Original subtitles

So today's session, the 10 things you love about each other.

Theo, you first.

Sure. One, I would rather live with her than a wolf.

Did you say wolf?

Yeah. Wow.

One, he had arms.

Well, I saw a documentary once about a man without arms, and it looked like a

difficult life, particularly for the partner.

I like that he has arms.

Yeah, I am.

I am.

Two, the state of her head is somewhat pleasing.

Three,

I have memories of her being with Heath.

Four, she smells pleasant on occasion.

I actually struggle to write anymore.

Two, his breath smells like an antipode that's been in the pit all night.

Three, the way he laughs is like a diseased dog's death rattle.

Four, his bad father.

A fucked lover, a complete dead shit, a victim, a loser, a wanker. Number 10,

Theo, what a cunt.

That wasn't the task.

Those are things you hate.

It's not funny. That's actually quite funny. I see so much resentment and

defensiveness and an ability to apologize, to share your vulnerability.

These defenses are whiny babies. That's vulnerability.

Verbal cruelty.

In England, we call that repartee. Self -righteousness, mockery, and inability

to admit wrongs. I don't think you have the capacity to fix your problems.

It's terrifying how close we came to losing each other.

Lucky.

Lucky.

Always happy.

Remember when we met.

So I think this is a memorable celebration for all of us.

I think we can be very proud of this building.

Dear God, he actually means it.

Theo, what did you say?

Sorry, I was just remembering how we got rid of the cascading garden balconies

so that we are denying the humans who will be living in these 700 -foot boxes

the chance to engage with fresh air, see a horizon, or maybe decisively embrace

the moment that living in their apartments makes them want to jump. So,

people, when you think about it, we save lives.

To us.

Right. I mean, the balcony thing is actually a good example. I detect a note

bitterness about it, but we all have to grind ourselves and our whims as

architects.

How would you do it?

Do you have a very large knife?

Anyone? I do.

I needed to finish this though.

Well, don't give him credit. It's all me.

Dehydrated blackberry and anthony. I want to put it on there, but the chef

let me.

How can we live like this?

Me, no cascading garden balconies. You, no dehydrated thingy.

Personally, I'm moving to America next week to live free and become a chef.

Maybe I should join you.

We haven't even had sex yet.

A minute's worth.

In the call room, um... Here?

I'm...

There's only right to think about the boy you love and hold on tight.

So I'll be together.

Thank you.

Well, it's not so foggy there anymore. Not since Jack the Ripper died.

Look, try Tower Bridge. So this is licorice, and this is dark chocolate,

raspberry, and this... Don't tell anyone.

Shrimp. A fish!

Depths of flavour without the fishiness. Go try.

Gosh! Gosh, indeed!

Look, I know it's a museum, but it's supposed to represent a sail on a ship,

it should feel like that. You should expect pirates to...

I'm joking.

Look, I want the sale. The question you have to ask yourself is, how do you want

to live your life? With courage or without?

Thank you, and I'll send you the numbers.

Daddy! We're eating British eye color!

Karma meets the Buckingham Palace!

Yes, of course you are.

Let's drink the cheese -sharp bourbon cookie.

Sounds good.

I feel dizzy in my toes. Yeah.

Amazing, of course, for tea.

40 per sucrose.

Don't sugar shame them. But it is bad for their health. They will get fat.

Buddha was fat. He was great. He was great. But don't learn to self -manage.

you restrict things, it leads to a weird affection.

Just say... See? I see a girl learning how to live.

And a great parenting tip for money.

Yes.

Oh, you're fine.

Buddha, you just admit you're wrong.

On the day that I am, I can. But not on the... day i built your building going

to be the eighth wonder of the world here in northern california in raspberry

okay oh my god how did you do that mom you know the way to my ego oh my

god isn't your mummy brilliant of course she is that's a rhetorical question you

aren't agreed i feel good to go then i'm a good colleague you know the way to

make your daddy proud are you ready wait for it

My darling,

most days you're making certain iconic desserts for three people. But the

amazing chef that you are and have always wanted to be... It should not be

dream that dies on a cruise and takes the family life.

Hello, Lavo.

I mean, maybe for a couple of nights a week.

Oh, my God, thank you.

I think that's a yes.

Oh,

and I know what we're going to call it.

You do?

because he won't tonight or have to succumb.

Right. Of course we are.

Bye, Jeffrey. Remember that you love me.

Mm -hmm.

Is he back?

Unclogged by humanity.

Maybe it's the name. How about we've got chlamydia?

Catch it.

So where are we meeting our wonderful American friends?

You're late.

Sorry. We thought you lost the revolutionary award.

Finally, we got you here.

Check this out.

Let's do this, motherfucker.

I'm actually not supposed to do that. Come on.

This is something I will never get used to. It'll be fine.

Anti -gun. I am here ironically.

I am doing this as a statement against guns.

Do you want a Glock?

My father actually killed an intruder with this one. Or I have a beautiful

& Wesson you can use to borrow.

Yes, I think I'll take this black beauty that's going to kill someone.

Actually, I got something.

Here's your 10 years.

I did a couple times. Stop mumbling, babe.

Anyway, we all blow guns.

Everybody's got them, so what are you going to do? You're going to defend

yourself. Okay.

Careful, it's got a hair trigger.

I mean, I really cannot wait to see the building deal. Sally, thank you. It's

the talk of the town.

Canned fuel roads encapsulate our maritime history of steel, concrete, and

You know what? I just might.

I see a man did shout that at us in the street.

I thought it looked crazy beautiful in the design.

Oh, thank you, thank me. I thought it looked a little half -assed and

in its attempt to render California's history in some fun form.

No offense.

Is anyone else getting that?

None taken due to the fact that you are so very, very wrong. I feel that

buildings should be fun and feel temporary and chaotic and alive.

Beautiful and reminded of all that humans can and could be.

I thought very bad.

Oh, my God.

Disagree with all of that, but good luck. I'm excited for you, Theodore.

Jesus, Rory, what's up with you? It's okay. Start getting me home.

Architect to architect.

I'm sorry!

I kind of do that. Yeah, we are excited for you.

You know, when we worked together, I was like, this guy is going to do something

special. How? How did you know?

Maybe after this you will. Good deal.

You're here.

Yes. Good to see you.

Thank you. Thank you.

Oh,

I should get this.

What? What's going to happen here?

Uh, okay.

Oh, oh, God.

Jiminy Cricket, that's pretty serious.

No, we will be, yeah.

We've got to go.

Everything okay? Well, a few years ago in England, we helped in a big con...

was hiding out on the moors. We gave him food, read him sonnets, and then he was

gone. But clearly he's turned up at our home here, and he has a rucksack full of

coke and a sword.

So we'll call you.

Well, let us know if you need help with the coke.

Really? A rucksack full of coke and a sword?

Thank you for lying so badly for me. For you, dear Ellen.

I don't believe that's true.

It really is.

In the East Bay Maritime Museum, architect Theo Rose has created a new

a groundbreaking design that celebrates those sailors who quested into the

unknown. And as they sailed from California into the open sea with

curiosity about what was possible.

But the building has to do the same.

There he is.

Dio!

Amazing building, buddy.

You are about to leave an indelible mark on the Earth.

Oh, man, thank you.

Not everyone does, you know.

Most people just push paper and small talk, have dull effects.

Leave nary a dent.

Makes you wonder.

but the way that the wind catches the sail is whimsical as fuck.

Yeah.

I'm fine.

Hello? People are here.

San Francisco Chronicle food critic is here. That's amazing.

No. Neither is amazing. People are bad.

No, being here is badder.

Are you stoned?

Nah.

My darling, no review can add to this. I don't need another 30 covers a week.

It's actually a good point.

Just cook what you do for me.

I'm trying to make up for you. Yeah.

Yeah, okay.

I love you.

I believe you, but when you do, you kill me.

I mean, that's a nap, nap doll.

I know.

I came when I first got here.

Freak Storm.

Cheap fucking steel, I bet, or something.

I mean, I wanted it to have movement, just not fucking set sail.

I know. Are you sure you're all right?

Hmm? Oh, yeah, yeah.

I'll be fine, you know.

Sorry,

tell me something. I heard you yelling.

Nothing. I can't recall.

Your review. How is it?

It's not clearly worth reading. Not while you're going through this. IV?

This is amazing.

It's just a dumb review. It's the same thing as your thing, my darling. We're

going to be forgotten tomorrow. Today's news, tomorrow's history.

No, mate.

Just saying.

He doesn't really listen through to us.

You're his wife.

And you don't usually mind being rude.

He's crushed and embarrassed, and I don't want to make it worse by making

look bad.

Don't kind of fall.

Don't kind of fall.

I think it might.

Don't kind of fall.

Don't kind of fall.

I think you're coming down.

You said you couldn't go have lunch with the staff. Come on, Dad.

I think it might.

Don't kind of fall.

My God.

Bananas? Yeah, definitely.

Yes, we have no bananas.

We have no bananas today.

Oh, I know. How about Oprah?

Yes, we have no bananas.

The website crashed.

We're booked out for two months.

We could open for more than three days a week.

It's everywhere, like I am a stripper and a conventionist in town.

Service, Jeffrey!

Coming!

Hello!

Hello, Bill. Hi, hey.

Hi, uh, uh, Bob, how you doing?

Yes, I can't tell what was here.

I'm okay, I'm about back.

Don't listen to what he said, okay?

Alright? I'm fine.

It is just a building.

I don't even care.

Is that where you fell down?

Because you didn't care? No, I fucking gave my lifeblood to it. It was

everything to me.

place why are you dirty am i that strange oh i had the car window open

got fired actually and it's suicidal would that make a dormant no you'd still

have me fired you're very busy what's it gonna need now look for a new job are

you all right yeah yeah yeah like my grandma said like cruel but if you

want to be who you are i mean you die in pain thinking solitaire will never come

so you know Maybe my expectations were too high.

Oh, I think it's great.

Are you okay?

Are you really fine?

Yeah. Oh, Theo.

I'm sorry.

Yes, well, no point dwelling on that when you are a huge hit.

You should be dwelling on that.

You needed a rest anyway.

I'm going to get one because no one's going to hire me for a long time.

Maybe I could open more often because the phones are going crazy.

I could do this and pay the bills a bit.

Just a bit. And you could, you could look after the kids.

I could build, build a third house.

I'd love a third house.

Yeah, well, I'm sorry. They're going to get arrested soon.

It'll just take forever.

It's not forever.

Maybe I've been resisting my feelings for too long. What's the problem?

You know what?

and you're the staff uh so i'm not a very high around school person so you

be good okay

fucking male with your your testosterone -filled, ambition -based poison come

jizzing in the face of humanity?

No. No, I do not.

Are you okay?

I think it helps him.

I want to be part of the change.

Come here, my darlings.

We are going to be...

I'm sweating into my balls!

Jane!

Oh!

Sorry.

Obviously, I applaud your passion.

You said, no, it could lead to marriage and children.

There's probably some hygiene bylaw about this. Just nothing else but each

other. Okay.

As you were.

134 covers?

You are a big fucking success.

I really am? You are. I'm gonna make it short.

More people, more money.

I don't think so.

Is there anyone?

No.

We can't.

No way.

What?

We signed the contract with Dad.

He wants a commitment and a contract.

That's true.

He said she'd do this.

We just politely decline.

We politely decline.

What were her commitments?

They're kids. They should be having fun.

Well, working towards the goal is fun. No, ice cream sandwiches at McDonald's

fun.

Not when it's the enemy of the girl.

You can't beat them in dank submissions, quote Bukowski. You're reading Bukowski

to them, by the way. They don't know what the fuck that means. They should be

reading Harry Potter or Dr. Fucking Sooth.

No, touch overwrought. I didn't think I'd have to fight for the well -being of

my children. I thought I could trust you to mould them in a kind and fucking

nurturing way.

Uh, boom. Okay.

Kids!

Hi. You really don't have to keep doing this. It's okay, guys.

We signed a contract.

It's more of a commitment. Yeah, but you don't have to. But then what's the

point of making it?

What does that teach us?

I mean, that's a fucking bad lesson.

Whoa, where's that phone coming from?

I just tried to rate him in on that, and honestly, it sounded fucking cool.

No, it fucking... No, it didn't.

They just take different ways than them.

I miss them.

Well, I could get them to run to the shack tomorrow. They could do with a 12

-mile hit -out.

No, I don't.

They rarely call like you.

Okay, thanks.

But get me off first, and then I can sleep.

Well, you and you. You and you.

Feels good, right?

No!

Pain is just weakness leaving the body.

They're heavenly creatures, really.

Occasionally they might sprout wings and reveal themselves to the angels and

then fly back to heaven.

It's David's time, isn't it?

I think so, yeah.

Wow. You still got more to deal with?

Great.

Oh, God.

It's like a plague.

Can you show me when you find some? Mm -hmm.

How did they die?

Well, the conditioners found them and then I take them off the comb and I

their backs.

That is awesome.

And then I

thought,

what, for permission?

You just want to be the couple who love each other and allow each other to grasp

the chances life gives us, do we?

Yes, rhetorical and instructive. Yes, yes, yes, of course we do, yes.

Sorry, darling, how was your day?

Oh, okay.

Well, the little dog sat in the laundry, the kids have gotten it, and my left

eye is twitching because I'm so freaking tired, I've got a headache. Sorry,

darling, what did you say?

Oh, no, nothing, nothing. You go have fun.

I love you and your big generous heart.

I had so much fun. I can't remember the last time I had fun.

Right, that's always been fun.

Amazing people to talk to. People who do stuff, you know. Think stuff. Amazing

stuff. Just out in the world doing stuff.

Really?

Was that the tone?

No, it's...

Really? You want to do that instead of do me? I also work hard.

And I appreciate it.

Do you?

Yes, I do.

Did you say I appreciate it when I said I've been working my arse off? No. So

the question becomes, do you?

Yes, I appreciate it, darling.

Seems a little lacklustre, like, I don't know, maybe you were bought into it. I

had fun, that's all. Do you begrudge me that?

Glad you had fun. I think all of them.

I've got you these.

out of my way through la russia to get you bob's donuts thoughtless of me i

what a this is a massive victory for you isn't it oh i want

i'm so sorry i'm so sorry it's not

cool not sexy

is

that fine i know it's yours it's jane

Did you get the Bob Donut, that donut ice cream idea? It's brilliant.

Let's have a picture and it's at 10am.

Yeah.

No, they're for you, but the first idea was you and then the second idea was the

ice cream idea.

42,

43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50.

I like their bling.

They literally never take them off.

Why would you? You're a state champion. revel in the glory i say we are so one

day the glory will end however i

gotta say you guys don't think great yeah

very discordant energy right yeah right that was intuitive very good so

how about it yeah what i mean it's great you know

the monster success and that the kids are killing it they won't actually let

themselves stop a workout until they're dizzy and throwing up so that's that's

yeah and i'm actually really loving it yeah but you are

still a failure women don't like that i sense trouble yeah

yeah if you need a shoulder or an inner thigh to lean on

Oh, that's intense, right?

How did they? I don't know.

So, is everything okay?

Yeah, why?

It just seems an undercurrent of discontent between you.

Oh, you could float a boat in that current.

What? Really? Well, I'm so busy, I haven't noticed.

Ivy, you must cherish and nourish a relationship.

Don't you blow random truck drivers in our car park.

And for that ten minutes.

I cherish and I nourish them.

We're fine.

Everybody seems to be... We hate each other?

My undercurrent of discontent with the phrase, but yeah.

Really. Sometimes I do hate you.

Funny. No, seriously.

What? Don't you have that? When your whole body is seized by dizzying waves

fucking hatred?

Really? You don't have that. I thought we all did. Married people. And, you

know, you have to let it go. And it'll pass.

Like a wave crashing somewhere on a beach in the Pacific.

I mean, put aside thinking it personally.

Put aside the dizzying hatred you have for me.

Sporadic dizzying hatred.

You really don't feel like that about me at all?

Well, the other day I could think of Charles Manson inviting me on a picnic.

if you invited me on a picnic, I'd go with Charlie.

Charles Manson.

Yeah, Charles Manson on a good day.

What? jamming with the Beach Boys, say, as opposed to plotting a murderous

rampage, say?

Don't take it personally.

I'm welcome.

Yeah, you're right. I think we both have it.

Right.

Do you think we should go and find out why we have it?

Well, it's normal, though.

Well, how much work?

I mean, I love them, but they are draining the marrow of my fucking soul,

I... I still love us.

Oh, I hate everyone but us. Me too.

I miss you.

I miss you.

We should do something.

Is it run away?

No, kid.

No work.

No. New York.

Just you and me.

I feel giddy at the thought of it.

How are you?

I'm really good, thank you. Yes, how are you?

Amazing. I'm just designing this psychotic new campus for one of the tech

at Silicon Valley. Wow.

Yeah. That's great.

Yeah. You?

I feel like it.

That's cool.

Oh my God. That fucking video.

It's not going to fall. It's not going to fall.

It's so funny. It's so funny.

Do you want another version?

Sure, sure

I'd like two scotches, please. Oh, I heard a noise.

Was there a noise? Are we in danger?

No. Apparently so. Two scotches?

uh distracting me from the humiliation sorry about all that

I think I'm going to

catch up with a golf school that I don't really catch up with.

People go down.

Some get up and some don't. That's when you suddenly go, hey, I've got one of

those who don't get up.

I do get up for our children in the middle of the night and in the morning.

Oh, God, I don't know much about it. It's just a comment.

make a deal of it.

But I am fucking done having it running in the back of our lives.

You failed, so either get over it or go on for good.

And we will do.

Good idea, isn't it?

Yeah, you do that.

I'll try to resist dropping something heavy on you.

Just go and apologize.

I'm an idiot.

I'm in a lot of pressure and slightly unrealistic to expect a person to

perfectly articulate their thoughts in a valid way in the long run.

In a hurry.

Yes, and also philosophical music.

Maybe we should switch back. We always intended to.

You know, I'll go back to work and go back to what you always are doing for

relevant people in the evening and making noise for the sea.

Can you do the job?

Well... I mean, in a neutral, information -seeking way.

Well, I'd have to start at the bottom again, I guess. You know, I can't bear

thought of it, but I will, I might, because that is what I was meant to do.

By the way, I met someone in New York who wants to become an equity partner

open more restaurants like David Chang.

Oh, yeah.

So you don't want this thought back?

As a feminist, I don't.

And as someone who loves their job and is addicted to public aberration, I

don't.

I need this and you need that.

So someone has to sacrifice themselves on the altar of the mayor.

I want

you

to build us the most amazing house ever.

Here? Now?

What about my ego debt for my shitty job and lonely working back and having my

redemption? What about showing the world you're a genius?

And you that I'm not a failure?

You were born to build things.

Can we afford this?

If I do my expansion, we can.

use infections are not an autoimmune disorder.

Well, it's still stung there. The point is, Theo, the zips, you're going to

reset everything, nail it, live happily ever after.

She just wanted to make something worthy of Ivy, you know, so she knows that I

wasn't a massive fucking mistake.

You have a call with him at 4.

Also, I'm sending you this week's house bills. And if I may provide personal

commentary.

Fuck, man. You have to ran him in. I want him to have his shot, I mean.

Oh, fuck!

Exactly.

28 pound for an Irish mask, Theo.

It's to the west side room.

Does America not have masks?

Well, the green is the Irish one.

The green it takes to pay for the iris mask is also something to behold.

Meaning it is integral for the vision.

Do you understand that we do not have unlimited more?

That's me.

which is you didn't even look at them well and i'm trying to talk to you and

you're picking up the phone hi yeah i just told you our budget figures are in

budget figures yeah while you're on budget figures please will you add in

bought us a table from a 15th century spanish monastery it actually has a

embedded in it from the spanish inquisition it's pricey but i think it's

essential

sometimes mom dad do we need milk

hello

mom

i'm coming too okay great um we're doing 2k interval one

first period yesterday.

Oh my darling, are you alright?

I was in a white bathing suit at an open party.

It was more than that.

I stared.

I cried.

Why didn't you call me?

I called Dad.

He was the best.

Oh, the best?

How did you know what to do?

Oh, intuitive parenting.

He googled it.

Alright, you two.

And...

What was that about her period?

It was intense.

She was a wreck, poor thing.

I wish I'd been there.

You never are, are you?

Shut your stupid, stupid mouth.

Hello, darling.

You look beautiful.

Glowing. Yes, I am.

What were you doing?

Free climbing fences to build my light muscles and general focus.

Cool.

You avoiding Dan?

No, of course not. Just having a little moment.

You two need help.

I see.

Time for your protein bath.

I still love you though.

Love you too.

What do you mean you want to abolish it for more money?

That's what I mean. I'm 13 and someone will want to leave home.

I hate the fact I'm old.

David, you're not.

You're all dead.

Well, good, but this isn't the easy bit. Smother me with a pillow.

No.

Settle quickly with my life.

Complete dead shit. A victim, a loser, a wanker. Number 10. Theo, what a cunt.

That was fantastic.

I see so much resentment, self -righteousness, mockery, and inability

wrongs. I don't think you have the capacity to fix your problems.

Are you actually allowed to say that? That seems unprofessional.

Yes, like malpractice. No.

We'll be expecting it.

Time's up.

Oh, really?

Uh, well, that was that one. I do still respect my partner, Melody.

Wow, outrageous.

I'm so proud.

Yours was best, by the way. Darling, yours was second best.

Could be nicer.

Yes, me too.

Don't forget to do that stretching regime I told you after you got off the

plane, please.

Bye. Bye.

Love you.

Bye. Thank you. Thank you.

Yeah, yeah, the nutrition is good.

Well, you know, it's a little bit like being a rabbit at a Las Vegas buffet.

You want to be eating the salad bar first, yes? Correct?

Yes, and then... Sorry, I was thinking like a rabbit, you thought... You've got

to be very careful about your blood sugar.

You can lose your protein and then you can have it again.

Okay, let's open another restaurant.

Oh,

that looks great. You want something?

No, thank you. I've been making out with my Negroni. I think I'll fix that.

Car approaches.

Silver Audi.

New guests.

Still freaking together.

Thanks, pal.

Hal, do you want a Negroni? I don't have one.

Or need.

funny oh i need wow i

love how the living

area provides this kind of gravitational center of the ensemble you guys are

saying words but you know they don't mean anything right you got a shot at

vision view and you nailed it i never thought watching a white man reclaim his

power be so moving.

How are you?

Huh?

Very great. The house, it's so beautiful.

He's a fucking genius.

Why is the stove old and kind of crazy?

It's Julia Child's original stone from France.

I bought it at auction.

It's a fragile beauty.

Wow. That is incredible.

Julia Child.

Yeah. She's dead, right?

And the end wife was kind of mean?

No. You should probably go and join the others because I'm shaving fennel and it

takes a high degree of concentration not to just spread my roots into the

fennel.

That's why the English invented repressing one's inks.

Only when my husband looks at me.

There you go again.

Well,

my friend, you have made what I like to call a very adequate house.

I am flattered.

Sorry to gush. The fact that you'll now be sad every time you walk into your own

home is enough for me. That was the case long before you built this.

Speaking of, how's married life?

Fine.

Why all that bad, huh?

I was hoping the house would be healing.

in its quietly adequate way.

How old is that fucking stove, Steve? Please, just ignore the fucking stove.

Seems a little passive -aggressive, no?

All this beauty, she can set this Julia Child stove in there?

Sometimes a stove is just a stove.

The stove sounds bad, Steve.

It's fine.

Hey, baby.

Can you get me an agrony?

You already have an agrony.

My God, give me two hands.

I thought I was saying you could give me a handjob while enjoying an agrony.

Obviously, I'm joking. She's thinking about the side of my naked body.

I fucking adore you. Is this fair?

These people.

Wait. Okay, please say it again.

Every morning, you'd order a tumbler of whiskey and four kippers and be easily

to the stop. Oh, my God. I love this. It took her a kind of... If you're a Dory

MP, absolutely.

I don't know what that means.

Who cares, Sal? It just sounds so good.

All the time, I'm still falling for that little accent.

It does something to my... Cubs?

Sorry, you know what I'm saying?

Let's do it.

Dinner! Let's eat.

What's my point?

Can I point out the gorgeous wooden elephant in the room?

I love it, too.

I mean, come on.

15th century Spanish monastery. Apparently that dagger was used in the

Inquisition. How cool is that?

This was likely covered in the tortured heretic's blood.

Do you just wake up beaming, Ivy?

I really do. We are very lucky.

So much to be grateful for.

It is an amazing house. And you, my darling. No, to you.

No, to you. No, to you.

You guys are so cute.

Like a sack of kittens.

You're a rotting river.

I don't want that.

Thank you, Ivy, for making all of this possible.

He sounds sarcastic, but he doesn't actually mean it. Yes, it's the accent.

The accent is confusing.

Sometimes Ivy's mad at me and I can't even tell.

Sometimes he's got his cock in me and I can't even tell.

Do a shot of this with a scallop? Yeah, it's Japanese vodka infused with

tarragon. I'd like to see a little bit of herself in everything she does.

I look at some banter you guys do. We should try it, Sally. Come on.

Okay. Why don't you try not fucking me in the ass while you choke me sometimes,

stripper?

You're great.

Whore.

guys are doing, right?

I'm not the expert, Ivy.

I don't have friends.

You know, you gotta get architectural diagnosis here, right?

Thank you, Daddy. I'm not so sure I'm into public approbation

anymore.

Sure.

The kids have been gone for a while now, huh? How has that been?

Hard?

Your kids are college age already?

Oh, no, no, no. They just happen to be very gifted physically, and they won

these scholarships to this school in Miami for high -performance athletes.

At 13? Wow.

Yeah. Their dream.

Is it?

I think I know how you feel, because when we hired that surrogate, and she

pregnant, and then she ate sushi from an airport, and we had to let her go.

I'm very sorry. I'm single.

I don't want to talk. Oh, the grief I felt.

It's still pretty raw for me.

I hear you, baby girl.

So, is that nine restaurants you guys have now?

We are an empire.

And she won the James Beard Award.

It was like a food opera.

It was all through.

I hope we've been lucky. We found a niche in the market, upscale, but not

intimidating. It sort of hits the range of demographics.

We want to move into the South.

A Sherman's March with lots of bits.

Sorry, darling, was the attention off you for a minute? Did you start to wilt?

I think they can't. They will be, my darling. Due to the droning nature of

caustic narcissism.

They're doing it again, and I love it.

Hey, fuckstick bitch, fill my glass. Well, you can't fill my pussy when

tiny, kid.

Whoa.

I don't understand what that just means to me.

Cry like a baby like you did when your dog died, dickhead.

What?

and pass, and I'm having a hard time at this table.

Are you not?

Amy's allergic to weed.

I'm allergic to Amy.

Literally. Wrack on my finger.

Honey, won't you just be nice, please?

You're drunk, and you're being, uh, if I had to define it in one word, a bit of

a bitch.

Of course, darling.

We've done something amazing here.

Let's celebrate this.

Any dessert?

Hal, play Napalm Death.

for you to insert an apology.

For what, darling?

You embarrassed yourself.

Sorry you feel that way. I did it for you, darling.

You were an appalling, needy ball and I created a diversion lest they should

think ill of you.

I shall insert some apologies if you mind me.

You just can't say sorry, can you?

Why did I say I'm sorry you feel that way?

That's not sorry.

One sentence literally contains the word sorry.

You can't say sorry with feeling.

With acknowledgement for pain, pause, or damage.

I'm fucking Ian McKellen. I'm so sorry. My business projects are.

Yeah, well, I know.

Did you try the cake?

Jesus, Theo, it's no big deal. I got drunk at dinner. You stole my fucking

children from me. And now they're gone. You expect me to be happy about this? I

did not.

You our children.

But I did bring them up. You thought they had to be sweaty robots. They can

talk about reps or sodium levels or some shit, and now they've gone.

Yeah, well, you should have thought about that when you were off to work

building your fucking empire, i .e. a shrine for yourself.

I did that to pay for this, your shrine for yourself. It was meant to be ours,

but became yours. That is bullshit, because I was prepared to work my way up

again, and you bribed me with this house to serve the Ivy Show, and you can't

even see what I did for the children.

The doctor's appointments, the dentist's appointments, the dermatologist's. Who

went to the dermatologist?

Fuck, seriously?

No, no, I remember the thing.

The thing? What thing? Whose thing? The thing, the thing that's been related

that... Who, who, who had it, Ivy? I mean, there's two of them. You've got a

-50 chance.

Why? I'm afraid you're out of the game, madam.

Patsy, cracked and bleeding eczema on her toe. Yes, I... What is happening?

You've lost your footing on the cliff of resentment if you realise there is no

factual basis to it. I would have loved to have been the one that did that, is

my point.

You know why I can't say sorry?

Enlighten me. Because you need it too much. You need sorry and praise and

attention and blowjobs and Italian furniture and Irish fucking walls and a

fucking roof. You're a bottomless pit of need.

Are you alright?

I am?

Yep.

What do you mean, I'm alright?

I do need to go get some... I don't think it's going to be... And the

flawed nature of who I am validated as I journey through this life hoping that

one person might see me, love me, and hold me.

You're the wise philosopher and I'm the bitch. Exactly.

And I'm out.

See you.

I'm so sorry.

i'm so sad it just hollowed me out i feel like i've missed half their lives

i don't know what to do without them

i just i think i just

want you to give me a hug or something pathetic like that

her run.

the wrong place, buddy.

Please stop, please, please, please, stop, stop, stop!

Stop!

I wasn't alone.

Are you fucking kidding me?

You're angry because you hate whales?

You didn't tell me.

No. Why not?

You look busy.

Oh, don't play that card. I asked you, how was your run? And you said, fine.

fine. I saved a whale.

I... Tell me why you didn't tell me.

Didn't want you to ruin it.

Because you don't take anything seriously.

And both serious and actually quite spiritual.

Try me. I can be deeply spiritual. I masturbate to Deepak Chopra meditations.

I think you've proved my point. Oh, please.

I know I can be a bit of an arse, but give me a chance.

on this beautiful creature and it was like we were communicating.

I was standing in the water with the whale surrounded by it.

It just felt like everything was one.

Us, the whale, the sea.

rose up inside me.

What was it? This is amazing. This is so you, like the old you.

It was.

You only have one life.

So why the fuck are you with Ivy?

What do you mean?

I've been trying to push it away. I don't want to answer the question, but I

know the answer.

I have to go.

to somewhere where you're not talking. We're done, Ivy.

I fucking say that we're done. Fuck you and your suicidal, attention -seeking

whale friend.

I'm being serious. We are done.

Look at us.

Fine, we're done, but we're done because I decided it, not you.

You're a good lawyer, right?

Yeah. I mean, mostly real estate, but divorce is mostly about real estate.

What's the... You've never done the... Not exactly, but the real estate.

Black.

That's how it is.

Yeah.

How do you and Amy make it work? I don't know.

Inertia. What? I thought you guys were good.

No, we are.

We're good.

And it's like... When we were young...

Feels like I knew what she was going to say before she even said it.

And now, sometimes I don't know what she said even after she said it.

Eleanor, you cannot bring in the dog. It's my emotional support animal.

It's a dangerous dog.

Only when it feels unthreatened.

It's a bullshit tactic and you know it.

Ivy,

is this him?

Yeah, this is him. My name's Theo.

Well, this is a personal assignment, but the fact she ever let you fuck her

would be enough for her to claim every dollar.

Easy. Okay, let me lay it out before this pot bores me to death.

She has been living and supporting this bottom -feeding piece of shit, carrying

his endless fucking failures and needy mommy -help -me anguish for 15 years.

So just agree you'll fuck off now whenever I see you again and she'll

a hundred grand.

Okay.

My thought. How about we take 25 % of the restaurant and the house and we'll

good?

Okay. Look, I just want the house. Don't talk. I don't have a house. Don't talk.

Okay, well, that seems like in our ballpark. Okay, my client designed and

that award -winning fucking house that your sociopathic whorehole of a client

now claims as hers, I see.

Whorehole? Well, I thought the lawyers were being mean. Is that... No?

It's part of the theater. Please don't talk. It's very undermining. Be a little

bit more British about this polite, courteous, rational... Yes, it's not

it's in our blood to pillage, murder, and enslave other cultures to get what

want. Don't talk.

Okay, we want everything. The end.

That's not negotiated.

No, it's winning.

A hundred grand and he walks out of here with his face still attached.

Right, Bruno?

I built it.

That's what I want.

You can have everything. Everything else. I take the house we walk out of

Firmly and surely we can get on with our lives.

We'll take it. No.

No. You want the divorce.

I want you.

the house too. The end.

No! No deal! Bruno, sit and shut up!

So what? We're nowhere.

Looks like it.

Oh, Barry, are you meeting one of the Harvesting Festival? Oh, yeah. Give me a

little bit. I do too.

It's a little bit too much tribal drumming for me because I have tinnitus,

we'll be there. Great. Can we please focus on us?

I'm speaking as your friend now.

Maybe rethink this, guys.

I mean, I know a lot has gone down, but you're great.

You're great together.

I mean, sure, some days it feels horrible and you want to get each other

but some days it doesn't, right?

It's nice to have someone.

My advice would be try to focus on those days.

Nod when you want to shake your head and just say, what the fuck?

And always think of other people when you have sex.

That's standard.

You can make it.

Well, that was just lovely, Barry.

We're still getting the fucking out.

Let's go, Ivy.

Well, I can endure a lot of misery, that's proven.

You have no idea how nice I've been to you. I'm getting the house, Ivy.

I designed it, and I built it. And I pay for it.

Oh, this is a 1907 first edition of Escoffier French Wanker cookbook.

This one I've covered in brownies, so I think the correct term is flambe.

Incoming call from Patty and Roy.

Have you told them? Me neither.

Answer.

Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.

Hi. Hey.

We hear you're getting divorced.

You what?

What

is

that?

Hal, play polka, full volume on loop in room 14. No ideal override.

What door of room 14?

For five hours.

No volume down, Hal.

Ivy, here's an agreement giving me the house. Please sign it.

Full volume, please, Hal.

Sorry, darling, can't hear you.

You okay?

Um... Barry was worried you had to try and destroy each other.

If necessary, I'm hoping she'll see a reason when her ears start bleeding.

Gotta check your energy, excuse me. Mm -hmm.

Sorry.

Oh, that's very dark, Theo. Very dark.

I need it, Amy. I am... What was the house compared to the house that is our

bodies?

Maybe you gotta drive to Mexico.

A friend.

And we take peyote. We drink tequila. And we rub and we rub.

And then we get taco after taco after taco.

Muy caliente.

I have no idea what the metaphor is, but I am not believing it may happen.

Would you really do it?

Barry? Barry?

No, no, no.

I'm looking for one night of strange, okay? So that I can forget that I'm 40

whatever and my face is melting off and my organs are probably growing up a

stage four something as we speak.

But I know who I want driving me to chemo and that's my big dumb stupid

Barry.

Anyway, call me when you get rational.

oh good

you're

awake look i've been teaching myself ai

It's you.

Let me tell you a funny, funny secret.

I deliberately fucked the building up.

I engineered it to come apart like fucking Lego.

People have to learn.

Nothing's solid apart from this rock.

Is that a crack pipe?

It's called deepfake. Isn't it fun?

Also the end of Western civilization.

What are you doing with it? Is that mine? Your phone. Yeah, well said. I'm

to send this to all of your clients.

Captain Smoke the Tooth Bitches, unless you sign the house over to me now.

or so night on. Shame.

You? Got fired by all my clients.

Sweet. That was great.

Stinging metal risotto, just like the one we had in that little place in

Yeah.

this house we can even have nostalgic one -time goodbye sex then admit we had

good run and then went into a ditch which disfigured us and killed our love

that now we're going into a new phase a happier life of synaptism raspberries

yes i laced them in but the taste of cherry masks as well but then again you

have a famously brilliant palette you're allergic

aren't you

It's all in hand, my darling.

Here is the epinephrine that's the solution to your problem.

And here is a fresh new contract signing the house over to me.

We really do need to be apart. It's unbearable.

Simple. Side note, I'll stop you with this. We move on with our lives. I

do think it is the best solution for us. If you die, I inherit the house anyway,

so either way, it's an elegant win -win situation for me.

I'm... I'm the maker.

Just... just... just... just... just...

They're in the dressing room.

You think I know?

Trying to love you has made me faint and distorted because you're a fucking

impossible person. Of course, you had the gut because you're fucking reckless,

Ivy. That's what's good.

Your selfishness, endless late -night drinking with the waiters, fucking

millions of choices that weren't us.

I should have been here watching you masturbate over French tiles while

burnishing your self -image by rebuilding our children in this fucking

Look, you abandoned me. I had to have something.

You never looked happy, Theo.

Sunlight. I'd wait an hour, maybe two, thinking, is he going to look at me?

he fucking want to know who I am?

I don't know who you are. I just didn't have for it anymore.

I didn't even do that one, but it felt like appropriate timing.

Remember, this is a hair trigger. It's very dangerous. I'd need to find a new

thing.

Yes, thank you for reminding me.

Junior child.

Fucking ugly.

we both get something we love I should be the something you love you were you

were fucking everything to me you stopped you're not supposed to stop you

stopped you stopped first I never stopped

No, I meant it.

Why leave me then?

Because you hated me and I couldn't bear it.

I didn't.

You didn't seem to be in enough pain for what had happened to us.

I was.

I am.

It's hard to show it.

Murder -suicide pact, then?

We're so good at words.

We could never find the ones we needed.

I was careless with you.

You were hurt, and I was so lost in my own pain that I couldn't get to you.

I was cruel.

I thought we were impregnable. You were my part of the world. I'm so sorry.

I mean, we nearly... I saw her.

Fucking hell!

If you didn't throw like a wounded toddler.

Or you shoot like a confused mole.

Remember what we meant.

I do.