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1
00:00:02,023 --> 00:00:04,225
Jim: You always said you'd
never leave Kansas City
2
00:00:04,259 --> 00:00:06,062
unless it was for something really big.
3
00:00:06,094 --> 00:00:08,363
Well, I just got an offer
from New York, darlin'.
4
00:00:08,396 --> 00:00:09,244
The Yankees?
5
00:00:09,252 --> 00:00:09,998
The Mets.
6
00:00:10,086 --> 00:00:10,943
Ohh.
7
00:00:11,046 --> 00:00:13,147
Yeah, I know, but I'd still
be the voice of New York.
8
00:00:13,181 --> 00:00:15,150
And you and I would finally
be the king and queen
9
00:00:15,182 --> 00:00:16,951
of a great city... of the city.
10
00:00:16,984 --> 00:00:18,953
Well, Kansas City's a great city.
11
00:00:18,987 --> 00:00:20,322
Yeah, for ribs, and that's it.
12
00:00:20,354 --> 00:00:21,557
And Memphis is better.
13
00:00:21,589 --> 00:00:23,892
[Gasps] Jim, we have neighbors.
14
00:00:23,926 --> 00:00:25,661
Watch your mouth.
15
00:00:25,694 --> 00:00:28,030
We've built a life for ourselves here.
16
00:00:28,063 --> 00:00:30,299
It's also small-time, is what it is.
17
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:32,100
I'm... I'm a peacock, darlin'.
18
00:00:32,133 --> 00:00:35,103
I need to strut my stuff
out there on the world stage.
19
00:00:35,136 --> 00:00:38,173
[Sighs] I love you, Jim.
20
00:00:38,206 --> 00:00:40,441
And I want you to be happy.
21
00:00:42,243 --> 00:00:43,378
So...
22
00:00:45,174 --> 00:00:46,447
let's do it.
23
00:00:46,481 --> 00:00:48,117
- Really?
- Yeah.
24
00:00:48,149 --> 00:00:49,417
- New York?
- Yeah.
25
00:00:49,450 --> 00:00:51,319
Honey, I love you. I love you.
26
00:00:51,353 --> 00:00:52,655
- [Laughs]
- Mwah.
27
00:00:52,688 --> 00:00:54,956
You know, the first
time you said that to me
28
00:00:54,990 --> 00:00:56,556
was 20 years ago today.
29
00:00:57,222 --> 00:00:58,371
Is today the 9th?
30
00:00:58,437 --> 00:00:59,111
Mm-hmm.
31
00:00:59,135 --> 00:01:00,462
Oh, how could I have forgotten that?
32
00:01:00,494 --> 00:01:02,096
- I'm sorry.
- Aww.
33
00:01:02,130 --> 00:01:03,399
You can make it up to me later.
34
00:01:03,431 --> 00:01:04,466
Oh-kay!
35
00:01:04,499 --> 00:01:05,500
- [Laughs]
- All right.
36
00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:08,002
I might need a little
nap first, but yeah, yeah.
37
00:01:08,035 --> 00:01:09,203
- [Slap!]
- Oh!
38
00:01:09,237 --> 00:01:11,473
- Love you, honey.
- I love you, too!
39
00:01:11,506 --> 00:01:12,474
[Door opens]
40
00:01:12,506 --> 00:01:13,975
Supper will be on the stove!
41
00:01:14,009 --> 00:01:15,077
Thank you.
42
00:01:15,110 --> 00:01:16,444
[Door closes]
43
00:01:21,649 --> 00:01:24,152
[Car engine starts]
44
00:01:26,187 --> 00:01:27,956
[Dialing]
45
00:01:27,990 --> 00:01:29,691
[Car drives off]
46
00:01:29,725 --> 00:01:31,092
[Line ringing]
47
00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:32,327
Bob: [Filtered voice] Bob Greenwald.
48
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:35,196
You shut your mouth, you little bitch.
49
00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:36,564
Yes, Mistress L.
50
00:01:36,598 --> 00:01:38,467
Now, I want you to grab some nitrous,
51
00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:42,504
and you get your tiny dick to my house.
52
00:01:42,536 --> 00:01:44,973
[Squeaking]
53
00:02:01,690 --> 00:02:04,393
[Man speaking indistinctly in distance]
54
00:02:04,425 --> 00:02:07,729
How is it still on fire after a week?!
55
00:02:07,762 --> 00:02:10,099
It's like we're in hell!
56
00:02:10,131 --> 00:02:12,266
I feel that hell would
be more impressive.
57
00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:14,369
These FEMA assholes won't let us play
58
00:02:14,403 --> 00:02:17,139
just 'cause the ground
temperature is 157.
59
00:02:17,163 --> 00:02:18,321
They wear cleats, you know!
60
00:02:18,385 --> 00:02:19,141
[ Cellphone rings ]
61
00:02:19,173 --> 00:02:20,676
I'm gonna take this.
62
00:02:20,708 --> 00:02:23,312
[Chuckling] Okay.
63
00:02:23,344 --> 00:02:24,512
Joe Buck.
64
00:02:24,546 --> 00:02:27,182
Are we "randomly call each other
during the day" friends now?
65
00:02:27,214 --> 00:02:29,051
Mm, no, not quite.
66
00:02:29,083 --> 00:02:30,685
I've got you listed as
67
00:02:30,718 --> 00:02:33,688
Golden-Voiced Homeless
Man number 2 in my phone.
68
00:02:33,722 --> 00:02:36,026
Look, the way I see it,
69
00:02:36,090 --> 00:02:39,027
Musburger's turd means
I owe you a favor now.
70
00:02:39,060 --> 00:02:41,730
I've been making some calls, and I may
71
00:02:41,762 --> 00:02:44,065
have gotten you a job in baseball.
72
00:02:44,099 --> 00:02:46,468
Oh, Joe, I would kill up to five people
73
00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:48,604
for you if you could get
me the hell outta here.
74
00:02:48,636 --> 00:02:52,040
Atlanta's thinking about
making a change at play-by-play,
75
00:02:52,074 --> 00:02:54,076
but you make them nervous.
76
00:02:54,109 --> 00:02:57,345
So, here's the deal.
You got to go down...
77
00:02:57,379 --> 00:02:58,747
[Sniffs]
78
00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:01,349
You got to go down to their
AAA club in New Orleans
79
00:03:01,383 --> 00:03:02,651
and work for a while.
80
00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:03,684
Oh, my God, that's incredible.
81
00:03:03,718 --> 00:03:04,720
And tell 'em not to be nervous.
82
00:03:04,753 --> 00:03:06,455
Tell 'em I don't drink...
83
00:03:06,487 --> 00:03:09,039
hard liquor between the
hours of 6:00 and 11:00 a.m.
84
00:03:09,158 --> 00:03:10,079
What about drugs?
85
00:03:10,111 --> 00:03:11,426
Oh, no, the cocaine, that's just...
86
00:03:11,460 --> 00:03:13,796
it's like little confidence
cups of coffee during the day,
87
00:03:13,828 --> 00:03:15,164
little bumps. That's all.
88
00:03:15,196 --> 00:03:16,432
Buddy, listen.
89
00:03:16,464 --> 00:03:18,300
If you can make it no booze
90
00:03:18,332 --> 00:03:20,635
between 6:00 a.m. and 5:00 p.m.,
91
00:03:20,669 --> 00:03:22,371
and coke only on the weekends,
92
00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:24,305
I think I can hook this up for you.
93
00:03:24,338 --> 00:03:25,841
All right, there, mommy.
94
00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:28,909
Okay, but either way, this
calls for a celebration.
95
00:03:29,004 --> 00:03:31,242
The only catch is you
have to start immediately.
96
00:03:31,274 --> 00:03:32,113
[Sniffing] Ahh.
97
00:03:32,147 --> 00:03:33,585
What was that?
98
00:03:33,641 --> 00:03:34,583
What was that?
99
00:03:34,616 --> 00:03:37,109
- Who do you think you are?!
- Oh, oh, I gotta go.
100
00:03:37,180 --> 00:03:38,069
Thank you, Joe Buck.
101
00:03:38,299 --> 00:03:40,122
[Scoffs] Let me know.
102
00:03:46,260 --> 00:03:48,262
This is crap.
103
00:03:48,296 --> 00:03:49,598
Who do you think you are?!
104
00:03:49,630 --> 00:03:51,599
You think you're such a
big shot, Mr. FEMA guy!
105
00:03:51,633 --> 00:03:53,368
- All right. Okay.
- You know who you are?
106
00:03:53,401 --> 00:03:55,437
You're just the orderly that's summoned
107
00:03:55,469 --> 00:03:56,737
when America shits itself!
108
00:03:56,771 --> 00:03:59,107
All right, easy there.
Hey, Jake LaMotta, easy.
109
00:03:59,141 --> 00:04:00,509
Hey, let him go.
110
00:04:00,541 --> 00:04:04,379
Come on, Jules. My
goodness, it's not his fault.
111
00:04:05,814 --> 00:04:07,182
[Panting] I know.
112
00:04:07,214 --> 00:04:09,117
It's Pennsylvania Shale's.
113
00:04:14,738 --> 00:04:17,341
What the fuck do you think you're doing?
114
00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:18,560
I'm playing solitaire.
115
00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:21,017
Yeah, I got addicted to the
solitaire on my office computer,
116
00:04:21,050 --> 00:04:22,085
so I come in here...
117
00:04:22,118 --> 00:04:23,752
You set fire to my field?!
118
00:04:23,786 --> 00:04:25,488
I heard about the natural phenomenon
119
00:04:25,521 --> 00:04:27,424
occurring at the
stadium. That is a shame.
120
00:04:27,457 --> 00:04:28,791
I just want to assure you that we...
121
00:04:28,824 --> 00:04:30,426
Just be real for one God damn second
122
00:04:30,459 --> 00:04:31,928
and admit that you set fire to my field
123
00:04:31,961 --> 00:04:33,863
because you want my team to go under
124
00:04:33,896 --> 00:04:35,165
for some bullshit reason!
125
00:04:35,197 --> 00:04:38,668
I would never, ever
do anything like that.
126
00:04:38,700 --> 00:04:41,537
And even if I did, I
would never admit to it
127
00:04:41,570 --> 00:04:43,506
'cause I'm assuming you're recording me.
128
00:04:44,673 --> 00:04:45,674
What?
129
00:04:45,707 --> 00:04:48,210
Come on. Slide it over.
130
00:04:48,243 --> 00:04:49,945
Okay.
131
00:04:51,781 --> 00:04:53,216
- Fine.
- [Cellphone slides]
132
00:04:53,248 --> 00:04:55,217
[Cellphone beeps]
133
00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,085
Spy pen, please.
134
00:04:57,118 --> 00:05:00,423
The one just pokin' on out of the bag.
135
00:05:02,724 --> 00:05:03,792
That's good.
136
00:05:03,825 --> 00:05:06,862
All right. [Clears throat]
137
00:05:06,896 --> 00:05:08,163
Wow, are you kidding me?
138
00:05:08,197 --> 00:05:10,166
You have a record
player in your boardroom?
139
00:05:10,199 --> 00:05:11,968
- Shh, shh, shh.
- [Spiritual chanting]
140
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,536
It just sounds warmer.
141
00:05:13,569 --> 00:05:14,938
My God, you're so sick.
142
00:05:14,971 --> 00:05:17,106
Look, this is nothing personal, Jules.
143
00:05:17,139 --> 00:05:19,675
I genuinely like you.
144
00:05:19,709 --> 00:05:22,478
You are very, very good-looking,
145
00:05:22,512 --> 00:05:24,714
but the forces you're
facing are bigger than me.
146
00:05:24,747 --> 00:05:26,716
They're bigger than Pennsylvania Shale.
147
00:05:26,748 --> 00:05:30,185
Someday, when everything
switches over to solar panels
148
00:05:30,219 --> 00:05:33,856
in a hundred years, or,
you know, God willing, 200,
149
00:05:33,889 --> 00:05:36,759
a guy like me is gonna be having
the exact same conversation
150
00:05:36,791 --> 00:05:39,262
with someone who owns the
best place to catch the sun.
151
00:05:39,295 --> 00:05:41,598
Or maybe it'd even
sound different, like...
152
00:05:41,630 --> 00:05:43,765
like that future
language in "Cloud Atlas."
153
00:05:43,798 --> 00:05:45,133
Oh, my God, I... Have you seen?
154
00:05:45,166 --> 00:05:49,272
That movie is wild.
155
00:05:49,305 --> 00:05:50,807
[Spiritual chanting continues]
156
00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:52,274
What were we talking
about right before that?
157
00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:53,909
All right, asshole.
158
00:05:53,942 --> 00:05:56,012
I thought that my revenge
was gonna be satisfying,
159
00:05:56,045 --> 00:05:58,915
but I guess I'll just
have to settle [blows]
160
00:05:58,947 --> 00:06:00,115
for petty.
161
00:06:00,149 --> 00:06:02,218
What... what do we got here?
162
00:06:02,250 --> 00:06:06,022
It's something from a
naturally occurring puddle
163
00:06:06,055 --> 00:06:07,257
inside the visitor bullpen.
164
00:06:07,289 --> 00:06:09,024
No, no. Don't, please, don't!
165
00:06:09,058 --> 00:06:10,593
- Ha!
- Not the vinyl!
166
00:06:10,625 --> 00:06:13,128
Oh, my God, the smell! [Gags]
167
00:06:13,161 --> 00:06:16,231
Aah! Aah! Aah!
168
00:06:16,264 --> 00:06:17,966
[Spiritual chanting continues]
169
00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:22,071
Aaaaaaah!
170
00:06:22,103 --> 00:06:25,707
It burns! It's burning my eyes!
171
00:06:25,740 --> 00:06:28,878
Make it stop. It burns!
172
00:06:33,115 --> 00:06:34,250
[Pants unzip]
173
00:06:34,283 --> 00:06:38,788
[Ringtone plays NFL
broadcast theme music]
174
00:06:38,820 --> 00:06:41,590
- What'd you decide, Jim?
- [Urinating]
175
00:06:41,623 --> 00:06:43,125
I'm torn, Joe Buck.
176
00:06:43,159 --> 00:06:45,825
I want the job, of course,
but the problem is Jules.
177
00:06:45,856 --> 00:06:48,341
I love her, and I'm terrified of her.
178
00:06:48,450 --> 00:06:49,731
Probably in equal measure.
179
00:06:49,825 --> 00:06:52,319
Look, I think I've given
you the wrong impression.
180
00:06:52,352 --> 00:06:54,256
Uh, I just wanted to do you a solid.
181
00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:57,993
I didn't volunteer to be the
guy you come to for life advice.
182
00:06:58,025 --> 00:06:59,860
You ever mad eye contact with someone
183
00:06:59,893 --> 00:07:01,028
while they stuck a finger
184
00:07:01,061 --> 00:07:02,698
farther and farther up your butt?
185
00:07:02,730 --> 00:07:04,865
And you don't know how
much more you can handle,
186
00:07:04,898 --> 00:07:06,033
but they do?
187
00:07:06,066 --> 00:07:07,802
I'm in the bathroom right now.
188
00:07:07,835 --> 00:07:09,270
Ah, just answer the question, Joe.
189
00:07:09,304 --> 00:07:10,934
I was born in Florida.
190
00:07:10,981 --> 00:07:12,727
Of course I've had a finger in my ass.
191
00:07:12,733 --> 00:07:15,471
Then you know what it's
like to be in love, Joe Buck.
192
00:07:15,777 --> 00:07:17,212
I'm hanging up now.
193
00:07:17,244 --> 00:07:18,312
Hey...
194
00:07:19,914 --> 00:07:22,274
Fucking Brockmire.
195
00:07:22,306 --> 00:07:25,721
Hey! I have great news.
196
00:07:25,754 --> 00:07:28,756
Don't tell me those bastards
agreed to accept responsibility.
197
00:07:28,790 --> 00:07:30,124
No, they kicked me off their property
198
00:07:30,157 --> 00:07:31,281
and file a restraining order against me.
199
00:07:31,345 --> 00:07:32,392
But then FEMA called and said
200
00:07:32,428 --> 00:07:34,416
that the last fire finally
went out on the field.
201
00:07:34,895 --> 00:07:38,420
So we can re-sod the grass
and play our last game.
202
00:07:38,452 --> 00:07:40,035
Are you ready?
203
00:07:40,068 --> 00:07:42,270
I mean, I got nowhere else to be.
204
00:07:42,302 --> 00:07:44,238
[Sighs]
205
00:07:44,271 --> 00:07:46,373
Jim: So, we have to do
what to pay off your loan?
206
00:07:46,407 --> 00:07:48,877
I have to sell a week's worth
of concessions is one game,
207
00:07:48,910 --> 00:07:50,627
and we have to win to stay above .500.
208
00:07:50,722 --> 00:07:52,014
Forgive my negativity,
209
00:07:52,047 --> 00:07:53,881
but you're not gonna
sell that much in one day.
210
00:07:53,915 --> 00:07:56,785
Nobody's gonna eat 15 hot dogs.
211
00:07:56,818 --> 00:07:58,854
[Rowdy laughter]
212
00:08:02,090 --> 00:08:03,892
They might drink 15 beers.
213
00:08:03,924 --> 00:08:05,427
You know, we never did better business
214
00:08:05,460 --> 00:08:07,195
than when we forfeited the Butler game
215
00:08:07,227 --> 00:08:08,864
and everybody just stayed and drank.
216
00:08:08,896 --> 00:08:10,498
All right, so we get the entire stadium
217
00:08:10,532 --> 00:08:12,267
to get as drunk as humanly possible.
218
00:08:12,299 --> 00:08:13,434
I love that plan.
219
00:08:13,467 --> 00:08:15,770
♪ Swing the bat, hit the ball ♪
220
00:08:15,804 --> 00:08:17,472
- ♪ Knock it right over the wall ♪
- Ahh.
221
00:08:17,504 --> 00:08:21,241
♪ It's time to play a baseball game ♪
222
00:08:21,275 --> 00:08:25,246
♪ Step right to the
plate and take your aim ♪
223
00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:28,183
♪ See the home team score the winning run ♪
224
00:08:28,215 --> 00:08:30,785
Okay, so, I posted about
you doing a live podcast
225
00:08:30,818 --> 00:08:33,921
on your Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook.
226
00:08:33,954 --> 00:08:35,956
Maybe we could also
live stream it, right?
227
00:08:35,990 --> 00:08:39,394
Maybe one of those, uh, PayPal
donate buttons generate some,
228
00:08:39,426 --> 00:08:42,163
uh... What do you call it?
Some crowdsource money, huh?
229
00:08:42,197 --> 00:08:45,900
Yeah. That's a... a great idea.
230
00:08:45,934 --> 00:08:47,135
What can I say?
231
00:08:47,168 --> 00:08:48,370
I learned from the best, didn't I?
232
00:08:48,402 --> 00:08:50,037
- [Slaps back]
- All right, here we go.
233
00:08:50,070 --> 00:08:52,506
♪ Let's play a baseball game ♪
234
00:08:52,540 --> 00:08:54,981
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen,
to Morristown Stadium.
235
00:08:55,004 --> 00:08:56,877
We have got a heck of a ballgame
236
00:08:56,910 --> 00:08:58,380
planned for you here this afternoon.
237
00:08:58,413 --> 00:09:01,149
Now, in order to keep
the Frackers right here
238
00:09:01,182 --> 00:09:03,021
in Morristown where they belong,
239
00:09:03,034 --> 00:09:04,362
we have decided to hold
240
00:09:04,405 --> 00:09:06,140
a stadium-wide drinkin' contest.
241
00:09:06,332 --> 00:09:09,941
That's right, a stadium-wide
drinkin' contest.
242
00:09:10,158 --> 00:09:12,160
The rules of this game are simple.
243
00:09:12,193 --> 00:09:14,328
After every inning, drink a beer.
244
00:09:14,362 --> 00:09:16,865
After every run scored, drink a beer.
245
00:09:16,897 --> 00:09:19,400
Heck, after ever
strikeout, drink a beer.
246
00:09:19,434 --> 00:09:22,357
Oh, if the guy sittin'
next to you drinks a beer,
247
00:09:22,413 --> 00:09:23,809
- you got to drink a beer.
- [Cheering]
248
00:09:23,873 --> 00:09:27,342
And drink a beer every time
you hear me say the magic words,
249
00:09:27,375 --> 00:09:29,663
"Hey, everybody, drink a beer!"
250
00:09:29,726 --> 00:09:33,448
So, good luck to us and
good luck to our Frackers.
251
00:09:33,481 --> 00:09:34,883
[Switch clicks]
252
00:09:34,915 --> 00:09:37,151
Are you gonna die?
253
00:09:37,184 --> 00:09:38,303
Probably not.
254
00:09:38,351 --> 00:09:41,222
But, hey, if somethin'
should happen, Charles,
255
00:09:41,256 --> 00:09:43,558
I just... I want to thank
you for all your assistance
256
00:09:43,591 --> 00:09:45,260
and your companionship. You just...
257
00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:47,495
believe it or not,
you're the best friend
258
00:09:47,527 --> 00:09:48,930
I have on this earth.
259
00:09:50,198 --> 00:09:52,434
That seemed to terrify you. Why is that?
260
00:09:52,467 --> 00:09:54,269
Well, it's 'cause...
261
00:09:54,301 --> 00:09:57,138
I could say the same thing about you.
262
00:09:58,502 --> 00:10:01,141
I really need to get my shit together.
263
00:10:01,174 --> 00:10:03,011
Oh, welcome to the
club, my young friend.
264
00:10:03,044 --> 00:10:04,446
Welcome to the club. I'll drink to that.
265
00:10:04,478 --> 00:10:06,146
To gettin' shit together.
266
00:10:06,179 --> 00:10:09,918
22 beers for the price of 21, guys.
267
00:10:09,950 --> 00:10:12,019
Hi again. Whoo-hoo!
268
00:10:12,053 --> 00:10:14,456
Yep, okay. Good on you.
269
00:10:14,488 --> 00:10:16,523
More beer... we need more beer!
270
00:10:16,557 --> 00:10:20,362
Jim: Yoshi workin' on an 0-2
count to the leadoff batter.
271
00:10:23,097 --> 00:10:24,933
[Yells]
272
00:10:24,966 --> 00:10:27,402
Oh, I haven't seen gas
like that from Yoshi
273
00:10:27,434 --> 00:10:29,470
since he played for the Yankees.
274
00:10:29,503 --> 00:10:32,039
That is the first strikeout
of the game, folks,
275
00:10:32,073 --> 00:10:35,175
and that means that we
are drinkin' a beer!
276
00:10:35,208 --> 00:10:38,045
- [Cheering]
- Everybody drink a beer.
277
00:10:38,078 --> 00:10:39,915
Cheers!
278
00:10:39,948 --> 00:10:43,318
♪♪
279
00:10:44,785 --> 00:10:45,801
Jim: You know what?
280
00:10:45,872 --> 00:10:47,443
Folks, everybody burp with me.
281
00:10:47,476 --> 00:10:48,812
Everybody, one, two, three...
282
00:10:48,845 --> 00:10:50,447
[All belching]
283
00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:52,182
Jules: I don't care if they puke.
284
00:10:52,215 --> 00:10:53,283
Just keep selling beer!
285
00:10:53,316 --> 00:10:55,452
Man: Whoo! Move it!
286
00:10:55,485 --> 00:10:56,952
Next.
287
00:10:56,986 --> 00:10:58,021
That do?
288
00:10:59,456 --> 00:11:00,856
Here is your change.
289
00:11:00,890 --> 00:11:02,726
Ah-haha!
290
00:11:02,759 --> 00:11:05,195
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
291
00:11:05,227 --> 00:11:09,031
Move y'all big ass! Ha ha ha!
292
00:11:09,064 --> 00:11:11,133
Jim: Little pop-up to
the third-base side.
293
00:11:11,167 --> 00:11:14,171
Uribe giving chase. Does he have room?
294
00:11:14,203 --> 00:11:15,938
- He does!
- [Cheers and applause]
295
00:11:15,971 --> 00:11:17,808
That'll end the third,
296
00:11:17,841 --> 00:11:21,712
and that means that we are
drinkin' a beer, Morristown!
297
00:11:21,745 --> 00:11:24,214
- Everybody drink a beer!
- [Tab pops]
298
00:11:24,246 --> 00:11:26,482
Ha! Salute.
299
00:11:26,515 --> 00:11:28,017
[Cheers and applause]
300
00:11:29,218 --> 00:11:32,822
No sipping, everybody.
Chugging only. Come on.
301
00:11:36,893 --> 00:11:40,130
Man: Yeah, Pedro!
302
00:11:41,430 --> 00:11:44,100
[Slurring] All right,
bot... bottom of the fifth.
303
00:11:44,134 --> 00:11:46,002
Oh, here he comes.
304
00:11:46,034 --> 00:11:49,632
Folks, if you are feeling the
breeze out there in left field,
305
00:11:49,672 --> 00:11:50,774
that is coming from
the bat of John Elton,
306
00:11:50,807 --> 00:11:53,210
who has struck out
swingin' three times today.
307
00:11:53,242 --> 00:11:54,977
Hey! Shut up!
308
00:11:55,010 --> 00:11:56,512
Hey, you shut up.
309
00:11:56,545 --> 00:12:00,217
Just... just concentrate
on the ball for once.
310
00:12:02,351 --> 00:12:06,923
Oh! Somebody just set
that vacuum on blow!
311
00:12:06,956 --> 00:12:09,426
Home run for John Elton!
312
00:12:09,458 --> 00:12:12,027
That just made the score 1-0.
313
00:12:12,061 --> 00:12:13,096
My goodness!
314
00:12:13,129 --> 00:12:16,298
That means that we are drinkin' a beer!
315
00:12:16,332 --> 00:12:19,770
Drink a beer, everybody.
316
00:12:19,803 --> 00:12:21,471
Mmm!
317
00:12:21,504 --> 00:12:25,958
That is the unlikeliest
beer I have ever drunk.
318
00:12:26,012 --> 00:12:27,915
Home run for John Elton.
319
00:12:27,990 --> 00:12:30,212
Oh! Well, that's for you, too, son.
320
00:12:30,246 --> 00:12:32,882
That's for you. Congratulations.
321
00:12:32,915 --> 00:12:33,983
Mm!
322
00:12:34,016 --> 00:12:37,121
[Cheers and applause]
323
00:12:39,521 --> 00:12:43,349
All right, now, it's time for
the seventh-inning stretch.
324
00:12:43,460 --> 00:12:45,588
Or you... you can just stay sitting
325
00:12:45,594 --> 00:12:47,269
if standing is too hard for you.
326
00:12:47,340 --> 00:12:48,498
Whoo!
327
00:12:48,530 --> 00:12:52,234
Anyway, mm, mm, mm.
328
00:12:52,268 --> 00:12:54,237
Ohh.
329
00:12:54,270 --> 00:12:56,840
Mwah! [Grunts]
330
00:12:56,872 --> 00:12:59,375
Hey, everybody. Hey, Morristown.
331
00:12:59,409 --> 00:13:02,345
Why do men do that at the urinal?
332
00:13:02,377 --> 00:13:05,881
Why do they lean their
head on the... on the wall?
333
00:13:05,914 --> 00:13:07,983
What's up with that?
334
00:13:08,016 --> 00:13:10,486
- Anyway...
- Keep 'em comin'!
335
00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:14,457
Jules: Guys, not throwing it, please.
336
00:13:14,490 --> 00:13:17,394
Oh, this microphone
feels cool on my head.
337
00:13:17,427 --> 00:13:20,964
[Adding machine rattling]
338
00:13:21,995 --> 00:13:22,966
[Exhales sharply]
339
00:13:22,999 --> 00:13:24,467
Everybody...
340
00:13:24,500 --> 00:13:28,171
Ooh, hoo, everybody's feelin' it now.
341
00:13:28,203 --> 00:13:30,207
I know that I am.
342
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:31,875
[Chuckles] Whoa.
343
00:13:31,908 --> 00:13:34,443
M-Morristown, um...
344
00:13:34,476 --> 00:13:36,045
- [Door opens]
- Jim, we did it!
345
00:13:36,078 --> 00:13:37,513
[Laughing] We did it!
346
00:13:37,547 --> 00:13:39,082
We made more than enough
to pay off the loan.
347
00:13:39,115 --> 00:13:41,284
- You can stop drinking.
- Oh, that's so good.
348
00:13:41,317 --> 00:13:43,220
That's so good!
349
00:13:43,252 --> 00:13:44,987
Oh, my God!
350
00:13:45,020 --> 00:13:46,890
What are you doing? Stop!
351
00:13:46,923 --> 00:13:50,125
I'm celebratin'. Come
on, you got to celebrate.
352
00:13:50,159 --> 00:13:51,561
We'll still have to win the game.
353
00:13:51,593 --> 00:13:53,896
Uh, wha...
354
00:13:53,929 --> 00:13:57,433
We're not winnin'? Come
on. What's the score?
355
00:13:57,467 --> 00:13:59,302
Pfft!
356
00:13:59,335 --> 00:14:01,905
I'm drunk. [Laughs]
357
00:14:01,938 --> 00:14:03,572
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm drunk.
358
00:14:03,606 --> 00:14:04,908
God damn it, I'm drunk.
359
00:14:04,941 --> 00:14:06,910
Jim, we're up by a run,
360
00:14:06,943 --> 00:14:08,645
but the bases are loaded with no outs
361
00:14:08,678 --> 00:14:10,112
in the top of the ninth.
362
00:14:10,145 --> 00:14:12,946
- Oh, that is not good.
- No.
363
00:14:13,073 --> 00:14:14,303
- So I am drinking a beer.
- Don't...
364
00:14:14,486 --> 00:14:16,452
- No, no, no, stop, stop.
- Stop, please.
365
00:14:16,486 --> 00:14:20,423
Jules, when'd you get here?
366
00:14:20,456 --> 00:14:23,058
Hey, how we doin'... doin' on money?
367
00:14:23,092 --> 00:14:24,593
Oh, dear God.
368
00:14:24,626 --> 00:14:26,262
I gotta pee. Oh, my...
369
00:14:26,295 --> 00:14:27,330
Ah, pfft!
370
00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:32,995
Come on.
371
00:14:33,028 --> 00:14:34,296
Ah!
372
00:14:34,328 --> 00:14:36,263
Oh, shit.
373
00:14:36,297 --> 00:14:38,667
He finally snapped.
374
00:14:40,235 --> 00:14:42,638
[Clapping]
375
00:14:42,671 --> 00:14:44,306
Time-out.
376
00:14:44,339 --> 00:14:45,741
Time, time, time.
377
00:14:45,773 --> 00:14:47,075
Announcer's time.
378
00:14:47,107 --> 00:14:48,342
Bring it in.
379
00:14:48,375 --> 00:14:50,077
Frackers.
380
00:14:50,110 --> 00:14:51,812
Come on, bring it in, move it!
381
00:14:51,846 --> 00:14:54,349
Whoo. All right.
382
00:14:54,381 --> 00:14:56,083
How you doin', Yoshi?
383
00:14:56,116 --> 00:14:58,152
All right, good. Yo, hustle it up.
384
00:14:58,186 --> 00:15:00,355
Good hustle, good hustle. [Claps]
385
00:15:00,388 --> 00:15:02,157
Ohh. [Laughs]
386
00:15:02,190 --> 00:15:06,128
You guys are great. You, I love. Mwah!
387
00:15:06,161 --> 00:15:08,063
Mwah!
388
00:15:08,096 --> 00:15:09,664
Oh! You sweaty.
389
00:15:09,697 --> 00:15:12,701
[Sobbing]
390
00:15:12,734 --> 00:15:15,170
Why is Brockmire sobbing,
telling us that he loves us?
391
00:15:15,202 --> 00:15:16,672
Because I do love you!
392
00:15:16,705 --> 00:15:18,440
Because you guys, you play the game...
393
00:15:18,472 --> 00:15:19,874
Wait.
394
00:15:19,908 --> 00:15:21,677
... that you all fell
in love with as kids.
395
00:15:21,710 --> 00:15:24,146
And that's... it's beautiful.
396
00:15:24,178 --> 00:15:25,913
[Snickers] That's beautiful.
397
00:15:25,946 --> 00:15:27,148
It's beautiful, right?
398
00:15:27,182 --> 00:15:29,317
Yeah, we'll just all gently agree
399
00:15:29,350 --> 00:15:30,985
with whatever he says, okay?
400
00:15:31,019 --> 00:15:34,255
Hey, look. It's your pal, Charles.
401
00:15:34,288 --> 00:15:35,790
- Charles.
- Charles.
402
00:15:35,823 --> 00:15:37,925
- What are you...
- Go get him.
403
00:15:37,959 --> 00:15:40,062
Life is hard for you
'cause you're black.
404
00:15:40,095 --> 00:15:41,430
- Oh.
- And that's... that's insane.
405
00:15:41,462 --> 00:15:43,197
- It's crazy, man.
- Come on.
406
00:15:43,230 --> 00:15:44,398
It's wrong. Let's go.
407
00:15:44,432 --> 00:15:46,067
What year is it?
408
00:15:46,100 --> 00:15:48,470
It's... it's... it's the
current year that... that it is?
409
00:15:48,503 --> 00:15:50,004
- Absolutely.
- That's not right.
410
00:15:50,038 --> 00:15:51,239
That's right, come on.
411
00:15:51,272 --> 00:15:52,340
Wait, I forgot to tell them one thing.
412
00:15:52,373 --> 00:15:53,408
- No, no, it's fine.
- No.
413
00:15:53,441 --> 00:15:54,408
They'll be fine. They'll be fine.
414
00:15:54,442 --> 00:15:55,576
- They'll be fine without it.
- All right, easy.
415
00:15:55,610 --> 00:15:58,245
Yoshi's running on fumes,
so somebody has to step up.
416
00:15:58,278 --> 00:16:00,081
Come on, guys, I signed you all
417
00:16:00,115 --> 00:16:02,084
'cause I saw that you all had something.
418
00:16:02,116 --> 00:16:03,851
Or had something left.
419
00:16:03,884 --> 00:16:06,120
Danny, I watched you turn
a gorgeous double play
420
00:16:06,153 --> 00:16:07,822
at a juco in upstate New York.
421
00:16:07,855 --> 00:16:09,924
Uribe, a scout sent me
a link to your highlights
422
00:16:09,957 --> 00:16:10,759
in the Venezuelan league.
423
00:16:10,792 --> 00:16:12,427
I tracked you down that night.
424
00:16:12,460 --> 00:16:16,098
And, John Elton... John Elton.
425
00:16:16,130 --> 00:16:18,766
Honestly, that was a mistake.
426
00:16:18,799 --> 00:16:21,402
I asked an agent for Juan
Eltun, and he misheard me.
427
00:16:21,436 --> 00:16:22,471
But...
428
00:16:22,504 --> 00:16:24,773
Actually explains a lot.
429
00:16:24,806 --> 00:16:26,408
But you just hit the go-ahead home run.
430
00:16:26,441 --> 00:16:27,875
- Yeah.
- Yeah. -Yeah.
431
00:16:27,908 --> 00:16:29,343
If he can do that,
432
00:16:29,376 --> 00:16:31,746
just imagine what the
rest of you are capable of.
433
00:16:31,779 --> 00:16:32,980
- Yes!
- All right.
434
00:16:33,014 --> 00:16:35,783
I know this wasn't
your dream to be here,
435
00:16:35,817 --> 00:16:36,985
but it is mine.
436
00:16:37,018 --> 00:16:39,387
So please, someone get out
there and make a God damn play!
437
00:16:39,419 --> 00:16:40,855
[Cheering]
438
00:16:40,889 --> 00:16:43,124
- Let's go!
- Uno, dos, tres...
439
00:16:43,158 --> 00:16:45,527
All: Frackers!
440
00:16:45,560 --> 00:16:47,262
For you, Miss Jules! For you!
441
00:16:47,294 --> 00:16:49,363
Where'd you get that?
442
00:16:49,397 --> 00:16:50,866
I don't know.
443
00:16:50,898 --> 00:16:52,868
I just looked down, and there it was.
444
00:16:52,900 --> 00:16:55,469
Tell you what... I feel naked,
445
00:16:55,503 --> 00:16:58,474
uh, watching the game without
a microphone in my hand.
446
00:17:00,575 --> 00:17:01,777
How's this?
447
00:17:01,809 --> 00:17:03,077
Where'd you get that?
448
00:17:03,111 --> 00:17:04,379
I don't know.
449
00:17:04,412 --> 00:17:05,513
I just looked down, and it was there.
450
00:17:05,547 --> 00:17:08,482
- You're a prodigy. God damn you, prodigy.
- Thank you.
451
00:17:08,516 --> 00:17:10,252
- [Microphone feedback squeaks]
- All right, hey.
452
00:17:10,285 --> 00:17:12,387
- Drunken idiots of Morristown...
- [Cheers and applause]
453
00:17:12,420 --> 00:17:13,822
Yeah, hello.
454
00:17:13,855 --> 00:17:16,091
Turn your attention to the field.
455
00:17:16,124 --> 00:17:18,160
You will see the greatest victory
456
00:17:18,192 --> 00:17:20,461
in the history of Morristown right now.
457
00:17:20,494 --> 00:17:22,230
Come on, Frackers!
458
00:17:25,133 --> 00:17:27,201
From your lips to
Willie Stargell's ears.
459
00:17:27,234 --> 00:17:29,870
Come on now, Frackers!
Come on, cheer 'em.
460
00:17:29,903 --> 00:17:31,839
- Go, let's go!
- Oh, Yoshi.
461
00:17:31,873 --> 00:17:33,074
You got this, mang.
462
00:17:33,106 --> 00:17:34,509
Joo got this.
463
00:17:34,541 --> 00:17:37,378
Man: Go, Yoshi.
464
00:17:37,412 --> 00:17:38,980
Come on, Yoshi!
465
00:17:42,282 --> 00:17:44,318
♪♪
466
00:18:00,268 --> 00:18:02,270
Oh, nice grab by Uribe.
467
00:18:03,231 --> 00:18:04,299
Round the horn.
468
00:18:11,645 --> 00:18:16,283
♪♪
469
00:18:16,317 --> 00:18:17,419
Umpire: Out!
470
00:18:17,451 --> 00:18:19,954
[Cheers and applause]
471
00:18:22,022 --> 00:18:24,892
Triple play! Triple play!
472
00:18:24,925 --> 00:18:27,261
Whoo!
473
00:18:28,328 --> 00:18:30,898
Yeah!
474
00:18:30,932 --> 00:18:33,300
We did it!
475
00:18:33,334 --> 00:18:34,635
I never seen it!
476
00:18:34,669 --> 00:18:37,138
I never seen a triple
play to win a game!
477
00:18:37,171 --> 00:18:40,107
Baseball lives in Morristown!
478
00:18:40,141 --> 00:18:41,877
[Cheering continues]
479
00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:00,595
Whoo!
480
00:19:00,627 --> 00:19:02,496
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
481
00:19:02,529 --> 00:19:04,331
Yeah, baby!
482
00:19:04,365 --> 00:19:05,601
[Screaming]
483
00:19:11,005 --> 00:19:11,973
[Gunshot]
484
00:19:12,006 --> 00:19:14,409
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
485
00:19:14,442 --> 00:19:15,442
[Gunshot]
486
00:19:15,476 --> 00:19:17,012
Oh, my God! Yeah!
487
00:19:17,045 --> 00:19:20,515
[Cheering continues]
488
00:19:20,547 --> 00:19:22,183
[Gunshot echoes]
489
00:19:29,723 --> 00:19:32,059
Well, good morning, sunshine.
490
00:19:32,093 --> 00:19:34,262
Hey.
491
00:19:34,295 --> 00:19:35,596
[Sighs]
492
00:19:36,780 --> 00:19:38,475
Uh...
493
00:19:40,413 --> 00:19:41,815
I'm sorry.
494
00:19:45,038 --> 00:19:48,309
Atlanta wants to audition
me to be their new announcer.
495
00:19:48,343 --> 00:19:51,647
They want me to finish off
the season at AAA New Orleans.
496
00:19:54,082 --> 00:19:55,249
[Inhales sharply] Look, you know
497
00:19:55,282 --> 00:19:56,617
that if I have a path to The Show,
498
00:19:56,651 --> 00:19:59,488
I just... I have to take it.
499
00:20:00,047 --> 00:20:01,749
I know. [Chuckles]
500
00:20:01,781 --> 00:20:05,118
Jules, come with me.
501
00:20:05,247 --> 00:20:07,150
[Laughs]
502
00:20:07,461 --> 00:20:09,698
You know I can't.
503
00:20:09,730 --> 00:20:11,432
[Sighs]
504
00:20:11,465 --> 00:20:14,269
I'm not going to abandon my team.
505
00:20:14,301 --> 00:20:15,336
Why not?
506
00:20:15,369 --> 00:20:17,304
God, you have this fantasy
that if you save the team,
507
00:20:17,337 --> 00:20:18,472
you're gonna save the town.
508
00:20:18,506 --> 00:20:21,309
But you're plugging a dam
with a dozen other leaks in it.
509
00:20:21,342 --> 00:20:24,079
How do you think this place
got to be the way it is?
510
00:20:24,112 --> 00:20:26,949
Anytime anybody made
anything, then they just left.
511
00:20:28,415 --> 00:20:30,050
If you really wanted me to come,
512
00:20:30,084 --> 00:20:31,686
you wouldn't have packed
your bags before you asked.
513
00:20:31,719 --> 00:20:34,422
Oh, screw the... hey.
Screw the bags, okay?
514
00:20:34,454 --> 00:20:36,557
- I want you with me. I love you.
- No!
515
00:20:36,590 --> 00:20:38,993
You don't get to say that while
you're walking out the door.
516
00:20:39,027 --> 00:20:42,463
Ah, see? This is why I did
not want to get involved, okay?
517
00:20:42,497 --> 00:20:44,164
- I didn't want get...
- Trapped?
518
00:20:44,198 --> 00:20:45,567
I wasn't gonna say "trapped," all right?
519
00:20:45,599 --> 00:20:47,267
I was gonna use a different
word than "trapped."
520
00:20:47,300 --> 00:20:49,471
A-a nicer word.
521
00:20:49,503 --> 00:20:51,038
Uh, enmeshed.
522
00:20:56,711 --> 00:20:58,278
I've never trapped a man in my life.
523
00:20:58,311 --> 00:20:59,580
You want to leave? Leave.
524
00:20:59,614 --> 00:21:01,125
Wha... [Sighs]
525
00:21:01,189 --> 00:21:03,317
I don't wanna leave. I
have to leave, Jules.
526
00:21:03,351 --> 00:21:04,022
I...
527
00:21:04,133 --> 00:21:06,288
Yeah, I know, sure.
528
00:21:11,092 --> 00:21:13,128
Take care of yourself.
529
00:21:18,633 --> 00:21:19,634
Wait.
530
00:21:23,503 --> 00:21:24,605
About a year from now,
531
00:21:24,638 --> 00:21:26,807
you're gonna realize the
colossal mistake you just made.
532
00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:28,475
You're gonna come crawling back.
533
00:21:28,509 --> 00:21:30,077
You're gonna want to fix it.
534
00:21:30,111 --> 00:21:32,614
You're gonna try to sweet-talk me.
535
00:21:32,646 --> 00:21:36,417
Let me save you the time
and tell you right now.
536
00:21:36,451 --> 00:21:38,644
Go fuck yourself.
537
00:21:38,708 --> 00:21:42,144
You're dead to me.
538
00:21:42,623 --> 00:21:44,159
Now you can go.
539
00:21:50,397 --> 00:21:52,059
Can I just... can I grab my bag?
540
00:21:52,065 --> 00:21:53,067
Leave!
541
00:21:56,104 --> 00:21:58,306
- Please?
- Now!
542
00:21:59,473 --> 00:22:02,676
[Door closes, bagpipes playing]
543
00:22:15,490 --> 00:22:17,325
Charles: Where's your luggage?
544
00:22:21,988 --> 00:22:24,298
I am going to get drunk and pass out.
545
00:22:27,501 --> 00:22:29,537
Wake me when we get to Louisiana.
546
00:22:29,569 --> 00:22:32,406
[Sighs] Sure thing.
547
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:34,709
[Engine starts]
548
00:22:41,449 --> 00:22:44,419
So, this, uh... this apartment
you're getting in New Orleans,
549
00:22:44,451 --> 00:22:45,854
I'm assuming it's a two-bedroom
550
00:22:45,886 --> 00:22:48,355
'cause I don't know if I
can handle a Bert and Ernie,
551
00:22:48,388 --> 00:22:50,257
twin-bed situation.
552
00:22:50,290 --> 00:22:53,360
I actually understood that reference.
553
00:22:53,401 --> 00:22:57,468
Synced and corrected by Dragoniod for
- www.addic7ed.com -
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