Original subtitles

Chaka Hissop, join me as we tackle some... Um, okay, um, yeah, I'll call

doctor back to... Mom!

Hey, what are you doing? I thought I was supposed to pick you up from school

only two hours from now. When they find out what you did, you are so dead.

What? Your mom and my dad just texted us. Did you get it?

No, I didn't get it. It's hard to hold my phone right now.

Sorry. Well, they said that they're going to stay until Thursday, that they

some friends in Maui, and that they're going to learn how to surf.

Cool. Can you please call Mom on your phone and put it on speaker?

Why would you want to do that?

Because I need to tell them what my stepbrother said to my boyfriend, who's

telling the entire world.

Look, it was totally for your own good.

Don't tell me what's for my own good.

I need to tell mom that my stepbrother is ruining my entire life.

Relax.

Calm down. I can explain everything.

Just chill out.

I'm chill.

I'm chill. Don't try to condescend me like I'm some little kid. I'm officially

grown woman as of last week.

Okay.

I'm sorry. Now that you're 18 now...

But look, I have a few years on you, and I know what shady, shifty guys are up

to, okay?

You know what they call that guy that you hang out with?

Jake the Snake.

I'm not going to let some slimeball like that come into my house. No, never. Not

on my watch ever. No bueno.

Not for you.

Sorry.

Well, I think I'm starting to fall in love with him.

Yeah, right.

Come on, what, do you fall in love with every guy that you hang out with for,

like, a day?

No. Really? What about that douchebag that used to, like, sag his pants? He

like, dressed in the 90s or something like that. Who was that guy?

Andre. Andre.

Right, Andre.

He's an artist.

Oh, very accomplished.

And he's a musician.

Really? Anything I can hear? He failed high school for the past four years, so,

you know, he combined me and my squad.

Peachberry Coolers. Oh, my God. That sounds very classy of you.

Oh, what about that meathead guy that you hung out with? The guy with, like,

cut -off sleeves, practically wore every jersey in the fucking nation.

John. John, right. Classic John.

He's captain of the football team. Right.

Also, one of the hottest guys I have ever met.

I swear to God, his body is, like, so chiseled. He's a Greek god.

Yeah, right.

Yeah, wasn't he like mentally challenged or something? I'm pretty sure, no, I'm

like 100 % sure that I went to pick you up from school one time and he was

getting on the short bus. He's challenged. Okay, enough.

I get it. I have a lot of boyfriends.

But now, that's all over and done with since you told Jake, who told everybody

at school, that I have mouth and vag herpes.

Come on, you admit that's a little bit funny, right? Yeah, yeah.

Hilarious. Right?

Hilarious. My life is ruined.

And you couldn't be happier.

I hate you.

I really hate you. I don't think you can fathom the level and the depth

of hatred I have for you.

Now, everything is ruined.

My chance of being prom queen? Ruined. Ruined!

When I walk down the hallways at school now, people laugh at me.

My squad doesn't even talk to me anymore.

Everybody is ostracizing me.

It just hurt.

I don't know what to do now.

Look, I'm sorry. Come here, come here, come here. Don't cry, don't cry.

Look, look at me.

You're smart.

funny. You're beautiful. You have such an amazing future in front of you. These

guys are only going to get you in a bad way.

They ruin your life.

Nobody's going to impregnate me.

I went to the place downtown and I got some birth control pills. But now,

all over with.

With you interfering with your lies, nobody's going to touch me with a 10

pole, let alone love me.

How could you do this to me, Tyler?

How?

I love you.

I love you.

I'm sorry.

You know, I just... I don't know. I didn't know what to expect when I saw

guy come into our house, okay? And I had no idea it was going to be such a slime

ball, and tell her if you want, okay? But I'll tell you one thing. I'm not

I did it.

Idiot!

You're not my dad.

Don't try to act like him.

Do you mind if I come in?

Fuck off.

Yeah, no, you're right. I totally get it. I'll leave you alone.

I'm sorry.

I'm in a mood right now, and it's not just because of what you did.

You want to talk about it?

Yeah.

You hungry?

make you a sandwich, and we can talk about this.

Gluten -free, right?

No.

What? I haven't taken a real shower since the accident.

Right. And it's just when mom's not here, like, I don't have anyone to,

help me.

Oh, yeah, no, no, no. I get how that can be frustrating. I totally understand.

Well, can I help?

I could call with your girlfriend, you know, like Cindy, or...

No, I told you.

What? They're not talking to me right now.

And that's fine.

I understand exactly where they stand now. Look, I... God damn it. I

am so, so sorry. There's got to be something I can do to make up for all

Um, how about I could call your friend and tell him it was all a dick joke. I

could call Jake the snake and I could see whether or not... No, be quick. You

could make everything worse. I got a better idea. I could contact the

and he could, like, put out a lawsuit about how I was totally fucking with

You're just gonna make things worse.

What do you want me to do? I am so sorry.

Baby?

What?

No, no. That, that...

So, I mean, it wouldn't be weird or anything.

I mean, you wouldn't see me. You would wear mom's night mask on the nightstand.

And, like, you wouldn't even touch me. You'd wear my loofah gloves. So, it

be, like, fine.

Uh, you think this is appropriate?

I don't know.

I mean, it's not like you're helping me go to the bathroom or anything.

Gross. No, I'm not saying that helping you with your hygiene level is gross at

all. I'm just saying, you know, such and such, except for other, bathtub, naked,

touching. Come on, bro. Don't you think it's totally the wrong way? Come on,

bro. What?

Spend days in that shower.

So we know you got me in a pretty unique

situation right now.

It's only unique if somebody finds out about it and I can tell you 100 % I will

be taking this one to the grave. Oh my god yeah you're talking to me I'm not

talking to Saul.

What soap are we going to use?

I have no idea. I can't see a thing. How about you just choose and put it in my

hand. That's fine.

Okay.

Alrighty.

Oh man, this smells pretty good.

It's called pheromone.

It's supposed to turn guys on.

Not like I'm trying to turn you on, but, you know, suppose I meet a

tall, chiseled, handsome stranger tonight.

Tonight? You think you're going out tonight? That's not happening. You're

staying in. Is it coming out or what?

Tell me.

Maybe you're right.

More? Okay,

is that good?

Maybe you're right.

Maybe I shouldn't go out. I mean, I don't know.

I'm not 100 % sure.

Which one?

What? If I want to go out or not tonight.

All right.

Now, you ready?

No, no, no, no.

What?

You're not washing my hair.

Not until I'm sure if I'm going out or not tonight.

I don't know. One, you're not going out. And two, what the hell do you want me

to wash then?

My back.

Really?

This is your back, right?

Yes.

and smart.

Ugh, it feels so nice.

It does feel nice.

It's clean. You know, I've been thinking that this whole you ruining

all my prospects with all the hottest guys in school really isn't such a

tragedy. I knew you'd be coming around.

Why would you say that anyway?

I don't know.

I prefer older men.

I mean, not too old, but...

Someone like your age would be perfect.

What? No, I mean... What?

Look,

if you're going to just give it to a guy, they're going to take advantage of

you. You need to... You need to go on casual dates.

Come on, like, go to the beach, the museum.

Find out who someone is before you just give them your body.

I mean, what?

No, no, no. I don't give them the goods.

What? You don't have sex with them?

No. I mean, like, no.

We just, we make out and, you know, we dry hump, fondle, and if

he's lucky, then I give him an amazing handjob.

And I've just started doing them, but I gotta say, I'm like a handy pro.

I've been giving so many lately, and I only just started.

But now, that's all done with for right now. I'm healed,

so.

So wait, you're telling me that you don't have an effect with any of the

that you bring over here?

Yeah, stupid.

Are you listening to me? Don't call me stupid. Look at what I'm doing for you,

alright? Call me stupid one more time and I'm out of here.

Sorry. Look what I'm doing.

Um... Sorry.

But yeah, I mean, of course the guys, like, you know, want to have sex, but...

You know, just give them a good handy and finish them off all nice and sweet

and... I don't know, maybe I should start doing blowies, you know?

It'd buy me some time.

That way I could, like, see if a guy's truly worthy of, like, my love and time

and my sweet virgin pussy.

Wait, no, I don't think any guy that you bring around here is deserving of your

love. Or your handies, blowies, or that tight virginity of

yours. No.

Well, what type of guy should you...

Who should I be with?

You've got to be with someone athletic.

Someone that can keep up with you.

I mean, you know, when you're all healed and out and about doing your thing.

You need to... Look, if you're just going to give your love to a guy, he's

going to take advantage of you for that.

You need to get out there and casually date.

Go on hikes.

Beaches. Go to the museum.

Go...

Do something with them. You know, before you just give them your love.

Feet, please.

What? Feet, please.

Your feet?

Yeah.

Get the balls of my feet.

It's one of those weird boobies.

It feels good.

I think you're going to have the cleanest feel.

It's got a little harder.

Don't tickle me.

Is that good?

It's so good.

Can't wait for you to wash my hair.

Yeah, right.

What, you want to do this for me?

Oh, that's rude.

Yeah.

I wish you could shave my legs.

What, you can't shave your own legs?

No, I can't even hold a pen.

Do you think it's wise for me to hold a razor?

Probably true.

But I don't think you want me to be shaving your legs because I can't see a

thing.

Keep rubbing a little bit more.

I really need these legs shaved.

Oh, my God.

Like baby grit sandpaper on these things.

Will you please help me? Oh my god.

Hand me the towel. I'll cover myself up.

I'll cover myself up. Hand me the towel.

Is there a towel there?

Right there. There we are.

Perfect.

Good? Yeah.

Am I going to take these off?

Hold on.

Let me sit over there.

Um, yes.

Alright.

Okay.

Okay.

Are you ready?

Well, what am I doing? You gotta... Here.

Here's the razor. What am I doing?

Oh, you can take off the blindfold now. Oh, god, yeah, you're covered. I get it.

Stupid. Alright.

No, don't cut me.

I'm trying not to, okay?

Oh, um, I used Dad's shaving cream. It's under the sink.

Are you kidding?

Oh my God, Dad has been accusing me of stealing the shaving cream.

Sorry.

I'm kidding.

Peach fuzz.

That's kind of bad.

What? Is that gone this long?

I like this.

Yeah? I'm glad someone's having fun, man.

Do you think my legs are twiggy?

Charlotte from Cheer Squad said that they're twiggy.

Twiggy? No, come on.

Your legs are shapely.

Very woman -like.

Not Twiggy, don't worry.

Thanks, Ty.

You're good.

Okay. I think that does it, right?

Perfect.

Okay, so now you just have to shave my pussy.

What?

I'm kidding.

Real talk.

You're such a loser.

Oh my god. Okay,

so we're done here?

I was kidding about the pussy shaving, but I actually do need

to wash down there's the lady bit area.

Okay, so good luck, right?

Please, please. No, I can't do that.

Please? Well, no, I can't touch you like that. That's totally wrong.

Oh my god, no, it's fine.

Here, just put this on.

What? Put the blindfold on. Where's the glove? Put the glove on.

And you won't even see me, and you'll have the glove on, so it won't even be

like you're touching me.

It's totally not inappropriate.

That feels like a butt.

Why am I feeling a butt right now?

Because... I thought I wanted to know what I'm feeling.

Because I like to wash my pussy from behind.

So that way I can, like, spray it at the same time.

What? Yeah.

So I usually like to bend over like this.

What?

And... Spray my pussy.

Oh, my God.

Lily. From behind.

Yeah.

What am I doing?

You're going to wash it. What? With one hand.

I don't even know.

Right there.

That is a... That's a butt.

What are you... You want me to look... What? You want me to do that?

I'm going to wash my pussy from behind.

I like to spray it until I know it's 100 % clean.

Can you rub it really good? Don't, like, scold me hard.

What are you doing?

Do you want me to do that?

That.

That? Is that okay?

It's okay.

Are you sure?

Yeah.

Okay.

It's been so long.

By far, the weirdest thing I've ever done in my life.

Nobody will know.

Scrub a little bit more.

Actually, scrub it harder.

Like that?

Mm -hmm.

What is going on over there?

What? Oh, my God. Did I hurt you? Are you okay?

Yeah, they're just a little scratchy. Yeah, yeah, totally. We're done here,

right? Absolutely.

It's fine.

Well, actually, I mean, if you take this shower head

and if you spray it on my face, I rub

the petals with my first.

Can you not call it, because it's making it a lot harder.

Harder? No. Is it hard, Tyler?

No, but just, that's what I meant.

Where's the vaginal area?

And I'll launch this water at it.

Is that nice?

Is that?

Stop. Stop.

You're making it sound like you're having a hard day.

No, I'm just.

I'm using my piscis. Really?

You can get piscis everywhere.

I don't want to touch it on fire.

I don't want to touch it on fire.

It's a Sahara hole.

That's a hole.

So yay or nay?

No.

This one?

Uh -huh.

Yeah.

Okay. Righty -tighty, lucky Lizzie, right? Yeah.

Okay.

It was funny. It's like you don't even need it.

This is what I needed.

It's like it's been broken.

Come on.

Yeah, of course.

You had no idea how much I needed that.

Seriously.

I'm here to help.

Thanks, bro.

You're welcome, sis.

All right. All good?

All good.

All right.

And again, sorry, any consolation for what I did?

I'll always love you. You're my brother.

We'll be right back.

The guy I was supposed to go to a party with, he just texted

me and he was like, I could just come over and hang out.

And I was just like, no, I don't want to like roll around.

Oh, I can't, I can't be doing that.

And then he was, then he texted me. He was just like, oh, I forgot to make

with my friends.

He's not texting me anymore.

I'm

sorry.

My hair stinks.

Yeah, it kind of does.

It's all good, though.

Can you wash it for me?

No. Only because I think your mind is not in a solid place right now, and I

don't trust myself to stop you if you were to come on to me.

Dude, I would never, ever come on to you.

Like, ever.

Yeah, okay.

Sure.

No, you're so not my type. Oh, really? No, you're altruistic, you're...

ambitious. You're... You have your shit together.

And I... And I think I've been in love with you ever since my mom moved me to

this godforsaken town.

Fed, you love me?

No, no, no, no, no.

Like I said, I don't know what I'm talking about.

My head's all fucked up right now.

Like, forget it. Forget I said anything.

Forget I said anything.

Imagine he would have said that.

Please don't do anything.

Please stay out of my life.

Please love me.

Be my first, Tyler.

I don't want you to do that.

You have to be my first.

Tell me you don't want me.

I don't.

I can't tell you that I don't have to. I can't.

I don't.

How about this?

How about this?

If you get hurt from just me kissing you

and showing you my tits, then

we will fuck.

But you have to see that you're hurt.

I want you, but it's hard to tell you no.

I don't. I can't see.

Shh. How about this?

If your body wants me, you'll be my first.

And I'll use your body just like I used your hand in the shower to get myself

clean.

And then I'll use your body to master me and get myself off.

You say you love me, though.

Shut up.

Here are my terms.

I'll kiss you.

I'll show you my tits.

And then, and only then, if your heart will bang.

Aren't you the romantic?

I saw your cat growing on me.

Is that

your

cock pressing up against me?

Nobody knows me better than my brother.

Please, I popped my cherry years ago during cheer practice.

I hate pussy like that too.

Suck on my gut.

Don't fuck with me.

Thank you.

You're so lucky mom and dad aren't here.

Shhh. Let's not say that.

Go slow though.

This is slow.

The famous ninja.

That is so good.

My sister is such a blessing.

He's in me.

Please,

please, please, Tyler.

He's in me.

He wants to go for you.

I'm tripping. Please put it in me.

Ease it, ease it. It feels so good.

So good.

Just, like, look me in the eyes when you fuck me.

Just cripple my tits.

Oh, my God.

Give me the cup. Give me the cup. Give me that baby

gravy. Oh, my God.

That cock throb inside me.

Keep it deep in there. I want every drop.

Keep it deep in there.

Plug it inside of me.

It's such a big load.

I'm so warm and thick.

Oh my God, you're so hot.

Of course.

I want to do something.

What?

Will you be my first blowie?

Yeah, of course.

You can't tell Jake, though.

Are you kidding me?

Can you tell me if I'm doing it right?

So good.

It's so wet right now.

Take me to another planet.

Come on.

You're so good.

Thank you.

Just saying.

mm -hmm

Teach me how to say this.

Oh, my God.

Oh,

Lord.

You stuff me. You're stretching my pussy.

You're the only boy I like.

There's so many of them.

It's so wet for you.

I lost myself, Chrissy.

You're Chrissy now?

It's not going to be the last time you're there. Really?

Oh yeah.

I

think

we can both fit on this hub.

I think so. Like when we were younger.

Okay.