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1
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- Kenny?
- Hapnin’ Steve? Window cleaning money.
2
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- You cleanin’ windows now?
- Aye.
3
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- But we stay on the sixth floor.
- Ladders!
4
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Fiver!
5
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Right, there’s £2.50. Come back for George’s later.
6
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Hello...
7
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Paul [O/S]: Steve, where are ye? Its twenty past ten!
8
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You’re on a nine - five today. You’re supposed to be training me anawl!
9
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- Who’s this?
- It’s Paul! C’mon man, I’ve been pretending to dial customers for an hour now.
10
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- Who?
- It's Paul.
11
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Emm...
12
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Paul... from work!...‘CALL-PAUL’!
13
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Hiya.
14
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Aw ‘Call-Paul’! How ye doi...
15
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SHITE!
16
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Ughhh...
17
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Whit ye daein'!?
18
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- I'm late for work!
- Shite!
19
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Awk where are they!?
20
00:02:03,160 --> 00:02:06,400
Whit are ye looking for? Eh?
21
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,640
- Paracetemol.
- Fridge.
22
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- Whit they daein' in there?
- Well they work better when they’re cold!
23
00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:20,560
- Do they?
- Aye, I think they dae. Gie's two eh? I’m dying here.
24
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Gie’s a beer oot anaw eh?
25
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:34,480
Jesus, George! Where are yer clothes!? Ye could hang curtains aff that thing!
26
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- Ooft, apologies.
- Jesus!
27
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Right, here.
28
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- I’m dyin’ man.
- I cannae believe I slept in!
29
00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:51,600
- Don't worry mate!
- How?
30
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See ye later.
31
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Instrumental
32
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- Never. Drinking. Again.
- Agreed. Was definitely the Grouse.
33
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- And the Jaeger.
- And the Sambuca.
34
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And they chocolate liqueurs.
35
00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:42,880
Jigsaw anyone?
36
00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:45,520
- What a night.
- I wonder how the boys are feeling.
37
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If they feel half as bad as I do, I feel sorry for them.
38
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Well I think that’s a given. The only thing they weren’t having last night was my critique of the decor.
39
00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:58,199
I quite liked it. Steve bringing the guitar out for ‘Shangalang’ was a bit much though.
40
00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:01,679
And when George started wrestling Gordon the landlord, that was a bit weird.
41
00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:05,160
- Especially when they de-robed...
- Yeah. Got weird.
42
00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:08,880
Anyway, what do you say we cure these hangovers Glasgow style?
43
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:13,240
- With more drink?
- No! With an informative walk around the city.
44
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- Informative?
- He means long.
45
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And Berry, that’s not a Glasgow thing. No one here does that, it’s just you.
46
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Not yet. Care to join?
47
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No way.
48
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Well, I’ll come along. Can’t make me feel any worse.
49
00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:28,560
Don’t be so sure.
50
00:04:44,120 --> 00:04:46,999
Did ye no’ hear yer phone? Simon’s been calling ye all morning!
51
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Number one rule Paul, never answer yer phone when it’s the work calling. Even when ye miss the call.
52
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Awk, besides, it’s the first time I’ve been late... this week.
53
00:04:56,920 --> 00:04:59,200
What does he expect, I rushed straight here 'n everything!
54
00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:02,280
Hmm... aye.
55
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:07,040
- So, what happened wi’ your rent last night?
- Aw, George won a bet and paid it.
56
00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:11,480
Aw right. That was convenient. A tad unbelievable even.
57
00:05:13,040 --> 00:05:15,240
- It happens.
- Right.
58
00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:18,400
So, you met your new neighbours then, eh?
59
00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:21,160
How do you know that?
60
00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:25,040
Awk, it was all over Facebook. And you were going on about one of them in particular.
61
00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:30,280
- Was I?
- Awk aye. Was nothing bad or that though Steve, y’know. It was sweet.
62
00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:33,200
- What was sweet?
- Yer status.
63
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:36,520
- What status!?
- Yer Facebook status!
64
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Simon[O/S]: Steve, you're already an hour late, son.
65
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Aw, traffic was murder Simon.
66
00:05:43,880 --> 00:05:45,080
Simon[O/S]: Phone!
67
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:47,920
What does that status say!?
68
00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:51,359
‘I love Lucky’...
Who’s ‘Lucky’?
69
00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:55,599
Aw, is that you back already Steve? Here, who’s Lu...
70
00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:59,039
Sapphire! It’s yerself! How ye daein'?
71
00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:01,079
Alright George! How’s your soul?
72
00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:05,239
Ehh, good. Well, still suffering...
73
00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:07,919
...where’s my trousers...
How are you?
74
00:06:07,920 --> 00:06:10,360
Great now that I’ve had a few of these!
75
00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:14,880
Oh, drinking the next day!? That’s alky patter that!
76
00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:19,919
- Where’s Steve?
- Work. He must be dying.
77
00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:23,280
- Gotta pay the rent eh?
- Aye, ye could say that.
78
00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:26,519
Here, d’you know anyone called Lucky by the way?
79
00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:29,600
- Lucky?
- Aye, look at Steve’s Facebook.
80
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‘I love Lucky’. Lucky?
81
00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:38,040
Hmm, dunno. Lucy?
82
00:06:38,200 --> 00:06:41,119
Lucy? Who Lucy – Lucy!?
83
00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,800
Maybe! Did he mention anything about her last night?
84
00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:45,680
I cannae mind...
85
00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:54,920
She’s the one George! I know! See, when ye know, ye know. I know.
86
00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:57,920
Aw I cannae mind, c'mon!...
87
00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:04,120
Me 'n her, right. We’re gonnae go on holiday. Santa Ponsa.
88
00:07:04,960 --> 00:07:08,400
Go in to that Timpsons the morra 'n book it 'n that.
89
00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:11,359
C’mon George, think!...
90
00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:16,479
I. Love. Lucy.
I Love Lucy!
91
00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:19,199
Aw wait! I remember, he said...
92
00:07:19,200 --> 00:07:23,600
I could’ve mate. I could’ve represented.
93
00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:31,000
Olympic gold, nae bother. ’lympic gold.
94
00:07:32,640 --> 00:07:36,159
Pfft. ‘lympics! He cannae even swim.
95
00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:37,999
- Anything?
- Naa, nothing.
96
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,839
Aw well.
97
00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:41,680
Is that ‘Strike it Lucky’?
98
00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:45,240
Oh aye. I love chilling wi' a wee bitta Barrymore.
99
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What am I gonnae do Paul!? I cannae have her seeing that status, I've just met her!
100
00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:51,719
Calm doon Steve, it’s only a daft status.
101
00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,919
- Aw God, I cannae believe I’ve done this again!
- Again? What, have you done this before!?
102
00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:59,719
Aye I’ve done it before! Aw why do I do these things, why!? What are we gonnae dae Paul!?
103
00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,279
- We?
- We!
104
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:04,560
- Emm... Phone George?
- Simon took my phone!
105
00:08:15,240 --> 00:08:18,159
Top, top! Ah, he’s went for the bottom!
106
00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:21,000
Aw, well in!
107
00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:27,079
- Hello?
- George, it’s me.
108
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:28,959
- Who?
- Me, Steve.
109
00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:31,160
- What’s the code word?
- Whit?
110
00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:34,199
- Whit’s the code word?
- The code word!? Jesus, George I’m in work.
111
00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:36,520
- I need to know it’s you.
- Well who else is it gonnae be?
112
00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:41,160
- Code word!
- Why would we even need a code word? Who's gonnae go to the trouble of phoning you, pretending to be me eh!?
113
00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:44,719
- Well I don’t know.
- Get a lot of calls do ye George? Busy day for ye George!?
114
00:08:44,720 --> 00:08:45,839
I’m gonnae need to hang up.
115
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GOOCH!
116
00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:49,880
Steve! I thought it was you. How ye daein'?
117
00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:53,400
- Have you seen my Facebook status?
- Aye, whit aboot it?
118
00:08:53,560 --> 00:08:59,039
- Whit aboot it? I’ve gone and done it again haven’t I!?
- Awk calm doon, it’s fine! Even Sapphire says it’s fine.
119
00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:01,519
- Sapphire!?
- Aye, she’s here as well.
120
00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:04,840
- Hi Steve!
- She says hi.
- Hi Sapphire.
121
00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:09,480
- That you calmed doon now?
- Look, I need ye to log in to my Facebook and delete that status.
122
00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:11,560
Aye nae bother.
123
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:16,240
- Whit’s yer password?
- The code word.
124
00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:18,479
- The code word?
- Aye.
125
00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:20,600
- Whit code word?
- Our code word.
126
00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:22,719
- Eh?
- Gooch.
127
00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:24,759
You’re breaking up Steve, say it again.
128
00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:26,039
Gooch.
129
00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:27,880
- Whit!?
- Gooch!
130
00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:30,120
Right, right.
131
00:09:32,600 --> 00:09:36,960
- Says you’re wrong, wrong password Steve.
- Emm, try a capital ‘g’.
132
00:09:39,760 --> 00:09:44,320
- Naa, still nothing. Is one of the O’s a zero maybe?
- Try it 'n see.
133
00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:51,480
- Naa, it’s no’ that either.
- Shite! Right, wait. Just wait. Let me think.
134
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- Aw SHITE!
- Whit is it!?!
135
00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:05,280
- I tried three O’s ‘n it says you’re locked oot noo.
- Gooch1! It was Gooch1!
136
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:08,280
Right that’s it. I’m comin’ up the road.
137
00:10:09,640 --> 00:10:10,759
Put a holiday through for me Simon!
138
00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:12,640
Simon[O/S]: - You've no holidays left!
- Cheers Si!
139
00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:16,079
Right, you’re comin’ anawl Paul... ‘Anawl-Paul’!
140
00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:19,239
- Another wee rhyme eh!
- That’s the nature of the beast Paul. I’m a poet and I just don’t hide it.
141
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,600
- I don’t think that’s the saying Steve.
- ’Mon!
142
00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:27,640
Instrumental
143
00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:32,400
- I thought we were going for a walk?
- Angular.
144
00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:36,560
- What?
- Steve’s face. It’s rather, angular.
145
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:40,120
- Oh, right.
- Like an unsolved Rubik’s Cube.
146
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:43,320
- Yeah I guess.
- Do you plan on solving that particular puzzle?
147
00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:44,759
Where’s this coming from?
148
00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:49,560
I’ve always been one for vibes Lucy, you know that. And there was a certain amount of ‘pick up’ between you two last night.
149
00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:54,800
Well, you know me, Berry. I’ve never been particularly good at puzzles.
150
00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:56,040
Ah, touché.
151
00:10:56,920 --> 00:11:00,840
- Is this due soon?
- Well, you never can be too sure when one will... come along.
152
00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:05,239
- Yeah, they’re always letting you down eh?
- Only when you’re relying on a timetable.
153
00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,120
Well how else are you meant to know when to get on?
154
00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:10,680
There’s always one on its way, you just have to make sure you get on the right one.
155
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:15,599
You don’t want to end up on the wrong one, where there’s no way home and the only bus in circulation
156
00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:18,119
is the one you just got off and it leaves you stranded there...
157
00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:23,119
- I get the subtext Berry.
- Well, perfect timing. Because here’s the bus.
158
00:11:23,120 --> 00:11:26,120
- Really?
- But is it the right one?
159
00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:31,279
I’ve done it again! I’ve done it again!
160
00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:32,799
What’s the big deal Steve?
161
00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:36,600
Big deal!? Big deal!? I’ll tell ye the big deal Sapphire!
162
00:11:37,120 --> 00:11:41,839
She’ll be doon there right now, laughing at that status. Laughing at it! Laughing at me!
163
00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:45,039
I’ll become an object of ridicule.
No one’s laughing at him are they!?
164
00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:48,520
Naw, they're laughing at me. Laughing at me! Laughing!
165
00:11:49,560 --> 00:11:52,800
- Armadillo.
- Because of the shape?
166
00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:53,720
Mmm.
167
00:11:54,960 --> 00:11:57,279
- Who’s laughing at ye?
- The group chat!
168
00:11:57,280 --> 00:12:01,160
Y'see, she’ll have taken a screenshot of that status and sent it to the group chat,
169
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:05,839
and everyone in that group chat will have two blue ticks next to their name.
170
00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:09,519
Tick, tick. Blue! Because they’ve all seen it.
171
00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:13,599
They’ve seen it and they’re laughing. A group, chatting and laughing.
172
00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:16,200
Chatting and laughing at screenshots! Aw God!
173
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:23,600
Calm down Steve. I’ve seen this sorta thing happen before.
Last week in class, I spot a phone left on the desk next to me.
174
00:12:24,080 --> 00:12:28,960
Mobile phone. Astronaut grey.
And all sorts of possibilities are racing through my mind;
175
00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:32,480
Selfies, fraping, music magpie!
176
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:35,600
- Whit did ye dae?
- Nothing! Touch ID.
177
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:40,280
But that’s no’ the point Steve. The point is what happens next.
178
00:12:40,680 --> 00:12:48,759
Vv-Vv text. Vv-vv Facebook notification.
Vv-Vv Snapchat. Vvvvvvvvvvvv, phone call!
179
00:12:48,760 --> 00:12:53,519
Unanswered. Unnoticed. Insignificant, Steve!
180
00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:58,880
The guy whose phone it was, was up the other end of the room, having a laugh wi’ his mates.
181
00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:02,279
- Ye get what I’m saying!?
- Naw.
182
00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:09,400
The phone! It didnae matter. People, connecting, face tae face, that’s what matters.
183
00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:13,760
I mean, this thing hasn’t stopped buzzing all week!
184
00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:16,760
Aw God!
185
00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:22,320
- D’you think you can hire boats?
- I would imagine so.
186
00:13:24,920 --> 00:13:28,240
Don’t touch me! Don’t touch me!
187
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:33,519
- Wonder how they got the cone up there?
- Hmm.
188
00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:37,920
Aw it’s a mess, a mess! And y’know what the problem is?
189
00:13:38,960 --> 00:13:43,400
I like her. I dae. I like her!
190
00:13:45,120 --> 00:13:48,120
- Ahh!
- Yes!
- I knew it!
191
00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:50,080
Aw, wanker!
192
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:54,840
- Who are you again?
- Paul.
193
00:13:57,280 --> 00:14:01,280
- Who?
- I’ve been here the full time.
194
00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:03,520
Whit’s the codeword?
195
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:07,239
Well that was enjoyable, even if I do say so myself.
196
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:11,719
- Enjoyable? We’ve been round half of bloody Glasgow!
- Nothing wrong with exploration my dear.
197
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:13,919
Anyway, cuppa?
198
00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:17,199
Emm, I was gonna go up 'n see what Steve and George are up to.
199
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:21,039
- Well give Steve my love as well as yours.
- I’m only going to go and see how they’re doing.
200
00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:24,280
My love is like a red, red rose...
201
00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:38,960
That’ll be her the noo.
202
00:14:39,160 --> 00:14:41,639
That, that could be her. Paul, answer the door!
203
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:44,080
- Whit!? How can he no’ get it!?
- I’m naked!
204
00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:48,320
- Well, whit about you? Why can you no’ get it!?
- I’m naked too, emotionally!
205
00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:50,159
- I don’t even live in here!
- Paul!
206
00:14:50,160 --> 00:14:51,360
Paul[O/S]: - Whit!?
George[O/S] - Be a mate!
207
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,920
- Hi Lucy!
- Oh, hi Sapphire.
208
00:14:54,600 --> 00:14:56,119
Lucy[O/S] - How long have you been here?
209
00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:57,440
All day. Come in!
210
00:14:57,720 --> 00:14:58,680
Sapphire[O/S]: Take your jacket off!
211
00:14:58,880 --> 00:15:00,959
Steve’s freaking out because he wrote a status about you.
212
00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:03,039
Lucy[O/S]: Aw, so I’m ‘Lucky’?
213
00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:06,519
I dunno about that, he could’ve at least spelled your name right. Actors for you.
214
00:15:06,520 --> 00:15:08,600
I like actors.
215
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:17,480
Well, I think I’m gonnae go for a shower.
216
00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:20,760
Actually, I’ll just sit here the now.
217
00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:27,079
I’m Paul, by the way.
218
00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,439
- Aw nice to meet ye, I’m Lucy.
- Aw right, nice meet!...
219
00:15:29,440 --> 00:15:31,560
Nice to meet ye, Lucy.
220
00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:37,319
Emm, I work with Steve, at the call centre.
221
00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:40,960
- Aw cool.
- Aye! Well...
222
00:15:44,280 --> 00:15:46,240
Any chance of a beer Steve?
223
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:51,040
A beer? Aye! Anybody else wantin’ one? Eh, Lucy? You, wanting one?
224
00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:55,799
I’ve got wine or, or Tia Maria. Or, a Drambuie?
225
00:15:55,800 --> 00:16:01,960
Steve[O/S]: Or a Pernod! D’you like Pernod? A white zinfandel?...in fact...
226
00:16:05,200 --> 00:16:08,320
Actually, all we have is beer.
227
00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:11,800
And bleach.
228
00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:14,759
No, I’m okay thanks. Had enough last night.
229
00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:18,159
Aw same, same! I had too much.
230
00:16:18,160 --> 00:16:20,800
- Have you got any Vimto?
- Vimto?
231
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:25,760
Eh, aye, I got some this morning actually. I’ll go 'n get it.
232
00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:27,720
Ooft, that was lucky!
233
00:16:28,360 --> 00:16:30,600
Lucky!
234
00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:34,280
I should be so lucky in love!
235
00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:37,999
Dinnae worry Steve, I’ve explained everything.
236
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:41,920
Yeah Steve don’t worry about it, was just a daft drunk status. We’ve all done it.
237
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:43,399
Awk God, aye.
238
00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:46,840
Well, actually, to be fair, I haven’t.
239
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:51,879
Naa, it’s usually texts with me, or phone calls sometimes, letters even.
240
00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:57,960
In fact, d’you know one time right, I turned up at this lassie’s door in the middle of the night! She wouldn’t let me in though.
241
00:16:59,160 --> 00:17:02,400
Naa she wouldn’t. She wouldn’t let me in.
242
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:06,760
Had to spend the rest of the night in the back garden.
243
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:09,440
And it was freezing.
244
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:15,720
It’s alright Paul.
245
00:17:16,360 --> 00:17:19,320
Steve, get the beers.
246
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:22,560
Hide the bleach.
247
00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:31,160
Didn’t know you smoked.
248
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:36,240
Aw naw, I don’t. I don’t. I mean I do, but only when I’m drinking.
249
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,320
Which seems to be all the time since I moved in with George.
250
00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:43,320
- D’you want one?
- No thanks. I just came out for some fresh air.
251
00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:45,720
Same, same.
252
00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:53,120
You’re lucky y’know. Real best friends are hard to come by.
It’s pretty obvious with you two.
253
00:17:53,560 --> 00:17:55,400
How long have you been friends?
254
00:17:56,760 --> 00:18:00,240
Known each other since primary school. D’you want to know how we met?
255
00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:04,479
It was in the playground. I was sitting there by myself, eating my pieces,
256
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:07,799
watching all the other boys 'n girls in my class just running around, playing a game.
257
00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:15,920
- Aw, they were leaving ye out?
- Awk naw, it was nothing like that. I was just... observing.
258
00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:23,240
Anyway I’m watching them and there’s just this one boy who just cannot grasp the rules of the game they're playing.
259
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:24,159
What were they playing?
260
00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:24,960
Tig.
261
00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:32,320
But this boy, he’s just walking about trying to talk to people. Of course everybody’s running away from him because he’s ‘het’.
262
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:43,200
Eventually he spots me. He looks right at me and then starts to walk right towards me. But then he stops, looks up...
263
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:47,240
...and a bird shites in his eye!
George.
264
00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:51,399
Looked exactly the same way he does now, minus the fags 'n the whisky of course.
265
00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:56,920
- Why did he look up?
- No idea. And all these years later I’m still not surprised he did.
266
00:18:57,360 --> 00:19:02,480
It’s almost like he’s got a sixth sense... for shite.
267
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:08,079
- So, how you settling in then?
- So far so good.
268
00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:11,359
It’s like moving to a different planet, so much going on.
269
00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:12,639
Really? Where are ye from?
270
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:13,880
East Kilbride.
271
00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:19,400
- Good, aye, good...
- So, how long have you lived here?
272
00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:25,199
About a year. And in all that time I reckon we’ve paid about four months’ rent.
273
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:30,080
- Wow, impressive! You’ll need to teach me your technique.
- Aw, definitely.
274
00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:34,280
- Couple of born and bred Weegies then?
- Aye, I guess so.
275
00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:37,840
We did almost move to London once, we were on the train and everything.
276
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,799
What changed your mind?
277
00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:42,040
- Gonorrhoea.
- Excuse me?
278
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:44,999
While we were on the train, George got a phone call.
279
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:50,559
Turned out he’d landed a part in an advert he’d auditioned for the month before. Gonorrhoea awareness.
280
00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:54,680
- That was lucky!
- Too right it was lucky, stupid bastard forgot the train tickets.
281
00:19:56,360 --> 00:20:01,560
The advert money was too good to turn down though, so we got off at the next stop and begged my maw to come pick us up.
282
00:20:01,920 --> 00:20:08,880
It’s a funny feeling but, seeing your whole life going in a brand new direction, heading off towards a new city.
283
00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:14,840
Literally seeing everything change with every passing mile of the train journey.
284
00:20:15,360 --> 00:20:16,239
How far did you get?
285
00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:17,120
Motherwell.
286
00:20:18,040 --> 00:20:21,240
I do sometimes wonder what it would’ve been like if we moved down there though.
287
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:24,640
Well, I’m glad you didn’t.
288
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:32,720
Naa, I could never go without him. We’ve been through thick and thin together.
289
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:36,519
Best pals. We love each other.
290
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:41,080
- Steve! Gimme back my fags ya wanker!
- Shut up ya dick!
291
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:45,519
So what happened to his advert then? Was it on the tv?
292
00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:49,639
- Oh aye, aye. Lasted about a week until it was banned.
- Banned!?
293
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:50,599
Banned.
294
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:52,520
Let’s just say it wasn’t in the best taste.
295
00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:55,480
So what about you then? Have you been in anything?
296
00:20:56,000 --> 00:21:02,560
Naa, naa... Oh, well unless you’re a fan of zero budget, student films that never ever make it on to the screen?
297
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:04,280
Depends who’s in it.
298
00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:10,640
The truth is, I’ve kinda, taken a break from it, y’know? Focus on my work.
299
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:14,439
- The call centre?
- Aye! Aye, I’m trying to get top salesperson.
300
00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:15,520
What is it you sell?
301
00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:17,880
Cremations.
302
00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:19,800
Right.
303
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:24,240
Well, make sure you go back to it.
304
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:28,760
I love actors. They see the world in such a unique way.
305
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:32,720
George was telling me he’s writing his own film. I really admire that.
306
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:37,880
- You do?
- Oh yeah, people expressing themselves creatively!
307
00:21:38,520 --> 00:21:39,919
He’s just ripping off Sci-Fi films.
308
00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:46,240
There’s just such a wonderful energy around people who want to share their passions and talents with the rest of the world.
309
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:51,240
Something really, attractive about it...
310
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,519
It's about time we stopped,
311
00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:59,879
before the blackout...
312
00:21:59,880 --> 00:22:02,320
Guess the fresh air’s going to my head.
313
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:06,080
I should call it a night then...
314
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:12,320
Aye. Aye, same. Same.
315
00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:13,880
Night, then.
316
00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:16,560
Night.
317
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:21,840
...or the ones you might regret.
318
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,079
And baby, if there's one thing that's true,
319
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:25,799
And baby, if there's one thing that's true,
320
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,079
I don't know the first thing about you.
321
00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:31,879
Doesn't mean that I didn't love you...
322
00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:34,319
Fire Brigade please!
323
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:36,279
Ehh, Steve.
324
00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:38,280
Aye it's the bin again...
325
00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:41,440
Gonnae hurry!
326
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:47,519
...and I never seen it before,
327
00:22:47,520 --> 00:22:50,759
and I can't get past it now,
328
00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:54,119
but even if I could somehow
329
00:22:54,120 --> 00:22:57,799
it wouldn't be the same.
330
00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:00,919
There's nothing left to say,
331
00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:04,359
Your lips are moving and not quietly,
332
00:23:04,360 --> 00:23:06,080
same pish you told me yesterday...
29132
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