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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
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2
00:00:53,596 --> 00:00:54,396
Sorry.
3
00:00:54,472 --> 00:00:56,141
- It's okay.
- Yeah.
4
00:00:58,852 --> 00:01:00,692
Hey, Nate, we're leaving.
5
00:01:03,189 --> 00:01:04,441
Okay.
6
00:01:05,775 --> 00:01:06,726
Can I just put it in?
7
00:01:06,735 --> 00:01:08,695
No, put a condom on.
8
00:01:08,903 --> 00:01:12,073
- Michelle, I don't think it's...
- Nate, put a condom on.
9
00:01:14,075 --> 00:01:15,720
You know what? It's fine.
I'll just go down on you.
10
00:01:15,744 --> 00:01:19,289
No, it's fine,
just stop shaking.
11
00:01:19,497 --> 00:01:20,497
I'm not shaking.
12
00:01:26,755 --> 00:01:28,423
Okay, right.
13
00:01:28,631 --> 00:01:30,133
- Uh-huh.
- Okay.
14
00:01:32,260 --> 00:01:34,220
Wake up. We are going.
15
00:01:35,096 --> 00:01:36,096
Fucking...
16
00:01:37,682 --> 00:01:38,722
I think as I fingered you,
17
00:01:38,808 --> 00:01:39,869
my hands are, like,
super slippery.
18
00:01:39,893 --> 00:01:41,644
- Just give it to me.
- Okay.
19
00:01:43,438 --> 00:01:44,623
Only these stupid free ones they
give you at the health center
20
00:01:44,647 --> 00:01:46,357
are impossible to open.
21
00:01:46,566 --> 00:01:48,651
Oh, okay, thanks.
22
00:01:48,860 --> 00:01:49,860
Okay.
23
00:01:50,820 --> 00:01:52,405
All right.
24
00:01:52,614 --> 00:01:53,323
Okay.
25
00:01:58,787 --> 00:02:00,497
Yo, Nate, you awake?
26
00:02:00,705 --> 00:02:01,748
What?
27
00:02:01,956 --> 00:02:03,836
We're going to breakfast.
You wanna come?
28
00:02:04,292 --> 00:02:06,169
No. Well...
29
00:02:06,377 --> 00:02:08,630
- You wanna have breakfast?
- No.
30
00:02:08,838 --> 00:02:10,757
- No, we're good.
- All right.
31
00:02:10,965 --> 00:02:12,342
Yeah.
32
00:02:13,301 --> 00:02:14,301
I'm just...
33
00:02:14,427 --> 00:02:15,446
Nate, do you have it?
34
00:02:15,470 --> 00:02:16,679
Yeah, almost, yeah.
35
00:02:19,432 --> 00:02:20,433
Come on, fuck it.
36
00:02:22,519 --> 00:02:24,119
Hey, did I leave
my bong in there?
37
00:02:24,312 --> 00:02:27,565
No, there's no fucking bongs
in here, man.
38
00:02:27,774 --> 00:02:30,235
All right, dude.
Fuck.
39
00:02:46,459 --> 00:02:47,585
What?
40
00:02:57,428 --> 00:02:58,847
What do you think
the problem is?
41
00:03:01,891 --> 00:03:04,144
I don't know. It's...
It's not like physical or...
42
00:03:05,687 --> 00:03:08,898
I don't know, it's so stupid.
It's like fucking stupid.
43
00:03:09,816 --> 00:03:11,359
Okay, are...
44
00:03:11,568 --> 00:03:13,486
Are you nervous or...?
45
00:03:13,695 --> 00:03:15,697
No, I'm not nervous.
I just... I don't...
46
00:03:26,291 --> 00:03:27,834
Maybe it's just...
47
00:03:31,212 --> 00:03:32,439
I don't know,
maybe you're just not
48
00:03:32,463 --> 00:03:33,840
the right girl for me.
49
00:03:36,259 --> 00:03:37,259
What?
50
00:03:38,553 --> 00:03:40,096
Yeah, I don't know, maybe...
51
00:03:40,263 --> 00:03:41,806
Maybe that's all it is, just...
52
00:03:41,973 --> 00:03:43,725
I don't know.
53
00:03:46,519 --> 00:03:47,520
Are you serious?
54
00:03:49,397 --> 00:03:50,732
Uh...
55
00:03:50,940 --> 00:03:52,817
Wait, um, I don't know. Uh...
56
00:03:53,026 --> 00:03:54,194
You don't know?
57
00:03:55,445 --> 00:03:57,280
Okay. Oh, shit.
58
00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:04,746
What?
59
00:04:04,954 --> 00:04:07,582
I cannot believe that you are
blaming me for your problems.
60
00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:09,542
I'm not the right girl for you?
61
00:04:10,501 --> 00:04:12,378
No, I'm not blaming anyone,
I'm just...
62
00:04:13,338 --> 00:04:14,648
- I'm just... I don't know...
- What?
63
00:04:14,672 --> 00:04:15,337
A lot of people
aren't right for each other.
64
00:04:15,340 --> 00:04:16,549
It's not a big deal.
65
00:04:16,758 --> 00:04:18,402
Okay, so what? You wanna
stop seeing me? Is that it?
66
00:04:18,426 --> 00:04:19,636
No, of course not.
67
00:04:19,844 --> 00:04:22,472
Wow, you are an asshole, Nate.
68
00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:24,307
Just because you are
skinny and awkward
69
00:04:24,474 --> 00:04:25,993
that doesn't make you
a nice guy, okay?
70
00:04:26,017 --> 00:04:27,352
You're a fucking asshole.
71
00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:30,605
Well, you were kind
of pressuring me.
72
00:04:30,813 --> 00:04:32,653
I am so sorry that I wanted you
to do something
73
00:04:32,732 --> 00:04:34,776
other than go down on me
for once.
74
00:04:34,984 --> 00:04:36,694
I thought girls like that.
75
00:04:36,903 --> 00:04:38,238
Not when you're bad at it.
76
00:04:45,620 --> 00:04:47,956
So, can I call you later or...
77
00:05:03,471 --> 00:05:04,271
Hello?
78
00:05:04,389 --> 00:05:06,474
Yo, Nate, it's Kahji.
79
00:05:06,683 --> 00:05:08,559
Hey, Kahji, what's up, dude?
80
00:05:08,726 --> 00:05:11,354
I just wanted to make sure you
and Alec were all set for today.
81
00:05:12,563 --> 00:05:13,815
Today?
What do you mean?
82
00:05:14,023 --> 00:05:16,526
Today is my wedding, dawg.
Did you forget?
83
00:05:16,734 --> 00:05:18,736
Shit.
84
00:05:21,656 --> 00:05:23,533
No, of course not, man, I...
85
00:05:23,700 --> 00:05:25,580
We'll be there.
It's been on my calendar.
86
00:05:25,660 --> 00:05:26,744
Sweet.
87
00:05:26,911 --> 00:05:28,751
I'll text you the address
and information again
88
00:05:28,830 --> 00:05:29,830
to make sure you have it.
89
00:05:29,956 --> 00:05:31,708
Stoked to see you, boys.
90
00:05:31,916 --> 00:05:33,543
Stoked to see you, too, buddy.
91
00:05:33,710 --> 00:05:35,295
Keep it chinchilla.
92
00:05:41,843 --> 00:05:43,553
Kahji is getting married today.
93
00:05:55,356 --> 00:05:56,649
Fuck me.
94
00:06:28,097 --> 00:06:29,432
Hello.
95
00:06:31,684 --> 00:06:32,727
Hey, puppies.
96
00:06:32,935 --> 00:06:34,771
- Hi.
- Hi!
97
00:06:34,979 --> 00:06:36,773
Oh, my gosh, you made
such good time.
98
00:06:36,981 --> 00:06:38,941
There's no traffic.
It was the craziest thing.
99
00:06:39,150 --> 00:06:41,778
- Hey, how's it going?
- Oh, look at you!
100
00:06:41,986 --> 00:06:42,779
Hey.
101
00:06:43,780 --> 00:06:45,573
- Hey.
- You are taller.
102
00:06:45,782 --> 00:06:46,884
- Really?
- I think you're...
103
00:06:46,908 --> 00:06:48,034
I feel taller, yeah.
104
00:06:48,242 --> 00:06:50,054
Hey, did you like the sign
I put on the front door?
105
00:06:50,078 --> 00:06:51,871
I did, yeah.
Did you make that today?
106
00:06:53,581 --> 00:06:55,517
I texted you like two hours ago
that I was coming home.
107
00:06:55,541 --> 00:06:57,478
Yeah, and I ran to the store
and got all your favorites.
108
00:06:57,502 --> 00:06:59,379
Orange juice, Goldfish,
Gatorade, everything.
109
00:07:00,129 --> 00:07:01,422
- Sweet.
- Yes.
110
00:07:01,631 --> 00:07:03,150
So what do you wanna do?
Do you wanna watch a movie?
111
00:07:03,174 --> 00:07:03,966
Do you wanna go to a movie?
112
00:07:04,175 --> 00:07:05,426
We could hike with the dogs.
113
00:07:05,635 --> 00:07:07,075
We could also
go play putt-putt or...
114
00:07:07,136 --> 00:07:08,388
You're making a face.
115
00:07:08,596 --> 00:07:10,699
Yeah, I'm actually busy today,
I'm going to a wedding.
116
00:07:10,723 --> 00:07:12,058
I meant to tell you,
but I forgot.
117
00:07:12,266 --> 00:07:13,434
- Oh, you are?
- Yes.
118
00:07:13,643 --> 00:07:14,643
Uh...
119
00:07:14,727 --> 00:07:16,020
It was a super
last-minute thing,
120
00:07:16,187 --> 00:07:17,998
but, yeah, I got to go,
I'm going to be busy all day.
121
00:07:19,565 --> 00:07:21,901
Oh, that's... well, that's kind
of neat going to a wedding.
122
00:07:22,110 --> 00:07:22,777
That's fun.
123
00:07:22,985 --> 00:07:24,821
- Yeah.
- Great.
124
00:07:25,029 --> 00:07:26,447
Well, good.
125
00:07:27,615 --> 00:07:28,801
- Yeah.
- It's good to see you, though.
126
00:07:28,825 --> 00:07:30,135
- So great you're home.
- I'm so excited.
127
00:07:30,159 --> 00:07:30,952
Do you have...
Is the breakfast ready?
128
00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:32,495
I'm starving.
129
00:07:34,831 --> 00:07:37,112
I don't understand why are you
going to this guy's wedding
130
00:07:37,166 --> 00:07:38,835
if you aren't really
friends with him.
131
00:07:39,043 --> 00:07:40,795
Thank you, gracias.
132
00:07:41,587 --> 00:07:42,606
I mean,
we were friends with him.
133
00:07:42,630 --> 00:07:43,630
He was just like...
134
00:07:44,632 --> 00:07:46,151
He was just, like,
this really weird friend
135
00:07:46,175 --> 00:07:48,719
that we hung out with in
the high school, I don't know.
136
00:07:48,886 --> 00:07:51,167
Alec and I are kind of going
as a joke more than anything.
137
00:07:51,264 --> 00:07:52,515
Alec is going?
138
00:07:52,723 --> 00:07:54,016
Uh-huh.
Yeah, it's me and him.
139
00:07:54,225 --> 00:07:55,225
Oh.
140
00:07:56,978 --> 00:07:58,688
What?
141
00:07:58,855 --> 00:08:01,175
I don't know, I just thought
maybe you and Alec grew apart.
142
00:08:01,691 --> 00:08:04,026
Why do you still think
Alec is such a bad kid?
143
00:08:04,235 --> 00:08:06,612
Remember Susan Miller's son
who had to transfer schools
144
00:08:06,821 --> 00:08:08,739
because Alec
used to call him a faggot?
145
00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:11,492
Mom, that was
like eight years ago.
146
00:08:12,785 --> 00:08:14,513
And that kid used to tuck
his pants into his socks.
147
00:08:14,537 --> 00:08:17,039
That is no reason
to call someone a faggot.
148
00:08:18,124 --> 00:08:19,459
It's just a hate speech, Nate.
149
00:08:19,667 --> 00:08:21,335
Might I remind you,
you have a gay uncle.
150
00:08:21,544 --> 00:08:22,712
I know.
151
00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:24,380
- Hey, Nate.
- Hey, Dad.
152
00:08:24,589 --> 00:08:26,466
- Jesus.
- Allegedly gay.
153
00:08:30,219 --> 00:08:31,012
Dad, he's gay.
154
00:08:31,220 --> 00:08:32,220
- He's gay.
- Yeah.
155
00:08:33,181 --> 00:08:33,973
Whatever.
156
00:08:34,182 --> 00:08:36,434
Jim, Nate was just telling me
157
00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:39,604
that he has a girlfriend
he's seeing at school.
158
00:08:40,605 --> 00:08:42,565
Yeah, I mean, she's not, like,
my girlfriend.
159
00:08:42,773 --> 00:08:44,213
We're just sort of seeing
each other.
160
00:08:44,317 --> 00:08:45,985
Well, I looked her up
on Facebook,
161
00:08:46,194 --> 00:08:48,779
and she is cute as a button.
162
00:08:48,946 --> 00:08:50,490
Mom, don't look her up
on Facebook.
163
00:08:50,698 --> 00:08:52,408
That makes me
super uncomfortable.
164
00:08:52,617 --> 00:08:54,577
I just picked her out
in a couple group shots
165
00:08:54,744 --> 00:08:56,424
and read a little bit
about her "About Me,"
166
00:08:56,621 --> 00:08:57,955
and then I liked
one group photo.
167
00:08:58,122 --> 00:08:59,266
- That was it.
- You liked a photo?
168
00:08:59,290 --> 00:09:00,750
It was a group shot.
169
00:09:00,958 --> 00:09:02,168
Oh, shit.
170
00:09:02,376 --> 00:09:03,169
Do you follow her?
171
00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:04,795
She'll think
I'm somebody's aunt.
172
00:09:05,004 --> 00:09:07,882
No, We have the same last name.
She's going to know it's you.
173
00:09:08,090 --> 00:09:10,968
Don't like any photos.
No social media.
174
00:09:11,177 --> 00:09:12,428
Delete your accounts.
175
00:09:12,637 --> 00:09:13,846
You don't need Facebook.
176
00:09:14,055 --> 00:09:14,847
I don't do the Facebook.
177
00:09:15,056 --> 00:09:16,158
I don't have time
for the Facebook.
178
00:09:16,182 --> 00:09:17,618
Okay, I will go in
and unlike it.
179
00:09:17,642 --> 00:09:19,077
She will never...
I did it like eight minutes ago.
180
00:09:19,101 --> 00:09:20,228
Don't unlike it.
181
00:09:20,436 --> 00:09:21,145
She'll notice that you liked it
and unliked it.
182
00:09:21,354 --> 00:09:22,674
Just don't... I don't know how...
183
00:09:22,813 --> 00:09:25,691
Just please delete
your accounts, please.
184
00:09:27,235 --> 00:09:29,487
And what the hell is going on
with your car, anyway?
185
00:09:29,695 --> 00:09:31,255
I looked inside,
there's fast-food bags,
186
00:09:31,322 --> 00:09:32,073
there's cups everywhere,
187
00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:33,783
you can't even see
the damn floor.
188
00:09:33,950 --> 00:09:35,550
I mean, it's kind
of disrespectful to us,
189
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:36,827
Nate, seriously.
190
00:09:37,036 --> 00:09:38,764
Dad, how many times I told you
to get me a beater.
191
00:09:38,788 --> 00:09:39,997
I didn't want a car that nice.
192
00:09:40,206 --> 00:09:41,486
You knew I was going
to trash it.
193
00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:44,001
What did we do wrong?
194
00:09:44,210 --> 00:09:46,570
I mean, what teenager complains
about driving a Range Rover?
195
00:09:46,671 --> 00:09:48,148
When I was a kid, my parents
didn't have the money
196
00:09:48,172 --> 00:09:49,507
to buy me a goddamn thing.
197
00:09:49,715 --> 00:09:51,235
You know where I slept
when I was a baby?
198
00:09:51,259 --> 00:09:52,802
I do, please tell me again.
199
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:55,721
In a drawer, in their dresser
200
00:09:55,930 --> 00:09:57,090
that they stuffed blankets in
201
00:09:57,139 --> 00:09:58,599
'cause they couldn't afford
a crib.
202
00:09:59,850 --> 00:10:01,828
Dad, what difference does that
make to you if you're a baby?
203
00:10:01,852 --> 00:10:03,121
You have no memories
when you're a baby.
204
00:10:03,145 --> 00:10:04,145
That makes no sense.
205
00:10:05,064 --> 00:10:06,148
I got memories, kid.
206
00:10:08,234 --> 00:10:09,569
It's ready.
207
00:10:13,698 --> 00:10:15,116
Thank you.
208
00:10:15,324 --> 00:10:16,843
The drawer thing is getting
a little stale, honey, just...
209
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:18,136
I'm just trying
to make a point, babe.
210
00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:19,537
All right, guys.
211
00:10:19,745 --> 00:10:20,745
It's good to see you.
212
00:10:20,788 --> 00:10:22,123
- You're leaving already?
- Yeah.
213
00:10:22,290 --> 00:10:25,167
I told Alec I'd meet up with him
before 12:00, so I gotta go.
214
00:10:25,376 --> 00:10:26,853
- It's good seeing you, Dad.
- All right, kid.
215
00:10:26,877 --> 00:10:29,213
- Bye.
- Honey, you just got here.
216
00:10:29,422 --> 00:10:31,007
I know, I'll come home more,
I promise.
217
00:10:32,300 --> 00:10:33,527
Thank you so much for breakfast,
218
00:10:33,551 --> 00:10:35,219
Isabelle, thank you so much
for breakfast.
219
00:10:35,428 --> 00:10:36,468
Love you guys, bye.
220
00:10:37,179 --> 00:10:38,347
Bye.
221
00:10:38,556 --> 00:10:40,766
You are gonna be sober
at this wedding, right?
222
00:10:42,685 --> 00:10:43,894
What?
223
00:10:44,103 --> 00:10:45,289
I just know how crazy
Alec can get when he drinks.
224
00:10:45,313 --> 00:10:46,673
I don't want you
to get in trouble.
225
00:10:48,691 --> 00:10:49,734
We won't, I promise.
226
00:10:52,194 --> 00:10:53,194
Okay.
227
00:10:54,822 --> 00:10:56,490
All right.
Love you, guys. Bye.
228
00:10:56,699 --> 00:10:57,992
- Bye.
- Bye.
229
00:11:00,703 --> 00:11:02,204
He's not gonna be sober.
230
00:11:23,392 --> 00:11:24,644
- Hmm...
- Hey, Val.
231
00:11:27,021 --> 00:11:30,066
Well, look who's here,
the college boy.
232
00:11:30,274 --> 00:11:31,776
Yeah. Oh, sorry.
233
00:11:34,236 --> 00:11:37,281
So how are you liking school?
234
00:11:37,448 --> 00:11:39,325
It's good, I like it a lot.
It's a lot of fun.
235
00:11:39,533 --> 00:11:40,826
Oh, I bet.
236
00:11:41,035 --> 00:11:43,245
I'm sure the girls got
their hands all over you.
237
00:11:44,372 --> 00:11:45,372
Uh, I don't know.
238
00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:47,833
Well, I can't say I blame them.
239
00:11:51,879 --> 00:11:52,879
What?
240
00:11:52,922 --> 00:11:53,922
Yo.
241
00:11:54,048 --> 00:11:55,317
- Hey, what's up buddy?
- What's up, dude?
242
00:11:55,341 --> 00:11:56,425
Good to see you, man.
243
00:11:56,634 --> 00:11:58,844
Good to see you too, man.
What the fuck is this?
244
00:11:59,053 --> 00:12:00,471
You a vest guy now?
245
00:12:00,680 --> 00:12:02,282
Is this all the frat guys are
wearing at rich kid university?
246
00:12:02,306 --> 00:12:03,724
Stop touching me.
It's a nice vest.
247
00:12:03,933 --> 00:12:05,410
No, it's beautiful.
I'm just fucking with you, man.
248
00:12:05,434 --> 00:12:08,020
Hey, Mom, could you make us
some snacks?
249
00:12:09,188 --> 00:12:10,856
What do you expect me to make?
250
00:12:11,732 --> 00:12:14,068
You know, just some snacks.
251
00:12:15,111 --> 00:12:16,237
Like what kind of snacks?
252
00:12:16,445 --> 00:12:18,030
We have the... the... the pizza,
253
00:12:18,239 --> 00:12:20,157
the bagels with the pizza on it
in the freezer.
254
00:12:20,366 --> 00:12:23,119
I don't know how to make fucking
pizza bagels, just...
255
00:12:23,285 --> 00:12:24,912
God, go to the Quick Mart.
256
00:12:25,121 --> 00:12:26,247
All right, Mom, forget it.
257
00:12:27,331 --> 00:12:28,374
Fuck.
258
00:12:36,048 --> 00:12:38,134
Oh, bam, dude.
Fuck, yes.
259
00:12:38,342 --> 00:12:39,444
How do you shoot it
like that?
260
00:12:39,468 --> 00:12:41,303
You just gotta push
your joystick.
261
00:12:41,512 --> 00:12:42,823
This one,
you're flicking left.
262
00:12:42,847 --> 00:12:43,990
Why are there two...
This one?
263
00:12:44,014 --> 00:12:45,454
It's the right joystick,
tard.
264
00:12:45,599 --> 00:12:46,599
Oh.
265
00:12:47,685 --> 00:12:49,287
Dude, you know,
I was thinking about tonight
266
00:12:49,311 --> 00:12:51,151
and I really don't wanna go
to Kahji's wedding.
267
00:12:51,188 --> 00:12:52,523
I say we don't go.
268
00:12:52,732 --> 00:12:54,251
- Don't go to Kahji's wedding?
- I say we blow it off, dude.
269
00:12:54,275 --> 00:12:55,585
Just go get fucked up
or something.
270
00:12:55,609 --> 00:12:56,889
No, no, no, dude, we have to go.
271
00:12:57,069 --> 00:12:58,547
That'll break his heart
if we don't go.
272
00:12:58,571 --> 00:12:59,947
No, it won't.
273
00:13:00,156 --> 00:13:01,591
We weren't even really friends
with him in high school, dude.
274
00:13:01,615 --> 00:13:03,242
I haven't seen him
since graduation.
275
00:13:04,076 --> 00:13:05,828
We could do something fun,
like go to a bar.
276
00:13:06,036 --> 00:13:07,329
What bar is going to let us in?
277
00:13:07,496 --> 00:13:09,456
Dude, don't worry about it,
I got plenty of spots.
278
00:13:09,582 --> 00:13:11,625
Dude, stop. You don't have
any fucking spots.
279
00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:14,670
Every time you say,
"Oh, I know some bouncer.
280
00:13:14,879 --> 00:13:16,519
I know some guy
who's going to let us in,"
281
00:13:16,630 --> 00:13:17,965
You fucking don't,
282
00:13:18,174 --> 00:13:20,254
and we always end up
getting fucked up for no reason.
283
00:13:20,342 --> 00:13:21,719
Let's just go to the wedding.
284
00:13:21,927 --> 00:13:23,367
Dude, I really
don't wanna see Kahji,
285
00:13:23,429 --> 00:13:24,972
and his weird fucking family,
286
00:13:25,181 --> 00:13:27,850
and his mom who's strangely hot.
287
00:13:28,058 --> 00:13:29,619
I mean, I think
it's going to be fucking lame.
288
00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:31,621
Plus, you know, what if his mom
is looking really good,
289
00:13:31,645 --> 00:13:33,147
and I drink
a little too much and...
290
00:13:33,355 --> 00:13:34,515
I end up wanting to fuck her?
291
00:13:34,607 --> 00:13:35,709
I won't be able
to control myself at that point.
292
00:13:35,733 --> 00:13:37,210
Yeah, you're right.
No, she'll be down.
293
00:13:37,234 --> 00:13:38,736
No, I see the face,
I see the face,
294
00:13:38,944 --> 00:13:40,255
you're super fucking pretty,
dude.
295
00:13:40,279 --> 00:13:41,465
She'll be down for sure.
We really shouldn't go.
296
00:13:41,489 --> 00:13:42,549
- You know what?
- You're right.
297
00:13:42,573 --> 00:13:43,967
Make fun of me now, dude,
but you won't
298
00:13:43,991 --> 00:13:45,910
when you walk in on me
fucking her doggy style
299
00:13:46,118 --> 00:13:47,118
like it's my job.
300
00:13:51,290 --> 00:13:53,417
Do you know this is going to be
his first kiss?
301
00:13:53,626 --> 00:13:55,336
The fuck are you talking about,
dude?
302
00:13:55,544 --> 00:13:57,522
Today at the wedding,
it's going to be the first time
303
00:13:57,546 --> 00:13:58,339
Kahji has ever kissed a girl.
304
00:13:58,547 --> 00:13:59,298
I swear to God.
305
00:13:59,507 --> 00:14:00,716
That's bullshit.
306
00:14:00,883 --> 00:14:02,323
Swear to God,
that's what he told me.
307
00:14:02,384 --> 00:14:04,196
Him and this girl he's dating
are both super religious,
308
00:14:04,220 --> 00:14:05,655
so they wanted to wait
until the priest says,
309
00:14:05,679 --> 00:14:07,532
"You may now kiss the bride"
to have their first kiss.
310
00:14:07,556 --> 00:14:09,183
It's what he told me.
Swear to God.
311
00:14:09,391 --> 00:14:10,726
That's the stupidest
fucking thing
312
00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:12,228
I've ever heard in my life.
313
00:14:12,436 --> 00:14:13,914
Yeah, but think about how funny
it's going to be to watch.
314
00:14:13,938 --> 00:14:15,147
Let's just go, man.
315
00:14:15,356 --> 00:14:17,209
There's nothing else to do
around here, anyway, please.
316
00:14:17,233 --> 00:14:18,442
Please.
317
00:14:18,651 --> 00:14:20,128
Please, please, please,
it'll mean so much to him.
318
00:14:20,152 --> 00:14:21,237
All right, fine.
Fuck.
319
00:14:21,445 --> 00:14:23,113
We'll go the wedding, man.
320
00:14:23,322 --> 00:14:24,322
Thank you.
321
00:14:29,495 --> 00:14:31,413
I actually might fuck
his mom, though.
322
00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:37,419
Dude, you want me to drive?
323
00:14:37,586 --> 00:14:39,296
Oh, yeah, sure.
324
00:14:39,505 --> 00:14:40,505
Knock yourself out.
325
00:14:40,631 --> 00:14:41,799
Oh shit, hold on.
326
00:14:42,007 --> 00:14:43,167
What?
What? What? What?
327
00:14:43,300 --> 00:14:44,093
Nothing, my neighbor's
just outside, man.
328
00:14:44,301 --> 00:14:46,053
I don't... I don't want him
to see me.
329
00:14:47,388 --> 00:14:48,848
Why not?
330
00:14:49,056 --> 00:14:51,308
I don't know dude,
he's just an asshole.
331
00:14:51,517 --> 00:14:52,536
Fuck, all right, come on.
332
00:14:52,560 --> 00:14:54,228
Just be quick.
Maybe he won't see us.
333
00:14:54,436 --> 00:14:55,436
Okay.
334
00:15:00,526 --> 00:15:02,170
Dude, what the fuck,
where's the hole?
335
00:15:02,194 --> 00:15:03,213
It's a button, dude.
It's a button.
336
00:15:03,237 --> 00:15:04,363
All right. Shh.
337
00:15:04,572 --> 00:15:05,281
Shit.
338
00:15:05,489 --> 00:15:07,241
Hey, Alec.
339
00:15:07,449 --> 00:15:08,534
Fuck.
340
00:15:10,411 --> 00:15:11,871
Hey, Tommy.
341
00:15:14,415 --> 00:15:16,166
God damn it.
342
00:15:22,590 --> 00:15:24,234
You know, we're
in a pretty serious drought.
343
00:15:24,258 --> 00:15:26,427
I think your grass might be
green enough there, Tommy.
344
00:15:26,635 --> 00:15:28,429
What are you, a landscaper now?
345
00:15:28,596 --> 00:15:30,347
No, I'm an environmentalist.
346
00:15:30,556 --> 00:15:31,556
Do me a favor, okay?
347
00:15:32,516 --> 00:15:34,143
Can you stop openly trying
to avoid me?
348
00:15:34,310 --> 00:15:35,102
It's insulting.
349
00:15:35,269 --> 00:15:36,371
I'm not trying to avoid you.
350
00:15:36,395 --> 00:15:37,755
I just think you're
the kind of guy
351
00:15:37,897 --> 00:15:40,178
that maybe appreciate your space
more than most, you know?
352
00:15:41,191 --> 00:15:43,944
When am I going to get the money
for my car, Alec?
353
00:15:44,153 --> 00:15:45,487
It's been two weeks already.
354
00:15:45,696 --> 00:15:47,507
Tommy, I'm going to get you
your money for your car, okay?
355
00:15:47,531 --> 00:15:48,532
I promise.
356
00:15:48,741 --> 00:15:50,135
You know how annoying it is
not to be able
357
00:15:50,159 --> 00:15:51,159
to open my front door?
358
00:15:51,285 --> 00:15:52,411
Every time I wanna get in,
359
00:15:52,620 --> 00:15:53,847
I got to climb in
through the window
360
00:15:53,871 --> 00:15:55,551
like I'm in the fucking
"Dukes of Hazzard."
361
00:15:57,124 --> 00:15:58,435
Dude, what the fuck are
The Dukes of Hazzard?
362
00:15:58,459 --> 00:16:00,127
Don't be a smartass, Alec.
363
00:16:00,336 --> 00:16:02,188
I know you think you can weasel
your way out of this somehow,
364
00:16:02,212 --> 00:16:03,464
but you can't.
365
00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:06,800
If I don't get that money
by noon tomorrow,
366
00:16:07,009 --> 00:16:08,289
I'm gonna walk over
to your house
367
00:16:08,344 --> 00:16:10,137
and tell your mother
that you backed into it
368
00:16:10,304 --> 00:16:11,555
while you were drunk.
369
00:16:11,764 --> 00:16:14,934
Don't, man, I'm going to get you
your money, okay?
370
00:16:16,185 --> 00:16:18,020
You better hope so, Alec.
371
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:19,480
You better fucking hope so.
372
00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,574
Goddamnit, dude.
What is this shit?
373
00:16:30,783 --> 00:16:32,618
Why do you trash this car, man?
374
00:16:32,826 --> 00:16:34,186
- I don't know.
- Why do you do it?
375
00:16:34,370 --> 00:16:35,370
I'm sorry.
376
00:16:36,163 --> 00:16:37,498
What happened
with your neighbor?
377
00:16:37,706 --> 00:16:39,124
Oh...
378
00:16:40,626 --> 00:16:43,295
I fucking backed up
into his car the other night
379
00:16:43,504 --> 00:16:44,964
when I was super fucked up.
380
00:16:45,172 --> 00:16:47,299
Dude, you need to stop drinking
and driving, man.
381
00:16:47,508 --> 00:16:48,508
I know.
382
00:16:49,468 --> 00:16:51,028
I owe that dude three grand
for his car.
383
00:16:51,053 --> 00:16:52,221
It's fucking ridiculous.
384
00:16:52,429 --> 00:16:53,429
Fuck.
385
00:16:56,392 --> 00:16:58,519
Yo, is there any way you can,
like, loan me the money?
386
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,689
I mean, I'll pay you back
as soon as I can.
387
00:17:03,232 --> 00:17:04,650
No, I mean, I would,
388
00:17:04,858 --> 00:17:07,653
but, like, my parents they check
my credit card accounts, so...
389
00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:09,381
I can call them
and explain the situation-
390
00:17:09,405 --> 00:17:10,572
I mean, they might...
391
00:17:10,781 --> 00:17:11,573
Maybe they'll
help you out, I don't know.
392
00:17:11,782 --> 00:17:13,283
No, I don't want
your mom hating me
393
00:17:13,492 --> 00:17:15,160
any more than she already does.
394
00:17:16,412 --> 00:17:17,412
Whatever, let's just go.
395
00:17:34,722 --> 00:17:38,017
Dude, I mean, the fucking idiot
was parked on the curb.
396
00:17:38,225 --> 00:17:39,385
That's fucking illegal, okay?
397
00:17:39,435 --> 00:17:40,787
There's...
No wonder I would've...
398
00:17:40,811 --> 00:17:43,272
I would have fucking
hit it if I was sober.
399
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:45,524
Dumbass drug dealer.
He's a fucking drug dealer.
400
00:17:45,733 --> 00:17:48,110
I didn't tell you that,
he's a fucking drug dealer.
401
00:17:48,318 --> 00:17:50,404
And he makes me feel
like I'm the bad guy.
402
00:17:50,612 --> 00:17:51,697
It's ridiculous.
403
00:17:52,531 --> 00:17:54,033
Dude, every...
404
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:55,321
What are you fucking doing?
405
00:17:55,409 --> 00:17:56,409
- Hey.
- Huh?
406
00:17:56,577 --> 00:17:57,619
What are you doing?
407
00:17:58,579 --> 00:18:00,956
I'm posting a video
on my Snap story.
408
00:18:01,123 --> 00:18:02,207
Dude, don't do that, man.
409
00:18:02,416 --> 00:18:03,810
That's just a fucking tool
the government uses
410
00:18:03,834 --> 00:18:05,252
to constantly survey us.
411
00:18:05,461 --> 00:18:08,297
Little camera on the front?
It's not just for selfies.
412
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:10,340
Delete the app, okay?
413
00:18:10,549 --> 00:18:12,301
I can't dude,
I'm already addicted.
414
00:18:12,509 --> 00:18:14,237
Plus, my pledge bros and I
are trying to streak a hundred.
415
00:18:14,261 --> 00:18:15,471
We're super-close.
416
00:18:15,679 --> 00:18:16,679
Pledge bros?
417
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:20,285
Yeah, pledge bros, they're
the guys that you pledge with
418
00:18:20,309 --> 00:18:21,477
before you get initiated.
419
00:18:22,269 --> 00:18:24,188
It's a fraternity thing,
it's hard to explain.
420
00:18:25,147 --> 00:18:28,233
Yeah, dude, sounds
super bro-ey and awesome.
421
00:18:29,818 --> 00:18:31,129
When are you going
to invite me up, man?
422
00:18:31,153 --> 00:18:33,256
- I wanna meet these pledge bros.
- I will, man.
423
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:34,531
Uh...
424
00:18:34,740 --> 00:18:35,741
When?
425
00:18:37,367 --> 00:18:39,036
Soon, man, I'm...
426
00:18:39,244 --> 00:18:40,724
I just been
like crazy busy, you know?
427
00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:43,415
How are the girls?
428
00:18:43,624 --> 00:18:45,250
- Super hot.
- Fuck.
429
00:18:45,417 --> 00:18:47,336
Do you remember Machelle Lone
from high school?
430
00:18:47,544 --> 00:18:48,295
- Yeah.
431
00:18:48,504 --> 00:18:49,704
Me and her are kind of dating.
432
00:18:51,381 --> 00:18:52,508
What? Really?
433
00:18:52,716 --> 00:18:53,716
Yeah.
434
00:18:55,594 --> 00:18:56,887
That's...
435
00:18:57,096 --> 00:18:58,615
I didn't even know you guys
went to the same school.
436
00:18:58,639 --> 00:18:59,848
She's your girlfriend?
437
00:19:00,057 --> 00:19:03,352
I don't know if you'd say
boyfriend-girlfriend, but...
438
00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:06,021
Yeah, I mean, no,
she's my girlfriend.
439
00:19:06,188 --> 00:19:07,648
Yeah, she's my girlfriend
for sure.
440
00:19:07,856 --> 00:19:09,149
Why?
441
00:19:09,358 --> 00:19:10,358
What do you mean why?
442
00:19:10,526 --> 00:19:11,878
Why would you have
a girlfriend in college?
443
00:19:11,902 --> 00:19:13,403
That's like...
444
00:19:13,612 --> 00:19:14,892
It's a rookie mistake,
my friend.
445
00:19:15,656 --> 00:19:17,217
Well, fuck, dude,
I thought you'd be stoked.
446
00:19:17,241 --> 00:19:18,801
Machelle was really cool
in high school.
447
00:19:18,867 --> 00:19:20,887
Dude, hookah bars were cool
in the high school, man.
448
00:19:20,911 --> 00:19:22,746
But you don't see us
doing that shit anymore.
449
00:19:24,540 --> 00:19:26,392
Come on, you're never thinking
about all the girls
450
00:19:26,416 --> 00:19:28,627
you could be getting down with
at these frat parties?
451
00:19:29,503 --> 00:19:30,605
I mean, not really,
to be honest, dude.
452
00:19:30,629 --> 00:19:33,132
Like, she's pretty fucking cute.
453
00:19:34,216 --> 00:19:35,509
Let me ask you something.
454
00:19:35,717 --> 00:19:37,862
Do you have any specific
memories of brushing your teeth?
455
00:19:37,886 --> 00:19:38,886
Of brushing my teeth?
456
00:19:38,971 --> 00:19:40,347
Brushing
your fucking teeth.
457
00:19:40,556 --> 00:19:42,876
Yeah, I have plenty of memories
of brushing my teeth, Alec.
458
00:19:42,933 --> 00:19:45,185
No, I'm talking
about one specific memory
459
00:19:45,394 --> 00:19:47,154
of brushing your teeth.
Can you think of one?
460
00:19:47,813 --> 00:19:49,613
- I don't know, I guess not.
- Exactly.
461
00:19:50,315 --> 00:19:52,234
Because it's something
you do every day.
462
00:19:52,442 --> 00:19:53,610
Your brain gets so used to it
463
00:19:53,819 --> 00:19:56,238
that it doesn't make
any new memories from it, right?
464
00:19:56,446 --> 00:19:57,656
- Right.
- Okay.
465
00:19:57,823 --> 00:20:00,659
So, therefore, having sex
with the same girl every day
466
00:20:00,868 --> 00:20:02,244
over and over and over again
467
00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:04,079
isn't gonna make
any new memories either,
468
00:20:04,288 --> 00:20:05,557
and you're gonna regret it
when you're old
469
00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:07,381
that you didn't
take advantage of being young.
470
00:20:07,833 --> 00:20:10,210
Change is a good thing, my man.
471
00:20:10,419 --> 00:20:12,379
You can't make every day
become the same cycle,
472
00:20:12,588 --> 00:20:13,828
or it's all gonna be forgotten.
473
00:20:14,506 --> 00:20:16,675
Unless you save it all
on your Snap story.
474
00:20:16,884 --> 00:20:18,564
Right, just like every other
fucking retard
475
00:20:18,635 --> 00:20:20,304
in our generation.
476
00:20:22,014 --> 00:20:23,908
So where are we going?
What are we doing right now?
477
00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:26,560
We're going to smoke.
478
00:20:28,604 --> 00:20:29,730
You can if you want, man.
479
00:20:29,938 --> 00:20:31,541
I haven't really been smoking
that much lately.
480
00:20:31,565 --> 00:20:33,565
Well, that's too bad
'cause I just bought an eighth
481
00:20:33,650 --> 00:20:35,652
of the dankest weed
I've ever smoked in my life.
482
00:20:37,654 --> 00:20:38,447
Dude, what are you doing
buying weed
483
00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:39,883
when you owe
your neighbor money?
484
00:20:39,907 --> 00:20:41,301
Oh don't worry, man.
I'm gonna pay him back.
485
00:20:41,325 --> 00:20:42,510
I just thought that, you know,
486
00:20:42,534 --> 00:20:43,761
we can fucking
get high together.
487
00:20:43,785 --> 00:20:44,804
I haven't seen you
in months, dude.
488
00:20:44,828 --> 00:20:45,954
This is going to be fun.
489
00:20:48,624 --> 00:20:49,791
What kind of weed is it?
490
00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:51,400
Oh, I don't know.
Let me check, man.
491
00:20:52,252 --> 00:20:54,755
Purple Mountain Donkey Cock.
492
00:20:56,340 --> 00:20:57,466
What, dude?
493
00:20:57,674 --> 00:20:59,314
No, I don't fucking know
what it's called.
494
00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:00,761
It's just smokey, come on.
495
00:21:00,969 --> 00:21:01,969
Come on, dude.
496
00:21:02,137 --> 00:21:03,805
All right, all right, fine,
fine, fuck.
497
00:21:05,641 --> 00:21:07,351
We're going to the spot?
498
00:21:07,559 --> 00:21:08,810
Oh, yeah.
499
00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:10,604
We're going to the spot.
500
00:21:15,776 --> 00:21:17,861
Dude, I forgot
how sketchy this spot is, man.
501
00:21:18,028 --> 00:21:19,505
What are you talking
about, man?
502
00:21:19,529 --> 00:21:20,197
This is great.
503
00:21:20,405 --> 00:21:21,573
There's joggers everywhere.
504
00:21:21,782 --> 00:21:23,760
Look at this fucking view, dude.
This is ridiculous.
505
00:21:23,784 --> 00:21:25,470
Where are you gonna find
a view like this?
506
00:21:25,494 --> 00:21:27,496
You know, I used
to fuck Kelly here,
507
00:21:27,704 --> 00:21:29,915
like, all the time
in high school.
508
00:21:30,123 --> 00:21:32,376
No, no, no, Bridget.
That was Bridget.
509
00:21:33,627 --> 00:21:34,670
No...
510
00:21:36,004 --> 00:21:37,422
Yeah, that was Kelly.
511
00:21:37,631 --> 00:21:38,631
Right here.
512
00:21:42,302 --> 00:21:43,780
Dude, what the fuck?
You're barely lighting it.
513
00:21:43,804 --> 00:21:45,389
Come on, get big
and snap the bowl.
514
00:21:47,307 --> 00:21:48,642
There you go.
515
00:21:48,850 --> 00:21:50,435
Wow.
516
00:21:50,602 --> 00:21:51,728
That's a big boy.
517
00:21:51,937 --> 00:21:53,414
That's big boy move.
518
00:21:53,438 --> 00:21:54,523
Oh fuck, dude, fuck.
519
00:21:54,731 --> 00:21:56,709
Put that shit down.
Put it down, put it down.
520
00:21:56,733 --> 00:21:58,610
Oh, no.
Okay, swallow it.
521
00:21:58,819 --> 00:22:01,571
Dude, look at me right now.
Fucking swallow the smoke, dude.
522
00:22:01,780 --> 00:22:03,282
I can't have smoke in this car.
523
00:22:04,825 --> 00:22:06,702
Oh no.
524
00:22:06,910 --> 00:22:08,704
Are you okay?
Are you okay?
525
00:22:08,870 --> 00:22:10,890
Listen, man, you really
shouldn't have smoked in here.
526
00:22:10,914 --> 00:22:11,999
What?
527
00:22:12,207 --> 00:22:12,874
Give me the fucking bowl.
Give it to me give me.
528
00:22:13,041 --> 00:22:14,501
Shit.
529
00:22:15,377 --> 00:22:17,105
Give me the lighter, too.
Give me the lighter, hurry.
530
00:22:17,129 --> 00:22:18,505
All right.
531
00:22:18,714 --> 00:22:19,840
Oh, God, no.
532
00:22:20,048 --> 00:22:21,633
Shh.
533
00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:29,936
All right, we should be good.
We should be good.
534
00:22:30,058 --> 00:22:31,768
Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.
535
00:22:31,977 --> 00:22:32,769
All right, just let me do
all the talking.
536
00:22:32,978 --> 00:22:33,770
Just let me do
all talking.
537
00:22:33,979 --> 00:22:34,688
- Oh, shit.
- We'll be fine.
538
00:22:34,896 --> 00:22:36,231
Oh, shit.
539
00:22:36,398 --> 00:22:37,398
Oh, shit.
540
00:22:37,566 --> 00:22:38,650
He is coming, man.
541
00:22:38,859 --> 00:22:39,568
Fucking get your head
in the game, all right?
542
00:22:39,735 --> 00:22:40,819
Let me do the talking.
543
00:22:41,028 --> 00:22:42,028
Let me do the talking.
544
00:22:44,823 --> 00:22:46,742
Hey there, officer,
how's it going?
545
00:22:46,950 --> 00:22:48,618
It's illegal to park a car here.
546
00:22:48,827 --> 00:22:50,096
You guys are going
to have to move.
547
00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:51,705
Okay, I'm sorry,
I didn't know that.
548
00:22:51,913 --> 00:22:53,665
We'll get out of your hair.
549
00:22:55,709 --> 00:22:57,336
Why are his eyes so red?
550
00:22:59,504 --> 00:23:00,297
Oh...
551
00:23:00,505 --> 00:23:01,798
Uh...
552
00:23:02,007 --> 00:23:03,550
He's in a frat.
553
00:23:03,759 --> 00:23:05,761
So they, like,
farted on his pillow
554
00:23:05,969 --> 00:23:07,655
'cause he's, like, pledging,
and so he got...
555
00:23:07,679 --> 00:23:09,765
He got pinkeye
in both of his eyes.
556
00:23:11,892 --> 00:23:13,769
I smell marijuana in here.
557
00:23:13,977 --> 00:23:16,377
Will you boys mind stepping out
so I can search your vehicle?
558
00:23:16,938 --> 00:23:18,690
No, no, not at all.
559
00:23:37,459 --> 00:23:38,459
Fuck.
560
00:23:42,047 --> 00:23:43,090
You know what I should do?
561
00:23:44,925 --> 00:23:46,218
What?
562
00:23:46,426 --> 00:23:48,929
What I should do is write you
both up for misdemeanor
563
00:23:49,137 --> 00:23:50,972
for smoking cannabis
in a public area.
564
00:23:53,767 --> 00:23:54,810
But you know what?
565
00:23:55,894 --> 00:23:57,646
I was your age once, huh?
566
00:23:57,854 --> 00:23:59,064
I know how it is.
567
00:23:59,272 --> 00:24:01,775
Smoking a little weed
with your buddies, it's a blast.
568
00:24:02,943 --> 00:24:05,445
But sooner or later,
that weed you're smoking,
569
00:24:05,654 --> 00:24:07,572
it's gonna turn
into other things.
570
00:24:07,781 --> 00:24:10,826
Acid, powder, pills,
crystal, meth, crack.
571
00:24:12,953 --> 00:24:13,953
And before you know it,
572
00:24:13,995 --> 00:24:15,414
you're going down on another man
573
00:24:15,622 --> 00:24:16,622
in a mall parking lot
574
00:24:16,706 --> 00:24:18,625
just to pay
for a dime bag of smack.
575
00:24:26,967 --> 00:24:29,678
Look, all I'm saying is,
576
00:24:29,845 --> 00:24:32,305
is be careful out there, huh?
577
00:24:32,514 --> 00:24:35,100
And don't do stupid stuff
in public areas.
578
00:24:35,308 --> 00:24:36,435
Yes, sir.
579
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:40,063
Consider this your warning.
580
00:24:43,483 --> 00:24:44,776
Thank you.
581
00:24:51,741 --> 00:24:53,452
What the fuck just happened?
582
00:24:53,660 --> 00:24:56,746
Dude, I'm like 85% sure
that guy blew someone for drugs.
583
00:24:58,123 --> 00:24:59,541
Definitely.
584
00:24:59,749 --> 00:25:01,710
- What the fuck?
- It's fucked up, man.
585
00:25:05,130 --> 00:25:07,007
Shit.
586
00:25:07,215 --> 00:25:09,551
I'll definitely die
if I go and get it, huh?
587
00:25:10,510 --> 00:25:12,596
- Yeah, you'll for sure die.
- Yeah.
588
00:25:13,555 --> 00:25:14,723
Fuck, man.
589
00:25:16,099 --> 00:25:18,059
I'm not going to Kahji's wedding
without any weed.
590
00:25:18,810 --> 00:25:20,246
We'll just pick up some more.
I'll pay for it, I don't care.
591
00:25:20,270 --> 00:25:21,980
Dude, the guy I get it from
is in Seattle,
592
00:25:22,189 --> 00:25:23,732
so that can't happen.
593
00:25:24,774 --> 00:25:27,055
Dude, there has to be someone
we know who can get us weed.
594
00:25:29,154 --> 00:25:32,365
Oh, shit, dude, there is.
Ernie Wolf.
595
00:25:32,574 --> 00:25:34,734
He lives around here.
He's got a marijuana card.
596
00:25:36,286 --> 00:25:38,079
Dude, I fucking hate Ernie Wolf.
597
00:25:38,246 --> 00:25:40,624
Yeah, he's a tool,
but we kind of don't have
598
00:25:40,790 --> 00:25:42,250
any other options, do we?
599
00:25:43,627 --> 00:25:44,669
Should I call him?
600
00:25:45,545 --> 00:25:47,047
- Yeah, go ahead.
- All right.
601
00:26:03,897 --> 00:26:05,565
[I don't know how to say it.
602
00:26:05,774 --> 00:26:08,068
♪ I've been big motherfucker
since '92
603
00:26:08,276 --> 00:26:09,444
♪ Big bitches, big money
604
00:26:09,653 --> 00:26:10,779
♪ What you gonna do?
605
00:26:10,987 --> 00:26:11,987
♪ I'm into...
606
00:26:12,072 --> 00:26:13,532
Holy shit,
look at that thing, man.
607
00:26:13,740 --> 00:26:14,967
You think he'd let us drive it?
608
00:26:14,991 --> 00:26:16,535
There's no way
he'll let us drive it.
609
00:26:20,330 --> 00:26:21,581
All right.
610
00:26:21,790 --> 00:26:24,000
Hey, you know what? Let's just
buy weed from him and go.
611
00:26:24,167 --> 00:26:25,895
We don't have to be here
for too long if we do that.
612
00:26:25,919 --> 00:26:27,605
What are you talking about, man?
This was the plan.
613
00:26:27,629 --> 00:26:29,273
We were gonna come here,
smoke with him and leave.
614
00:26:29,297 --> 00:26:30,006
I don't want to be here
for too long.
615
00:26:30,215 --> 00:26:31,317
He doesn't need fucking money.
616
00:26:31,341 --> 00:26:32,610
We don't have
to buy weed from him.
617
00:26:32,634 --> 00:26:33,885
The guy's loaded.
618
00:26:34,594 --> 00:26:35,720
Come on, let's just do it.
619
00:26:35,929 --> 00:26:37,806
Maybe he's matured
since high school, you know?
620
00:26:38,014 --> 00:26:39,140
Stop judging people.
621
00:26:40,141 --> 00:26:41,861
- Who the fuck is it?
- Dude.
622
00:26:45,772 --> 00:26:47,607
Guys, it's me, man.
623
00:26:47,816 --> 00:26:48,525
Relax.
624
00:26:48,733 --> 00:26:50,485
Hey, it' not even loaded.
625
00:26:50,694 --> 00:26:52,153
Relax.
626
00:26:52,362 --> 00:26:54,489
You should've seen
your fucking face.
627
00:26:54,698 --> 00:26:55,740
What's up, bro?
628
00:26:55,907 --> 00:26:57,242
How you doing, huh?
629
00:26:57,450 --> 00:26:59,119
Good.
630
00:26:59,327 --> 00:27:00,704
Oh, come in.
631
00:27:00,870 --> 00:27:01,910
Come in, come in, come in.
632
00:27:01,955 --> 00:27:03,665
Nate, hurry up, come on.
633
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:07,168
That was fucking funny.
634
00:27:07,377 --> 00:27:08,587
Are you fucking kidding me?
635
00:27:08,795 --> 00:27:10,797
No, we're good, we're good.
He... He gave me a hug.
636
00:27:10,964 --> 00:27:11,715
It's not loaded.
637
00:27:15,385 --> 00:27:16,803
In and out.
638
00:27:17,012 --> 00:27:17,846
It's not fucking funny, dude.
639
00:27:18,013 --> 00:27:19,073
- No, no...
- Come on, guys.
640
00:27:19,097 --> 00:27:20,097
I really hurt myself.
641
00:27:20,932 --> 00:27:22,767
Ooh!
642
00:27:25,353 --> 00:27:27,689
So what've you guys been up to?
643
00:27:27,897 --> 00:27:29,983
You know, man, just the same
old shit, just chilling.
644
00:27:30,191 --> 00:27:31,276
Cool man.
645
00:27:31,484 --> 00:27:32,569
Cool.
646
00:27:32,777 --> 00:27:35,030
How's the pussy at school, Nate?
647
00:27:36,239 --> 00:27:37,657
Uh, yeah.
648
00:27:37,866 --> 00:27:39,701
Pussy is good, man, it's good.
649
00:27:39,909 --> 00:27:43,038
I bet those the sorority chicks
are so fucking hot down there.
650
00:27:43,246 --> 00:27:45,165
Is it just totally insane,
or what?
651
00:27:45,373 --> 00:27:47,208
Yeah, it's pretty insane, yeah.
652
00:27:47,417 --> 00:27:49,669
Fuck, fuck.
653
00:27:49,878 --> 00:27:51,546
You lucky motherfucker.
654
00:27:51,713 --> 00:27:53,393
I wanna live vicariously
through your dick.
655
00:27:55,967 --> 00:27:56,967
I do.
656
00:28:00,055 --> 00:28:01,535
So what are you guys
doing today, huh?
657
00:28:02,849 --> 00:28:06,686
Well, Kahji from high school
is getting fucking married,
658
00:28:06,895 --> 00:28:08,039
so we're gonna go
to his wedding.
659
00:28:08,063 --> 00:28:09,063
- What?
- Yeah.
660
00:28:09,230 --> 00:28:10,940
- No way.
- Yeah.
661
00:28:11,149 --> 00:28:13,818
Kahji, that motherfucker
is getting married?
662
00:28:14,027 --> 00:28:15,236
Jesus.
663
00:28:15,445 --> 00:28:17,445
Shit, I fucking thought
that he would die a virgin.
664
00:28:17,530 --> 00:28:20,200
Yeah me too, man.
He probably still will.
665
00:28:20,408 --> 00:28:21,910
Such a fucking loser.
666
00:28:22,118 --> 00:28:23,203
No!
667
00:28:23,411 --> 00:28:24,788
He was such a fucking bitch!
668
00:28:26,956 --> 00:28:27,956
Such a bitch.
669
00:28:28,083 --> 00:28:29,084
Right?
670
00:28:29,292 --> 00:28:30,728
Yeah, I mean,
the only reason we're going
671
00:28:30,752 --> 00:28:32,188
is just because apparently
it's gonna be his first kiss,
672
00:28:32,212 --> 00:28:35,590
and we just thought it'd be
funny to see high as fuck.
673
00:28:35,799 --> 00:28:36,966
Fucking smart.
674
00:28:37,175 --> 00:28:38,385
It's fucking genius.
675
00:28:39,260 --> 00:28:41,596
And I can help you out
with that, all right?
676
00:28:41,763 --> 00:28:42,972
Be right back.
677
00:28:49,938 --> 00:28:52,315
Dude, is this fucking cocaine?
678
00:28:53,858 --> 00:28:55,276
Look.
679
00:28:55,485 --> 00:28:56,778
Hmm.
680
00:29:02,283 --> 00:29:03,868
Yeah, that's definitely cocaine.
681
00:29:06,913 --> 00:29:09,040
Check this shit out,
boys.
682
00:29:10,083 --> 00:29:11,167
Holy fucking shit, dude.
683
00:29:12,293 --> 00:29:14,212
I call her Dank Sinatra.
684
00:29:14,379 --> 00:29:16,139
All right, well,
you got me all excited, man.
685
00:29:16,172 --> 00:29:18,133
Let's fucking do it
and smoke it, right?
686
00:29:18,341 --> 00:29:19,008
All right.
687
00:29:19,217 --> 00:29:20,885
I'll call it in right now.
688
00:29:24,347 --> 00:29:25,765
You don't have any?
689
00:29:25,974 --> 00:29:28,184
No, no, no I use a...
I use a weed delivery service.
690
00:29:28,393 --> 00:29:30,233
You can have it delivered
when you have a card.
691
00:29:30,270 --> 00:29:31,270
Shh-shh, shh-shh.
692
00:29:31,396 --> 00:29:32,772
Hi there.
693
00:29:32,981 --> 00:29:35,442
Uh, yes, I would like
to place for delivery, please.
694
00:29:36,443 --> 00:29:38,153
Ernie Wolf.
695
00:29:38,361 --> 00:29:41,239
Give me a half ounce
of Dark Knight Kush.
696
00:29:42,115 --> 00:29:44,826
Yeah, just put it
on the card on file.
697
00:29:45,034 --> 00:29:46,745
Regular member.
698
00:29:48,288 --> 00:29:50,665
Okay, 50 minutes.
699
00:29:50,874 --> 00:29:52,208
Perfect.
700
00:29:52,417 --> 00:29:53,752
Perfect.
701
00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:56,129
Okay, bye.
702
00:29:56,337 --> 00:29:58,840
Drugs are on the way, boys.
703
00:29:59,048 --> 00:30:00,258
There you go.
704
00:30:00,467 --> 00:30:02,010
You hungry?
705
00:30:02,218 --> 00:30:03,344
Want some food?
706
00:30:03,511 --> 00:30:05,054
I got pretzels and shit.
707
00:30:05,221 --> 00:30:07,182
Snacks?
I have Gushers. Huh?
708
00:30:07,390 --> 00:30:09,309
I think we're good, man.
709
00:30:12,479 --> 00:30:14,189
- Fifty minutes?
- Come on, they'll fly by.
710
00:30:14,355 --> 00:30:16,441
- Fifty minutes?
- Just relax, just relax.
711
00:30:18,818 --> 00:30:20,904
So...
712
00:30:21,112 --> 00:30:23,114
Boys...
713
00:30:26,075 --> 00:30:28,161
Before you got here...
714
00:30:29,829 --> 00:30:31,831
I took the liberty
of inviting over some company,
715
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:33,249
which...
716
00:30:33,458 --> 00:30:35,251
I think you both
will enjoy very much.
717
00:30:35,460 --> 00:30:37,212
Uh-oh, some ladies?
718
00:30:37,420 --> 00:30:40,882
- Oh, yeah.
- Yes, dude, yes. Right?
719
00:30:41,049 --> 00:30:43,129
What's the scoop on them?
Do we know them, or they...
720
00:30:43,218 --> 00:30:44,487
Did they go to high school
with us or?
721
00:30:44,511 --> 00:30:46,012
No.
722
00:30:46,221 --> 00:30:50,266
You guys ever been
on Cityscape Top Biz?
723
00:30:53,019 --> 00:30:54,187
- Uh...
- No.
724
00:30:54,395 --> 00:30:55,664
- No.
- Dude, check this shit out.
725
00:30:55,688 --> 00:30:57,357
Check this shit out.
726
00:30:58,107 --> 00:31:00,147
Look, this is
some high-end shit, all right?
727
00:31:00,193 --> 00:31:01,820
These chicks are totally shaved.
728
00:31:02,862 --> 00:31:04,364
She sat on my face last week.
729
00:31:04,572 --> 00:31:07,075
I swear to God, 4 p.m. Tuesday,
730
00:31:07,283 --> 00:31:10,036
this couch right there
where you're sitting.
731
00:31:12,914 --> 00:31:14,874
Anyway, I ordered two
about an hour ago.
732
00:31:16,125 --> 00:31:17,125
Uh...
733
00:31:18,378 --> 00:31:19,921
- Ordered?
- Yeah.
734
00:31:20,129 --> 00:31:22,382
Sandy and Heather.
735
00:31:22,590 --> 00:31:24,318
I mean, that's probably
not even their real name,
736
00:31:24,342 --> 00:31:26,177
but who gives a fuck, you know?
737
00:31:27,136 --> 00:31:28,576
Dude, you ordered
prostitutes?
738
00:31:29,556 --> 00:31:31,349
No.
739
00:31:31,558 --> 00:31:32,267
No, well...
740
00:31:32,475 --> 00:31:35,937
No, technically,
they're escorts.
741
00:31:36,104 --> 00:31:38,356
You pay them to hang out,
they don't have to fuck you.
742
00:31:40,275 --> 00:31:41,901
But they do!
743
00:31:42,110 --> 00:31:43,212
You can do
anything you want to them.
744
00:31:43,236 --> 00:31:44,445
It's fucking awesome.
745
00:31:46,739 --> 00:31:48,324
Oh, shit, what time is it?
746
00:31:48,533 --> 00:31:49,826
Oh, they're gonna be here soon.
747
00:31:50,034 --> 00:31:52,034
All right, yo, I'm gonna shave
my pubes, all right?
748
00:31:52,203 --> 00:31:53,913
There's beer in the fridge.
Help yourself.
749
00:31:54,122 --> 00:31:55,373
Help yourself, all right?
750
00:31:55,582 --> 00:31:58,001
Get ready to party,
they're gonna be here soon.
751
00:31:58,209 --> 00:31:59,210
Hmm.
752
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:01,963
Oh, shit!
753
00:32:03,256 --> 00:32:05,508
Dude, that guy is fucking crazy.
754
00:32:16,102 --> 00:32:17,395
Yo...
755
00:32:17,604 --> 00:32:18,813
Let's get the fuck out here.
756
00:32:19,022 --> 00:32:20,022
What dude, why?
757
00:32:20,106 --> 00:32:21,417
We haven't even
smoked this thing yet.
758
00:32:21,441 --> 00:32:22,668
I don't wanna be here
for the prostitutes, dude.
759
00:32:22,692 --> 00:32:23,484
This is gonna be...
This is gonna be too weird.
760
00:32:23,651 --> 00:32:24,944
You don't have to fuck them.
761
00:32:25,153 --> 00:32:26,362
It'll be fine.
He even said so.
762
00:32:26,571 --> 00:32:28,823
I don't wanna sit here
while you and Ernie do, okay?
763
00:32:29,032 --> 00:32:30,408
I'm not gonna fuck
any prostitutes.
764
00:32:30,617 --> 00:32:33,328
Alec, this guy's coked out
in the middle of the day.
765
00:32:33,536 --> 00:32:35,038
He's fucking nuts.
766
00:32:35,246 --> 00:32:36,247
So?
767
00:32:37,165 --> 00:32:38,165
Oh, shit.
768
00:32:39,125 --> 00:32:42,462
You guys stay seated, I got it.
769
00:32:42,670 --> 00:32:44,464
Oh, shit. Dude, let's go.
Let's just go.
770
00:32:44,672 --> 00:32:46,132
It's too late, man.
We are in this.
771
00:32:46,299 --> 00:32:47,610
- Let's just go.
- We are in this man.
772
00:32:47,634 --> 00:32:49,385
Hang on tight.
773
00:32:49,552 --> 00:32:51,054
All right, great.
774
00:32:51,220 --> 00:32:52,639
Cool, this is happening, okay.
775
00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:59,145
Guys, this is Sandy,
and this is Heather.
776
00:32:59,354 --> 00:33:02,273
Ladies, this is Nate and Alec.
777
00:33:02,482 --> 00:33:03,524
Hi, guys.
778
00:33:07,654 --> 00:33:09,280
Sit down.
779
00:33:09,489 --> 00:33:12,200
Oh, my god,
it is so hot outside.
780
00:33:12,408 --> 00:33:14,369
I know.
And it's not even summer yet.
781
00:33:14,535 --> 00:33:17,080
Wait, wait.
You know why that is, right?
782
00:33:17,288 --> 00:33:18,498
Global warming.
783
00:33:19,999 --> 00:33:20,999
Definitely.
784
00:33:21,125 --> 00:33:22,125
Scary shit.
785
00:33:23,419 --> 00:33:24,521
I mean, I don't know
the science of it all,
786
00:33:24,545 --> 00:33:27,215
but apparently
we are all fucked.
787
00:33:27,423 --> 00:33:28,466
Hmm.
788
00:33:29,217 --> 00:33:30,301
Yeah.
789
00:33:36,015 --> 00:33:37,350
Well, I'm gonna use
the restroom.
790
00:33:37,558 --> 00:33:39,519
Ernie, do you mind?
791
00:33:39,727 --> 00:33:43,189
Yeah, use mine.
Down at the end of the hall.
792
00:33:43,398 --> 00:33:44,565
Thanks, man.
793
00:33:44,774 --> 00:33:46,814
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
794
00:33:47,193 --> 00:33:50,321
Oh, my God, I love your vest.
795
00:33:50,488 --> 00:33:51,698
Oh, no, it's...
796
00:33:53,241 --> 00:33:55,159
It's a... It's a stupid vest.
797
00:33:56,077 --> 00:33:58,663
Oh, man, I feel
really lonely over here.
798
00:33:59,372 --> 00:34:00,999
I wanna come join you, guys.
799
00:34:27,775 --> 00:34:29,610
It's hard
800
00:34:29,819 --> 00:34:31,422
to get to know somebody
when you're sitting
801
00:34:31,446 --> 00:34:33,281
from a distance like that,
you know?
802
00:34:33,489 --> 00:34:35,116
Hmm, yeah.
803
00:34:35,324 --> 00:34:37,285
Now we can get to know
each other even...
804
00:34:38,077 --> 00:34:39,077
better.
805
00:34:39,162 --> 00:34:39,954
Yeah?
806
00:34:41,664 --> 00:34:42,664
What do you think, Nate?
807
00:34:43,583 --> 00:34:46,044
Should we get to know
each other better?
808
00:34:48,463 --> 00:34:50,131
Uh...
809
00:34:51,507 --> 00:34:52,759
I don't know.
810
00:34:58,765 --> 00:35:00,725
This fucking guy.
811
00:35:01,726 --> 00:35:04,270
You know,
I think connections are
812
00:35:04,479 --> 00:35:07,690
the most important thing
in life.
813
00:35:07,899 --> 00:35:09,067
- Hmm.
- You know?
814
00:35:09,275 --> 00:35:10,377
It's the reason we're all here.
815
00:35:10,401 --> 00:35:11,921
It's the reason
we all do what we do...
816
00:35:14,113 --> 00:35:16,032
even if it's just physical.
817
00:35:16,240 --> 00:35:17,240
Do you agree?
818
00:35:18,201 --> 00:35:20,369
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
819
00:35:25,249 --> 00:35:26,249
Okay.
820
00:35:33,758 --> 00:35:35,259
You know, Nate,
my mom just called.
821
00:35:35,468 --> 00:35:38,012
The dog got out again, so we
gotta go help her find it.
822
00:35:38,221 --> 00:35:39,263
Oh, shit. Uh...
823
00:35:39,472 --> 00:35:40,473
Yeah.
824
00:35:42,058 --> 00:35:43,494
We should definitely
go help her right now, right?
825
00:35:43,518 --> 00:35:44,518
What the fuck?
826
00:35:44,602 --> 00:35:46,604
Heather, it was so nice
to meet you.
827
00:35:46,813 --> 00:35:48,356
And it was...
828
00:35:48,564 --> 00:35:49,607
- Sassy?
- Sandy.
829
00:35:49,774 --> 00:35:51,609
Sandy, it was so nice
to meet you, too.
830
00:35:51,818 --> 00:35:54,153
Ernie, good to see you again,
buddy.
831
00:35:54,362 --> 00:35:55,506
Thanks for having us over, man.
832
00:35:55,530 --> 00:35:56,531
What, you're leaving?
833
00:35:56,739 --> 00:35:57,739
Yeah.
834
00:35:57,907 --> 00:35:59,107
Well, we gotta go find the dog
835
00:35:59,158 --> 00:36:00,803
before the kill shelter
does the fucking...
836
00:36:00,827 --> 00:36:01,867
you know, shoot the thing.
837
00:36:02,662 --> 00:36:05,164
So great to see you guys.
Thank you.
838
00:36:05,373 --> 00:36:07,813
- Dude, is that an actual boner?
- Shut the fuck up. Let's go.
839
00:36:15,716 --> 00:36:17,468
Do you still want to fuck?
840
00:36:19,846 --> 00:36:21,722
I mean, I guess.
841
00:36:25,434 --> 00:36:28,020
Holy fucking shit, dude,
that was fucking crazy man.
842
00:36:28,229 --> 00:36:29,355
Yeah.
843
00:36:29,522 --> 00:36:30,707
Oh, my God.
Thank you for saving me, dude.
844
00:36:30,731 --> 00:36:31,858
Dude, no problem.
845
00:36:32,066 --> 00:36:34,402
Dude, those girls were actually,
like, kind of hot.
846
00:36:34,610 --> 00:36:36,237
Yeah, man, they're okay.
847
00:36:37,530 --> 00:36:39,250
Dude, the one sitting next to me
was like...
848
00:36:40,324 --> 00:36:43,035
She was ready to go, dude,
like, her hand was like...
849
00:36:43,244 --> 00:36:44,596
It wasn't touching my dick,
but, dude,
850
00:36:44,620 --> 00:36:46,664
it was, like, really fucking
close to my dick.
851
00:36:48,583 --> 00:36:49,726
Dude, you're
pretty fucking giddy
852
00:36:49,750 --> 00:36:51,252
for how terrified you were
back there.
853
00:36:51,419 --> 00:36:52,461
Can we go back?
854
00:36:52,670 --> 00:36:53,462
Can you just drop me off?
855
00:36:53,671 --> 00:36:55,256
Still got a boner?
856
00:36:55,464 --> 00:36:57,258
You do.
857
00:36:57,466 --> 00:36:58,759
Let me see it.
858
00:36:58,926 --> 00:37:00,720
Dude, can you drop me...
859
00:37:00,928 --> 00:37:02,096
Dude, drop me off, man.
860
00:37:04,932 --> 00:37:07,226
All the Mexican food
in my school sucks, dude.
861
00:37:07,393 --> 00:37:08,686
I'm not defensive about anything
862
00:37:08,853 --> 00:37:11,105
about our hometown at all,
like, fuck our football teams,
863
00:37:11,314 --> 00:37:12,666
fuck our baseball teams,
I don't give a shit,
864
00:37:12,690 --> 00:37:14,442
but we have
the best Mexican food.
865
00:37:14,650 --> 00:37:15,690
- For sure.
- Hello.
866
00:37:15,818 --> 00:37:17,379
My name is Linda,
I'll be your server today.
867
00:37:17,403 --> 00:37:19,298
Can I get you guys started
with something to drink?
868
00:37:19,322 --> 00:37:20,406
Splendid.
869
00:37:20,615 --> 00:37:21,991
Uh...
870
00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:25,286
Let's go with the Casanova IPA.
Let's get a little weird, right?
871
00:37:25,494 --> 00:37:26,494
Okay.
872
00:37:26,621 --> 00:37:28,247
Can I see some ID?
873
00:37:28,456 --> 00:37:29,456
Yeah.
874
00:37:32,793 --> 00:37:33,937
All right, Linda,
here's the deal.
875
00:37:33,961 --> 00:37:35,296
I'm not actually 21,
876
00:37:35,504 --> 00:37:37,548
I'm 19, but I just
ordered the Casanova
877
00:37:37,757 --> 00:37:39,717
because I know that it would
really complement
878
00:37:39,884 --> 00:37:41,427
the meal I'm about to order.
879
00:37:41,636 --> 00:37:43,471
And if allowed such a privilege,
880
00:37:43,679 --> 00:37:44,740
I will make sure that you see
881
00:37:44,764 --> 00:37:46,599
a very generous tip
coming your way.
882
00:37:46,807 --> 00:37:48,577
If you're not 21,
you have to get something else.
883
00:37:48,601 --> 00:37:50,311
I understand that,
I understand that.
884
00:37:50,519 --> 00:37:51,519
And you know what?
885
00:37:51,604 --> 00:37:52,146
I don't wanna make you
uncomfortable
886
00:37:52,313 --> 00:37:53,313
in your place of work.
887
00:37:56,442 --> 00:37:58,653
But if we can both look
at this situation realistically,
888
00:37:58,861 --> 00:37:59,946
all right?
889
00:38:00,154 --> 00:38:00,821
College students
such as me and my friend here
890
00:38:01,030 --> 00:38:02,240
drink on average
891
00:38:02,448 --> 00:38:05,409
twice as much as an actual adult
on a weekly basis.
892
00:38:06,452 --> 00:38:08,746
I only have a few years
until I turn 21,
893
00:38:08,955 --> 00:38:10,164
and by then, I guarantee
894
00:38:10,373 --> 00:38:11,934
I'll be no more mature
than I am right now.
895
00:38:11,958 --> 00:38:13,598
I also understand
it's a liability for you
896
00:38:13,709 --> 00:38:15,503
allowing us to drink, right?
897
00:38:15,670 --> 00:38:18,923
But the fact is our tolerance
is so ridiculously high
898
00:38:19,131 --> 00:38:22,260
from the gargantuan amounts
of alcohol we consume weekly,
899
00:38:22,468 --> 00:38:24,679
I don't think it would affect
our blood alcohol content
900
00:38:24,845 --> 00:38:25,846
even a little bit.
901
00:38:26,055 --> 00:38:27,556
So it's really
a win-win here.
902
00:38:27,765 --> 00:38:29,045
It's kind of a no-brainer,
right?
903
00:38:29,183 --> 00:38:30,786
The business you work for
is going to make more money,
904
00:38:30,810 --> 00:38:32,853
I will enjoy my dining
experience that much more,
905
00:38:33,062 --> 00:38:36,315
and you personally will receive
a fatty tip coming your way.
906
00:38:36,524 --> 00:38:38,204
What do you say, Linda?
Let's get it going.
907
00:38:43,072 --> 00:38:44,282
ID, please.
908
00:38:44,490 --> 00:38:45,866
All right.
909
00:38:46,075 --> 00:38:47,827
I like where this is going.
910
00:38:50,496 --> 00:38:52,581
Okay, one IPA.
911
00:38:53,833 --> 00:38:54,917
You?
912
00:38:59,005 --> 00:39:01,257
Uh...
913
00:39:01,465 --> 00:39:03,465
I also think that a beer
would really complement...
914
00:39:03,551 --> 00:39:05,386
- Just give me your ID.
- Okay.
915
00:39:07,096 --> 00:39:08,681
Cool.
916
00:39:12,018 --> 00:39:13,644
- Your beers.
- Thank you very much.
917
00:39:13,853 --> 00:39:15,229
You ready to order?
918
00:39:15,438 --> 00:39:17,624
Yes, we're gonna get two
California burritos, please.
919
00:39:17,648 --> 00:39:19,233
Okay. That it?
920
00:39:19,442 --> 00:39:20,276
- Yes.
- Okay.
921
00:39:20,443 --> 00:39:21,843
- Thank you.
- Yep. I'll grab those.
922
00:39:22,028 --> 00:39:23,571
Yeah, sure.
923
00:39:38,961 --> 00:39:40,004
Shh.
924
00:39:40,212 --> 00:39:42,089
- Okay, okay.
- I think I'm going to get...
925
00:39:46,802 --> 00:39:48,613
Dude, please don't take
a picture of your fucking beer.
926
00:39:48,637 --> 00:39:49,388
No, I wasn't.
927
00:39:49,597 --> 00:39:50,389
Yeah, sure you weren't.
928
00:39:50,598 --> 00:39:51,598
Fuck yeah, dude.
929
00:39:51,724 --> 00:39:53,004
All right, cheers, motherfucker.
930
00:39:53,142 --> 00:39:53,809
Cheers, buddy.
931
00:39:54,018 --> 00:39:55,394
To your mom.
932
00:40:02,985 --> 00:40:04,945
Oh, you won't finish that.
933
00:40:05,154 --> 00:40:07,406
You won't do it.
You're too much of a bitch.
934
00:40:08,532 --> 00:40:09,325
Wow.
935
00:40:09,533 --> 00:40:10,743
That's weird, dude, it's gone.
936
00:40:12,161 --> 00:40:12,912
Are you okay?
937
00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:14,330
I'm great, dude.
938
00:40:14,538 --> 00:40:16,224
- You don't look okay.
- That was much-needed.
939
00:40:18,250 --> 00:40:19,543
Oh, shit. Ooh.
940
00:40:19,752 --> 00:40:22,588
See that dark haired girl?
Just, like, keeps staring at me.
941
00:40:22,797 --> 00:40:24,548
No shit.
Damn, they're all hot.
942
00:40:24,757 --> 00:40:25,508
Yeah, they are all hot.
943
00:40:25,716 --> 00:40:26,996
They're some solid beans.
944
00:40:27,134 --> 00:40:29,345
She's one of the cutest girls
I've ever seen.
945
00:40:29,553 --> 00:40:30,805
Interesting, man.
946
00:40:31,013 --> 00:40:32,807
Solid.
Good work, my friend.
947
00:40:33,015 --> 00:40:34,826
Listen, I was peeing,
I was getting some deep thoughts
948
00:40:34,850 --> 00:40:36,310
and I think
949
00:40:36,519 --> 00:40:38,437
Kahji's wedding
is a bad idea, man.
950
00:40:38,646 --> 00:40:40,123
We should just fucking bail.
We don't have any weed.
951
00:40:40,147 --> 00:40:41,467
I don't know
where we're gonna get
952
00:40:41,524 --> 00:40:42,524
any weed at this point.
953
00:40:42,608 --> 00:40:43,359
Pointless, right?
954
00:40:43,567 --> 00:40:44,944
We can just go sober.
Who cares?
955
00:40:45,152 --> 00:40:46,192
Yeah, fucking right, dude.
956
00:40:46,320 --> 00:40:47,756
I'm not going
to Kahji's wedding sober.
957
00:40:47,780 --> 00:40:49,257
That's the whole point
of going to Kahji's wedding,
958
00:40:49,281 --> 00:40:50,366
it's to go not sober.
959
00:40:50,574 --> 00:40:51,659
Plus, I need to figure out
960
00:40:51,867 --> 00:40:53,095
how the fuck I'm going
to pay my neighbor back.
961
00:40:53,119 --> 00:40:54,662
It's a real issue at hand.
962
00:40:54,870 --> 00:40:55,870
Oh, hey, Linda.
963
00:40:56,038 --> 00:40:56,831
Yeah?
964
00:40:57,039 --> 00:40:58,399
Uh, I don't know
what came over me,
965
00:40:58,541 --> 00:41:01,502
but I would like another beer.
966
00:41:01,669 --> 00:41:03,188
No, you said you're only going
to order one.
967
00:41:03,212 --> 00:41:05,464
Linda, honey, I understand
your frustration, okay?
968
00:41:05,673 --> 00:41:07,800
I really do,
I've been there before.
969
00:41:08,008 --> 00:41:09,528
But I can go ask
your manager right now
970
00:41:09,718 --> 00:41:10,928
why I'm being denied service.
971
00:41:11,137 --> 00:41:12,763
I can do that.
972
00:41:12,972 --> 00:41:14,157
If he asked you,
you're gonna have to tell him
973
00:41:14,181 --> 00:41:16,016
we're under 21, and that's why,
974
00:41:16,225 --> 00:41:17,661
which would be awkward
because that would make you
975
00:41:17,685 --> 00:41:20,521
the waitress who illegally
and knowingly served minors
976
00:41:20,729 --> 00:41:22,731
alcohol after checking
both of their IDs.
977
00:41:23,566 --> 00:41:25,359
Doesn't look too good
on your part.
978
00:41:25,568 --> 00:41:27,168
Actually, I hear
it's quite frowned upon.
979
00:41:28,237 --> 00:41:31,824
So if we could just do the right
thing for both of us, you know.
980
00:41:33,159 --> 00:41:34,910
You're a little extortionist.
981
00:41:35,119 --> 00:41:36,162
And you're punk.
982
00:41:38,831 --> 00:41:39,999
I'm a punk?
983
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:53,095
Fuck, dude.
984
00:41:54,555 --> 00:41:55,931
Fucking bullshit.
985
00:41:56,140 --> 00:41:58,517
Hey, those girls are coming.
Put the cigarette out.
986
00:41:58,726 --> 00:42:00,046
- Quickly.
- All right, all right.
987
00:42:05,608 --> 00:42:06,859
- Hi.
- Hi.
988
00:42:07,067 --> 00:42:08,068
Hi. Sorry, I'm...
I'm Amy.
989
00:42:08,277 --> 00:42:09,357
I'm Nate. Nice to meet you.
990
00:42:09,403 --> 00:42:10,922
- I'm Alec.
- Amy. Nice to meet you, guys.
991
00:42:10,946 --> 00:42:14,617
Uh, sorry, this is kind of weird
coming on to you guys like this.
992
00:42:14,825 --> 00:42:16,035
No, no, it's fine.
993
00:42:16,827 --> 00:42:17,995
Well, we were just wondering
994
00:42:18,204 --> 00:42:20,873
if you guys wouldn't mind
doing us a favor maybe.
995
00:42:21,081 --> 00:42:23,125
If you don't want to,
we totally get it, just...
996
00:42:23,334 --> 00:42:25,628
Uh, yeah, sure, what is it?
997
00:42:25,836 --> 00:42:28,547
Uh, okay, well, we're going
to this party tonight and...
998
00:42:28,756 --> 00:42:30,076
Oh, oh, I like
this favor already.
999
00:42:31,759 --> 00:42:33,052
All right.
1000
00:42:33,260 --> 00:42:34,571
Well, we're going to this party
and we were wondering
1001
00:42:34,595 --> 00:42:36,515
if you guys wouldn't mind
buying us some alcohol.
1002
00:42:37,223 --> 00:42:38,599
Uh, uh...
1003
00:42:38,807 --> 00:42:40,527
If you don't want to,
we totally understand.
1004
00:42:40,684 --> 00:42:42,603
It's just I don't...
1005
00:42:44,605 --> 00:42:46,805
- I mean, we would, but...
- Yeah, no, we totally would.
1006
00:42:46,941 --> 00:42:48,442
- Let's do it.
- Really?
1007
00:42:48,651 --> 00:42:49,944
Yeah, absolutely, absolutely.
1008
00:42:50,110 --> 00:42:51,421
What are you guys
doing over there?
1009
00:42:51,445 --> 00:42:53,205
Stop hiding, come on.
Come on, get over here.
1010
00:42:53,405 --> 00:42:54,674
- Just get over here.
- Awesome. Thank you, guys.
1011
00:42:54,698 --> 00:42:56,534
Come on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1012
00:42:56,742 --> 00:42:57,761
- There you are.
- Thank you.
1013
00:42:57,785 --> 00:42:58,785
Absolutely.
1014
00:43:00,037 --> 00:43:01,997
Get comfy. Look out,
it's a little messy in there.
1015
00:43:02,164 --> 00:43:03,165
This guy.
1016
00:43:03,374 --> 00:43:05,084
You good? All right.
1017
00:43:05,292 --> 00:43:06,085
Let's go.
1018
00:43:06,293 --> 00:43:08,128
What?
What are you doing dude?
1019
00:43:08,337 --> 00:43:09,505
We can't buy alcohol.
1020
00:43:09,713 --> 00:43:11,358
Don't give me that, dude.
Don't give me that.
1021
00:43:11,382 --> 00:43:13,717
Come on, we'll figure it out.
We'll figure it out.
1022
00:43:13,926 --> 00:43:14,677
Get in.
1023
00:43:14,885 --> 00:43:15,886
All right, all right.
1024
00:43:16,095 --> 00:43:17,596
All right, so, Amy,
I got your name.
1025
00:43:17,805 --> 00:43:18,514
What are you guys' names?
1026
00:43:18,722 --> 00:43:20,057
- I'm Tracy.
- Hannah.
1027
00:43:20,224 --> 00:43:21,559
Nice to meet you guys.
1028
00:43:21,767 --> 00:43:23,245
You're gonna have
to forgive me if I forget.
1029
00:43:23,269 --> 00:43:24,478
I'm awful with names.
1030
00:43:24,687 --> 00:43:25,830
I'm one of those guys.
1031
00:43:25,854 --> 00:43:26,981
It's okay.
1032
00:43:27,189 --> 00:43:28,566
All right, cool.
1033
00:43:35,698 --> 00:43:37,116
All right, all right, all right.
1034
00:43:37,324 --> 00:43:38,659
I don't wanna lie to you guys.
1035
00:43:38,867 --> 00:43:40,077
We're only 19.
1036
00:43:40,953 --> 00:43:43,122
And we don't have fakes.
1037
00:43:43,330 --> 00:43:45,082
We just kind of sweet-talked
the waitress
1038
00:43:45,249 --> 00:43:48,252
in the restaurant
into giving us alcohol, so...
1039
00:43:48,460 --> 00:43:50,045
Honestly,
it might be kind of tough
1040
00:43:50,212 --> 00:43:51,297
to get you guys booze.
1041
00:43:52,381 --> 00:43:54,008
Oh, uh...
1042
00:43:54,216 --> 00:43:55,259
But I do have something
1043
00:43:55,467 --> 00:43:57,803
I think might make your night
even more fun.
1044
00:43:58,637 --> 00:44:00,055
Okay, what is it?
1045
00:44:02,308 --> 00:44:04,226
So I'm thinking,
like, 60 bucks a gram,
1046
00:44:04,393 --> 00:44:05,769
five-hundred
for the whole thing,
1047
00:44:05,978 --> 00:44:07,289
which is actually
a pretty good deal.
1048
00:44:07,313 --> 00:44:08,748
It'll save you a lot of money
in the long haul.
1049
00:44:08,772 --> 00:44:09,982
Alec, dude, what the fuck?
1050
00:44:10,190 --> 00:44:11,275
Is that cocaine?
1051
00:44:11,483 --> 00:44:13,003
No, it's baking soda.
Yeah, it's cocaine.
1052
00:44:13,027 --> 00:44:14,337
Alec, what are you doing, dude?
What?
1053
00:44:14,361 --> 00:44:15,154
So what do you guys think?
1054
00:44:15,362 --> 00:44:17,656
Uh, we don't really do that.
1055
00:44:17,865 --> 00:44:18,907
- Yeah, no.
- Sorry.
1056
00:44:19,116 --> 00:44:20,760
Oh, okay. Well, we can...
We can bump it down
1057
00:44:20,784 --> 00:44:21,285
to 50 if you guys want.
1058
00:44:21,493 --> 00:44:22,703
No, you know, it's okay.
1059
00:44:22,911 --> 00:44:24,097
It was nice
meeting you guys, though.
1060
00:44:24,121 --> 00:44:25,623
- Bye.
- Thanks.
1061
00:44:25,831 --> 00:44:26,832
Oh, okay. Uh...
1062
00:44:27,041 --> 00:44:28,542
Uh, hey, uh...
1063
00:44:28,751 --> 00:44:29,251
Nice to meet you.
1064
00:44:34,381 --> 00:44:36,133
That went downhill fast.
1065
00:44:38,927 --> 00:44:41,764
Gosh, dude,
they were so fucking down.
1066
00:44:46,769 --> 00:44:48,228
Fuck it.
1067
00:44:53,067 --> 00:44:54,860
Did you steal that from Ernie?
1068
00:44:55,986 --> 00:44:58,572
Uh, no, I borrowed it from him.
1069
00:44:58,781 --> 00:45:00,908
What the fuck
is the matter with you, man?
1070
00:45:01,075 --> 00:45:02,355
Are you out
of your fucking mind?
1071
00:45:02,534 --> 00:45:04,912
Are you fucking retarded?
Did you see his fucking gun?
1072
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:07,122
He's gonna fucking kill us,
you idiot.
1073
00:45:07,331 --> 00:45:08,707
Calm down, all right?
1074
00:45:08,916 --> 00:45:10,060
He's not gonna fucking notice.
1075
00:45:10,084 --> 00:45:11,335
Don't push me like that.
1076
00:45:11,543 --> 00:45:12,795
What the fuck were you thinking
1077
00:45:13,003 --> 00:45:14,773
selling cocaine to girls
in high school like that, man?
1078
00:45:14,797 --> 00:45:15,881
I was thinking
1079
00:45:16,090 --> 00:45:17,359
that I owe my neighbor
3000 dollars by tomorrow,
1080
00:45:17,383 --> 00:45:18,735
so I'm just trying
to make some money.
1081
00:45:18,759 --> 00:45:19,903
Forgive me
for being desperate, all right?
1082
00:45:19,927 --> 00:45:20,927
Uh...
1083
00:45:22,054 --> 00:45:23,239
I'm too old
to still be putting up
1084
00:45:23,263 --> 00:45:24,366
with this shit, man, seriously.
1085
00:45:24,390 --> 00:45:26,767
This is fucking bullshit.
1086
00:45:30,062 --> 00:45:31,689
All right, dude,
I get you're upset
1087
00:45:31,897 --> 00:45:33,166
and I apologize
for what happened,
1088
00:45:33,190 --> 00:45:34,793
but can you get off
your fucking high horse
1089
00:45:34,817 --> 00:45:36,276
for a second?
It's getting annoying.
1090
00:45:37,945 --> 00:45:39,279
What are you talking about?
1091
00:45:39,488 --> 00:45:41,466
I mean, dude, just 'cause you go
to some fancy ass college
1092
00:45:41,490 --> 00:45:42,950
with all
your rich fucking friends
1093
00:45:43,158 --> 00:45:45,078
doesn't mean you're super mature
all of a sudden.
1094
00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:46,745
Well, I'm sorry to say it, Alec,
1095
00:45:46,954 --> 00:45:49,623
but my friends in college would
never do shit like this ever.
1096
00:45:49,832 --> 00:45:51,083
Your friends in college, dude?
1097
00:45:51,291 --> 00:45:52,811
Your friends in college
are a bunch of fucking pussies
1098
00:45:52,835 --> 00:45:54,145
that just swipe
daddy's credit card
1099
00:45:54,169 --> 00:45:55,355
whenever something goes wrong.
1100
00:45:55,379 --> 00:45:56,672
That fixes everything.
1101
00:45:56,880 --> 00:45:58,566
Dude, you don't even know them.
Shut the fuck up.
1102
00:45:58,590 --> 00:45:59,984
Yeah, you're right,
I don't know them,
1103
00:46:00,008 --> 00:46:02,219
because you
haven't invited me up once.
1104
00:46:02,428 --> 00:46:04,638
Is that honestly
a fucking surprise?
1105
00:46:04,847 --> 00:46:05,847
If I invited you up,
1106
00:46:06,014 --> 00:46:07,409
you would just blackout
at every party
1107
00:46:07,433 --> 00:46:08,993
and make a fucking idiot
out of yourself
1108
00:46:09,184 --> 00:46:10,286
'cause you're fucking drunk,
dude.
1109
00:46:10,310 --> 00:46:11,895
You'd be a fucking
embarrassment.
1110
00:46:20,362 --> 00:46:22,239
Wow.
1111
00:46:22,448 --> 00:46:23,866
Okay.
1112
00:46:31,498 --> 00:46:33,751
All right, I didn't mean that.
I just...
1113
00:46:36,462 --> 00:46:37,838
I don't know, man, it's...
1114
00:46:38,046 --> 00:46:39,923
I just have a lot
of adrenaline in me.
1115
00:46:41,967 --> 00:46:43,135
It's cool, then.
1116
00:46:45,304 --> 00:46:46,805
Look man, let's just...
1117
00:46:47,014 --> 00:46:48,015
Fuck it, dude,
1118
00:46:48,223 --> 00:46:49,903
let's just go get
some weed for the wedding
1119
00:46:49,975 --> 00:46:51,295
and go like we planned,
all right?
1120
00:46:52,144 --> 00:46:53,353
I promise we can get so high
1121
00:46:53,562 --> 00:46:55,856
that we will forget
we even had this conversation.
1122
00:46:56,064 --> 00:46:57,065
Okay?
1123
00:46:59,318 --> 00:47:01,945
- Okay?
- Okay, dude.
1124
00:47:02,154 --> 00:47:03,280
Fuck.
1125
00:47:04,490 --> 00:47:07,242
Uh, where are we gonna get weed
at this point?
1126
00:47:09,536 --> 00:47:11,789
I don't know, uh...
1127
00:47:11,997 --> 00:47:14,291
As of right, now I can
only think of one person, but...
1128
00:47:15,459 --> 00:47:17,294
I don't think
you're gonna like it.
1129
00:47:30,349 --> 00:47:31,975
What the fuck do you want?
1130
00:47:37,105 --> 00:47:38,982
Don't touch my cat,
he's diseased.
1131
00:47:39,191 --> 00:47:40,191
Oh, what?
1132
00:47:41,151 --> 00:47:42,945
Okay, look.
1133
00:47:43,153 --> 00:47:45,405
I'm all out
of my normal weed, but...
1134
00:47:46,323 --> 00:47:48,242
I have these edibles.
1135
00:47:48,450 --> 00:47:50,077
Thirty-five bucks a pop.
1136
00:47:51,620 --> 00:47:53,121
Tommy, 35 bucks a pop,
1137
00:47:53,330 --> 00:47:54,957
man, that seems
like kind of a rip-off.
1138
00:47:55,165 --> 00:47:56,166
Yeah?
1139
00:47:56,375 --> 00:47:58,168
How about you pay me or get out?
1140
00:48:00,879 --> 00:48:02,881
Yeah, we'll just pay.
You got... You got this?
1141
00:48:04,216 --> 00:48:06,426
Yeah, do you take Venmo?
1142
00:48:06,635 --> 00:48:07,886
What the fuck is a Venmo?
1143
00:48:08,095 --> 00:48:09,304
Venmo is an app
1144
00:48:09,471 --> 00:48:10,657
where you can send payments
to people on your phone.
1145
00:48:10,681 --> 00:48:12,057
No.
1146
00:48:12,224 --> 00:48:15,060
No, no phones, no apps.
1147
00:48:15,269 --> 00:48:16,562
I need cash.
1148
00:48:17,646 --> 00:48:19,106
I don't... I don't have any cash.
1149
00:48:19,314 --> 00:48:20,440
Do you have cash?
1150
00:48:20,649 --> 00:48:22,067
- Yeah, I got cash.
- Okay.
1151
00:48:22,276 --> 00:48:23,636
I'll just Venmo you
my half.
1152
00:48:23,735 --> 00:48:24,778
Cool.
1153
00:48:24,987 --> 00:48:26,631
Uh, you should really consider
getting Venmo.
1154
00:48:26,655 --> 00:48:27,948
It's, like, super convenient.
1155
00:48:28,156 --> 00:48:29,950
Forget about the fucking Venmo.
1156
00:48:30,158 --> 00:48:31,158
Jesus.
1157
00:48:31,952 --> 00:48:33,036
Seventy dollars.
1158
00:48:41,587 --> 00:48:44,840
Oh, and don't eat
the whole thing at once.
1159
00:48:45,048 --> 00:48:47,259
I don't care how high
you think your tolerance is,
1160
00:48:47,467 --> 00:48:48,969
eat half, see how you feel.
1161
00:48:49,177 --> 00:48:50,488
Definitely.
Thank you so much. Let's go.
1162
00:48:50,512 --> 00:48:51,513
No, no, hold on.
1163
00:48:51,722 --> 00:48:54,474
While we're here,
I think I have something
1164
00:48:54,641 --> 00:48:56,810
that you could be interested in.
1165
00:48:57,019 --> 00:48:58,103
What?
1166
00:49:02,065 --> 00:49:03,442
What the fuck is that?
1167
00:49:04,359 --> 00:49:05,569
It's cocaine.
1168
00:49:05,777 --> 00:49:07,863
What the hell are you doing
with a bag of coke?
1169
00:49:08,030 --> 00:49:09,390
I just figured I owe you
some money
1170
00:49:09,531 --> 00:49:12,451
and I can use this to pay off
some of that money.
1171
00:49:12,659 --> 00:49:14,828
I don't know
how much it's worth,
1172
00:49:15,037 --> 00:49:17,140
but I'm sure you have a scale
or something that you could...
1173
00:49:17,164 --> 00:49:18,332
What are you, nuts?
1174
00:49:18,540 --> 00:49:20,584
What do you think I am,
some kind of drug dealer?
1175
00:49:25,047 --> 00:49:26,298
Yeah.
1176
00:49:27,257 --> 00:49:29,968
No, I work
at a stationery store,
1177
00:49:30,177 --> 00:49:33,055
I sell weed to my friends
because I have a med card,
1178
00:49:33,263 --> 00:49:35,057
but I'm not a drug dealer.
1179
00:49:36,600 --> 00:49:38,310
Oh, shit.
1180
00:49:38,518 --> 00:49:39,937
I hate to break it to you, pal,
1181
00:49:40,145 --> 00:49:42,332
but you're gonna have to pay me
back the old-fashioned way.
1182
00:49:42,356 --> 00:49:44,483
Tommy, look at me,
man, come on.
1183
00:49:45,984 --> 00:49:47,584
We've been neighbors
for a long time now,
1184
00:49:47,611 --> 00:49:49,047
and I know you're upset
about the car thing,
1185
00:49:49,071 --> 00:49:50,271
I'm upset about the car thing.
1186
00:49:50,322 --> 00:49:51,531
It was a total accident.
1187
00:49:51,740 --> 00:49:53,408
But despite
all our differences, man,
1188
00:49:53,617 --> 00:49:55,637
I've always considered us
to be really good friends.
1189
00:49:55,661 --> 00:49:57,621
- I mean, we...
Shut the fuck up, Alec.
1190
00:49:57,829 --> 00:50:01,083
You're gonna pay me back
in cash tomorrow,
1191
00:50:01,291 --> 00:50:02,876
not in fucking Venmo
1192
00:50:03,043 --> 00:50:04,920
and not in fucking cocaine.
1193
00:50:05,128 --> 00:50:07,965
In cash, or I'm gonna walk over
to your mother's house
1194
00:50:08,173 --> 00:50:10,053
and I'm going to tell her
exactly what happened.
1195
00:50:10,258 --> 00:50:12,094
That's it, end of story.
You understand?
1196
00:50:14,096 --> 00:50:15,347
- Yeah.
- Good.
1197
00:50:15,555 --> 00:50:17,599
Now get the fuck out.
1198
00:50:17,808 --> 00:50:19,267
Fuck.
1199
00:50:21,687 --> 00:50:24,439
See you bright and early
tomorrow, Alec.
1200
00:50:24,648 --> 00:50:26,149
Bright and early, baby.
1201
00:50:27,109 --> 00:50:29,152
Fucking stoners.
1202
00:51:22,247 --> 00:51:23,927
It's like...
How do they make these?
1203
00:51:24,124 --> 00:51:27,127
Do they grind up, like, bud
and, like, put it in the dough?
1204
00:51:27,294 --> 00:51:29,671
Or is there, like, pre-made,
like, cookie dough, like...
1205
00:51:31,631 --> 00:51:32,966
Did you just
eat the whole thing?
1206
00:51:33,133 --> 00:51:34,259
Yeah.
1207
00:51:34,468 --> 00:51:36,362
Dude, you're an idiot.
He said to only need half.
1208
00:51:36,386 --> 00:51:37,530
Tommy is a fucking retard, dude.
1209
00:51:37,554 --> 00:51:39,114
He doesn't know
what he's talking about.
1210
00:51:39,139 --> 00:51:41,600
Just eat the fucking cookie.
Stop being a pussy.
1211
00:51:42,809 --> 00:51:43,809
Eat it.
1212
00:51:43,977 --> 00:51:45,204
I mean, I end up
in a fucking ambulance,
1213
00:51:45,228 --> 00:51:46,414
you're gonna be
taking care of me all day.
1214
00:51:46,438 --> 00:51:48,398
- I can't wait.
- All right, fine.
1215
00:51:48,607 --> 00:51:49,608
Fine.
1216
00:51:49,816 --> 00:51:51,210
This will be
really fucking fun for you.
1217
00:51:51,234 --> 00:51:52,503
Are you going to do it
or just keep talking about it?
1218
00:51:52,527 --> 00:51:54,154
I'll do it. Fuck.
1219
00:51:56,615 --> 00:51:58,575
We're so stupid, bro.
1220
00:51:58,784 --> 00:51:59,493
We're stupid people.
1221
00:52:02,829 --> 00:52:05,332
- That's great.
- This cookie tastes like shit.
1222
00:52:05,540 --> 00:52:07,167
I kind of like it.
1223
00:52:08,752 --> 00:52:09,752
All right, you good?
1224
00:52:12,506 --> 00:52:13,507
Yeah.
1225
00:52:13,715 --> 00:52:15,217
All right.
1226
00:52:18,470 --> 00:52:19,513
Let's do this shit.
1227
00:52:19,721 --> 00:52:21,181
Yeah.
1228
00:52:41,326 --> 00:52:42,702
We are here today to celebrate
1229
00:52:42,911 --> 00:52:45,372
something as special
as life itself.
1230
00:52:45,580 --> 00:52:49,000
The love between two people
can conquer any boundary
1231
00:52:49,209 --> 00:52:51,753
and overcome
every obstacle known to man,
1232
00:52:51,962 --> 00:52:53,171
including death.
1233
00:52:55,549 --> 00:52:56,299
We've come together
1234
00:52:56,508 --> 00:52:59,177
at the invitation
of Kahji and Maria
1235
00:52:59,386 --> 00:53:02,264
to celebrate their uniting
in Christian love.
1236
00:53:03,932 --> 00:53:05,308
Look at that motherfucker.
1237
00:53:05,517 --> 00:53:06,226
It's Kahji, man.
1238
00:53:06,434 --> 00:53:07,434
He looks good.
1239
00:53:07,519 --> 00:53:08,562
Look at his wife.
1240
00:53:08,770 --> 00:53:10,272
That's
what I was gonna say.
1241
00:53:10,480 --> 00:53:12,360
- She's not bad.
- She's a hottie.
1242
00:53:12,399 --> 00:53:14,234
Jesus said I come to them...
1243
00:53:14,442 --> 00:53:15,861
Dude, are you feeling it?
1244
00:53:16,736 --> 00:53:18,363
Yeah, a little, like...
1245
00:53:19,281 --> 00:53:20,282
Like I'm high, you know,
1246
00:53:20,490 --> 00:53:21,968
but, like, at a really,
like, chill level,
1247
00:53:21,992 --> 00:53:23,076
you know what I mean?
1248
00:53:23,243 --> 00:53:24,411
Yeah, dude, me too.
1249
00:53:24,619 --> 00:53:26,705
Oh, yeah.
1250
00:53:28,999 --> 00:53:30,559
...that we might have
this life.
1251
00:53:53,857 --> 00:53:55,108
Fuck.
1252
00:53:55,317 --> 00:53:57,110
What dude, what happened?
1253
00:53:58,528 --> 00:53:59,696
What happened?
1254
00:54:01,740 --> 00:54:04,242
Why the fuck did we eat
the whole thing?
1255
00:54:04,451 --> 00:54:06,411
That was fucking stupid.
1256
00:54:06,620 --> 00:54:07,980
Dude,
you need to calm down.
1257
00:54:08,038 --> 00:54:10,198
You look like you're about
to turn into a fucking Hulk.
1258
00:54:10,582 --> 00:54:12,626
Fuck.
1259
00:54:12,834 --> 00:54:14,085
Are you freaking out?
1260
00:54:14,294 --> 00:54:15,334
Your eyes are red as fuck.
1261
00:54:15,462 --> 00:54:16,755
No, they are not, dude.
1262
00:54:16,963 --> 00:54:17,963
Yes they are.
1263
00:54:18,048 --> 00:54:19,299
- Really?
- Yeah.
1264
00:54:19,507 --> 00:54:21,551
Oh, shit, dude so are yours.
1265
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:22,761
Yeah, no shit.
1266
00:54:22,969 --> 00:54:24,322
These people will only take
one look at us
1267
00:54:24,346 --> 00:54:26,598
to know we are both
high off our fucking asses, man.
1268
00:54:26,806 --> 00:54:27,806
Shh!
1269
00:54:27,974 --> 00:54:29,118
Kahji and Maria
are here publicly
1270
00:54:29,142 --> 00:54:31,144
to declare
that because of Jesus Christ...
1271
00:54:31,353 --> 00:54:32,896
Did that really just happen?
1272
00:54:33,104 --> 00:54:35,315
Dude, that old lady is fierce.
1273
00:54:43,406 --> 00:54:45,992
We should not be this fucked up
in a church, man.
1274
00:54:46,868 --> 00:54:48,596
Since when have you given a fuck
about religion, dude?
1275
00:54:48,620 --> 00:54:50,330
God gave us an apple, man,
1276
00:54:50,538 --> 00:54:51,682
and it represented temptation
1277
00:54:51,706 --> 00:54:53,416
and He said, "Don't touch it."
1278
00:54:53,625 --> 00:54:54,665
He said, "Don't touch it."
1279
00:54:54,751 --> 00:54:55,751
What apple?
1280
00:54:55,835 --> 00:54:57,170
It's like the apple of Eden,
man.
1281
00:54:57,379 --> 00:54:58,588
You're not supposed to...
1282
00:54:58,797 --> 00:54:59,797
touch the cookie.
1283
00:54:59,881 --> 00:55:00,881
Okay?
1284
00:55:01,049 --> 00:55:02,276
Well, now you are talking
about the cookie.
1285
00:55:02,300 --> 00:55:04,511
The cookie and the apple,
it's the same shit.
1286
00:55:04,719 --> 00:55:05,719
Excuse me.
1287
00:55:06,805 --> 00:55:09,599
This is the most
important day in their lives.
1288
00:55:09,808 --> 00:55:11,518
Would you please try
to keep it down?
1289
00:55:11,685 --> 00:55:13,603
Sorry, it's over.
1290
00:55:13,812 --> 00:55:15,689
It's over.
1291
00:55:15,855 --> 00:55:17,175
...and one
for each other.
1292
00:55:18,316 --> 00:55:19,316
Okay.
1293
00:55:20,860 --> 00:55:22,320
I'm okay.
1294
00:55:22,529 --> 00:55:24,197
I'm okay.
I'm not that high.
1295
00:55:24,406 --> 00:55:25,406
I'm okay.
1296
00:55:25,532 --> 00:55:26,892
I'm just gonna be okay
from now on.
1297
00:55:27,033 --> 00:55:28,743
I'm just gonna be cool.
1298
00:55:28,952 --> 00:55:30,287
Oh, shit, dude.
1299
00:55:31,746 --> 00:55:34,833
He's looking
right fucking at you, dude.
1300
00:55:35,041 --> 00:55:37,794
It's like He's piercing
your soul with His gaze
1301
00:55:38,003 --> 00:55:39,063
and He's, like, opening
His hands
1302
00:55:39,087 --> 00:55:40,630
like He's, like,
1303
00:55:40,839 --> 00:55:42,716
"I know what you did.
1304
00:55:42,924 --> 00:55:44,384
I know that you're high."
1305
00:55:44,592 --> 00:55:45,592
This is so weird.
1306
00:55:45,677 --> 00:55:47,262
- He fucking knows.
- Stop, dude, okay?
1307
00:55:47,470 --> 00:55:48,948
Don't touch me,
don't touch me, don't touch me.
1308
00:55:48,972 --> 00:55:50,181
Okay?
1309
00:55:50,390 --> 00:55:53,435
Your wife, your partner
in life and one true love...
1310
00:55:53,643 --> 00:55:56,521
But He knows.
Just know that He knows.
1311
00:55:57,689 --> 00:55:59,941
I think those boys
are both stoned.
1312
00:56:00,108 --> 00:56:01,901
Good times and the bad,
1313
00:56:02,110 --> 00:56:03,611
through sickness and in health,
1314
00:56:04,362 --> 00:56:06,323
for as long
as you both shall live?
1315
00:56:08,658 --> 00:56:09,409
I do.
1316
00:56:12,037 --> 00:56:12,579
Maria?
- Put them in, bro.
1317
00:56:12,787 --> 00:56:13,997
Put them in.
1318
00:56:14,164 --> 00:56:15,599
Can you do it for me?
I'm really bad at eye drops.
1319
00:56:15,623 --> 00:56:16,875
What are you, a fucking child?
1320
00:56:17,083 --> 00:56:18,835
Just give me this fuck
and let me do it.
1321
00:56:19,878 --> 00:56:22,213
Respect and honor him,
1322
00:56:22,422 --> 00:56:24,632
laugh with him, cry with him.
1323
00:56:24,841 --> 00:56:26,301
All right, just do it.
Just do it.
1324
00:56:26,509 --> 00:56:27,749
I'm, like, fucking... Oh, okay.
1325
00:56:27,886 --> 00:56:29,071
Listen, dude, you gotta keep
your fucking eye open.
1326
00:56:29,095 --> 00:56:29,763
They are open.
Just fucking do it.
1327
00:56:29,971 --> 00:56:30,638
All right.
1328
00:56:30,847 --> 00:56:32,599
Through sickness and in health
1329
00:56:32,807 --> 00:56:34,809
for as long
as you both shall live?
1330
00:56:35,018 --> 00:56:36,018
I do.
1331
00:56:36,186 --> 00:56:38,521
Please
present the rings.
1332
00:56:40,231 --> 00:56:41,524
Okay.
1333
00:56:41,733 --> 00:56:43,813
And now by the power vested
in me, I pronounce you...
1334
00:56:43,985 --> 00:56:45,254
Here's the kiss.
1335
00:56:45,278 --> 00:56:47,280
- ...husband and wife.
- Oh, shit, dude.
1336
00:56:47,489 --> 00:56:48,615
Oh, shit.
1337
00:56:51,201 --> 00:56:52,911
Oh, fucking finally, dude.
1338
00:56:57,624 --> 00:56:58,666
Yeah!
1339
00:56:59,459 --> 00:57:00,001
- Whoo!
- Kahji.
1340
00:57:00,168 --> 00:57:00,877
Get it.
1341
00:57:01,044 --> 00:57:02,879
Yeah!
1342
00:57:06,591 --> 00:57:07,591
Yes.
1343
00:57:07,717 --> 00:57:09,469
Congratulations.
1344
00:57:21,022 --> 00:57:22,732
Oh.
1345
00:57:23,525 --> 00:57:24,818
Look at those...
1346
00:57:25,026 --> 00:57:26,026
Dude, there he is.
1347
00:57:27,112 --> 00:57:28,863
He is such a geek,
dude, I love it.
1348
00:57:29,072 --> 00:57:30,549
Let's just go say hi
and then we'll bounce.
1349
00:57:30,573 --> 00:57:31,616
Oh, time out, dude.
1350
00:57:31,825 --> 00:57:33,660
It's a bar.
1351
00:57:33,868 --> 00:57:34,929
All right,
but you do the talking,
1352
00:57:34,953 --> 00:57:36,138
'cause I'm still,
like, tripping balls.
1353
00:57:36,162 --> 00:57:37,162
Fair enough.
1354
00:57:37,789 --> 00:57:38,789
No one's dancing.
1355
00:57:38,832 --> 00:57:40,500
You know what I'm saying?
1356
00:57:40,708 --> 00:57:42,502
You know, one of these.
1357
00:57:42,669 --> 00:57:43,670
I got moves.
1358
00:57:43,878 --> 00:57:45,398
You don't even know it,
dude, but I do.
1359
00:57:45,422 --> 00:57:46,690
- I can dance better than you.
- You've never seen me dance.
1360
00:57:46,714 --> 00:57:48,192
I've seen you dance.
You suck at dancing.
1361
00:57:48,216 --> 00:57:49,926
- Hey, what's up, man?
- Hey, guys.
1362
00:57:50,135 --> 00:57:51,195
Can we get two Jack and cokes?
1363
00:57:51,219 --> 00:57:52,219
Sure.
1364
00:57:52,971 --> 00:57:53,989
Hey, could you actually...
1365
00:57:54,013 --> 00:57:55,032
Can you make them
doubles, please?
1366
00:57:55,056 --> 00:57:56,056
Sure, coming right up.
1367
00:57:56,224 --> 00:57:57,475
Appreciate it.
1368
00:57:57,684 --> 00:57:58,435
Wow, big man.
1369
00:57:59,769 --> 00:58:00,520
If I drink more,
I'll get less stoned.
1370
00:58:00,728 --> 00:58:01,968
Yeah, I know.
I like your style.
1371
00:58:03,481 --> 00:58:05,650
Thanks, man.
How much are they?
1372
00:58:05,859 --> 00:58:08,153
Oh, no, it's an open bar.
All the drinks are free.
1373
00:58:08,945 --> 00:58:10,363
Hold on, time out.
1374
00:58:10,572 --> 00:58:11,757
So you're telling me that we can
have as many of these as we like
1375
00:58:11,781 --> 00:58:12,449
and they're free?
1376
00:58:12,657 --> 00:58:14,159
Yeah, that's correct.
1377
00:58:15,118 --> 00:58:16,578
Wow.
What's your name?
1378
00:58:16,786 --> 00:58:17,579
Andy.
- Andy, fuck yes, dude.
1379
00:58:17,745 --> 00:58:18,455
Cheers to you.
1380
00:58:18,663 --> 00:58:19,330
Cheers, man.
1381
00:58:19,539 --> 00:58:20,539
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
1382
00:58:21,666 --> 00:58:23,418
Hmm.
1383
00:58:23,585 --> 00:58:24,794
No, you're not.
1384
00:58:29,174 --> 00:58:31,509
Wow. Let's go again.
1385
00:58:34,762 --> 00:58:35,762
Whoa!
1386
00:58:35,889 --> 00:58:36,889
I feel way less stoned.
1387
00:58:37,015 --> 00:58:38,075
- Uh-huh.
- Feel way less stoned.
1388
00:58:38,099 --> 00:58:39,201
You didn't even look
stoned before.
1389
00:58:39,225 --> 00:58:40,425
Sir, does he look high to you?
1390
00:58:44,147 --> 00:58:45,148
Andy, fucking Andy.
1391
00:58:45,315 --> 00:58:46,315
Thanks, Andy.
1392
00:58:47,901 --> 00:58:48,901
- Kahji.
- Okay, cool.
1393
00:58:49,068 --> 00:58:50,069
Let's go fuck with him.
1394
00:58:50,236 --> 00:58:52,113
- There he is.
- Oh.
1395
00:58:52,322 --> 00:58:53,531
Hey there.
1396
00:58:53,740 --> 00:58:55,158
Hey there. How...
1397
00:58:55,366 --> 00:58:56,618
Oh, good to see you.
1398
00:58:56,784 --> 00:58:59,579
Remember me from high school?
I was buddies with Kahji.
1399
00:58:59,787 --> 00:59:01,027
You look great. You look great.
1400
00:59:01,164 --> 00:59:02,707
You did something new
with your hair.
1401
00:59:02,916 --> 00:59:04,836
I gotta say, I really like it.
I dig the flowers.
1402
00:59:04,959 --> 00:59:06,103
Hey, Alec, we should go...
1403
00:59:06,127 --> 00:59:07,327
Let's go say hi to Kahji, man.
1404
00:59:07,378 --> 00:59:08,898
You know what?
I'll be there in a sec, man.
1405
00:59:08,922 --> 00:59:10,691
- You go on ahead, you know.
- Let's go say hi to Kahji, dude.
1406
00:59:10,715 --> 00:59:11,734
He's the man of the hour.
1407
00:59:11,758 --> 00:59:12,860
Okay,
you're pulling me away.
1408
00:59:12,884 --> 00:59:14,677
But we're grabbing a drink
later, okay?
1409
00:59:14,886 --> 00:59:16,166
All right,
I'm holding you to it.
1410
00:59:16,304 --> 00:59:17,764
Thank you for her flower.
1411
00:59:17,972 --> 00:59:19,390
I will take care of it.
1412
00:59:19,599 --> 00:59:21,893
I'll do anything you want me to.
1413
00:59:22,101 --> 00:59:24,604
Oh, someone call
the fire department.
1414
00:59:25,647 --> 00:59:27,732
Oh, you guys made it!
1415
00:59:27,941 --> 00:59:29,943
- Why not?
- Good to see you, man.
1416
00:59:30,151 --> 00:59:31,212
Congratulations, man.
1417
00:59:31,236 --> 00:59:32,612
Thanks, dude.
1418
00:59:32,779 --> 00:59:34,989
I'm so stoked you guys are here.
1419
00:59:35,198 --> 00:59:37,075
Let me introduce you to my wife.
1420
00:59:37,283 --> 00:59:38,618
- Okay.
- Let's do it.
1421
00:59:39,911 --> 00:59:41,621
Jesus.
1422
00:59:41,829 --> 00:59:45,667
Maria, these are the guys that
I've been telling you about.
1423
00:59:45,875 --> 00:59:47,515
Maria, it's so nice to meet you.
I'm Nate.
1424
00:59:47,669 --> 00:59:48,979
You know what?
We hug in this family.
1425
00:59:49,003 --> 00:59:50,547
I'm Alec. Pleasure.
1426
00:59:50,755 --> 00:59:51,755
It's a pleasure.
1427
00:59:51,839 --> 00:59:53,007
I've heard so much about you.
1428
00:59:53,216 --> 00:59:55,677
Yeah.
1429
00:59:55,885 --> 00:59:56,553
- Whoa.
- Wow, there you go...
1430
00:59:56,761 --> 00:59:57,761
Okay.
1431
00:59:57,929 --> 00:59:59,281
Right in middle
of a conversation, huh?
1432
00:59:59,305 --> 01:00:00,824
It's been nineteen long years,
I gotta capitalize.
1433
01:00:00,848 --> 01:00:01,975
Can't blame you there.
1434
01:00:02,183 --> 01:00:03,994
- He's very serious about it.
- Yeah, no kidding.
1435
01:00:04,018 --> 01:00:05,746
Well, I'm going to interrupt
the capitalization.
1436
01:00:05,770 --> 01:00:07,164
You don't mind
if we borrow him for a second?
1437
01:00:07,188 --> 01:00:08,748
We got some catching up
to do, you know?
1438
01:00:08,815 --> 01:00:10,095
- Yeah, of course.
- Yeah?
1439
01:00:10,275 --> 01:00:11,901
- Yeah, we'll be back soon.
- Okay.
1440
01:00:12,110 --> 01:00:13,486
- Oh!
- Holly shit.
1441
01:00:13,653 --> 01:00:14,946
- Damn.
- Am I hard? I think so.
1442
01:00:16,155 --> 01:00:17,435
Let's separate you two,
you know?
1443
01:00:17,574 --> 01:00:19,009
Yeah, till more starts
to happen, you know what I mean?
1444
01:00:19,033 --> 01:00:20,433
- It's heating up in here.
- Uh-huh.
1445
01:00:20,535 --> 01:00:22,388
Look at you, man, you're
doing pretty well for yourself.
1446
01:00:22,412 --> 01:00:23,496
Married man, huh?
1447
01:00:23,663 --> 01:00:25,498
Call me daddy.
1448
01:00:25,707 --> 01:00:26,207
What?
1449
01:00:26,416 --> 01:00:27,834
Big Daddy.
1450
01:00:28,751 --> 01:00:30,003
Andy, what's up man?
1451
01:00:30,211 --> 01:00:31,713
Gentlemen.
1452
01:00:31,921 --> 01:00:33,631
Can we get three shots
of tequila, please?
1453
01:00:33,840 --> 01:00:34,840
Absolutely.
1454
01:00:34,966 --> 01:00:37,135
That's right, baby.
Hey, listen, uh...
1455
01:00:37,343 --> 01:00:39,154
So I know that you were, like,
putting on a show
1456
01:00:39,178 --> 01:00:40,513
for your family and everything,
1457
01:00:40,722 --> 01:00:41,931
but you can level with us.
1458
01:00:42,140 --> 01:00:44,421
That really... that wasn't really
your first kiss, was it?
1459
01:00:44,767 --> 01:00:46,185
Yeah.
1460
01:00:46,394 --> 01:00:47,520
What?
1461
01:00:47,729 --> 01:00:49,188
Told you man, this guy's legit.
1462
01:00:49,397 --> 01:00:51,524
Yeah, what a legend.
Let's do this.
1463
01:00:51,733 --> 01:00:53,192
Thanks, dawgs, I'm chilling.
1464
01:00:53,401 --> 01:00:54,694
- No.
- Come on, man.
1465
01:00:54,902 --> 01:00:56,338
You... It's
your fucking wedding, dude.
1466
01:00:56,362 --> 01:00:58,239
- Take a shot with us.
- It won't kill you.
1467
01:00:58,448 --> 01:00:59,448
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
1468
01:01:01,075 --> 01:01:03,202
Whoa! Ooh!
1469
01:01:04,454 --> 01:01:05,246
Yeah, that'll loosen you up,
right?
1470
01:01:05,455 --> 01:01:07,248
You're gonna need it
for tonight.
1471
01:01:07,457 --> 01:01:08,625
Are you nervous?
1472
01:01:08,833 --> 01:01:09,959
About what?
1473
01:01:11,002 --> 01:01:12,104
Can we get just three more,
Andy?
1474
01:01:12,128 --> 01:01:13,713
- Sure.
- Thank you.
1475
01:01:13,921 --> 01:01:15,798
You know, like, it's gonna be
your first time,
1476
01:01:16,007 --> 01:01:17,842
it's going to be her first time.
1477
01:01:18,009 --> 01:01:19,689
Seems like a lot
of pressure, right?
1478
01:01:19,719 --> 01:01:21,929
Well, technically
it's not her first time, so...
1479
01:01:23,139 --> 01:01:24,724
Wait, what do you mean?
1480
01:01:24,932 --> 01:01:26,934
Oh, boys, shake this, all right?
Here we go.
1481
01:01:27,101 --> 01:01:28,227
Hold on, time out.
1482
01:01:28,436 --> 01:01:30,396
What do you mean it's not
gonna be her first time?
1483
01:01:30,980 --> 01:01:33,858
Well, she had a boyfriend
before me when she was younger,
1484
01:01:34,067 --> 01:01:35,610
but, you know,
she joined the church
1485
01:01:35,818 --> 01:01:37,695
and she reclaimed
her virginity, so...
1486
01:01:37,904 --> 01:01:38,984
Yeah, so it's all good now.
1487
01:01:40,198 --> 01:01:41,741
Reclaimed her virginity?
1488
01:01:41,949 --> 01:01:43,701
Alec, Alec,
let's take these, okay?
1489
01:01:43,910 --> 01:01:44,910
Round two, here we go.
1490
01:01:45,036 --> 01:01:47,205
Here we go.
Round two, baby.
1491
01:01:47,413 --> 01:01:48,831
- Let's do it.
- To Kahji.
1492
01:01:54,212 --> 01:01:57,590
Dude, so she's had sex before
and you haven't?
1493
01:01:57,799 --> 01:01:58,919
Alec, dude, forget about it.
1494
01:01:59,092 --> 01:02:00,402
She reclaimed her virginity,
it's fine, okay?
1495
01:02:00,426 --> 01:02:01,761
No, no, no,
it's fine, it's fine.
1496
01:02:01,969 --> 01:02:02,762
I'm just saying, dude,
1497
01:02:02,970 --> 01:02:04,073
like, I don't mean
to freak you out,
1498
01:02:04,097 --> 01:02:04,806
but it's gonna be weird
when she knows
1499
01:02:05,014 --> 01:02:07,225
what she's doing and you don't.
1500
01:02:07,433 --> 01:02:08,433
You know what I'm saying?
1501
01:02:09,060 --> 01:02:12,730
Look, we really love each other,
okay?
1502
01:02:12,939 --> 01:02:14,816
So it's gonna be all right.
1503
01:02:16,776 --> 01:02:18,736
Look, my... my family
is calling me for photos.
1504
01:02:18,903 --> 01:02:20,423
- I gotta go.
- Go for it, man.
1505
01:02:20,571 --> 01:02:21,823
Go kill them out there, okay?
1506
01:02:21,989 --> 01:02:24,109
You put on a good show
out there, right, buddy?
1507
01:02:26,077 --> 01:02:27,805
What are you being a fucking
asshole to him for, man?
1508
01:02:27,829 --> 01:02:28,829
Whoa.
1509
01:02:28,955 --> 01:02:30,057
You're fucking freaking him out,
dude.
1510
01:02:30,081 --> 01:02:30,748
No, I'm not being
a fucking asshole, dude.
1511
01:02:30,957 --> 01:02:32,291
I just think it's bullshit.
1512
01:02:32,500 --> 01:02:34,380
He got fucking swindled,
dude, all right?
1513
01:02:34,419 --> 01:02:35,813
Think about when they go
to bed later.
1514
01:02:35,837 --> 01:02:36,921
He gets in her pants
1515
01:02:37,130 --> 01:02:38,399
and finds out something
he doesn't like, you know?
1516
01:02:38,423 --> 01:02:40,967
Maybe she has like an abnormally
wide vagina or...
1517
01:02:41,175 --> 01:02:42,719
- What?
- I don't know, man.
1518
01:02:42,927 --> 01:02:44,595
Crazy shit happens
like that sometimes.
1519
01:02:44,804 --> 01:02:45,930
What are you talking about?
1520
01:02:46,097 --> 01:02:48,099
I mean, it's one thing
if they're both virgins,
1521
01:02:48,307 --> 01:02:49,851
but it's an entirely other thing
1522
01:02:50,059 --> 01:02:51,102
if she isn't and he is.
1523
01:02:51,310 --> 01:02:53,688
I mean, she's never
gonna fucking respect him.
1524
01:02:53,855 --> 01:02:55,356
She's never gonna respect him.
1525
01:02:55,523 --> 01:02:57,163
She's always gonna
look down on him, dude.
1526
01:02:57,275 --> 01:02:59,402
Girls fucking hate it
when, you know,
1527
01:02:59,610 --> 01:03:01,362
a guy doesn't know
what they're doing.
1528
01:03:01,571 --> 01:03:03,072
Poor little guy.
1529
01:03:05,450 --> 01:03:07,243
For you.
1530
01:03:07,994 --> 01:03:09,036
All right.
1531
01:03:09,245 --> 01:03:09,829
But after this, we're taking
a break, okay?
1532
01:03:10,037 --> 01:03:11,037
You know it.
1533
01:03:11,164 --> 01:03:11,956
I'm just trying
to get fucking wasted.
1534
01:03:12,165 --> 01:03:12,915
Me too, dude.
Can't wait.
1535
01:03:13,082 --> 01:03:14,208
All right, cheers.
1536
01:03:16,127 --> 01:03:17,420
Oh, fuck.
1537
01:03:19,922 --> 01:03:20,923
- Oh, shit.
- Whoa.
1538
01:03:21,132 --> 01:03:22,172
- Hide.
- What, man?
1539
01:03:22,216 --> 01:03:22,884
Fucking Ernie
just walked in.
1540
01:03:23,050 --> 01:03:24,050
Are you kidding me?
1541
01:03:24,093 --> 01:03:25,373
How the fuck
did he find us, man?
1542
01:03:25,470 --> 01:03:26,864
Dude, I don't know, maybe
because you've been posting
1543
01:03:26,888 --> 01:03:29,098
fucking a bunch of shit
on your gay little apps all day.
1544
01:03:29,307 --> 01:03:30,492
You left them
a social-media trail
1545
01:03:30,516 --> 01:03:33,019
of breadcrumbs, motherfucker.
1546
01:03:34,520 --> 01:03:36,314
Ernie, dude.
What's up, man?
1547
01:03:36,522 --> 01:03:38,274
Where the fuck is it, Alec?
1548
01:03:38,483 --> 01:03:39,483
Where's what, dude?
1549
01:03:39,567 --> 01:03:40,927
Look, don't fucking
jerk me around.
1550
01:03:40,985 --> 01:03:41,778
Where the fuck is it?
1551
01:03:41,986 --> 01:03:43,186
I'm not jerking anybody, dude.
1552
01:03:43,237 --> 01:03:44,631
I don't know
what you're talking about.
1553
01:03:44,655 --> 01:03:46,341
Don't fuck with me, Alec.
1554
01:03:46,365 --> 01:03:47,885
Where's my cocaine?
I know you stole it.
1555
01:03:47,909 --> 01:03:49,160
Fucking relax, dude.
1556
01:03:49,368 --> 01:03:51,746
Shut the fuck up, Nate,
you two-faced faggot.
1557
01:03:51,954 --> 01:03:53,956
Hey, man, relax,
we're at a fucking wedding.
1558
01:03:54,165 --> 01:03:55,333
Ernie.
1559
01:03:55,541 --> 01:03:57,877
Dude, what are you doing here?
1560
01:03:58,044 --> 01:04:00,379
These fucking guys
stole something from me,
1561
01:04:00,546 --> 01:04:01,607
and I'm here to take it back.
1562
01:04:01,631 --> 01:04:03,466
No, no, we didn't steal
anything.
1563
01:04:03,674 --> 01:04:06,093
Alec, I'm gonna give you
to the count of three
1564
01:04:06,302 --> 01:04:07,887
to give me my shit back.
1565
01:04:08,054 --> 01:04:09,854
And then I'm going
to beat the shit out of you
1566
01:04:09,889 --> 01:04:11,307
in front of all these people.
1567
01:04:13,601 --> 01:04:15,019
One...
1568
01:04:17,563 --> 01:04:18,314
Two...
1569
01:04:18,523 --> 01:04:19,523
Fine.
1570
01:04:27,865 --> 01:04:30,201
Dude, what's your problem?
1571
01:04:30,409 --> 01:04:31,786
What's my problem?
1572
01:04:31,994 --> 01:04:34,080
You're defending these guys.
1573
01:04:34,288 --> 01:04:36,040
They don't even
fucking like you.
1574
01:04:37,041 --> 01:04:38,644
The only reason they wanted
to come to your wedding,
1575
01:04:38,668 --> 01:04:40,336
because they thought
it would be funny
1576
01:04:40,545 --> 01:04:41,647
to watch you
have your first kiss
1577
01:04:41,671 --> 01:04:43,297
while they were on drugs.
1578
01:04:43,506 --> 01:04:45,007
That's what they told me.
1579
01:04:46,133 --> 01:04:47,593
They don't give a shit
about you.
1580
01:04:48,886 --> 01:04:49,679
They just wanted
to make fun of you
1581
01:04:49,846 --> 01:04:51,086
while they were fucking stoned.
1582
01:04:51,138 --> 01:04:53,057
Look at them,
they're fucking high as fuck.
1583
01:04:54,058 --> 01:04:56,298
If you guys wanted cocaine,
I would have given it to you.
1584
01:04:57,186 --> 01:04:58,866
I tried to get you laid,
for Christ's sake,
1585
01:04:58,938 --> 01:05:00,231
and this is how you repay me?
1586
01:05:00,439 --> 01:05:01,439
Ernie.
1587
01:05:02,066 --> 01:05:04,944
Listen, man, I'm sorry, okay?
1588
01:05:05,152 --> 01:05:06,529
I was in a really bad place,
dude.
1589
01:05:08,406 --> 01:05:12,201
I know you guys think that I'm
some rich parentless douchebag.
1590
01:05:13,411 --> 01:05:17,123
Yeah, I might do a lot
of fucked-up shit to myself,
1591
01:05:17,290 --> 01:05:19,458
but at least I don't do
fucked up shit to other people.
1592
01:05:21,210 --> 01:05:23,546
You guys really hurt
my feelings today.
1593
01:05:25,131 --> 01:05:26,465
Congratulations, Kahji.
1594
01:05:28,009 --> 01:05:29,886
Fuck you, guys.
1595
01:05:44,066 --> 01:05:46,402
Damn, that's fucked up.
1596
01:05:47,653 --> 01:05:48,988
Dude, everything that Ernie said
1597
01:05:49,196 --> 01:05:50,674
was total bullshit, man,
I swear to God.
1598
01:05:50,698 --> 01:05:53,117
Yo, the guy's a fucking
psychopath, all right?
1599
01:05:53,326 --> 01:05:54,619
He lies all the time.
1600
01:05:54,785 --> 01:05:56,054
We've been excited to come
for this for months, honestly.
1601
01:05:56,078 --> 01:05:57,306
Absolutely, man.
We've been talking about it.
1602
01:05:57,330 --> 01:05:58,330
- Yeah.
- Look.
1603
01:05:59,415 --> 01:06:02,084
Honestly, guys,
I don't really care anymore.
1604
01:06:03,336 --> 01:06:04,795
I'm not stupid.
1605
01:06:05,004 --> 01:06:06,324
I know you guys
never really liked
1606
01:06:06,505 --> 01:06:08,424
hanging out with me
in high school.
1607
01:06:09,675 --> 01:06:11,093
You only liked
hanging out with me
1608
01:06:11,302 --> 01:06:14,513
because I did your homework,
and you got As in algebra.
1609
01:06:16,265 --> 01:06:18,601
But I don't need you guys
anymore.
1610
01:06:19,393 --> 01:06:22,104
You know, I'm married now.
1611
01:06:22,313 --> 01:06:23,314
I only invited you here
1612
01:06:23,522 --> 01:06:25,232
because I wanted
to prove to you both
1613
01:06:25,441 --> 01:06:27,109
that I was worth something.
1614
01:06:28,319 --> 01:06:30,199
And I wanted to see
how much you guys have grown
1615
01:06:30,237 --> 01:06:32,031
since the last time
I saw you, but...
1616
01:06:32,990 --> 01:06:34,259
It looks like nothing's changed,
1617
01:06:34,283 --> 01:06:36,043
you guys are still doing
the same stupid shit
1618
01:06:36,118 --> 01:06:37,118
you did in high school,
1619
01:06:37,203 --> 01:06:39,455
and that's great and all, but...
1620
01:06:39,664 --> 01:06:42,458
It's not something
I wanna be part of anymore.
1621
01:06:42,667 --> 01:06:45,067
Fuck, dude, we're really sorry
for ruining your wedding, man.
1622
01:06:46,754 --> 01:06:48,631
She's a really
beautiful girl.
1623
01:06:48,839 --> 01:06:50,275
We're really happy for you,
honestly.
1624
01:06:50,299 --> 01:06:53,052
- Yeah, she is a fox, bro.
- A fox, buddy.
1625
01:06:53,219 --> 01:06:54,845
Yeah.
1626
01:06:55,054 --> 01:06:56,681
I'm gonna fuck her really hard.
1627
01:06:59,225 --> 01:07:00,726
Wow.
1628
01:07:02,269 --> 01:07:05,231
Hey, I'd invite you both
back in, but...
1629
01:07:05,439 --> 01:07:07,316
I'm pretty sure
my entire family hates you.
1630
01:07:07,525 --> 01:07:09,151
- Oh, no, totally.
- Yeah, they...
1631
01:07:09,360 --> 01:07:10,360
Makes sense.
- Totally.
1632
01:07:10,444 --> 01:07:13,114
- Yeah.
- It's good seeing you, guys.
1633
01:07:15,199 --> 01:07:17,326
Yo, Kahji.
1634
01:07:17,493 --> 01:07:19,870
Good luck
on the other side, man.
1635
01:07:20,079 --> 01:07:21,539
Get big, baby.
1636
01:07:29,213 --> 01:07:30,589
Okay.
1637
01:07:43,728 --> 01:07:46,188
Jesus fucking Christ, dude.
1638
01:07:46,397 --> 01:07:47,982
What a mess.
1639
01:07:48,190 --> 01:07:49,567
Yeah.
1640
01:07:49,775 --> 01:07:52,486
Hey, can you drive?
Are you good?
1641
01:07:52,695 --> 01:07:54,415
No, dude,
I'm still pretty fucked up.
1642
01:07:54,488 --> 01:07:56,425
All right, here, give me
your keys and switch spots.
1643
01:07:56,449 --> 01:07:57,950
Let's just sit in here.
1644
01:07:58,159 --> 01:07:59,199
We'll listen to the radio,
1645
01:07:59,326 --> 01:08:01,078
we'll chill
and then we'll sober up.
1646
01:08:01,287 --> 01:08:02,647
We'll leave
in a little bit.
1647
01:08:04,415 --> 01:08:05,415
All right.
1648
01:08:05,499 --> 01:08:06,250
Okay.
1649
01:08:06,459 --> 01:08:07,459
Okay.
1650
01:08:16,135 --> 01:08:17,470
Hey, I don't mean
to sound like...
1651
01:08:17,678 --> 01:08:19,013
Like gay or dramatic
or anything,
1652
01:08:19,180 --> 01:08:21,057
but I'm sorry I was
a dick to you earlier, man.
1653
01:08:21,265 --> 01:08:22,545
That wasn't chill at all.
1654
01:08:22,683 --> 01:08:24,727
Dude, don't worry about it, man.
I'm over it.
1655
01:08:24,935 --> 01:08:27,271
Honestly, I miss you a lot
when I'm at school.
1656
01:08:27,480 --> 01:08:29,231
Aww.
1657
01:08:29,440 --> 01:08:32,526
No, I... Honest, I really do.
I just...
1658
01:08:32,735 --> 01:08:35,237
I think I didn't invite
you up because I was just...
1659
01:08:35,446 --> 01:08:36,673
I don't know,
I was just embarrassed
1660
01:08:36,697 --> 01:08:38,532
about the way things
were going for me there.
1661
01:08:38,741 --> 01:08:39,741
Why?
1662
01:08:41,077 --> 01:08:42,846
I don't know, The only
fraternity that gave me a bit
1663
01:08:42,870 --> 01:08:44,497
was, like, the lamest one
on campus.
1664
01:08:45,623 --> 01:08:46,725
Honestly, everyone
I hang out with
1665
01:08:46,749 --> 01:08:48,542
annoys the living shit
out of me.
1666
01:08:50,127 --> 01:08:51,295
Shit.
1667
01:08:51,504 --> 01:08:52,504
What about Machelle, man?
1668
01:08:52,630 --> 01:08:54,590
I thought that that
was going well.
1669
01:08:57,676 --> 01:08:59,678
No, it's...
1670
01:08:59,887 --> 01:09:01,222
It's not.
1671
01:09:04,350 --> 01:09:05,559
Why not?
1672
01:09:07,144 --> 01:09:10,022
I don't know, It's just
she's not really my girlfriend.
1673
01:09:10,231 --> 01:09:12,608
We just... we're just kind of
like seeing each other, but...
1674
01:09:13,609 --> 01:09:15,694
I thought by now,
like, she would be, but...
1675
01:09:16,737 --> 01:09:18,423
I don't know, we just haven't
been able to, like, cross
1676
01:09:18,447 --> 01:09:22,451
a certain, like, barrier
or whatever you wanna call it.
1677
01:09:22,660 --> 01:09:24,495
Like you guys
just don't click or...?
1678
01:09:28,332 --> 01:09:29,041
I don't know, man.
1679
01:09:29,208 --> 01:09:31,710
For some reason whenever...
1680
01:09:31,919 --> 01:09:33,045
We...
1681
01:09:33,254 --> 01:09:36,382
Whenever we're gonna have sex,
it just...
1682
01:09:36,590 --> 01:09:39,176
doesn't happen, I just...
1683
01:09:39,385 --> 01:09:41,345
I don't know, I just...
1684
01:09:41,554 --> 01:09:43,848
I get really nervous and...
1685
01:09:46,308 --> 01:09:48,328
I mean, it's... it's not...
It doesn't matter, dude,
1686
01:09:48,352 --> 01:09:49,562
it's not worth talking about.
1687
01:09:49,770 --> 01:09:50,770
It's not a big deal.
1688
01:09:53,357 --> 01:09:56,152
So, are you saying you haven't...
You haven't lost it yet?
1689
01:09:58,529 --> 01:10:00,322
I don't know
if it's her or if it's me
1690
01:10:00,531 --> 01:10:02,449
or what the fuck it is, but...
1691
01:10:03,742 --> 01:10:05,536
It's like you said, dude.
1692
01:10:05,744 --> 01:10:08,330
Girls don't like guys who don't
know what they're doing.
1693
01:10:10,916 --> 01:10:13,586
I mean, fuck, fucking Kahji
is getting laid before I am.
1694
01:10:15,629 --> 01:10:16,797
That's fucking sad.
1695
01:10:17,006 --> 01:10:19,466
No, dude, I'm a fucking idiot,
all right?
1696
01:10:19,675 --> 01:10:21,260
I don't know
why I said that earlier.
1697
01:10:22,219 --> 01:10:23,539
The reason
you can't fuck Machelle
1698
01:10:23,721 --> 01:10:26,307
is probably because you just
don't like her that much,
1699
01:10:26,515 --> 01:10:27,555
and that's fucking normal.
1700
01:10:27,641 --> 01:10:28,767
That's the way it should be.
1701
01:10:28,976 --> 01:10:30,144
Plus, I'm sorry to say it,
1702
01:10:30,352 --> 01:10:32,229
but Machelle
is a psychotic bitch.
1703
01:10:35,316 --> 01:10:37,359
You know?
1704
01:10:37,568 --> 01:10:39,528
But that little Kahji
was right, man.
1705
01:10:39,737 --> 01:10:43,199
I mean, he totally
changed my perspective.
1706
01:10:43,407 --> 01:10:44,885
In life, there's men,
and there's women
1707
01:10:44,909 --> 01:10:47,453
and we are the complete opposite
of one another.
1708
01:10:47,620 --> 01:10:48,763
But at the end of the day,
it's all about finding
1709
01:10:48,787 --> 01:10:49,787
that one that you have,
1710
01:10:49,955 --> 01:10:51,595
like, just a genuine connection
with, man.
1711
01:10:52,917 --> 01:10:55,628
I mean, and I'll admit it,
I haven't had sex in a while.
1712
01:10:55,836 --> 01:10:57,338
And I fucking mean it.
1713
01:10:57,546 --> 01:10:59,482
'Cause all the chicks I work
with that are beat as fuck
1714
01:10:59,506 --> 01:11:01,226
and they are the only ones
I have access to.
1715
01:11:02,009 --> 01:11:03,510
But it doesn't matter, dude.
1716
01:11:04,595 --> 01:11:05,595
You're fine, all right?
1717
01:11:05,763 --> 01:11:07,223
We'll find a Maria.
Just trust me.
1718
01:11:10,768 --> 01:11:12,478
Yeah, no, you're right.
1719
01:11:14,355 --> 01:11:15,957
And you know what, dude?
It's probably for the best.
1720
01:11:15,981 --> 01:11:17,941
I mean, Machelle gave me
chlamydia in high school.
1721
01:11:19,985 --> 01:11:21,487
Wait, what?
1722
01:11:21,695 --> 01:11:23,155
Yeah, dude, fucked up.
1723
01:11:23,364 --> 01:11:25,524
Wait a minute, you and Machelle
had sex in high school?
1724
01:11:25,658 --> 01:11:26,325
Yeah, man.
1725
01:11:26,533 --> 01:11:29,495
Oh, my God, dude, oh, fuck.
1726
01:11:30,829 --> 01:11:33,123
It still stings when I pee.
1727
01:11:33,332 --> 01:11:35,626
Oh, God.
1728
01:11:35,834 --> 01:11:37,461
Yeah, I don't know
what to do about it.
1729
01:11:37,670 --> 01:11:39,022
- I just kind of...
- See a doctor, dude.
1730
01:11:39,046 --> 01:11:40,732
Well, I just kind of pretend
it's gonna go away,
1731
01:11:40,756 --> 01:11:41,756
and it never does.
1732
01:11:41,840 --> 01:11:43,384
- It doesn't go away.
- It sucks, man.
1733
01:11:43,550 --> 01:11:45,344
It's scary. I'm scared.
1734
01:11:50,474 --> 01:11:53,227
Dude, do you know
what you're gonna do
1735
01:11:53,435 --> 01:11:54,645
when you grow up?
1736
01:11:54,853 --> 01:11:56,706
Like, you know, when you get out
of college and shit,
1737
01:11:56,730 --> 01:11:57,874
you know what you're
gonna do with your life?
1738
01:11:57,898 --> 01:12:00,567
I don't fucking know.
I have no idea.
1739
01:12:00,776 --> 01:12:02,736
Thank God.
1740
01:12:02,945 --> 01:12:05,197
I'm so sick of people telling me
1741
01:12:05,406 --> 01:12:06,841
they know exactly
what they're gonna do
1742
01:12:06,865 --> 01:12:08,742
and how they're going to do it.
1743
01:12:08,951 --> 01:12:11,495
You know? It scares me,
It scares the shit out of me.
1744
01:12:11,704 --> 01:12:14,665
I'm just a waiter who barely
graduated high school.
1745
01:12:14,873 --> 01:12:17,293
What can you do?
Where can you go from there?
1746
01:12:17,501 --> 01:12:19,020
Yeah, but if you want
to be successful,
1747
01:12:19,044 --> 01:12:20,629
it's good to start
at a humble place.
1748
01:12:21,839 --> 01:12:24,508
I mean, where the fuck
am I supposed to go, dude?
1749
01:12:24,717 --> 01:12:27,386
My dad grew up sleeping
in a fucking drawer
1750
01:12:27,594 --> 01:12:29,054
and I'm driving a Range Rover.
1751
01:12:30,556 --> 01:12:32,516
I mean, that's why my car
is trashed all the time,
1752
01:12:32,599 --> 01:12:34,685
it's because I hate it.
1753
01:12:34,893 --> 01:12:37,896
I fucking hate
how easy it was to get this.
1754
01:12:38,105 --> 01:12:40,607
I don't want a car this nice.
It's not good for my brain.
1755
01:12:40,816 --> 01:12:42,318
Jesus Christ.
1756
01:12:43,360 --> 01:12:45,571
Only in fucking America
do people complain
1757
01:12:45,779 --> 01:12:46,779
about being rich.
1758
01:12:46,864 --> 01:12:47,906
Well...
1759
01:12:48,115 --> 01:12:48,907
I mean, I'm not rich.
1760
01:12:49,074 --> 01:12:50,659
Dude, you're rich as fuck,
all right?
1761
01:12:50,868 --> 01:12:52,328
You're rich, just accept it.
1762
01:12:55,622 --> 01:12:57,499
All I'm saying is,
1763
01:12:57,708 --> 01:12:58,988
it's good
to earn things yourself
1764
01:12:59,043 --> 01:13:01,086
and not have everything
handed to you, you know?
1765
01:13:03,047 --> 01:13:05,758
The only way to get big
1766
01:13:05,966 --> 01:13:07,634
is to start small.
1767
01:13:09,470 --> 01:13:12,389
Dude, it doesn't matter
if you're rich or poor.
1768
01:13:12,598 --> 01:13:14,683
Everybody starts small.
1769
01:13:17,644 --> 01:13:18,854
Yeah.
1770
01:13:26,028 --> 01:13:27,130
What the fuck
just happened?
1771
01:13:27,154 --> 01:13:28,447
What is this?
1772
01:13:28,614 --> 01:13:30,240
What is this, dude?
Fix it.
1773
01:13:30,449 --> 01:13:30,949
Dude, fix it.
1774
01:13:32,659 --> 01:13:34,912
It's this shit fucking car,
dude.
1775
01:13:36,413 --> 01:13:37,891
Oh, I probably shouldn't
have played the radio
1776
01:13:37,915 --> 01:13:40,075
with the car turned off.
I think I drained the battery.
1777
01:13:40,751 --> 01:13:42,419
I gotta call
roadside service, I guess.
1778
01:13:42,628 --> 01:13:44,546
No, dude, that's not happening.
1779
01:13:44,755 --> 01:13:46,340
That's way too fucking long.
1780
01:13:46,548 --> 01:13:48,050
I'll be passed out
at that point.
1781
01:13:48,258 --> 01:13:49,927
I say we zonk out.
1782
01:13:50,135 --> 01:13:51,455
I'll set an alarm
for the morning.
1783
01:13:51,595 --> 01:13:52,915
We'll wake up
and take care of it.
1784
01:13:56,475 --> 01:13:58,644
Goddammit, all right, fine.
1785
01:13:58,852 --> 01:14:00,813
All right.
Good night, man.
1786
01:14:01,021 --> 01:14:02,731
Good night.
1787
01:14:05,067 --> 01:14:07,403
Despite all the bullshit, man,
today was
1788
01:14:07,611 --> 01:14:09,405
pretty fucking awesome.
1789
01:14:11,073 --> 01:14:12,950
Yeah, I'd say it was fun.
1790
01:14:15,994 --> 01:14:17,955
Good night.
1791
01:14:18,163 --> 01:14:19,665
Good night.
1792
01:14:52,239 --> 01:14:53,574
Alec.
1793
01:14:54,950 --> 01:14:57,578
Alec, wake up.
1794
01:14:57,786 --> 01:14:59,580
Turn the alarm off.
1795
01:15:07,588 --> 01:15:08,964
Holy shit.
1796
01:15:10,799 --> 01:15:12,634
What the fuck
are these people doing, man?
1797
01:15:13,510 --> 01:15:15,554
It's Sunday, dude.
They're going to church.
1798
01:15:17,514 --> 01:15:19,057
That makes sense.
1799
01:15:36,700 --> 01:15:37,868
All righty.
1800
01:15:44,208 --> 01:15:45,250
What?
1801
01:15:46,960 --> 01:15:49,796
Dude, how the fuck am I gonna
get three grand by today?
1802
01:15:53,800 --> 01:15:55,862
I don't know, is there anyone
at work that can help you out?
1803
01:15:55,886 --> 01:15:56,886
No.
1804
01:16:00,015 --> 01:16:03,185
No, man, my dad's gonna have
to pay for it.
1805
01:16:04,061 --> 01:16:05,938
He's gonna fucking kill me.
1806
01:16:06,980 --> 01:16:08,690
Shit.
1807
01:16:10,025 --> 01:16:11,693
I'm sorry, man.
1808
01:16:11,902 --> 01:16:13,195
It's okay.
1809
01:16:15,781 --> 01:16:17,866
I guess there's a lot of things
I need to change.
1810
01:16:21,245 --> 01:16:22,788
Shit, if this isn't
a wake-up call,
1811
01:16:22,955 --> 01:16:24,540
I don't wanna to see
what will be.
1812
01:16:29,169 --> 01:16:30,462
Dude, if there's anyone I know
1813
01:16:30,671 --> 01:16:32,548
who can get out
of this situation, it's you.
1814
01:16:32,756 --> 01:16:35,050
You'll figure something out.
Don't worry about it, man.
1815
01:16:36,885 --> 01:16:38,485
You know what?
You're right, I will, man.
1816
01:16:38,637 --> 01:16:39,989
I will figure something out.
Thank you.
1817
01:16:40,013 --> 01:16:41,682
Yeah, sure thing, man, yeah.
1818
01:16:41,890 --> 01:16:43,409
- Good hanging with you today.
- Yeah, you too, brother.
1819
01:16:43,433 --> 01:16:45,602
Yeah.
1820
01:16:45,811 --> 01:16:47,104
- Later.
- See you.
1821
01:16:48,730 --> 01:16:50,857
And hey, you should come up
to school some time
1822
01:16:51,066 --> 01:16:52,252
and visit me
and meet my friends.
1823
01:16:52,276 --> 01:16:53,777
I think you'd like them.
1824
01:16:53,986 --> 01:16:54,986
Yes, dude.
1825
01:16:55,153 --> 01:16:56,633
That sounds awesome.
Just let me know.
1826
01:16:56,697 --> 01:16:58,740
- I will.
- Cool.
1827
01:16:59,783 --> 01:17:01,577
Uh...
1828
01:17:01,785 --> 01:17:03,954
Hey, man, good luck
with the whole Machelle thing.
1829
01:17:04,162 --> 01:17:06,164
Yeah, thanks.
1830
01:17:06,331 --> 01:17:07,708
Cool.
1831
01:18:30,290 --> 01:18:31,290
Hey.
1832
01:18:34,002 --> 01:18:35,087
Hey.
1833
01:18:36,922 --> 01:18:38,256
Do you remember me?
1834
01:18:38,465 --> 01:18:41,051
Yeah, I do.
It's uh... it's...
1835
01:18:41,259 --> 01:18:42,403
- Amy.
- Amy. It's Amy, right.
1836
01:18:42,427 --> 01:18:45,013
Oh, my gosh.
It's so nice to see you.
1837
01:18:45,222 --> 01:18:46,240
Yeah, it's good to see you, too.
1838
01:18:46,264 --> 01:18:47,264
I didn't think I'd...
1839
01:18:48,600 --> 01:18:49,869
- I know. This is weird, right?
- Wow, this is really weird.
1840
01:18:49,893 --> 01:18:51,103
- Yeah.
- Uh...
1841
01:18:53,814 --> 01:18:55,649
Oh, my God.
I'm so sorry about yesterday.
1842
01:18:55,857 --> 01:18:56,858
I'm so, so sorry.
1843
01:18:57,025 --> 01:18:57,818
I'm not, like, a drug dealer
or anything.
1844
01:18:58,026 --> 01:18:59,319
It's fine.
1845
01:18:59,528 --> 01:19:00,630
My friend, he's just like...
My friend from high school,
1846
01:19:00,654 --> 01:19:01,881
he's just, like,
out-of-his-mind crazy.
1847
01:19:01,905 --> 01:19:03,323
I, uh...
1848
01:19:03,532 --> 01:19:04,884
I'm sorry, that must have scared
the shit out of you.
1849
01:19:04,908 --> 01:19:05,908
It's okay.
1850
01:19:06,034 --> 01:19:07,953
Seriously, no.
I have crazy friends too.
1851
01:19:08,120 --> 01:19:09,371
- You do?
- Yeah.
1852
01:19:09,579 --> 01:19:10,706
So, okay, get this,
1853
01:19:10,914 --> 01:19:14,084
yesterday my friend
sold ecstasy to my brother.
1854
01:19:14,292 --> 01:19:15,770
- Was he a little brother or?
- Yeah, yeah, little brother.
1855
01:19:15,794 --> 01:19:16,378
Little brother, okay.
1856
01:19:16,586 --> 01:19:18,839
Yeah, he's 15, so, yeah.
1857
01:19:19,005 --> 01:19:19,798
- Okay.
- Yeah, little.
1858
01:19:20,006 --> 01:19:22,259
It's young to be doing ecstasy.
1859
01:19:23,969 --> 01:19:25,321
- Fuck, you must've been...
- Yeah, I know.
1860
01:19:25,345 --> 01:19:26,406
You must've been furious.
That's...
1861
01:19:26,430 --> 01:19:28,140
Oh, I was pissed.
1862
01:19:28,348 --> 01:19:29,933
So pissed but...
1863
01:19:31,017 --> 01:19:32,217
I think I was more just pissed
1864
01:19:32,352 --> 01:19:34,112
at being friends with her
in the first place.
1865
01:19:34,187 --> 01:19:35,731
You know? But...
1866
01:19:36,481 --> 01:19:37,983
What are you gonna do?
1867
01:19:38,150 --> 01:19:39,443
We all need crazy friends,
right?
1868
01:19:39,651 --> 01:19:41,820
I mean, they're the ones
we make all our memories with.
1869
01:19:42,028 --> 01:19:43,864
That's why we keep them around.
1870
01:19:44,030 --> 01:19:46,158
Yeah, that's true. There's...
1871
01:19:46,366 --> 01:19:50,370
There's no way I'll ever forget
these last two days, so...
1872
01:19:50,579 --> 01:19:51,747
I agree with you there.
1873
01:19:54,082 --> 01:19:55,876
That's for sure.
1874
01:20:02,424 --> 01:20:03,842
Uh...
1875
01:20:07,053 --> 01:20:08,053
It's...
1876
01:20:08,972 --> 01:20:10,766
It is really nice
to see you again.
1877
01:20:12,434 --> 01:20:14,311
It's really nice
seeing you, too.
1878
01:20:30,076 --> 01:20:31,495
Oh, wait.
1879
01:20:33,163 --> 01:20:34,956
Holy shit.
Wait, we're getting married?
1880
01:20:35,165 --> 01:20:37,167
Uh...
1881
01:20:37,375 --> 01:20:38,668
What?
1882
01:20:38,877 --> 01:20:40,855
No, I mean, like you seem
really nice and pretty and all,
1883
01:20:40,879 --> 01:20:42,923
but, uh,
1884
01:20:43,131 --> 01:20:44,650
I don't know, that's...
That's kind of crazy.
1885
01:20:44,674 --> 01:20:46,218
What are you talking about?
1886
01:20:46,426 --> 01:20:49,304
Fuck, it said in two years.
I don't...
1887
01:20:49,513 --> 01:20:50,972
I don't see myself
getting married
1888
01:20:51,181 --> 01:20:52,891
until I'm at least, like...
1889
01:20:53,099 --> 01:20:54,226
I don't know, like, 30.
1890
01:20:54,434 --> 01:20:56,074
Do you think you're
hot shit or something?
1891
01:20:56,144 --> 01:20:57,144
No, really, do you think
1892
01:20:57,187 --> 01:20:58,467
that I'm not
good enough for you?
1893
01:20:58,605 --> 01:21:00,023
Oh, no.
1894
01:21:00,232 --> 01:21:02,376
No, no, I wasn't saying that.
I was just saying, like, it's...
1895
01:21:02,400 --> 01:21:03,920
Well, I mean, you know,
it's a really big commitment...
1896
01:21:03,944 --> 01:21:05,070
It's a commitment?
1897
01:21:05,278 --> 01:21:06,321
You know, have fun
1898
01:21:06,530 --> 01:21:07,924
committing to jerking
yourself off every night.
1899
01:21:07,948 --> 01:21:09,157
You're a fucking virgin.
1900
01:21:09,866 --> 01:21:10,909
Wait, no, I'm not.
1901
01:21:11,117 --> 01:21:12,202
Yeah, yeah, you are.
1902
01:21:12,410 --> 01:21:14,371
I can smell it on you,
you fucking weirdo.
1903
01:21:14,579 --> 01:21:15,640
Oh, my God, I was just saying...
1904
01:21:15,664 --> 01:21:17,207
"Oh my God, I was just... I..."
1905
01:21:17,415 --> 01:21:19,042
You know what? Save it, okay.
1906
01:21:19,251 --> 01:21:21,211
I'm leaving.
Go fuck yourself.
1907
01:21:22,879 --> 01:21:24,256
Oh.
1908
01:21:25,882 --> 01:21:27,050
Oh...
1909
01:21:27,259 --> 01:21:29,261
We could get married, I...
1910
01:21:29,469 --> 01:21:31,304
Shit.
1911
01:21:31,513 --> 01:21:33,431
Shit. Okay.
1912
01:21:33,640 --> 01:21:34,933
Okay.
1913
01:21:35,141 --> 01:21:36,852
Fuck.
1914
01:21:37,060 --> 01:21:38,353
Fuck!
1915
01:21:52,242 --> 01:21:53,242
Fuck it.
1916
01:22:16,266 --> 01:22:18,018
♪ The days go on
1917
01:22:18,226 --> 01:22:19,811
♪? The days go on
1918
01:22:19,978 --> 01:22:21,354
♪ I traveled in my mind
1919
01:22:21,563 --> 01:22:23,815
♪ Through illusions I find
1920
01:22:24,024 --> 01:22:25,066
♪ Mystic Rabbit knows
1921
01:22:25,275 --> 01:22:27,360
♪ Where the carrot grows
1922
01:22:27,527 --> 01:22:28,528
♪ Never trust a man
1923
01:22:28,737 --> 01:22:30,780
♪ Who says he always knows
1924
01:22:30,989 --> 01:22:33,909
♪ So goodbye
1925
01:22:34,117 --> 01:22:37,829
♪ Little ones
1926
01:22:38,038 --> 01:22:41,124
♪ So goodbye
1927
01:22:41,333 --> 01:22:45,420
♪ Little ones
1928
01:22:45,629 --> 01:22:47,130
♪ Forever in the sun
1929
01:22:47,339 --> 01:22:49,174
♪ Is a time to be spent
1930
01:22:49,382 --> 01:22:50,800
♪ Forever in the sun
1931
01:22:51,009 --> 01:22:53,053
♪ You'll know
everywhere I went
1932
01:22:53,261 --> 01:22:54,471
♪ Life is like a train
1933
01:22:54,679 --> 01:22:56,848
♪ And I'm living on the tracks
1934
01:22:57,057 --> 01:22:58,141
♪ Some people go strange
1935
01:22:58,350 --> 01:23:00,143
♪ They don't ever come back
1936
01:23:00,352 --> 01:23:03,229
♪ So goodbye
1937
01:23:03,396 --> 01:23:07,233
♪ Little ones
1938
01:23:07,442 --> 01:23:10,612
♪ So goodbye
1939
01:23:10,820 --> 01:23:12,614
♪ Little ones
1940
01:23:15,158 --> 01:23:21,498
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
1941
01:23:22,666 --> 01:23:29,089
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
1942
01:23:30,215 --> 01:23:34,302
♪ Oh, oh
1943
01:23:37,514 --> 01:23:41,726
♪ Oh, oh, oh
1944
01:25:02,849 --> 01:25:04,601
♪ The days go on
1945
01:25:04,809 --> 01:25:06,478
♪ The days go on
1946
01:25:06,686 --> 01:25:08,146
♪ I traveled in my mind
1947
01:25:08,354 --> 01:25:10,398
♪ Through illusions I find
1948
01:25:10,607 --> 01:25:11,649
♪ Mystic Rabbit knows
1949
01:25:11,816 --> 01:25:14,110
♪ Where the carrot grows
1950
01:25:14,319 --> 01:25:15,361
♪ Never trust a man
1951
01:25:15,570 --> 01:25:17,280
♪ Who says he always knows
1952
01:25:17,489 --> 01:25:20,492
♪ So goodbye
1953
01:25:20,700 --> 01:25:24,454
♪ Little ones
1954
01:25:24,662 --> 01:25:27,624
♪ So goodbye
1955
01:25:27,791 --> 01:25:30,210
♪ Little ones
1956
01:25:32,587 --> 01:25:36,424
♪ Oh, oh
1957
01:25:36,633 --> 01:25:40,261
♪ Oh
1957
01:25:41,305 --> 01:25:47,931
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