All language subtitles for Dennis.the.Menace.1959.S03E33.John.Wilsons.Cushion.1080p.PCOK.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-Dooky_track1_[eng]

- The train got in
half an hour ago.

George's brother
should be here by now.

I hope he didn't have
trouble finding a cab.

- Oh, traffic's pretty
heavy downtown.

- I sure will be glad to meet
good old Mr. Wilson's brother

because I've never met
a real writer before.

- Say, he's a fine writer.

We read all those
articles you sent over.

- We liked them.

- Good.

- I'm so glad you'll
have someone staying

with you while
Mr. Wilson's away.

- So am I Alice.

John was coming
out this way anyway

on an assignment so
it'll work out just fine.

- And don't you
worry Mrs. Wilson.

I'll help you look after him.

Anything I can do to-- hey!

Here comes a cab now!

- Martha!

Oh, you look wonderful!

- So do you.

It's so nice to see you.

- Good to see you.

- These are our friends,
Alice and Henry Mitchell.

- How do you do Mr. Wilson.
- How do you do.

How do you do.

Glad to know you.

And this must be Dennis.

How are you young man?

- Hi Mr. Wilson.

I sure am glad to meet ya,
because me and your brother

are best friends.

- I know you are.

He's written me all
about you, often.

- He has?

- Oh yes.

Yes he says you're a great
help to him at all times.

- I sure am.

And I'm going to help you too.

[theme music]

- There.

I thought they'd brighten
things up while you work.

- Thank you, Martha.

Of course I'd rather
sit and visit with you

but this article's due
at the end of the week

and I have to get it
in the mail tomorrow.

- I understand, John.

What's the article about?

- Well, it's called "Observations
from a Parlor Car Window."

I intended to write
it on the train

but I got so busy
looking out the window

that I simply didn't do it.

- Well, I'll keep the
house quiet and see

that nobody bothers you.

- Oh no, no, no, Martha,
don't you worry about me.

Nothing bothers me when I work.

I'm not one of those
temperamental writers

who has to have
everything just so.

I can write any place.

- Well that's good.

This is just fine.

Everything's set up just
the way I had it at home.

It all seems familiar to me.

- Well I suppose
that is important.

- I'll knock this out in no time.

Now.

[typing]

No, no.

Oh, come on brain,
wake up, wake up.

[typing]

- Well how's it going?

- Straight into the wastebasket.

- Oh dear.

- Hi Mrs. Wilson!

Hi Mr. Wilson!

- Hello Dennis.

- Hi Dennis.

- What are you writing?

Something on your typewriter?

- Well I'm trying
to Dennis, but I

don't seem to be
having any luck.

- Jeepers, I know how
that is, all right.

Whenever I get a composition
to write for homework

I have a heck of a
time getting started.

- I suppose that happens to
all writers sometimes dear.

- What can I do to
help you Mr. Wilson?

- Not a thing Dennis.

- Are you sure?

- Yes I'm sure.

I know what the
trouble is Martha.

- You do?

Good, what is it?

- Well I've been fighting against
mentioning it all morning

because it-- well
it sounds so silly.

- Doesn't sound silly to me.

What is it?

- My cushion.

- Your cushion?

- I always take my old chair
cushion with me wherever I go

but this time I
forgot to pack it.

I've been sitting
on it for 20 years

and I just can't
work without it.

- Well why didn't you say so?

That's no problem.

The house is full of cushions.

- Oh well I tried this one.

It's too thick.

- Well just relax.

I'll round up every
cushion in the house

and you can have your pick.

- And don't you worry.

I'll get some from
our house too.

I've got a dandy one that
I always put in my pants

when it looks like I'm
going to get a spanking.

- Too thick.

No, too thin.

Too hard.

Oh I hate to be
picky about this.

Don't think I'm
eccentric, please.

- Oh we don't think
that at all Mr. Wilson.

- Of course not.

- I don't even know
what it means.

- It's no use Martha.

None of these even look
like my old cushion.

- I'm so sorry we couldn't help.

- What does your cushion
look like, Mr. Wilson?

- Oh, it's just an old
faded blue corduroy thing,

stuffed with goose feathers.

It just happens to fit me.

It makes me feel comfortable.

- I know how you feel.

I used to have a
beat-up old teddy bear.

And if he wasn't in bed with
me at night, I couldn't sleep.

- Mm hm.

- That's before I
grew up, of course.

I don't have that kind
of silly stuff anymore.

- Well, perhaps I
haven't grown up Dennis.

- Dennis, we'd better get on
home and let Mr. Wilson think.

- Thank you, Mrs. Mitchell.

- Thanks for coming, Alice.

- You go ahead mom.

I'll stay here and help
Mr. Wilson for a while.

- Dennis, we are
both going home now.

- OK.

Just let me give him
my ballpoint pen.

If you can't write
with a typewriter maybe

you can write with this.

Here, I'll show ya.

Now you try.
[crash]

- Oh, here they are Martha.

- I'll hang them out to dry.

I can press them later.

Thank you.

Oh, I've got to get that
article written some way.

- You will.

You'll get it finished on
time and it'll be wonderful.

- Do you really think so?

- Of course.

Now forget about that cushion.

Relax your mind and go
in there and get to work.

- By thunder, I will.

This silly business about a
faded cushion is ridiculous.

I'm not a child Martha.

I am a writer.

And what does a writer do?

He writes.

- That's the way to talk.

- Observations from--
[typing]--a parlor--

[doorbell]

- If that's Dennis Mitchell
again I'll-- come in.

[typing]

- Oh!

How wonderful, the
author at work.

- Ah, ah, ah, who?

- Oh what a splendid
moment to catch you.

Right in the throws
of literary creation.

Oh this is fascinating.

- But-- but, madam I-- I--

- I'm sorry.

I haven't introduced myself.

I am Isabel Tolliver, president
of the lady's literary circle.

And a dear friend of Martha's.

- Oh, oh, well she's outside.

I'll call--

- Oh, no, no-- don't bother.

You're the one I came
to see, Mr. Wilson.

It isn't everyday I get to meet
an important literary figure.

- Oh, well.

I wouldn't call myself that.

I just write an
occasional article

for the National Journal.

- Oh, but such
fascinating articles.

The one last month, where the
Vikings discovered America

before Columbus-- well, it
was just simply marvelous.

- Well, that was rather
good, I thought.

- So erudite.

So-- so literary.

And I am here to invite you
to lecture before our club

on the Vikings next Friday.

You will come, of course.

- Well I'm very
busy Mrs. Tolliver.

I have a deadline.

- We won't take no for
an answer, Mr. Wilson.

Oh, I can just see how
you'll bring those old Norse

heroes back to life for us.

- Well I have
researched the subject

pretty thoroughly but-- but--

- Oh I knew you'd agree to it.

I can't wait to tell the girls.

I'll pick you up myself.

Friday afternoon at one.

- Yeah uh, well, I'll be ready.

- Oh this will be our
most thrilling afternoon.

There'll be tea and
cookies, of course.

- Of course.

One more thing Mrs. Tolliver.

How did you know I was here?

I only arrived yesterday.

- Dear little Dennis
Mitchell told me.

- Oh, what a helpful little boy.

- And I got a great
idea Tommy, that'll

be the swellest surprise
Mr. Wilson ever had.

- Yeah?

What is it?

- I'll make him a cushion,
just like his old one

that he can't write with
without sitting on it.

- How are you going to
make him a cushion?

- Oh, it's easy.

He said it was
faded blue corduroy,

and dad's got a pair of old
corduroy pants just the color.

I'm going in right now and
see if I can have them.

- What's the matter?

- I just thought of something.

I'll have to get Mr. Wilson's
measurements first-- you know,

so the cushion will fit him.

- That won't be easy if you're
going to keep it a secret.

- We'll figure out some way.

- Hey, I know.

I'll run upstairs and
get mom's tape measure.

And then we'll go
next door real sly

and sneak the size
of Mr. Wilson's seat.

- Now on top of everything else
I have a confounded lecture

to worry about with a room
full of gushing women and tea

and cookies.

Ew!

- You should have just said no.

- Well, if she hadn't been a
friend of yours I would have.

- A friend of mine?

Isabel Tolliver?

- Well that's what she said.

- Oh, she's no friend of mine.

I don't like her very much.

You don't have to
go on my account.

- Oh, fine.

- Why don't you just
call up and cancel it?

- Oh no, I did promise.

I gave her my word.

I don't know.

I guess I'm just stuck.

- Yes, a promise is a promise.

- What annoys me even
more-- I won't get any fee.

- Oh?

- No, for a lecture I
usually get 100 dollars.

- What was it you said people
get 100 dollars for Mr. Wilson?

- For lecturing.

- You mean 100 dollars
just for talking?

Boy, I could get rich that way.

- Yes, I've noticed the tendency.

- I'm going to start
our lunch, John.

Now boys, don't
disturb Mr. Wilson.

He's trying to think.

- We won't, Mrs. Wilson.

OK Tommy.

You know what to do.

Get him to bend over.

- Mr. Wilson.

- Hm?

- There's a penny on the ground.

Did you drop it?

- I don't think so.

- Maybe I did.

- Well, why don't you pick it up?

- Might not be mine.

Mom says I oughtn't pick
up things that aren't mine.

- Oh great Caesar.

Is it yours?

- It sure looks
like the one I had.

- Take it with my blessing.

And thank you for
not disturbing me.

- We got him.

- Yeah!

Boy, I'll need plenty of cloth.

Boy, mom and dad
sure looked confused

when I ripped his
old trousers up.

- Parents get
confused awful easy.

- Yeah.

Boy I hope Mr. Quigley's
got some goose feathers

at the market so I can start
making Mr. Wilson's cushion.

- Why does Mr. Wilson have
to have goose feathers?

- I don't know.

Maybe they're the softest kind.

- Maybe.
I never felt a goose before.

I never felt a goose before.
- Me neither.

But if that's what Mr. Wilson
wants, I've got to get them.

- Warm enough for
you, Mrs. Nolan?

- I should say it is.

It's very pleasant
in here, though.

- Oh, thank you.

I try to keep it comfortable
for my customers.

- Hi, Mr. Quigley!

Do you have any goose
feathers I can have?

- Please, Dennis.

Don't you see I'm
waiting on a customer?

- Oh, excuse me.

There you are, Mrs. Nolan.

Now what was it Dennis?

Feathers?
- Yeah!

I need some to--

- I know.

You want to put
them in your hair

and pretend to be
an Indian chief.

I've got a whole bag of them
out there the storeroom.

Go ahead and help yourself.

- Jeepers, thanks, Mr. Quigley.

Come on, Tommy.

- Mr. Quigley?

- That's right.

I don't believe
I've met you before.

Are you new in town?

- I'm John Wilson.

I'm staying at my
brother's house.

- Oh yeah, that's right.

Mrs. Wilson told me about you.

You're some kind of a
writer or something.

- That's right.

- You don't look much like one.

- How is a writer
supposed to look?

- Well, from all
I've heard, they're

all sort of on the
screwball side.

- Well that may apply to
some writers Mr. Quigley,

but not to me.

I just an ordinary, average
man with no peculiarities

whatsoever.

- Well, I'm glad to hear it.
Hey, what can I do for you?

- Do you have any
concentrated cucumber juice?

- Concentrated cucumber juice.

- I find when it's
mixed with skimmed milk

it tends to relax me.

- I'm glad to meet an
ordinary, average writer.

- Do you have it or don't you?

- I don't.

My juices are over there.

Maybe you can find
something you can use.

- Thank you.

- Oh, by the way--
while you're there,

take a look at my soup counter.

A salesman loaded me
up with a dozen cans

of ordinary, average
kangaroo tail soup.

- Are these the feathers
we can have, Mr. Quigley?

- Oh good grief, Dennis.

Did you have to bring
the whole bag out here?

I thought you only
wanted a handful.

- No, I need more than that.

- Well, all right but don't
take the sack away with you.

Here, put what you
need in this box.

And put it over there.

Get it away from the counter.

- OK Mr. Quigley.

Come on Tommy, give me a hand.

- Oh, hello their boys.

- Oh, hi Mr. Wilson.

- What are you
trying to do there?

- Oh, just emptying some
stuff into this box.

- Oh you better let
me give you a hand.

That bag's too big
for you to handle.

- Oh no Mr. Wilson.

We can handle it.
- Come along now, fellas.

You let me do--
- Please, Mr. Wilson.

- I'll do it for you.

There, just leave it to me.

- Boy, look at him go.

- Yeah!

- What in the world?

Right in front of the fan.

What's the big idea?

You think you're a
school girl having

a pillow fight or something?

- Well, I'm-- I'm sorry, I didn't
know what was in the sack.

- I might expect that from a boy
like Dennis, but a man your age

should know better.

- Well, I said I'm sorry.

- Well, stop being sorry and
start picking up the feathers.

- We'll help you Mr. Wilson.

- Just an ordinary,
average writer.

- My goodness, Dennis.

You're a real traffic hazard.

- Hi, Margaret.

I was thinking so hard
about goose feathers,

I didn't even see ya.

- Goose feathers?

- Yeah, I thought I had
some, but they turned out

to be plain old
chicken feathers.

Nobody's got goose feathers.

- My mother has.

- She has?

Real ones?

- Of course they're real.

They're in a pillow my
grandmother gave us.

- Oh boy!

Would you let me have them?
'Cause I sure need them.

- Well, I suppose I could.

We don't use it anymore.

- Jeepers, that's swell.

- If--

- I might have known
there'd be an if.

- You can have the feathers
if you come and play house

with me.

And be a father to our
darling little Gwendolyn.

- Oh no.

You can keep the feathers.

I'm not going to be the
father of that dumb old doll.

Not again, never.

- (SINGING) Rock-a-bye
Gwendolyn in the tree top.

When the wind blows,
the cradle will rock.

- You're such a
good father Dennis.

- Well, I'm an
awful tired father.

I've been messing around with
Gwendolyn for a whole hour.

Can I have the feathers now?

- Well, all right.

- Great!

- If!

- I knew it.

- You can have the feathers
if you'll do one more thing.

Gwendolyn needs changing.

- Jeepers.

- You do that, and I'll
get the feathers for you.

- Boy, the things I go
through to help a friend.

[sigh]

- May I interrupt a minute, John?

- Interrupt what?

There's nothing going on here.

- I'm sure you'll get the
article written in time.

- It's not just the
article, Martha.

While you were visiting
down the street,

that Tolliver woman
barged in here again.

- What did she want?

- She brought me this.

- My goodness!

What is it?

- A Viking helmet.

She insists that I wear
it during the lecture.

She says it will
create the proper mood.

I ask you.

- Well it does make you
look very distinguished.

- I look like a bull
with a mustache.

- I still think you ought
to call off the lecture.

- Oh no.

As a man of my
word, I'm obligated.

- Well, I have to go along.

Good luck John.

- Hi Mr. Wilson!

- Oh, hi Dennis.

- Guess what I got in this bag.

- An atom bomb.

- Heck, you're not even warm.

It's something for you.
It's--

[doorbell]

- Pardon me.

- It's me again Mr. Wilson.

May I come in?

- You are.

Please do.

- Oh, I know it's
very naughty of me

to keep interrupting
you like these.

I know how you literary
men like to woo the muse.

- Oh yes, we're great wooers.

- Well I have a wonderful
idea for the lecture.

And I wanted-- oh, hello Dennis.

- Hi Mrs. Tolliver.

- So I simply had
to share with you.

- Share away.

- Well, I feel that
appropriate music

would add to the occasion.

So I am going to sing
the song of the Valkyrie.

They were the
warrior maidens who

carried the Viking
heroes off to paradise.

- You are going to sing?
- Yes.

Oh, if I hadn't married, I could
have had a career in opera.

In fact, my husband often says,
you shouldn't have married.

Oh, now listen.

[singing]

- Is this to take place
before or after the lecture?

- During.

- While you're telling the
exploits of the Vikings,

I shall perform
in the background.

Oh, it should cause
a lot of comment.

- I can hear it now.

- Our club will never
forget this lecture.

Aren't you excited?

- Oh, I'm all atwitter.

- I'd be excited
too if I was going

to get $100 like Mr.
Wilson's going to get.

- $100?
- Yeah.

He says that's what he always
gets when he gives lectures.

Didn't you, Mr. Wilson?

- Well, yeah-- I--
I-- yes, Dennis.

Oh, thank you for reminding me.

- Why, I never
dreamed you expected

to be paid, Mr. Wilson.

Why, our club only has
$6.89 in the treasury.

- How regrettable.

- Oh, couldn't you speak
this once without a fee?

We're so literary.

- Oh, I'm sure you
are, Mrs. Tolliver.

However, we lecturers have a
very strong rule about this.

If I didn't charge you,
I would be drummed out

of the lecturers' union.

- Well, I'm-- I'm
afraid we'll just

have to cancel the whole thing.

- Oh, that's too bad.

May I show you to the door?

I'm sorry that I've robbed
you of the opportunity

to render the song
of the Valkyrie.

- But you haven't!

We've lost you, but I'll
make it up to the girls.

I shall sing the
whole aria for them.

[singing]

- Goodbye, Mr. Wilson.

- Goodbye, warrior maiden.

Oh, Dennis, I'm very
grateful to you.

Though I don't expect
you to understand why.

- I bet I do.

You really didn't want to talk
to those ladies after all,

did ya?

- Oh my, you are an
intelligent lad.

- Why, I sure wish you'd
tell my teacher that.

- No, it's such a
relief to get out

of the clutches of that woman.

Now if I could only
start that article.

- That's what I came over about.

This is for you.

- What in the world is this?

- It's a cushion, just like
your favorite one-- same color,

and it's full of goose feathers.

I made it for ya.

- Well, that was a
very kind thought.

- Sit on it Mr. Wilson, please.

- All right, Dennis.

- How does it feel?

OK?

- Feels pretty good.

George, it does feel good.

Feels like my old cushion.

- It does?

Now you can start
writing, can't ya?

- Well, I-- [clap] wait a minute.

I've got an idea.

I know how to
start that article.

Oh, this is wonderful.

- I knew that good old
cushion would do it.

- Aha, well.

[typing]

- Dennis, you could have played
cops and robbers today, gone

fishing, done a dozen things
little boys like to do.

Instead you made me a cushion.

Now, why did you go to all
that trouble just for me?

- Because I want us to
be friends, Mr. Wilson.

Do you want us to be?

- Yes, Dennis.

Having you as a friend
will make me very proud.

- Jeepers, that's swell.

Well, I'll go home
now and let you work.

- Oh no.

You stay right here.

You're my inspiration.

I need you.

- You do?

- Oh indeed I do.

Well, now let's see.

Aha!

Here we go.

[typing]

[theme music]

This has been a Screen Gems film
production from the Hollywood

studios of Columbia Pictures.