Original subtitles

So I'm parking the car right, and I get a call from my publicist right before I

feel something slam into the back of me. I check my rearview mirror, and there's

a golf cart and some guy.

I'm furious at this point. I'm ready to give some gaffer a piece of my mind. So

I jump out and stomp towards him, and who is it?

Alec Baldwin.

Oh my god. I can't believe that.

Needless to say, he was speechless.

He'd been texting his dog sitter and just hadn't been paying attention.

But he was so sweet and apologetic about the whole thing.

Well, I would have hoped he would have been. He was only working alongside the

lead of the movie for six months.

I'm surprised you didn't bow down and beg for mercy.

Well, he did offer to pay for it and even invited me to dinner as an apology.

Wait. Okay, tell me you took him up on that offer.

I told him that if...

We win. Best pitcher this year?

I'll think about it.

You fuck.

That is such a boss move.

He'll be eating out of the palm of your hand in no time.

No, stop.

He did send flowers the next day, though.

You never told me that.

Oh, honey, it was nothing.

Just a friendly gesture between co -stars.

If you insist.

But? If he wants to take you out.

He has to go through me first.

But really, I cannot believe these stories. They're so crazy.

And I love how you make it sound just as casual as going out to the farmer's

market and seeing a friend there.

I am unbelievably envious.

Same here.

I can't believe that you almost gave up and went back home before you'd signed

with an agency, too. And before you met me.

I cannot believe it. It would have been such a waste.

A waste?

Oh, Jocelyn, no. Not a waste like that.

You know what I mean, okay?

You would have been forced to be normal.

And you said it yourself.

No one from your hometown ever leaves.

They just stay there.

You're right.

You're right. I'd be in the suburbs changing diapers and dragging myself to

kids' soccer matches.

And don't forget weekend trips to Safeco Supermarket and Catfish Roundup.

You're right. You're right.

The consequences of fame.

All the consequences of dating a famous model three blocks from LA's biggest

tabloid.

Now, where were we?

So good to see you. So good to see you.

Let's see you next week.

Drive safely.

Drive. Okay.

Bye. Bye.

Oh.

Someone's feeling playful.

Oh, it's so torturous waiting for them to leave.

I just want you.

Oh. Myself.

You can have me.

come on come on talk to us

Just for the record, I'm glad you decided to stay.

I would have never met such a brilliant, exceptional, beautiful woman.

And I know we've had a small hiccup last year, but... That hiccup,

you mean the affair?

Maybe you know I hate that word.

It just reminds me of all the fighting and crying.

I'm just saying, I think it made us stronger.

And... I just...

I don't know what I'd do without you in my life.

I love you.

I love you too.

I love these.

Gorgeous.

You look so beautiful today

I just love your eyes.

It's perfect, buddy.

I'm

gonna

wash it the entire body.

I have no complaints.

Oh my God.

It's so lucky.

You smell perfect.

Oh, God.

God, he is just so wonderful.

He really

loves me.

um um

Thank you.

You're such a tease, God.

So nice, like, you don't love me. I do, I love you.

You're just too good for it.

You planned this.

I would never.

Then why are you wearing this lingerie?

Why am I wearing it?

I don't know.

um um

Thank you.

Is it mine?

It is all yours.

You promise this time?

I promise.

I want it to be mine.

It completely belongs just to you.

You're gonna tease me right back huh?

Yes I deserve.

You drive me crazy.

I want to feel all of your skin.

Oh my god.

Just feeling your arms on me.

I love

feeling your body

I hate

when we fight

and we'll do a lot more

I just wanna be close to you all the time.

Your hands are magical.

Listen to me.

Everything about you.

Listen to me.

I've got you.

What?

That's not what you would think.

What? Oh, just that you're the sexiest one.

Shut up. That's not true.

You are.

You know that.

Superstar.

You're unreal.

Oh, baby, that's you.

You're so lucky.

I am.

What is this?

What's going on?

Who are you?

I'm the one who's going to give you a choice.

That rarely gets given to anybody.

The choice to start over.

What are you talking about?

Tonight, when Patrick asked you where you thought you'd be if you hadn't taken

this path.

brushed it off.

But you thought about it for a minute.

You think about it often, don't you?

Don't you wonder where you would be now if you had stayed?

None of that matters anymore.

It's in the past.

I can't change any of it.

I am where I am. That's that.

But what if it wasn't?

What if I told you I could take you back?

Give you the power of choice?

Don't you miss your family, Jocelyn?

You haven't spoken to your parents since the day you left.

They're getting so old.

But I could give you that time back.

And I'm still miserable.

Can I come back?

You're looking a gift horse in the mouth.

I am offering you an opportunity that many people would kill for.

Indecisiveness was always one of your worst qualities.

Okay, I'll do it.

I want to go back.

What do I have to do?

Just go to sleep tonight, and when you wake up, you'll start your new life.