Original subtitles

Yo, look, I'm here.

Yeah, I'm gonna do it this time, okay?

Scott isn't even around. He's at work till, like, five, so the coast is clear.

Oh my god, his dad is in New York.

Or somewhere.

Look, this is why his mom is gonna be all over my nuts.

Ah, yeah, whatever, delusional.

Look, yeah, I know.

Scott's my pal, but look.

I'm a motherfucker. Yeah, we know this.

Actually, you know what?

I'm the... I'm the MILF Whisperer.

Yes.

Oh, this is gonna be great. Look, all I need you to do is just call in five

minutes.

Just call my phone. No questions, okay?

And don't say a word about this to Scott. I swear to God, I will...

that one time in... Yeah, that's right.

All right.

Look.

She's expecting me. I'm going to get this book.

I'm going to lay my moves on her.

Everything's going to go great.

All right?

Thank you.

Hey there.

Hey. How's it going?

Doing fine. Yeah, come on in.

Thanks. Of course. Here, take a seat.

Yeah, I know. Yeah.

I'm sorry?

I already paid for the books.

Oh,

cool. Thanks. You know, I don't want to buy new books. It's taking the same

class and all.

Right. Save money.

Save material. Why not?

Yeah. No problem.

So, what have you been up to other than school?

Been busy. I haven't seen you forever.

I was beginning to think you didn't like me or something.

Oh.

It wasn't that, actually.

I have a girlfriend.

You do? Yeah.

So I've been busy with that.

Really? Yeah. That's awesome. That's great. Is it serious?

I would say so. I mean, I think she's the one.

Really? Yeah. That's very serious.

I gotta take, though.

Wow, well, congratulations. Thank you, yeah.

That's a lot.

Yeah, no, I think that, like I said... Oh, sure.

Sorry. No, of course.

Hello?

Oh, hey, baby.

Yeah, um... Yeah, I got a moment.

What?

Why?

That's... Look, I can improve.

I didn't mean to... Can I... What

was that

about? Are you okay?

What's wrong?

What's the matter?

She broke up with me.

The girlfriend?

The one you just said was the one?

Yeah.

What happened?

She... She said I was an awkward kisser.

What? And awkward in general.

This always happens to me.

God,

my life sucks.

No, it doesn't.

I'm sorry.

You gonna be okay?

I don't know.

Everything lately has just been shitty and not my luck.

No? Bad luck, huh?

You'll be alright.

Yeah? Yeah.

We'll find out really soon.

True or not.

I hear a good voice around.

I think she's the one going to be missing out. That was pretty damn good.

See? Everything's already looking up, huh?

I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself.

I didn't mean to. I should go. No.

Wow.

She's going to definitely be missing out.

I get over things quick.

I can see that and feel that.

You like that huh?

You like to fucking swallow your cock huh?

Fuck yeah.

Take this shit off.

Fuck yeah.

Oh yeah.

Oh yeah.

Those big old fucking titties. You like that, huh?

Fuck yeah.

That's so fucking good.

Oh yeah.

You want me to suck your cock tonight?

You've been wanting this happen to you.

Me too.

Your cock should be bigger than my fucking husband.

Fuck yeah.

Oh my god.

Fuck yeah.

Fuck yeah.

Fuck yes.

I can't do something about them.

Fuck you.

Fuck.

Oh, God.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, shit. Oh, my God.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Just before we reference this and all of this.

Fuck you.

Oh god, fuck me.

Fuck you. Do it again.

One more time. Come on.

Fuck me.

Fuck me.

Fuck me.

Oh god.

Oh god.

Fuck that cunt.

You rubbed your girlfriend over that.

Who?

Good answer.

Happy birthday. Oh, thank you.

Nice of you. Well, I'm going to go clean myself up. Yeah, no worries. Know your

way out. Yeah, I'm going to make a phone call.

Okay, okay.

Don't tell my son. Yeah, of course.

And especially not my husband. Oh, I got you. Yeah, yep.

See you soon.

Yo, hey, dude.

Guess who struck again?

The Melf Whisperer.

I think it's pretty cool. Shut up, dude.

I did it. It was awesome.

Yeah, it's going to be great.

I got some pictures.