Original subtitles

ANDY...

HMM?

DID YOU SEE THAT?

SEE WHAT?

LITTERING. I'LL TAKE HIM.

OKAY. I'LL GET SOME COFFEE.

SAY, FELLA!

YOU, UH, NEW HERE, MISTER?

HUH?

WE GOT LAWS IN THIS TOWN.

WELL, I AIN'T DONE NOTHING.

LOOK, I'M IN KIND OF A HURRY.

YOU GOT TIME ENOUGH TO LITTER THE STREETS.

OH, IS THAT ALL?

IS THAT ALL?!

LITTERING'S NOTHING TO BE LAUGHED AT.

YOU LET ONE PERSON LITTER, YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS?

WELL, I... I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENS.

NEXT THING YOU KNOW, EVERYBODY'S LITTERING.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'D BETTER DO?

I'D JUST BETTER WRITE YOU A CITATION.

LOOK, DEPUTY, WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE THIS FIVE BUCKS

AND WE'LL FORGET THE WHOLE THING, OKAY?

ARE YOU TRYING TO BRIBE AN OFFICER OF THE LAW?!

WELL, IT'S ONLY A FIN...

WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE THIS AND LET ME GO?

ALL RIGHT, DROP IT RIGHT HERE!

NICE GOING, DEPUTY. YES, SIR, NICE GOING.

WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT HAPPENED, BARNEY?

YOUR DEPUTY JUST HELPED US NAIL EDDIE BROOKE.

WHAT?!

HE ESCAPED FROM ATLANTA YESTERDAY.

THREE-TIME LOSER DOING 20 YEARS.

WE GOT HERE AS YOUR DEPUTY THREW HIM TO THE GROUND.

HE-HE DID WHAT?

I-I -- UH... BARNEY?

BARNEY, YOU ALL RIGHT?

WHAT HAPPENED?

WELL, THELMA LOU,

YOU CAN BE RIGHT PROUD OF YOUR BOYFRIEND.

YOU SURE CAN. YOU SURE CAN.

HE JUST HELPED CAPTURE AN ESCAPED CRIMINAL.

HE WHAT?!

Andy: HE GOT HIM DOWN SO'S THE TROOPERS COULD TAKE HIM.

BARNEY, HOW... HOW'D IT HAPPEN?

UH, OH, WELL, I-I'M NOT TOO SURE.

SEE, IT ALL HAPPENED SO FAST.

HE-HE BEGAN TO... UH...

ALL RIGHT, BROOKE, LET'S GET MOVING.

GOOD MAN THERE, SHERIFF.

I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, DEPUTY.

BARNEY, I'VE GOT TO HAND IT TO YOU.

THAT BEATS ANYTHING I EVER HEARD OF.

I SAW IT ALL FROM MY STORE.

BARNEY NAILED HIM WITH A FLYING TACKLE.

NOW, WHAT'D YOU DO THEN, BARNEY?

WHAT'D HE DO?

HE CLIPPED HIM WITH A SHORT RIGHT.

WHY, THAT PUNCH DIDN'T GO NO FURTHER THAN A FOOT.

HEY, HEY, IT WAS MORE THAN A PUNCH.

HE MUST HAVE USED SOME OF THAT JUDO.

WHY, THAT FELLA NEVER HAD A CHANCE.

AIN'T THAT RIGHT, BARNEY?

BARNEY, I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.

BUT... BUT YOU COULD HAVE BEEN HURT.

YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN KILLED.

YEAH.

YEAH, BUT THEN AGAIN, HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN HURT.

HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN KILLED.

YOU'RE A REAL HERO, BARNEY. TOOK A LOT OF COURAGE.

WHAT ARE YOU SO SURPRISED ABOUT? THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR.

DEPUTY FIFE, IT LOOKS LIKE TO ME

YOU'VE PUT IN A GOOD DAY'S WORK ALREADY.

HOW'D YOU LIKE TO TAKE THELMA LOU HERE

AND HAVE THE REST OF THE AFTERNOON OFF?

OH, BARNEY, WILL YOU?

WELL, I'D LIKE TO, THELMA LOU, BUT I DON'T GUESS I'D BETTER.

WHY NOT?

WELL, YOU JUST NEVER KNOW WHEN ANOTHER BEAST

MIGHT COME DOWN OUT OF THE FOREST.

YOU UNDERSTAND, DON'T YOU, THELMA LOU?

WELL...

I REALLY DON'T EXPECT YOU TO.

YOU SEE, THELMA LOU...

THIS IS WHAT WE CALL THE DEADLY GAME.

I'M IN IT FOR KEEPS.

YOU START OUT TO GIVE A MAN A TICKET FOR LITTERING

AND NEXT THING I KNOW,

WHY, YOU'RE THE TOAST OF MAYBERRY.

WELL, I'LL ADMIT IT STARTED OUT WITH LITTERING, BUT...

THE MINUTE I SEEN HIM CLOSE UP, I KNEW THIS WAS BIGGER GAME.

OH, YOU DID, HUH?

YEAH, BOY...

HE SEEN ME CLOSING IN, HE MADE HIS MOVE.

AND THAT'S WHEN YOU GOT HIM?

HE NEVER HAD A CHANCE.

HOW'D YOU GET HIM DOWN AGAIN?

I GIVE HIM THE OLD...

BODY BLOCK.

THE OLD BODY BLOCK?

YEAH, THAT'S WHERE YOU MAKE A WEAPON OUT OF YOUR WHOLE BODY.

OH, IS THAT WHAT YOUR BODY IS-- A WEAPON?

WHEN USED CORRECTLY.

YEAH, I TURNED MYSELF INTO AN OBSTACLE.

SUDDENLY, I'M NO LONGER BARNEY FIFE, THE MAN.

I'M BARNEY FIFE, THE BULKHEAD.

I'LL BE DOGGED.

WELL!

MIGHT AS WELL HAVE ME A LOOK AROUND TOWN.

NO TELLING WHAT MIGHT BE COMING UP.

YOU KNOW, ANDY...

I NEVER THOUGHT OUR TOWN WOULD COME TO THIS.

HMPH!

MAYBERRY--

GATEWAY TO DANGER.

HI, BARNEY.

HEY, HERE'S BARNEY.

YOU-ALL HEARD HOW BARNEY CAUGHT THAT CROOK TODAY?

THREW HIMSELF IN FRONT OF HIM AND BLOCKED HIM.

MADE A WEAPON OUT OF MY WHOLE BODY.

HI, PA.

HI, OPE.

HEY, PA, SAY "DRAW!"

DRAW!

OOH.

YOU GOT ME.

YOU MUST BE THE FASTEST GUN IN THE FIRST GRADE.

BARNEY'S BEEN TEACHING ME.

YOU KNOW SOMETHING, PA?

THAT WAS A MIGHTY BRAVE THING HE DONE TODAY,

CATCHING THAT CROOK.

SURE WAS.

PA, YOU SUPPOSE MAYBE BARNEY WAS SCARED JUST A LITTLE BIT?

IT WOULDN'T SURPRISE ME.

A WHOLE LOT OF TIMES,

THAT'S THE WAY A FELLER GETS TO BE A HERO --

BY BEING SCARED ENOUGH TO DO SOMETHING BRAVE.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SCARED, PA?

REALLY SCARED?

YEAH, BOY.

I REMEMBER ONE TIME WHEN I WAS ABOUT YOUR AGE,

I CLIMBED OVER THIS FENCE INTO THIS FARMER'S FIELD,

AND I COME FACE TO FACE WITH A GREAT BIG OLD BULL.

AND HE HAD THE MEANEST DISPOSITION

AND THE LONGEST HORNS.

WHAT'D YOU DO, PA?

OH, I'D SAY ABOUT 60 MILES AN HOUR.

ANYTHING LESS, AND I MIGHT HAVE HAD MY PRIDE PUNCTURED.

OPIE, I'VE BEEN LOOKING ALL OVER FOR YOU.

WE HAVE TO GET YOU SOME NEW JEANS.

AGAIN? THAT BOY GOES THROUGH BRITCHES

LIKE HE'S WEARING SANDPAPER UNDERWEAR.

I KNOW. WHERE'S BARNEY?

HE'S AT THE POST OFFICE.

I HAVEN'T CONGRATULATED HIM YET.

THAT WAS A VERY BRAVE THING HE DID TODAY.

IT SOUNDS KIND OF FRIGHTENING.

IT REALLY WAS.

IT'S THE MOST EXCITING THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO BARNEY.

I'LL BET HE'S SO PROUD.

HE'S GOT REASON TO BE, TOO. I'M PROUD OF HIM.

YOU KNOW, ANDY, A THING LIKE THIS

HAPPENS SO SELDOM.

I THINK WE SHOULD CELEBRATE IN SOME WAY.

WE GONNA HAVE A PARTY, AUNT BEE?

LET'S SURPRISE HIM.

Opie: OH, BOY,

A SURPRISE PARTY!

THAT'S AN OUTSTANDING IDEA, AUNT BEE.

KEEP IT SMALL-- JUST US AND THELMA LOU.

OKAY.

MMM!

ANDY, NOW, STOP IT! STOP IT!

ANDY, NOW, PLEASE!

YOU'RE WORSE THAN OPIE.

WELL, I CAN'T HELP IT.

IT'S GOOD.

HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN HERE TEN MINUTES AGO.

ANDY, ARE YOU SURE...

NOW, THELMA LOU, JUST BE PATIENT.

HE'LL BE HERE. HE'S JUST A FEW MINUTES LATE.

THERE'S THE POLICE CAR.

HE'S HERE! HE'S HERE!

I'LL GET THE LIGHTS.

NOW, MAKE THAT SURPRISE GOOD AND LOUD WHEN HE COMES IN.

COME IN.

SURPRISE! SURPRISE!

OH, UH... HOWDY, BOYS.

WE WAS EXPECTING DEPUTY FIFE.

WHAT ARE YOU-ALL DOING BACK IN TOWN?

WE LOOKED FOR YOU DOWN AT THE COURTHOUSE.

SHERIFF, WE...

WELL, HI, EVERYBODY.

Andy: HI, BARN.

WH-WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

IT'S A SURPRISE PARTY FOR YOU, BARNEY.

FOR ME?

Andy: YEAH.

OH, MY GOSH.

WELL, DID YOU FELLAS COME ALL THE WAY BACK

JUST FOR MY SURPRISE PARTY?

NO, BUT WE DO HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU.

WE WERE HEADED FOR THE CAPITAL

AND WE STOPPED AT A GAS STATION AND BROOKE ESCAPED.

ESCAPED?!

GOT OUT THROUGH A WINDOW IN THE RESTROOM.

Brooke: I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, DEPUTY.

Andy: BARNEY, YOU ALL RIGHT?

HUH?

I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, DEPUTY.

Brooke: ...DEPUTY.

BARNEY!

OH, UH...

HI, THELMA LOU.

UH... I WAS JUST, UH...

PRACTICING MY QUICK DRAW.

BARNEY, I...

I'M WORRIED ABOUT YOU.

WELL, SHUCKS, THELMA LOU

THERE AIN'T NOTHIN' TO BE WORRIED ABOUT.

THERE'S A KILLER ROAMIN' AROUND

WHO SWORE HE'D GET YOU.

BARNEY, I WISH YOU'D DO ME A FAVOR

AND... AND LEAVE TOWN FOR A FEW DAYS.

GOSH, THELMA LOU,

WHAT KIND OF A MAN WOULD I BE

IF I RAN FROM TROUBLE?

A LIVE ONE.

A MAN LIKE BROOKE COULD DO ANYTHING.

COME ON, THELMA LOU.

GIVE THE MAN CREDIT FOR SO INTELLIGENCE.

HE AIN'T GOING TO BE STUPID ENOUGH

TO COME BACK HERE AND TANGLE WITH OL' BARNEY FIFE.

SO, UH... WHY DON'T YOU

JUST RUN ALONG HOME, HUH?

OH, HI, THELMA LOU.

ANDY, I WISH YOU'D MAKE BARNEY GO AWAY

FOR A FEW DAYS.

AW, SHUCKS, THELMA LOU

BARNEY'S GOT THAT FELLA'S NUMBER.

Thelma Lou: YOU SURE?

YEAH.

WELL, ALL RIGHT.

YOU TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, BARNEY.

HELLO. SHERIFF'S OFFICE.

OH, HELLO, CAPTAIN.

YEAH.

YEAH.

WELL, MUCH OBLIGED FOR LETTING US KNOW.

RIGHT, CAPTAIN. BYE.

WHAT WAS THAT?

THAT WAS CAPTAIN ARDELL, STATE POLICE.

A MAN ANSWERING BROOKE'S DESCRIPTION

WAS SEEN HEADED TOWARD MAYBERRY

IN A STOLEN CAR.

BARNEY, MAYBE THELMA LOU HAD SOMETHING

ABOUT YOU LEAVING TOWN FOR A FEW DAYS.

OH, HELLO, JOHNSON, MILLER.

CAPTAIN ARDELL JUST CALLED AND SAID

THEY THINK BROOKE'S HEADED THIS WAY.

WE SAW HIS CAR

ABANDONED BY A LAKE OUTSIDE OF TOWN.

THAT'S IN THATCHER'S WOODS.

THAT'S JUST... THREE MILES FROM HERE.

ARE YOU BOYS WITH US?

UH... SURE THING.

WE'LL WAIT FOR YOU. MAKE IT QUICK.

WELL, BARNEY?

LET'S GO.

LOAD UP.

BREAD AND BUTTER.

SEE ANYTHING, ANDY?

NOT YET.

A LOT OF PLACES A MAN COULD HIDE

AROUND THIS LAKE.

YOU WAIT HERE, BARNEY.

WHERE YOU GOING?

I'M GONNA CLIMB THIS TREE HERE

AND SEE IF I CAN GET A BETTER VIEW FROM THE TOP.

GOOD IDEA. CLIMB THAT TREE

AND SEE IF YOU CAN GET A BETTER VIEW FROM THE TOP.

UH... I THOUGHT

I'D COME UP AND HELP YOU LOOK.

MY EYES ARE 20/20, YOU KNOW.

HEY, BARNEY, WOULD YOU MIND

IF I STOP AND REST A LITTLE WHILE?

I... I'M BUSHED.

YEAH, YOU GO AHEAD.

MAKE IT EASY ON YOURSELF.

I'LL WAIT TILL YOU... GET YOUR SECOND WIND.

OKAY.

SHERIFF TAYLOR CALLING OFFICER JOHNSON.

SHERIFF TAYLOR CALLING OFFICER JOHNSON, OVER.

NO, NARY A THING.

YOU-ALL SPOTTED ANYTHING?

WELL, JUST... JUST KEEP LOOKING.

WE'LL MEET YOU AFTER A WHILE OVER AT THE OLD BARN.

OVER AND OUT.

THEY AIN'T SEEN NOTHIN' EITHER,

NOT EVEN A FOOTPRINT.

IF THAT FELLA'S IN THESE WOODS

HE'S BOUND TO BE SWINGING FROM TREE TO TREE.

WHAT WAS THAT?

HE'S IN THERE, ANDY! I KNOW HE IS!

NOW, JUST TAKE IT EASY, BARNEY.

CAREFUL, ANDY.

HE'S A DANGEROUS KILLER.

I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.

BARNEY, YOU HAD NO IDEA IT WASN'T BROOKE.

I NOTICE YOU DIDN'T DRAW.

WELL...

OH, WHAT'S THE USE OF KIDDING, ANDY?

EVER SINCE I HEARD BROOKE WAS ON THE LOOSE...

BARNEY, IF WE'RE GOING

TO MEET THEM STATE TROOPERS AT THE BARN

WE BETTER GET GOING.

ANDY, YESTERDAY, WHEN I RUN INTO BROOKE...

I HOPE THEY CAN FIND THAT OLD BARN.

WAIT, ANDY, THERE'S SOMETHING I'D LIKE YOU TO KNOW

ABOUT THAT CAPTURE.

AIN'T GOING TO BE MUCH LIGHT LEFT.

ANDY...

YOU COMING, BARNEY?

OKAY.

MILLER, YOU AND BARNEY CHECK

THE CHICKEN HOUSE OVER THERE.

YOU KNOW, I BETTER CHECK THAT LOFT.

UH... JOHNSON.

JOHNSON.

YEAH, SHERIFF?

YOU KNOW, BROOKE'S TOO SMART

TO LET HIMSELF BE TRAPPED IN A BARN.

NOW, WE'VE COVERED THE AREA

FROM THE LAKE UP HERE TO THE BARN.

LET'S CIRCLE ON AROUND

FROM HERE DOWN TO THE HIGHWAY.

I'M SURE GLAD

YOU KNOW THIS PART OF THE COUNTRY, SHERIFF.

WELL, I OUGHT TO.

WHEN I WAS YOUNG I SPENT MORE TIME AROUND HERE

THAN I DID WHEN I WAS AT SCHOOL.

OH, SOMETHING ELSE I'D LIKE TO DO, TOO.

I'D LIKE TO LEAVE MY DEPUTY HERE.

I DON'T GET YOU, SHERIFF.

WELL, IF BROOKE EVER SPOTS BARNEY, LOOK OUT.

AND I CAN'T BLAME HIM.

IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR BARNEY,

YOU ALL MIGHT NOT HAVE CAUGHT BROOKE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

YEAH. WELL, IT'S A GOOD THING HE'S NOT ARMED.

YEAH. COME ON.

LET ME HAVE THAT WALKIE-TALKIE. I'LL GIVE THAT TO BARNEY.

HEY, BARNEY!

YOU WANT ME, ANDY?

HEY, BARNEY, LISTEN. I GOT AN IMPORTANT JOB FOR YOU.

THIS HERE BARN IS GOING TO BE COMMUNICATIONS CENTER

AND YOU'RE IN CHARGE.

OH. WELL, DON'T YOU... DON'T...

DON'T YOU THINK I'D BE MORE HELP

OUT THERE WITH THE FELLAS?

OH, NO. YOU'D BE MUCH MORE VALUABLE RIGHT HERE.

KEEP IN TOUCH, NOW.

UH... DEPUTY FIFE CALLING SHERIFF TAYLOR. OVER.

HI, ANDY.

ANY NEWS?

WELL, YEAH.

YEAH, I KNOW. I KNOW YOU JUST LEFT.

I THOUGHT MAYBE... MAYBE YOU RAN INTO SOMETHING.

UH... 10-4.

DON'T SHOOT! I AIN'T GOT NO GUN!

BARNEY, WHAT'S THE MATTER?

THE DEPUTY GOT HIM.

HE DONE IT AGAIN.

HOW'D YOU DO IT, BARNEY? HOW'D YOU NAIL HIM?

DID HE RUSH YOU? WELL, SAY SOMETHING.

WELL, WHAT'S THE MATTER, BARNEY?

I SWALLOWED MY GUM.

OKAY, BARNEY. I'M SORRY YOU GOT NIGHT DUTY.

OH, THAT'S ALL RIGHT, ANDY.

HEY, DID YOU SEE THE LOOK ON THAT BROOKE'S FACE

WHEN THOSE TWO TROOPERS TOOK HIM AWAY THE SECOND TIME?

YEAH. DON'T FORGET TO PUT THE LATCH ON THE BACK DOOR.

BOY, HE SURE WAS --

I GOT TO GO, BARNEY. GOOD NIGHT.

YEAH. UH...

NIGHT.

Now, make that surprise good and loud.

Ready?

All: SURPRISE!

EASY, TIGER.

IT'S A SURPRISE PARTY, BARNEY!

LOOK AT ALL THIS GOOD STUFF.

HI!

OH, YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THIS.

HEY, WAIT A MINUTE!

WHAT ARE YOU TWO FELLAS DOING HERE?

DON'T TELL ME THAT BROOKE'S ON HIS WAY BACK!

OH, NOT ON YOUR LIFE. NOT WITH OLD TIGER FIFE AROUND.

NOW LET'S HEAR IT FOR BARNEY.

All: * WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH BARNEY? *

* HE'S ALL RIGHT!