All language subtitles for Dennis.the.Menace.1959.S03E03.Keep.off.the.Grass.1080p.PCOK.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-Dooky_track1_[eng]

- Hi, Mom.

- Hello, dear.

- Mom?
- Hmm?

- Is it OK if I have this
little piece of beefsteak?

- Well, what do you want it for?

- Well, me and Tommy have been
teaching Mr. Wilson's dog

to bring back a stick
when we throw it for him.

- Little Fremont?
- Yeah.

He learned real fast, too.

- I see, and you want to
give them a piece of meat

as a reward.

All right, Dennis,
you may have it.

- Thanks, Mom.

But it's not for Fremont,
it's for good ol' Mr. Wilson.

- Mr. Wilson?

- He was lying in the hammock
when I threw the stick.

Boy, you never saw
such a black eye!

[theme music]

- Yeah, missed me again.

- You'll be it the
rest of the day.

- Oh, no I--

- Hey, boys, hold it.

Sorry, but you can't play here.

- Why not?

We been playing here
for a long time.

- Yeah, for years.

- Ever since we were little kids.

- Well, I'm sorry,
but you'll just

have to find another place.

There's a new
regulation that says

you have to stay off
the grass in the park.

- Gee, nobody told us.

- There's no sign or anything.

- Don't blame me, I
just follow orders.

Nobody's allowed on the
grass because, well, there's

a campaign on to keep
the park beautiful.

- Sure won't look beautiful
to us if we can't play in it.

- Those are the rules.

Come on, fellas, move along.

- And this policeman
chased you off the grass?

- That's right, Mom.

- That's funny, I've never
seen a "keep off the grass"

sign in the park.

- There wasn't any sign, Dad.

- Are you sure
about that, Dennis?

- Oh sure, we'd have
seen that right away.

- Well, it's too bad
you got chased, son,

but we all have to obey the law.

- I think I'll go over and
see good ol' Mr. Wilson now.

- Supposing he'd chases you home?

- That's different.

I don't mind being
chased away by a friend.

- Henry, I don't think
we should stand for it.

- Stand for what?

- That silly policeman chasing
the boys out of the park.

It's the most high-handed
thing I ever heard of.

- Honey, he was
just doing his job.

- Well, I'd say he
was overdoing it.

I think you ought to go
right over to that park

and tell that policeman he
can't treat our son that way.

- Well now, hold on, honey.

I don't want to get on
the wrong side of the law.

- Then you won't go?

- Well, I'd rather not.

- All right then, I'll go.

If my husband is too meek and
mild to defend his own family,

then I guess it's up to me!

- B-but-- wait a
minute, wait a minute!

Simmer down.

I'll, I'll go have a
word with the policeman.

- I want more than
a word with him.

I want you to
really tell him off.

- All right, I'll tell them off.

And on my way home, I'll
stop a hardware store

and see if I can buy a gun.

- A gun?

- Yeah.

When a fellow lives in the
same house with a tigress,

he can't be too careful.

- Oh, go on.

- Officer!

Oh, officer, can I see
you for a minute, please?

- Oh, something I can for you?

- Yes, I'm, uh, Henry Mitchell.

I live in one of those
houses across from the park.

- Glad to meet you.

I'm Officer Grant.

- Oh, glad to know you.

You're new on this
beat, aren't you?

- Well, I'm new on any beat.

Just got my badge a
couple of days ago.

- Naturally, you're
eager to make good.

- Well, I do my best.

- Well, that's the spirit.

However, my son
tells me that you

chased him and
some of his friends

out of the park a while ago.

Now, don't you think that's
being a little too eager?

- Well, I had to do it, sir.

The department's putting
in new grass seed here.

- Well, the boys had no
way of knowing that.

After all, they've been playing
in this park all their lives

and all of a sudden they're
chased out with no warning

at all.

- Well, I started to
explain to them that--

- I could understand if there was
a sign here or something like

this, but, uh---
there is a sign.

- Yes, there is.

- My boy said there was no sign.

He's usually truthful.

- Well, he wasn't lying, sir.

The fact is that I put the
sign up after they had gone.

What did you say your
full name was, sir?

- Henry Mitchell.

Am I getting a ticket?

- Afraid so.

The law spells it out for you.

- What?

- Now, you can mail in
the $5 if you want.

- $5?

- Right.

Now, you can mail in the $5
or, if you want to argue,

you can appear in Judge
Strickland's court tomorrow.

- I--

- You sure are smart to plant
those big bulbs instead

of flower seeds, Mr. Wilson.

- Oh, I am?

Why?

- Because birds eat your
seeds all the time,

but they could never
swallow those big bulbs.

- You have the makings
of a great naturalist.

[frog croaking]

- What have you got there?

- That's my frog, Sam.

[frog croak]

- You keep him in your pocket?

- Sure, he likes it there.

Sometimes, he stays
there all day.

- Get him out of here.

I don't want him
eating up my bulbs.

- Frogs don't eat
bulbs, Mr. Wilson.

Frogs eat flies.

- Uh-huh.

Well, you fly him out of here.

- Sam hasn't had lunch.

I gotta find him some.

- Oh, hi, Mitchell.

- Hi, Mr. Wilson.

- Where ya been, Dad?

- Oh, I've been over at the park.

I should've stayed home.

Let me warn you about that new
park policeman, Mr. Wilson.

He just give me a ticket for
walking across the grass.

Gonna cost me $5.

- The grass in the park?

But we've always walked
across it before.

Why everybody cuts
through there to--

- Not anymore we don't.

There's a new
ordinance against it.

- The policeman chased
me off too, Dad.

- Yes, and Alice
and I didn't think

it was fair-- especially Alice.

So I went to reason
with him and, well,

he caught me standing
practically on top of the sign,

"Keep off the Grass."

- But there wasn't
any sign there, Dad.

- Well, he put up after you left.

That'll teach me to
mind my own business.

- Now just a minute, Mitchell.

How long has that sign been up?

- Oh, about 15 minutes.

- Why, this is an outrage!

When there's a new
ordinance like this,

we should be warned about it.

Why, this thing wasn't even
mentioned in the newspaper.

- Well, it doesn't
seem quite fair.

I guess the policeman
has a job to do.

- Now Mitchell, don't
you brush this aside.

If you're not willing to
fight for your own sake,

at least do it for Dennis.

- What's Dennis
got to do with it?

- Well, he's reached
the age where

he should be set a good example.

He's not a baby any longer.

He's growing up,
aren't you, Dennis?

- That's right, Mr. Wilson.

When I lose a tooth
now, I don't put it

under my pillow for
the good fairy to take.

I go right to Dad
and get my dime.

- But I am setting
him a good example.

I, I, I broke a law
and I'm paying for it.

- This time, the law was
administered unfairly,

and when that happens,
it, it's our--

it's our duty to fight back.

Yes, that's the American way.

Why, that's what we fought for
in the Army at Valley Forge.

- Dad was in the
Navy, Mr. Wilson.

- Oh?

Now hear this-- you have
a golden opportunity

to teach Dennis that he should
never take injustice lying

down, and I won't allow
you to throw it away.

Well, what are you
waiting for, Mitchell?

You know very well
you were made a victim

of tyrannized legality.

- It was kind of unfair.

He could have given
me a warning first.

- Ah ha!

Now you're talking.

Let's go.

Oh, officer.

We'd like a word with you.

- Mr. Wilson, do you think
we're doing the right thing?

- Of course I am.

Justice will prevail.

- Oh, hello, Mr. Mitchell.

Hi, sonny.
What's up?

- Mr. Wilson says I'm old
enough to be a citizen.

- Huh?

- Uh, never mind the boy.

You just pay attention to me.

Now first, I'd like
to point out that we

are standing on the sidewalk.

- Well, yes, I can see that.

- So don't try to claim
there's grass under our feet.

- Mr. Mitchell, what is this?

- This is Mr. George Wilson.

He has something to say to you.

- Oh no, you're the one
who has something to say.

I'm merely a bystander.

Now go ahead, tell him.

- Well, officer, it's about
this ticket you gave me.

- By which means this
totally unwarranted ticket

which you had the colossal
nerve to force upon him.

- Is that what you mean, sir?
- Well--

- It certainly is.

He thinks you're
completely out of line

and he resents it as any
red-blooded citizen would.

Keep talking, Mitchell.

- Are you saying I
didn't treat you fair?

- Well, officer, it
just seemed to me

that, that you
could have given me

a warning instead of a ticket.

After all, that sign's only
been there a few minutes.

- Well, if it was up
to me, I would have.

But the law is the law.

I don't make it,
I only enforce it.

- Well, he's not
accepting your ticket.

He's giving it
right back to you.

Aren't you, Mitchell?

- Gosh, I--

- Oh, here-- I'll give it back.

Let me.

- Jeepers, Dad.

You're not supposed
to tear up a ticket.

I'll pick it up.

- Never mind, Dennis.

Just leave it there.

All right, officer, what are
you going to do about that?

- Well first, I'm going
to give Mr. Mitchell

another ticket for
walking on the grass.

Then I'm going to give
him a second ticket

for destroying the first one.

That's interfering
with an officer

in the performance of
his duty, you know.

- Look Dad, he's writing
you another one.

He sure can write awful fast.

- Throwing waste
paper on the sidewalk

is against the anti-litter
law, Mr. Mitchell.

Does that answer
your question, sir?

- Oh all right, you've
won this round.

But you'll be hearing
from us again.

Come along, Mitchell.

- I appreciate what you're
trying to do, Mr. Wilson,

but I think you've done enough.

I'd just like to
pay these things

and drop the whole thing.

- Oh no, sir.

Not on your life.

Oh-ho, you got me into this.

I'm in to stay.

- I got you into it?

- Now, don't apologize, Mitchell.

I'm glad you did.

I always welcome
a chance to strike

a blow for better government.

- Good ol' Mr. Wilson.

Nothing scares him.

- Now, let us consider
our strategy.

- Boy, this is exciting.

What's "strategy," Mr. Wilson?

- Oh, our plans, Dennis.

The enemy has withstood
our frontal attack

so we must strike him
on an undefended flank.

- You have to use those
war terms, George?

I feel I should put up
some blackout curtain.

- Martha, this is a
serious business.

Remember, we're
doing this primarily

to teach Dennis a
lesson in civil rights.

- I agree with you, Mr. Wilson.

Have you figured out a
way to handle it yet?

- Yes, Alice, I have
come to a decision.

Tomorrow in court,
I shall appear

as your husband's legal advisor.

- What?

- I'm not sure that's
a good idea, George.

After all, you're not a lawyer.

- Well, who needs a lawyer?

I can plead a case.

Heh heh, I'm quite
an eloquent speaker.

I've done a lot of speaking.

- I know, dear.

- Mr. Wilson, I
appreciate what you're

trying to do but I don't
want to go to court.

- Aw, come on, Dad.

Let's go to court.

I've never seen a court.

- Mitchell, it's the
only thing to do.

- Mr. Wilson, I could go to
jail on a thing like this.

- Boy, I've never
seen a jail either.

- Good, then it's settled.

Now, first thing tomorrow,
I'll go to the library

and search the law
books for material

to support our position.

- Do we have a position?

- Why, we most certainly do.

A strong moral position.

And I shall make that
quite clear to the judge.

"Your Honor," I will say, "for
years we had a right to walk

anywhere we chose in that park.

Then, with no previous
warning whatsoever,

that cherished
right was rescinded.

Oh, we shall keep off the grass
in the future, but in this case

we feel that justice should
be tempered with mercy.

I rest my case."

- Here, here!

- I heard you, too.

Did you hear him, Dad?

- Loud and clear.

And you had a couple of good
points there, Mr. Wilson.

Maybe we do have a case.

- Why, we most certainly do.

And when we appear
in court tomorrow,

I'll be ready for battle.

- (WHISPERING) Don't worry,
Miss Maud, I'll remember.

Oh, there he is.

Guess who this is, Mr. Wilson.

- (WHISPERING) Dennis,
for Heaven's sakes.

- (WHISPERING) Whatcha
doing, Mr. Wilson?

Reading a book?

- (WHISPERING) Well, what
does it look like I'm doing,

for goodness sakes?

Flying a kite?

- (WHISPERING) No, it looks
like you're reading a book.

You are reading a
book, aren't you?

- (WHISPERING) Yes,
I am reading a book.

Now, will you stop!

- Shh.

- (WHISPERING) For
Heaven's sakes.

- (WHISPERING) Mr. Wilson, the
library lady's waving at you.

She wants you to be quiet.

- (WHISPERING) I know, I know.

Now Dennis, I am trying to
find something in here that

will help me win your dad's
case for him this afternoon.

You do want him
to win, don't you?

- (WHISPERING) I
sure do, Mr. Wilson.

- (WHISPERING) Good, then
you go on home and--

- (WHISPERING) So,
I'll help you look.

What are we looking for?

- (WHISPERING) There is
nothing you can help me with.

I'm looking for a similar
case of some kind.

Yes, a precedent.

I have to find a precedent
to tell the judge about.

- (WHISPERING) I know a
president-- Abraham Lincoln.

He was a swell president.

You can tell the
judge about him.

- (WHISPERING) No,
no, no, Dennis.

That's not the kind
of precedent I need.

- It was a swell one.

Everybody said Lincoln
was the greatest--

- Oh, I don't care if he was.

I, I, I-- I'm not interested
in Abraham Lincoln!

That's not what
I'm trying to find!

- And what's wrong with
Abraham Lincoln, mac?

He was the greatest--

- Oh, you keep out of it.

None of your business.

- Here comes the librarian.

She's waving at you.

- Shh!

- Oh, shush yourself!

I'm trying to read
something here.

How anybody can concentrate--

- (WHISPERING) I must ask
you to leave immediately.

- What?

- (WHISPERING) This
is a public library,

not a, a hog calling contest.

- Oh--

- (WHISPERING) Please
go immediately.

- all right, I will go.

I can't hear myself think
in this place anyhow.

- Shh!

- Check these out to me, please.

- (WHISPERING) You're a
nice, quiet boy, Dennis.

You know how to behave in a
public library, don't you?

- (WHISPERING) Yes, ma'am.
I always just whisper.

Don't I, Mr. Wilson.

- Oh.

- (WHISPERING) You're allowed
to work here anytime, Dennis.

- (WHISPERING) Mom says to always
be quiet in the public library,

so I-- hey, Mr.
Wilson, wait for me!

- Dennis!

- Oh Martha, I've
finished my speech.

Ah, how does this sound?

"Your Honor," I will say,
"we come before this bar

today in the sacred
name of justice."

- Oh, that's a good start, dear.

- Well, it gets better
as it goes along.

"Your Honor, we do not believe
that the law was intended

as a trap for the unwary,
but rather, Your Honor,

that the law was meant
to be administered fairly

and justly."

[applause]

- Boy, that sure was a
swell speech, Mr. Wilson.

But what does it mean?

- It means I'm going to try to
talk the judge into dismissing

the charges against
your dad, Dennis.

Ahem.

"The most precious thing
we have, Your Honor,

is our freedom.

I'm sure we all feel exactly
as Patrick Henry felt--"

- Patrick Henry?

Gee, our teacher was
talking about him.

And--
- Ahem.

- Oh, excuse me, Mr. Wilson.

You go ahead.

- Thank you.

"I'm sure we all feel
exactly as Patrick Henry

felt when he said--"

[sneeze]

Gesundheit

- Is that what he said?

What kind of English is that?

German?
- Oh, no, Dennis.

Patrick Henry didn't
say "gesundheit."

Mrs. Wilson sneezed and
I-- oh, for goodness sakes!

- Now, now, don't
get upset, dear.

You'll have to keep
calm in court, you know.

- Oh, yes, I suppose
you're right, Martha.

Where was I?

Oh yes-- "I'm sure we all
feel as Patrick Henry felt,

when he said--
[doorbell]

- Oh, great Scott!

- Oh, is that what he said?

Boy, wait till I
tell our teacher.

She thinks he said
something about giving him

liberty or giving-- oh, hi, Dad.

- Son, Mom wants you
to come home and wash

up and get your jacket on.

It's almost time to leave.

- OK.

- I'd better change my dress.

Excuse me.

- Boy, this sure is gonna
be exciting, huh, Dad?

- Well, yes sir, this
is our day in court.

How do you feel, defendant?

- Well, I ate a hearty breakfast,
if that answers your question.

- And wait till
you hear the swell

speech Mr. Wilson made up, Dad.

It's terrific.

Hey, Mr. Wilson, can I bring
my friends to hear you?

Can I bring Tommy
and Chuck and Sam?

- Uh, no, Dennis.

I don't think the boys
had better come, no.

- OK.

When we get ready
to go, Mr. Wilson,

I'll carry your
briefcase for ya.

- All right, Dennis, fine.

Well, Mitchell, before this
day is over, that boy of yours

will have learned
a valuable lesson.

- Yes, he will.

If we win, he'll learn
that a man should always

fight for his rights.

If we lose, he'll
learn that it's

safer to keep his
big mouth shut.

- Eh, George Wilson, Your Honor.

Uh, I wish to represent
the defendant.

- Very well.

Are you an attorney, Mr. Wilson?

- Oh, well, uh, no.

No, your honor.

I-- well, that is,
uh-- well, I, I'm

here as a friend of the court.

- Good.
The court can use a few friends.

Proceed.

- Thank you, Your Honor.

Ahem.

We come before this bar today
in the sacred name of justice.

We do not believe that
the law was intended

as a trap for the
unwary, but rather

that the law was meant to be--

- Just a minute,
Mr. Wilson, please.

We, uh, run this court
in a very informal way.

There's no need for
any long speeches.

- Well, uh, yes, Your Honor.

But you see, I, uh--
oh, just as you wish.

- Don't you want to hear Mr.
Wilson's speech, Your Honor?

He's been working on it all
day and it's a dandy speech.

- Who, who is this young citizen?

- Oh, uh, this is Dennis
Mitchell, Your Honor.

Uh, he's our witness, but--

- Oh, well, take
the stand, Dennis.

Climb right up here.

Now Dennis, you understand
that a witness in court

must always tell the truth?

- Oh, I know all about
court, Your Honor.

I watch Perry
Mason all the time.

- Oh, you do.
- Yes sir.

So, I swear to tell the
truth, the whole truth,

and nothing but the truth.

State your name.

- Andrew Strickland,
municipal-- well,

let's get on with
the case, Mr. Wilson.

- Oh.

Uh, yes, Your Honor.

Now, we feel that
the defendant should

have been given a warning
in this case, Your Honor,

instead of a citation.

- Oh?

- I have a copy here
of the city code

and some notes I made
on similar cases.

[frog croak]

- A little indigestion,
Mr. Wilson?

- Oh no, Your Honor.

That wasn't I.

[frog croak]

- What is going on here?

- Great Scott!

Dennis!

- It's Sam, judge.

I forgot all about him.

- Well, get him out of here.

What's he doing here anyhow?

- I asked you, Mr. Wilson.

I asked you if I could bring
Tommy and Chuck and Sam,

but you said the
boys couldn't come.

But Sam's a girl, so I--

- I'm sorry, Your Honor.

Dennis!

- Here, I'll put him in
Mr. Wilson's briefcase.

- Oh no you don't, Dennis!

- Get out of that thing.

- Bailiff, take care of
the, uh, lady, will you?

[frog croak]

- Careful, Sam doesn't
like to be held too tight.

- Dennis, come along now.

- Oh!

- Here, hold that down, lady,
so he don't get away, will you?

[gavel pounding]

- Now let's get on with the case.

- Yes, Your Honor.

Uh, now, Dennis,
I want you to tell

the judge just what
happened yesterday morning.

Now, you were playing
the park, is that right?

- We were playing tag on the
grass where we always play

and this Mr. Officer said, "You
kids can't play here anymore."

And he chased us off,
so we all went home.

- Didn't you know you weren't
supposed to play there anymore?

Weren't there any
signs on the lawn?

- No sir.

- Oh, there were no
signs of any kind

on the grass at that
time, Your Honor.

Therefore, we feel
the negligence

on the part of
the city officials

should nullify the case against
my client and gain for us--

- Let the boy talk,
Mr., uh, Mason.

- The name is Wilson, Your Honor.

- Oh, my mistake.

Were there no signs posted, son?

- No sir, The officer
put the sign up later

and he didn't tell
Dad it was there.

- Your Honor, I intend to show
mitigating circumstances here.

Oh true, Mr. Mitchell did
walk on the grass, but, well,

we've done that for years and--

[frog croaking]

- I'll take care
of it, Your Honor.

[frog croaking]

- I gather you don't
think your dad ought

to have to pay a fine, eh?

- No sir, because it
wasn't his fault.

But I guess you do need
the money awful bad though,

don't you, judge?

- What?

- I've got $4 in my piggy
bank, and you can have that.

- What makes you think I
need the money, Dennis?

- Well, Mr. Wilson said
you were the poorest

judge this town ever had.

So if you're poor--

- Oh, is that so?

- Oh, well, that isn't
what I meant, Your Honor.

I-- oh, good Heavens.

Oh, great Scott.

[frog croaking]

BAILIFF (OFFSCREEN):
Hey, hey, come back here.

Here, froggy.
- I'll get him!

Here, Sam!
Here, Sam!

- Here, Froggy!
Come back here!

Frog!
- I got him, I got him!

[frog croak]

- And I'd like to say
further that we apologize

most humbly for the
confusion, Your Honor.

- Oh, never mind about that.

Now, there was a violation
here, Mr. Mitchell.

We're agreed on that?

Yes, Your Honor.

- I realize that you
people have been

accustomed to crossing the
park area here for years.

- Oh, yes, yes, indeed.

We won't do it anymore,
but we always have.

- Furthermore, your claim that
you were given no prior warning

seems quite valid.

I see from the arresting
officer's report

that the sign was posted
just a few minutes

before your violation.

- Yes, sir.

- I think that even a poor judge
would concede the point here.

Don't let it happen again.

Case dismissed.

- Congratulations, Mitchell.

- This sure was fun, judge.

I hope Dad gets to
come back here a lot.

[theme music]

ANNOUNCER: This has been a
Screen Gems film production

from the Hollywood studios
of Columbia Pictures.