Original subtitles

[pensive music]

[music continues]

[sighs]

[waves crashing]

Miguel: The core drives the legs.

The legs drive the bike.

Keep the core tight, the shoulders still, okay?

[whirring]

- Ruth, how you doing? - Super good.

- Miguel: Yeah? - Yes.

Good, good, good. Okay.

Move dial, one more turn to the right.

Right, now turn... Bike, point...

Two to the right, let's go!

Nine, eight... Get to the top, come on!

Six, five, four...

Everything. Come on, Ruth! Put it in!

Come on. You're with me.

Come on! Make it, make it!

Five seconds, come on.

Over there. Yes. Everything you've got!

Come on, come on, come on, come on...

[laughing]

- Miguel: Four, three, two... - Oh, my God!

Miguel: Everything, everything, come on.

Okay, two to the left, rest, rest, rest, rest.

Woo!

There are times when I have,

when I have not come to this class

if I've read that there's a substitute on who's...

[laughs]

- There was one week... - No, not having him...

There was one week I came and it did say on the thing,

Miguel, and I got here and it was Iona, a woman.

- Oh, no! - That's no good to me.

I don't want that on a Sunday morning, babes.

- That's not what I'm looking... - Listen, I'm not being funny.

You were literally dangling your fanny in his face.

You were, you were.

- Well, you know... - I saw you.

Well, d'you know what? I was, to be honest with you,

I- I- I did think he was slightly flirting.

Paula: He was.

- I wasn't imagining that? - No, he was.

He kept saying push it, push it.

"Push it, Ruth, push it."

And you were doing your riding skills,

showing him your best riding skills.

Oh...

I would, I just want him to...

Maybe he could do, like, an entire class for us naked.

Just naked, just so we can just, just so we can observe.

Just observe, we don't need to touch.

I don't need to do anything.

I just wanna see, exactly, what's under there.

I just want to see what's under there.

[groans]

[door closes]

[telephone ringing in distance]

[indistinct chatter]

[zip whirring]

[camera clicking]

[engine turns off]

[car door closes]

[keys jangling]

Hi!

Freya?

[keys jangling]

Freya!

Ruth: Freya!

[camera clicks]

[knocking on door]

Freya.

You here, darl... Oh, you are here.

Hi, I was calling you and calling you.

Didn't you hear me, sweetheart?

Are you alright?

Bloody boiling in here.

Have you been out at all today?

Sweetheart?

[window blinds open]

Should go and get some fresh air.

You look nice, you going out?

What's the matter?

- Nothing. Ruth: Ah-hem.

Okay.

Um...

Alright, darling, well, I'm gonna put some, uh...

I'm just gonna make like a salad and chicken

or something like that, if you want anything?

Um...

Nothing else I can put in the wash?

Okay.

Well, I think you should just get dressed

and go out for a, just go for a walk

around the block, or something.

Put your phone down, and...

get some fresh air, or something.

Mum, can you just leave me alone?

Alright.

Um...

Just, um, let me know if you need anything, okay?

Okay.

[sighs]

[sniffs]

[cell phone chimes]

[cell phone chimes]

[sighs]

[door closes]

[footsteps approaching]

[door closes]

[cupboard door opens]

[plastic crinkling]

Ruth: Dinner will be soon, love.

[footsteps departing]

[slurping]

[door closes]

Ruth: Hi!

Hi, darling.

Hi, I'm doing great actually.

Yeah, awe, how lovely it is to hear from you.

How are you getting on?

Oh, no, ho, ho, ho! Oh, no!

Oh, my God, that's funny!

I was a flippin' student myself...

Part of the whole...

Part of this- part of the culture.

Um...

Billy on phone: Yeah, oh, mum,

I- I- I was really annoyed the other day.

I really wanted to take

a photo, or like a video for you.

But I mean, I was in the sea, so I kind of couldn't.

But I saw a pod of dolphins. How crazy is that?

Oh, my God! That's amazing!

Billy: I was gonna Facetime you

and show you, but obviously I was...

Ruth: Aw, aw, well, please do next time.

If ever that happens and you're not standing on a surf board.

Um...

Billy: Yeah, I'll- I'll try. Also...

I was thinking maybe I'd come up and, uh,

see you and, uh, Chippy at home before I go.

- I'd love that, darling. Billy: Uh, okay, I'll call you.

- That'd be amazing. Billy: Wait, how's, uh...

How's, uh, how's Chippy? Is she, is she around?

She... Hang on a sec.

Yeah, she's, she's fine.

She's just, um... Uh, Chippy's being Chippy.

Billy: So she's, I'm guessing she's

still pretending to hate you.

No, I think she's actually hating me to be honest.

Billy: No, mum, that's not Chippy. She doesn't.

She might seem like she does, but it's not, you know...

- Chippy never... - No, I know...

Billy: Chippy's Chippy, Chippy does these things.

I know. To be honest with you, I'd really like it

if you would phone her, darling.

And ask her, genuinely, if she's alright.

Because I think there could be truly something...

Billy: Have you asked her if she's alright?

Ruth: No, I can't, I can't.

- I just, everything I say... Billy: You haven't...

It seems to quite piss her off.

And, um...

Billy: Right, okay.

It's, you know, it's a bit... [clears throat]

It's a bit tricky.

Billy: Is she eating well, or is- is...

Ruth: Oh, I don't know. That's the whole thing.

There's a whole Ritz cracker ritual I've noticed.

But I'm sure it's just a phase and everything,

but I just, I just don't want her to get

stuck in a rut about whatever it is.

So I wonder if you could just ring her and just...

Billy: Yeah, I'll try and give Chippy a call.

Anyway, uh, mum, I've gotta, I've gotta go, um...

Ruth: Alright, sweetheart. Okay, well, I love you so much.

And thank you for ringing.

And, uh, oh, okay, oops, I gotta go.

Okay, love you, baby.

[whispers] He's gonna give you a ring.

Billy: Okay, love you, mum.

Okay. Freya's here, she just popped in.

Just say hi, hi, hi.

Billy: Hi, Chip, hiya.

He's, he's gonna give you a buzz.

Alright, darling, love you.

Okay, love you, darling, bye. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.

Oh, um...

D'you want some soup?

Oh, what's the matter?

Well, Billy's having an absolutely lovely time.

And he was asking after you.

Um, and...

All his flat mates are vegan,

which doesn't work very well for him.

Um...

And, um...

Yeah, he's really, really good, really good, really happy,

um...

He said, he saw some dolphins.

Oh, sweetheart, come on.

Please, this is so silly.

Is there anything I can...

Okay, no, don't.

I'm gonna give you a little bowl of this,

it's really nice and you should have some.

[mumbling]

[clanking]

[fire crackling]

Freya: Why are you standing under a tree secretly smoking?

I'm not actually secretly smoking,

I'm just not smoking in the house.

And it's sunny, so I'm standing in the shade.

No.

Freya: It's gross.

Thank you, thank you.

Freya: Welcome. It's stinks.

Yeah, alright, darling, okay.

I can do some things that I want to do

sometimes and it's okay.

It's okay, you don't need to turn that into

another reason to be pissed off with me.

No, I'm not, but by that same definition

am I not allowed to do my own thing as well?

Ruth: Yes, you can do whatever you want, sweetheart.

You, you are not judged, you are not criticized.

Freya: Well, I am though, am I not?

- You're not judged, babe. Freya: I am though.

- Just, I'm not... Freya: No, but I am judged.

No one...

Freya: No, I am judged,

because I just heard you on the phone to Billy,

talking about my strange little Ritz cracker ritual.

So beg my pardon

if I'm a little bit hurt...

and upset by the fact that you

just have been talking about me,

to my own brother.

That feels, that feels very... divisive and manipulative.

I'm sorry.

Freya: You should learn how to really whisper.

Or go to the end of the garden and have that conversation.

Alright, yep. No, you're right, you're right.

Ruth: You don't need to get upset.

You don't need to get upset.

I was talking to your brother

and I was sharing with him my concerns

about how you are, and I just thought

that maybe it would be more helpful

for him to speak to you.

Rather than me trying to speak to you

when you obviously, don't want to speak to me at the moment.

I am sorry if I got that wrong. I'm sorry if I misjudged it.

And I really am sorry that you overheard me

talking about the cracker thing,

because I didn't mean that to seem so...

I- I, it's not, it doesn't matter about the crackers.

You can, you know, make a bloody tower of the things.

I don't give a shit, sweetheart.

Freya: Oh, f... Don't act so fucking flippant about it.

Okay, I'm not being flip...

Oh, fucking hell.

[water running]

[mellow music]

[sighing]

Oh...

Oh, for fuck's sake.

[water running]

[music continues]

[sighs]

[music continues]

Stop.

Stop.

Stop it, darling. Stop.

Come on, that's enough.

Stop.

Sweetheart.

Stop.

- I have to brush my teeth. - Stop.

Stop.

I have to brush my teeth, mum.

Turn the tap off.

Ruth: Come on.

Freya: I still have to do my teeth, mum.

Ruth: You don't have to brush your teeth, come on.

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.

Shh.

[kissing]

It's alright.

I'm sorry.

[sighs]

I think you just need now,

just have a lovely night's sleep, okay?

Good night's sleep. I'm sure you're feeling a bit...

[sighs]

Just a bit overwhelmed and maybe a bit premenstrual.

You know how we get, us girls, don't we?

Yeah, alright, come on.

Sort yourself out.

Blow your nose.

Blow your nosey. Blow your nosey.

Freya: Mum...

[sniffs]

[door closes]

[inhales]

[sighs]

[sniffles]

[door opens]

[sighs]

[knocking on door]

Darling...

It's time to wake up.

[knocking on door]

Freya...

Come on.

[sighs]

[clattering]

[clinking]

Come on, darling, you're gonna be late.

Are you up?

Ruth: Sweetheart?

It's nearly half past, darling.

[sighs]

[cutlery clanking]

[door opens]

Hi, you're gonna be late, love.

[rattling]

D'you want some eggs?

I heard your phone going

until the early hours of the morning, darling.

It's not the best idea,

beginning of a school week, sweetheart.

Who on earth is possible messaging you

at that time of night anyway?

Look, I'll give you a lift in

and then you shouldn't be too late.

Come on, sit down, darling, have some egg.

I'll just grab some plates.

Mind out.

I'm not sure if you should be wearing

quite such a revealing skirt to school.

Freya: I'm not sure you should be wearing such a horrible

wine colored dress with such a low neckline.

Why have you got the pink dots on your eyes?

Freya: Because it's part of the style that I try out on my face.

Why have you got those earrings in?

Why do you have that mascara on?

Why do you have no contour on?

Why are you standing like that?

Freya: Don't criticize me for wearing a skirt.

I'm not criticizing you,

I wasn't criticizing you, actually.

- You were. Yes, you were. - I wasn't, darling.

- I wasn't criticizing you. - Okay.

Well, if you weren't, then what were you doing then?

[clattering]

I don't remember dressing as a slut when I went to school.

[shouting] Don't call me a slut!

Ruth: Alright.

- Freya: I'm 17. - I'm sorry.

I'm allowed to experiment with whatever...

I don't, I'm sorry. I'm so... I don't, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that I'm not like Billy.

And I'm not perfect. And...

- Please stop! Freya: Stop doing what?

Just stop, I'm just trying to talk to you...

You are driving me to do this.

Ruth: What am I fucking doing?

Asking me endless fucking questions.

What am I doing? I'm not bloody doing anything.

- Freya: You are though. - I'm not.

Freya: Believe it or not, you are.

You shout slut, it's a bit of a sluttish outfit.

Oh, it's a bit of a sluttish...

Let's not keep going on about that.

Freya: Fucking bitch! Fuck off!

Freya. Come back here right now.

[door slamming]

Freya.

Stop it.

Ruth: Sweetheart.

You can see your knickers.

Hi, Janice.

I'm not a fucking slut, I'm not a fucking slut.

[sniffs]

[keys jangling]

[door closes]

[window whirring]

I'm really, really sorry,

okay?

Freya, can you look at me please, darling?

I am really sorry.

I shouldn't have said any of what I said. I'm so sorry.

[sighs]

Look,

you also can't talk to me like that, you know?

I am your mum, darling, and I do care about you

and I know I'm getting some things wrong.

I don't know why. I don't know what it is

that I've done to upset you, or offend you, or something.

Don't know what it is that I've done to make you

hate me so much.

But I care about you deeply.

And I want to make sure that you're alright.

And I am really sorry.

You know, we were both a little bit in the wrong there.

You know, both of us a bit below the belt.

Perhaps shouldn't have said

those kinds of things to each other that way.

But can we please just forget it,

forget it, forget it?

Please, can we, sweetheart?

Come on, get in the car.

Get in the car and I'll- I'll drive you to school, yeah?

Please, darling. Come on now.

Stop all this.

Freya, don't walk away, please.

Freya darling, Frey... Freya, Freya, don't walk off!

Don't walk off.

Don't walk off.

Freya.

Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you.

That is incredibly annoying. I'm just trying to talk to you.

Please, will you get in the car?

[door closes]

Fuck!

I just want you to be...

happy.

I just want to smash your phone into a thousand pieces

and shit on it and flush it down the fucking loo.

[line ringing]

Billy on phone: Alright, mum.

Hi, darling. Hi, are you okay?

Billy: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I'm just working.

- Um, are you... Billy: Are you alright?

Yes, I'm fi... Actually, no, I'm not alright and I'm not, um,

I'm not alright. I'm really sorry, I just...

Ahem, have you got a minute to chat?

Billy: Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, yeah.

Your sister called me a bitch. She left the house.

Billy: She called you a bitch?

Yes. She left the house, she slammed the door

I just went to find her, found her,

she wouldn't even respond to me.

Didn't even talk to me.

And, um...

I'm just trying my best. I'm trying my best.

I'm trying my fucking best

and I just don't know what else to do.

I'm so sorry...

Billy: It's okay.

Don't cry, mum.

You're gonna make me cry if you start crying.

I don't like it when you cry, come on. It's okay.

Yeah.

Billy: Things like this happen.

Yeah.

[sighs]

[indistinct chatter]

Hi, darling, it's mum.

Um...

I hope you're having a lovely day.

Let's have a chat, and, uh, just clear the air.

Would be lovely to see how your day's going.

Um, I'm gonna be on my lunch break

in about an hour and a half

so maybe you might have a minute

then to give me a ring?

Um...

Okay, love you. Bye.

[indistinct chatter]

Hi, darling, it's just mum, uh,

calling to see if you're having a nice day.

Um...

And, yeah, that's it really.

Just let me know what time you'll be back

and...

Uh, yeah, I love you very much.

Okay, speak to you later.

Love you.

Bye.

[sighs]

[sighs]

[indistinct chatter]

[line ringing]

Hi.

Freya on phone: Hi.

Oh, hi, darling, you're there. Are you alright?

[line disconnects]

[sighs]

[pensive music]

Hi, um...

I'm here to see Mr. Kingsley Pallant.

Receptionist: Okay. If you just go straight up

the, uh, stairs in front of you,

on the first floor.

It's just to the left, uh, room 140.

Okay, thanks.

[music continues]

- Hi. Hello. Simon: Hello, Ruth, hi.

Come in. Come in

- Thanks. Simon, hi. - I'm Simon.

Hi, we- we met briefly at a parent's evening, um...

- Oh, that's right, yes, we did. - Last October.

That's right.

- Um... - Okay.

[music continues]

[sighs]

Simon: We're just doing her grade reviews at the moment

and it's not good. It's not, not like last terms.

We've seen quite a huge decline and even some of her

assignments not being completed or- or handed in.

[sighs] Okay.

Simon: I am really sorry to just

spring this on you, but I...

I felt, she just seems very different.

What worries me is that there seems to be,

is so marked a contrast

from how she was when she first came here.

And I've tried to talk to her about it,

um, in tutor time, um...

And what- what does she say about that then?

She's- she's- she's not guarded, she just says,

"I'm fine, there's, there's nothing,

there's nothing to worry about."

[camera clicks]

There's obviously something weighing on her

that she needs help and support with.

Now I- I completely accept

that young people have their rebellions,

they- they like to try different personas,

all that kind of stuff.

But I- I would really think,

I really think, it would be worth her while

if she saw a counselor,

and I...

No, no, we don't. That's... I don't...

She doesn't need to see...

I- I... It's not that, it's not that bad.

[music continues]

[sighs]

Simon: How are you, how are you getting on with her at home?

[clears throat] Fine.

I mean fine, you know?

Um...

yeah.

Simon: So nothing- nothing has happened between

you two that's...

Mnh-mnh. No.

No, not that I can...

Not that I can think of.

[music continues]

Yeah, I'll mention, I'll mention it

and then I'll- I'll- I'll ring...

Simon: I know this sounds really personal and I do

apologize for asking it, but are you alright?

- Yeah. - Ruth?

I'm very, I'm fine, thank you. I- I'm gonna go.

I've got to do dinner and stuff, thank you.

I really appreciate your time. I'm very grateful.

Well, we're here and if you could have that conversation

with her about seeing a counselor that would be...

I will do my best.

I will do my best.

[cell phone chimes]

[cell phone chimes]

Freya, come downstairs, please.

[keys jangling]

[water trickling]

[footsteps approaching]

So, is there anything you want to...

tell me about how everything's going at the moment?

From your point of view.

Not really.

Ruth: Well, I think you need to have

a proper conversation with me

about how you're actually feeling at school.

Whether things are being handed in on time?

Because I have just had a meeting with...

Simon Kingsley Pallant.

Apparently, you're not being very truthful.

In fact, you're being a bit secretive

I think about school work all of a sudden.

And if you're struggling, sweetheart,

you need to tell me.

So that, I can't help you unless you tell me.

You care about doing well.

I don't really care right now.

I don't really want to be in school anymore.

I remember that feeling myself.

Freya: Yeah, but you went to school years ago, so...

Ruth: We're not talking about me, please.

Okay, we're not talking about me.

Don't get all uppity at me.

I am just... You asked me to talk and I'm trying to talk.

Okay. I want to try and help.

What's going on, darling, please? Come on.

I just don't really want to be...

doing school stuff.

Ruth: Okay, let's move on from that.

You're doing school stuff, it's something you have to do.

What's- what's going on?

I don't know what's going on.

- Well, what's wrong with you? - I don't know what's wrong.

There's something that's wrong.

[sighs]

Look, that Simon guy

thinks that you need to see a school counselor.

That feels a bit embarrassing to me.

I'm sorry, I shouldn't actually be saying

these things out loud, I shouldn't. You're right.

Freya: So it's embarra... It's embarrassing

for you that I clearly am not

very engaged, apparently.

And don't really like the schoolwork at the moment.

- No, that's not what I said. Freya: School is...

Don't twist what I said.

Freya: I'm not twisting what you said.

I didn't say that it's embarrassing

for me that you don't like school.

That is not what I said.

I said it feels a little bit embarrassing

that I am being told what's really

going on with you by a teacher,

who I barely fucking know.

And that- that teacher thinks you need to

go and see the bloody counselor.

Oh, fucking hell!

Freya: You can't get frustrated right now...

Okay, I, I'm frustrated with the situation,

not you, alright?

Oh, fuck this.

[sighs]

[clattering]

[sighs]

Freya: I hate this situation just as much as you do.

I really do, but I just don't know what to tell you.

Ruth: Come and sit down, sweetheart.

I don't really want to sit down.

I don't really want to sit down.

Ruth: Come and sit down at the table.

No, I don't really want to.

- Ruth: Sit down! - I'm...

Sit fucking down, right now!

I'm, no, I've had enough of this. Sit down, young lady.

All this fucking dramatic nonsense...

"I don't know what's wrong."

You do know what's wrong,

bloody well tell me, now.

I don't know what's wrong.

Ruth: I don't like being in the dark.

I don't like feeling powerless.

I don't like feeling like I'm doing the wrong thing.

And I don't like being told by a fucking

school teacher, who I barely bloody know

that my kid is going to school dressed like a slut

and that her grades are slipping...

You know, here's the thing,

I don't actually give a shit about whether

you get C's, D's, B's fucking A's whatever.

I actually don't care.

But what I do care

is that I know it matters to you.

It matters to you, and I care...

that you will end up feeling

bitterly disappointed in yourself.

Oh, my God.

[sniffles]

I don't need to be shouted at like that.

Ruth: No, you're absolutely right, you're absolutely right.

Freya: I don't know what is wrong

and I don't know what to tell you.

I can't give you any answers,

because I have no answers.

So don't yell at me.

Look, to me, it seems like you don't

like yourself very much at the moment.

Freya: I don't!

Okay. What, why? You are beautiful...

Freya: I just don't like myself.

I just don't feel

like I like myself right now.

You've got an incredible cracking figure.

You've got, you're so athletic.

- You've got incredible skin. Freya: Oh...

You're a vibrant, gorgeous, gorgeous girl.

What's happened?

Nothing. I don't know, I...

Oh, fuck me. Oh, my God.

I'm gonna go to bed.

See you tomorrow morning.

[sniffles]

[mellow music]

[shudders]

[sobbing]

[music continues]

[waves crashing]

[Ruth sighs]

Ruth: Hi.

Um...

Here you go.

Um...

Can I sit down?

Oh, thank you.

Um...

I think I need to tell you that I'm really struggling.

Darling, I'm finding this really, extremely hard.

[scoffs] I'm sorry to put that on you when I know

that you're going through a lot of stuff too.

But I'm finding this really difficult.

And I feel really lonely at times.

And that's not who I am either.

It's not what I'm used to.

I feel sad.

Don't always like myself either.

That happens to grown-ups as well.

And so, it's really hard for me...

to be experiencing this time with you

that is so upsetting.

[sighs]

It's occupying my mind all the, all the time.

I'm not really sleeping very well.

I'm not enjoying anything.

I don't look forward to anything.

I don't look forward to anything at all.

Nothing, nothing.

I just feel bad, all the time.

I feel bad, I feel guilty, I feel like I'm a nag.

I feel like I'm... not that fun mum that I used to be.

I feel like I'm... losing you.

And in the process of that, I'm losing something of myself.

It's really hard to let go of that.

I don't wanna let go of being a mum.

I don't want to have to do that.

And I don't think I should.

[sighs]

So that's where I'm at.

I feel very...

lost...

with where... I wanted to be,

or what I was expecting this year to be like.

It's not like that.

And I'm really scared, because I, I feel like I'm just

not... in touch with myself anymore.

And I don't know where that's gone.

[sniffles] I'm really frightened that I can't get it back.

[sobbing]

[sniffles]

[cell phone chimes]

[cell phone chimes]

[sobbing]

[cell phone chimes]

Freya, it's 1:30, darling.

Nearly, nearly 1:30 in the morning.

[knocking on door]

Sweetheart, I think you've left your phone on.

Ruth: Please go to sleep now.

[knocking on door]

It's a school night, darling, come on.

[cell phone chimes]

Come on, Freya.

Switch off now, darling, okay?

Right, 'night, love you, 'night, 'night.

[sobs]

[door closes]

[cell phone chimes]

[sighs]

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh...

Come on.

Come on, come on.

Switch that fucking thing off.

Come on, darling, we've really got to just...

Get on now, come on.

We've just gotta crack on with the day.

And just, uh...

Just, just move on.

Freya, please.

Freya?

Sweetheart, please.

Come on. I've got to go to work.

Freya, come on, please, come on.

Please don't make me leave you like this, darling.

Please...

Freya, you've got to get up and go in, darling.

Just do a half day, or something.

I'll come and pick you up at lunch.

I tell you what.

I'll set an alarm on your clock.

I'll set an alarm for 9:00,

and then you won't miss your second lesson, alright?

And I can always call the school

and just let them know that you're not feeling too well,

okay?

Come on, sweetheart, this isn't fair on me.

Oh, fuck...

[sighs]

Alright... your alarm's gonna go off at 9:00

and I'll call you when I get to work, okay?

Love you.

Okay.

[Ruth clears throat]

[inhales]

[line ringing]

[cell phone vibrating]

I just...

I just want to go back to how everything

was before... all this.

We'll be alright, we'll be alright,

we'll figure it out. It'll be okay, darling.

It's just a phase, it's just...

These things happen, don't they?

Anyway, look, I love you very much.

I really do. Please just call me,

no, pick up when I phone you.

[sighs]

Ruth on voicemail: We'll be alright, we'll be alright,

we'll figure it out. It'll be okay, darling.

It's just a phase, it's just...

These things happen, don't they?

Anyway, look, I love you very much.

I really do. Please just call me,

no, pick up when I phone you.

[sighs]

[car beeping]

Ahem.

[sighs]

[line ringing]

Automated message: Welcome to the O2...

[breathing heavily]

[keys clacking]

[pensive music]

Hayley: Ruth?

Ruth, you okay?

Oh, fuck off.

What's happened?

Hi, darling, can you just, please, can you ring me?

I just feel a bit worried about you

and I just really want to talk to you

and just make sure you're okay.

[music continues]

Can you phone me back?

- Sorry. - That's okay, what's happened?

- What is it? - I don't...

What is it?

What's happened?

[music continues]

Miguel: Fight everything this time.

Five, four, three, two, one.

Turn to the right. Let's go, let's go, let's go.

Get to the top of the hill.

Ruth, come on, push it.

Move your legs, move your legs.

Come on, everybody, four, three, two, one!

[music continues]

[keys jangle]

[music continues]

[knocking on door]

Darling?

[sighs]

Oh, sweetheart...

Have you been sleeping all day, darling?

Yeah?

You been sleeping all day?

Are you okay?

Are you alright?

Oh, beautiful girl.

Come on, it's ever so hot in here.

Have a bit of...

Blankets off you.

Come on, sweetheart. Get some air.

What you doing?

What have you got, are you hiding something?

What have you got?

What have you done?

What is it?

What is it?

What is it?

[both sobbing]

What, what is, what...

What have you done?

What is it?

Oh, my God.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

My baby, baby, baby.

[indistinct chatter]

Suzy: Freya Eldwick.

Sorry, I'm running late today.

Do come in.

Take a seat.

Ruth: Thank you.

So, I've not met you both before.

My name's Doctor Suzy.

And, um, how can I help you this afternoon?

Um, do you want to tell the doctor, darling,

or do you want me to tell her?

Freya: You tell her.

Suzy: Okay. Ruth: Um...

So Freya's hurt herself.

Suzy: Okay. It's okay.

And, um...

Suzy: When did this happen, Freya?

Freya: Today.

Suzy: Okay. How did you do it?.

Some nail scissors.

Okay, can I have a look, is that okay?

- Freya: Yeah. - Thank you.

Can I have a look underneath?

Okay, aw...

You managed to stop the bleeding okay?

Yeah.

Suzy: How do you feel showing that to me now?

Um, em- embarrassed.

Suzy: Okay.

Would you find it easier

if it was just you and me, Freya?

We can talk together

and maybe mum could wait in the waiting room.

Suzy: Yeah? Freya: Yes, please.

Suzy: Is that okay with you, mum?

Um...

Um...

Yeah.

Suzy: Okay.

I'll call you back in, I'll come and get you.

But what if I...

Don't I need to know what's happening?

Suzy: Well, Freya's of an age now

where it might be more comfortable to talk to me

on a one-to-one basis.

- So, my duty- - I'm her, I'm her mum, though.

Suzy: Sure. And I can see that you're upset,

but Freya can speak to me on her own.

Ruth: I'll wait out there. Suzy: Okay, thank you.

[door closes]

Suzy: Is that more comfortable, Freya?

Has mum been part of the problem?

What's been going on?

I just feel really...

uh, out of control.

Suzy: Okay. Okay.

Um... I don't know why...

I don't know why I cut myself and I'm really scared.

Suzy: Okay, how long has this been going on for?

Um, a while.

Okay.

Uh, one month, six months?

Has it been building up over the last couple of weeks?

What sort of, what's been the background?

Freya: It's been about, maybe a month.

Okay.

Freya: And I started to not be able to remember things.

Okay.

Freya: Which is weird

because I normally am really good.

Suzy: And have you been, do you go to college?

Are you, have you been going to college okay?

Yeah.

Suzy: Are you managing to concentrate on your lessons?

I, I mean, it...

I thought, I think that I am,

but then I can't remember.

I can't, I can't remember what we did.

Freya: Okay, and how much have you discussed this

with your mum?

[sighing]

Suzy: Hi, thanks for waiting.

Could you come down with me please?

- Thanks. - Yep.

Right, come on in and take a seat.

Um, I've had a good chat with Freya today

and, um, I'm beginning to understand what's going on.

And I think the safest thing to do

is refer her on to CAMS for some counselling.

I don't know what that is.

Okay, so, CAMS is

the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services.

It's a part of the NHS

that offers counselling services

for children and teenagers.

In the meantime,

Freya's got a sheet of counselling services

if she feels like she wants to contact them.

And, um, you and I will see each other regularly

until CAMS take on your care.

Mm.

Suzy: So obviously this has been a bit of a shock

for you as well.

Do you see anybody at the practice at all?

- Me? Suzy: Yes.

No, no.

Suzy: Do you feel that you need any help, or support?

No, no, no.

I mean, I'm a strong, normal person.

Um, so t- that's, well, that's, that's great,

isn't it, darling? Sounds good, doesn't it?

Suzy: If you need any support or any questions,

just contact me through the main switchboard

and we can have a conversation.

But obviously, I can't divulge anything

that we've discussed today with Freya.

Ruth: Alright, thank you.

- Thank you. Suzy: Bye-bye, Freya.

Bye.

Uh...

Would you like me to run you a bath,

or something, darling?

Maybe, ahem...

Maybe you should just go and have a little sleep.

Let me know if you need anything, okay?

[sighing]

[sighing]

[sighs]

[groans]

[pensive music]

[knocking on door]

- Oh, my God! - Mum!

Ruth: Oh my God!

Oh, my God! What are you doing here?

You didn't message, or anything?

You didn't message us, darling.

I know, I didn't think I...

- I didn't think I needed to. - How did you get from the...

Did you get, how did you get from the station?

I got a taxi from the station.

Oh, darling, I could have come and...

No, it was fine. I wanted to come and surprise you.

How you doing?

I could have come and picked you up.

- That's okay. - Oh, wow.

- You alright? - Yeah.

[sighs]

- You sure, you're alright? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right, I'm gonna make some toast.

- Okay. - I'm really hungry.

Um, yeah, come, let's go in.

God, bloody hell. What have you got in this bag?

- It weighs a ton. - Don't take my bag up.

Don't take my bag. I'll take, I'll take my bag up.

- To my room in a minute. - Alright, darling.

Let me put the, um, kettle on.

Billy: Is Freya in?

Um, Freya... um...

Billy: Yeah, is, is she... is she out?

No, she's here.

Billy: Okay.

Ruth: Um, darling...

What's happ... Mum, what's happened?

Freya's not very well, sweetheart.

She doesn't have like a cancer, or anything like that.

It's nothing like that.

Billy: Oh, thank God.

She's, um...

She's... She's very depressed at the moment.

And that means that she is

not behaving quite like herself at all.

And, um, she's, she's quite lost.

She's quite lost and, and...

She hurt herself with some scissors,

darling, and she's cut her arms.

And she, I'm sorry, sweetie,

I'm sorry, darling.

Come on.

Come on, angel. Look at me, look at me, darling.

Look at me, alright, listen.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, darling.

- I'm sorry, it's all my fault. Billy: No, it isn't, mum.

No, it is my fault. I've tried...

I've really tried to be good mummy.

Billy: You are.

Ruth: Just go and give her a nice cuddle.

- Okay. - Go and give her a nice cuddle.

- And just... - Okay.

Just tell her that you love her and that...

Can you tell her that...

Tell her that she's... a beautiful girl.

Tell her that she's beautiful

and tell her that you love her.

Tell her that everybody loves her.

And that she doesn't need to be anything that she isn't.

She can just be herself

and we'll just love her the same.

I'll tell her the right thing.

Ruth: Yeah, just be nice, kind, you.

Yeah.

Yeah, okay.

[knocking on door]

Freya...

Hey, Freya.

Hi...

[mellow music]

[Billy sighs]

Could you pass the, um, pepper?

Ruth: Mm.

And, um, and what about sports?

Have you been keeping up all of your...

Is there, do they have a gym, or...

They have, they do have a gym.

They do have a gym.

Which I've been to a couple of time, but...

I never go on my own, that's the thing.

I can't do solo gym.

- No. - It's just not my thing.

No.

Know what I mean?

Well done for coming downstairs, darling.

Would you like me to make you something different?

Why the fuck did you need to say that?

She was doing fine.

You didn't need to throw in,

"Shall I make you something different?

Well done for coming downstairs."

Oh...

Do you see how that would be annoying?

Yeah, I do, I do.

Billy: That's just not right.

When she's doing something well,

don't thank her for doing it well.

Yeah, I'll just go and see if she's alright.

[sighs] She was doing fine.

Yeah, okay.

Sorry about that, babe.

I didn't mean to upset you at all.

Look, I think you'll feel a bit better if you

eat something, just a little bit.

Just a little bit, yeah?

Alright.

Have a minute to yourself and then,

then come down, okay?

Alright.

[door shuts]

[sighs]

Oh, oh...

Fuck.

Fuck me.

[gasps]

Oh, my God...

What the fuck has she done?

Fuck.

[breathing heavily]

[toilet flushing]

Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy.

I've got her phone.

- What are you doing? - I've got her phone, don't...

No. Come on, stop it, stop it.

- Stop it, stop it, stop it. - Mum, you can't.

I would be angry if you took my phone.

But, Billy, look, this is...

Look at these terrible things

people are saying about her. What, what is this?

What the fuck is this?

What are these awful pictures?

So fucking...

Billy: Mum.

Sit down, sweetheart. Sit down.

- Where's my phone? Billy: Mum.

- Where's my phone? - Give her, her phone back.

- Where's my phone? Billy: Mum, just...

You have to give me back my phone.

- Billy: Freya, calm down. - No.

You have to give me back my phone.

Why did you take it? Why did you take it from the bathroom?

- Darling, listen to mummy. - It's mine!

Darling.

You need to listen to mummy now, okay?

I don't think that you should have that phone.

- No, no, no, no, no. - Sweetheart-

You have to give it back to me!

- It's mine! - Darling, enough, enough.

Billy: Mum, just give her, her phone back!

This is what's making you ill.

It's what's making you ill.

Me and Billy, me and Billy are gonna help you.

Aren't we, darling?

You have to give me back my phone.

It's my phone. It's my phone.

Alright, sweetheart. I'll give it back,

I'll give it back.

Give it back, it's my phone!

Billy, get the phone, get the phone!

Okay, sweetheart, stop, stop, stop!

Stop, stop, stop! Just stop! Stop!

Give it to mummy, give it to mummy,

give it to mummy

It's my phone. It's mine...

[pensive music]

[knocking on door]

- Ruth: Hi. - Good morning.

- Did you sleep alright? Billy: Yeah, I slept great.

I, I'm off, I have to go. I have to get the 8.30 train.

I'll take you, come on.

Billy: Oh, thanks, mum.

You just stay here, okay?

- Stay in bed. Freya: Mm-hmm.

[sighs]

Ruth: I'll just grab my shoes, darling.

I just wanted to say bye.

Oh, hey...

- I love you. Freya: I love you too.

- You gonna be alright? - Mm-hmm.

You're strong.

I'll, I'll call you, yeah?

Love you, Chip.

I'm only gonna be 15 minutes.

- Okay? - Yeah.

And I'll come straight back, alright?

Freya: Okay.

Why don't you go and get back into bed?

- Okay, darling? - Mm-hmm.

- Alright. Love you. - Okay.

[sighs]

[sighs]

Oh!

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

Thanks, mum.

[sighs]

It's gonna be good.

It's gonna be alright.

[water running]

[breathing heavily]

Billy: Don't worry about anything, okay?

You're a good mum.

Ruth: Thank you, darling.

I'll get my train.

- Alright. - Okay, love you.

I'll phone you later, okay?

Billy: Yeah, call me.

[car door closes]

I love you, darling.

Love you.

Ruth: Bye.

[water running]

[breathing heavily]

[turns off tap]

[pensive music]

[breathing heavily]

[breathing heavily]

[panting]

[gasping]

[breathing heavily]

[music continues]

[breathing heavily]

[grunts]

[breathing heavily]

Ruth: Darling, it's alright.

It's alright, sweetheart. Come on, come on.

It's alright, darling. Come on, come on.

Alright, come on, come on, come on,

sit down, sit down, sit down.

[Freya sobbing]

It's alright.

Oh, my God.

Oh, it's alright, sweetie. It's okay.

Come on, it's okay.

It's okay.

Shh.

I promise.

I promise.

[birds chirping]

[clattering]

[instrumental music]

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0