one
who flipped on me, right?
451
00:20:21,179 --> 00:20:23,306
[chuckles] Okay...
452
00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:25,141
you want to help me
fold the laundry?
453
00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:27,226
No...
454
00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:28,645
but I will.
455
00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:37,570
[gong sounds]
456
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,822
[Terry] Oh...
457
00:20:39,822 --> 00:20:42,867
- You gonged? [chuckles]
- Uh, yeah.
458
00:20:42,867 --> 00:20:44,410
I found this weird note
459
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:46,329
in the Great Battles section
of Dad's book.
460
00:20:46,329 --> 00:20:48,206
It's for you.
461
00:20:48,206 --> 00:20:51,751
It says, "Tell Uncle Terry
to look behind the family crest
462
00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,836
and tell him I'm sorry."
463
00:20:53,836 --> 00:20:56,464
What's the family crest?
464
00:20:56,464 --> 00:21:00,218
The McKenna blazon is
three lions on a fess sable.
465
00:21:00,218 --> 00:21:01,844
What?
466
00:21:01,844 --> 00:21:03,596
Over here. Come here.
467
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,640
Have I not
shown you this before?
468
00:21:07,016 --> 00:21:09,560
Okay, that...
469
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,355
is our family crest,
470
00:21:12,355 --> 00:21:15,525
and behind it is...
471
00:21:19,028 --> 00:21:21,072
...nothing. [sighs]
472
00:21:21,072 --> 00:21:23,866
Wait.
473
00:21:23,866 --> 00:21:25,368
[uplifting music]
474
00:21:25,368 --> 00:21:27,370
[grunts]
475
00:21:30,748 --> 00:21:32,750
Oh, my God.
476
00:21:32,750 --> 00:21:35,753
[chuckling]
477
00:21:39,382 --> 00:21:41,551
The Lazy Lacer.
478
00:21:41,551 --> 00:21:43,428
[Wyatt]
What's a Lazy Lacer?
479
00:21:43,428 --> 00:21:45,930
This was the brilliant idea
I told your dad about...
480
00:21:45,930 --> 00:21:47,515
[chuckles]
481
00:21:47,515 --> 00:21:49,726
...the one he said was stupid,
but he, uh...
482
00:21:49,726 --> 00:21:51,811
he made it. He...
483
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:53,312
he built it using my design.
484
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:55,648
I mean, this...
[chuckles] This is it.
485
00:21:55,648 --> 00:21:57,942
And he said
that he was sorry.
486
00:22:00,528 --> 00:22:03,823
Yeah, I'm... I'm sorry, too.
487
00:22:03,823 --> 00:22:05,491
I'm sorry he's not here
right now,
488
00:22:05,491 --> 00:22:07,618
so I can give him
a big ol' bear hug.
489
00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:12,832
I am, too.
490
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:17,045
How about we hug
each other, huh? Come on.
491
00:22:17,045 --> 00:22:19,422
[both chuckle]
492
00:22:19,422 --> 00:22:21,466
[sniffling]
493
00:22:21,466 --> 00:22:23,843
[both sigh]
494
00:22:23,843 --> 00:22:26,721
- So what's this thing do?
- I'm glad you asked.
495
00:22:26,721 --> 00:22:28,431
Okay...
496
00:22:28,431 --> 00:22:30,308
you know how everybody wastes
497
00:22:30,308 --> 00:22:32,769
so much time every day
tying their own shoes?
498
00:22:32,769 --> 00:22:34,228
No, not really.
499
00:22:34,228 --> 00:22:35,646
Well, the Lazy Lacer
will do it for ya.
500
00:22:35,646 --> 00:22:36,856
Simply take your foot,
501
00:22:36,856 --> 00:22:38,775
put it on
the Lazy Lacer pedestal,
502
00:22:38,775 --> 00:22:41,944
and let the Lazy Lacer
do its magic.
503
00:22:41,944 --> 00:22:44,489
Push the button
and be ready to be amazed.
504
00:22:44,489 --> 00:22:45,948
[light classical music]
505
00:22:45,948 --> 00:22:48,951
[device whirring]
506
00:22:56,876 --> 00:22:59,128
[laughs]
507
00:22:59,128 --> 00:23:02,256
It's nice and slow.
Interesting.
508
00:23:02,256 --> 00:23:05,093
Human kind will never have
to tie its own laces again.
509
00:23:05,093 --> 00:23:06,719
Ka-ching! [chuckles]
510
00:23:06,719 --> 00:23:08,304
Come on, let's go show everyone
how it works.
511
00:23:08,304 --> 00:23:09,764
In a few minutes.
512
00:23:09,764 --> 00:23:11,933
It's still working
on the first loop.
513
00:23:11,933 --> 00:23:13,810
Almost there.
514
00:23:13,810 --> 00:23:16,938
Yeah, I really thought
it'd go a little faster.
515
00:23:25,321 --> 00:23:27,198
What are you butt-faces
looking at?
516
00:23:27,198 --> 00:23:29,992
- Something you want to tell us?
- Yes.
517
00:23:29,992 --> 00:23:32,537
Get away from my bed.
518
00:23:32,537 --> 00:23:34,705
I'm talking about that.
519
00:23:37,792 --> 00:23:39,961
I've never seen that before
in my life.
520
00:23:39,961 --> 00:23:41,504
We saw you hide it
in the closet.
521
00:23:41,504 --> 00:23:44,799
And the bag says
"Dash's bag" on it.
522
00:23:44,799 --> 00:23:47,009
[sighs] Fine.
523
00:23:47,009 --> 00:23:49,762
So it's a sunflower. Big deal.
524
00:23:49,762 --> 00:23:51,347
I read about them
in Dad's book,
525
00:23:51,347 --> 00:23:53,766
and I decided
to grow one on my own.
526
00:23:53,766 --> 00:23:56,477
But why were you
hiding it from us?
527
00:23:57,854 --> 00:23:59,772
I figured you guys
would laugh at me.
528
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:02,150
So go ahead and laugh.
529
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:07,113
No. Actually,
I think it's really cool.
530
00:24:07,113 --> 00:24:09,407
- You do?
- [Liam] I do, too.
531
00:24:09,407 --> 00:24:12,034
Sunflower oil
is a growth industry.
532
00:24:12,034 --> 00:24:15,163
You're ground-flooring a massive
investment opportunity.
533
00:24:15,163 --> 00:24:17,748
- You guys want to check it out?
- Nope.
534
00:24:17,748 --> 00:24:19,375
Sure.
535
00:24:19,375 --> 00:24:25,381
[gentle music]
536
00:24:26,549 --> 00:24:28,968
- Hey, Wyatt?
- Yeah?
537
00:24:28,968 --> 00:24:30,761
Tell anyone about this,
538
00:24:30,761 --> 00:24:32,972
and I'm gonna shave off
your eyebrows while you sleep.
539
00:24:32,972 --> 00:24:35,641
[chuckles]
540
00:24:35,641 --> 00:24:37,643
[upbeat music]
541
00:24:37,643 --> 00:24:39,270
Here you go, ma'am.
542
00:24:39,270 --> 00:24:40,563
Enjoy.
543
00:24:43,524 --> 00:24:45,151
I'd be careful if I was you.
544
00:24:45,151 --> 00:24:47,320
They're coming,
and they're super angry.
545
00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:49,780
- Who's coming?
- And why are they angry?
546
00:24:49,780 --> 00:24:50,823
Bobby and Tyra.
547
00:24:50,823 --> 00:24:52,200
Apparently their customers
548
00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:53,868
didn't appreciate
lemonade made with salt.
549
00:24:53,868 --> 00:24:55,661
- Who knew?
- See ya!
550
00:24:55,661 --> 00:24:59,790
Oh, no, I forgot to tell them
I swapped their sugar with salt.
551
00:24:59,790 --> 00:25:02,960
Tell my brain
to tell my legs to run!
552
00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:04,754
No, no, please...
553
00:25:04,754 --> 00:25:07,006
- [both grunt]
- [air whistling]
554
00:25:07,006 --> 00:25:08,716
- [eggs smacking]
- [both scream]
555
00:25:08,716 --> 00:25:13,763
[man singing] See
556
00:25:13,763 --> 00:25:16,224
See what you have done
557
00:25:18,309 --> 00:25:23,314
We look
558
00:25:23,314 --> 00:25:27,443
Upon the sea,
my wayward son
559
00:25:28,653 --> 00:25:30,988
You got caught with two hands
in the sugar bowl
560
00:25:30,988 --> 00:25:34,825
And your pocket's
full of plums
561
00:25:36,911 --> 00:25:40,706
Are you gonna stand there
and look me in the eye?
562
00:25:40,706 --> 00:25:42,708
Are you gonna run?
563
00:25:44,961 --> 00:25:48,756
So I pause to reflect upon
564
00:25:48,756 --> 00:25:52,802
What I might've done
565
00:25:52,802 --> 00:25:57,932
I think I'd cut and run
566
00:25:57,932 --> 00:26:01,269
Ooh
567
00:26:01,269 --> 00:26:08,276
I'd run
568
00:26:10,027 --> 00:26:12,822
Oh, but tell me
569
00:26:12,822 --> 00:26:15,533
Didn't we have fun?
570
00:26:17,868 --> 00:26:20,329
Just think
of all the bad ideas
571
00:26:20,329 --> 00:26:27,336
hat might've
never seen the sun
37725
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