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Suspects described as white males,
approximately 25 to 30.

Suspect number one about 5'11",
medium build,

brown hair, dark pants.

Suspect number two,
about 6'1", medium build,

brown hair, round glasses,
dark clothes.

Be advised, suspects are armed

and should be considered
extremely dangerous.

Use caution apprehending them.

- Hey, Earl.
- Yes, sir.

- What do you know?
- Well,

it's a hot goddamn day.

I haven't felt it a bit.

I've been inside with the air-conditioner
blasting all daylong.

- Oh, is that right?
- That's right.

Didn't you break for lunch or nothing?

I'm by myself today,
ate my lunch out of the microwave.

Jesus H. Christ, Pete.

When you gonna learn that microwave
food will kill you faster than a bullet?

I mean, them damn burritos ain't good
for nothing but a hippie

when he's high on weed.

Pull me down a bottle of that Jack,
will you?

Yeah.

I think I'm gonna get tanked tonight.

What's the matter?

Oh, hell.

Been one long goddamn hot,
miserable, shit-ass fucking day,

every inch of the way.

First off, Nadine over at
the Blue Chip got sort of sick,

so she got that goddamn
mongoloid boy of hers working the grill.

I mean, that fucking idiot doesn't know
rat shit from Rice Krispies.

I eat breakfast about 9:00,

and I'm puking up pigs in a blanket
like a sick fucking dog by 10:30.

Isn't there a law or something against
retards serving food to the public?

Well, if there ain't, there ought to be.

I mean, who in the hell knows

what's going on in the mind
of a goddamn mongoloid?

Nadine should've hit that boy in
the head and sold the fucking milk.

You could sue the shit out of her,
you know that?

That kid belongs under a circus tent,
not flipping burgers.

- You could own that fucking place.
- Oh, shit, Pete.

What would I do with that grease pit?

Then, Nadine's got a cross to bear.

I mean, taking care of that potato head.

I guess you heard about that shit
up in Abilene. Bank robbery?

It's all that's been on the box all day.

Killed some people, didn't they?

Yeah. Killed four Rangers,

three cops,

one civilian.

Took a lady bank teller hostage
with them.

Supposed to be headed for the border,
which would bring them right my way.

Get my hands on them crazy, sick
fucking bastards, it's payback time.

I mean...

Well, we'll get them.

- We'll get them.
- Well, I don't doubt it.

Well, I gotta drain my lizard.

Mind if I use your commode?

- Knock yourself out.
- Thank you.

You're welcome.

Do you think I'm fucking playing
with you, asshole?

Do you want this little girl to die,
or that little girl or yourself?

Or your bosom buddy with the badge?
Now, I don't want to do it,

but I will turn this place
into the fucking Wild Bunch

if I think that you are fucking with me.

What do you want from me?
I did what you said.

You let him use the bathroom.
No store does that.

He comes in here every day,
and we bullshit.

He's used my toilet a thousand times.

If I told him "no,"
he'd know something was up.

All right. I want him out of here,
in his car, and down the road,

or you can change the name of this
place to "Benny's World of Blood."

Were you giving that pig signals?

Are you kidding? I didn't do anything!

- He says you were scratching.
- I wasn't scratching!

- Are you calling him a liar?
- I'm not calling him a liar, okay?

I'm simply saying if I was scratching,

I don't remember scratching.
And if I did scratch,

it's not because
I was signalling the cop,

it's 'cause I'm fucking scared shitless!

Wait a minute.
The guy's in the bathroom.

Why don't I just go back there,
shoot him in the back of the head,

and we can get the hell out of here?

Don't do that! Look, you asked me
to act natural, and I'm acting natural.

In fact, under the circumstances,
I think I ought to get

a fucking Academy Award
for how natural I'm acting.

You asked me to get rid of him.
I'm doing my best!

Well, your best better get
a hell of a lot fucking better,

or you are gonna feel
a hell of a lot fucking worse.

Everybody be cool. You be cool.

Yeah, be back at it tomorrow.

Tonight I'm gonna
sit in front of that box

and get higher than a Georgia pine.

How much you want
for that hooch, Pete?

Oh, $6.50.

Jesus Christ.
You bucking for early retirement?

Shit, yeah.

Hey! Hey! What the fuck is that about?

- He signalled the Ranger.
- I didn't!

You gotta believe me! I didn't!

When they were talking,
he mouthed the words, "Help us."

- You fucking liar! I didn't say shit!
- Would you shut the hell up?

Hey! Will you stop it?

What the fuck is your problem,
goddamn it?

Seth, he did it!

You were by the beer cooler
with your back turned.

I was by the magazines.
I could see his face,

and I saw him mouth the words,
"Help us."

Start the car.

- You believe me, don't you?
- Yes, shut up

and start the car, all right?
You start the car.

- You believe me, don't you?
- Start the car. You know that?

Shut the fuck up and start the car.

- Wait, wait.
- I believe you. Start the car!

You're not just saying that.
You do believe me?

- I believe you! Let's go!
- That means you believe me.

- Yes, I believe you!
- You should, 'cause I'm right.

- Oh, shit!
- No!

- Richie?
- Yeah?

You okay?

He shot me in the fucking hand!

- Like I told you, he said, "Help us."
- I never said, "Help us"!

Well, that doesn't matter now,

'cause you got about
two fucking seconds to live!

- Richie?
- Yeah?

When I count to three, you shoot
the bottles out from behind him.

Oh, yeah!

- One.
- You fuck!

Two.

Three.

What did I tell you?
What did I say to you?

I said, "Buy the road map and leave."

What the fuck
am I supposed to do, Seth?

- He recognised us.
- He didn't recognise shit.

Seth, I'm telling you,
the way he looked at us,

you, especially, I knew he knew.

Low profile. Do you understand
the meaning of the words "low profile"?

"Hey, Richie, how's your hand?"
"It hurts like a fucking son of a bitch!"

Let me tell you what "low profile" is not.

"Thanks for asking."

It is not taking girls hostage.

It is not shooting police.
It is not setting fire to a building.

Bitch, bitch, bitch.

Hold it!

Goddamn you. Goddamn you.

What the hell do you want?

What do you think I want,
you mean old bastard?

I want a fucking room.

Okay. All right.

- Do they have cable?
- No.

- Do they have the X-rated channel?
- No.

- Do they have a waterbed?
- Nope.

- What do they got?
- They have four walls and a roof,

and that's all we need.

All right, pop the trunk.
Let's do this fast.

Don't say a word.

You, plant yourself in that seat.

- What are you gonna do with me?
- I said, "Plant yourself."

Plants don't talk.
Now, you wanna get on my good side,

you sit still and you don't make a peep.

- All right, how does this feel?
- How do you think?

It hurts like a son of a bitch.

All right. It's wrapped too tight.
Nice and easy now.

- Okay.
- All right.

Okay, I'm gonna go get the money.

It's 6:00. What time does it get dark
around here?

- About 8:00.
- Good.

I'm going to the border,
check things out.

I'm gonna call Carlos, try and arrange

some sort of a rendezvous.
I don't know what yet.

Could you see if he could arrange
a better deal than 30%?

It's their standard deal.
They're not gonna change that for us.

Did you even try to negotiate
with them?

Richie, these guys are not spic
firecracker salesmen from Tijuana.

They don't even know the meaning
of the word "barter."

You wanna stay in El Rey,
you give them 30% of your loot.

It's scripture.
So it is written, so shall it be done.

- Look".
- Yeah, I know, listen.

Hey, you want sanctuary,
you gotta pay the price.

The price is 30%.

- All I'm saying, man...
- This conversation's over.

Okay?

We need to have a talk.

- What's your name?
- Gloria.

Hello, Gloria. I'm Seth.
That's my brother, Richie.

Let's cut to the chase.
I'm gonna ask you one question,

and all I want is a yes or no answer.

Do you wanna live through this?

- Yes.
- Good. Rule number one, no noise.

No questions. If you make a noise,

Mr .44 makes a noise.

If you ask a question,
Mr .44 answers it.

Now, are you absolutely,
positively clear about rule number one?

- Yes.
- Rule number two.

You do what we say, when we say it.
If you don't, see rule number one.

Rule number three, don't you ever
try and fucking run on us.

'Cause I got six little friends,

and they can all run
faster than you can.

Open your eyes.

Gloria, you hang in there,
you follow the rules,

and you don't fuck with us,
and you'll get out of this alive.

I give you my word. Okay?

I'll be back in a minute.

You wanna come over on the bed
and watch TV with me?

Hail!

Come on.

Have a seat.

Come on.

Take off your shoes.

We got about two more hours

till we get in to El Paso,

which is right next to the border.

- Then we'll stop at a motel.
- Stop?

We're not actually gonna stop
at a motel, are we?

Yeah, what for?
We have a motor home.

We don't wanna stay in those
roach haven motels, do we?

- We're self-contained.
- We're self-contained.

Okay, okay.

Maybe I was a little overzealous,
but give me a break. I just bought it.

How come you wanna stop anyways,
Dad?

- I'm exhausted.
- Exhausted? Just lie in the back, Dad.

- I can drive us into Mexico.
- I just bet you would.

Don't even think about it.
Besides, I wanna have

just one night's sleep
in an honest-to-goodness bed.

The beds in the home are okay,

but they're not like a real bed.

Excuse me. I have to use the restroom.

Oh! Guess what. When I called
the machine to check the messages,

one of them was from Bethel Baptist.

And Mr Franklin said that

he wouldn't permanently replace you
until we came back.

- And he said that...
- That's real nice of Ted,

but I'll call him tomorrow
and tell him not to bother waiting.

Daddy, I didn't wanna talk about this
in front of Scott

because he gets upset,
but I just wanna know.

Don't you believe in God any more?

Not enough to be a pastor.

Look, I know this is hard on you kids.

After Jenny's death,
this is probably the last thing you need,

but my congregation needs
spiritual leadership.

Well, my faith is gone.

To answer your question, yes,
I do believe in Jesus.

Yes, I do believe in God.

But do I love them?

No.

Well, it's just that all our lives
you've been a pastor,

and then one day you're just gonna
wake up and say, "Fuck him"?

I didn't say, "Fuck him."

Every person who chooses

the service of God as his life's work,

has something in common.

I don't care if you're a preacher,
a priest,

a nun, a rabbi or a Buddhist monk.

Many, many times during your life,
you'll look at your reflection

in the mirror and ask yourself,

"Am I a fool?"

I'm not going through a lapse.

What I've experienced
is closer to awakening.

But, Daddy,

what do you think Mom would say?

Mama's got nothing to say. She's dead.

This bloody crime spree started
just a week ago today.

The oldest of the two brothers,
Seth Gecko,

was serving time
in Rolling's Kansas State Penitentiary

for his part in
the 1988 Scott City bank robbery

in which two law enforcement officers
lost their lives.

It was while at the courthouse
that this man, his younger brother,

Richard Gecko, a known armed robber
and sex offender,

pulled off a daring daylight escape,

resulting in the death of four
Wichita law enforcement officers

and this woman, Heidi Vogel,
sixth grade teacher,

who was run over by the Geckos

during a high-speed pursuit
through downtown Wichita.

And, earlier today, during a daylight
liquor store robbery in Big Springs,

the Gecko brothers killed
another Texas Ranger, Earl McGraw,

and liquor store clerk, Pete Bottoms.

That changes the death toll to 16.

Five Texas Rangers,
eight police officers, three civilians,

and one hostage, bank teller
and mother of four, Gloria Hill.

For the time being,
we're very confident

that we'll apprehend these fugitives
within the next 48 hours.

The bureau, local law enforcement,
and the Texas Rangers have all joined

in forming a dragnet
to snare Seth and Richard Gecko.

Is it safe to assume that
because of the death count involved

and the loss of life
of law enforcement officers

that the bureau, the Rangers,
and the police force

are taking this manhunt personally?

I would say
that's a very safe assumption.

Shit, I was really worried.
Where the fuck you been, man?

- Sightseeing.
- What'd you see?

- Cops.
- Did you see the border?

Yes, I saw the border.
What'd the TV say?

They're gonna apprehend us
in about 48 hours.

I gotta figure out a way to get us
across this goddamn border.

The longer we stay here,
our lives ain't worth shit. Here you go.

We gotta get our asses
into Mexico tonight,

then Carlos is gonna meet us there
at the rendezvous tomorrow morning.

Well, now, he and his boys,
both of them, all of them,

are gonna escort us into El Rey and...

- Where's the woman?
- What?

What do you mean, "What"?
The woman, the...

The fucking hostage.

Richard, where is she?

- She's in there.
- What the fuck is she doing in there?

Now, Seth, wait a minute. Seth.

Richard, what's wrong with you?

Before you flip out, okay, let me just
explain what happened, all right?

Yeah, explain it to me.

I need an explanation.
What is the matter with you?

There's nothing wrong
with me, brother.

That woman tried to escape,
and I did what I had to do.

No. No, that woman wouldn't have
said shit if she had a mouth full of it.

- Wrong, wrong, wrong.
- Yeah.

After you left, she became
a completely different person.

Yeah.

Is it me? My fault?

- It's not your fault.
- Is this my fault?

No, it's her fault.

- Is this my fault?
- It's not your fault.

Do you think that this is what I am?

- I don't...
- This is not me.

I am a professional fucking thief.

I don't kill people that I don't have to,
and I don't fucking rape women.

What you are doing,
what you are fucking doing...

What you are doing is not how
it's done. Do you understand that?

Do you? Just say fucking "yes."

- Say, "Yes, Seth, I understand."
- Yes, Seth, I understand.

Say, "Yes, Seth, I fucking understand."

I understand, Seth.
I fucking understand.

We'll get to Mexico,
and it's gonna be sweet rosemary,

and 100 proof liquor,

and rice and beans,
and none of this shit's gonna matter.

I can't believe he's stopping here.
This place is totally cruddy.

Dad, why are we stopping here?

There's nothing wrong with this place.

It's a flophouse.

It's not a flophouse.

It's basic and simple.

That doesn't make it a flophouse.

All right. Well, if it doesn't have a pool,
then we're going some place else.

It has a bed.

That's all I care about.

Well, other places have beds, too,

and they also have a gym, tennis...

Jeez, what is this guy's problem?

No idea.

Creepy guy.

- What?
- Yes,

I'm your neighbour from room 11,

and I hate to disturb you,
but I'd like to ask a favour.

I hope none of this is disturbing you.

Hi. I'm from room 11,

and me and my lady friend
need some ice,

and we don't seem to have
an ice bucket.

If it's not too much trouble,
could I possibly borrow yours?

I'll bring it right back.

- Sure.
- Thank you.

What is this?

It's called a punch.

Lose the guitar.

- What's your name?
- Jacob.

Jacob, get up, get on the bed.

If you make a wrong move,
I will shoot you in the face.

Open your mouth. Wide.

Let's go. Let's move the Jap
over here, too. Let's go.

So what's the story with you two?
You a couple of fags?

- He's my son.
- How does that happen?

- You don't look Japanese.
- Neither does he. He looks Chinese.

Oh! Oh, well, excuse me all to hell.

What's this about? Money?

It's about money, all right,
but not yours.

My brother and I, we're in a little
hot water. Now I need your assistance.

Stop!

What's going on?

We're having a bikini contest,
and you just won.

It's okay, honey.
Everything's gonna be all right.

You listen to your daddy, sugar,
and you don't do anything stupid.

You two, Simon says sit the fuck down.

Sit down.

Now, where are the keys
to the motor home?

- On the dresser.
- Good.

All right. Richie, you take these keys.

You start this big bastard up
and drive it up front.

Richie, would you do me a favour
and eat my pussy for me? Please?

- Uh, sure.
- Richie, hey!

Not when you get around to it. Now.

You, Gidget, go in the bathroom,
put on some clothes.

You got three minutes. One second
longer, I shoot your father in the face.

- Do you understand what I just said?
- Yes.

- Do you believe me?
- Yes.

You damn well better. Go.

Look, if you want the motor home,
just take it and get out.

It's not gonna be that easy, Pops.

We're gonna go on a little ride.

Not a chance.

- Come again?
- If you're taking people, take me,

but my kids aren't going anywhere
with you.

Sorry, Pops. I need everybody.

My children are not going with you,
and that's that.

That's not fucking that.
This is fucking this.

Dad.

You sit down. Sit down.

You, go sit over there.
Go sit over there now. Move it.

Sit down.

Now, I don't have time to fuck around,
so I'm gonna make this simple.

You take your kids
and you get in that motor home,

or I will execute all three of you
right now.

So, what's it gonna be?

Yes or no answer.

- Yes.
- Hey, your old man's all right.

He just saved your life.

Time's up, princess. Here we go.

Okay, ramblers, let's get rambling.

Excuse me.

What?

Where are you taking us?

- Mexico.
- What's in Mexico?

Mexicans.

- Richie?
- Yeah?

Put in your bit.

I grind my teeth.

Dengue woman

- What are their names?
- Scott and Kate.

Scott and Kate. Who's this?

- My wife.
- Where is the little lady?

In heaven.

She dead?

- Yes, she is.
- How'd she die?

Auto wreck.

Come on, Jacob, give me
some more details. How did it happen?

Some fucking drunk kill her?

No. It was a rainy night.

The brakes on the car weren't great.

She had to stop suddenly.

She slid on the road.
She crashed. She died.

- She died right away?
- Not quite.

She was trapped in the wreck for about

six hours before she passed on.

Yeah, those acts of God really
stick it in and break it off, don't they?

Yes, they do.

Is that real?

Yes.

I've seen one of these things before.
A friend of mine had himself ordained,

a minister of his own religion.

Some way to fuck the IRS.

Is that what you're doing,
or are you the real McCoy?

Real McCoy.

You're a preacher?

I was a minister.

"Was," as in not any more?

- Yes.
- Why'd you quit?

I think I've gotten about
as up close and personal

with you as I'm gonna get.

Let's just keep this friendly, okay,
Pops? Let's not get too sensitive.

You're right.

Enough with the getting
to know you shit. All right.

I don't give a rat's ass
about you or your fucking family.

You can all live forever,
or you can die this second,

and I don't give a shit which.

The only things that I care about
are me,

that son of a bitch back there
in the back, and our money.

So you help us get across the border
without incident,

you stay with us through the night
without trying anything funny,

without trying to escape,

and, in the morning,
I'm gonna let you guys go, all of you.

How do I know you'll keep your word?

You have to convince me
you're telling the truth.

Look, dickhead, the only thing
that you have to be convinced about

is the fact that you are stuck
in a situation

with a couple of
real mean motor scooters,

and I don't want to have to worry
about you all fucking night.

You know, and I don't think you want
to be worrying

about my brother's intentions
towards your daughter all night either.

Did you notice the way that
he was looking at her?

- Yes.
- You didn't like it, did you?

- No, I didn't.
- I didn't think so.

You get us into Mexico,

and you don't try to escape,
and your daughter will be safe.

And in the morning, I will let you go.
I give you my word, Jacob.

If he touches her, I'll kill him.

Fair enough.
You break your word, I'll kill all of you.

You got me all crazy

I can't get out of bed

Bones are aching

Backed up in my head

Dengue woman

Stay away from me

You got your aches and pains

All over me

Did you mean what you said
back there in the room?

What?

In the room.

Did you mean
what you said back there,

or were you just fooling around?

Because if you really want me to
do that for you, I will.

I'd be happy to.

Do what?

What you said back there in the room.

What did I say?

- You asked me if I would eat out...
- Richie.

What?

I told you to watch those kids,
not to talk to them.

You don't have nothing to say
to one another,

so let's just cut the chatter.

We'll talk later, okay?

- Just stand back there.
- Move it up. Move it up.

All right, everybody. It's show time.

Richie, you take Kate
into the bathroom.

Scott, get up here with your dad.
Let's go. Let's go!

Now, what are you gonna say?

I don't have the slightest idea.

Just keep thinking about that gun
next to Kate's head.

Get in.

Bring another one up. Come on.

Come on. Let's go.

- This isn't gonna work, Seth.
- Shut up. It's gonna work just fine.

Dad, what are you gonna do?

I'm gonna try and get us
across the border.

Dad, you have to tell them
that they're back there.

Have you forgotten about your sister?

I want to go on record right now
as saying that this is a very bad idea.

Duly noted. Now shut up.

Step right over there. That's okay.

They're gonna kill us, Dad.

They're gonna get us
across the border,

take us out in the desert somewhere,
then they're gonna fucking shoot us.

If they get over the border,
they're gonna let us go.

They won't. Dad, come on.
I watch those reality shows.

They never let anybody go.
Any cop will tell you,

in a situation like this,
you get a chance and you go for it.

I know it may not seem like it,

but I know exactly what I'm doing.

- You're gonna have to trust me on this.
- I can't do that, Dad.

If you don't tell the cops, I will.

Listen to me. You ain't gonna do
a goddamn thing, you hear me?

I'm running the show.
I make the decisions.

- He is running the show.
- I'm running the show!

- Dad!
- I'm running the show!

I make the plays.

You back the plays I make.

I need your cover.

Cover me.

How many with you?

Just my son and I.

What's your purpose in Mexico?

Vacation. I'm taking him to
see his first bullfight.

They're gonna search the van.

As long as you don't act like
a fucking nut, we're gonna be just fine.

What the hell's
that supposed to mean?

- What?
- You just called me a "fucking nut."

- No, I didn't.
- Yes, you did.

You said as long as I don't act like
a "fucking nut." Implying that

- I've been acting like a fucking nut.
- Take a pill, all right?

I just meant be cool.

Yeah, you meant that,
but you meant the other, too.

This is not the time, Richie.

Hey, fuck those spic pigs, man!

- You called me a "fucking nut."
- Would you just...

Now, where I come from,
that stops the train in its tracks.

Keep your fucking voice down.

Or what?

What was that?

Oh...

That was just my daughter
in the bathroom.

I thought you said
it was just you and your son.

I meant
me and my son and my daughter.

Open up. I'm coming aboard.

What was the nuttiest thing I did, Seth?
I'm curious. Tell me. What?

- What was it?
- This is not the time, Richie.

I know. Was it possibly when your ass
was rotting in jail and I broke it out?

- Right.
- Was that the nuttiest thing?

That was nutty, not to mention stupid.

Thanks.

- I'm in the bathroom.
- Open up. It's the Border Patrol.

It's open.

Do you mind?
Shut the fucking door, please.

Excuse me.

Goddamn, that was intense!

Oh, baby, we did it. We're in Mexico.

We're fucking in Mexico,
you little piece of fucking shit!

Come on! Kate, get out here. Come on.

All right, listen up. Everybody listen.

Now, I know that
I've put you all through hell,

and I know that I have been
one rough pecker.

But from here on out,
you guys are all in my cool book.

Now, Scotty,
I want you to help me with Richie.

We're gonna lay him down
on the couch over there.

Jacob, you're gonna keep driving
down this street

until you come to another street
called De Gallo.

When you get to De Gallo,
you're gonna turn this big bastard left

and you're gonna go down
a couple of miles

until you see a bar
called the Titty Twister.

From what I understand,
you cannot miss it.

- Then?
- And then you stop

because that's where we're going.

Listen. Don't make a career out of this,
okay? Come on. Hey.

Hey. You okay?

Yeah, I think so. What happened?

- I don't know. You just passed out.
- I did?

You said something
about your hand hurting

and then you just hit the ground
like a sack of potatoes.

- Really?
- Head hit the toilet.

You scared the shit out of me.
You sure you're okay, there?

Yeah, I think so.
I'm just a little fucked up.

Well, let me tell you something
that's gonna clear your head right up.

- What?
- We are officially Mexicans.

- We're in Mexico, buddy.
- We are?

Yeah, we're heading down
to the rendezvous right now.

We're gonna pound booze,
wait for Carlos.

When he gets there,
he's gonna take us down to El Rey.

And then you and I, my brother,
we're gonna kick fucking back.

How do you like them apples?

Far out.

- Where's my glasses?
- Oh, yeah, they...

They broke when you fell.

Fuck, Seth!
These are, like, my only pair.

Don't worry about it.
We'll get you another pair.

What do you mean,
"Don't worry about it"?

Of course I'm gonna worry about it.
I can't fucking see!

I'll take care of it
when we get to El Rey.

Yeah, like some Mexican
hole in the wall

is gonna have my fucking prescription.

It's not a big deal
until you make it a big deal, Richie.

Now, I was in a very good mood,

so stop bringing me down
with this bullshit!

I can't wear this shit.

Hey, guys. We're here.

All right. Pussy, pussy, pussy!

Come on in, pussy lovers!

Here at the Titty Twister,
we're slashing pussy in half.

Give us an offer on our best selection
of pussy. This is a pussy blowout!

All right, we got white pussy, black
pussy, Spanish pussy, yellow pussy.

We got hot pussy, cold pussy.

We got wet pussy.
We got smelly pussy.

We got hairy pussy, bloody pussy.
We got snapping pussy.

We got silk pussy, velvet pussy,
Naugahyde pussy.

We even got horse pussy, dog pussy,
chicken pussy.

Come on. You want pussy?
Come on in, pussy lovers.

If we don't got it, you don't want it.
Come on in, pussy lovers.

Come on!

Okay, troops, it's the homestretch.

Here's the deal.
This place closes at dawn.

Carlos is gonna meet us here
sometime before dawn.

Now, we are gonna go in there.
We're gonna take a seat.

We're gonna have a drink.
We're gonna have a bunch of drinks.

And we're gonna wait for Carlos.
Let me say something.

I'm very happy about where we're at.
We got a real nice

"I don't fuck with you, you don't
fuck with me" attitude going on.

So if everybody just keeps playing it
cool, and I'm talking to you, too, Richie,

then everybody's gonna get
what they want.

Okay, hard drinkers, let's drink hard.
I'm buying. Come on.

Here we go.

Out of the stew pot and into the fire.

Attention, pussy shoppers!

Take advantage
of our penny pussy sale.

If you buy one piece of pussy
at the regular price,

you'll get another piece of pussy of
equal or lesser value for only a penny.

Try and beat pussy for a penny!

If you can find cheaper pussy
anywhere, fuck it!

Hey, what do we have
approaching here?

A new flavour, apple pie pussy.

- Hey, not so fast, slick.
- Step aside, asshole.

Now, is my shit together
or is my shit together?

Here we go.

Hi. How you doing? Enjoying it?
I hope so.

Now,

this is my kind of place.

I could become a regular.

Whisky.

- You can't come in here.
- What do you mean?

It's a private bar. You're not welcome.

Are you telling me that
I'm not good enough to drink here?

This bar is for bikers and truckers only.

You, get out!

- Take your hand off of me.
- I'm gonna count to three.

No, I'm gonna count to three.

- One.
- Two.

Now, wait a minute.
There is no reason to get ugly.

There is just a misunderstanding
going on here.

You said this bar is for
truckers and bikers.

Well, I'm a truck driver.

If you look outside your door
in your parking lot,

you'll see a big recreational vehicle.

That's mine.
In order to drive that legally,

you need a Class Two driver's licence.

This bar is for truck drivers?

I am a truck driver,
and these are my friends.

Welcome to the Titty Twister.

Bottle of whisky and five glasses.

Coming right out.

- They serve food here, Jose?
- The best in Mexico.

I kind of doubt that.

We're gonna go over here. You send
a waitress over to take our order, okay?

Yeah!

Mary had a little lamb

His fleece was black as coal, yeah

Any time you want a lap dance with
that girl, kid, just let me know, all right?

It's on me.

He followed her to school one day

Pass.

- Is it against your religion?
- No, I do drink.

I'm just not drinking now.

Fair enough. More for me.
Scott, how about you?

- No.
- Kate, how about you?

No, I can't. I'm not 21 yet.

That means, "Yes." Post time, Kate!

Here we go. You slam it down.

You knock the glass down
on the table, all right?

One, two, three!

Attagirl, Kate.

Scotty, you ready? Here we go.
You ready for one?

- Okay.
- No, you won't.

Yes, he will. Yes, he will,
because I'm not drinking by myself.

Kate, round two.
You ready? Here we go.

Yes, I'll have another one. Thank you.

On three. One, two, three.

Why are you so agitated?

I'm still stewing about that ape
laying his hand on me.

What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna sit here
and I'm gonna finish this bottle.

And when I am finished,
I'm gonna take this bottle

and I'm gonna bust it
over his melon fucking head.

Before we stepped in here,
you told all of us to be cool.

- So that means you, too.
- I never said do what I do.

I said do what I say.

On my way I passed it

Express yourself

Are you such a fucking loser
you can't tell when you've won?

- What'd you call me?
- Nothing.

I didn't make a statement.
I asked a question.

Would you like me to ask it again?

Are you such a loser
you can't tell when you've won?

The entire state of Texas,
along with the FBI,

are looking for you.

Did they find you?

No, they couldn't.

You've won, Seth.

Enjoy it.

Jacob,

I want you to have a drink with me.

I insist.

To your family.

To yours.

And now, for your viewing pleasure,

the mistress of the macabre,

the epitome of evil,

the most sinister woman to ever dance
on the face of this Earth.

- Bite this!
- Lowly dog.

Bow your head.

Kneel and worship at the feet

of Santanico Pandemonium!

Show it!

Check it out!

Watching her

strolling in the night

So white

Wondering why

it's only after dark

In her eyes

the distant firelight

burns bright

Wondering why

it's only after dark

Find myself in her room

Feel the fever of my doom

Falling, falling through the floor

I'm knocking on the devil's door, yeah

Burning, burning

in the flame

Now that I know her secret name

You can tear her temple down

But she 'll be back and rule again, yeah

That's what I call a fucking show!

Come here!

- That guy. It's the puta over there.
- Richie, get back on the clock.

- How many?
- Three.

Which one?

This piece of shit here, man,

broke my finger and my nose!

And this faggot kicked me in the ribs
while I was down.

- Up!
- Fuck off, bogeyman!

Fuck!

All right, everybody be cool,
or you'll be just as dead as these fucks!

How's your hand? Let me see it.

Shit.

Do you think that was funny?

Sit down!

- Richie, look out!
- Motherfucking shit!

- Get the fuck off!
- Hey! Hey!

- Get her off me!
- Hey! Hey!

What the fuck are you doing?
Shoot her!

I'm coming, buddy!

- Richie. Richie.
- Fucking bitch.

Richie.

Fucking bitch.

Richie.

Hey. Hey.

Hey.

What the fuck?

Dinner is served.

Come on! Come on, you! Jacob!

No, no, no! Look out! Look out!

You know what everybody
says about me, huh?

I suck!

Let's see if you taste
as good as your brother.

Fuck you.

Hey, hey, hey!

Oh, shit.

Give me that!

I'm not gonna drain you completely.

You'll be my slave.

Because I don't think you're worthy
of human blood,

you'll feed on the blood of stray dogs.

You'll be my footstool,
and at my command,

you'll lick the dog shit
from my boot heel.

Since you'll be my dog,

your new name will be Spot.

Welcome to slavery.

No, thanks. I already had a wife.

We might be in trouble.

Yo, monkey man.

Anything you got to say to them,

you can say to me first.

That's enough.

Aren't they supposed to
burn up or something?

Fuck.

Now let's kill that fucking band.

I can do that.

Fuck you, everybody! Good night!

Fuckers.

Hey, buddy.

I'm sorry I fucked things up, Richie.

You would've liked it in El Rey.
You would've...

You would've found peace there.

I love you, buddy.

I love you, too, Seth.

You touch my brother
with that stake, biker,

and vampires aren't gonna have to
suck your blood.

They'll be able to lick it up off the floor.

- He's not your brother any more.
- That's a matter of opinion,

and I don't give a fuck about yours.

Don't be a fool! He'll kill us all.

- Shut up!
- Shut up!

Let's go. Move. Move. Move.

Hold him down.

Richie,

here is the peace in death
that I could not give you in life.

Fuck.

Seth, are you okay?

I'm peachy, Kate.
The world is my oyster.

Except for the fact that I just...

I just rammed a wooden stake
into my brother's chest

because he turned into a vampire,

even though I don't believe
in vampires.

Aside from that unfortunate business,

everything is hunky-dory.

- I'm really, really sorry.
- Bullshit! Bullshit!

If it were up to you,
if you had half a chance,

you would feed us to those fucks.

Then, why didn't I?

I'm sorry you lost your brother.
I'm sorry he's dead.

I'm sorry everybody's dead.

But if we're gonna get out of this,
we need you clean

and sober and thinking, not drunk.

- What is that?
- Don't know.

First I thought it was just birds.

It's bats.

Give me a hand.

- Hey!
- Let me go!

Whoa.

You're dead!

Come on!

We'll take care of this mess.
Go stake the rest of those ugly fucks.

Way ahead of you.

Watch your step.

- What's your name, girlie?
- Kate. What's yours?

Sex Machine.
Pleased to meet you, Kate.

Me, too.

Okay.

Is everybody okay?

Yeah, I'm okay.

Does anybody know
what's going on here?

I know what's going on.

We got a bunch of fucking vampires
out there trying to get in here

and suck our fucking blood.

And that's it. Plain and simple.

And I don't wanna hear anything about
"I don't believe in vampires,"

because I don't fucking believe
in vampires,

but I believe in my own two eyes,
and what I saw is fucking vampires.

Now, do we all agree that
what we are dealing with is vampires?

- Yes.
- You, too, Preacher?

I don't believe in vampires,
but I believe in what I saw.

Good for you.

All right, now that we all agree
that we're dealing with vampires,

what do we know about vampires?

Crosses hurt vampires.
Do we have a cross?

- In the motor home.
- In other words, no.

Wait a second.
I mean, just look around.

We got crosses all over the place.

All you gotta do is put two sticks
together and you got a cross.

Yeah, he's right.
Peter Cushing does that all the time.

Okay, I'll buy that.
So we got crosses covered. What else?

Wooden stakes in the heart
been working pretty good so far.

And garlic, sunlight, holy water.

I'm not sure, doesn't silver
have something to do with vampires?

- That's werewolves.
- I know silver bullets are werewolves,

but I'm sure silver has something to do
with vampires.

Well, does anybody have any silver?

Okay. Then, who cares?

Has anybody here read a real book
about vampires,

or are we just remembering
what some movie said?

- I mean, a real book.
- You mean, like a Time Life book?

I take it the answer's no.

Okay, then, what do we know
about these vampires?

Well, we know they got superhuman
strength, but we can hurt them.

- Yeah.
- Another thing, though.

If you're gonna drive a chair leg
through a human,

you'd better be
one strong son of a bitch.

I mean, the human body is one rough,
tough machine.

But these vamps, these vamps,
they're... They have soft bodies.

The texture of their skin is softer.

They're mushier.
You can push it right through them.

You see, if you hit one hard enough,
take their head right off.

Actually, our best weapon
against these satanic cocksuckers

is this man.

He's a preacher.

As far as God's concerned,
we might as well all be a piece of shit,

but he is one of the boys.

Only one problem.
His faith isn't what it used to be.

I've had enough of your taunts.

I'm not taunting you, Jacob.
We need you.

A faithless preacher
doesn't mean shit to us.

A servant of God can take a cross
and shove it up these monsters' asses.

A servant of God can bless
the tap water and make it a weapon.

Jacob, I know why you lost your faith.

How could holiness exist

if your wife can be taken away
from you and the children?

I've always said
that God can kiss my ass,

but I just changed my lifetime tune
about 30 minutes ago.

'Cause I know that
whatever is out there trying to get in

is pure evil straight from hell.

And if there is a hell
and those sons of bitches are from it,

then there has got to be
a heaven, Jacob. There's gotta be.

So, which are you?

Are you a faithless preacher, or are you
a mean motherfucking servant of God?

I'm a mean...

...servant of God.

I don't know if I can take much more
of that noise.

Sure you can.

You can take it
because you got no choice.

How'd you like to spend 24 hours of it
lying in some muddy ditch

with nothing but the rotten corpses
of your friends to keep you company?

What are you talking about?

I was in Nam back in '72.

I was trapped behind enemy lines
with my entire squad dead.

They thought they had killed everyone.

Except for me, they was right.

But it wasn't for their lack of trying.

A grenade blew up right beside me.

That's why I'm so pretty.

And they started pushing
all them bodies in on top of me.

All I could do was lay there,
play possum.

Listen to the enemy joke, laugh.

Hour after hour after hour, I lay.

- Kill them.
- Kill them.

- Kill them.
- Kill them all.

Sex Machine.

- Kill them.
- Kill them.

Kill them!

So I finally climbed out of this hole,

and I sneaked up on the enemy
while he was sleeping,

and I killed one, two, three, four, five...

When I came to my senses,

I realised I'd killed
an entire VC squad single-handed.

There was blood

and chunks of yellow flesh
clinging to my bayonet.

To this day, I don't remember...

Get it off of me! Get it off of me!
Please! Get it off!

No!

Dad!

Fucking bit me. Fucking bit me!

What are you gonna do about it?

Come on, Sex Machine!

Oh, shit!

Get up. Get up! Up! Come on!

Go! Come on!

Wait. We have to go back
for my father.

Your dad's dead, Kate.

He is the light.

The people who walk

in the darkness

have seen the light!

Open the door!

Open the door!

- Go!
- Daddy!

Jacob, are you bit?

Yeah.

Motherfuck. Motherfucking vampires!

I'm gonna kill every last one
of you godless fucking pieces of shit!

You bet you are,
and I'm gonna help you do it.

But we ain't got much time.

- You're gonna be okay, aren't you?
- No, I'm not.

I've been bit. In fact, I'm already dead.

Now, I'd say in the next 20
or 30 minutes,

our friends outside
will bust in this door,

and I'll probably turn into a vampire
within the hour.

Now, you have two choices.

You can wait for me to turn,
then deal with me,

or we can kick open that door,

and the four of us can go at them,
hit them with everything we have.

But if we're gonna go at them,
we gotta go at them now.

What's this stuff?

My guess is this little dive
has been feeding on bikers

and truckers for a long time.

This is probably the shipments
that they stole off the trucks.

Well, I say let's tear this place apart
for weapons,

so when they burst through the door,

we'll make them wish they never did.

I don't care about
living or dying any more.

I just want to send as many of these
devils back to hell as I can.

Amen.

Loving God, bless this water and give
us your protection and strength

-in this, our darkest hour. Amen.
- Amen.

Before we go any further, I need
you three to promise me something.

I'll fight with you to the bitter end,
but when I turn into one of them,

I won't be Jacob any more.

I'll be a lapdog of Satan.

I want you three to promise
you'll take me down,

no different from the rest.

I promise, Jacob.

Kate? Scott?

I promise.

Scott.

Yeah, I promise.

Why don't I believe you?

I'm gonna ask you two again.

Then, I want you to swear to God
that you'll kill me!

If you don't,
I'm gonna just kill myself right now.

Now, since you need me,
I think you'd better swear!

Kate, do you swear to God

that when I become one of the undead
you'll kill me?

Kate! We don't have much time,

so I'm only giving you
to the count of five.

One, two, three, four...

Okay! All right! I promise I'll do it!

Good girl.
Now, Scott, we have even less time,

so I'm giving you to the count of three.

- One.
- You don't believe in suicide.

It's not suicide if you're already dead.
Two!

Okay! Okay.

I'll kill you when you change.
I swear to God in Jesus Christ's name.

- Thank you, son.
- Okay, vampire killers,

let's kill some fucking vampires.

Come out of darkness
and see the light.

From the darkness to light.

Come out of darkness.

Come out of darkness
and see the light.

Kill them all!

Come on! Come on!

Dad?

Dad, not... Dad! Dad! Dad!

I swear to God in Jesus Christ's name.

Oh, my God!

Fight now, cry later!

Get the fuck off! No!
Get off! Get off! Get off!

Kill me, Kate.

Just kill me, Kate.

I can't.

How many bullets do you have?

I don't know. Not many.

When you run out,
start cold-cocking them.

Make them sing for their supper.

Seth, should I save the last bullets
for us?

No. Use it on the next fuck
that tries to bite you.

Shoot more holes. Shoot more holes!

- Perfect.
- Oh, they can't go into the light.

Perfect.

All right, go.

Hey, Seth, don't leave me.

Hey! Come on, then. Come on.
Come here. Come on!

Come on, you! Come on!
Come here, you fucks!

Hello! I'm looking for my friend Seth!

Carlos! Kick in the door!

Go!

Son of a bitch.

What the fuck was going on in there?

What's the matter with you?
Are you crazy?

Why, out of all the godforsaken
shitholes in Mexico,

do we have to meet here?

One place is just as good as another.

You never been here before?

No. I drove by it a couple times.

It's a rowdy place.

It's out in the middle of nowhere.
There'll be no cops.

And it's open from dusk till dawn.

And, hey, didn't you say you wanted to
meet in the morning? Here we are.

Well, since you just picked this place
out of a hat, my brother is dead.

That girl's entire fucking family is dead.

- What were they, psychos, or...
- They look like psychos?

Is that what they looked like?
They were vampires.

Psychos do not explode
when sunlight hits them.

I don't give a fuck how crazy they are.

Seth, how can I make it up to you?

You can't make it up to me, Carlos.
I tell you, you can't do it.

Can't make it up.

15% instead of 30%
for my stay in El Rey.

That's a good start.

- Twenty-eight.
- My brother's gone.

You understand that?
He's gone, and he's not coming back,

and that is your fault.

Twenty.

- Twenty-five.
- Twenty-five.

Kate, go to the RV, get the suitcase.

You look like hell.

You want a cold beer?
I got some in the car.

Come on. They're cold.

I got Mexican and domestic.

- So, how do you like the car?
- It's all right.

I said, "Like new." This is a '90.

Hey, it is new, cabron. Belonged to
a drug dealer friend of mine.

Hey, he only drove it, like,
14 times in five years.

It's like new, I swear to God.

- So, what do I do, follow you?
- Yeah. Follow me.

All right, let's do it.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, I'm sorry, too.

- I'll see you.
- Seth.

You need some company?

Kate, do you know where I'm going?
Do you know what El Rey is?

- Hey, Seth.

It's time to go.

Go home, Kate.

I may be a bastard,
but I'm not a fucking bastard.

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