All language subtitles for UnREAL.2015.-.S04E02.-.Double.Down.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.x265.Celdra_track3_[eng]

♪♪

You brought back August?

It's called
"Everlasting All-Stars."

Like it or not,
you boned an All-Star.

Welcome to the wild, wild west
version of "Everlasting."

Hump or Dump.

[ Men cheering ]

We are taking your show
to the next level.

Tommy Castelli.

Tommy's the new producer
and game designer

I emailed you about.

[ Inhales sharply ]Alexi and Candi
are joining the show.

We're gonna have to
hide the ball

on the whole stripper thing.

Candi Coco is a superfan.

I choose Rodrigo.

How dare you?! You know he's
the only reason I'm even here!

-Welcome back, Roger.
-He full-on

frat-boy-date-raped her.

You brought Maya back.

Not even a trace
of feminist guilt?

I'm all in, Quinn.

You spend all your time
pushing

these shiny bimbos over
the finish line, but you?

You can't quite get there
yourself.

I can get there.

I'm gonna get a ring on it

by the end of this season.

You're back with Chet.

[ Laughs ]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[ Door closes ]

♪♪

Hey.

Hey.

Hey.

Last night was...

Mm-hmm, me, too.

♪♪

[ Both groan ]

Uhh...

Oh, sh-- Damn it!
Oh! Shh!

[ Hushed voice ]
Shh. Please be quiet.

People are trying to
sleep around here.

Shh.

[ Door creaks closed ]

Look at you, Goldberg.

A little early-morning
hammock shopping?

August and I have had a very
deep connection since day one.

-Come on.
-You know,

we were actually awake all
night, talking about Africa.

Wait, and you didn't
sleep with him?

You aretrying to close.

Oh my God, this is not
a game, dude. This is real.

Hey, that's beautiful.

Why do you even care?

I don't. As long as your game
doesn't get in the way of ours.

I can multitask.

All right, then
let's make this interesting.

For me, I mean.

-Hmm?
-Let's put some money on it.

You lock down one of
these All-Stars, I'll
give you my producer bonus.

That's really funny, but I'm
not looking for your money.

Psht. Don't worry,
you're not gonna get it.

It'll be fun.
I enjoy a good train wreck.

Well, the train's
not crashing,

so watch out...

you might get run over.

♪♪

♪♪

Ow.

You okay?

Uh...yeah.

♪♪

I should've never
listened to you.

After my little outburst
last night,

America hates me, right?

Are you kidding? You showed
a whole new side of yourself --

strong, independent.

I'm American's sweetheart.

I don't mud-sling anyone.

Come on, Candi Coco?

Not exactly competition
for Noelle.

[ Laughter ]

[ Indistinct chatter ]

-Okay. Thanks, mate.
-Mm!

Oh God, I have to fix this.

[ Chuckling ]

Camera on Noelle. Now.

-Copy.
-Hey.

-Hi. Oh, hi.
-Hi.

Um, I --
I just wanted to say...

I'm really sorry
about last night.

I totally overreacted.

Oh, that's okay. I have
always been a big Nicole fan.

It's Noelle.

Oh yeah, right. Sorry.

Rachel! Where is Rachel?
Anyone?

Hey. I saw the numbers.
Congrats.

You know what?
Um, I need Rachel.

I need to talk to her
right now.

I haven't seen her yet
this morning.

Then do us both a favor --
wipe off that suck-up smile

and find her.

[ Sighs ] Excuse me.
Quinn!

-[ Sighs ]
-Hi.

-[ Clears throat ]
-I don't know what

she told you
to get on this show,

but Candi Coco
is no superfan.

She called me Nicole.
[ Scoffs ]

And as I'm sure you know,

I'm the number-four all-time fan
favorite on "Everlasting."

Ooh, yes, one of the greatest
cruelties in life, Noelle,

is that there is no prize
for fourth place.

Well, I'm Noelle.
And I'm sure as hell

not gonna let some fake superfan
steal my guy.

Candi's a liar,
and I'm gonna prove it.

-Good luck with that.
-Uh--

Jay! Oh my God, last night
with Sofia, it was amazing.

Once she got past that I'm an
international ballet superstar,

she really saw who I am.

I mean, for real,
you know -- inside.

Yeah, a lot of people have seen
the inside of you, Alexi.

[ Chuckles ]
Hey, Jay.

-Hey.
-What?

Hey, look, um, I'm going
to an N.A. meeting tonight.

I think maybe
you should come. Hm?

Why would I want to go
and listen to a bunch

of self-centered whiners

complain about their lives,
Alexi?

It's what I do at work
every day.

♪♪

Rachel. Here.

You got me a coffee?

What,
are we besties again?

I have to talk to you
after the meeting.

Okay, great show last night,
everyone!

But now I want
tits out farther,

dicks harder,
and tantrums tearier!

Candi is popping big,

but Noelle
wants to take her down,

so we have to protect
our little stripper.

I am so sorry,
but this entire season

cannot be your own
personal Candyland.

That's true. We've got
sick twists planned and --

If Candi pops big
on "Everlasting,"

then we can use her to
sell "Stripper Queen"

straight to series.

So she cannot get cut.

[ Scoffs ] Well,
hey, you're in luck,

'cause the men are choosing
at the Elimination Ceremony

tonight and Rodrigo

is actually into Candi,
so he'll be safe.

Hey, you know what,
I stopped listening
halfway through that.

As long as Candi
is safe, we're good.

Candi is not the problem --
Alexi's the one

we have got to get him out of
here before he crashes and OD's.

He showed me his
Twelve Step wallet card.

He's fine.

He is not fine!

He is fresh out of rehab
and on two shows now.

Aw. Meow.

-[ Sighs ]
-Look at you little pussies.

If we followed all the rules,
we wouldn't have a show.

Did it just get
handsomer in here?

Blue Jay? Jay Dynamite?

-Bobby?
-It's Tommy.

What are you wearing?

This is called a suit, blondie.

Going for visitation rights
with my son, in court.

And I am going to win,

and I am going to spend
the day with my son.

And I'm gonna take him
to the Golden State game.

He's a year and a half.

We're gonna leave
after half time.

Maybe stay for the show.

I want him to see
the Warrior Dancers.

[ Laughs ] Okay.
Do you even have a car seat?

I'll get one.

Walter, uh, in props!

All right, let's do this!

Go out and get me
some good TV!

And you, in my office.
Now.

Oh, I'm sorry, but unless
you've got another stripper

or recovering coke addict
you'd like to force on me,

I have a show to produce.

Hey, come on.
You have five minutes.

No. I don't.

-Hey, Rachel.
-Hey.

Thank you so much
for last night.

But do you think August
is gonna think I'm a weirdo

for having
bailed out on him?

No, trust me.
August is fine.

Hi, Maya.
I got to steal her. Sorry.

Yeah.
You look great by the way.

-Thank you. Hey?
-Hi. I just need to get you...

Hey.

Hey. So, are you

as tired
as I am right now?

You look very rested
and refreshed.

[ Laughs ]
Thank you.

-Guess I'm gonna --
-[ Clears throat ]

I'm gonna catch you
later, okay?

Of course,
he's your target.

August and I actually
had something real

until you sexually assaulted him
last season.

Okay, seriously?
Come here.

Look, you may think that
he's all crunchy and spiritual,

but he tried to expose me.

He threatened
to sue the show, remember?

Well, he's not gonna
do that with me.

Ah, of course not.

Just because you haven't
seen that side of him

doesn't mean you won't.

Hey. Rachel.

Hm?
Wake up.

People are here
for a million dollars.

That is a rougher game,
and your boyfriend's playing it.

So look out.

Oh, is this you trying
to help me again?

Wha-- Why is that
so hard to believe?

[ Indistinct chatter ]

Because that's not
what you do.

♪♪

♪♪

You know, as baseball great
Yogi Berra once said,

"When you come to a fork
in the road, take it."

Welcome to today's challenge

of "Hell or Spell."

Now, when
this starter pistol sounds,

each one of you is gonna
run down the field,

shinny up your pole.

When you get to the top
of the pole,

you will hit that orange button.

You will receive a token.

You will take your token,

you will race
right back down the field

to your puzzle screens.

You will then insert the token,

and each one of you
will receive a letter.

The objective is to guess
the five-letter word

that describes
this afternoon's date.

A spelling bee?
That absolutely S-U-C-K-S.

[ Laughs ]

Now, the last contestant left
on the field will unfortunately

be sent home alone

While his teammates get to party

for another day in paradise.

Our All-Star ladies will be here
along the sidelines,

locked and loaded.

Bang, bang, bang!

Okay, let's cut and reset,
please.

-Okay, reset, guys.
-Paintball? Seriously?

You yanks do love
your guns, don't you?

You want to win
a million dollars or what?

Okay.

Trouble down under?

Ah. No. Not at all.

You know, but it's not
just about August.

There's lots of guys
out here.

-Hola, bonita!
-Hola, señor!

Oh. Yeah,
I could totally see that.

-All-Star studs, are you ready?
-Yeah!

Excellent! Good answer!
Now...

-Hey. Uh, listen, Ra--
-Okay, here we go.

Here we go.

You know what? Listen,

I do want to talk
to you later, okay?

Man up, gentlemen!
Let the games...begin!

[ Starter pistol fires ]

[ Laughing ]

[ Paintballs firing ]

[ Beep, whoosh ]

[ Women laughing ]

[ Indistinct chatter ]

Ye...yo la...yo la tengo?
Uh...

[ Monitor dings ]

[ Buzzer ]

Okay, does he not know that
we shoot this show in English?!

He'll be fine.
He'll get it.

♪♪

[ Monitor dings ]

[ Monitor dinging ]

[ Whoosh, ding ]

Oh my God -- Jack won!
With just one letter.

He is good.

Woman: Go, Rodrigo!

[ Paintballs firing ]

Unh?
You like that, Roger?

Agh! Ohh!

You just hit Roger
in the nuts!

Damn right I did!

[ Monitor dings ]

"Y," "C"...

[ Monitor buzzes ]

Whoa!
Go back again.

Seriously, Rachel, are we
gonna lose a bangable wifey

just because he never got
Hooked on Phonics?

[ Chuckles ]

[ Monitor beeps ]Yep. Got it!

Yep. Got it!

[ Monitor dings ]

-Yes!
-Hey, look.

Alexi just got it,
and he can't even talk.

Roger, August, Alexi,
and Jack are all safe!

Did you not realize
that Rodrigo's English sucks?

Rodrigo owns a stupid yacht.
He should know how to spell it.

Look, Candi can't lose,

so Rodrigo
can't lose this challenge.

So call a time out, or make
somebody have a heart attack,

I don't care,
just stop the game.

I can't do that.

Oh. Well, I can.

No. Quinn, come on. It's
a huge compliance violation.

This isn't our regular
mind-game shit.

Once there's money on the line,
it's a whole different level.

You mess with these challenges,
you got the FCC up your ass.

Things get ugly real quick.

[ Laughs ] This show
is all about ugly.

We're talking
federal laws here.

So break them.

Sorry. I'm not going
to jail for you.

Aw. Looks like you
hired yourself a Boy Scout.

Let me talk to him.
I want Rodrigo here

even more than you,
trust me.

Hey. Hey.
Listen to me.

You have to work
with me on this.

Just cut the crap
and save Rodrigo.

I'm not risking my career --
or worse --

just 'cause you got
a hard-on for the guy.

No, he was our final four.
We had it all mapped out.

Yeah, when we thought
he could speak English.

He's stinking it up,
and we got to adjust.

Rodrigo is
the hottest guy here.

The show can't afford
to lose him.

Yeah, [scoffs] right...
the show.

[ Electricity crackles ]

Hey!

[ Electricity crackling ]

Hey, something's wrong!

This thing's broken!

Cameras down! Stop the game!
Damn it!

Well, you know, just go in there
and do your best to fix it.

Hey, Tommy.
What the hell happened?

I tested this game
20 times, easy --

there was never a problem.

My games do not screw up.

Hm. Yeah.
Well, this one did.

♪♪

[ Monitor dings ]

All right!
Okay, people!

Graham: Luke and Rodrigo,
when this starter pistol sounds,

each one of you will
shinny up your pole.

And action!

[ Starter pistol fires ]

[ Women cheering ]

[ Beep ]

[ Cheering continues ]

Agh! Wait! Agh!

[ Bone cracks ]

[ People gasping ]

[ Groaning ]

-Yacht! Yacht!
-Everyone stop!

You all right?
Just don't move, okay?

[ Groaning ]

[ Gasping ]

Yacht! Yacht!
I got the yacht!

I got one!
And I do speak English!

-You all right? You all right?
-I won!

Damn it.

Dan, is he okay?

Yeah, I heard a pop.

Well, that's never good.

So Rodrigo wins.

I think we all do.

♪♪

[ Laughs ]

[ Siren chirps ]Hey. Hey, buddy.

Hey, rough news on the,
uh, pelvis, huh?

Hey, listen, I think
you're gonna love

this "Everlasting"
Step Counter.

You know, eventually.

[ Moans, sighs ]

Hey. So, how'd you
make that happen?

I mean, you know, I might've
thrown a circuit breaker

maybe and slipped
the best boy some lube

that I stole from
Skye's dressing room.

Oh, really?

Yeah, I did get a light whiff
of cherry cheesecake.

You're welcome. Okay, but now
I actually need your help.

Candi is a loose cannon,

so we need to get her
to learn her script -- fast.

I'll see what I can do.

Okay.

Hey. Hey. Uh, listen...

-Hm?
-...Rachel...

Look, I know you got upset
that I left,

but I always thought
you were leaving, too.

I mean, I had no idea.

Well, I mean, I called you,
and you never called me back.

I know. I...
[ Laughs ]

I just got all...caught up.

In Chet. [ Laughs ]

I just wanted to unplug,

get down to, like,
less than five drinks a day.

I was always coming back.

Yeah.

Look, things are

really crazy right now.

I actually need you to help me
figure out what I'm gonna --

Dan: Rachel, we only have
the yacht till 5:00.

I need everyone in the van, ad
Skye's still waxing herself.

Okay. Dan, yes.
I will be there in one second.

Copy.

What, like --
What were we talking about?

You know what? Nothing.
It's fine.

Just go deal with
Skye's bush, okay?

I'll, uh --
I'll talk to you later.

Okay.
[ Laughs ] Okay.

♪♪

Hey.

Did you know Mercury's
gonna be the closest to Earth

it's been in years
tonight?

And, well, I think
we should check it out.

Uh, listen...

Yeah?

Now that there's money
in the game,

there's like
a million dollars here,

there's a lot
of compliance issues.
Yeah?

I just...

I can't be picking favorites.

This is Quinn talking.

She said something,
didn't she?

We had a really great night.

Let's just leave it great,
okay?

Yeah.

♪♪

[ Door opens ]

Come on, ladies, let's go!

-Hey!
-We're leaving in five.

-Let's go.
-Lay off.

Things are sensitive.

You're not even
gonna be in a bikini.

It's a cocktail party.

It's not for the party --
it's for dessert.

Hey. Hey, you.

You okay?

No. Come here.

[ Hushed voice ]
Quinn messed with my game,

put me and the show
at serious risk.

So her girl, Candi,
is going down.

Can we just think about this
for one second?

You had a great game.

[ Exhales sharply ]

Just, like,
forget about Quinn.

Let's focus on in on
the yacht date, all right?

Alexi says you won't
take him to his meeting.

-Why?
-I just don't think

babysitting Alexi is
the best use of my time.

Hey. He's our star.

And I don't really trust him
in a room

full of recovering
drug addicts, okay?

So I need him out of there

the second the last
tear drop falls.

Think you can handle that?

Sure.

Thank you.

Ladies. Listen, I want to ride
over to the yacht together.

I got an idea
I want to share with you.

Come down.[ Singsong voice ]
Shimmy, shimmy, shimmy.

-[ Sighs ]
-Yes.

[ Sighs ]

[ Breathes deeply ]

♪♪

[ Exhales sharply ]

Well, so much
for the wheels of justice.

Judge said no
to any visitation rights.

Apparently kidnapping
your own kid

is kinda difficult
to come back from.

[ Chuckles ] I'm so sorry.

Yeah, well,
maybe she was right.

I didn't even know about
the stupid car seat.

Listen. Chet.

[ Exhales sharply ]

It has been just us for
a very long time, okay?

And we're good with that.

We're great.

We really are, aren't we?

I mean, we have so much
to be thankful for.

[ Laughs ]

Look at what we have
going on here.

We got all this!

"Everlasting,"
"Passport to Dance,"

"Stripper Queens."

I mean, there's not
any time for a kid.

I don't even know
what I was thinking.

It doesn't make any sense
at all. It's not our life.

We like to work.
We like to travel.

We like to do whatever
the hell we want to do,

and there's just...
you're right --

there's no place
in all of that for a kid.

Yeah.
Yeah, you're right.

[ Sighs ]

I'm pregnant.

Wait, what?

I know, I know.
[ Laughs ]

It's completely insane.

I mean, it is crazy.

Because there was a time

where I thought it was
something I actually wanted.

But then they said I couldn't,
so I was fine with it.

Or I got fine with it.

But now...

You're right, we don't have
time in our lives for a kid.

Holy shit! Yes, we do!

I'm gonna have a baby!

[ Chuckles ]

With Quinn King!

[ Chuckles ]

You magnificent goddess!

You did it.
And screw all those doctors.

You are the most powerful woman
in the whole world.

Okay, but you just said
that we don't have room
in our lives for a kid.

Since when did you
start listening to me?

I'm a baboon in a suit!

Forget all of that.
We can do anything we want!

Just as long as we're together,
we can just --

we can figure out anything.

If you want.

I mean, it's your decision.
Of course.

[ Voice breaking ] But I mean,
then we'd have to figure out

how to put in
a damn car seat.

♪♪

We're gonna be a family.

[ Sobs ] Yeah.
Yeah, we are.

I got to get on this.
I got to get a nanny and doula.

We got to get a doula.Slow down. Slow down.

I haven't even been
to the doctor yet.

You just keep doing
whatever you're doing.

I got this.

[ Laughs ] Oh, my God.
Oh my --

Oh my God, we are gonna be
the worst parents ever.

Like, the worst ever.

-Rachel!
-Hey.

Hey. Um...

Vans are heading out.
I will go talk to Candi.

Great. Great. Just, uh,
let me know how that goes.

Okay.

Oh. Hey, um...

what did you want to
talk about earlier?

Was it about Chet?

I mean, really, what's
going on with you guys?

N-Nothing.
No. It's all good.

[ Chuckles ] Yeah,
I'll see you when you get back.

Okay.

[ Door closes ]

[ Exhales sharply ]

[ Laughs ]

Oh, shit.

[ Blows whistle ]Welcome.
Our yacht date is a chance

for our sexy contestants
to see who floats their boat

and who doesn't.

Candi: [ Laughing ] Look at
all this high-end bubbly!

Whoo! Keep 'em coming,
boys!

Hey, Candi,
why don't we do a little,

you know, going over
who's who?

I mean, you really got to
know your people here --

you know,
you're the superfan.

Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah,
I got it, skipper.

So why don't we just
start with Noelle?

Let's start with Noelle.Noelle.

She's a superstar.
She was runner-up season 10,

and she's a commercial
real-estate agent.

Right? And so since you are
a residential real-estate agent,

maybe you two
could bond over that?

[ Laughs ] Okay.

I got this. I am telling you.

Hm. Okay, I really
don't think you get it.

Noelle is gunning to
get you cut tonight.

[ Hushed voice ]
I've been getting guys

to pick me my entire life.

And Rodrigo, he got a taste
of Candi last night.

And believe me,
he wants another lick.

Mm-hmm...mm-hmm...mm-hmm.

All right. Another one.

Great boat, by the way.
Whoo!

Uh...Champagne?
Seriously, Alexi?

Look, if you want to go
all rock star and relapse,

that's super cool, but wait
until after the show, okay?

'Cause this isn't just
your career you're shitting on,

Alexi -- it's mine.

Such angry words
just because of this.

This is for my lovely lady,
Sofia.

What a gentleman.

My pleasure.

How convenient.

You see, I'm sober.

Listen, next time
you have a problem,

don't go running to Mommy Quinn
like a little bitch.

You come to me.
Comprende?

Look, I'm sorry. I am sorry
to cause a...situation.

But I'm worried for you.

Then don't. I am fine.

I'll take you to
your effing meeting.

Just be in the van
by 9:00.

♪♪

Gosh, I would love
to live in London.

It's quite wonderful now
that the English have left.

-[ Laughs ]
-You know, I've always loved

New York,
but it's so expensive.

Eugh, those prices are
going through the roof.

I hear that Denver is like
really crazy, too...right?

[ Sighs ] You have no idea
who I am, do you?

What are you talking about?

I -- I'm in real estate,
and -- and so are you.

I'm in commercial
real estate.

Yeah, they did a whole episode
with Rodrigo taking me

to the Commercial Real Estate
Awards, and, um, I won.

Hello! [ Chuckles ]

You not only won,
you kicked ass!

[ Glasses clink ]

-Boom! Ohh--
-Whoa-oh!

[ Laughs ]
Sorry.

I bet you've never even
watched the show.

Oh, I think I've seen
all I need to.

Rodrigo?
Why don't we go to the bow,

watch the sunset together?

Actually, I was on my way
to the bar. Yeah.

[ Chuckles ] Really?
What the hell?

[ Indistinct chatter ]

Hey, Rodrigo.

Hey.

Hey. So, just between us,

you and Candi
killed it last night.

I mean, like,
through the roof.

#Candrigo
is trending nationwide.

Really?
Yeah.

Really?
Yeah.

Okay.

Listen, I --
I like Candi...

Right.

...but maybe
better not to rush.

What? Why?

Like, what happened?

'Cause if you, like,
walk away from Candi right now,

all those fans
that love you?

They could just
turn on you.

The other ladies,
they get together,

tell the men anyone
who picks Candi tonight,

it's adios, gone.

Next time, it's ladies'
turn to choose.

Please.

[ Scoffs ] Do you really
think that, like, any woman

on the planet is not
gonna pick you?

You're the reason all these
bimbos came back here.

You're Rodrigo.

This...is also true.

Besides, you have, like,
a real connection with Candi.

What, are you gonna just
like walk away

from a beautiful woman
just because other women

think it's like wrong
or inappropriate?

No.

Rodrigo does what he wants.

I wouldn't have it
any other way.

Uh-huh.

♪♪

[ Sighs ]

So, what, you're going
against Quinn after all?

Am I? [ Laughs ]

There is no way Noelle

came up with that cock-block
crap on her own.

She's way smarter
than you think.

Whatever.

Your little plan failed.

Candi isn't going anywhere.

We'll see. See,
that's the thing about games --

you never know
who's gonna win.

[ Inhales deeply,
exhales ]

♪♪

[ Door opens, closes ]

Ahh.

Hey, bud.

Hey.

You probably get this
all the time, but...

I just -- I got to say,
I'm a huge fan of yours.

Huge.
What?

That World Cup game
against France?

That was insane.

Oh, you saw it?
Yeah!

Are you kidding me?
In extra time,

you dribbled through
three defenders.

Great, huh?

I watched it with my dad.

It was one
of the last great moments

we had before he passed.

Wow, Tommy.

This is a beautiful story.

Thank you.

No, no, thank you.

-Uh, look, Rodrigo...
-Yeah?

I know you're Rachel's guy,
but...

there's something
I got to tell you.

I want you to post it on
my Instagram -- @thecandicoco.

What are you doing?
Please don't post that.

Let's...
Hi, boys. Gentlemen.

Get back to business.

Ugh.

So, can we get you
back out there?

No. Hell no.

I am not spending another minute

talking about moisturizers
and pilates and diets

with those
pansy-ass mannequins.

You really have to
suck it up.

If you want your own show,
you just got to make this work.

This Candi Coco.

Yeah?

She's not who
she says she is.

Well, she's superfan, right?

I don't know who she is.

There's a whole lot they
don't tell me, but...

she's a plant.

I can smell it.

You think that
I can't take this?

I'm just saying that it requires
a certain mental stamina,

putting yourself out there,
getting rejecting,

and coming back --
some people aren't built for it.

Come on, you know
how these shows work.

Either she's been in
a prison,

or she's your crazy
ex-girlfriend's sister.

But Candrigo!

Rachel says we explode
on social media!

Yeah, well, maybe that
was for the wrong reasons.

I can keep 200 guys
on the edge of their seats

with just one pole.

Oh, really?
For like, what, 20 minutes?

I'm talking about
10 hours a day.

I mean, "Stripper Queens"
is gonna be even more.

She's trying to trick you,
to humiliate you.

And when her true identity
is revealed,

America's gonna be
laughing at you.

I think they're
probably laughing now.

Just because I'm a professional
athlete, I am stupid?

America's a tough place.

That's what makes us great.

I can outlast whatever you

or any of these other bitches
throw my way.

So watch out.
I can do it.

-Okay, great.
-Yeah.

Well, I just got Rodrigo
back on the Candi Express.

It's up to you
to seal the deal.

Don't let Candi
get away with this.

Don't worry.
Rodrigo knows what to do.

Thanks for being, like,
such a sister, sister.

Ah, no problem. You want
some coffee or anything?

Mnh. I am so good.

Oh, good.

Can I get some cameras up?

[ Indistinct conversations ]

-What?
-[ Chuckling ] Hi.

Hi, there, stranger.

What do you say you and I,
we get out of here, huh?

Take your hands off me.
Hm?

I don't just go with
strange women, Candi Coco.

If that's even
your real name.

Of course [chuckles nervously]
that is my real name.

And you weren't asking
for ID last night.

My mistake.

You want to make fun
of Rodrigo Velasquez, hm?

Why would I make fun
of you?

TV actor who pretends
to love me just like a cheap,

stinking whore.

Thank you!

Okay, I'm not the one
with like the $3 cologne

and this stupid
sparkle shirt.

I'm an international
superstar.

You're nothing but
cheap American white trash.

Hey, you don't get to
talk like that to me

and then just
get to walk away!

I treat you like who you
really are -- lying puta!

Screw you,
you hypocritical son of a bitch!

[ People gasping ]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Man overboard!

-Rodrigo, no!
-Somebody stop the boat!

Who's next, huh?!

Anyone else here
want to call me a whore?!

Nicole?!

Good luck with that
at the elimination.

Men don't marry crazy.

I see you, girl.

Man: Okay, ladies, I think
we've had enough to drink --

-No, I'm good! I'm good!
-Okay! All right!

Oh, wow. [ Laughs ]

[ [ Door opens ] ]

Hey. Hi. So, listen.
We need to talk.

How'd it go with Candi?

Oh, my God, well, I got you
a WTF moment for the ages.

Candi literally, like,
shoved Rodrigo

and the guy fell
into the bay.

Did you get it on camera?

Of course, I got it on camera.Amazing.

But the guys are all saying
that Candi's crazy now,

and they're literally calling
her Cuckoo for Candi Coco Puffs.

[ Laughs ]
That's really funny, actually.

Yeah, but unfortunately,

she is gonna be toast
at the Elimination Ceremony.

No, she's stealing the show.
She's incredible.

Quinn, I'm telling you.
I talked to all the guys.

None of them will touch her.

Oh, come on,
there is always one schmuck

who's willing
to take the bait.

I mean, you would think,
but not with these All-Stars.

Well, there is one guy here
who's not exactly an All-Star.

No. I told you,
I'm saving him for episode four.

Hey, this could just
tee up episode four.

Keep that shit show
still intact.

You know how you
can get in with him.

I'm glad we're back.

♪♪Me, too.

♪♪

Gentlemen. Let's get you
on the stairs.

Now. Please. A half-circle
right around there.

-Thank you.
-[ Sighs ]

Nice. Hey,
have you got a sec?

Yeah, sure. [ Sighs ]

Were me and Skye were making
too much noise last night?

I'm telling you,
those walls are thin.

Not really.

Um, look, I hate to even
be bringing this up, but...

What?
You and Maya.

There's, like, a bunch
of rumors out there.

[ Chuckles ]
What rumors?

Like, I don't know even know
the whole story,

but something about when
you guys got together,

that maybe Maya was drunk,
you know,

like too drunk to consent?

Oh, God.

I know it's not true.

But a lot of the other ladies
are starting to talk,

and I just don't want to see you
cut early...

or reported.

Reported? No.
I did nothing wrong.

Okay, that's why we need to
get in front of this right now

and we need to turn it around
and change the narrative.

If we say anything,
it'll make things worse.

Not necessarily.

I have an idea,
and if you play it right,

you could be bulletproof
for the rest of the season.

♪♪

Everybody in positions.
Please, ladies,

if we can tighten up
these spaces.

Please and thank you.
Thank you, ladies.

Just define "ladies."

How about
"perky-titted bitch

who's about to get a Jimmy Choo
parked up her ass"?

And we're off.

[ Theme music plays ]

I believe it was Camus
that said that,

"Life is the sum
of all of your choices."

And here, on "Everlasting,"

can you agree that you're abot
to make a life-changing choic?

Camus? I need it written
in Graham's contracts

that he is not allowed
to read any books ever.

This is why
we don't win Emmys.

Señor Rodrigo,
your decision, por favor.

Ugh. Please, somebody,
if you have a tranquilizer dart,

shoot him now.

Right in the neck.

The last time I chose,
I chose wrong.

But now, I correct
a mistake in the past.

[ Chuckles ] Did anyone
understand what he just said?

I don't think
he understood it.

Can we have subtitles?

Noelle, will you spend
the night with Rodrigo?

[ Chuckles ]
Of course.

Ugh.

Graham: Comrade Alexi?

I knew I felt something special
in my first kiss with Sofia.

So, there you go, Quinn --
you got your superstar.

It's a real love story.

Have you been standing there
the whole time?

Will you continue
this journey with m?

Yes. [ Chuckles ]

Oh, my angel.

-Mwah!
-Mwah!

Graham: August?

August: Uh...

Maya, care to share

a hammock with me
this evening,

watch the Perseids
light up the night sky?

Absolutely.

[ Chuckles ]

Jack: Skye,

will you spend
the night with me?

Hot dog!
Let's do it.

Aw. Looks like Jack
will be spending the night

under an open Skye.[ Both laugh ]

And Roger [British accent]
you are the last bloke up.

You know, they say
that a bird in the hand

is worth two in the bush.

I'm sorry, is he using
an accent?

Which bird will be joining you
in your suite tonight?

Will it be the beautiful swan,
Miranda?

Or the charismatic cockatiel,
Candi Coco?

Um. We're cutting it
a little close here,

don't you think,
Rachel?

[ Clears throat ]
Well...

This is a tough oe
indeed.

Today I had the pleasure
of spending time

with a very lovely
young woman, Miranda.

Quinn: What is Jack the Ripper
doing, exactly?

Just wait.

My every thought driftd

towards spending the nigt
with you, until...

Candi,
your hot-blooded temper

may have offended some,

but the way Rodrigo
spoke to you was inexcusable.

Disgraceful. And, Graham,

I don't know about you,
but nothing sickens me more

than seeing a woman degraded
and publicly shame.

And I -- I just can't
stand idly by and allow Candi

or -- or any woman
to be victimized

while everyone else
just looks the other way.

Yeah.
Damn right.

The time has come to stand up
and fight for equality,

for mutual respect,
and for clear-eyed justice.

This is what a feminist
looks like.

What?!
[ Laughing ]

That's so gorgeous!

Boom! I mean, come on!

You can't write crap
like that!

Actually, you can.

[ Laughing ] Oh, my God.

Roger: So Candi Coco,

will you spend the night with me, safe and unafraid?

Yes, please.
[ Laughs ]

♪♪

[ Whispering ]
I'm still here, you bitc.

Sometimes crazy wins.

Roger the rapist,
a feminist hero?

That might be your greatest
magic trick yet.

You think?

You continue to blow my mind.
Seriously.

Ah, man.
Can you beat this, huh?!

This is like the greatest night
of my life, straight up.

Yeah, it's crazy, but if
Quinn's happy, I'm happy.

Man.

They said she couldn't
have a baby, you know?

Well, she's proved the doctors
wrong, you know?

Right. Yeah, no.
The baby.

Quinn's gonna be a mommy,

and you're gonna be
the weirdo auntie.

Oh, this is incredible.

Thank you.
You're always there.

[ Chuckles ]

I'll see you later.

I was so addicted.

The drugs were all
I thought about.

I would have done anything
to get my next fix,

and I did horrible things.

I'm so ashamed.

It's hard to ask
for forgiveness.

I hurt so many people.
But by far,

the hardest person to ask
for forgiveness was...

♪♪

myself.

[ Applause ]

Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you, guys.

♪♪

Oh. I saw the [laughs] --

the the footage
from the yacht date,

and Rodrigo's "lying puta"

is going to play
like gangbusters.

[ Laughs ]

You're pregnant?

Chet just called me weirdo
auntie for the first time.

I am.

What?

I don't know,
it's just like,

this whole time today
that you were really happy,

I kinda thought it was
because it was, you know,

us again -- you and me.

This doesn't change
anything with us.

This? What, you mean the baby
that you didn't tell me about?

Uh, I wanted to.
This morning.

Remember?
I was having doubts.

Which somehow
just magically disappeared,

and you decided you
didn't want me to know.

That's right.

Why not?

You know [scoffs]
because for a tiny moment,

I was enjoying it.
And honestly,

I didn't want you to
rain on my parade.

I knew exactly
what you would say.

What? The truth?
That this is crazy?

You can't even keep it
under five drinks a day, Quinn.

How are you gonna do this?

You know what, hold on a second
while I go get my umbrella.

I'm just saying that some women
are not meant to be mothers

and you're one of them.
And that's fine.

Wow. Thanks.

Are you seriously
considering this?

Oh, my God. Dude,
I will just take you

right now to the clinic.
Let's just get in my car.

All right, you know what?
You don't decide for me, Rachel.

Chet is thrilled.
And so am I.

And the truth is,

this is about myfamily,
and that's not you.

♪♪

[ Door slams ]

Damn, Goldberg.
This is you celebrating?

I figured you would be
popping Champagne with Quinn.

[ Indistinct chatter ]

You know what?

She did mess with
your challenge.

With a tube
of contestant lube.

Don't worry,
I got your back.

♪♪

[ Keyboards clicks,
monitor beeps ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Door opens ]

Set it up over here.

What the hell is this?

Well, I started the day off
wanting to see my child,

and now I actually get to.

Dr. Gerard.

Uh...
[ Laughs ]

I could've gone
in the morning.

I'm sorry.
I just couldn't wait.

[ Chuckles ]

[ Chuckles ]

Oh, Chet.

Hey.
Mercury, huh?

Rachel.

Look,
Maya's waiting for me.

Okay, well, you were right.

Quinn did say something.

But the truth is,

this has nothing
to do with her.

♪♪

Oh, my God.
Is that it?

Indeed.

Would you look at that?

Back together a month,
already a baby on the way.

I knew we struck gold
off Guadeloupe!

It always should've
been this way.

Always, Quinnie.

[ Chuckles ]

Uh, Chet, would you mind
if me and mama

talked lady stuff
for a minute alone?

Everything's fine.

Whatever my baby needs,
my baby gets --

Babies.

Is everything okay?

Yes.

It's just that Chet
mentioned that you were

together a month,
so, um...

I have to ask...

Are you absolutely sure
he's the father?

[ Laughs ]
Of course. Why?

Because you're a lot more
pregnant than you think.

♪ Hey, boy, hey, boy

[ Moaning passionately ]

♪ When will you go?

[ Both panting ]♪ I'm going where
the cold wind blows ♪

It's beautiful.

♪ In the pines, in the pines

Oh. You are.

♪ Where the sun
don't ever shine ♪

You are.

♪ Hey, boy, hey, boy

♪ Don't lie to me

♪ Tell me where did you sleep

[ Sighs ]

♪ Last night?

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪