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1
00:00:06,906 --> 00:00:07,873
- Oh, hello, dear.
2
00:00:07,874 --> 00:00:09,742
- Hi, sweetheart.
- Hi, Dad.
3
00:00:09,743 --> 00:00:10,709
- Hi, son.
4
00:00:10,710 --> 00:00:11,643
How was your day?
5
00:00:11,644 --> 00:00:12,177
- Oh, fine.
6
00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:13,812
Nothing unusual.
7
00:00:13,813 --> 00:00:16,148
- There were some men here when
I got home from school today.
8
00:00:16,149 --> 00:00:17,983
They fixed the telephone.
- Really?
9
00:00:17,984 --> 00:00:18,917
What was wrong with it?
10
00:00:18,918 --> 00:00:20,386
- Nothing.
11
00:00:20,387 --> 00:00:22,388
Only now you can call
anywhere in the United States
12
00:00:22,389 --> 00:00:24,189
without going
through the operator.
13
00:00:24,190 --> 00:00:25,591
- It works swell.
14
00:00:25,592 --> 00:00:28,360
Like, if you want to call
Aunt Sally in New York,
15
00:00:28,361 --> 00:00:31,563
you just dial a number, then
you dial your regular number,
16
00:00:31,564 --> 00:00:34,867
and the phone goes
didly, didly, didly.
17
00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:37,736
- We live in a wonderful world.
18
00:00:37,737 --> 00:00:41,908
- Aunt Sally was sure
surprised to hear my voice.
19
00:00:48,915 --> 00:00:50,850
[theme music]
20
00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:15,140
- Thank you, Mrs. Wilson.
21
00:01:15,141 --> 00:01:16,475
- Oh, thank you, my dear.
22
00:01:16,476 --> 00:01:21,313
Oh, I think I'll have
two just to celebrate.
23
00:01:21,314 --> 00:01:23,148
- My goodness, Mr.
Wilson, I'd celebrate too
24
00:01:23,149 --> 00:01:26,118
if someone offered me $2,000
for a coin collection.
25
00:01:26,119 --> 00:01:30,289
- Well, I simply can't
quite get over it.
26
00:01:30,290 --> 00:01:33,425
I merely put an ad in that
coin collector's magazine.
27
00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:35,427
- And the next thing
George knew, he
28
00:01:35,428 --> 00:01:37,696
had a call from this
Mr. Sheldon from upstate
29
00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:40,466
saying he was coming
down tomorrow afternoon.
30
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:43,369
- Well, $2,000 certainly is
a lot of money, Mr. Wilson.
31
00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:44,536
But aren't you
afraid you're going
32
00:01:44,537 --> 00:01:46,171
to miss looking at
your collection?
33
00:01:46,172 --> 00:01:48,374
- Well, if I get
lonely, Mitchell,
34
00:01:48,375 --> 00:01:54,680
I always figure I can
stare at the $2,000.
35
00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:56,016
[door closing]
36
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:57,316
- Hi.
37
00:01:57,317 --> 00:01:58,317
Is it time for the
fortune cookies yet?
38
00:01:58,318 --> 00:01:59,885
- Of course it is, dear.
39
00:01:59,886 --> 00:02:02,054
I almost forgot about them.
40
00:02:02,055 --> 00:02:03,922
- Are your hands
clean, young man?
41
00:02:03,923 --> 00:02:04,823
- One of them is.
42
00:02:04,824 --> 00:02:06,291
I've been saving it.
43
00:02:06,292 --> 00:02:09,094
- There's nothing like learning
to save at an early age.
44
00:02:09,095 --> 00:02:10,095
- Hi, Mr. Wilson.
45
00:02:10,096 --> 00:02:11,697
- Well, hello there, Dennis.
46
00:02:11,698 --> 00:02:15,234
- Jeepers, aren't you all excited
about getting a fortune cookie?
47
00:02:15,235 --> 00:02:17,069
- Dennis, it's a
wonder I've managed
48
00:02:17,070 --> 00:02:20,839
to contain myself this long.
49
00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:22,107
- Alice, you're first.
50
00:02:22,108 --> 00:02:23,842
- All right.
51
00:02:23,843 --> 00:02:27,646
You are thinking of buying
yourself something you desire.
52
00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:29,682
Hesitate no longer.
53
00:02:29,683 --> 00:02:31,483
Isn't that nice?
54
00:02:31,484 --> 00:02:35,487
- Stabbed in the back
by a fortune cookie.
55
00:02:35,488 --> 00:02:39,358
- Enjoy the woods but get
not lost in the forest.
56
00:02:39,359 --> 00:02:40,926
Now how do you
suppose they knew I
57
00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:43,529
was planning to
play golf tomorrow?
58
00:02:43,530 --> 00:02:44,663
- Jeepers, Dad.
59
00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:47,466
Maybe it means we're
going on a camping trip.
60
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:48,567
- Quick.
61
00:02:48,568 --> 00:02:51,136
Somebody open another
fortune cookie.
62
00:02:51,137 --> 00:02:55,008
- Your thriftiness makes
a loved one happy.
63
00:02:55,108 --> 00:02:57,109
I think I liked Alice's better.
64
00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:57,943
- I've got an idea.
65
00:02:57,944 --> 00:02:58,911
Why don't you exchange?
66
00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:01,146
- Oh, no you don't.
67
00:03:01,147 --> 00:03:02,081
- Gee, Mr. Wilson.
68
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:03,082
It's your turn.
69
00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:04,784
- Oh, my turn.
All right.
70
00:03:10,056 --> 00:03:13,425
Beware of tomorrow.
71
00:03:13,426 --> 00:03:14,126
- Uh oh.
72
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:16,628
- Oh, isn't that silly?
73
00:03:16,629 --> 00:03:19,131
- I wouldn't take those
fortune cookies too seriously.
74
00:03:19,132 --> 00:03:20,766
- Well, this one
doesn't count anyway.
75
00:03:20,767 --> 00:03:22,801
It's stale.
76
00:03:22,802 --> 00:03:25,404
- Dennis, you haven't opened
your fortune cookie yet.
77
00:03:25,405 --> 00:03:27,307
- I've been saving mine for last.
78
00:03:31,244 --> 00:03:36,081
The time has come for
you and your friends
79
00:03:36,082 --> 00:03:38,817
to help a friend in trouble.
80
00:03:38,818 --> 00:03:40,152
Jeepers, Mr. Wilson.
81
00:03:40,153 --> 00:03:42,955
That friend in
trouble must mean you.
82
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:45,157
- Dennis, the only
time I am in trouble
83
00:03:45,158 --> 00:03:49,395
is when you try to help me.
84
00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:50,997
- Well, it's time this
side of the Ouija board
85
00:03:51,097 --> 00:03:51,897
was getting home.
86
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:52,865
- Oh, must you, Mitchell?
87
00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:54,133
- Yes.
88
00:03:54,134 --> 00:03:55,567
- Thank you for the
lovely tea, Mrs. Wilson.
89
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:56,969
- You welcome, dear.
- And the swell fortune cookies.
90
00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:58,570
- It was very pleasant.
- Thank you.
91
00:03:58,571 --> 00:03:59,571
- Bye bye.
92
00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:00,139
- Good bye.
93
00:04:00,140 --> 00:04:02,741
See you later.
94
00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:04,343
- Don't you worry, Mr. Wilson.
95
00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:07,613
I won't let anything bad
happen to you tomorrow.
96
00:04:07,614 --> 00:04:08,747
- Well, thank you, Dennis.
97
00:04:08,748 --> 00:04:10,517
Now I can rest easier tonight.
98
00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:17,189
Beware of tomorrow.
99
00:04:17,190 --> 00:04:19,725
Oh, fiddle faddle.
100
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:21,060
- Hey, Mr. Wilson.
101
00:04:21,061 --> 00:04:22,327
- Hmm?
102
00:04:22,328 --> 00:04:24,263
- Your afternoon paper just came.
103
00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,698
- Oh, thank you, Dennis.
104
00:04:25,699 --> 00:04:28,200
- Let's look and see if
it says anything more
105
00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:30,703
about your having
trouble tomorrow.
106
00:04:30,704 --> 00:04:32,271
- What are you talking about?
107
00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:35,207
- He means your horoscope, dear.
108
00:04:35,208 --> 00:04:37,076
- Dennis, I expect
tomorrow to be one
109
00:04:37,077 --> 00:04:39,345
of the most delightful
days of my life.
110
00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:42,081
- Then why you afraid to look?
111
00:04:42,082 --> 00:04:43,649
- I am not afraid to look.
112
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:48,587
It's simply that I don't
believe-- oh, what's the use?
113
00:04:48,588 --> 00:04:51,423
All right, all right,
I'll-- oh, yes.
114
00:04:51,424 --> 00:04:52,358
Here we are.
115
00:04:52,359 --> 00:04:54,361
Eh, Scorpio, Scorp-- yes.
116
00:04:56,629 --> 00:05:00,065
Well, now how
ridiculous can you get?
117
00:05:00,066 --> 00:05:01,367
- What does it say, dear?
118
00:05:01,368 --> 00:05:04,036
- Be extremely careful
between the next sun
119
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:06,505
rise and the next sunset.
120
00:05:06,506 --> 00:05:07,840
- Jeepers, Mr. Wilson.
121
00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:09,742
You're really in for it.
122
00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:10,709
- Oh, now, Dennis--
123
00:05:10,710 --> 00:05:11,810
- But don't you worry.
124
00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:12,811
Tomorrow's Saturday.
125
00:05:12,812 --> 00:05:15,514
So I can be around all day.
126
00:05:15,515 --> 00:05:17,316
- Oh, joy.
127
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:19,752
- What sort of trouble do
you suppose you're in for?
128
00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:21,353
- I don't know, Dennis.
129
00:05:21,354 --> 00:05:23,889
But as soon as the evil spirits
communicate the message to me,
130
00:05:23,890 --> 00:05:26,792
I will let you know.
131
00:05:26,793 --> 00:05:28,260
- I've got a better idea.
132
00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:30,929
Let's go down to the drug
store and get you weighed.
133
00:05:30,930 --> 00:05:33,165
- Dennis, I know what I weigh.
134
00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:35,634
- Yeah, but do you know
what's on the other side
135
00:05:35,635 --> 00:05:37,436
of that little card?
136
00:05:37,437 --> 00:05:39,138
- Now, Dennis, for
the last time, I
137
00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:40,806
am not afraid of
what is supposedly
138
00:05:40,807 --> 00:05:42,408
in store for me tomorrow.
139
00:05:42,409 --> 00:05:46,612
- Jeepers, Mr. Wilson, you're
about the bravest friend
140
00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:47,580
I've ever had.
141
00:05:53,219 --> 00:06:00,059
- Be extremely careful
for-- hey, oh, Martha,
142
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:02,361
I think I'll go
for a little walk.
143
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,229
- Now dear, I hope
you're not going
144
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:07,499
to be concerned about those
silly little predictions.
145
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:10,269
- Martha, I have lived too
long to let a little boy's
146
00:06:10,270 --> 00:06:16,208
war of nerves get me all upset
over a stale fortune cookie.
147
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:17,344
I'll see you later.
148
00:06:39,165 --> 00:06:40,266
Oh, good grief.
149
00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:50,275
{\an8}- The best of luck tomorrow.
150
00:06:50,276 --> 00:06:52,845
{\an8}You'll need it to
get through the day.
151
00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:53,846
- Gosh.
152
00:06:53,847 --> 00:06:55,314
- Jeepers, Tommy.
153
00:06:55,315 --> 00:06:58,685
Mr. Wilson's even in worse
danger than I thought.
154
00:07:06,326 --> 00:07:07,927
- Tommy.
TOMMY (ON PHONE): Yeah?
155
00:07:08,028 --> 00:07:10,029
- You all set to start
guarding Mr. Wilson's
156
00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:11,563
house in the morning?
157
00:07:11,564 --> 00:07:13,298
- Boy, am I.
158
00:07:13,299 --> 00:07:14,633
- I'll meet you first
thing in the morning.
159
00:07:14,634 --> 00:07:18,203
And we'll find some more
kids for guard duty, OK?
160
00:07:18,204 --> 00:07:19,338
- OK.
161
00:07:19,339 --> 00:07:21,440
- And, say, Tommy, be
sure to bring along
162
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:24,276
your atomic
disintegrater gun too.
163
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:25,878
- What good would that do?
164
00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:26,712
It's busted.
165
00:07:26,713 --> 00:07:28,280
- Bring it anyway.
166
00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:31,617
Maybe the news hasn't gotten
around yet that it's no good.
167
00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,519
I'll see ya.
168
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:41,060
And please watch over mom and
dad and Tommy and Margaret
169
00:07:41,061 --> 00:07:43,662
and especially
good old Mr. Wilson
170
00:07:43,663 --> 00:07:46,598
because he's supposed to
have an awful tomorrow.
171
00:07:46,599 --> 00:07:49,568
Over and out.
172
00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:51,070
- Over and out?
173
00:07:51,071 --> 00:07:53,706
- I heard a police man say it
on television when he hung up.
174
00:07:53,707 --> 00:07:57,176
- Well, I doubt if he was
speaking on the same network.
175
00:07:57,177 --> 00:08:00,779
Let's hear you sign off in
the good old fashioned way.
176
00:08:00,780 --> 00:08:02,381
- OK.
177
00:08:02,382 --> 00:08:03,048
Amen.
178
00:08:03,049 --> 00:08:05,551
- That's better.
179
00:08:05,552 --> 00:08:06,185
- Good night, mom.
180
00:08:06,186 --> 00:08:07,554
- Good night, dear.
181
00:08:13,193 --> 00:08:15,461
- Young man, what's that
bump under your covers?
182
00:08:15,462 --> 00:08:16,395
- Bump?
183
00:08:16,396 --> 00:08:18,697
What bump?
184
00:08:18,698 --> 00:08:21,667
- This bump.
185
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:23,168
- Oh, that bump.
186
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:27,239
I thought I'd better keep
an eye on Mr. Wilson in case
187
00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:29,642
they try to get to
him during the night.
188
00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:38,585
[grunting]
189
00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:44,090
[grunting]
190
00:08:47,894 --> 00:08:51,063
- [sighs] What a miserable night.
191
00:08:51,064 --> 00:08:53,399
I didn't fall asleep
until 3 o'clock.
192
00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:55,200
Then I had a
nightmare about Dennis
193
00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:57,469
stuffing me full
of fortune cookies.
194
00:08:57,470 --> 00:09:00,839
- Oh, you poor dear.
195
00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:03,609
- You know, Martha, if I knew
how to get hold of Mr. Sheldon,
196
00:09:03,610 --> 00:09:06,779
I'd tell him not to
come down here today.
197
00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:08,847
- Oh, George, you're just tired.
198
00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:11,650
Why, yesterday you were all
excited about selling your coin
199
00:09:11,651 --> 00:09:12,518
collection.
200
00:09:12,519 --> 00:09:13,719
- Oh, I still am.
201
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:16,522
It's just that I've about
decided this might not
202
00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:19,825
be the best day to
complete the transaction.
203
00:09:19,826 --> 00:09:22,027
- George Wilson, I'm
surprised at you
204
00:09:22,028 --> 00:09:24,329
giving into these silly
predictions like this.
205
00:09:24,330 --> 00:09:26,832
- Well, Martha, that's not true.
206
00:09:26,833 --> 00:09:28,434
Didn't I get up
this morning even
207
00:09:28,435 --> 00:09:30,202
though that magazine
on astrology
208
00:09:30,203 --> 00:09:33,172
advised me to stay
in bed all day?
209
00:09:33,173 --> 00:09:36,041
- George, forget about that
gibberish you've been reading.
210
00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:39,044
You're going to have a
perfectly lovely day.
211
00:09:39,045 --> 00:09:41,046
- Oh, you're right, my dear.
212
00:09:41,047 --> 00:09:43,749
Of course I'm going to have
a perfectly lovely day.
213
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,451
- That's the spirit, George.
214
00:09:45,452 --> 00:09:46,652
- Oh.
215
00:09:46,653 --> 00:09:48,053
- George, are you all right?
216
00:09:48,054 --> 00:09:49,455
- Confound chair.
217
00:09:49,456 --> 00:09:50,756
You see, Martha?
218
00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:51,657
You see?
219
00:09:51,658 --> 00:09:53,125
It's starting already.
220
00:09:53,126 --> 00:09:54,426
- Oh, George, anyone
would put a--
221
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:56,729
DENNIS (OFFSCREEN):
Hup two, three, four.
222
00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:58,664
Hup, two, three, four.
223
00:09:58,665 --> 00:10:00,599
Hup, two, three four.
224
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:08,107
Hup, two, three, four.
225
00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:10,042
Margaret, you're out of step.
226
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:11,076
- I am not.
227
00:10:11,077 --> 00:10:12,277
Everybody else is.
228
00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:13,679
- Oh.
229
00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:15,214
Hup, two, three, four--
230
00:10:15,215 --> 00:10:17,683
- It's only Dennis and his
friends playing soldier, dear.
231
00:10:17,684 --> 00:10:19,184
- Oh.
232
00:10:19,185 --> 00:10:20,486
Well, I wish they'd hurry
up and get shipped overseas.
233
00:10:20,487 --> 00:10:22,955
DENNIS (OFFSCREEN):
Hup, two, three, four.
234
00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:25,324
Squad, halt.
235
00:10:25,325 --> 00:10:28,327
Now remember, we're here to
protect good old Mr. Wilson.
236
00:10:28,328 --> 00:10:30,662
You guard the front
door, Private.
237
00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:31,764
- Aye, aye, sir.
238
00:10:31,765 --> 00:10:34,400
- Seymour, aye,
aye, is Navy talk.
239
00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:35,601
- That's OK.
240
00:10:35,602 --> 00:10:37,903
I'm using a water gun.
241
00:10:37,904 --> 00:10:39,872
- Squad, attention.
242
00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:43,208
Forward march.
243
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:45,744
To the rear, march.
244
00:10:45,745 --> 00:10:47,713
- Girls.
245
00:10:47,714 --> 00:10:49,682
Forward, march.
246
00:10:49,683 --> 00:10:57,556
Hup, two, three, four.
247
00:10:57,557 --> 00:10:58,557
Halt.
248
00:10:58,558 --> 00:10:59,925
- Captain.
249
00:10:59,926 --> 00:11:01,493
- What is it, Private?
250
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:02,661
- I'm thirsty.
251
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,898
- Well, shoot yourself
with your water gun.
252
00:11:05,899 --> 00:11:12,071
- OK.
253
00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:13,238
- You guard out here, Margaret.
254
00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:15,140
- I don't like it out there.
255
00:11:15,141 --> 00:11:17,676
There's nothing to
guard but the sidewalk.
256
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:19,211
- Listen, Margaret.
257
00:11:19,212 --> 00:11:22,581
If you want to be in our army,
you've got to obey orders.
258
00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:23,749
- All right, smarty.
259
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:24,917
I quit.
260
00:11:24,918 --> 00:11:26,485
- You can't quit an army.
261
00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:30,356
You either got to get shot or
get a dishonorable discharge.
262
00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:33,092
- I think she ought to be shot.
263
00:11:33,093 --> 00:11:35,094
- Well, it'll have
to be in the back.
264
00:11:35,095 --> 00:11:42,002
Good bye.
265
00:11:42,102 --> 00:11:43,003
- Gee, Dennis.
266
00:11:43,103 --> 00:11:45,104
What are we going to do now?
267
00:11:45,105 --> 00:11:47,373
- Well, stand guard, Tommy.
268
00:11:47,374 --> 00:11:49,541
You go see if you can
get reinforcements.
269
00:11:49,542 --> 00:12:03,722
- OK.
270
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:07,626
- Martha, I think I'll go
see if the mail has come.
271
00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:09,561
- All right, dear.
272
00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:14,433
[drums]
273
00:12:14,434 --> 00:12:16,402
- Halt.
274
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,604
- Oh, good grief.
275
00:12:18,605 --> 00:12:19,539
- Who goes there?
276
00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:26,779
- Little boy, go home.
277
00:12:26,780 --> 00:12:28,348
Oh, great Scott.
278
00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:33,352
- You're not supposed
to shoot him, Seymour.
279
00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:34,953
That's good old Mr. Wilson.
280
00:12:34,954 --> 00:12:37,756
- Dennis, I'm afraid you
and your small friend
281
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:40,192
will have to find somewhere
else to play today.
282
00:12:40,193 --> 00:12:41,226
- Oh, we're not playing.
283
00:12:41,227 --> 00:12:43,095
We're guarding you from harm.
284
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:44,396
- Well, thank you, Dennis.
285
00:12:44,397 --> 00:12:47,366
But that will be quite
unnec-- what hit me?
286
00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:49,935
- A shingle fell off the roof.
287
00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:50,936
- Martha.
288
00:12:50,937 --> 00:12:52,138
Oh, Martha.
289
00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:56,475
- How's you're head, dear?
290
00:12:56,476 --> 00:12:57,242
- Huh?
291
00:12:57,243 --> 00:12:59,478
Oh, my head's all right.
292
00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:01,280
- George, why don't
you spend some time
293
00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:02,614
with your coin collection?
294
00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:04,216
It'll be the last
day you'll have it.
295
00:13:04,217 --> 00:13:07,052
- Martha, I'm afraid to
touch my coin collection.
296
00:13:07,053 --> 00:13:09,421
I'm afraid to touch
anything today.
297
00:13:09,422 --> 00:13:11,190
I have the most
awful premonition
298
00:13:11,191 --> 00:13:14,927
that anything I start will
end in complete disaster.
299
00:13:14,928 --> 00:13:17,363
DENNIS (OFFSCREEN):
Hey, Mr. Wilson.
300
00:13:17,364 --> 00:13:18,697
- Oh.
301
00:13:18,698 --> 00:13:21,534
And to top it all off, Dennis
insists upon guarding me.
302
00:13:25,839 --> 00:13:27,306
What is it, Dennis?
303
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:31,610
- A mysterious stranger left
this for you and ran off.
304
00:13:31,611 --> 00:13:33,245
- Oh, is that so?
305
00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:36,081
- Boy, he sure was mean looking.
306
00:13:36,082 --> 00:13:38,651
- He was even meaner
looking than you.
307
00:13:42,088 --> 00:13:46,993
[dog barking]
308
00:13:47,093 --> 00:13:49,728
- What is that animal doing here?
309
00:13:49,729 --> 00:13:52,197
- That's Tiny, our reinforcement.
310
00:13:52,198 --> 00:13:55,300
- It's a friend we borrowed
to help guard you.
311
00:13:55,301 --> 00:14:00,439
- Well, you make sure that your
friend stays off my flowers.
312
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:03,876
- You're not just going to
open that box, Mr. Wilson?
313
00:14:03,877 --> 00:14:05,244
- And why not?
314
00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:08,248
- Jeepers, have you
forgotten what day this is?
315
00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:11,316
- Maybe there's a bomb in it.
316
00:14:11,317 --> 00:14:13,852
- I think I hear a clock ticking.
317
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,821
- I'll get a pan of water.
318
00:14:15,822 --> 00:14:16,889
- Oh, Dennis.
319
00:14:16,890 --> 00:14:18,524
Now you stopping being silly.
320
00:14:18,525 --> 00:14:20,259
A bomb?
321
00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:26,366
Oh, fiddle faddle.
Bombs.
322
00:14:29,502 --> 00:14:32,438
- We got lots of
bandages at our house.
323
00:14:32,439 --> 00:14:34,406
- Dennis, for the
last time, I want
324
00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:37,676
you to take your squad
of commandos and go home.
325
00:14:37,677 --> 00:14:40,245
- But my fortune cookie
said me and my friends
326
00:14:40,246 --> 00:14:42,648
were supposed to
look after you today.
327
00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:44,984
- Well, if you don't
stop looking after me,
328
00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:47,920
there won't be anything
left to look after.
329
00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:49,188
- OK.
330
00:14:49,189 --> 00:14:51,557
Well, we'll leave Tiny
here just in case.
331
00:14:51,558 --> 00:14:53,125
- Uh, all right.
332
00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:56,296
Bye.
[sighs]
333
00:15:04,637 --> 00:15:05,571
- What's that, dear?
334
00:15:05,572 --> 00:15:07,272
- Oh, that's just
a package, Martha.
335
00:15:07,273 --> 00:15:08,907
- Well, aren't you
going to open it?
336
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:09,775
- Open it?
337
00:15:09,776 --> 00:15:11,076
Oh, yes.
338
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:12,811
Of course I'll open
up it a little later.
339
00:15:12,812 --> 00:15:15,214
- George Wilson what
has come over you?
340
00:15:15,215 --> 00:15:16,882
- Oh, nothing, Martha.
341
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:17,750
It's just-- oh, no.
342
00:15:17,751 --> 00:15:19,918
No, no, no, no, no.
343
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:20,886
Don't.
344
00:15:20,887 --> 00:15:22,354
- But why?
345
00:15:22,355 --> 00:15:24,857
- Well, for one thing, how
do we know what's inside?
346
00:15:24,858 --> 00:15:27,459
I-- it could even be a bomb.
347
00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:28,660
- A bomb?
348
00:15:28,661 --> 00:15:31,897
Oh, really.
349
00:15:31,898 --> 00:15:33,065
- Well, all right, Martha.
350
00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:35,901
If you insist, I'll open it.
351
00:15:35,902 --> 00:15:37,337
Ah.
Ahh!
352
00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:44,076
- Why it's my new hat.
353
00:15:44,077 --> 00:15:45,944
How do you like it, dear?
354
00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,080
- Oh, it's very nice, Martha.
355
00:15:48,081 --> 00:15:52,751
- George, don't you feel
just a little foolish?
356
00:15:52,752 --> 00:15:55,721
- Like the village idiot.
357
00:15:55,722 --> 00:15:58,557
- Now then, why don't you go out
and take a nice, quiet walk.
358
00:15:58,558 --> 00:16:01,026
And when you come back,
you'll be all relaxed
359
00:16:01,027 --> 00:16:03,662
for your visit with Mr.
Sheldon this afternoon.
360
00:16:03,663 --> 00:16:04,730
- All right, my dear.
361
00:16:04,731 --> 00:16:06,933
I'll do just that.
362
00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:08,233
[laughs]
363
00:16:08,234 --> 00:16:10,769
How ridiculous can a
grown man get, huh?
364
00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:12,638
- Have a good time, dear.
365
00:16:12,639 --> 00:16:13,772
- I will, Martha.
366
00:16:13,773 --> 00:16:15,040
And you can be
sure of one thing.
367
00:16:15,041 --> 00:16:16,909
This is one Scorpio
who's not going
368
00:16:16,910 --> 00:16:18,311
to have the rest
of his day ruined.
369
00:16:21,047 --> 00:16:23,048
[dog barking]
370
00:16:23,049 --> 00:16:24,583
MR. WILSON (OFFSCREEN):
(YELLING) Oh.
371
00:16:24,584 --> 00:16:25,552
Oh, Martha.
372
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:38,664
- Hello, again.
373
00:16:38,665 --> 00:16:40,532
And thank you,
ladies and gentlemen.
374
00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:42,901
It's a pleasure to
be back with you.
375
00:16:42,902 --> 00:16:46,705
And now for a look
at today's prizes
376
00:16:46,706 --> 00:16:52,144
before we again play our
Remember When music quiz.
377
00:16:52,145 --> 00:16:54,480
All righty, are we ready?
378
00:16:54,481 --> 00:17:00,119
Now listen carefully to today's
mystery tune of yesterday.
379
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:06,025
[music playing]
380
00:17:06,026 --> 00:17:08,761
- Hi, Mr. Wilson.
- Dennis, please.
381
00:17:08,762 --> 00:17:10,062
I'm listening.
382
00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:14,133
- Remember, the number
I call may be yours.
383
00:17:14,134 --> 00:17:16,235
- We brought you some home
made fudge, Mr. Wilson.
384
00:17:16,236 --> 00:17:19,571
- Dennis, I thought I
asked-- oh, my goodness.
385
00:17:19,572 --> 00:17:24,043
- We would have
386
00:17:24,044 --> 00:17:27,646
but we got all sticky making it.
387
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:28,781
- Delicious.
388
00:17:28,782 --> 00:17:30,482
But it is sort of
gooey isn't it?
389
00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:33,852
- That's because we ran out
of sugar and used molasses.
390
00:17:33,853 --> 00:17:40,526
- Well, whatever is in it-- hmm.
391
00:17:40,527 --> 00:17:42,628
Now that song certainly
sound familiar.
392
00:17:42,629 --> 00:17:46,566
I have it.
393
00:17:49,936 --> 00:17:52,237
It's-- [garbled]
394
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:54,206
- What'd you say, Mr. Wilson?
395
00:17:54,207 --> 00:17:56,775
- [garbled] with you.
396
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:59,111
- Gee, you sound
funny, Mr. Wilson.
397
00:17:59,112 --> 00:18:01,046
- Say it again.
398
00:18:01,047 --> 00:18:02,214
- Oh, dear.
399
00:18:02,215 --> 00:18:04,149
- And now for the
day's call, which
400
00:18:04,150 --> 00:18:09,422
is going to a Mr. George
Wilson at 625 Elm Street.
401
00:18:13,793 --> 00:18:14,626
- That's me.
402
00:18:14,627 --> 00:18:17,062
He's calling me.
403
00:18:17,063 --> 00:18:18,664
- Did you hear that Tommy?
404
00:18:18,665 --> 00:18:19,399
- Oh, boy.
405
00:18:22,802 --> 00:18:24,737
[phone ringing]
406
00:18:24,738 --> 00:18:27,106
- (GARBLED) Hello.
407
00:18:27,107 --> 00:18:29,875
- Is this, uh, Mr. George Wilson?
408
00:18:29,876 --> 00:18:31,143
- (GARBLED) That's right.
409
00:18:31,144 --> 00:18:32,811
- Jeepers, isn't this
exciting, Tommy?
410
00:18:32,812 --> 00:18:36,116
- Mr. Wilson, I'm having a bit
of trouble understanding you.
411
00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:41,920
- (GARBLED) I'm stuck.
412
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:44,223
- Try chewing faster, Mr. Wilson.
413
00:18:44,224 --> 00:18:46,592
- Mr. Wilson, this
is Mad Cap Madden.
414
00:18:46,593 --> 00:18:50,062
Can you tell me the name
of the song I just played?
415
00:18:50,063 --> 00:18:52,598
- [garbled]
416
00:18:52,599 --> 00:18:56,702
- Mr. Wilson, uh, you'll
have to speak clearer.
417
00:18:56,703 --> 00:18:58,070
- Swallow, Mr. Wilson.
418
00:18:58,071 --> 00:18:59,238
- (GARBLED) I can't.
419
00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:01,006
- Get some water, Tommy.
420
00:19:01,007 --> 00:19:03,208
- OK.
421
00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:07,012
- Uh, Mr. Wilson, would you
please repeat that title?
422
00:19:07,013 --> 00:19:09,916
- [garbled].
423
00:19:10,016 --> 00:19:12,685
- Did you say something
about the flu?
424
00:19:12,686 --> 00:19:16,555
Oh, are you ill, Mr. Wilson?
425
00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:19,758
{\an8}- (GARBLED) Talk to him.
- Wait a minute, Mister.
426
00:19:19,759 --> 00:19:22,461
{\an8}Mr. Wilson's stuck together.
427
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:24,129
{\an8}- And who is this?
428
00:19:24,130 --> 00:19:25,097
{\an8}- I'm Dennis Mitchell.
429
00:19:25,098 --> 00:19:26,265
- Well, I'm sorry, Dennis.
430
00:19:26,266 --> 00:19:28,735
But Mr. Wilson's
time is about up.
431
00:19:34,741 --> 00:19:36,308
- (GARBLED) I got it.
432
00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:39,678
I got it.
433
00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:40,679
Read this.
434
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,381
- Wait a minute, Mister.
435
00:19:42,382 --> 00:19:45,584
What's that first
word, Mr. Wilson?
436
00:19:45,585 --> 00:19:46,953
- (GARBLED) Sharing.
437
00:19:47,053 --> 00:19:48,955
- I can't read.
438
00:19:49,055 --> 00:19:50,923
- Here I come.
439
00:19:50,924 --> 00:19:55,294
{\an8}I had trouble finding a glass.
440
00:19:55,295 --> 00:19:58,897
{\an8}- He'll be unstuck
in a minute, Mister.
441
00:19:58,898 --> 00:20:00,933
- Ah.
442
00:20:00,934 --> 00:20:02,668
Ahem.
443
00:20:02,669 --> 00:20:03,535
Hello?
444
00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:04,737
[bells]
445
00:20:04,738 --> 00:20:07,674
- I'm sorry, Mr. Wilson,
but your time is up.
446
00:20:10,643 --> 00:20:12,911
- But I know the answer.
447
00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:14,646
- Better luck next time.
448
00:20:14,647 --> 00:20:19,385
The correct title was "Sharing
a Love Seat With You."
449
00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:21,754
- I knew it.
450
00:20:21,755 --> 00:20:25,457
I knew it.
451
00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:28,394
- You sure are having a terrible
day, aren't you, Mr. Wilson?
452
00:20:28,395 --> 00:20:31,196
- Would you like to have
another piece of candy?
453
00:20:31,197 --> 00:20:34,600
{\an8}- Little boy, go home.
454
00:20:34,601 --> 00:20:36,969
{\an8}[crying]
455
00:20:36,970 --> 00:20:40,939
[door bell]
- Hello.
456
00:20:40,940 --> 00:20:44,343
- Hello.
457
00:20:44,344 --> 00:20:46,011
Mr. Wilson, I am Philip Sheldon.
458
00:20:46,012 --> 00:20:48,013
- Oh, Mr. Sheldon, come in.
459
00:20:48,014 --> 00:20:49,415
Come in.
460
00:20:49,416 --> 00:20:49,816
- Thank you.
461
00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:58,824
- Dennis.
462
00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:00,225
Dennis, uh--
463
00:21:00,226 --> 00:21:01,827
- It's all right, Seymour.
464
00:21:01,828 --> 00:21:05,064
I think Mr. Wilson knows him.
465
00:21:05,065 --> 00:21:06,732
- Well, right this
way, Mr. Sheldon.
466
00:21:06,733 --> 00:21:08,067
The collection's
right over here.
467
00:21:08,068 --> 00:21:10,436
Children, if you'll
excuse us, please.
468
00:21:10,437 --> 00:21:12,738
- Come on, then.
469
00:21:12,739 --> 00:21:15,542
We'll be right outside in
case you need us, Mr. Wilson.
470
00:21:19,079 --> 00:21:20,279
- Your children?
471
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:23,182
- Oh, my goodness,
no, Mr. Sheldon.
472
00:21:23,183 --> 00:21:26,085
Now I'm sure that after you've
examined the collection--
473
00:21:26,086 --> 00:21:28,087
- Here you are.
474
00:21:28,088 --> 00:21:29,989
- That's a check for $2,000.
475
00:21:30,090 --> 00:21:31,390
But you haven't even--
476
00:21:31,391 --> 00:21:33,826
- Mr. Wilson, I consider
myself an excellent judge
477
00:21:33,827 --> 00:21:35,094
of character.
478
00:21:35,095 --> 00:21:36,328
I have no doubt
that this collection
479
00:21:36,329 --> 00:21:38,564
is precisely as represented.
480
00:21:38,565 --> 00:21:39,732
- Well, my goodness.
481
00:21:39,733 --> 00:21:41,133
That was fast, wasn't it?
482
00:21:41,134 --> 00:21:44,903
My, my, $2,000.
483
00:21:44,904 --> 00:21:45,904
- Psst.
484
00:21:45,905 --> 00:21:47,173
Psst.
- Yes?
485
00:21:51,177 --> 00:21:53,145
- That doesn't look like
money to me, Mr. Wilson.
486
00:21:53,146 --> 00:21:54,747
- Oh, this isn't money, Dennis.
487
00:21:54,748 --> 00:21:57,383
It's a check for $2,000.
488
00:21:57,384 --> 00:22:02,254
Now, uh, I'll get the collection
together for you, Mr. Sheldon.
489
00:22:02,255 --> 00:22:05,557
- I have an uncle who
writes toy checks.
490
00:22:05,558 --> 00:22:08,394
- Toy checks.
491
00:22:08,395 --> 00:22:10,130
- Dad says they bounce
like a rubber ball.
492
00:22:13,667 --> 00:22:17,403
- What strange
misconceptions children get.
493
00:22:17,404 --> 00:22:20,072
- Well, Tommy, when they
say a check bounces,
494
00:22:20,073 --> 00:22:22,608
that means it isn't any good.
495
00:22:22,609 --> 00:22:23,677
- Jeepers, it does?
496
00:22:27,280 --> 00:22:32,518
Gee, Mr. Wilson, aren't you
even going to drop that check?
497
00:22:32,519 --> 00:22:33,252
- Drop it?
498
00:22:33,253 --> 00:22:35,721
- To see if it bounces?
499
00:22:35,722 --> 00:22:39,491
- I assure you, young man, that
that check is perfectly good.
500
00:22:39,492 --> 00:22:40,893
- Of course it is.
501
00:22:40,894 --> 00:22:44,129
- Then how do you know if you
haven't tried to bounce it?
502
00:22:44,130 --> 00:22:47,433
- Now, Dennis--
actually the proper way
503
00:22:47,434 --> 00:22:50,602
to make sure a check is good
is to call a bank and find out.
504
00:22:50,603 --> 00:22:52,204
And I'm sure that
Mr. Sheldon wouldn't
505
00:22:52,205 --> 00:22:53,906
mind if I do just that.
506
00:22:53,907 --> 00:22:54,840
- Well.
507
00:22:54,841 --> 00:22:56,108
- But Mr. Sheldon, I--
508
00:22:56,109 --> 00:22:57,777
- If that's the way
you feel, good bye.
509
00:23:01,481 --> 00:23:02,748
[door slams]
510
00:23:02,749 --> 00:23:06,852
- But--but Mister-- now look
what you boys made me do.
511
00:23:06,853 --> 00:23:08,087
[dog barking]
512
00:23:08,088 --> 00:23:09,455
- My collection.
513
00:23:09,456 --> 00:23:11,890
Why that scoundrel took
my coin collection.
514
00:23:11,891 --> 00:23:12,891
Oh.
515
00:23:12,892 --> 00:23:19,366
{\an8}[dog barking]
516
00:23:23,503 --> 00:23:26,505
- You see, Mr. Wilson, my
fortune cookie said me
517
00:23:26,506 --> 00:23:29,476
and my friends would keep
you out of trouble today.
518
00:23:39,886 --> 00:23:43,455
the crook didn't get George's
coin collection after all.
519
00:23:43,456 --> 00:23:44,623
- Oh, my goodness.
520
00:23:44,624 --> 00:23:46,825
- Maybe there's something
to these fortune cookies
521
00:23:46,826 --> 00:23:47,793
after all.
522
00:23:47,794 --> 00:23:49,128
- Well, maybe so, Mitchell.
523
00:23:49,129 --> 00:23:51,263
But I still decided
I'm much happier
524
00:23:51,264 --> 00:23:54,133
not knowing what's in
store for me tomorrow.
525
00:23:54,134 --> 00:23:56,201
- Oh, I'm in favor
of them myself.
526
00:23:56,202 --> 00:23:57,970
The one I opened
yesterday got me
527
00:23:57,971 --> 00:24:01,373
a new dress and shoes to match.
528
00:24:01,374 --> 00:24:03,075
- Hi.
529
00:24:03,076 --> 00:24:04,643
Is it time for the
fortune cookies yet?
530
00:24:04,644 --> 00:24:06,578
- I suppose so, dear.
531
00:24:06,579 --> 00:24:09,882
- Say, Mom, is it all right
if I invite a little friend
532
00:24:09,883 --> 00:24:12,084
in to have a fortune cookie too?
533
00:24:12,085 --> 00:24:13,452
- Well, of course
you could, dear.
534
00:24:13,453 --> 00:24:15,854
But I'm afraid there
aren't any left.
535
00:24:15,855 --> 00:24:17,456
- Oh.
536
00:24:17,457 --> 00:24:21,293
Well, Alice, do me a favor and
let Dennis' friend have mine.
537
00:24:21,294 --> 00:24:23,829
- Jeepers.
Thanks, Mr. Wilson.
538
00:24:23,830 --> 00:24:25,364
It's all right.
539
00:24:25,365 --> 00:24:30,703
You can come on in and have
a fortune cookie too, Tiny.
540
00:24:30,704 --> 00:24:33,639
Here, Tiny.
541
00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:36,976
Hey, not the whole cookie.
542
00:24:37,077 --> 00:24:39,912
This is your fortune.
543
00:24:39,913 --> 00:24:42,815
Well, what do you know?
544
00:24:42,816 --> 00:24:44,783
- Well, what does it say?
545
00:24:44,784 --> 00:24:45,951
{\an8}- Beware.
546
00:24:45,952 --> 00:24:49,655
{\an8}You are about to
lead a dog's life.
547
00:24:49,656 --> 00:24:50,990
{\an8}Jeepers, Mr. Wilson.
548
00:24:51,091 --> 00:24:53,493
This fortune cookie
must be meant for you.
549
00:25:02,902 --> 00:25:05,071
[theme music]
550
00:25:43,243 --> 00:25:45,310
{\an8}MALE SPEAKER (OFFSCREEN): This
has been a Screen Gems Film
551
00:25:45,311 --> 00:25:49,582
{\an8}Production from the Hollywood
studios of Columbia Pictures.
38372
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