All language subtitles for Dennis.the.Menace.1959.S04E07.The.New.Principal.1080p.PCOK.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-Dooky_track1_[eng]

- You could handle that
glass a lot easier,

son, if you took your glove off.

- I better not, Dad.

You know I'm pitching the big
game for our school tomorrow,

and the glove has to
feel right on my hand.

- He's even been
wearing it to bed.

- It helps me when I'm dreaming.

Last night I struck out
Mickey Mantle three times.

- [laughs] You going to
be able to do as well

against Middlebury tomorrow?

- I have to, Dad.

If we beat them, we're
champions of the whole district.

How about coming
over this afternoon

and watching us practice?

- Oh, I'd like to, but I'll be
out of town on business, son.

- Jeepers, will you be away
tomorrow when we play?

- No, I'll be back this evening.

I wouldn't miss that game
for anything in the world.

- I hope I pitch good.

- Pitch how?

- I hope I pitch well.

I had a hard time
beating out Johnny Brady.

- I'm sure you'll do
a good job, dear.

- Well, I gotta get going now.

- My, you look handsome
in your new clothes.

- I like 'em too.

Aw, jeepers, Mom,
why do you always

have to put raw
carrots in my lunchbox?

- Because they're good for you.

And you eat them.

- OK.

But I bet you
Whitey Ford doesn't

have to eat raw carrots.

Bye, Mom.

Bye, Dad.

- Bye, dear.

- So long, son.

I'd better get going, too.

- Well, aren't you going to
help me clear the table?

- Golly honey, Whitey Ford
doesn't have to-- well,

he's married.

He probably does.

[theme music]

- Hey, hi, Mr. Wilson!

- Morning, Dennis.

- Catch!

- What?

Well, at least you could have
given me a little warning.

- That was my curve, Mr. Wilson.

You have to sort of
sneak that one over.

- That was pretty
sneaky, all right.

- Hey, get back there and
I'll show you my hummer.

That's what I call my fast ball.

It really hums.

- Well, I'd like to
hear it, but my wife

has asked me to go and
pick up some things

at Quigley's market.

- That's on my way to school.

I'll walk with you.

- All right.

Oh, here, Dennis, I'll
give you a hand with those.

- Oh, thanks, Mr. Wilson.

- You all set for that game
tomorrow with Middlebury?

- Yes, sir.

We're having our last practice
today when school's out.

Want to come and watch?

- Oh, I haven't missed
a practice yet.

As one of the committee
that bought your uniforms,

I have a personal
interest in that team.

- Hello, Dennis, John.

- Hi.

- Hi, Mr. Finch.

- Dennis, here.

This is what I want
you to do tomorrow.

- I'll sure try, Mr. Finch.

- You don't have to
worry about Dennis.

His curve gets
sneakier every day.

- Tell Tommy Anderson
his catcher's mitt's

come in at the post office.

He can pick it up
here this afternoon.

- OK, bye, Mr. Finch.

- Bye, John.
- Goodbye.

- Hi, Mr. Quigley.

- Oh, hello, Dennis.

John.
- Hi.

- I, uh, I have a shopping
list for you to fill out.

- Wait a minute.

I want to check out
our star flinger here.

How's the old wing, Dennis?

- It feels fine, Mr. Quigley.

- You got time to
peg me a couple?

- Well, I have to make sure
and be on time this morning.

You see, we're meeting our new
school principal, Mr. Spivey.

- Oh, that's right, he does
start today, doesn't he?

- Yeah, and our teacher
says he's real strict.

But I could take a couple and
then run the rest of the way.

- OK, let's have
a little warm-up.

- Want my glove, Mr. Quigley?

- No, no, you keep it.

All I need are my two hands.

- I throw pretty hard.

Won't it hurt your fingers?

- He doesn't have any fingers.

Just thumbs.

- We'll show him.

Come on, now.

Let's see your hummer.

Hah!

- Good catch, Mr. Quigley.

- Well, accidents will happen.

- Accident, my eye.

I'm a ballplayer.

Now Dennis, I'm going to throw
it back with a curve on it.

Watch it break.

[glass shatters]

- Oh, that really broke.

- Uh, baseball player--

- I gotta go now, Mr. Quigley.

Bye, Mr. Wilson.

- Eh, bye, Dennis.

- I can't understand
how that happened.

- Well, it's nothing that any
ham-handed, middle-aged man

couldn't have done.

- Oh, thanks a lot.

- But let's get back to the
grocery business, shall we?

- Yeah.

- Now about my shopping list,
I want three pounds of apples,

and I'll take-- uh, you
better let me do that.

You may miss the bag.

- Mr. Spivey is on his way to
speak to us all now, class.

I want you all to be on
your very best behavior.

- I'm always on my best behavior.

A lady has to behave herself.

- That's quite right, Margaret.

And you boys remember
that you're gentleman.

- Tell me, Miss Elmore,
technically speaking,

are we old enough to
be called gentlemen?

- Of course you are, Dennis.

- That's a pretty dumb question.

- Don't you call me
dumb, Johnny Brady.

MISS ELMORE (OFFSCREEN): All
right now, that's enough.

Settle down and make
me proud of you.

As I said before, Mr. Spivey
believes in strict discipline.

- Good morning, Miss Elmore.

- Good morning, Mr. Spivey.

Welcome to our class.

- Thank you.

My name is Albert
J. Spivey, and I

am the new principal
of this school.

All right, children,
you may speak.

STUDENTS: How do
you do, Mr. Spivey?

- I don't wish to
interrupt your studies.

Therefore, my remarks
will be brief.

All I demand is that you
work hard, make good grades,

conduct yourselves properly,
and give me no trouble.

Do you understand?

STUDENTS: Yes, Mr. Spivey.

- Good.

Now a few questions to see what
progress you have been making.

Young man, what is your name?

- Tommy Anderson, sir.

- Correction.

Your name is Thomas Anderson.

- But everybody calls me Tommy.

- Well, use of nicknames
makes for very sloppy habits.

Now tell me, Thomas, who was
president of the United States

before President Eisenhower?

- Harry-- I mean
Harold Truman, sir.

- Harry is correct.

- But you just said--

- Don't argue the point.

It wastes valuable time.

Just sit down.

Young lady, what is your name?

- My name is Margaret
Harrington, sir,

and I'm the school cheerleader.

And I am going to be an atomic
scientist when I grow up

because I have a very high IQ.

- Oh?

Well, tell me, Margaret, what is
the capital of North Carolina?

- The capital of North
Carolina is Raleigh,

and the capital of South
Carolina is Columbia.

And the capital of North
Dakota is Bismarck,

and the capital of
South Dakota is--

- All--all right, that will do.

- I know all 50 of them.

- Splendid.

Just sit down and let
this young man speak.

- My name is Dennis
Mitchell, sir.

- Dennis, tell me, when I use
the phrase "great American,"

who's name springs to mind?

- Mickey Mantle, sir.

- Who?

- Mickey Mantle.

He can really slam
the old horse hide.

- Dennis is the star
pitcher of our team,

and they're playing
a big game tomorrow,

so naturally he has
baseball on his mind.

- I have little
interest in athletics.

They interfere with education.

You may sit down, Dennis,
and let that young man speak.

- My name is John
Roger Brady III, sir.

- Well, John, who do consider
our greatest American?

- George Washington, sir.

MR. SPIVEY (OFFSCREEN):
Thank you, you may sit down.

Miss Elmore, do I have time
to tell the children something

about General
Washington's campaigns?

- Of course, Mr. Spivey.

- May I use this map?

- I'll get you a stool
to stand on, Mr. Spivey.

You're not tall enough to reach.

- None of your
impertinence, young man.

- What?

I-- re-- realize I'm somewhat
shorter than the average man,

but I will not allow rude
remarks to be made about it.

- I wasn't being
rude, Mr. Spivey.

I just wanted to help.

- Oh, I'm sure that's
true, Mr. Spivey.

I've never known
Dennis to be impudent.

He's a good student and
captain of the baseball team.

- Well, I can tell you
this, Miss Elmore.

If there's any further
impudence from young Mitchell,

the team will be
without a captain.

That will be all, Miss Elmore.

[school bell rings]

- All right, children,
I heard the bell, too.

Just put your papers
on the desk as you

file out in an orderly fashion.

- Let him go, Froggy.

We got work to do.

- What's up, Johnny?

- Am I a better pitcher
than Dennis Mitchell?

- Sure you are, Johnny.

- You bet I am.

And I'm gonna fix
his wagon so I get

to pitch against
Middlebury tomorrow.

- How you going to do that?

- You'll see.

Come on.

- Here's his paper.

I got an idea.

And when I get through, it'll
take care of Dennis all right.

- Boy, Johnny, you
sure are smart.

- Can't deny it.

Go watch the door.

- Now, children,
this morning we were

studying some of our
pioneer forefathers.

Tomorrow for your
homework, I want you all

to bring in a short
composition on the subject.

- Dennis Mitchell, come up here.

- Me, sir?

Up there?
- What is it, Mr. Spivey?

Is it anything I can--

- Just let me handle
this, Miss Elmore.

Is this your paper, young man?

- Yes, sir, that's my
arithmetic lesson.

See, there's my
name up at the top.

- So naturally, this
disgusting drawing of me

is your work, too?

- I didn't draw that, Mr. Spivey.

Somebody else must have.

- Oh, Mr. Spivey, I just can't
believe Dennis did this.

It's not like him.

- I have the evidence
right here, Miss Elmore.

For this outrage, you
will stay after school

and write on the
blackboard 500 times,

"I am sorry for what I did."

- Stay after school?

But I have to
practice with the team

so we can win the
championship tomorrow.

- Oh, I wouldn't let
that concern you.

You're no longer on the team.

- But I'm the pitcher, and
I've been working awful hard!

- My decision is final.

See that he carries out
my orders, m Miss Elmore.

[school bell rings]

- Tough luck, Dennis.

But look at it this way.

It's for the good of the school.

- How come, Johnny?

- If you pitch the game
tomorrow, we might win.

With me pitching,
we're sure to win.

So long.

- We're sure to lose.

You can pitch rings around him.

- I'm so disappointed, Dennis.

I'd much rather
lead cheers for you.

- Thanks, Margaret.

- I guess the cross Mr. Spivey
bears is that he's a short man.

I don't know what I can do,
under the circumstances.

If your father would come down
here and vouch for you, Dennis,

Mr. Spivey should respect the
opinion of a boy's father.

You want to call him?

- My dad's out of
town on business.

- Oh, that is too bad.
- Yeah.

Well, I gotta get over
to Finch's and get

my new mitt, Dennis.

I'll see you later.

- The man is being completely
unjust, Mr. Quigley.

Just because he's
principal, he thinks

he's smarter than everyone.

- Now, now, Margaret, let's
not be disrespectful.

Mr. Spivey must be smart,
or he wouldn't be principal.

- Not only that, but he took
Dennis off the baseball team

and he won't let
him pitch tomorrow.

- I said he-- he what?

He took him off the team?

What's the matter with
that idiot principal,

the stupid lemonhead?

Doesn't he know
the team will get

murdered without
their star pitcher?

- He couldn't care less.

I'll take this one.

- Does Dennis's dad
know about this?

- No, sir.

Miss Elmore said Dennis's
dad could probably

straighten things out, but
Mr. Mitchell's out of town.

- Oh, fine, just when the
boy needs his dad most.

- He certainly does.

- Confound that principal.

Maybe if I--

- Tommy, Tommy, wait a minute!

What do you mean, he
took him off the team?

He can't do that.

- He already did it, Mr. Finch.

He's a real tough principal.

- Punishing a boy for
something he didn't do

is bad enough, but what
about the game tomorrow?

Dennis is the best
pitcher we've got.

- He sure is.

Middlebury'll slaughter us.

I wish Dennis's dad were here.

Miss Elmore said if the boy's
father would vouch for him,

the principal would
probably accept that.

- Mitchell won't be home
until tonight, huh?

- No, sir.

Well, I better get
back to practice.

Swell mitt, Mr. Finch.

- By George, this is a crime.

- Well, here you are, Dennis.

- Oh, hi, Mr. Wilson.

- I came over to
watch you practice.

The boys said I'd find you here.

They also said you'd been
dropped from the team.

Now is that true?

- Mr. Spivey got sore at me and
made me stay in and write this.

- I am sorry for-- oh, sit down.

I want to hear about this.

- Well, OK.

I'm kinda tired of
writing that anyhow.

Especially since I
don't feel sorry.

- Well, what happened?

- I guess it all started
when he couldn't

reach that map up there.

You see, he's kind
of a short man.

Well--

- Yes, this is he.

Who?

Dennis Mitchell's father?

- Uh, yes.

Uh, Henry Mitchell's my name.

I understand you've taken my
boy off the baseball team.

- Well, I-- I do not care
to discuss these matters

on the phone, but
you're perfectly

free to see me here at any time.

- All right, I'll just do that.

I'm not far from there
and I'll be right over.

- Oh, very well.

- Oh?

Well, I'll go and talk
to that man right now.

We'll see about that.

- Oh, no, don't, Mr. Wilson!

He's already mad at me.

And if you make him any madder--

- Now, now, relax.

Relax.

I'm not going to make him mad.

- It's awful easy.

- I'm just going to tell him
that I'm a neighbor of yours,

that I know you very well.

- He won't listen
to you, Mr. Wilson.

Miss Elmore said
if my dad was here,

he'd have to listen to Dad.

- Oh, yeah.

He would have to listen to
a boy's father, wouldn't he?

Has he met your dad, Dennis?

- No, sir.

Mr. Spivey just started today.

- Oh, yes.

Yes.

[knock]

- Uh, Mr. Spivey, I presume.

- Yes.

- My name is Henry Mitchell,
Dennis Mitchell's father.

- Oh, how do you
do, Mr. Mitchell?

I've been expecting you.

- Oh?

Um, I know the whole story
about Dennis, Mr. Spivey,

and I dropped in to tell you
that you're misjudging the boy.

- I always crack down hard at the
slightest sign of disrespect,

and that's what I'm
doing with Dennis.

- Uh, eh, but this
picture, Mr. Spivey,

Dennis would never
draw a thing like that.

Besides, the school
needs him to pitch

that baseball game tomorrow.

- We've already been
over that, Mr. Mitchell.

I told you, Dennis
is off the team.

- You told me?

[knock]

- Oh, Mr. Spivey?

I'm Henry Mitchell,
Dennis's father.

I came to-- John--

BOTH: What are you doing here?

- I'm here to talk
about my son, Dennis.

Dennis Mitchell.

Now Mr. Spivey and
I are very busy,

so why don't you run along?

- P-pardon me, but did
you call him John?

- Well, of course I did.

That's his name.

- Yeah, w-well, it is my
name-- John Henry Mitchell.

Most people call me Henry.

Dennis calls me Dad.
- I see.

Did you phone me a
while ago, Mr. Mitchell?

- Yes, I did.

I called and said
I'd be right over.

- Oh.

- Ooh, you knothead!

Why don't you stay out of this?

- Why don't you?

I can handle this
better than you can!

- Well, this is a very
interesting situation.

Uh, sit down, Mr. Mitchell.

You too, Mr. Mitchell.

Good.

Well, gentlemen, I have
long been an ardent student

of biology, but this
is the first time

I've ever heard of a
boy who has two fathers.

Now could one of you
kindly explain this to me?

- Well, it's very
simple, Mr. Spivy.

This man is confused.

The important thing is Dennis.

Now you're mistaken
about that boy of mine.

- All right, all right, I can
see this is getting us no place.

Well, fortunately,
there is one person

who can settle this-- Dennis.

- You're right.

I'll go and get it.

You sit right there, Mr. Spivey.

I'll--
- We will all go talk to Dennis.

- You're messing this all up.

Why don't you go home?

- What?

And admit that I'm a liar?

I'll do no such--

- After you, gentlemen.

- Well, Dennis, your
old dad is back again.

- He is?

- Dennis, both these
confused gentleman

claim to be your father.

I want to know who they are.

- Well, I-- I--

- Mr. Spivey, there's a
man here looking for you.

- Oh.

- He says it's important.

- Well, let's hold
this little drama

right where it is, gentlemen.

I'll be right back.

- Yes?

You're looking for me?

I'm Mr. Spivey.

- Oh, yes, Mr. Spivey, my
name's Henry Mitchell.

- What?

- Dennis Mitchell's dad.

I believe there's been a
little misunderstanding

about that fine--

- A little misunderstanding?

Well, that is the prize
understatement of the season.

Come right in, sir,
join our family group.

- What are you doing here, Finch?

- Oh, I-- I didn't know
there was anyone else here.

I-- I came to see my
boy, Dennis Mitchell.

There you are, son.

- Uh, I'd better
get back to work.

- Your name is Finch?

- Hm?

No, it's uh, it's a nickname.

My name's really
Mitchell, Henry Mitchell.

MR. SPIVEY (OFFSCREEN):
Sit down, all of you.

Now I don't know what this
farce is all about, gentlemen,

but we're going to
find out, aren't we?

Now each of you claims
to be Mr. Henry Mitchell.

Now will the real Henry
Mitchell please stand up?

- The real Henry Mitchell
can't stand up, Mr. Spivey.

My dad's out of town.

- Well, at least there's
one honest person here.

- They're all honest, Mr. Spivey.

Honest they are.

I don't know why they all
said that they were my dad.

- I-- I'll tell him, Dennis.

I'm John Wilson, a
neighbor of Dennis's.

You see, I bought the
house from my brother

and I've lived
there for some time,

and well, I just know
that Dennis couldn't

have done what
you accuse him of.

- Just how do you
know, Mr. Wilson?

- I have his word, for one thing.

- That's all anybody
needs from Dennis.

That boy never tells
a lie about anything.

Oh, I-- I'm Quigley,
Quigley's Market.

- I'm Lawrence
Finch, the druggist.

Now Dennis is a good boy.

What's more, he's the
most honest boy in school.

- If his father were here, we
wouldn't have jumped in like

this, but his dad's
out of town, and--

- Honey, I'm home.

- Well, hello, dear, I didn't
expect you till dinnertime.

- Hi, baby.
- How'd things go?

- Oh, fine, I got
through early, and it's

only an hour's drive home.

Where's Dennis?

- Well, he isn't home
from school yet.

I suppose he's still practicing
for the big game tomorrow.

- I think I'll go pick
him up while I've

still got the car out.

- Good, maybe you'll get a chance
to meet his new principal.

- Yeah, that shouldn't
do Dennis any harm,

to have his father make
friends with the head man.

- So you see, Mr. Spivey, we just
had to do something for Dennis.

But I suppose we've made it
worse for him with all this.

- That's OK, Mr. Wilson.

I don't even mind
being sorry 500 times

when I've got such good
friends like you all are.

- Gentlemen, I-- well, I'm
beginning to think maybe

I have misjudged Dennis.

- Everybody believes me
but you, Mr. Spivey.

- Well, it does seem that any boy
for whom three grown men will

go through all this lunacy
must be all they say he is.

- Well, of course he is.

- That's what I've been saying.

- Then you will put
him back on the team?

- Dennis, you're back on the
baseball team as of right now.

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN): Wow!
- Oh, that's wonderful.

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN): Oh, boy,
that's great, Mr. Spivey!

I'll pitch my arm off tomorrow.

You just watch me.

- Well, I'll find out who
did draw this picture,

and when I do,
they'll hear from me.

- Well, they should.
- I should think so.

- Well, I think I'd better
get back to the store.

- Yeah, I guess I'd
better get back

before the potatoes arrive.

- I'll run along, too.

Come on, Dennis.

I'm very glad everything turned
out all right, Mr. Spivey.

- Well, so am I, Mr. Wilson.

And Dennis, I'll be there
tomorrow rooting for you.

- That's great, Mr. Spivey.

- Come along.

Come along.

- Oh, I almost forgot-- I've
got to go pick up my things.

They're in my locker.

- Lead the way.

[knock]

- Excuse me, Mr. Spivey?

- Yes?

- Welcome to our
school, Mr. Spivey.

My name is Henry Mitchell.

My son Dennis is
one of your pupils.

- Oh, no, not another one!

- No?

- Well, what kind of business
did you leave to come over here,

sir?

A barber shop, maybe?

A filling station?

- No, I--

- Well, Mr. Henry
Mitchell IV, we've

had our little joke for
this afternoon, haven't we?

As a matter of fact, it has
taken up half my afternoon,

so if you will excuse
me, sir, please,

I'd like to get back to work.

Thank you.

- Hey, there's Dad.

Hi, Dad.

- Well, hi, son.

- Did you meet Mr. Spivey?

- Well, I think so.

I'm not sure.

He was so confused.

- What happened?

- Well, I don't
know what happened.

I just walked in and said, Mr.
Spivey, I'm Henry Mitchell.

Next thing I knew,
I was out the door.

- You, uh, just walked in and
said, I'm Henry Mitchell?

- Well, sure.

I am, you know.

- You're the fourth one today.
- What?

- Jeepers, it was funny.

We've been reading in American
History about our forefathers,

and today I really
have four fathers.

- We'll tell you.

We'll tell you.

[laughter]

[theme music]

ANNOUNCER: This has been a
Screen Gems film production.