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1
00:00:09,944 --> 00:00:18,550
♪♪
2
00:00:18,552 --> 00:00:27,159
♪♪
3
00:00:30,765 --> 00:00:34,166
♪♪
4
00:00:37,772 --> 00:00:46,044
♪♪
5
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:54,252
♪♪
6
00:01:05,466 --> 00:01:06,398
[ up-beat music plays ]
here we go!
7
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:08,400
Here we go! Here we go!
8
00:01:08,602 --> 00:01:10,002
♪♪
9
00:01:10,004 --> 00:01:11,670
[ record scratch ]
hey, what the [bleep] now?
10
00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:13,538
Get back there, get back there.
Get back there.
11
00:01:13,540 --> 00:01:15,674
Band: 5, 6, 7, go!
12
00:01:15,876 --> 00:01:16,809
♪♪
13
00:01:17,011 --> 00:01:18,877
Come on, come on!
14
00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,346
I'm the new nigga
in this mother[bleep]
15
00:01:21,548 --> 00:01:23,749
King kong ain't got
shit on me!
16
00:01:25,152 --> 00:01:26,885
What's good, my goon?
Let's get it!
17
00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:29,354
Let's get it, let's get it,
let's get it!
18
00:01:29,356 --> 00:01:31,556
[ cheers and applause ]
let's go! Let's go!
19
00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:34,359
Okay.
20
00:01:34,561 --> 00:01:36,361
Hey, reese.
Anybody ever tell you
21
00:01:36,563 --> 00:01:37,762
You look like
barbra streisand
22
00:01:37,964 --> 00:01:39,364
[bleep] a klingon.
23
00:01:39,366 --> 00:01:40,365
That's [bleep] up.
24
00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:42,501
You look like
[bleep] medusa drowned.
25
00:01:42,703 --> 00:01:44,302
[ laughter ]
a'ight.
26
00:01:44,304 --> 00:01:47,572
Quick impression
of reese witherspoon.
27
00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:49,174
[ farts ]
that's what you sound like.
28
00:01:49,176 --> 00:01:51,043
That's how you sound like
to me, also.
29
00:01:51,245 --> 00:01:54,246
You sound like
a post-chipotle fart to me.
30
00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:55,380
Damn.
31
00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:58,783
And you basically look
32
00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,185
Like mother[bleep] --
33
00:02:00,387 --> 00:02:02,921
You look like the cowardly lion
from "the wiz."
34
00:02:02,923 --> 00:02:05,858
Nah,
you look like, oh...
35
00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:07,392
You know
who you look like?
36
00:02:07,394 --> 00:02:09,594
You look like
a cracked-out...
37
00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:11,463
Uh, what's -- what's --
38
00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:13,465
♪♪
39
00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:19,938
♪♪
40
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:26,078
♪♪
41
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:28,681
Hey, buddy.
No tow trucks here.
What's that?
42
00:02:28,883 --> 00:02:31,349
See that sign?
No tow trucks.
43
00:02:31,351 --> 00:02:32,484
I gotta tow you,
brother.
44
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:34,486
I gotta get my stuff.
45
00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:36,955
My bag's in there.
46
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:38,557
Yo, where you going,
mad max?
47
00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:39,824
Well, I gotta get
my stuff.
48
00:02:40,026 --> 00:02:42,094
I don't need excuses.
I need you to read the sign.
49
00:02:42,296 --> 00:02:43,295
Well, I read the sign.
50
00:02:43,297 --> 00:02:44,697
Tell me what it says.
51
00:02:44,899 --> 00:02:46,631
It says no tow trucks.
Well, there you go.
52
00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:48,233
Listen, buddy,
it's yom kippur.
53
00:02:48,235 --> 00:02:50,235
By sundown, I gotta be at home
eating with my wife.
54
00:02:50,437 --> 00:02:51,836
Eh...
55
00:02:52,038 --> 00:02:53,505
I get all
the high holidays off.
56
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:55,173
Well, it is what it is.
You know, I'll just...
57
00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:56,508
How about this?
58
00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:57,910
We will take your truck
off the tow right now
59
00:02:58,112 --> 00:02:59,812
If I can watch you
kiss your wife.
60
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:05,450
Huh?
61
00:03:05,652 --> 00:03:06,718
I don't have to
touch anybody.
62
00:03:06,721 --> 00:03:08,220
I'll be 12 feet away.
63
00:03:09,323 --> 00:03:10,589
I have a girlfriend.
64
00:03:10,591 --> 00:03:12,725
I can send an uber right now,
pick up your girlfriend,
65
00:03:12,927 --> 00:03:14,459
I watch you guys kiss,
66
00:03:14,461 --> 00:03:15,928
And what I do
is my business.
67
00:03:16,130 --> 00:03:18,396
Let me call her real quick.
Hold on.
68
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:19,732
[ dialing tones ]
call her up.
69
00:03:19,934 --> 00:03:22,066
Hello?
Woman: Hi.
70
00:03:22,069 --> 00:03:23,736
Uh, hey, babe.
Sorry to call right now,
71
00:03:23,938 --> 00:03:26,605
But there's some weird stuff
going on over here.
72
00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:28,340
This guy's trying
to make a deal with me
73
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:31,076
That they will take the truck
off the other truck
74
00:03:31,278 --> 00:03:35,213
If you are willing to come
over here and kiss.
75
00:03:35,415 --> 00:03:36,481
What?
76
00:03:36,483 --> 00:03:37,882
That's -- that's --
77
00:03:38,084 --> 00:03:39,952
That's the deal
he's making.
78
00:03:40,154 --> 00:03:43,221
They want -- they want me to come over there...
79
00:03:43,423 --> 00:03:46,625
Yes. He says he just wants
to see my girlfriend kiss.
80
00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:48,693
He'll send an uber over.
81
00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:49,762
I'll drive.
82
00:03:49,964 --> 00:03:51,764
[ fanfare plays ]
you'll drive?
83
00:03:51,966 --> 00:03:53,498
Send me the address.
84
00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,367
I'm coming down, so what is it?
85
00:03:55,369 --> 00:03:57,502
Eric: We're gonna have fun
tonight, baby!
86
00:04:04,311 --> 00:04:07,379
Ladies and gentlemen,
chanel west coast!
87
00:04:07,381 --> 00:04:10,248
♪♪
88
00:04:10,450 --> 00:04:12,517
Hello!
What's up, sunshine?
89
00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:14,153
How you doing,
my little biscuit?
90
00:04:15,790 --> 00:04:18,323
Have a seat.
What's up, chicken mama?
91
00:04:18,325 --> 00:04:19,924
You a big ol'
chicken mama.
92
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:21,794
[ laughs ]
[bleep] I love that bitch.
93
00:04:21,996 --> 00:04:24,863
Your birth name is
chelsea greenberg leventhal,
94
00:04:24,865 --> 00:04:26,731
And you changed it
so you would seem less jewish.
95
00:04:26,733 --> 00:04:28,801
No, my real name
is chelsea chanel dudley.
96
00:04:29,003 --> 00:04:31,336
And then your grandfather
was bugle boy alaska.
97
00:04:31,538 --> 00:04:33,071
No.
So, you're
a trust fund kid,
98
00:04:33,073 --> 00:04:34,939
And you just basically
inherited all your money
99
00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:37,676
And chanel west coasted
your way through life?
100
00:04:37,678 --> 00:04:39,277
No, I had a single mom.
101
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:40,813
Ooh! Yummy!
102
00:04:41,015 --> 00:04:42,214
You want some?
103
00:04:44,485 --> 00:04:46,485
Can you identify
this body?
104
00:04:46,487 --> 00:04:48,487
Oh, lord.
105
00:04:48,689 --> 00:04:51,356
Um...
I cannot identify the body.
You know him?
106
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:53,625
You know him?
I don't know him.
107
00:04:53,828 --> 00:04:55,093
I-is he dead?
108
00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:57,295
I ain't dead yet, mother[bleep]
chanel: Oh, my god.
109
00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:58,630
What?
110
00:04:58,632 --> 00:04:59,964
[ cheers and applause ]
shit.
111
00:05:00,167 --> 00:05:02,767
Look at him.
That's my son! Oh!
112
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:05,370
Doing good, son.
Doing good.
113
00:05:05,372 --> 00:05:06,771
Look at him!
Watch this.
114
00:05:06,773 --> 00:05:09,174
It's no nips November.
115
00:05:09,176 --> 00:05:10,442
Wait. What the [bleep]
116
00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:12,444
I have no nipples.
117
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:13,912
That has to be
just makeup.
118
00:05:13,914 --> 00:05:15,447
No, I have no nipples.
What?
119
00:05:15,649 --> 00:05:16,915
I've never
shown you this?
120
00:05:16,917 --> 00:05:19,317
Why do you not have nipples?
It's a genetic thing.
121
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,186
Incredible. [ chuckles ]
[ applause ]
122
00:05:21,388 --> 00:05:23,455
That's reese witherspoon.
123
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,724
Wait, what?
I am reese witherspoon.
124
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:27,459
That's who exactly I am.
[ applause ]
125
00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:29,194
Man: [ muffled ]
can you hear me?
126
00:05:29,196 --> 00:05:32,264
Hey, can you get me
out of here, please?
127
00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:33,932
Let me out of here, please!
128
00:05:33,934 --> 00:05:35,800
I've been in here!
I'm stuck!
129
00:05:35,802 --> 00:05:37,269
[ sobbing ] can you hear me?
130
00:05:37,271 --> 00:05:38,737
Shut the [bleep] up.
131
00:05:40,607 --> 00:05:42,074
[ laughing ] wha--
man: Oh, please.
132
00:05:42,076 --> 00:05:43,208
[ gunshots ]
oh!
133
00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:48,012
How you doing?
Hey. How you doing?
134
00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:50,148
Can you help me just rake
some of these leaves?
135
00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:51,416
I'm just trying
to build a pile here.
136
00:05:51,618 --> 00:05:53,218
My partner
dropped out on me.
137
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:55,888
It's rosh hashanah,
so he took the day off.
Right.
138
00:05:58,292 --> 00:05:59,958
Be careful, them [bleep]
got thorns on 'em.
139
00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:01,226
Hey, could you
do me a favor?
140
00:06:01,228 --> 00:06:02,695
'cause I can't reach it.
See that?
141
00:06:02,897 --> 00:06:04,629
Yeah, yeah.
Grab that and push it.
142
00:06:04,831 --> 00:06:06,431
Right now.
Yeah, yeah.
143
00:06:06,633 --> 00:06:07,432
Yeah.
144
00:06:10,304 --> 00:06:13,238
Turn it, turn it, turn it,
turn it, turn it, turn it!
145
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:14,306
Turn it, turn it,
turn it, turn it!
146
00:06:14,308 --> 00:06:16,174
Turn it!
Which way?
147
00:06:16,176 --> 00:06:17,175
Turn it the other way!
148
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:18,977
Turn it the other way!
Turn it the other way!
149
00:06:18,979 --> 00:06:19,912
Oh, shit!
150
00:06:20,114 --> 00:06:21,246
God damn, man!
151
00:06:21,248 --> 00:06:24,449
Why did my partner
take off for rosh hashanah?!
152
00:06:24,651 --> 00:06:26,251
Man, come help me,
mother[bleep]
153
00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:27,786
Turn it the other way.
God damn. Let me go get help.
154
00:06:27,988 --> 00:06:29,654
No, no, no, no!
Aah!
155
00:06:29,856 --> 00:06:31,055
I don't know how
to turn it off.
Oh, shit!
156
00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:32,056
Help me!
157
00:06:34,395 --> 00:06:35,728
God damn!
158
00:06:38,733 --> 00:06:42,935
Greenberg valley chippers --
quality since 1973.
159
00:06:43,137 --> 00:06:45,470
This guy was a writer
on "30 rock."
160
00:06:45,672 --> 00:06:47,005
Donald glover.
161
00:06:49,143 --> 00:06:51,377
God, you look
[bleep] handsome.
162
00:06:52,813 --> 00:06:54,413
You get over here,
you son of a bitch.
163
00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:57,149
Donald "jp morgan"
glover.
164
00:06:57,151 --> 00:06:58,951
Now, you grew up
in atlanta,
165
00:06:59,153 --> 00:07:00,885
Or that's just a bit
for the show?
166
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:02,621
I grew up there.
167
00:07:02,823 --> 00:07:04,489
Or you're from
glendale?
168
00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:07,826
No, I grew up...
I grew up in atlanta.
169
00:07:08,028 --> 00:07:08,827
Prove it.
170
00:07:09,029 --> 00:07:10,329
I... How?
171
00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:15,500
[ spits ] what's the last nice
thing you did for your mother?
172
00:07:15,502 --> 00:07:16,769
I hung out with her...
173
00:07:16,771 --> 00:07:19,638
Can you not gender
your parents, either?
174
00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,373
I mean, be a little
more progressive.
175
00:07:21,575 --> 00:07:22,907
I'm so progressive,
176
00:07:22,909 --> 00:07:25,043
I don't even know which one
of my parents is my father
177
00:07:25,045 --> 00:07:26,445
And which one is
the white one.
178
00:07:28,182 --> 00:07:31,450
Are men white
and women are black?
179
00:07:31,652 --> 00:07:33,852
I don't think
that's how it works.
180
00:07:33,854 --> 00:07:36,254
Oh! Shit!
Damn.
181
00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:38,256
I didn't know you like
to get wet, player.
182
00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:41,126
I don't...
183
00:07:44,398 --> 00:07:45,930
Man, you really got me.
184
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:47,666
Hey, I just scratched
my butthole.
185
00:07:49,336 --> 00:07:50,535
Is that what
smells like that?
186
00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:52,937
Yeah, I shit
on my hands.
187
00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:54,473
You know what I mean?
188
00:07:54,475 --> 00:07:57,009
I know...
Baby boy!
189
00:07:57,211 --> 00:08:00,479
I don't wanna do that.
I don't wanna do that.
190
00:08:00,481 --> 00:08:01,480
You know what I mean?
191
00:08:01,482 --> 00:08:03,882
Oh, people know you
from the time
192
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:07,752
That you shat in a toilet
in a home depot display.
193
00:08:07,954 --> 00:08:10,355
It wasn't me.
It was someone else.
194
00:08:10,357 --> 00:08:12,691
So, you were just watching
another man defecate?
195
00:08:12,693 --> 00:08:13,958
It was a kid.
We weren't men.
196
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,161
You were watching
a child defecate.
197
00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:17,496
I was also a kid,
so it was okay.
198
00:08:17,498 --> 00:08:19,364
You were also filming it?
No.
199
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:20,365
So, you were
just staring.
200
00:08:20,567 --> 00:08:23,235
You were locking eyes
with this young boy.
201
00:08:23,437 --> 00:08:24,636
I'm gonna say
7-year-old boy.
202
00:08:24,839 --> 00:08:26,771
But I was a kid
when it happened.
203
00:08:26,973 --> 00:08:27,840
17, 18?
204
00:08:28,042 --> 00:08:29,374
No. Like 10 years old.
Okay.
205
00:08:29,376 --> 00:08:31,643
So it wasn't like a d.C. Sniper
kind of relationship.
206
00:08:31,846 --> 00:08:32,911
No.
That would be bad.
207
00:08:32,913 --> 00:08:34,913
Free the d.C. Sniper.
Right?
208
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:37,049
[ cheers and applause ]
no, I don't wanna do that.
209
00:08:37,051 --> 00:08:39,718
Come on, man, stay black.
Stay black.
210
00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:41,653
I really don't want
to be a part of it.
211
00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:43,522
At least say "free r. Kelly"
to camera.
212
00:08:43,724 --> 00:08:44,656
I'm not doing that.
213
00:08:44,859 --> 00:08:46,458
Free my man putin.
Free putin.
214
00:08:46,460 --> 00:08:47,860
He's not in jail.
Free putin.
215
00:08:48,062 --> 00:08:49,928
Well, when he goes
to jail, free him.
216
00:08:49,930 --> 00:08:52,197
Why is the black power sign
for putin?
217
00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:53,198
Putin's black.
Putin's black.
218
00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:54,399
He's not black.
219
00:08:54,601 --> 00:08:56,000
Me, I support
black people.
220
00:08:56,002 --> 00:08:57,001
You? I don't know.
221
00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:58,203
Yeah.
Okay.
222
00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:01,206
Now, your father
is danny glover,
223
00:09:01,408 --> 00:09:03,942
And your mother
is donald rumsfeld.
224
00:09:04,144 --> 00:09:06,278
What's it like being
a hollywood insider
225
00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:07,746
And a washington insider?
226
00:09:07,748 --> 00:09:10,348
No. Like, I mean,
my dad is -- was donald glover.
227
00:09:10,551 --> 00:09:11,816
Hoo-hoo!
228
00:09:11,818 --> 00:09:12,885
You want some
breast milk?
229
00:09:13,087 --> 00:09:14,352
No, I'm okay.
230
00:09:14,555 --> 00:09:17,155
You sure?
It's organic.
231
00:09:17,357 --> 00:09:20,292
Mmm. [ slurps ]
232
00:09:20,294 --> 00:09:22,160
-Makes my mouth water.
-Mmmmm.
233
00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:24,563
-Ugh.
-[ slurps ]
234
00:09:24,765 --> 00:09:27,566
Ugh.
Ooh, gosh.
235
00:09:27,568 --> 00:09:29,367
-That's yummy.
-Hey, hey.
236
00:09:29,370 --> 00:09:30,903
They're just gonna
touch you up.
Hey, boss.
237
00:09:30,905 --> 00:09:34,573
Gonna touch you up today.
Come on, pop.
238
00:09:34,575 --> 00:09:36,641
I don't really...
Let me put a little
makeup on you.
239
00:09:37,111 --> 00:09:39,043
I'm -- I don't --
I'm, like...
240
00:09:39,045 --> 00:09:40,312
I got you.
Oh, okay.
241
00:09:40,314 --> 00:09:42,314
I got you.
You're okay.
242
00:09:42,316 --> 00:09:44,182
Now, we just gonna touch you up
a little bit right here.
243
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:46,251
How come you all sweaty?
What you pullin'?
244
00:09:46,453 --> 00:09:48,520
Ain't you one of those
milli-menials or whatever?
245
00:09:48,522 --> 00:09:51,123
[ scoffs ] what?
246
00:09:51,125 --> 00:09:52,391
You got any blow?
247
00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:54,126
No, I don't have
any blow.
248
00:09:54,128 --> 00:09:55,660
Check your pockets
a minute.
I definitely don't.
249
00:09:55,662 --> 00:09:58,663
♪ hey, hey
I've got this song in my head.
250
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:00,933
I gotta get this shit.
251
00:10:01,135 --> 00:10:02,667
We don't believe in covid
on this set.
252
00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:03,802
No one's tested.
253
00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:05,537
[ coughing ]
she looks great.
254
00:10:05,539 --> 00:10:07,272
-See you all later, huh?
-Alright.
255
00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:08,540
I'll be out of here.
[ applause ]
256
00:10:08,742 --> 00:10:11,944
♪ get some blow today,
hey, hey, what do you say? ♪
257
00:10:12,146 --> 00:10:14,146
♪ I'm gonna get
some blow today ♪
258
00:10:14,348 --> 00:10:16,949
♪♪
259
00:10:17,151 --> 00:10:20,685
What up, y'all?
Lil' lep in the building, y'all!
260
00:10:20,887 --> 00:10:23,355
Yes, sir, he's gonna
grant you 69 wishes.
261
00:10:23,557 --> 00:10:24,423
You guys match,
kind of.
262
00:10:24,625 --> 00:10:25,758
Y'all try to hit
this shit.
263
00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:28,026
We're still good.
Bro, this is
a four-leaf clover.
264
00:10:28,228 --> 00:10:29,561
No, I'm -- I'm good, man.
265
00:10:29,563 --> 00:10:31,095
You a bitch, though.
You ain't tryin' to hit.
266
00:10:31,098 --> 00:10:32,897
Hey, come on, man.
267
00:10:33,099 --> 00:10:35,500
I just don't smoke
as much as I used to.
268
00:10:35,702 --> 00:10:37,102
Are you trying
to get me high?
269
00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:38,503
I ain't no
fairy tale, you know.
270
00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:39,972
That's very clear.
You're very real.
271
00:10:39,974 --> 00:10:41,706
Man,
y'all pussies, man!
272
00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:43,842
Oh, my favorite rapper's here.
What up, buddy?
♪ I'm a mad man
273
00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:45,844
♪ never had green eggs
and ham, damn ♪
274
00:10:45,846 --> 00:10:47,312
Nobody gonna get my gold!
275
00:10:47,514 --> 00:10:49,314
He's got gold?
I'll get you one of these days,
lil' lep.
276
00:10:49,516 --> 00:10:50,649
-You'll never catch me!
-Yo, shit.
277
00:10:50,851 --> 00:10:51,916
Just a pussy.
278
00:10:52,118 --> 00:10:53,652
Forget y'all, then!
Alright.
279
00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:55,320
-Aah!
-I'll be out.
18310
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