All language subtitles for The Nude Restaurant (1967) Andy Warhol
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1
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Fashion model.
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Until they told me that I always looked
like I'd just gotten out of bed.
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00:00:14,970 --> 00:00:19,270
Of course, I always did look like I'd
just gotten out of bed because I had
4
00:00:19,270 --> 00:00:20,450
gotten out of bed.
5
00:00:22,410 --> 00:00:27,550
Plus the fact that they said I didn't
have chic hair, whatever that means.
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00:00:28,130 --> 00:00:33,650
So I went to their special beauty salon
to get my hair straightened.
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00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:39,520
In a half an hour, I had two bald spots,
one here and one here, no hair at all,
8
00:00:39,580 --> 00:00:44,480
stubble. When I ran my head across the
top of my scalp, it felt like burned
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00:00:44,480 --> 00:00:45,480
grass.
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00:00:45,860 --> 00:00:50,500
You know, the scorched earth policy in
Vietnam?
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00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:52,920
Well, that was my head, scorched earth
policy.
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00:00:54,190 --> 00:00:56,910
So I went back and said, my dear Mr.
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00:00:57,150 --> 00:01:02,390
Caruso, you will have to give me a wig.
I simply can't work with a scorched
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00:01:02,390 --> 00:01:03,209
earth head.
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00:01:03,210 --> 00:01:06,770
And he said, oh, making trouble again.
All you models, all you do is make
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00:01:06,770 --> 00:01:09,610
trouble, trouble. So I said, well, I
guess I'll have to sue you.
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00:01:09,970 --> 00:01:11,390
So I sued him.
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00:01:12,270 --> 00:01:16,330
That was many years ago, and it still
hasn't come to court due to the fact
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I was arrested for contempt of court.
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That's when I was jaywalking.
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00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:27,260
And I had about five tickets, adding up
to about $100, and they finally kept
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coming to get me, so I went.
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And I was standing there in line, and
all these other people were getting in
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00:01:33,340 --> 00:01:35,360
line ahead of me, plunking their money
down.
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And this young lawyer came up and said,
that's the assistant DA.
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That's why he can get his money down
first.
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just because you don't have any
influence in the courts, they won't let
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00:01:49,630 --> 00:01:52,690
your money down. I mean, can you imagine
not taking your money?
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00:01:53,190 --> 00:01:57,710
This is after sending me to ten
different rooms on three different days
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I was going to the wrong room, wrong
time. So, finally, I raised a complete
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ruckus in the court, and I said, Your
Honor, as he sat there with the American
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00:02:07,030 --> 00:02:12,130
flag behind him, bigger than life, there
you sit with the American flag, bigger
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than life.
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Well, you're taking bribes from the
assistant district attorney. Now, just
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00:02:17,500 --> 00:02:21,220
because I don't happen to have any pull
in this part of the country, there's no
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reason why I shouldn't be able to get
out of here. My father is a lawyer, and
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00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:29,520
know all about that legal hypocrisy that
goes on. You should be ashamed. He
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said, young lady, stay right there.
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I'm sending two policemen, and I'm
putting you right in jail, contempt of
40
00:02:36,980 --> 00:02:41,280
And I looked there, and I saw these two
journalists. cells right down the hall
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00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:45,300
and I thought I really should go to jail
for the principle of the thing. But it
42
00:02:45,300 --> 00:02:46,820
looked so grimy.
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00:02:47,940 --> 00:02:51,860
I just couldn't face it. I thought, God,
how long will I rot in jail?
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00:02:52,620 --> 00:02:56,900
So another lawyer came up and said,
look, this is a very humane judge. Just
45
00:02:56,900 --> 00:02:59,500
apologize to him and everything will be
all right.
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00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:05,520
So I sat down and started to giggle and
I couldn't stop giggling.
47
00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:08,920
I just sat and giggled and giggled and
giggled. Well, all these little, you
48
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know, petty thieves came and went,
murderers, adulterers, you know, cases
49
00:03:13,180 --> 00:03:13,978
and went.
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00:03:13,980 --> 00:03:18,480
Finally, and they had a cop on either
side of me, and I looked around and I
51
00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:22,220
the guns. So I pulled out my sketch pad
and I started drawing guns and holsters
52
00:03:22,220 --> 00:03:24,740
and belts and buckles and guns and
holsters.
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00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:28,820
And they loved the drawings, and I was
passing drawings out to them of guns and
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00:03:28,820 --> 00:03:29,820
holsters.
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00:03:36,110 --> 00:03:40,130
I was really crying by this time, but
when I stopped crying, I started
56
00:03:40,210 --> 00:03:43,990
It was a combination of laughing and
crying, and I said, Your Honor, and then
57
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I'd giggle. I said, You know, I'm really
terribly sorry. I really didn't mean to
58
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be rude to you. He said, All right, but
don't let it happen again.
59
00:03:51,710 --> 00:03:55,750
I'll let you go this time, but just
don't let it happen again. This is a
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00:03:55,750 --> 00:03:58,930
of justice, a court of law. We have to
have order in here.
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00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:03,460
So I went away, back to my modeling job.
Of course, I was jaywalking to try to
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00:04:03,460 --> 00:04:07,480
get there on time. They send you one
place at 9, one place at 9 .30, one
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00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:08,319
at 10 o 'clock.
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00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:13,580
So finally, I decided I just had enough
of it.
65
00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:18,880
And I went way up north to the St.
Lawrence River, and then they started
66
00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:23,000
me from the magazines. They kept calling
and saying, Oh, we think you're just
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divine. We'd like to do a lot.
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00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:26,360
We think you're divine.
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00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:27,960
We'd like you to work with Pam.
70
00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:29,480
We'd like you to work with Alva John.
71
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Come right down.
72
00:04:31,140 --> 00:04:33,280
So I came back down again.
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00:04:33,780 --> 00:04:38,020
And the photographer who was doing the
job, I had had a fight with before I
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00:04:38,020 --> 00:04:40,360
left. So he wasn't very happy to see me.
75
00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:46,040
And it was the third retake. And they
had already done Angela Lansbury.
76
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Who else was popular at the time?
77
00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:56,280
A Michelle Morgan, that's right. They
did it on her fur coat. Well, they did
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on me. Oh, God, did it look awful.
79
00:04:59,500 --> 00:05:03,580
As I walked into the studio, the
assistant editor was looking at the
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00:05:03,660 --> 00:05:10,560
and she said, can't we do something with
her nose right here? I mean, that won't
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do at all.
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I was eavesdropping.
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00:05:13,240 --> 00:05:16,800
She said, well, the nose doesn't look
too bad in this one. Not only did I not
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have chic hair, my dear, but I did not
even have a chic nose.
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Then she got into my neck.
86
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:24,400
That bull neck.
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00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:29,280
Can't we cut that down? Can't we do a
little retouching? I always thought I
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a not bad neck. I mean, I certainly
wouldn't call it a bull neck.
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So she got a hold of me later and said,
No, my dear.
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You know, if you're really serious about
this, I think that you should go to the
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museum, the Metropolitan Museum of Art,
and study paintings of women.
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From every age. And take all the
magazines and study everything. Learn
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Learn makeup. Learn style.
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I mean it with a hope.
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If Cleopatra's nose was an inch shorter,
it would have changed the course of
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history.
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00:06:19,510 --> 00:06:22,590
And I said to her, well, perhaps I
should have the nose changed.
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And she said, oh, oh, my dear, oh,
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oh, why, that's your greatest asset.
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00:06:29,070 --> 00:06:31,250
Don't you do a thing to your nose.
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00:06:31,510 --> 00:06:33,490
And then I said, well, what about the
hair?
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00:06:33,710 --> 00:06:39,770
Perhaps a bit of straightening. Oh,
don't change a thing. Just go to the
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00:06:39,770 --> 00:06:40,890
and study women.
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So.
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I didn't think that I needed to spend
any more time in the museum. I spent
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of my life in the museum so far, and I
said, well, I guess I just won't work
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anymore. Forget it. I'll do something
else.
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00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,800
I can't think of anything else to say.
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00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:14,180
Then, and I'll get half the money. So I
got not only one, but I
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found two.
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00:07:15,610 --> 00:07:16,790
And I got them both down.
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And they, both of them, only spent a
week at it and managed to find
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very wealthy men and went off to travel
the world while I was left holding the
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bag. Next thing you know, I had my
mother down saying, well, I don't think
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your sister is really teaching school.
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in Nui at the nun school because I got a
postcard from her from Africa.
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You know how I knew it was from Africa.
It had nothing written on it, just
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nothing. And I found up in the upper
left -hand corner 26 degrees latitude.
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So I looked it up in the encyclopedia
and it said 26 degrees latitude is
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African. Now what is she doing in
Africa? Who is supporting her? I'd like
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00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:09,080
know.
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00:08:10,030 --> 00:08:15,530
So I said, well, perhaps she has a job
working on a steamer. You know, maybe
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00:08:15,530 --> 00:08:19,490
she's a chef or something. She said,
tell me that.
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00:08:20,170 --> 00:08:24,450
I know all about you girls. I know all
about you. You're no good. You're no
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00:08:24,450 --> 00:08:26,010
good. Who's supporting her in Africa?
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26 degrees latitude.
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Meanwhile, the next one.
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Now, then your mother said something
about hippie. You're a hippie or
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Oh, she said, yeah, you're a hippie,
right? And I said, no, I was too old to
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a hippie.
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00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:55,240
Yeah, but then you told her off and it
was a beautiful scene. Oh, yes, yes,
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yes, yes. She said, hmm.
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Making any money at what you're doing?
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00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:05,060
Painting. Anybody buy them?
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00:09:05,300 --> 00:09:06,300
Making any money?
136
00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:10,140
I said, why don't you work, work, work?
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00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:13,820
I said, why don't you work? When was the
last time you worked?
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00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:17,080
I said, I've worked all my life, all my
life.
139
00:09:17,300 --> 00:09:23,020
I said, now, my dear mother, my body's
been taking care of you for the past 30
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years.
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00:09:24,780 --> 00:09:29,760
Right, when you were my age, you were
well ensconced with your minks and
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diamonds. How is this, you?
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Who's taking care of me? Monster.
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Is all you can think about is money?
Money? Money?
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Money? Do you ever have another thought
in your whole head but money?
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And she said, why don't you leave? Why
don't you get out of here?
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Wearing this big fantastic club chair,
it's pootie painted on the wall,
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White built it, gold gilt, all the, you
know, the rejects from the 400, you
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00:09:52,300 --> 00:09:57,980
know, the 400s, grandmothers sitting
around in their black taffeta dresses
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white doorly lace collars.
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00:10:00,190 --> 00:10:05,410
sitting around table to table, and my
father's saying, Watch it. I know people
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00:10:05,410 --> 00:10:09,090
in here. Watch it. Tone it down. Tone it
down. Be careful.
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00:10:09,510 --> 00:10:13,950
I know people. I know people. And I
said, Well, I don't give a fuck who you
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know. They don't know you.
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You could be just anybody. Meanwhile,
over in the other corner of the room
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sits the one -legged millionaire from
Switzerland.
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00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:36,830
whom my father put on to us, my dear,
calling us whores. Who is
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00:10:36,830 --> 00:10:37,970
doing the pimping?
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00:10:39,470 --> 00:10:40,810
Who's doing the pimping?
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00:10:41,050 --> 00:10:45,210
Well, he called us up about a year ago
and said, girls, you must come and have
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00:10:45,210 --> 00:10:46,210
dinner with me.
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00:10:46,510 --> 00:10:50,870
I'm at the club, and there's this
wonderful man I just met. He owns half
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00:10:50,870 --> 00:10:51,870
banks in Switzerland.
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00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:55,310
So we went, and he said to us, now, be
careful.
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He's in the bar, and he's coming out.
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00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:00,860
He's got a wooden leg. Don't mention his
limp.
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I said, really?
168
00:11:05,460 --> 00:11:07,520
Don't we see Bowery buns every day?
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Don't worry, we're sophisticated.
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We've seen a limp here, a limp there.
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Canes, they're nothing new. We won't say
a word.
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So, the four of us went to dinner.
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00:11:22,700 --> 00:11:24,040
And here is...
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One leg and with one hand under the
table and one sister and one hand on me.
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Squeeze, squeeze.
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00:11:31,230 --> 00:11:35,370
Now my father's sitting over there
thinking, oh yes, I have a ranch too. I
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00:11:35,410 --> 00:11:36,410
you call that a ranch?
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00:11:37,750 --> 00:11:40,810
400 sheep that all died of tapeworm?
179
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:48,030
After you got the sheep experts in
Canada down to take care of them, who
180
00:11:48,030 --> 00:11:49,190
to rape me, by the way.
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00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:55,440
You call that a ranch? A scraggly little
sheep? And he said, I'm not paying any
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00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:58,900
attention to her. She thinks she could
run everything better than I could.
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00:11:58,900 --> 00:12:02,940
like nothing better than to have my
money and run the whole show. And I
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00:12:02,980 --> 00:12:03,980
you're damn right.
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00:12:04,660 --> 00:12:07,140
I'd sure run it a hell of a lot better
than you do.
186
00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:13,200
I'm kidding you. He took out his plane
schedule for the weekend to Texas and
187
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:18,080
asked my other sister if she'd like to
take a little trip to Texas with him to
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00:12:18,080 --> 00:12:19,080
his ranch.
189
00:12:19,340 --> 00:12:24,420
And I was getting a little jealous by
this time. I mean, I would have liked to
190
00:12:24,420 --> 00:12:28,300
go to Texas. It was awfully hot in New
York. Of course, I suppose it was hotter
191
00:12:28,300 --> 00:12:29,300
in Texas.
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00:12:29,820 --> 00:12:35,600
But anyway, there were all those black
Angus and all those goldfish ponds and
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00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:42,460
all those ranches and everything else.
And he was taking Jeanette off to the
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00:12:42,460 --> 00:12:43,460
ranch.
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00:12:45,340 --> 00:12:48,760
He shoved it back in his pocket just as
my father came back to the table.
196
00:12:49,700 --> 00:12:50,700
His schedule,
197
00:12:52,060 --> 00:12:56,060
his plane schedule, you know, should we
go TWA or Eastern or how should we go,
198
00:12:56,200 --> 00:13:02,120
and dropped us off home. And the next
week, oh, my father calls up and says,
199
00:13:02,160 --> 00:13:03,720
well, have you seen Wooden Leg?
200
00:13:04,980 --> 00:13:09,440
Your father called him up? No, he called
us up. Well, see, Wooden Leg actually
201
00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:11,280
did come to dinner, but we didn't have
any furniture.
202
00:13:12,170 --> 00:13:13,730
or any drugs or any food or anything.
203
00:13:13,950 --> 00:13:19,430
So he went out and bought Slim Jim
smoked sausages for us to eat for
204
00:13:19,430 --> 00:13:22,470
he just seemed so ill at ease there. We
had one wicker chair and a stool with
205
00:13:22,470 --> 00:13:26,470
his wooden leg up on the stool and the
wicker chair not wanting us to know it
206
00:13:26,470 --> 00:13:27,229
was wooden.
207
00:13:27,230 --> 00:13:32,470
And everything was just so tense that I
left. I went out and just left. I called
208
00:13:32,470 --> 00:13:34,930
up somebody and said, I can't take it.
I'm coming down to your house.
209
00:13:35,530 --> 00:13:36,890
So I called my sister.
210
00:13:37,090 --> 00:13:41,010
I don't know what happened. He wanted me
to comb my hair a different way.
211
00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:46,020
So I went and got a hairbrush and
started combing. No, she wouldn't get
212
00:13:46,020 --> 00:13:48,620
hairbrush and comb her hair. She said, I
don't want to comb my hair. I'll just
213
00:13:48,620 --> 00:13:52,960
spend all day in the beauty parlor. And
he said, if you can't do such a little
214
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:56,920
thing for me, just comb your hair
differently. I don't know. And he
215
00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:57,920
I'm so upset.
216
00:13:58,220 --> 00:14:01,460
So I said, well, don't worry, it was
probably the bare floors, the soot on
217
00:14:01,460 --> 00:14:05,200
floors, no furniture and no food. He
thinks, what kind of a family do they
218
00:14:05,200 --> 00:14:10,140
from? After all, all this talk about
ranches? My dear, somebody's crazy in
219
00:14:10,140 --> 00:14:11,280
family. Who is it?
220
00:14:12,500 --> 00:14:16,700
So I called my father and I said, Dad,
we just lost a customer.
221
00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:20,600
Why, why, what happened, what happened,
what happened? I thought he'd like one
222
00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:23,340
of you girls. I thought he'd like one of
you, like your little myself.
223
00:14:24,540 --> 00:14:27,920
So I said, well, he just... disappeared
into the clear blue.
224
00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:29,800
You know, we don't have any furniture.
225
00:14:30,060 --> 00:14:34,400
He said, oh, I'll send a rug right down,
right down. So the next day down came
226
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,100
wall to wall gold carpeting.
227
00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:40,500
Who, from your father? Yes, from my
father. So I thought, well, now what we
228
00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:43,740
should do is call him up every week and
say we lost another millionaire and
229
00:14:43,740 --> 00:14:48,860
perhaps we'd get furniture and stereo
record players and television sets and
230
00:14:48,860 --> 00:14:50,040
everything. So I started calling.
231
00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:52,620
The next week I said, another one just
got away.
232
00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:57,280
Dad, you've got to do something about
this. So he said, Well, I mean, when
233
00:14:57,280 --> 00:15:00,900
you've got a rug, what else do you need?
I mean, I don't have a rug. I don't sit
234
00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:01,719
on the rug.
235
00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:04,580
I said, well, look, I mean, how would
you like to walk into a house and only
236
00:15:04,580 --> 00:15:05,580
find a rug?
237
00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,900
He said, oh, all right, I'll send you
down a couch.
238
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:11,340
Well, by the end of six months, we had
the whole place furnished.
239
00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:14,300
Not a millionaire in sight, though.
240
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:20,830
Finally, the millionaire came back, and
he called me, and he said, But I must
241
00:15:20,830 --> 00:15:24,630
tell you that every time he reappeared
on the scene, he had a chain in
242
00:15:24,630 --> 00:15:28,050
Switzerland. And he said, look at my
scar on my scar. Then he was in a car
243
00:15:28,050 --> 00:15:31,110
crash. He not only carried the
photograph of the woman who hit him over
244
00:15:31,110 --> 00:15:35,710
with a chain because he wouldn't fuck
her, but he also carried a photograph of
245
00:15:35,710 --> 00:15:37,330
the Jaguar he cracked up in.
246
00:15:37,630 --> 00:15:42,990
And then the third time he came, it was
another accident. Someone beat him up.
247
00:15:43,010 --> 00:15:47,310
And I said, you don't need a wife. You
need a bodyguard and a nurse.
248
00:15:48,010 --> 00:15:49,550
Somebody to push the wheelchair.
249
00:15:56,630 --> 00:16:00,370
Well, this is just getting back to the
story about the postcard from Morocco.
250
00:16:02,110 --> 00:16:03,150
Are you still running?
251
00:16:04,210 --> 00:16:08,650
Well, we were sitting there talking
about the postcard from Morocco and the
252
00:16:08,650 --> 00:16:09,650
Metropolitan Club.
253
00:16:10,850 --> 00:16:15,730
There I looked up and there was a girl I
had known for years with a wooden leg
254
00:16:15,730 --> 00:16:16,730
man.
255
00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:22,520
And I said, oh, what a small world. They
all said they all know each other. And
256
00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:26,840
my mother said, I saw her sitting there
when I walked in, in the corner chair,
257
00:16:26,900 --> 00:16:30,160
and I said, she doesn't look like she
belongs here.
258
00:16:30,660 --> 00:16:33,340
I bet she's meeting that Swissman.
259
00:16:34,420 --> 00:16:36,960
She thinks he's ESP. The trouble is, she
does.
260
00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:42,940
My mother, and she said, I had never met
the Swissman, but I knew that's who she
261
00:16:42,940 --> 00:16:43,940
was here to meet.
262
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:49,440
And in he walked, and I knew it was him
from his limp. And sure enough, your
263
00:16:49,440 --> 00:16:52,120
father said, Oh, how are you?
264
00:16:52,740 --> 00:16:56,760
And then she went on and on again about,
I knew she'd have to be a friend of you
265
00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:57,760
girls.
266
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,360
So the Swissman... She?
267
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:05,940
Yes, the girl who was having a date with
the wooden leg guy last night.
268
00:17:06,569 --> 00:17:10,730
And the wooden leg guy was the one who
came and ran off because we didn't have
269
00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:11,569
any rugs.
270
00:17:11,569 --> 00:17:12,609
Is he still around?
271
00:17:12,970 --> 00:17:14,190
Oh, yes, he's still around.
272
00:17:14,910 --> 00:17:19,810
Maybe we should do a little... I
introduced him to Katrina, and he gave
273
00:17:19,810 --> 00:17:21,050
$300 guitar.
274
00:17:22,910 --> 00:17:25,950
And then he kept calling me up, telling
me how cold she was.
275
00:17:26,369 --> 00:17:30,050
Well, here's what he would do. He would
call up, and he would say, My darling.
276
00:17:30,270 --> 00:17:32,050
You know, he'd never even held his hand.
277
00:17:32,330 --> 00:17:34,870
Let alone give him a kiss. Let alone go
to bed. He'd say, My darling.
278
00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:37,500
I am so lonely here.
279
00:17:38,340 --> 00:17:41,480
I want to see you. Please come have
dinner with me. And I said, I thought
280
00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:45,000
were in love with my sister. And he
said, no, it was always you I loved. But
281
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:48,440
thought that you were in love with that
other man when I met you. Your sister,
282
00:17:48,520 --> 00:17:52,420
she is cold. It was always you I loved.
Please, please come and see me.
283
00:17:53,400 --> 00:17:56,240
So finally I thought, all right, I'll go
see him.
284
00:17:57,620 --> 00:17:59,100
I'm backtracking, you realize.
285
00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:01,560
We're bringing it up to about six months
ago.
286
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:09,800
I put on my only square dress I could
find and went to this horrible,
287
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:13,700
expensive restaurant, something like the
Delmonico Grill.
288
00:18:13,900 --> 00:18:18,200
And the waiter came up and said,
289
00:18:18,340 --> 00:18:21,840
Mademoiselle?
290
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:26,700
So I sat there and said, Monsieur?
291
00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:33,580
He wanted me to order. Not having been
in one of those places since I was five,
292
00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:35,940
I wasn't aware of the procedures.
293
00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:41,260
So they brought me clams on the half
-shell, beautifully done, you know, on a
294
00:18:41,260 --> 00:18:47,040
sterling silver clam plate with the
lemon wrapped in gauze so it wouldn't
295
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:48,040
in your eyes.
296
00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:52,520
And everything was so beautiful, I just
sat there staring at it for about a half
297
00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:55,680
an hour. Of course, I was stoned out of
my mind. I had to turn on to even face
298
00:18:55,680 --> 00:18:59,540
him. And I turned him on before we went.
I said, oh, have a little pot.
299
00:18:59,740 --> 00:19:03,780
Won't hurt you. Have a little pot. So
he's puffing away. And we get there and
300
00:19:03,780 --> 00:19:05,040
all I can do is stare at the clams.
301
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:06,700
And I said, they're so beautiful.
302
00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:10,340
Oh, I can't eat them. Look at them. Look
at this lemon.
303
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:16,280
All wrapped up like a little bunting. A
little baby bunting like Christ in his
304
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:19,500
swaddling clothes. What, you couldn't
eat it because you were smoking pot or
305
00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:24,290
what? Well... I got so stoned that all I
could do was look at it. I didn't want
306
00:19:24,290 --> 00:19:26,230
to deface it by eating it, you see.
307
00:19:26,670 --> 00:19:31,050
So, oh, wooden leg was getting terribly,
uh, pretty terrible. He thought I was
308
00:19:31,050 --> 00:19:34,210
crazy. Here he takes a starving
creature. How were you dressed?
309
00:19:34,630 --> 00:19:41,230
Well, I had on a beige crepe dress from
Jack's. A floor length? Remember
310
00:19:41,230 --> 00:19:44,330
Jack's? A floor length? No, it was
ordinary length.
311
00:19:44,550 --> 00:19:47,190
This was before the mini. It was about
to here.
312
00:19:47,950 --> 00:19:53,930
And I had on sort of a ratty long
sweater and some amber beads
313
00:19:53,930 --> 00:19:56,270
and three -inch spikes.
314
00:19:58,250 --> 00:20:03,550
You mean you were dressing for the
restaurant?
315
00:20:03,850 --> 00:20:05,010
Yeah, for the restaurant, right.
316
00:20:06,050 --> 00:20:10,490
And I kept saying, then he started
pulling out more photographs.
317
00:20:10,750 --> 00:20:14,290
He said, this is the girl who beat me
up. I said, you showed me that six
318
00:20:14,290 --> 00:20:15,290
ago.
319
00:20:16,170 --> 00:20:17,190
That's what he likes.
320
00:20:17,790 --> 00:20:22,930
Oh, and then last night when we met, he
came up to me and said, he just got in
321
00:20:22,930 --> 00:20:26,750
an accident again six months ago, six
weeks ago. It was the first thing he
322
00:20:26,750 --> 00:20:31,570
us when he walked in. He said things
like, like, the doctors, the doctors
323
00:20:31,570 --> 00:20:34,670
me I'm a superman, superman. I should
have been in the hospital for two years.
324
00:20:34,710 --> 00:20:38,250
My jaw was cracked up. My teeth were
falling out. I'm a superman. I had my
325
00:20:38,250 --> 00:20:39,510
dentist in there in two days.
326
00:20:39,750 --> 00:20:44,270
And he completely fixed me up. And I was
walked right out of there in six weeks.
327
00:20:44,630 --> 00:20:47,090
Walked out so he could get into his next
accident, right?
328
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:51,080
So anyway, my father said, well, I just
can't understand why he isn't seeing
329
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:54,600
your sister anymore. I mean, maybe he
found out about her past.
330
00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,800
Maybe he found out about her past. I
said, what do you mean her past? He
331
00:20:57,900 --> 00:21:01,120
you know, that fella she was living
with.
332
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:04,400
I said, oh, I'm sure he understands.
After all, you know, I'm sure he's had
333
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,160
mistresses. This woman hit him in the
head with a chain because he wouldn't
334
00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:09,060
her. You know, he must have been fucking
her before.
335
00:21:09,460 --> 00:21:13,060
He said, I'm going to talk about that.
Well, what did I bring up? Of course he
336
00:21:13,060 --> 00:21:16,400
doesn't have mistresses. I mean, of
course he doesn't have women. I mean,
337
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:19,520
fine man, a fine man, a pillar of the
community.
338
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:23,080
And I said, but Dad, he's 50 years old.
339
00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:26,880
Surely you're not trying to say he went
through his life without ever, you know,
340
00:21:26,900 --> 00:21:27,900
getting laid.
341
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:31,910
And he said, I don't suppose he was
divorced, do you? Divorce, can't have a
342
00:21:31,910 --> 00:21:34,550
divorce, can't have a divorce. I mean,
he already had her married off to him,
343
00:21:34,610 --> 00:21:35,610
right?
344
00:21:35,930 --> 00:21:38,510
So, uh, getting bored?
345
00:21:40,290 --> 00:21:44,290
No, I like to listen to just parts of
conversations.
346
00:21:44,570 --> 00:21:49,150
Sometimes I follow the story, and then I
just listen to parts.
347
00:21:49,990 --> 00:21:54,630
Or besides, I believe that my
unconscious is still listening, so I
348
00:21:54,630 --> 00:21:55,630
it's important.
349
00:21:55,870 --> 00:21:57,930
I mean, you can do all kinds of things.
350
00:21:58,230 --> 00:21:59,230
You can...
351
00:22:00,660 --> 00:22:03,440
Somebody mumbling. I think you get
almost as much.
352
00:22:05,340 --> 00:22:07,460
You really do.
353
00:22:07,860 --> 00:22:08,860
Sometimes.
354
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:13,120
Can we turn it off for a minute?
355
00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:21,960
Well, as a young girl should be at the
time, I believed him. I thought, not
356
00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:25,000
am I a manic depressive, paranoid
schizophrenic.
357
00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:31,160
That said, I read through the whole
Freudian textbook, but on top of that,
358
00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:35,180
suddenly I discovered that I'm frigid.
Goodness, I doubled up my visits to the
359
00:22:35,180 --> 00:22:37,600
psychiatrist. Two dollars instead of one
dollar.
360
00:22:38,380 --> 00:22:42,660
I had to spawn welfare eventually to try
to cure my frigidity.
361
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:49,340
Finally, he started talking about
sadomasochism, you know, whipping, and
362
00:22:49,340 --> 00:22:51,300
very interested in it, it seemed.
363
00:22:51,880 --> 00:22:56,140
He started reading the, you know,
Histoire d 'Eau, the story of all, and
364
00:22:56,140 --> 00:22:58,440
recommended it to me, so I read it.
365
00:22:58,660 --> 00:23:00,340
And I said, that's a lot of trash.
366
00:23:02,660 --> 00:23:06,500
The first two chapters are fine, but
after you get into it, you realize it
367
00:23:06,500 --> 00:23:09,940
definitely was not written by any
Pauline Rayal or whatever her name was
368
00:23:09,940 --> 00:23:13,440
supposed to be. Some man, just like you,
wrote it to con us women into thinking
369
00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:14,820
we should all be massacres.
370
00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:17,880
So I went to a literary expert.
371
00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:25,100
who was also in on the F &M underground
in New York, a woman, and said, who did
372
00:23:25,100 --> 00:23:29,540
write this book? She said, well,
everybody knows it was André Breton.
373
00:23:29,740 --> 00:23:33,920
Everybody knows that in Paris was André
Breton, because it wasn't a woman.
374
00:23:34,420 --> 00:23:39,500
So I thought, not only did I get the
dope on who wrote the book, but I should
375
00:23:39,500 --> 00:23:44,180
introduce this woman to this lover I
had. Now she could, you know, find him
376
00:23:44,180 --> 00:23:45,620
slave girls and so on.
377
00:23:46,110 --> 00:23:48,870
So I brought them up, and they hit it
off like mad.
378
00:23:49,690 --> 00:23:55,110
He said to me, now there's a real woman,
real European woman. Can you believe
379
00:23:55,110 --> 00:24:00,530
it? In 1967, he was still talking about
European women versus American women.
380
00:24:00,790 --> 00:24:07,290
Can you believe it? Well, anyway, this
woman was, as a matter of
381
00:24:07,290 --> 00:24:13,150
fact... Was what?
382
00:24:13,510 --> 00:24:14,510
European?
383
00:24:16,220 --> 00:24:17,220
Well,
384
00:24:17,620 --> 00:24:23,580
she was about 55 when she had just given
birth, she said.
385
00:24:24,660 --> 00:24:29,580
Anyway, he really dug the whole thing,
that she was really a woman and she knew
386
00:24:29,580 --> 00:24:32,540
what he was talking about. Of course,
when he left, she said to me, get rid of
387
00:24:32,540 --> 00:24:33,540
him.
388
00:24:33,700 --> 00:24:37,400
Well, anyway, he called me up every day,
please get me a slave girl, get me a
389
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:40,940
slave girl, get me a slave girl. That
woman must know some slave girls. After
390
00:24:40,940 --> 00:24:43,060
all, you know, all those parties she
goes to. So I said...
391
00:24:43,660 --> 00:24:46,820
Well, my dear, I have searched high and
low, and you will never find a slave
392
00:24:46,820 --> 00:24:50,300
girl that will hold your interest half
as much as I, so I'll volunteer.
393
00:24:50,940 --> 00:24:51,940
I'll be right down.
394
00:24:52,620 --> 00:24:55,820
I was madly in love with him. Having a
nervous breakdown, thought I was frigid.
395
00:24:55,820 --> 00:24:58,320
You know I would have tried anything, so
down I went in the taxi.
396
00:25:00,140 --> 00:25:01,140
He said,
397
00:25:02,220 --> 00:25:09,150
Now, now, dear, take off your panties.
on the way down i want the
398
00:25:09,150 --> 00:25:15,450
image of you sitting with the cold tacky
leather against your bare thighs and i
399
00:25:15,450 --> 00:25:18,970
said all right i'll do everything so i
got down kept my clothes on of course it
400
00:25:18,970 --> 00:25:22,470
was freezing cold whipped into a
restaurant went in the ladies room took
401
00:25:22,470 --> 00:25:28,190
leotard pants etc came creeping up the
stairs and said here i am don't talk he
402
00:25:28,190 --> 00:25:32,650
said don't say a word kneel down don't
talk put your hands behind your back
403
00:25:32,650 --> 00:25:33,690
take off your boots
404
00:25:35,020 --> 00:25:38,940
Well, he gave me two whacks for this
whip that were enough. I mean, Christ
405
00:25:38,940 --> 00:25:43,000
wouldn't have been able to stand it
lying on the cross, you know.
406
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:47,580
Father, forgive them. He would have just
wrenched himself off and killed whoever
407
00:25:47,580 --> 00:25:48,960
did it. Did that ever hurt?
408
00:25:49,420 --> 00:25:52,840
Two whacks on the soles of my feet.
409
00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:58,140
But I stood it. I actually stood it. I
thought, if there is anything to cure
410
00:25:58,140 --> 00:26:02,440
frigidity and this is it, I'll do it. I
want to be a real woman, European style.
411
00:26:03,280 --> 00:26:04,300
Love it, dig it.
412
00:26:04,740 --> 00:26:06,320
What did you say to him when he hit you?
413
00:26:06,540 --> 00:26:07,540
I screamed.
414
00:26:09,260 --> 00:26:10,260
And he said,
415
00:26:11,900 --> 00:26:13,840
no, you couldn't take it.
416
00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:18,900
No, you couldn't take it. I said, I can
take it. I can take it. I won't scream
417
00:26:18,900 --> 00:26:21,680
again. Then he hit me on the palms of
the hands. Well, if you think the soles
418
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:22,680
the feet are bad.
419
00:26:23,340 --> 00:26:25,760
You should experience the palms of the
hands.
420
00:26:26,220 --> 00:26:29,180
Oh, God. She'll never play the piano
again. Pain.
421
00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:33,180
Boy, I had a welt on my hand. I thought
my hand was broken.
422
00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:40,360
Of course, I had been used to it from
daily family squabbles as a child.
423
00:26:40,940 --> 00:26:47,100
So then he threw me on the bed and
started again, and I said, Stop, you've
424
00:26:47,100 --> 00:26:50,780
the wrong girl. You're right. I can't
make this scene. I'll have to be frigid
425
00:26:50,780 --> 00:26:51,800
for the rest of my life.
426
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:53,400
Can't do it.
427
00:26:53,820 --> 00:26:55,380
You know what he really wanted?
428
00:26:56,360 --> 00:26:58,500
He really wanted me to beat him up.
429
00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:02,540
Here, would you like to hear the
conclusion of the whole thing?
430
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:07,360
Yeah. Well, this is going on while my
sister is up in the rugless apartment
431
00:27:07,360 --> 00:27:10,460
the wooden leg guy and he's telling her
to brush her hair another way. This was
432
00:27:10,460 --> 00:27:14,280
the same night I went down there to him
to get away from the wooden leg guy.
433
00:27:14,820 --> 00:27:16,280
And what did I run into?
434
00:27:17,180 --> 00:27:18,180
Torture.
435
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:25,390
So... I... I decided to stop seeing him
for a while while my bruises healed.
436
00:27:26,350 --> 00:27:29,250
Well, but did he give you money or
anything?
437
00:27:29,450 --> 00:27:30,450
Money! Money!
438
00:27:30,610 --> 00:27:35,050
The cheapest son of a bitch in the
world. Now, we had, you know, a cup of
439
00:27:35,050 --> 00:27:38,870
and a little oatmeal and chatted, went
back to our intellectual conversations,
440
00:27:39,430 --> 00:27:41,390
talked about Proust, you know.
441
00:27:44,460 --> 00:27:49,400
And Marie Bonaparte, who wrote a new
book on women and sexuality and all that
442
00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:53,740
garbage Freudian bullshit. She's the
current writer, Marie Bonaparte? Marie
443
00:27:53,740 --> 00:27:56,800
Bonaparte, current writer, straight from
the arms of Freud.
444
00:27:57,200 --> 00:28:00,460
You see, the trouble with it, they're
right, don't trust anybody over 30.
445
00:28:00,580 --> 00:28:04,420
Anybody over 30 is hung up on this
Freudian, European -American women.
446
00:28:07,100 --> 00:28:09,700
heterosexual, super heterosexual bag.
447
00:28:10,060 --> 00:28:14,440
And the way I figure it out is the super
heterosexual bag is just simply
448
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:16,100
sadomasochism. That's all.
449
00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:19,840
Sadomasochism. Forget it. I'd rather be
a lesbian.
450
00:28:21,760 --> 00:28:22,780
So I went home.
451
00:28:23,140 --> 00:28:26,100
A few weeks later, I was there. You'd
rather be what?
452
00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:30,220
A lesbian? Well, I'd rather be a lesbian
than heterosexual. If all the
453
00:28:30,220 --> 00:28:33,160
heterosexual men I know, and they're all
like that.
454
00:28:33,740 --> 00:28:37,520
are all like that, and it seems that
they're all like that. You know, big
455
00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:39,540
You have to go to lower classes.
456
00:28:39,900 --> 00:28:42,660
Oh, I tried lower classes. They were all
impotent.
457
00:28:43,900 --> 00:28:44,819
Tea heads.
458
00:28:44,820 --> 00:28:49,160
Yeah, this construction work. He said,
baby, I'm a tea head. And I'm a tea
459
00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:51,200
I'll always be a tea head. A tea head.
460
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:53,420
And I said, okay, smoke some tea.
461
00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:57,440
So he smoked some tea, and I was trying
to get out of the house. This was just
462
00:28:57,440 --> 00:28:58,440
the other day.
463
00:28:59,340 --> 00:29:02,080
He said, baby, I just got this vision.
464
00:29:04,690 --> 00:29:07,450
of you going down on me and fighting me
off.
465
00:29:07,710 --> 00:29:10,970
And I said, well, make sure you keep it
a vision because I'm leaving the house
466
00:29:10,970 --> 00:29:11,970
right now.
467
00:29:12,630 --> 00:29:15,650
So I went in the bedroom to put on the
rest of my makeup.
468
00:29:17,290 --> 00:29:22,290
And he must have just seen a movie with
Marilyn Brando or something because when
469
00:29:22,290 --> 00:29:26,570
I got to the door of the bedroom, there
he was, posed in the doorway, light
470
00:29:26,570 --> 00:29:29,910
behind him, dark in the bedroom. And I
said, oh, God, do I have to go through
471
00:29:29,910 --> 00:29:30,489
this again?
472
00:29:30,490 --> 00:29:33,550
And I tried to crawl under his arm and
he came and he said, baby.
473
00:29:34,830 --> 00:29:35,830
T -Head.
474
00:29:36,150 --> 00:29:37,290
Grabbed me by the hair.
475
00:29:37,970 --> 00:29:40,550
Shoved my head down and said, open my
pants.
476
00:29:41,030 --> 00:29:42,570
I said, you must be kidding.
477
00:29:42,810 --> 00:29:45,430
What, you used to be so gentle and
impotent. What happened?
478
00:29:46,150 --> 00:29:47,450
Remember Port Jeff?
479
00:29:47,750 --> 00:29:51,130
We used to go to Port Jeff to fish and
cook clams.
480
00:29:51,370 --> 00:29:52,590
Port Jefferson, Long Island.
481
00:29:53,130 --> 00:29:56,510
I said, remember the fun we used to have
at Port Jeff? He never grabbed me by
482
00:29:56,510 --> 00:30:00,310
the hair on my head. I mean, it just
grew out after being, you know, Vietnam
483
00:30:00,310 --> 00:30:04,430
rubble two years ago. I finally got it
to grow out. Don't rip it all out again.
484
00:30:06,290 --> 00:30:09,130
It seems that everything runs in
parallels, you know?
485
00:30:09,730 --> 00:30:12,490
So he kept it up. I said, I'm sorry, but
I'm going to have to scream.
486
00:30:13,210 --> 00:30:16,050
He didn't think I'd scream, so I let out
a piercing shriek.
487
00:30:16,530 --> 00:30:18,510
The doctor upstairs playing the piano.
488
00:30:19,260 --> 00:30:23,040
All brain surgeons play the piano in
their spare time. Did you know that?
489
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:27,200
I saw this, and James Mason did it in
the seventh veil.
490
00:30:27,500 --> 00:30:28,500
He played the piano?
491
00:30:28,740 --> 00:30:31,040
I think it was a brain surgeon, a
psychiatrist.
492
00:30:31,940 --> 00:30:36,720
Well, one's as bad as the other. Oh,
that's the opposite one.
493
00:30:37,560 --> 00:30:41,520
Well, anyway, he tried to pull my hair,
so I screamed again, and he realized
494
00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:43,360
that I meant it, and he let me go.
495
00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:45,500
And he drove me downtown.
496
00:30:46,220 --> 00:30:49,690
Anyway. That is the lower classes for
you.
497
00:30:50,210 --> 00:30:54,830
Back to the middle classes, or shall we
say the intellectuals. What?
498
00:30:59,650 --> 00:31:00,650
Fresh.
499
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:15,800
Balling buffaloes lately?
500
00:32:16,460 --> 00:32:20,560
Balling buffaloes? No, but I've seen
humping horses.
501
00:32:20,980 --> 00:32:22,320
No, it's humping hyenas.
502
00:32:24,980 --> 00:32:26,460
It's humping donkeys.
503
00:32:29,700 --> 00:32:36,340
Louder. Disease donkeys and populating
canaries and gonorrhea goats and
504
00:32:36,340 --> 00:32:37,340
cobras.
505
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:41,000
Don't be shy.
506
00:32:41,700 --> 00:32:43,140
That's all I can think of.
507
00:32:43,550 --> 00:32:45,470
Did you ever actually see any of these?
508
00:32:45,670 --> 00:32:48,070
Oh, yeah, I see them every time I walk
through the park.
509
00:32:48,330 --> 00:32:51,490
The park, very dangerous place to walk
these days.
510
00:32:54,010 --> 00:32:55,630
What else have you seen in the park?
511
00:32:59,090 --> 00:33:01,190
No, I hallucinate when I go in the park.
512
00:33:01,710 --> 00:33:05,690
I take a trip and then I go jumping
through the park. Through the park's
513
00:33:05,690 --> 00:33:12,130
beauties, raw nature exposed in the
nerve end of New York City.
514
00:33:12,640 --> 00:33:13,640
Faces on the stones.
515
00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:16,980
Faces on the stones lying in their own
blood.
516
00:33:19,920 --> 00:33:21,600
Well, speaking of sex,
517
00:33:22,340 --> 00:33:25,580
you know what the taxi driver said to me
yesterday?
518
00:33:26,080 --> 00:33:27,080
What?
519
00:33:27,220 --> 00:33:30,880
He said the government should give all
these hookers, Simmons, beauty rest,
520
00:33:30,980 --> 00:33:34,580
mattresses, and a cash register and put
them to work.
521
00:33:35,020 --> 00:33:36,340
Help the economy.
522
00:33:36,820 --> 00:33:38,500
What are they complaining about?
523
00:33:39,340 --> 00:33:40,920
The one before that.
524
00:33:41,340 --> 00:33:46,360
said that he couldn't stand going down
42nd Street because of all these girls
525
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:50,580
walking the street. It's just too much.
I mean, 10 years ago, it wasn't like
526
00:33:50,580 --> 00:33:53,940
that around New York. Things have really
changed. It was men. So I said, where
527
00:33:53,940 --> 00:33:55,400
did they walk 10 years ago?
528
00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:59,880
That's what I said to him. What do you
mean, girls? I only see men walking the
529
00:33:59,880 --> 00:34:06,380
street. No, it was men 10 years ago, but
now it's very... You know, you can't
530
00:34:06,380 --> 00:34:07,380
tell.
531
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:08,800
...antiseptic.
532
00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:10,840
on 42nd Street.
533
00:34:12,659 --> 00:34:17,080
Because they removed the arcade where
all the men used to cruise. All the lost
534
00:34:17,080 --> 00:34:19,480
people used to wander 42nd Street.
535
00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:22,620
And you'd take them home with you and
everything.
536
00:34:23,060 --> 00:34:25,760
It saved thousands of people, you know.
537
00:34:26,620 --> 00:34:30,940
That's why the hippie movement started
because they all were driven away from
538
00:34:30,940 --> 00:34:33,659
where they could be cruised and taken
home.
539
00:34:34,159 --> 00:34:36,159
So they had to go out in the park.
540
00:34:36,719 --> 00:34:37,719
Parks.
541
00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:43,920
And they have to freak out now in rooms
with 20 other people breathing and
542
00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:50,860
snoring. Whereas before, they would go
to a lavish apartment with a grand
543
00:34:50,860 --> 00:34:51,860
piano.
544
00:34:55,820 --> 00:34:57,780
It's always lavish.
545
00:35:00,140 --> 00:35:02,020
It's private anyway.
546
00:35:02,240 --> 00:35:06,320
At least there's only one other person
there. Sometimes two.
547
00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:07,760
That's more lively.
548
00:35:08,509 --> 00:35:11,850
So, in other words, it's all just people
who don't have homes, right?
549
00:35:12,530 --> 00:35:14,350
Arcades and hippie parks. Right.
550
00:35:14,750 --> 00:35:17,250
Why are we always talking about the
hippies? Isn't there anything more
551
00:35:17,250 --> 00:35:18,250
interesting around?
552
00:35:18,870 --> 00:35:21,330
I don't know if that's the other thing.
I mean,
553
00:35:23,170 --> 00:35:25,350
we're beginning to sound like Newsweek,
you know?
554
00:35:26,770 --> 00:35:28,290
Hippiedom. Trouble and hippiedom.
555
00:35:29,370 --> 00:35:31,670
My mother called me up and said, Are you
a hippie?
556
00:35:32,310 --> 00:35:34,650
And I said, I'm too old to be a hippie.
557
00:35:35,180 --> 00:35:37,340
She said, well, I read about them in the
Saturday Evening Post.
558
00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:40,640
And I said, well, what did it say? And
she said, it just made me want to vomit.
559
00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:41,760
Just sick.
560
00:35:42,540 --> 00:35:45,920
So I told her that I gave myself a new
name. And she said, that's what the
561
00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:48,840
hippies do. You must be a hippie. You
must be a hippie.
562
00:35:49,580 --> 00:35:50,960
Then she told me they were dead.
563
00:35:51,980 --> 00:35:52,980
Because.
564
00:35:55,140 --> 00:35:56,900
Because. I come from taxi drivers.
565
00:35:57,320 --> 00:35:58,580
Sad. Go ahead, Ingrid.
566
00:35:58,900 --> 00:36:00,360
Did you ever hear of a substitute?
567
00:36:00,580 --> 00:36:04,060
It was a substitute. No, no, no, no, no,
no. Well, you can. say it better than I
568
00:36:04,060 --> 00:36:08,260
used to. Now you have to go into the
background of it. How he said this girl,
569
00:36:08,400 --> 00:36:12,360
she couldn't have been more than six,
she couldn't have been more than 16, got
570
00:36:12,360 --> 00:36:16,800
in the taxi and he said, you know, what
are you doing? She just got to town and
571
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:20,840
things were a little rough and what are
you doing? She said, I'm a substitute
572
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:25,800
for a prostitute who's destitute in an
institute.
573
00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:29,320
And her name was I'm a schmuck.
574
00:36:29,760 --> 00:36:30,980
Now that was your line.
575
00:36:31,720 --> 00:36:35,560
Oh, no, that's right. You said Amish
muck. He said Amish muck. And you said,
576
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:37,380
what's the difference? One leg over
another.
577
00:37:00,680 --> 00:37:02,120
What do you do besides resisting?
578
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:08,960
Telephone again.
579
00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:12,940
Take that from me. No, you had the band
-aids.
580
00:37:13,780 --> 00:37:18,600
I had the lipstick. No, you had the band
-aids. I do not wish to argue.
581
00:37:19,540 --> 00:37:22,940
And could I distinctly see lipstick on
your nipples?
582
00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:24,680
See, I don't think there's any.
583
00:37:25,260 --> 00:37:27,820
It's only the third time I've seen
nipples.
584
00:37:28,240 --> 00:37:32,840
But... I would say they were the natural
color. Don't touch him. He gets
585
00:37:32,840 --> 00:37:36,240
violent. He might hit you in the ear.
No. He's so shy. He couldn't do that.
586
00:37:36,460 --> 00:37:38,380
Shy. Shy. See,
587
00:37:39,260 --> 00:37:40,980
he's so shy. He's afraid to be touched.
588
00:37:41,560 --> 00:37:43,360
See, she knows that. I think he's a
virgin.
589
00:37:43,740 --> 00:37:44,740
Are you a virgin?
590
00:37:45,100 --> 00:37:46,100
Definitely.
591
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:49,480
Like Andrew.
592
00:37:50,920 --> 00:37:51,920
Sure.
593
00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:53,560
But I have possibilities.
594
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:55,560
Of what?
595
00:37:56,500 --> 00:37:57,500
Of being.
596
00:37:59,370 --> 00:38:01,190
Oh, a non -virgin.
597
00:38:02,990 --> 00:38:04,650
Well, who's going to break you in?
598
00:38:05,890 --> 00:38:06,950
Many have tried.
599
00:38:07,210 --> 00:38:08,530
Few have succeeded.
600
00:38:10,410 --> 00:38:12,950
Didn't you tell me that I turned you on
the other day?
601
00:38:13,470 --> 00:38:15,030
I said you had possibilities.
602
00:38:15,450 --> 00:38:16,990
That's what I say to them all.
603
00:38:20,090 --> 00:38:21,090
No, they do.
604
00:38:21,190 --> 00:38:24,250
I mean, I like a woman's body. It's very
lovely and everything.
605
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:27,840
What do you like better, a man's body or
a woman's body? Well, lately, I don't
606
00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:30,380
know. I've been digging the loneliness
scene.
607
00:38:31,780 --> 00:38:32,780
Asexuality?
608
00:38:33,180 --> 00:38:34,180
What's that?
609
00:38:34,240 --> 00:38:35,680
You just don't indulge?
610
00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:36,920
What's that?
611
00:38:37,060 --> 00:38:38,760
Just so that you get another pat.
612
00:38:39,460 --> 00:38:40,460
Fresh?
613
00:38:43,260 --> 00:38:47,500
Oh, let me see your pat. Oh, this is
getting more like a cocktail bounce than
614
00:38:47,500 --> 00:38:52,700
Grants Village scene. Listen, the new
word is pansexuality.
615
00:38:54,450 --> 00:38:58,130
Pan -sexuality, like pan -American,
stops at every port.
616
00:39:00,630 --> 00:39:03,310
You've got straw coming out of your
thing.
617
00:39:08,150 --> 00:39:12,350
Well, let's talk about your... Better to
have straw today than nothing.
618
00:39:13,010 --> 00:39:16,610
I think the tit is not bad at all.
619
00:39:17,990 --> 00:39:18,990
Oh,
620
00:39:19,930 --> 00:39:21,030
I mean when they were new.
621
00:39:22,280 --> 00:39:23,600
Before they got deflated.
622
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:27,660
No, when they were sticking out of the
hanger. They used to be long, right?
623
00:39:27,660 --> 00:39:31,720
they never could quite sit in the
hanger. Their noses would stick out. And
624
00:39:31,720 --> 00:39:36,060
love them because they're lighter color.
I think gray and dark colors are silly.
625
00:39:36,700 --> 00:39:41,420
I should have brought my breast book
with me.
626
00:39:42,620 --> 00:39:43,800
Your breast book?
627
00:39:44,040 --> 00:39:48,480
Yes, there's a whole book on breasts.
There's 412 ,000 varieties.
628
00:39:49,990 --> 00:39:53,770
And your breath tells you what kind of a
woman you are, and if you change your
629
00:39:53,770 --> 00:39:55,830
personality, you can change the shape of
your breath.
630
00:39:56,250 --> 00:39:58,630
Well, it is A, B, C, D, E, F, G, and H.
631
00:39:58,890 --> 00:40:01,730
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven,
eight. What am I?
632
00:40:02,590 --> 00:40:05,810
Ingrid actually is the most womanly.
633
00:40:06,330 --> 00:40:07,330
Of the three?
634
00:40:07,950 --> 00:40:09,930
Yes, I'm immature and childish.
635
00:40:10,230 --> 00:40:11,230
And what am I?
636
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:15,260
Well, they have one out on men, but I
haven't got it yet. We haven't found the
637
00:40:15,260 --> 00:40:19,340
names for you yet. If the nipple stands
up, it means that you definitely have a
638
00:40:19,340 --> 00:40:22,440
breast in opposition to just the chest.
639
00:40:22,820 --> 00:40:25,620
They inflate when you touch them. Oh,
well, then you have a breast.
640
00:40:27,220 --> 00:40:28,220
Sensual.
641
00:40:30,180 --> 00:40:32,960
How do you feel being surrounded by two
girls?
642
00:40:33,240 --> 00:40:35,160
I think we're girls as far as I know.
643
00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:38,180
You'd rather be surrounded by girls or
guys?
644
00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:44,820
There's no Rathers in this world, baby.
645
00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:52,800
Well, everybody is there. The Rathers
all flew over the North Vietnam and
646
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:54,500
dropped their bombs long ago.
647
00:40:58,420 --> 00:41:01,440
But I think I like being surrounded by
myself.
648
00:41:03,360 --> 00:41:05,420
And then I go on from there.
649
00:41:05,760 --> 00:41:09,100
Well, why don't you just get yourself a
room with mirrors all the way around and
650
00:41:09,100 --> 00:41:10,320
a ceiling and a floor?
651
00:41:11,070 --> 00:41:14,990
Like, look at Samaras, to the whole
mirror room, and you can see yourself...
652
00:41:15,030 --> 00:41:19,010
I don't like that much. I like just one
full -length mirror.
653
00:41:19,930 --> 00:41:21,530
Then you can become a narcissist.
654
00:41:22,770 --> 00:41:23,770
Narcissist!
655
00:41:24,090 --> 00:41:28,050
No, you were right the first time.
Narcissist. I gave up looking in mirrors
656
00:41:28,050 --> 00:41:30,690
three months, Juan. Why the first three
months?
657
00:41:31,290 --> 00:41:34,630
Because I thought I was becoming a
nurse.
658
00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:40,240
Boy, that's a lot. That old myth of
narcissists, like the myth of onanism,
659
00:41:40,240 --> 00:41:45,760
completely misinterpreted. Plus the
myth, which we went into the last time
660
00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:49,860
were together, double orgasm, which was
also exploded recently.
661
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:53,480
Narcissists actually... Who exploded a
double orgasm?
662
00:41:54,840 --> 00:42:00,440
No. The myth of the female double
orgasm, clitoral versus vaginal, was
663
00:42:00,440 --> 00:42:03,220
by the top psychiatrists in the country
at the Washington...
664
00:42:03,710 --> 00:42:08,430
Psychiatric Institute a few weeks ago,
but we've already gone into that. I
665
00:42:08,430 --> 00:42:14,870
care what any institute or anyone on the
podium explodes.
666
00:42:18,410 --> 00:42:22,750
Anyway, back to Narcissus. He really
wasn't in love with himself, you know.
667
00:42:24,250 --> 00:42:27,190
As Christ said, dig thyself.
668
00:42:27,810 --> 00:42:29,090
Break in half.
669
00:42:30,390 --> 00:42:31,970
Now you're getting...
670
00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:34,940
Love thy neighbor as you love yourself.
671
00:42:36,040 --> 00:42:39,600
So loving yourself is very good. Both my
neighbors are women, though.
672
00:42:40,620 --> 00:42:42,680
I mean, in the place where I live.
673
00:42:42,940 --> 00:42:44,040
Do you like to be beaten?
674
00:42:45,420 --> 00:42:46,640
Only by Greeks.
675
00:42:48,100 --> 00:42:52,420
The only people I trust are Greeks
because... Can you pass me my orange
676
00:42:52,460 --> 00:42:57,280
please? They're totally oriented with
something.
677
00:42:57,840 --> 00:42:58,840
Thank you.
678
00:43:02,890 --> 00:43:04,830
The jacket is very sensual.
679
00:43:05,890 --> 00:43:08,870
Some poor... Some poor cow.
680
00:43:11,230 --> 00:43:12,510
Some poor cow.
681
00:43:13,890 --> 00:43:14,890
That pill.
682
00:43:18,170 --> 00:43:19,390
You're very pretty.
683
00:43:20,090 --> 00:43:21,090
So are you.
684
00:43:21,930 --> 00:43:25,670
That's the trouble with being around
homosexuals. You always feel like
685
00:43:25,670 --> 00:43:27,570
up because you know you're not
appreciated.
686
00:43:28,910 --> 00:43:32,090
They would know the difference one way
or the other. But I like you both ways.
687
00:43:32,800 --> 00:43:36,360
Oh, in other words, they wouldn't know
the difference because I could be one or
688
00:43:36,360 --> 00:43:38,360
the other. That wasn't what I meant. We
were on our own.
689
00:43:40,040 --> 00:43:41,280
I agree.
690
00:43:42,500 --> 00:43:44,640
I mean, I like it to get really
complicated.
691
00:43:45,620 --> 00:43:50,120
Like getting into a cave and you just go
all the way. You explore.
692
00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:55,540
Pansexuality. You get so involved, it's
very dangerous then.
693
00:43:56,760 --> 00:44:01,020
So then, at least you've discovered
something, you know.
694
00:44:03,820 --> 00:44:04,980
Feet go way in.
695
00:44:08,300 --> 00:44:15,300
I almost feel like they're my song
again. Oh, by all means, sing for us.
696
00:44:15,400 --> 00:44:16,359
I think it's awesome.
697
00:44:16,360 --> 00:44:17,360
No,
698
00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:19,760
that's the menu.
699
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:20,960
It's not a song.
700
00:44:23,160 --> 00:44:25,380
Oh, didn't we just make up a new song?
701
00:44:25,640 --> 00:44:26,640
What was it?
702
00:44:26,760 --> 00:44:27,760
Um,
703
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:31,600
uh... You're my makeup, sweetheart.
704
00:44:32,360 --> 00:44:33,360
Where's Louie?
705
00:44:49,389 --> 00:44:56,070
I like the original
706
00:44:56,070 --> 00:44:57,530
words because of their simplicity.
707
00:44:58,720 --> 00:45:03,020
Take up the lap in my skin. You know,
they have a new face -lifting thing
708
00:45:03,020 --> 00:45:04,560
they burn you all off with acid.
709
00:45:05,220 --> 00:45:11,160
And then they put antibiotics on it, and
in two weeks you have baby -fine skin.
710
00:45:11,900 --> 00:45:18,440
Baby -fine in two weeks. Baby -fine.
After all, they are paying me
711
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:25,020
$1 .25 an hour plus tips, which haven't
been too
712
00:45:25,020 --> 00:45:26,280
generous lately.
713
00:45:27,880 --> 00:45:29,180
Where do you work?
714
00:45:29,380 --> 00:45:36,120
Here. I like Warren Beatty because he is
so young and rich and handsome and
715
00:45:36,120 --> 00:45:38,700
designer and suave and a fine actor.
716
00:45:39,980 --> 00:45:42,060
I hope he never sees this picture.
717
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:48,480
In what movies? Oh, in Bonnie and Clyde.
Did you see him in The Rolling Spring
718
00:45:48,480 --> 00:45:49,480
of Mrs. Stone?
719
00:45:49,780 --> 00:45:51,200
No. Wow.
720
00:46:03,880 --> 00:46:05,880
Well, I don't have all day, my dear.
721
00:46:07,500 --> 00:46:13,200
Surely out of all of those entrees, hors
d 'oeuvres,
722
00:46:13,200 --> 00:46:18,240
wine, soup, not to put it, you should be
able to find something you'd like to
723
00:46:18,240 --> 00:46:19,240
eat.
724
00:46:21,860 --> 00:46:25,220
How about an omelette, western style?
725
00:46:28,980 --> 00:46:29,980
French toast?
726
00:46:41,159 --> 00:46:42,680
Cheeseburger deluxe.
727
00:46:46,980 --> 00:46:48,020
What else?
728
00:46:49,700 --> 00:46:51,660
Fried ham with pineapple.
729
00:46:54,940 --> 00:46:56,060
I know.
730
00:46:58,920 --> 00:47:01,780
Corned beef with a poached egg.
731
00:47:03,860 --> 00:47:05,600
Hash, that's what it is.
732
00:47:07,460 --> 00:47:11,080
I'd rather have ready -made. sandwich.
733
00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:13,920
Whatever kind you've got.
734
00:47:14,260 --> 00:47:15,260
Beef.
735
00:47:16,560 --> 00:47:21,600
Do you have ham and cheese?
736
00:47:25,100 --> 00:47:28,140
Is that what you want?
737
00:47:30,280 --> 00:47:34,180
Pick on me, Sally.
738
00:47:36,000 --> 00:47:37,100
The next two?
739
00:47:40,910 --> 00:47:43,550
The coastline is much bigger than here.
740
00:47:45,730 --> 00:47:46,730
Right now?
741
00:47:47,530 --> 00:47:48,530
No.
742
00:47:57,990 --> 00:48:01,050
It's definitely a little forward. I'll
fall off the chair.
743
00:48:11,690 --> 00:48:12,890
We're still ordering.
744
00:48:13,570 --> 00:48:15,710
How about some French fries?
745
00:48:22,070 --> 00:48:22,890
Followed
746
00:48:22,890 --> 00:48:31,330
by
747
00:48:31,330 --> 00:48:33,170
banana cream fries.
748
00:48:51,070 --> 00:48:52,610
Really need so much.
749
00:48:54,910 --> 00:48:57,750
Ham and cheese.
750
00:49:02,770 --> 00:49:03,770
Mayonnaise.
751
00:49:05,090 --> 00:49:06,090
Fresh.
752
00:49:10,230 --> 00:49:12,890
New York style.
753
00:49:35,500 --> 00:49:38,980
Remember when you told me you couldn't
kiss people you were in love with?
754
00:49:42,220 --> 00:49:43,760
Again. Again.
755
00:49:45,070 --> 00:49:48,710
After all, it's going to take another
five minutes for those french fries to
756
00:49:48,710 --> 00:49:50,590
cooked, and what am I going to do in the
meantime?
757
00:49:52,850 --> 00:49:54,290
Yeah, they really mean so much.
758
00:49:57,790 --> 00:49:58,790
Salmon cheese.
759
00:50:00,270 --> 00:50:01,270
Roast beans.
760
00:50:03,670 --> 00:50:04,910
And what's your name?
761
00:50:06,510 --> 00:50:08,810
That takes a few minutes.
762
00:50:14,730 --> 00:50:21,470
And cut off
763
00:50:21,470 --> 00:50:22,630
your beard and mustache.
764
00:52:58,010 --> 00:52:59,290
I think I'll quit.
765
00:53:00,650 --> 00:53:04,470
I found something better to do than
work. I have to go to the bathroom.
766
00:55:24,310 --> 00:55:27,110
I know.
767
00:56:02,790 --> 00:56:03,790
Yeah,
768
00:56:07,210 --> 00:56:11,110
I'd like to feel at home wherever I
work. Otherwise, I just can't make it
769
00:56:11,110 --> 00:56:16,750
because, you know, it's too much like a
job.
770
00:56:17,350 --> 00:56:21,730
But about the guitar, I wouldn't worry
about it. No one will know the
771
00:56:21,730 --> 00:56:26,870
difference. They won't even know whether
it's a guitar, a ukulele, an auto harp,
772
00:56:26,930 --> 00:56:28,370
or the inside of a piano.
773
00:56:29,640 --> 00:56:31,300
Just go right ahead and play.
774
00:56:31,760 --> 00:56:33,500
I think it sounds lovely.
775
00:56:33,840 --> 00:56:35,500
I don't know anything about it either.
776
00:56:38,740 --> 00:56:41,580
Why don't you play Billy Joe?
777
00:56:44,260 --> 00:56:46,260
Who has to work in that cafe?
778
00:57:01,550 --> 00:57:04,230
She hoped she had his neck upon my knee.
779
00:57:04,750 --> 00:57:06,210
I held my breath.
780
00:57:31,280 --> 00:57:32,340
Go upstairs for a minute.
781
00:57:36,100 --> 00:57:38,760
It's so out of key, I think. Oh, it
doesn't matter.
782
00:57:39,300 --> 00:57:41,720
I played the piano for 14 years out of
key.
783
00:57:44,780 --> 00:57:47,460
My father played the violin.
784
00:57:47,840 --> 00:57:51,560
My father had 84 violins.
785
00:57:52,400 --> 00:57:56,020
He collapsed them. They're strung across
the ceiling on a string, and every once
786
00:57:56,020 --> 00:57:57,080
in a while the string breaks.
787
00:57:58,589 --> 00:58:02,670
Plus in all the closets, you step on a
violin when you're walking to get out
788
00:58:02,670 --> 00:58:03,670
your dress.
789
00:58:03,970 --> 00:58:05,850
It's all true. I'm not making it up.
790
00:58:06,490 --> 00:58:07,990
What's price tags on them?
791
00:58:08,790 --> 00:58:12,550
He stands in the living room playing the
violin while we sit in the kitchen and
792
00:58:12,550 --> 00:58:16,010
he says, which one sounds the best? The
one that sounds the best gets a $2 ,000
793
00:58:16,010 --> 00:58:19,750
price tag. The next one gets a $1 ,000
and the third gets a $500.
794
00:58:20,590 --> 00:58:23,670
So finally someone came to buy them and
he said they're not for sale.
795
00:58:25,170 --> 00:58:26,930
And then he oils them. No.
796
00:58:32,040 --> 00:58:34,340
You don't have any milkshake?
797
00:58:36,300 --> 00:58:39,700
How about a little slime instead? Open
your mouth.
798
00:58:50,920 --> 00:58:54,220
I'm happy without ordering, my dear.
799
00:58:54,800 --> 00:58:56,300
I'm picking up space.
800
00:58:57,870 --> 00:58:58,990
We do have a minimum.
801
00:59:01,790 --> 00:59:03,510
How about a cup of coffee?
802
00:59:07,090 --> 00:59:13,710
Then you'll also have to order a butter
-covered bun, and that will make it
803
00:59:13,710 --> 00:59:15,510
65 cents minimum.
804
00:59:17,310 --> 00:59:20,230
You know, I mean, I only work here. I
don't make the laws.
805
00:59:21,950 --> 00:59:22,950
All right?
806
00:59:23,710 --> 00:59:26,750
How about you take the expense?
807
00:59:27,920 --> 00:59:31,340
While you're eating his sandwich, you
have to have your own sandwich.
808
00:59:31,660 --> 00:59:35,860
Well, I'll have the sandwich and... Is
that all right with you?
809
00:59:37,420 --> 00:59:40,580
You know, boys, I mean... I'd like a
glass of wine.
810
00:59:41,260 --> 00:59:47,080
You know, I'd let you sit here all day
and play chess, but... That's what
811
00:59:47,080 --> 00:59:48,080
everybody says.
812
00:59:49,320 --> 00:59:52,120
I have to answer the telephone.
813
00:59:53,560 --> 00:59:54,560
Wine, right.
814
01:01:54,319 --> 01:01:55,920
I'll take
815
01:01:55,920 --> 01:02:04,360
a
816
01:02:04,360 --> 01:02:05,960
little milk for that coffee
817
01:02:14,950 --> 01:02:18,470
Maybe this is coffee that you're... Oh,
how about some Sanka?
818
01:02:20,250 --> 01:02:24,850
How about some Sanka? I know how to make
that.
819
01:02:25,770 --> 01:02:26,770
Oh, that's okay.
820
01:02:27,010 --> 01:02:28,010
Okay.
821
01:02:28,450 --> 01:02:29,990
Why don't you sit down?
822
01:02:31,870 --> 01:02:34,510
...in his downtown New York office.
823
01:02:35,880 --> 01:02:40,640
Of course, that got me out of gym, you
know. I went and said, Mother, I've
824
01:02:40,640 --> 01:02:41,860
decided that... What do you want to do?
825
01:02:42,420 --> 01:02:44,920
Well, I don't know. Oh, I know what it
was getting me out of. St.
826
01:02:45,140 --> 01:02:48,320
Patrick's Day practice. We had to be in
the St. Patrick's Day parade and
827
01:02:48,320 --> 01:02:52,320
practice up and down, up and down, up
and down, so we'd win the cup. We won it
828
01:02:52,320 --> 01:02:56,060
every year in caps and gowns and high
heels, even if it was raining.
829
01:02:57,089 --> 01:03:01,230
So we'd go prancing up and down those
courtyards and caps and downs for two
830
01:03:01,230 --> 01:03:05,430
weeks before the parade. Up and down, up
and down. Whether you had blisters,
831
01:03:05,550 --> 01:03:08,590
calluses, fallen arches, it didn't
matter. Up and down.
832
01:03:09,010 --> 01:03:14,170
So the first thing I tried getting out
of it was I scraped my knee on purpose.
833
01:03:14,170 --> 01:03:17,530
tripped over the curb, scraped my knee,
ground some glass in it, got some blood
834
01:03:17,530 --> 01:03:21,210
going, wrapped a band -aid, poured some
ketchup on it, and went to the head nun.
835
01:03:21,770 --> 01:03:25,190
And said, how can I march? Look at this
knee. She said, oh dear, a little
836
01:03:25,190 --> 01:03:28,670
scratch. Never hurt anybody. Why? Look
at our soldiers fighting.
837
01:03:28,890 --> 01:03:29,890
They go on.
838
01:03:30,490 --> 01:03:33,330
So I said, that's not going to do it.
I've got to turn to religion.
839
01:03:33,970 --> 01:03:36,950
So I said, look, I really think I want
to become a nun.
840
01:03:37,650 --> 01:03:40,950
And I'm going to go down and see Fulton
Sheen. And they said, oh, how wonderful.
841
01:03:41,110 --> 01:03:44,150
Oh, dear. Oh, we're so happy. We'd love
to have you in the community.
842
01:03:45,150 --> 01:03:48,630
So I went all the way down to see Fulton
Sheen. And when I got there, he was
843
01:03:48,630 --> 01:03:49,630
sitting.
844
01:03:49,950 --> 01:03:50,950
Get this.
845
01:03:51,850 --> 01:03:57,750
wall -to -wall carpeting, gold drapes
with the sunlight filtering through. You
846
01:03:57,750 --> 01:03:59,970
know, he knew backlighting was
important.
847
01:04:00,750 --> 01:04:05,570
Backlighting on him, sitting there like
this, with his cape over his shoulder.
848
01:04:05,750 --> 01:04:12,450
And then he'd wait until I got two feet
from him, and he swept his
849
01:04:12,450 --> 01:04:13,450
cape aside.
850
01:04:13,610 --> 01:04:15,010
He had big snatches.
851
01:04:16,930 --> 01:04:19,810
What can I do for you, my child?
852
01:04:21,040 --> 01:04:24,840
And I said, well, Bishop, I think I'd
like to become a nun.
853
01:04:25,120 --> 01:04:29,120
And he took one look at me and said,
forget it.
854
01:04:30,220 --> 01:04:31,520
Not for you.
855
01:04:33,180 --> 01:04:35,980
What else can you do besides pray?
856
01:04:36,920 --> 01:04:39,620
And I said, well, answer the phone,
please.
857
01:04:39,980 --> 01:04:40,980
Once again.
858
01:04:41,230 --> 01:04:45,930
And, you know, now he's become a great
left -wing liberal fighter for immediate
859
01:04:45,930 --> 01:04:51,050
withdrawal from Vietnam and giving
underground masses in Buffalo. They
860
01:04:51,190 --> 01:04:53,870
Buffalo, speaking of that, you know what
they do?
861
01:04:54,270 --> 01:04:58,570
When the priests got a little out of
hand, they demote them to further and
862
01:04:58,570 --> 01:05:01,950
further north, the colder it gets. They
think that'll take care of all their sex
863
01:05:01,950 --> 01:05:02,950
problems, I guess.
864
01:05:03,170 --> 01:05:07,770
Well, we had this family friend priest
who was constantly getting demoted. They
865
01:05:07,770 --> 01:05:11,770
had him practically in the U. con by the
time I was having an affair with one of
866
01:05:11,770 --> 01:05:15,450
our younger parishioners and of course
he wouldn't think of such a thing they
867
01:05:15,450 --> 01:05:18,090
were just subconsciously frustrated
jealous etc.
868
01:05:18,410 --> 01:05:21,850
Well the truth of the matter was he was
having affairs with his younger
869
01:05:21,850 --> 01:05:28,790
parishioners because one night at
midnight he said my father's
870
01:05:28,790 --> 01:05:31,130
house up in the woods he said let's take
a little walk.
871
01:05:32,240 --> 01:05:36,280
So we took a little walk, and we got out
in the woods, and he had his hand sort
872
01:05:36,280 --> 01:05:39,900
of on the smile of my back, and it kept
getting down a little lower and a little
873
01:05:39,900 --> 01:05:44,460
lower. And he said, my dear, when was
the last time you held on a job?
874
01:05:45,720 --> 01:05:50,120
And I said, oh, I guess it was about six
months ago. And he said, why aren't you
875
01:05:50,120 --> 01:05:54,740
working? And I said, well, I met this
terrific man, and I just moved right in
876
01:05:54,740 --> 01:05:57,780
with him when I found he had a little
bit of money, and I haven't worked
877
01:05:57,980 --> 01:06:01,320
And he said, what do you do together?
What do you do?
878
01:06:03,120 --> 01:06:04,680
Do you ever go down on him?
879
01:06:04,880 --> 01:06:09,560
No. I swear I'm telling you the truth. I
swear to God I'm telling you the truth.
880
01:06:09,580 --> 01:06:10,058
A priest?
881
01:06:10,060 --> 01:06:11,520
Yes, a priest. Are you serious? I'm
serious.
882
01:06:11,860 --> 01:06:15,620
Ordained? No, he didn't actually say go
down. He said oral intercourse. Yeah,
883
01:06:15,640 --> 01:06:16,640
right. Well, that's good.
884
01:06:16,740 --> 01:06:20,600
Yeah, ordained, ordained, ordained for
20 years.
885
01:06:20,840 --> 01:06:23,200
And I said, oh, yes, we do just
everything.
886
01:06:23,880 --> 01:06:28,780
And he said, oh, I feel like you're my
younger daughter. I brought you up. I've
887
01:06:28,780 --> 01:06:29,780
known you since you were seven.
888
01:06:30,140 --> 01:06:32,060
Meanwhile, he had his hand pinching my
ass.
889
01:06:32,260 --> 01:06:37,060
And then he got me into this big clinch.
He started kissing me. Well, before I
890
01:06:37,060 --> 01:06:39,260
knew it, his tongue was halfway down my
throat.
891
01:06:39,540 --> 01:06:41,300
And I said, this isn't happening.
892
01:06:41,540 --> 01:06:44,500
I mean, it couldn't be. It couldn't be
happening. I'm hallucinating.
893
01:06:44,720 --> 01:06:48,440
And I didn't know what to do. If I said
stop, I was admitting it was happening.
894
01:06:48,520 --> 01:06:52,480
And if I didn't say anything, we'd be in
the fallen leaves in two seconds.
895
01:06:52,960 --> 01:06:56,260
So I just stayed there with the tongue
going farther and farther down. And
896
01:06:56,260 --> 01:06:57,260
finally, he's going.
897
01:06:57,850 --> 01:07:01,570
And he said, we've got to go back to the
house. I'm getting excited. I'm getting
898
01:07:01,570 --> 01:07:05,630
excited. And I said, you are getting
excited. What about me?
899
01:07:06,630 --> 01:07:11,590
So we got back to the house. He was also
a bit of an alcoholic.
900
01:07:12,330 --> 01:07:14,590
And it was a big house, right? Great big
house.
901
01:07:15,150 --> 01:07:18,870
Brought me into the pantry. Got my other
sister. Sat us down on the floor, one
902
01:07:18,870 --> 01:07:21,190
on each knee, swigging down the whiskey.
903
01:07:21,550 --> 01:07:22,550
Irish.
904
01:07:23,110 --> 01:07:24,110
Irish.
905
01:07:25,049 --> 01:07:29,810
and would pinch each one of us in the
ass, one by one, in between drinks. And
906
01:07:29,810 --> 01:07:31,830
were all squealing and shrieking.
907
01:07:32,610 --> 01:07:34,910
Oh, so many stories about this priest.
908
01:07:35,130 --> 01:07:36,650
And there's another one coming up.
909
01:07:37,330 --> 01:07:42,530
And we hear my mother's voice from the
top of the stairs saying, Come to bed!
910
01:07:42,990 --> 01:07:43,990
Come to bed!
911
01:07:44,210 --> 01:07:48,090
Lights out! Lights out! So we said, Come
on, Father, we've got to go to bed. So
912
01:07:48,090 --> 01:07:51,430
we dragged him up off the pantry floor.
You get so much personal attention.
913
01:07:51,710 --> 01:07:52,710
That's terrific.
914
01:07:54,320 --> 01:07:55,320
That's really terrific.
915
01:07:55,400 --> 01:07:58,180
That's right. Like a lot of people go
through their whole life and they don't
916
01:07:58,180 --> 01:08:02,160
get any attention. Here you are getting
all this experience from a priest, which
917
01:08:02,160 --> 01:08:03,160
I think is really beautiful.
918
01:08:04,180 --> 01:08:07,280
That's why they brought the priest in.
You know, they had so many kids, they
919
01:08:07,280 --> 01:08:08,440
couldn't give us all attention.
920
01:08:08,720 --> 01:08:13,260
So they brought the clergy in to take up
the gap, the credibility gap.
921
01:08:15,040 --> 01:08:19,260
That's what Johnson should have, a few
priests around. Yeah, right. I believe
922
01:08:19,260 --> 01:08:23,580
that. So anyway, I successfully, thought
I successfully.
923
01:08:24,160 --> 01:08:25,160
You know what you did?
924
01:08:25,720 --> 01:08:29,500
He got me behind the drapes and begged
me to give him a goodnight kiss.
925
01:08:30,020 --> 01:08:30,398
Oh, well.
926
01:08:30,399 --> 01:08:33,819
Well, she shouldn't have been surprised,
because you know what happened about
927
01:08:33,819 --> 01:08:35,420
eight years ago?
928
01:08:37,120 --> 01:08:41,880
Well, my sister and this priest were
like this all the time, and my mother
929
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:43,500
always worried about their relationship.
930
01:08:44,020 --> 01:08:47,300
And my sister would say, Oh, Mother's
such a creep. You know, we're just
931
01:08:47,300 --> 01:08:50,920
friends. I mean, after all, he's a
priest. He grew up with my mother.
932
01:08:52,040 --> 01:08:56,439
He left his boat to retrieve a motor. He
pulled a motor up out of the bottom of
933
01:08:56,439 --> 01:08:57,979
the Savior motor.
934
01:08:59,500 --> 01:09:03,359
And he had the cast on his back, and he
came in, and he's standing at the bottom
935
01:09:03,359 --> 01:09:05,479
of the stairs on a Persian throw rug.
936
01:09:05,880 --> 01:09:06,880
And he says,
937
01:09:08,020 --> 01:09:09,899
Sheila! Sheila!
938
01:09:11,460 --> 01:09:12,640
My sister Sheila.
939
01:09:13,300 --> 01:09:15,160
So down the stairs she comes.
940
01:09:15,600 --> 01:09:18,979
She was his cheerleader, his head
cheerleader. You know, they did
941
01:09:18,979 --> 01:09:21,220
together. At the top of the stairs, and
he says,
942
01:09:22,300 --> 01:09:23,300
Jump!
943
01:09:23,520 --> 01:09:27,500
So she jumps into his arms down the
whole flight of stairs. The rug goes out
944
01:09:27,500 --> 01:09:31,500
from under him. She lands on top of him
on the floor, and the next -door
945
01:09:31,500 --> 01:09:35,899
neighbor at that moment opened the door,
came in the house, took one look, and
946
01:09:35,899 --> 01:09:36,899
went, Ah!
947
01:09:37,600 --> 01:09:38,600
Ah!
948
01:09:39,380 --> 01:09:42,520
Father! And she ran away and spread the
rumors through the whole neighborhood
949
01:09:42,520 --> 01:09:45,660
that the priest and my sister were
making it on the living room floor.
950
01:09:46,760 --> 01:09:51,010
Well. My sister, this really upset her.
She said, don't you dare tell mother.
951
01:09:51,109 --> 01:09:53,109
She's already suspicious enough.
952
01:09:54,450 --> 01:09:58,710
Don't tell her a word about father.
953
01:09:59,070 --> 01:10:02,510
He wants to go to Africa to save souls
on a large scale.
954
01:10:04,130 --> 01:10:09,050
He's tired of this petty soul scale. He
wants to go down there and convert them
955
01:10:09,050 --> 01:10:15,810
all, all the pagans, all those pagan
Africans to the true Catholic Christian
956
01:10:15,810 --> 01:10:16,830
way of life.
957
01:10:17,430 --> 01:10:22,050
clean up their sex lives and so on, get
them all married properly.
958
01:10:22,910 --> 01:10:27,210
Of course, he probably realizes that
he'll have very far South Africa, and
959
01:10:27,210 --> 01:10:29,230
take him a long while to get back up to
Canada.
960
01:10:31,190 --> 01:10:35,650
So by the time he starts his career all
over again, to get back up to Canada,
961
01:10:35,670 --> 01:10:39,930
it'll take at least 10 years of going
from one parish to another, warmer
962
01:10:39,930 --> 01:10:43,470
climate, a little bit colder, a little
bit colder, a little bit. And by that
963
01:10:43,470 --> 01:10:45,690
time, he'll be impotent, so there won't
be any problems.
964
01:10:46,390 --> 01:10:47,390
I'll be so old.
965
01:10:51,570 --> 01:10:54,370
Mother, my memoirs of the Catholic
girlhood.
966
01:10:55,290 --> 01:10:59,530
Much better than Mary McCarthy's. Would
you like to hear some more? Yes.
967
01:11:00,610 --> 01:11:02,650
Mother, with the case of the lesbian
nun.
968
01:11:04,570 --> 01:11:10,050
More heterosexuality within the church
than outside of the church. And ever
969
01:11:10,050 --> 01:11:11,190
since I left the church.
970
01:11:12,010 --> 01:11:15,730
All I've run into are a bunch of fags,
at least in the church there were all
971
01:11:15,730 --> 01:11:16,730
those horny priests.
972
01:11:17,550 --> 01:11:22,490
You know, you were always sure of a good
lay, but now things are
973
01:11:22,490 --> 01:11:25,370
rather frustrating.
974
01:11:26,130 --> 01:11:31,390
My dear, I don't know where the water
is. I'm new here. How about a Coke
975
01:11:31,390 --> 01:11:33,310
instead? A root beer?
976
01:11:46,000 --> 01:11:49,660
Taylor, love, I hear you have a
marvelous voice. I do.
977
01:11:49,980 --> 01:11:52,200
Will you sing something for me?
978
01:11:52,640 --> 01:11:56,000
Well, if I could have another root beer.
979
01:11:57,480 --> 01:11:58,520
Or gin.
980
01:12:00,240 --> 01:12:03,420
Manhattan. I'll give you something
special.
981
01:12:03,720 --> 01:12:10,540
I'll see if this makes my warbler
982
01:12:10,540 --> 01:12:11,540
slick.
983
01:12:14,600 --> 01:12:16,420
Will you imitate a bird for me first?
984
01:12:18,460 --> 01:12:20,260
More. That's enough.
985
01:12:23,440 --> 01:12:24,620
Oh, that's marvelous.
986
01:12:27,860 --> 01:12:33,180
I'll sing just the one little number
while I'm reading the menu.
987
01:12:35,960 --> 01:12:37,780
Of course.
988
01:12:38,200 --> 01:12:43,300
Tea is often hard to do when it seems...
989
01:12:43,680 --> 01:12:45,600
Happiness is gone.
990
01:12:46,540 --> 01:12:53,320
You've got to learn to hide your tears
and tell your
991
01:12:53,320 --> 01:12:55,620
heart life must go on.
992
01:12:57,700 --> 01:12:58,980
One more melody.
993
01:12:59,240 --> 01:13:05,860
You've got to learn to leave the table
when love's no longer being served.
994
01:13:07,500 --> 01:13:10,900
To show everybody that you're able.
995
01:13:11,850 --> 01:13:14,090
To leave without saying a word.
996
01:13:16,470 --> 01:13:21,650
You've got to learn to hide your
sorrows.
997
01:13:26,650 --> 01:13:27,650
Word.
998
01:13:28,310 --> 01:13:35,190
You've got to learn to hide your sorrows
and go on living
999
01:13:35,190 --> 01:13:36,870
as before.
1000
01:13:37,790 --> 01:13:40,990
What? Good is thinking of tomorrow.
1001
01:13:43,190 --> 01:13:46,910
Who knows what it may have in store?
1002
01:13:48,090 --> 01:13:52,750
You've got to learn to trust with your
heart.
1003
01:13:53,610 --> 01:14:00,190
You've got to learn from a hard
experience and listen
1004
01:14:00,190 --> 01:14:07,070
to advice and promise and learn
1005
01:14:07,070 --> 01:14:08,070
to live.
1006
01:14:09,200 --> 01:14:11,560
With a broken heart.
1007
01:14:13,900 --> 01:14:16,240
Haven't I heard the lyrics before?
1008
01:14:16,940 --> 01:14:19,960
And I also want a sandwich on rice.
1009
01:14:21,160 --> 01:14:27,480
A little more gin in my root beer. But I
told you we don't have a liquor
1010
01:14:27,480 --> 01:14:32,960
license. Well, under the bottom shelf is
your liquor license, baby.
1011
01:14:34,000 --> 01:14:35,400
This isn't 1920.
1012
01:14:37,129 --> 01:14:41,290
It's 1937 and depression is over.
1013
01:14:41,510 --> 01:14:44,910
I know, but we have new CDs now. We have
other things.
1014
01:14:45,450 --> 01:14:46,610
Like priests?
1015
01:14:47,010 --> 01:14:50,110
Well, we have priests and we have drugs.
1016
01:14:51,650 --> 01:14:54,410
Just give me some no -dodes.
1017
01:14:54,650 --> 01:14:56,290
No -dodes? Yeah.
1018
01:14:56,790 --> 01:14:58,010
What have you got?
1019
01:14:58,510 --> 01:15:01,470
Oh, we have a few marigold seeds.
1020
01:15:02,940 --> 01:15:06,980
Three marigolds, please. How about a
little zinnia? No doughs.
1021
01:15:07,460 --> 01:15:10,480
No doughs, marigolds, and zinnia mixed
together.
1022
01:15:10,760 --> 01:15:14,080
No, I'll never take more than two things
at once.
1023
01:15:14,500 --> 01:15:17,280
All right, then we'll do what? No doughs
and marigolds?
1024
01:15:17,580 --> 01:15:19,440
No doughs and zinnia, I think.
1025
01:15:19,820 --> 01:15:21,080
Mixed with a little Coke?
1026
01:15:21,860 --> 01:15:22,960
No, water.
1027
01:15:23,400 --> 01:15:24,400
Water?
1028
01:15:24,660 --> 01:15:26,600
Water. Where's the water?
1029
01:15:27,140 --> 01:15:29,040
I'd like to have some water, too. Water.
1030
01:15:30,440 --> 01:15:31,440
Zinnia.
1031
01:15:31,900 --> 01:15:35,860
Anything that grows underground is some
drug.
1032
01:15:38,900 --> 01:15:41,440
That's very clever.
1033
01:15:41,980 --> 01:15:43,160
I thought so.
1034
01:15:44,760 --> 01:15:49,440
I read a book where they put all the
dope hanging on the wall with the
1035
01:15:49,640 --> 01:15:53,240
And when the police came and said, where
is the dope?
1036
01:15:54,000 --> 01:15:57,880
And who wrote you that letter or
something?
1037
01:16:01,839 --> 01:16:04,120
No, thank you. Just give me the coat.
1038
01:16:07,200 --> 01:16:14,040
My tour said not to
1039
01:16:14,040 --> 01:16:17,380
go too into the village because of
violence.
1040
01:16:18,900 --> 01:16:19,900
Well,
1041
01:16:20,520 --> 01:16:23,400
haven't you ever read about it, though,
and everything?
1042
01:16:25,540 --> 01:16:28,240
You didn't read about the Greenwich
Village?
1043
01:16:31,020 --> 01:16:35,540
And she said, getting paid, getting
paid, how much money are you making?
1044
01:16:36,260 --> 01:16:41,060
You might as well become a hippie and
live in a hut in New Mexico. And she
1045
01:16:41,160 --> 01:16:43,700
hmm, don't you read the papers?
1046
01:16:44,260 --> 01:16:48,260
Hippies are dead, passe, finished, gone,
over with.
1047
01:16:48,660 --> 01:16:50,200
What are you, some kind of a square?
1048
01:16:51,880 --> 01:16:54,300
She seems the same number my father is.
1049
01:16:56,520 --> 01:16:59,100
Maybe they should get together. But the
hippies aren't dead.
1050
01:17:00,590 --> 01:17:05,650
The hippies are not dead. Because I saw
a photograph, an exhibition just done a
1051
01:17:05,650 --> 01:17:11,910
month ago, and there were thousands of
people with their garments, long clothes
1052
01:17:11,910 --> 01:17:12,910
and everything.
1053
01:17:13,990 --> 01:17:14,990
Where?
1054
01:17:15,690 --> 01:17:19,310
In some enormous park in some big city.
1055
01:17:19,530 --> 01:17:22,810
And it wasn't New York or Los Angeles.
1056
01:17:24,220 --> 01:17:28,600
Some Midwestern milkweed. Milkweed. You
know, during the war, they used to hang
1057
01:17:28,600 --> 01:17:34,660
milkweed out on lines to dry to sell for
parachutes all through the country and
1058
01:17:34,660 --> 01:17:35,680
upstate New York.
1059
01:17:36,360 --> 01:17:37,600
Did you ever see that?
1060
01:17:38,260 --> 01:17:42,380
Wow. That's what thistle -down is. Isn't
that something that thistle -down makes
1061
01:17:42,380 --> 01:17:46,420
parachutes, and a thistle -down is like
a parachute anyway?
1062
01:17:46,720 --> 01:17:47,740
And it's the only good down.
1063
01:17:48,420 --> 01:17:51,380
That's what they're going to call a
hippie thistle -down.
1064
01:17:51,760 --> 01:17:55,080
Because they sprout winter and... Sprout
in the winter.
1065
01:17:55,440 --> 01:18:00,100
Well, listen, I'm way outside the
village, according to my tour, and I saw
1066
01:18:00,100 --> 01:18:01,840
eight hippies coming in here.
1067
01:18:02,080 --> 01:18:06,840
There's a hippie. I'm saying it again. I
was in Fidel Castro's dictionary.
1068
01:18:07,100 --> 01:18:08,100
Say that again.
1069
01:18:11,820 --> 01:18:18,680
I'll tell your sister -in -law's
husband's fiancé that I made it with the
1070
01:18:18,680 --> 01:18:20,780
number one of Cuba.
1071
01:18:21,880 --> 01:18:22,880
Big, big one.
1072
01:18:23,140 --> 01:18:25,940
Well, my dear, I was engaged to Batista.
1073
01:18:26,820 --> 01:18:28,420
Is he dead?
1074
01:18:29,960 --> 01:18:32,180
You don't even know of your former
husband?
1075
01:18:33,460 --> 01:18:37,660
No, but I found a hippie who might know.
Because I saw a buck. He caught a buck.
1076
01:18:37,920 --> 01:18:39,420
He's either a cop or a hippie.
1077
01:18:39,820 --> 01:18:40,920
You know what he did?
1078
01:18:41,220 --> 01:18:43,280
You know what he did to some other
friends of mine?
1079
01:18:43,860 --> 01:18:44,860
Who?
1080
01:18:45,060 --> 01:18:46,940
Batista. Oh, Batista?
1081
01:18:47,840 --> 01:18:49,640
Yeah, he took, uh...
1082
01:18:49,960 --> 01:18:55,340
One of their fiancés dropped him on a
table and put his girlfriend in front of
1083
01:18:55,340 --> 01:19:01,260
him and said, make him talk, make him
talk, because if he doesn't talk, we're
1084
01:19:01,260 --> 01:19:04,280
going to castrate him. And he wouldn't
talk, so they cut off his balls right
1085
01:19:04,280 --> 01:19:09,880
there in front of him. To the United
States and talked about that rotten
1086
01:19:10,100 --> 01:19:11,940
Our cousin knew he was a communist.
1087
01:19:12,140 --> 01:19:14,660
You would think Castro would do the
castrate.
1088
01:19:17,100 --> 01:19:19,940
Yeah, why did you leave Cuba? Did they
take away your father's mansion?
1089
01:19:20,400 --> 01:19:24,980
Because... Because Castro's father was
Dr.
1090
01:19:25,320 --> 01:19:29,080
Castro, who performed... performed
operations.
1091
01:19:29,680 --> 01:19:34,380
Well, were you with Castro before or
always against? Or either... Oh,
1092
01:19:35,000 --> 01:19:37,840
Louie, quit burping.
1093
01:19:39,520 --> 01:19:44,600
Where? Look what happened to him in the
sugar can. Look at this. Oh, he's a
1094
01:19:44,600 --> 01:19:46,780
hippie. Look at it. No, it's not.
1095
01:19:47,040 --> 01:19:49,320
There's still left. I told Time
Magazine.
1096
01:19:50,480 --> 01:19:51,920
Do they know about you?
1097
01:19:52,380 --> 01:19:56,960
No. At first, do they know about you?
He's a mixture, a Sierra Bandit and a
1098
01:19:57,060 --> 01:19:58,060
uh, hip mate.
1099
01:19:58,340 --> 01:20:00,900
Hip, hippie. Don't you dare.
1100
01:20:01,280 --> 01:20:02,280
Do you hit me?
1101
01:20:03,520 --> 01:20:07,600
I think he needs some flowers in his
hair to go along with everything else.
1102
01:20:07,600 --> 01:20:08,459
they come.
1103
01:20:08,460 --> 01:20:09,580
Oh, well.
1104
01:20:10,260 --> 01:20:11,720
It'll work. Let's pretend.
1105
01:20:13,360 --> 01:20:14,360
Oh, what?
1106
01:20:16,270 --> 01:20:20,310
Do I have to pay extra? I have to tell
him that there's a service charge for
1107
01:20:20,310 --> 01:20:21,310
pinching.
1108
01:20:21,910 --> 01:20:25,650
Well, he's kind of... Out of the bill.
1109
01:20:27,710 --> 01:20:28,710
He's America.
1110
01:20:29,010 --> 01:20:31,450
We don't touch, we just look.
1111
01:20:31,830 --> 01:20:33,510
Did you help overthrow the government?
1112
01:20:34,010 --> 01:20:36,270
Did you help overthrow? Yeah.
1113
01:20:36,770 --> 01:20:37,770
What did you overthrow?
1114
01:20:38,370 --> 01:20:40,650
Overthrew my cast.
1115
01:20:42,870 --> 01:20:43,890
Your cast?
1116
01:20:44,430 --> 01:20:48,430
Yes. I was going into a cast society.
You had a cast in your arm? I was going
1117
01:20:48,430 --> 01:20:49,590
into a cast society.
1118
01:20:50,370 --> 01:20:51,810
Oh, you oversaw it. Yeah.
1119
01:20:53,030 --> 01:20:54,430
Where did you do that?
1120
01:20:54,710 --> 01:20:55,710
Right here.
1121
01:20:55,910 --> 01:20:59,730
Because I just come from Ghost Point,
and it's all that. I got news for you.
1122
01:21:00,310 --> 01:21:01,470
Dead on anything.
1123
01:21:01,690 --> 01:21:08,550
I mean, I walked down here from 82nd
Street, and it wasn't until I
1124
01:21:08,550 --> 01:21:10,390
got on this block that I began.
1125
01:21:10,990 --> 01:21:14,570
Seeing different colors. Otherwise it
was all black boots.
1126
01:21:14,870 --> 01:21:16,670
I'm part of the American Indian.
1127
01:21:17,310 --> 01:21:24,150
That's what they all say. My father's
Chickasaw Indian.
1128
01:21:30,840 --> 01:21:35,940
They run naked through the woods and put
flowers in their hair, but not in the
1129
01:21:35,940 --> 01:21:36,940
fall.
1130
01:21:37,580 --> 01:21:38,800
I mean, it's October now.
1131
01:21:39,080 --> 01:21:40,360
I got news for you.
1132
01:21:40,960 --> 01:21:41,960
Oh,
1133
01:21:42,500 --> 01:21:45,640
the Russians in Canada do it in the
winter, though.
1134
01:21:45,940 --> 01:21:48,600
But they shot them. They're shooting
most of them.
1135
01:21:48,820 --> 01:21:49,880
They shouldn't.
1136
01:21:50,320 --> 01:21:51,259
I know.
1137
01:21:51,260 --> 01:21:55,960
Because when you get naked all year
round... All the mountains do is pass
1138
01:21:55,960 --> 01:22:00,660
traffic. You get high because all the
blood comes to your skin like with
1139
01:22:00,880 --> 01:22:06,660
Right. Is that why Sesame Biotic died? I
mean, if you're being castrated or
1140
01:22:06,660 --> 01:22:09,360
anything and you want to... I was born
in the Southwest during the Depression.
1141
01:22:09,860 --> 01:22:15,320
Oh, we were all born during the
Depression. We moved to California. I
1142
01:22:15,320 --> 01:22:19,120
during the height of the boom.
1143
01:22:20,320 --> 01:22:22,860
My mother told me that I was a boom
baby.
1144
01:22:23,960 --> 01:22:29,060
You shouldn't tell anybody that you had
any Indian blood because you were a
1145
01:22:29,060 --> 01:22:30,060
thief.
1146
01:22:30,240 --> 01:22:32,040
Maybe I should sing my song again.
1147
01:22:33,120 --> 01:22:34,640
I would like for you to try it again.
1148
01:22:35,140 --> 01:22:36,140
Try it again?
1149
01:22:36,460 --> 01:22:37,660
With a little more melody.
1150
01:22:38,040 --> 01:22:39,500
A little, no.
1151
01:22:41,680 --> 01:22:45,680
Well, I'll sing it. We should order some
more. I mean, you know, I'm not going
1152
01:22:45,680 --> 01:22:49,420
to make any money if you just sit here
pinching me like that. No, stop it.
1153
01:22:49,800 --> 01:22:50,800
Can I have a Coke, Miss?
1154
01:22:51,880 --> 01:22:55,400
I do have a name, you know. Could we
have a root beer in the kitchen?
1155
01:22:56,600 --> 01:22:59,020
A root beer in the kitchen? My name
is...
1156
01:22:59,020 --> 01:23:05,940
Facing reality is
1157
01:23:05,940 --> 01:23:09,000
often hard to do.
1158
01:23:11,120 --> 01:23:13,120
Why don't you jump off in the back?
1159
01:23:13,480 --> 01:23:14,339
I wish I could.
1160
01:23:14,340 --> 01:23:17,660
Let's see a little... Your tattoo is
Mary Jane.
1161
01:23:20,910 --> 01:23:22,150
this restaurant is swinging.
1162
01:23:22,630 --> 01:23:24,130
No one allowed behind the back.
1163
01:23:26,730 --> 01:23:29,230
Let me get into it. Get right back out
there.
1164
01:23:30,090 --> 01:23:31,990
Oh, do that again.
1165
01:23:32,290 --> 01:23:33,450
Do that again. I love that.
1166
01:23:33,670 --> 01:23:36,690
It's such a nice view of your back when
you jump over.
1167
01:23:37,150 --> 01:23:39,190
Just keep jumping back and forth.
1168
01:23:40,150 --> 01:23:47,150
No, because I leave my outfit. Of course
I work here. I certainly wouldn't
1169
01:23:47,150 --> 01:23:49,250
be standing here if I weren't working
here.
1170
01:24:00,880 --> 01:24:04,220
You've got to learn to be the same.
1171
01:24:11,000 --> 01:24:16,700
Just sorrows and go on living as before.
1172
01:24:18,700 --> 01:24:22,540
What good is thinking of tomorrow?
1173
01:24:23,340 --> 01:24:25,720
Who knows what it meant?
1174
01:24:48,240 --> 01:24:50,420
And sometimes pay the price.
1175
01:24:52,280 --> 01:24:58,340
And learn to live with a broken
1176
01:24:58,340 --> 01:24:59,680
heart.
1177
01:25:17,930 --> 01:25:18,930
I'm an activist.
1178
01:25:19,190 --> 01:25:20,770
You kill people or what?
1179
01:25:21,050 --> 01:25:24,650
No, but I haven't dropped out. I'm still
part of society.
1180
01:25:26,090 --> 01:25:31,930
Well, I'm part of society. I'm from a
very wealthy suburb.
1181
01:25:33,270 --> 01:25:34,270
Where's that?
1182
01:25:34,350 --> 01:25:35,490
Grosse Pointe.
1183
01:25:37,590 --> 01:25:42,050
And, of course, I myself am not very
rich, but Grosse Pointe is.
1184
01:25:43,830 --> 01:25:46,690
So I just breathed in the air.
1185
01:25:48,720 --> 01:25:49,599
Gold dust.
1186
01:25:49,600 --> 01:25:55,540
Pure, all sheer gold dust. Anyway, by
activists, you're going to sit down and
1187
01:25:55,540 --> 01:25:57,820
then you're going to do more later or
something?
1188
01:25:58,200 --> 01:26:00,060
Well, I work right now for the
resistance.
1189
01:26:01,080 --> 01:26:02,980
I'm afraid to work for the resistance.
1190
01:26:03,920 --> 01:26:08,860
I go down to the demonstration. I went
down to the draft card burning at Foley
1191
01:26:08,860 --> 01:26:09,860
Square.
1192
01:26:12,020 --> 01:26:16,100
And I walked around once. But I don't
like walking around in circles and
1193
01:26:16,100 --> 01:26:17,100
because I get bored.
1194
01:26:18,030 --> 01:26:22,650
I gave up weightlifting because you have
to keep repeating everything.
1195
01:26:23,290 --> 01:26:27,110
And so I just, I guess I am a dropout.
1196
01:26:29,270 --> 01:26:31,790
So I shouldn't, what should I do?
1197
01:26:32,530 --> 01:26:34,050
Well, do you have a drop card?
1198
01:26:35,750 --> 01:26:36,750
No.
1199
01:26:37,770 --> 01:26:44,750
I had one, but some hustler stole it
from me.
1200
01:26:44,770 --> 01:26:49,740
I mean, some soldier stole it. So I
guess that's the same as getting burned
1201
01:26:49,740 --> 01:26:51,000
it, or burning it.
1202
01:26:51,980 --> 01:26:53,520
Well, you're in the resistance too,
then.
1203
01:26:54,340 --> 01:26:57,900
Yes, they say I... They say it's a
wonder I'm still alive.
1204
01:26:59,160 --> 01:27:00,220
You know.
1205
01:27:04,240 --> 01:27:05,400
So what do you think?
1206
01:27:05,620 --> 01:27:11,000
San Francisco, whether they're very...
Is it more exciting there or what?
1207
01:27:11,460 --> 01:27:13,040
I've only been here a short time.
1208
01:27:13,380 --> 01:27:16,720
But I mean San Francisco. Oh, well, I
see you can't compare it.
1209
01:27:18,419 --> 01:27:21,200
Well, from what I read, it's war.
1210
01:27:22,320 --> 01:27:24,900
But in San Francisco, it's all drinking.
1211
01:27:25,480 --> 01:27:27,780
I mean, there's just so much wine.
1212
01:27:28,800 --> 01:27:30,240
They think they're French.
1213
01:27:31,820 --> 01:27:35,300
And they drink this terrible California
wine.
1214
01:27:35,740 --> 01:27:39,240
Yeah, and the resistance are trying to
stop the war in Vietnam.
1215
01:27:39,900 --> 01:27:44,420
And by doing so, we're having everyone
of draft age send back their draft cards
1216
01:27:44,420 --> 01:27:47,220
to the Selective Service System.
1217
01:27:47,630 --> 01:27:50,830
which is, of course, totalitarian, as
you know. How many people?
1218
01:27:51,110 --> 01:27:57,950
1 ,500 so far, but on December 4th,
there will be another turn in of cards.
1219
01:27:58,470 --> 01:28:02,910
And if you don't have a card, you can
send a letter to your senator or someone
1220
01:28:02,910 --> 01:28:04,590
saying that you support our move.
1221
01:28:05,050 --> 01:28:10,250
Now, that is aiding and abetting the
breaking of a law, which is punishable
1222
01:28:10,250 --> 01:28:13,310
10 years imprisonment or a $10 ,000
fine.
1223
01:28:13,790 --> 01:28:16,190
If you want to do something for your
country, then you can.
1224
01:28:17,890 --> 01:28:18,890
Ow! No.
1225
01:28:19,570 --> 01:28:20,730
It's painful, isn't it?
1226
01:28:20,970 --> 01:28:24,830
Well, yeah. What if I were hit by a
belly cover? And I'm so sensitive.
1227
01:28:25,690 --> 01:28:27,150
Besides, I have this fracture.
1228
01:28:27,510 --> 01:28:28,810
That's why I didn't go to Washington.
1229
01:28:29,090 --> 01:28:32,270
My head's already split right down the
whole thing here.
1230
01:28:32,870 --> 01:28:33,950
Did you get that in the war?
1231
01:28:34,510 --> 01:28:37,310
I got that in the war on the streets.
1232
01:28:39,410 --> 01:28:42,430
Well, we have to end all wars as soon as
we can. I know.
1233
01:28:44,630 --> 01:28:45,630
I know.
1234
01:28:45,900 --> 01:28:50,960
Do you see... Well, tell me more about
the resisting.
1235
01:28:51,940 --> 01:28:55,400
Well, it's just an organization of
people, as I say, who turn back their
1236
01:28:55,400 --> 01:28:59,980
cards and are willing to go to jail
rather than fight or serve. 1 ,500 is
1237
01:28:59,980 --> 01:29:02,000
very... 600 ,000 we can handle.
1238
01:29:03,140 --> 01:29:09,180
I think when in Washington those three,
they say three MPs joined the people, I
1239
01:29:09,180 --> 01:29:11,740
thought that was the most significant
thing of the whole.
1240
01:29:12,180 --> 01:29:13,620
One of them is still at large.
1241
01:29:14,080 --> 01:29:15,080
Oh, wonderful.
1242
01:29:15,790 --> 01:29:22,770
I mean, I don't want to come on or
anything, but I like to make love.
1243
01:29:22,890 --> 01:29:24,030
I don't just give flowers.
1244
01:29:28,130 --> 01:29:35,110
I give cancer, Leo, and I am, of course,
I suppose I'm
1245
01:29:35,110 --> 01:29:40,490
the worst kind because I'm terribly
happy that people are doing all this.
1246
01:29:40,490 --> 01:29:44,030
can help. Even if you don't have a draft
card, you can help by Norman Mailer.
1247
01:29:44,570 --> 01:29:50,450
Allen Ginsberg and other people have
signed a statement of resistance against
1248
01:29:50,450 --> 01:29:51,470
the illegitimate authority.
1249
01:29:51,790 --> 01:29:54,790
They're helping out in any way they can.
You can help out with money. You can
1250
01:29:54,790 --> 01:29:58,450
help out with time. You can help out
with, you know, joining our support
1251
01:29:58,450 --> 01:30:02,450
on the 4th when we turn back our draft
cards again.
1252
01:30:02,930 --> 01:30:08,770
This restaurant used to be a simple
mafia undercover joint. Now it's
1253
01:30:08,770 --> 01:30:11,690
goddamn demonstration protest.
1254
01:30:12,630 --> 01:30:13,630
Berkeley.
1255
01:30:14,499 --> 01:30:15,780
University type.
1256
01:30:16,100 --> 01:30:21,440
Because they're knocking on our door,
baby. The fascists and everything.
1257
01:30:21,800 --> 01:30:23,860
I don't have a restaurant anymore.
1258
01:30:24,080 --> 01:30:25,760
That's just for draftee.
1259
01:30:26,120 --> 01:30:32,480
Would you take a deserter into your
house and hide him from the law?
1260
01:30:32,680 --> 01:30:35,120
Yes, I'll do anything that's true.
1261
01:30:37,370 --> 01:30:40,510
Perhaps been smashed by the British
during the American Revolution. Now,
1262
01:30:40,510 --> 01:30:45,530
anything that happens and immediately,
because for me, the plan is difficult.
1263
01:30:46,290 --> 01:30:47,290
Well,
1264
01:30:47,530 --> 01:30:52,470
if I could get your address, perhaps I
could contact Dodger and other groups
1265
01:30:52,470 --> 01:30:54,850
tell them that you'll give them
hospitality.
1266
01:30:56,090 --> 01:30:59,710
Oh, I won't give this to anybody. We
need people who care, Taylor.
1267
01:31:00,390 --> 01:31:05,290
We don't want dropouts. We want people
who take an interest in this society and
1268
01:31:05,290 --> 01:31:06,290
who want to change it.
1269
01:31:06,750 --> 01:31:13,610
Well, yes, but I want someone beautiful
to live with.
1270
01:31:13,730 --> 01:31:16,290
Well, anyone who doesn't like war must
be beautiful.
1271
01:31:17,130 --> 01:31:18,130
Not necessarily.
1272
01:31:21,250 --> 01:31:23,690
Well, I mean, perhaps we could send you
pictures.
1273
01:31:24,210 --> 01:31:25,650
Oh, no, I'm going to try to climb.
1274
01:31:27,650 --> 01:31:32,330
Well, Taylor, I'm glad that you've given
me your support, and I will get in
1275
01:31:32,330 --> 01:31:34,970
touch with your proper organizations,
and hopefully...
1276
01:31:35,680 --> 01:31:37,100
Someone will be knocking on your door
soon.
1277
01:31:37,480 --> 01:31:38,860
They all know where I live.
1278
01:31:39,380 --> 01:31:40,339
Where do you live?
1279
01:31:40,340 --> 01:31:45,560
Well, I don't want to give my address in
the restaurant here because... Why not?
1280
01:31:45,760 --> 01:31:46,860
We're all friends here, Taylor.
1281
01:31:47,080 --> 01:31:48,080
Why not?
1282
01:31:48,160 --> 01:31:49,160
Who said that?
1283
01:31:49,980 --> 01:31:50,980
Who said that?
1284
01:31:51,220 --> 01:31:58,200
Because some of these decorated
natives... Well, I'll give it.
1285
01:31:58,480 --> 01:31:59,480
Sure you'll give it.
1286
01:31:59,800 --> 01:32:02,620
No, I won't because there are people
after me.
1287
01:32:03,800 --> 01:32:04,800
People? Yes.
1288
01:32:06,960 --> 01:32:13,900
The FBI is after me, but I... Well, like
about 15 corner
1289
01:32:13,900 --> 01:32:15,140
boys are after me.
1290
01:32:16,500 --> 01:32:17,500
Corner boys?
1291
01:32:18,760 --> 01:32:22,040
Yeah, guys that get you in a corner and
beat the shit out of you.
1292
01:32:22,460 --> 01:32:23,500
Is that what you're worried about?
1293
01:32:24,700 --> 01:32:25,700
Constantly.
1294
01:32:26,100 --> 01:32:30,900
Constantly. You have to be beaten up
once or twice before you can understand
1295
01:32:30,900 --> 01:32:35,240
what it means to fight this. I've been
in the hospital a couple of times. I've
1296
01:32:35,240 --> 01:32:36,300
been in jail nine times.
1297
01:32:36,940 --> 01:32:37,940
Civil rights activity?
1298
01:32:38,680 --> 01:32:41,440
No, personal rights activity.
1299
01:32:43,720 --> 01:32:47,600
Which I suppose... Who got beaten up?
1300
01:32:48,680 --> 01:32:49,680
Yeah,
1301
01:32:50,540 --> 01:32:53,860
but we shouldn't talk about this. He
started talking about the resistance
1302
01:32:53,860 --> 01:32:55,740
movement. I don't know what they're
talking about.
1303
01:32:56,940 --> 01:32:58,140
That's all there is to it.
1304
01:32:58,820 --> 01:33:00,300
Anyone in the resistance movement?
1305
01:33:02,940 --> 01:33:04,520
What do they do?
1306
01:33:05,700 --> 01:33:06,700
Resist.
1307
01:33:07,050 --> 01:33:08,110
Did you go to Washington?
1308
01:33:08,450 --> 01:33:10,390
Yeah, I just came from there. Did they
put you in jail?
1309
01:33:10,950 --> 01:33:13,230
I didn't go up to the head.
1310
01:33:15,050 --> 01:33:18,370
Well, I was afraid to go because I was
afraid of getting beaten up because no
1311
01:33:18,370 --> 01:33:22,890
matter where I go, I'm always getting
beaten up from the age of seven.
1312
01:33:24,610 --> 01:33:26,630
Men are always trying to beat me up.
1313
01:33:26,950 --> 01:33:29,910
We have to take the pain in order to get
the victory.
1314
01:33:31,010 --> 01:33:32,430
Well, I'd like to give a little.
1315
01:33:34,030 --> 01:33:35,030
Well, never.
1316
01:33:35,690 --> 01:33:36,690
Nothing to give.
1317
01:33:37,930 --> 01:33:40,070
You've got to pick out who you're going
to give to.
1318
01:33:40,290 --> 01:33:43,390
I don't like indiscriminate pain giving.
1319
01:33:43,770 --> 01:33:45,970
Why don't we draw up a list?
1320
01:33:46,730 --> 01:33:50,650
Huh? Why don't we draw up a list of who
should be in the most pain?
1321
01:33:53,170 --> 01:33:54,230
Let's kill Johnson.
1322
01:33:55,170 --> 01:33:56,810
That won't do any good.
1323
01:33:57,750 --> 01:33:58,950
I'd kill Lady Bird.
1324
01:33:59,450 --> 01:34:05,790
See, my button says, where is Lee Harvey
Oswald now that we really need him?
1325
01:34:06,690 --> 01:34:10,770
My button says, where is George Metesky
now that we really need him?
1326
01:34:11,070 --> 01:34:15,750
Oh, but he was the kind I don't like. He
went around putting bombs in seats of
1327
01:34:15,750 --> 01:34:19,030
theaters and things. My button says,
December 4th, the resistance.
1328
01:34:19,350 --> 01:34:22,710
We hope to see you there in front of the
federal building in several cities
1329
01:34:22,710 --> 01:34:24,350
across the United States. Really,
where's the federal?
109341
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