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1
00:00:27,720 --> 00:00:29,054
ANDY, AIN'T YOU READY YET?
2
00:00:29,087 --> 00:00:31,757
THAT MEETING'S DUE TO START
IN ABOUT TEN MINUTES.
3
00:00:31,790 --> 00:00:33,391
I'LL BE READY
IN A LITTLE BIT.
4
00:00:33,425 --> 00:00:35,360
WELL, YOU TAKE
LONGER TO GET READY
5
00:00:35,393 --> 00:00:36,862
THAN ANYBODY I EVER KNEW.
6
00:00:36,895 --> 00:00:38,396
WELL, YOU KNOW
HOW IT IS
7
00:00:38,430 --> 00:00:40,165
WHEN YOU'RE
GOOD-LOOKING.
8
00:00:40,198 --> 00:00:43,201
ANDY, I CAN'T UNDERSTAND
ABOUT THIS CANNON BUSINESS.
9
00:00:43,235 --> 00:00:45,070
I JUST CAN'T
UNDERSTAND IT.
10
00:00:45,103 --> 00:00:47,305
OH, BARNEY, YOU
CAN'T FIGHT PROGRESS.
11
00:00:47,339 --> 00:00:48,941
WHY DO THEY WANT
TO GET RID OF SOMETHING
12
00:00:48,974 --> 00:00:50,408
THAT'S BECOME A LANDMARK
IN MAYBERRY?
13
00:00:50,442 --> 00:00:54,246
OH, THAT OLD CANNON'S GETTING
TO BE AN EYESORE.
14
00:00:54,279 --> 00:00:57,115
IT'S ALL RUSTY
AND CHIPPING AWAY.
15
00:00:57,149 --> 00:01:00,385
I KNOW, BUT I'M USED
TO SEEING IT THERE.
16
00:01:00,418 --> 00:01:03,055
I GOT A GOOD MIND
TO VOTE TO KEEP IT.
17
00:01:03,088 --> 00:01:04,823
FINE. YOU VOTE ANY
WAY YOU WANT TO.
18
00:01:04,857 --> 00:01:06,224
THAT'S WHAT THE
MEETING'S FOR.
19
00:01:06,258 --> 00:01:07,860
SO EVERYBODY CAN
DECIDE ON WHAT
20
00:01:07,893 --> 00:01:09,094
THEY WANT TO
DO WITH IT.
21
00:01:09,127 --> 00:01:10,729
WELL, THAT'S WHAT
I'M GOING TO DO.
22
00:01:10,763 --> 00:01:12,030
I'M GOING TO VOTE
TO KEEP IT.
23
00:01:12,064 --> 00:01:13,331
ALL RIGHT.
24
00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:16,935
YES. GONNA VOTE
TO KEEP IT.
25
00:01:16,969 --> 00:01:20,372
YOU DON'T LIKE
CHANGE, DO YOU?
26
00:01:20,405 --> 00:01:22,140
AS A MATTER OF FACT,
I DON'T.
27
00:01:22,174 --> 00:01:24,009
LITTLE BIT CONSERVATIVE
THERE, ARE YOU?
28
00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:25,510
WELL, WHAT'S THE MATTER
WITH THAT?
29
00:01:25,543 --> 00:01:27,045
NOTHING. I JUST
NOTICED THAT
30
00:01:27,079 --> 00:01:28,847
YOU LIKE FOR THINGS
TO STAY THE SAME.
31
00:01:28,881 --> 00:01:30,983
WELL, LOTS OF PEOPLE
ARE LIKE THAT.
32
00:01:31,016 --> 00:01:32,985
I JUST HAPPEN
TO BE ONE OF THEM,
33
00:01:33,018 --> 00:01:34,219
THAT'S ALL.
34
00:01:34,252 --> 00:01:36,054
I LIKE THINGS TO STAY
THE WAY THEY ARE
35
00:01:36,088 --> 00:01:38,290
AND IF SOMETHING HAPPENS
TO CHANGE IT,
36
00:01:38,323 --> 00:01:39,925
WELL, IT-IT UPSETS ME.
37
00:01:39,958 --> 00:01:41,493
IT DOES?
YES, IT DOES.
38
00:01:41,526 --> 00:01:44,362
WHEN THEY PUT THAT STAMP MACHINE
IN THE POST OFFICE
39
00:01:44,396 --> 00:01:45,798
THAT JUST FROSTED ME.
40
00:01:45,831 --> 00:01:48,300
THAT BOTHERED YOU, DID IT?
YES, IT DID.
41
00:01:48,333 --> 00:01:50,969
I DON'T THINK IT'S RIGHT
FOR THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT
42
00:01:51,003 --> 00:01:53,205
TO BE TRANSACTING BUSINESS
THROUGH A SLOT MACHINE.
43
00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:55,841
I SAT DOWN AND WROTE A LETTER
TO THE POSTMASTER GENERAL.
44
00:01:55,874 --> 00:01:56,809
OH, YOU DID?
45
00:01:56,842 --> 00:01:58,110
YES, I DID.
46
00:01:58,143 --> 00:02:00,946
I DIDN'T MAIL IT, THOUGH.
WHY DIDN'T YOU?
47
00:02:00,979 --> 00:02:03,481
I WOULDN'T BUY A STAMP
FROM THAT MACHINE.
48
00:02:03,515 --> 00:02:04,950
[ CHUCKLING ]
49
00:02:04,983 --> 00:02:08,020
BARNEY, I'LL TELL
YOU THE TRUTH.
50
00:02:08,053 --> 00:02:10,923
YOU ARE A BIRD
IN THIS WORLD.
51
00:02:10,956 --> 00:02:12,157
THAT MAY BE,
BUT I'LL TELL YOU
52
00:02:12,190 --> 00:02:13,058
HOW I'M GONNA VOTE
ON THAT CANNON.
53
00:02:13,091 --> 00:02:14,226
HOW?
54
00:02:14,259 --> 00:02:15,327
I'M GOING TO VOTE
TO KEEP IT.
55
00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:16,528
YOU JUST DO THAT.
56
00:02:16,561 --> 00:02:18,430
I DON'T KNOW HOW
YOU'RE GOING TO VOTE
57
00:02:18,463 --> 00:02:20,165
BUT I KNOW HOW
I'M GOING TO VOTE.
58
00:02:20,198 --> 00:02:21,166
HI, PA.
59
00:02:21,199 --> 00:02:22,300
OH, HI, SON.
60
00:02:22,334 --> 00:02:24,236
CAN I LEAVE
MY SCHOOL BOOKS HERE?
61
00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:26,538
I'M GOING OVER
TO JERRY PARKER'S HOUSE,
62
00:02:26,571 --> 00:02:28,106
AND I'LL BE SKATING BACK.
63
00:02:28,140 --> 00:02:29,975
WELL, WAIT,
WAIT, WAIT, NOW.
64
00:02:30,008 --> 00:02:31,509
HOW YOU GOING TO
BE SKATING BACK
65
00:02:31,543 --> 00:02:33,311
WHEN YOU DON'T
HAVE ANY SKATES?
66
00:02:33,345 --> 00:02:34,947
WELL, I'M GONNA GET 'EM.
67
00:02:34,980 --> 00:02:37,149
JERRY AND ME
ARE MAKING A TRADE --
68
00:02:37,182 --> 00:02:39,584
HIS ROLLER SKATES
FOR MY LICORICE SEEDS.
69
00:02:39,617 --> 00:02:40,886
YOUR WHAT?
70
00:02:40,919 --> 00:02:42,520
HIS LICORICE SEEDS.
71
00:02:42,554 --> 00:02:44,823
WHAT ARE LICORICE SEEDS?
72
00:02:44,857 --> 00:02:47,192
AND WHERE'D
YOU GET 'EM?
73
00:02:47,225 --> 00:02:49,895
ON ANOTHER TRADE
WITH TOMMY FARRELL.
74
00:02:49,928 --> 00:02:51,463
I GAVE HIM MY CAP PISTOL.
75
00:02:51,496 --> 00:02:53,198
YOUR NEW ONE?
76
00:02:53,231 --> 00:02:56,334
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN WORTH IT
TO GROW MY OWN LICORICE STICKS.
77
00:02:56,368 --> 00:02:58,904
YOU WERE GONNA GROW
LICORICE STICKS?
78
00:02:58,937 --> 00:03:00,906
YEAH, BUT IT WAS A FAKE.
79
00:03:00,939 --> 00:03:03,942
I PLANTED 'EM,
AND NOTHING CAME UP.
80
00:03:03,976 --> 00:03:07,145
YOU KNOW, PA,
I THINK TOMMY CHEATED ME.
81
00:03:07,179 --> 00:03:08,380
[ CHUCKLES ]
82
00:03:08,413 --> 00:03:11,917
YEAH, I'D SAY
THAT SUMS IT UP PRETTY GOOD.
83
00:03:11,950 --> 00:03:14,987
AND SO NOW,
YOU'RE GONNA PAWN 'EM OFF
84
00:03:15,020 --> 00:03:16,454
ON THE NEXT FELLOW?
85
00:03:16,488 --> 00:03:18,290
AND ON A BETTER TRADE, TOO.
86
00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:21,393
ROLLER SKATES ARE TWICE AS GOOD
AS A CAP PISTOL.
87
00:03:21,426 --> 00:03:25,363
UH, LET ME, LET ME TELL
YOU SOMETHING HERE.
88
00:03:25,397 --> 00:03:29,167
UH, YOU KNOW
THAT YOU'VE
BEEN TAUGHT
89
00:03:29,201 --> 00:03:30,903
THE GOLDEN RULE --
90
00:03:30,936 --> 00:03:34,139
"DO UNTO OTHERS
AS YOU WOULD HAVE
THEM DO UNTO YOU"?
91
00:03:34,172 --> 00:03:35,407
YES, PA.
92
00:03:35,440 --> 00:03:37,542
YOU THINK YOU'VE
BEEN FOLLOWING
THAT RULE?
93
00:03:37,575 --> 00:03:41,980
SURE. TOMMY DID IT UNTO ME,
AND NOW I'M DOING IT UNTO JERRY.
94
00:03:42,014 --> 00:03:47,285
UH, I-I BELIEVE YOU'RE BENDING
THAT RULE JUST A LITTLE BIT.
95
00:03:47,319 --> 00:03:49,621
NOW, THE GOLDEN RULE SAYS
96
00:03:49,654 --> 00:03:52,257
THAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE
HONEST AND SQUARE DEALING
97
00:03:52,290 --> 00:03:53,391
WITH OTHER FOLKS.
98
00:03:53,425 --> 00:03:54,960
NOW, TELLIN' YOUR FRIENDS
99
00:03:54,993 --> 00:03:56,995
THAT THEM SEEDS IS GONNA GROW
LICORICE STICKS,
100
00:03:57,029 --> 00:03:58,396
WELL, THAT'S KIND OF FAR AWAY
101
00:03:58,430 --> 00:04:00,465
FROM WHAT YOU'D CALL
SQUARE DEALING,
102
00:04:00,498 --> 00:04:03,168
AND IT'S AWFUL CLOSE
TO WHAT YOU'D CALL CHEATING.
103
00:04:03,201 --> 00:04:06,138
I DIDN'T TELL HIM THAT THEY GROW
LICORICE STICKS, PA.
104
00:04:06,171 --> 00:04:08,273
I JUST DIDN'T TELL HIM
THEY WOULDN'T.
105
00:04:13,678 --> 00:04:16,148
WELL, I GOT CHEATED.
106
00:04:16,181 --> 00:04:18,450
WELL, NOW, THAT STILL
DON'T MAKE IT RIGHT,
107
00:04:18,483 --> 00:04:20,585
AND I KNOW
THAT YOU WOULDN'T FEEL GOOD
108
00:04:20,618 --> 00:04:21,954
CHEATING YOUR FRIEND.
109
00:04:21,987 --> 00:04:23,521
NOW, I-I'LL TELL YOU WHAT TO DO.
110
00:04:23,555 --> 00:04:25,657
NOW, YOU JUST KEEP
THEM LICORICE SEEDS
111
00:04:25,690 --> 00:04:27,259
AND FORGET THIS WHOLE TRADE
112
00:04:27,292 --> 00:04:29,261
UNTIL YOU GOT
SOMETHING WORTHWHILE
113
00:04:29,294 --> 00:04:30,595
TO DICKER WITH, ALL RIGHT?
114
00:04:30,628 --> 00:04:33,365
ALL RIGHT. NOW JUST
ALWAYS REMEMBER
115
00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:35,533
HONESTY IS THE
BEST POLICY.
116
00:04:35,567 --> 00:04:38,170
YOU JUST LISTEN
TO YOUR PA, SON.
117
00:04:38,203 --> 00:04:40,505
YOU'LL NEVER
GO WRONG ON THAT.
118
00:04:40,538 --> 00:04:43,041
ALL RIGHT, WE'LL
SEE YOU, OPIE.
119
00:04:48,981 --> 00:04:52,517
IF HONESTY
IS SUCH A GOOD POLICY,
120
00:04:52,550 --> 00:04:55,520
HOW COME I'M OUT A CAP PISTOL?
121
00:04:59,624 --> 00:05:01,259
WAIT A MINUTE!
122
00:05:01,293 --> 00:05:03,161
BARNEY, WILL YOU
WAIT A MINUTE?
123
00:05:03,195 --> 00:05:05,330
YOU DON'T HAVE THE FLOOR.
SHERIFF TAYLOR DOES.
124
00:05:05,363 --> 00:05:06,965
I JUST THOUGHT
YOU'D LIKE TO KNOW
125
00:05:06,999 --> 00:05:08,633
HOW I'M GONNA VOTE
ON THE CANNON QUESTION.
126
00:05:08,666 --> 00:05:10,368
WE'RE NOT GONNA HAVE
ANY VOTING
127
00:05:10,402 --> 00:05:12,270
TILL WE FINISH
WITH THE DISCUSSION.
128
00:05:12,304 --> 00:05:13,471
NOW, IS THAT CLEAR?
YES, SIR.
129
00:05:13,505 --> 00:05:15,073
WELL, GO ON THEN, ANDY.
130
00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:17,375
AS SOON AS WE DO VOTE,
WANNA KNOW HOW I'M GONNA VOTE?
131
00:05:17,409 --> 00:05:19,111
NO! NOW, GO AHEAD, ANDY.
132
00:05:19,144 --> 00:05:21,079
YOU WANNA KNOW
HOW I'M GONNA VOTE?
133
00:05:21,113 --> 00:05:22,180
BARNEY!
134
00:05:22,214 --> 00:05:23,681
I'M GONNA VOTE
TO KEEP IT.
SHH.
135
00:05:23,715 --> 00:05:26,284
WELL, SHE JUST WANTED TO KNOW
HOW I WAS GONNA VOTE.
136
00:05:26,318 --> 00:05:27,285
MISS WALKER!
137
00:05:27,319 --> 00:05:28,286
I DIDN'T...
138
00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:29,287
BARNEY!
139
00:05:29,321 --> 00:05:32,557
SHH.
140
00:05:32,590 --> 00:05:35,227
WELL, ALL I WAS
TRYIN' TO SAY IS THAT
141
00:05:35,260 --> 00:05:38,030
THE CANNON NEVER WAS
IN SUCH GOOD SHAPE
142
00:05:38,063 --> 00:05:40,165
AND YOU REMEMBER AFTER
LAST FOURTH OF JULY
143
00:05:40,198 --> 00:05:41,433
IT DIDN'T GET ANY BETTER
144
00:05:41,466 --> 00:05:43,635
WHEN WE BUSTED THE MUZZLE
TRYING TO FIRE IT.
145
00:05:43,668 --> 00:05:45,370
LET'S GET ON
WITH THE VOTING.
146
00:05:45,403 --> 00:05:47,172
WE'RE NOT READY
FOR THE VOTING.
147
00:05:47,205 --> 00:05:49,574
WE HAVEN'T HAD ANY DISCUSSION
ON THE PLAQUE YET.
148
00:05:49,607 --> 00:05:51,076
WHAT PLAQUE?
149
00:05:51,109 --> 00:05:52,644
THE PLAQUE THAT
WOULD REPLACE
OUR CANNON.
150
00:05:52,677 --> 00:05:54,612
YES, ONE OF
OUR FORMER CITIZENS --
151
00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:56,048
MR. MILFORD PHILIPS --
152
00:05:56,081 --> 00:05:58,316
HAS GENEROUSLY OFFERED
TO DONATE IT TO US.
153
00:05:58,350 --> 00:05:59,551
MILFORD PHILIPS?
154
00:05:59,584 --> 00:06:00,552
YES.
155
00:06:00,585 --> 00:06:02,120
HE STILL HAS FOND MEMORY
156
00:06:02,154 --> 00:06:03,321
FOR HIS BOYHOOD DAYS
157
00:06:03,355 --> 00:06:05,257
HERE IN THIS
SPLENDID COMMUNITY.
158
00:06:05,290 --> 00:06:08,160
WELL, I GUESS WE'VE HAD
ABOUT ENOUGH DISCUSSION.
159
00:06:08,193 --> 00:06:09,661
LET'S GET ON
WITH THE VOTING.
160
00:06:09,694 --> 00:06:12,597
NOW THEN, ALL THOSE IN FAVOR
OF GETTING RID OF THE CANNON,
161
00:06:12,630 --> 00:06:13,631
RAISE THEIR HANDS.
162
00:06:13,665 --> 00:06:14,632
MOTION CARRIED.
163
00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,034
WAIT JUST A SECOND.
164
00:06:16,068 --> 00:06:18,170
YOU DIDN'T ASK
FOR THOSE AGAINST.
165
00:06:18,203 --> 00:06:20,238
BARNEY,
THE MAJORITY RULES.
166
00:06:20,272 --> 00:06:21,539
I DON'T CARE.
167
00:06:21,573 --> 00:06:24,409
HE'S SUPPOSED TO GET A
COUNT ON THOSE AGAINST.
168
00:06:24,442 --> 00:06:25,810
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
169
00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:29,013
NOW, ALL THOSE AGAINST IT,
RAISE THEIR HAND.
170
00:06:31,083 --> 00:06:32,717
WELL, WHY DON'T YOU
RAISE YOUR HAND?
171
00:06:32,750 --> 00:06:36,554
THINK I WANNA GO ON RECORD
AS A TROUBLEMAKER?
172
00:06:36,588 --> 00:06:38,523
THE MOTION
WAS CARRIED UNANIMOUSLY.
173
00:06:38,556 --> 00:06:39,557
MEETING ADJOURNED.
174
00:06:39,591 --> 00:06:40,558
WAIT A MINUTE, MAYOR.
175
00:06:40,592 --> 00:06:41,593
WELL, WHAT FOR?
176
00:06:41,626 --> 00:06:42,594
WE DIDN'T DECIDE
177
00:06:42,627 --> 00:06:44,196
WHAT TO DO WITH THE CANNON.
178
00:06:44,229 --> 00:06:45,197
WELL, THAT'S SO.
179
00:06:45,230 --> 00:06:46,631
WE GOTTA MAKE SOME DECISION.
180
00:06:46,664 --> 00:06:49,634
WHY NOT DONATE IT
TO THE STATE MUSEUM?
181
00:06:49,667 --> 00:06:51,103
YEAH, STATE MUSEUM.
182
00:06:51,136 --> 00:06:52,370
THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
183
00:06:52,404 --> 00:06:55,073
THAT SAD-LOOKIN' THING
IN THE STATE MUSEUM?
184
00:06:55,107 --> 00:06:58,110
NO, STATE MUSEUM, NO GOOD.
BAD IDEA.
185
00:06:58,143 --> 00:07:00,612
YOU WERE ALL ANXIOUS
TO GET RID OF IT, WEREN'T YOU?
186
00:07:00,645 --> 00:07:03,148
NOW YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO DO WITH IT, DO YOU?
187
00:07:03,181 --> 00:07:06,251
SIMPLE-- YOU JUST...
188
00:07:06,284 --> 00:07:07,185
SELL IT.
189
00:07:07,219 --> 00:07:08,386
THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
190
00:07:08,420 --> 00:07:10,722
Andy: WE COULD SELL IT
AT AUCTION.
191
00:07:10,755 --> 00:07:12,457
ANDY, I APPOINT YOU AND BARNEY
192
00:07:12,490 --> 00:07:14,559
AS A COMMITTEE OF TWO
TO SELL THE CANNON.
193
00:07:14,592 --> 00:07:15,560
BUT, MAYOR...
194
00:07:15,593 --> 00:07:17,095
MEETING'S ADJOURNED.
195
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:23,201
BARNEY, THAT WAS
WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL.
196
00:07:23,235 --> 00:07:25,270
GLAD YOU VOTED
MY WAY, BARNEY.
197
00:07:33,445 --> 00:07:34,679
WELL, BUCKET MOUTH...
198
00:07:34,712 --> 00:07:37,349
YOU KNOW ANYBODY
WHO WANTS TO BUY A CANNON?
199
00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:10,848
[ PATRIOTIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
200
00:09:06,971 --> 00:09:10,208
RIGHT HERE'LL BE GOOD.
201
00:09:12,810 --> 00:09:15,847
WHOOP. THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH
RIGHT THERE.
202
00:09:18,750 --> 00:09:21,753
WELL, WE DIDN'T HAVE MUCH LUCK
TRYING TO SELL IT, DID WE?
203
00:09:21,786 --> 00:09:23,355
MIGHT AS WELL
JUST FORGET IT.
204
00:09:23,388 --> 00:09:27,559
OH, ANDY, SOMEBODY'S
BOUND TO COME ALONG.
205
00:09:27,592 --> 00:09:29,694
THERE MUST BE SOMEONE
WHO'D LIKE TO OWN
206
00:09:29,727 --> 00:09:31,796
THIS FUNNY-LOOKING PIECE
OF ARTILLERY.
207
00:09:31,829 --> 00:09:33,665
WE'LL FIND
A GOOD PLACE FOR IT.
208
00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:36,501
DON'T SAY "FORGET IT."
209
00:09:43,908 --> 00:09:45,743
UH, BARNEY?
210
00:09:45,777 --> 00:09:47,412
YEAH?
211
00:09:47,445 --> 00:09:49,981
YOU KNOW, I BELIEVE
I KNOW SOMEBODY
212
00:09:50,014 --> 00:09:53,285
THAT WOULD BE TO DEATH
TO BUY THIS CANNON.
213
00:09:53,318 --> 00:09:54,452
YOU DO?
YEAH.
214
00:09:54,486 --> 00:09:55,453
FOR SURE?
YEAH.
215
00:09:55,487 --> 00:09:56,454
HERE?
YEAH.
216
00:09:56,488 --> 00:09:57,455
WHO?
YOU.
217
00:09:57,489 --> 00:09:58,456
ME?
YEAH.
218
00:09:58,490 --> 00:09:59,957
FORGET IT!
219
00:09:59,991 --> 00:10:02,360
OH, ANDY, YOU TRYING
TO SELL ME THIS CANNON?
220
00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:04,929
WHAT WOULD I DO WITH A CANNON,
FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES?
221
00:10:04,962 --> 00:10:06,564
WELL,
YOU SEEM TO LOVE IT.
222
00:10:06,598 --> 00:10:08,633
LOVE IT?
223
00:10:08,666 --> 00:10:10,335
WELL, NO.
224
00:10:10,368 --> 00:10:12,537
I MEAN, WELL, I...
225
00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:14,672
I LIKE IT, BUT I...
226
00:10:14,706 --> 00:10:16,974
I DON'T LOVE IT.
227
00:10:17,008 --> 00:10:19,677
WELL, BARNEY, WOULDN'T YOU
LIKE TO OWN THIS CANNON
228
00:10:19,711 --> 00:10:21,646
AND KEEP IT RIGHT IN FRONT
OF YOUR HOUSE?
229
00:10:21,679 --> 00:10:23,315
FRONT OF MY HOUSE?
THAT'S RIGHT.
230
00:10:23,348 --> 00:10:25,450
AND THAT WAY YOUR PLACE'D GET
TO BE KIND OF A LANDMARK.
231
00:10:25,483 --> 00:10:27,452
SORT OF A TOURIST SPOT.
THAT'S IT.
232
00:10:27,485 --> 00:10:29,053
THEN FOLKS WOULD COME
FROM ALL OVER
233
00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:31,356
AND JUST STAND IN MY FRONT YARD
AND STARE AT MY CANNON.
234
00:10:31,389 --> 00:10:33,625
THAT'S RIGHT.
AND YOUNG ONES
WOULD PLAY ON IT.
235
00:10:33,658 --> 00:10:34,992
YEAH.
WHAT DO YOU SAY, BARNEY?
236
00:10:35,026 --> 00:10:37,529
FORGET IT!
BUT, BARNEY --
237
00:10:37,562 --> 00:10:39,997
YOU GOT A LOT OF NERVE
TRYING TO SELL ME A CANNON!
238
00:10:40,031 --> 00:10:42,367
WHAT KIND OF A DUMBBELL
DO YOU THINK I AM?
239
00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:43,935
YOU BEAT EVERYTHING,
YOU KNOW THAT?
240
00:10:45,770 --> 00:10:47,672
WELL...GOLLY, BARNEY.
241
00:10:47,705 --> 00:10:51,776
I WAS JUST DOING WHAT THE MAYOR
ASKED US TO DO.
242
00:10:51,809 --> 00:10:54,912
I DIDN'T THINK IT'D BE
ANY HARM IN ASKING.
243
00:10:54,946 --> 00:10:59,317
YOU LIKE THE CANNON,
AND, WELL, SHUCKS --
244
00:10:59,351 --> 00:11:02,487
I MEAN, I DIDN'T THINK
IT'D BE ANY HARM IN ASKING.
245
00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:04,822
WELL, I-I'M SORRY, ANDY.
246
00:11:04,856 --> 00:11:07,024
I DIDN'T MEAN
TO GET RILED.
247
00:11:07,058 --> 00:11:11,496
I-I-I KNOW YOU WAS DOING
WHAT YOU THOUGHT WAS RIGHT.
248
00:11:11,529 --> 00:11:14,599
WELL, OF COURSE THERE'S
NO HARM IN ASKING.
249
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:17,535
AND...I'M NOT MAD...
250
00:11:17,569 --> 00:11:18,970
BUDDY.
251
00:11:20,137 --> 00:11:21,439
NO?
252
00:11:21,473 --> 00:11:22,340
NO.
253
00:11:22,374 --> 00:11:23,608
WANT TO BUY A CANNON?
254
00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:24,909
FORGET IT!
255
00:11:38,055 --> 00:11:39,323
OH...
256
00:11:40,625 --> 00:11:41,859
HELLO.
257
00:11:41,893 --> 00:11:43,461
NO LUCK?
258
00:11:43,495 --> 00:11:44,462
NARY A NIBBLE.
259
00:11:44,496 --> 00:11:45,830
I DON'T BELIEVE
260
00:11:45,863 --> 00:11:47,365
THERE'S A VERY BRISK MARKET
FOR CANNONS THIS YEAR.
261
00:11:47,399 --> 00:11:48,633
OH, THAT'S TOO BAD.
262
00:11:48,666 --> 00:11:51,803
I DO HAVE BARNEY
FOLLOWING UP ONE LAST LEAD.
263
00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,705
MIGHT AMOUNT TO SOMETHING.
264
00:11:53,738 --> 00:11:55,940
I SURE COULD USE
A COOL DRINK.
265
00:11:55,973 --> 00:11:57,108
OKAY.
266
00:11:57,141 --> 00:11:59,611
CANNON-SELLING
PARCHES A BODY'S THROAT.
267
00:11:59,644 --> 00:12:01,713
I DON'T KNOW
HOW MANY MILES WE WENT TODAY,
268
00:12:01,746 --> 00:12:02,980
BUT I TELL YOU THE TRUTH,
269
00:12:03,014 --> 00:12:03,981
I SURE AM
WORE OUT.
270
00:12:04,015 --> 00:12:04,982
HI, PA.
271
00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:05,983
WELL, HI, OP.
272
00:12:06,017 --> 00:12:07,084
HI, MISS ELLIE.
273
00:12:07,118 --> 00:12:08,853
CAN I HAVE
SOME, TOO?
274
00:12:08,886 --> 00:12:09,954
OH, I GUESS SO.
275
00:12:09,987 --> 00:12:11,889
MISS ELLIE,
ONE MORE STRAW.
276
00:12:11,923 --> 00:12:12,890
ALL RIGHT.
277
00:12:12,924 --> 00:12:14,692
HOW WAS SCHOOL
TODAY, OPIE?
278
00:12:14,726 --> 00:12:16,894
[ MUMBLING AND SLURPING ]
279
00:12:16,928 --> 00:12:18,563
I'LL ACCEPT THAT.
280
00:12:18,596 --> 00:12:20,432
Barney:
OH, THERE YOU ARE, ANDY.
281
00:12:20,465 --> 00:12:21,499
OH, HI, BARNEY.
282
00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,435
I GOT AN OFFER
FROM CHARLIE ROSS.
283
00:12:23,468 --> 00:12:24,902
CHARLIE ROSS,
THE JUNK DEALER?
284
00:12:24,936 --> 00:12:26,838
THAT'S THE
ONLY PROSPECT
WE HAD LEFT.
285
00:12:26,871 --> 00:12:27,972
WHAT'S HIS OFFER?
286
00:12:28,005 --> 00:12:29,641
HE'LL TAKE IT OFF
OUR HANDS FOR $15.
287
00:12:29,674 --> 00:12:31,843
$15? THAT'S
NOT VERY MUCH.
288
00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:32,844
ANDY...
289
00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:34,846
I KNOW. WHAT
ELSE WE GOT?
290
00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:37,649
ALL RIGHT, GO COLLECT
$15 FROM CHARLIE
291
00:12:37,682 --> 00:12:40,017
AND TELL HIM HE BOUGHT
HISSELF A CANNON.
292
00:12:40,051 --> 00:12:42,554
ANDY, WE DON'T
COLLECT THE $15.
293
00:12:42,587 --> 00:12:43,721
WE PAY IT.
294
00:12:43,755 --> 00:12:45,022
WE PAY IT?
295
00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:48,460
THAT'S THE BEST OFFER
I COULD GET OUT OF HIM.
296
00:12:48,493 --> 00:12:57,602
WE PAY HIM $15,
AND HE'LL HAUL IT AWAY.
297
00:12:57,635 --> 00:12:59,136
MAY I HELP YOU, SIR?
298
00:12:59,170 --> 00:13:02,740
YES, I'D LIKE A TIN
OF PIPE TOBACCO, PLEASE.
299
00:13:02,774 --> 00:13:04,008
UM, HOW'S THIS?
300
00:13:04,041 --> 00:13:05,142
THAT'S FINE.
301
00:13:05,176 --> 00:13:07,011
SAY, THAT'S INTERESTING.
302
00:13:07,044 --> 00:13:09,080
SOMETHING
I HAVEN'T SEEN IN AGES.
303
00:13:09,113 --> 00:13:10,515
SOAP?
304
00:13:10,548 --> 00:13:11,516
NO.
305
00:13:11,549 --> 00:13:13,084
THAT OLD COPPER WASH BOILER.
306
00:13:13,117 --> 00:13:14,752
UH, HOW MUCH DO I OWE YOU?
307
00:13:14,786 --> 00:13:16,153
THAT'LL BE 25 CENTS.
308
00:13:16,187 --> 00:13:17,955
ALL RIGHT, HERE YOU ARE.
309
00:13:17,989 --> 00:13:19,223
IS THIS FOR SALE?
310
00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:20,958
DO YOU WANT TO BUY IT?
311
00:13:20,992 --> 00:13:22,894
YES. I'M AN ANTIQUE DEALER.
312
00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,962
I'LL GIVE YOU $5 FOR IT.
313
00:13:24,996 --> 00:13:26,230
Ellie:
$5?
314
00:13:26,263 --> 00:13:27,832
WELL, MR., UH...
315
00:13:27,865 --> 00:13:29,033
MASON. RALPH MASON.
316
00:13:29,066 --> 00:13:30,702
MR. MASON, IF YOU
REALLY WANT TO BUY IT,
317
00:13:30,735 --> 00:13:31,836
I GUESS YOU CAN HAVE IT.
318
00:13:31,869 --> 00:13:33,137
I DON'T HAVE
MUCH USE FOR IT.
319
00:13:33,170 --> 00:13:34,105
FINE. FINE.
320
00:13:34,138 --> 00:13:35,139
HERE YOU ARE.
THANK YOU.
321
00:13:35,172 --> 00:13:39,611
UH, MR., UH... MASON,
WAS IT?
322
00:13:39,644 --> 00:13:40,945
UH, YES, MASON.
323
00:13:40,978 --> 00:13:42,847
MR. MASON,
I'M ANDY TAYLOR.
324
00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:44,882
I'M THE SHERIFF
IN THESE PARTS.
325
00:13:44,916 --> 00:13:46,250
WELL, HOW DO YOU DO, ANDY?
326
00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:47,151
HOW DO YOU DO?
327
00:13:47,184 --> 00:13:48,520
THIS IS BARNEY FIFE.
328
00:13:48,553 --> 00:13:49,721
HOW DO YOU DO, BARNEY?
329
00:13:49,754 --> 00:13:51,556
I'M THE DEPUTY.
330
00:13:51,589 --> 00:13:53,190
OH, THE DEPUTY.
331
00:13:53,224 --> 00:13:54,559
UH, MR. MASON,
332
00:13:54,592 --> 00:13:56,528
AS LONG AS YOU'RE
ON A SHOPPING SPREE,
333
00:13:56,561 --> 00:13:59,731
I BELIEVE WE'VE GOT SOMETHING
YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO PASS UP.
334
00:13:59,764 --> 00:14:00,765
OH, REALLY?
335
00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:02,800
WHAT IS IT?
336
00:14:06,103 --> 00:14:07,104
WELL, I...
337
00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:08,506
I DON'T KNOW.
338
00:14:08,540 --> 00:14:10,174
IT'S VERY INTERESTING,
339
00:14:10,207 --> 00:14:12,977
BUT I'M NOT SURE
I CAN FIND A BUYER FOR IT.
340
00:14:13,010 --> 00:14:15,613
WELL, NOW, WAIT
A MINUTE, MR. MASON.
341
00:14:15,647 --> 00:14:18,182
YOU'RE INTERESTED IN
HISTORICAL TREASURES,
342
00:14:18,215 --> 00:14:19,183
AIN'T YOU?
343
00:14:19,216 --> 00:14:20,818
HISTORICAL TREASURES?
344
00:14:20,852 --> 00:14:22,286
OH, YES, SIR.
345
00:14:22,319 --> 00:14:24,856
LIKE FIRING THE FIRST SHOT
AT FORT SUMTER AND LIKE THAT.
346
00:14:24,889 --> 00:14:25,857
REALLY?
347
00:14:25,890 --> 00:14:29,093
[ CHUCKLING ]
348
00:14:29,126 --> 00:14:30,862
WELL, I...I DON'T KNOW.
349
00:14:30,895 --> 00:14:34,699
OH, THERE'S HISTORY
WRITTEN ALL OVER
THIS OLD CANNON,
350
00:14:34,732 --> 00:14:35,733
MR. MASON.
351
00:14:35,767 --> 00:14:37,935
YOU SEE THAT CRACK
RIGHT THERE?
352
00:14:37,969 --> 00:14:39,671
Mason: YES.
353
00:14:39,704 --> 00:14:41,873
YOU ARE INTERESTED
IN HISTORICAL CANNONS, AINT YOU?
354
00:14:41,906 --> 00:14:43,040
OH, YES.
YES, INDEED.
355
00:14:43,074 --> 00:14:44,308
GOOD. GOOD.
356
00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:46,911
THAT CRACK RIGHT THERE
COME FROM A DIRECT HIT
357
00:14:46,944 --> 00:14:50,782
WHILST TEDDY ROOSEVELT WAS
DRAGGING HER UP SAN JUAN HILL.
358
00:14:50,815 --> 00:14:52,049
REALLY?
359
00:14:56,947 --> 00:14:58,314
WHAT ARE YOU
MAKING FACES FOR?
360
00:14:58,348 --> 00:14:59,615
WE HAVE TO SELL
THAT CANNON.
361
00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:01,451
WHAT ARE YOU TRYING
TO DO, SPOIL THIS?
362
00:15:01,484 --> 00:15:03,153
WELL, WHAT ARE YOU
TRYING TO TELL HIM?
363
00:15:03,186 --> 00:15:05,121
YOU KNOW THAT CANNON WAS
NEVER AT SAN JUAN HILL.
364
00:15:05,155 --> 00:15:07,057
WELL, HOW DO YOU KNOW?
WERE YOU THERE?
365
00:15:07,090 --> 00:15:08,925
YOU WANT TO BUY
THIS CANNON?
NO.
366
00:15:08,959 --> 00:15:10,093
WELL, STOP MAKING FACES.
367
00:15:10,126 --> 00:15:12,595
WELL, I
JUST DON'T KNOW.
368
00:15:12,628 --> 00:15:14,264
OH, YES, SIR, MR. MASON.
369
00:15:14,297 --> 00:15:16,632
TEDDY ROOSEVELT
HAD A LOT OF CANNONS,
370
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:19,102
BUT THIS IS HIS
VERY FAVORITE ONE.
371
00:15:19,135 --> 00:15:23,139
WHEN HE YELLED "CHARGE,"
THIS IS WHAT HE CHARGED WITH.
372
00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:26,576
BUT I THOUGHT TEDDY ROOSEVELT
LED A CAVALRY UNIT.
373
00:15:26,609 --> 00:15:28,144
HOW'S THAT?
374
00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:31,014
WELL, I UNDERSTOOD
WHEN HE CHARGED UP SAN JUAN HILL
375
00:15:31,047 --> 00:15:32,415
HE CHARGED UP ON HORSEBACK.
376
00:15:32,448 --> 00:15:35,018
OH, WELL, NOW, THAT'S RIGHT.
377
00:15:35,051 --> 00:15:37,553
HE DID CHARGE
ON HORSEBACK
378
00:15:37,587 --> 00:15:40,590
DRAGGING THIS CANNON
BEHIND HIM.
379
00:15:40,623 --> 00:15:42,058
YOU SEE THE INITIALS
RIGHT THERE?
380
00:15:42,092 --> 00:15:43,059
OH, YEAH.
381
00:15:43,093 --> 00:15:44,227
SEE THAT "T.R."?
YES.
382
00:15:44,260 --> 00:15:46,596
TEDDY ROOSEVELT.
383
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:53,336
WILL YOU STOP THAT?
384
00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:54,337
TEDDY ROOSEVELT?
385
00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:55,471
YOU KNOW TRACY RUPERT
386
00:15:55,505 --> 00:15:57,507
SCRATCHED THAT
ON THERE WITH A NAIL.
387
00:15:57,540 --> 00:15:58,641
WELL, SO WHAT?
388
00:15:58,674 --> 00:16:00,210
WELL, YOU'RE
TELLING HIM A LIE.
389
00:16:00,243 --> 00:16:01,211
YOU WANNA BUY THIS CANNON?
NO.
390
00:16:01,244 --> 00:16:03,013
WELL, SHUT UP!
OOH!
391
00:16:03,046 --> 00:16:04,014
SHERIFF?
YES?
392
00:16:04,047 --> 00:16:05,115
PA, I NEVER HEARD...
393
00:16:05,148 --> 00:16:07,250
OH, YOU NEVER HEARD
394
00:16:07,283 --> 00:16:08,484
BECAUSE YOU BEEN
TOO BUSY TALKING.
395
00:16:08,518 --> 00:16:09,485
I'VE BEEN QUIET.
396
00:16:09,519 --> 00:16:10,653
WELL, YOU BEEN
LOOKING NOISY.
397
00:16:10,686 --> 00:16:12,655
BUT, PA, I STILL
NEVER --
398
00:16:12,688 --> 00:16:15,625
GO FIND THE BARREL RING
AND TELL BARNEY TO PUT IT AWAY.
399
00:16:15,658 --> 00:16:17,060
WHAT BARREL RING?
400
00:16:17,093 --> 00:16:19,029
NEVER MIND.
JUST FIND ONE, FIND ONE.
401
00:16:19,062 --> 00:16:22,632
NOW THEN, UH, MR. MASON,
SHALL WE SIT DOWN
402
00:16:22,665 --> 00:16:24,534
AND DO A LITTLE
SERIOUS DICKERING
403
00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:27,537
ABOUT THIS FINE,
OLD, HISTORIC PIECE?
404
00:16:29,172 --> 00:16:30,740
HIM AND HIS GOLDEN RULE.
405
00:16:30,773 --> 00:16:33,643
I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO STOP
THINKING ABOUT IT.
406
00:16:33,676 --> 00:16:36,046
I WAS SO MAD I DIDN'T EVEN PUT
AWAY THE BARREL RING.
407
00:16:36,079 --> 00:16:37,780
WHAT BARREL RING?
408
00:16:37,813 --> 00:16:41,684
OH, THE ONE OPIE BROUGHT IN.
409
00:16:41,717 --> 00:16:44,354
I DID IT! I DID IT!
410
00:16:44,387 --> 00:16:46,522
AND HOLD ONTO YOURSELVES
WHEN I TELL YOU
411
00:16:46,556 --> 00:16:48,224
HOW MUCH I GOT
FOR THAT CANNON,
412
00:16:48,258 --> 00:16:51,061
'CAUSE YOU'RE GONNA JUMP
CLEAR OUT OF YOUR SKINS.
413
00:16:51,094 --> 00:16:55,198
I GOT $175!
414
00:16:58,201 --> 00:16:59,369
YOUR SKINS AIN'T A-RIPPING.
415
00:16:59,402 --> 00:17:01,371
MAYBE YOU DON'T
BELIEVE YOUR EARS.
416
00:17:01,404 --> 00:17:03,773
I GOT $175
417
00:17:03,806 --> 00:17:06,509
FOR THE CANNON!
418
00:17:06,542 --> 00:17:09,745
I'M JUST NOT
MAKING CONTACT.
419
00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:11,781
BARNEY TOLD ME HOW YOU DID IT.
420
00:17:11,814 --> 00:17:14,650
OH, WELL, MAYBE I
DID STRETCH THE TRUTH
421
00:17:14,684 --> 00:17:17,220
A LITTLE BIT, BUT
WHAT'S THE HARM?
422
00:17:17,253 --> 00:17:20,456
WELL, IT'S NOT LIKE
MR. MASON'S
423
00:17:20,490 --> 00:17:21,457
GOING TO BE OUT
ANYTHING.
424
00:17:21,491 --> 00:17:22,625
HE'S A ANTIQUE DEALER
425
00:17:22,658 --> 00:17:24,360
AND HE'LL JUST SELL IT
TO SOMEBODY ELSE
426
00:17:24,394 --> 00:17:27,097
AND WIND UP MAKING
EVEN MORE.
427
00:17:32,702 --> 00:17:35,605
WELL, THIS IS
A FINE HOWDY-DO.
428
00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:39,075
ALL I DID WAS
A LITTLE HORSE TRADING
429
00:17:39,109 --> 00:17:41,677
AND INSTEAD OF THE
TOWN BEING OUT $15
430
00:17:41,711 --> 00:17:43,146
TO GET RID
OF THE CANNON,
431
00:17:43,179 --> 00:17:47,283
WE COME OUT $175
TO THE GOOD.
432
00:17:47,317 --> 00:17:49,752
YOU'D THINK
I'D JUST COMMITTED
433
00:17:49,785 --> 00:17:51,521
A BANK ROBBERY.
434
00:17:54,424 --> 00:17:56,559
[ SLURPING ]
435
00:17:59,362 --> 00:18:03,599
IF THAT DON'T BEAT ANYTHING
I EVER SAW IN MY LIFE.
436
00:18:07,270 --> 00:18:08,638
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
437
00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,373
IN THERE TO GET A CONE.
438
00:18:10,406 --> 00:18:13,109
WELL, GET YOUR CONE
SOMEPLACE ELSE.
439
00:18:13,143 --> 00:18:16,379
NO SON OF MINE IS GOING
TO PATRONIZE A PLACE...
440
00:18:16,412 --> 00:18:18,248
WHERE'D YOU GET
THEM ROLLER SKATES?
441
00:18:18,281 --> 00:18:21,517
SAME PLACE I GOT THE MONEY
FOR THE CONE, FROM JERRY PARKER.
442
00:18:21,551 --> 00:18:23,553
OPIE TAYLOR,
DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME
443
00:18:23,586 --> 00:18:26,522
THAT AFTER ALL THE TALKING
I DID ABOUT THE GOLDEN RULE
444
00:18:26,556 --> 00:18:28,724
YOU TRADED
THEM LICORICE SEEDS ANYHOW?
445
00:18:28,758 --> 00:18:30,393
OH, NO, PA.
446
00:18:30,426 --> 00:18:32,128
WELL, THAT'S GOOD.
447
00:18:32,162 --> 00:18:35,131
I TRADED HIM THAT CUFF LINK
THAT YOU GAVE ME THE OTHER DAY.
448
00:18:35,165 --> 00:18:36,832
THAT OLD BROKEN CUFF LINK
THAT WAS ON MY DRESSER?
449
00:18:36,866 --> 00:18:38,568
YES, SIR.
450
00:18:38,601 --> 00:18:41,437
AND JERRY PARKER GAVE YOU
A GOOD PAIR OF SKATES
451
00:18:41,471 --> 00:18:43,306
AND ENOUGH MONEY
FOR A CONE FOR THAT?
452
00:18:43,339 --> 00:18:44,307
YES, SIR.
453
00:18:44,340 --> 00:18:45,575
WELL, HOW DO YOU FIGURE
454
00:18:45,608 --> 00:18:47,810
YOU WAS ABLE TO MAKE
SUCH A GOOD TRADE?
455
00:18:47,843 --> 00:18:50,680
WELL, MAYBE 'CAUSE
HE GOT THE IDEA
456
00:18:50,713 --> 00:18:52,748
THAT IT WAS REALLY A BUTTON
457
00:18:52,782 --> 00:18:56,352
OFF THE UNIFORM
OF GENERAL GEORGE WASHINGTON.
458
00:18:58,321 --> 00:19:00,556
THAT WAS THE IDEA THAT HE HAD.
459
00:19:10,666 --> 00:19:12,402
NOW, YOU TAKE
THEM SKATES OFF
460
00:19:12,435 --> 00:19:13,469
AS FAST AS
YOU KNOW HOW.
461
00:19:13,503 --> 00:19:14,770
WHY, PA?
462
00:19:14,804 --> 00:19:16,439
BECAUSE YOU'RE
RETURNING THEM,
THAT'S WHY.
463
00:19:16,472 --> 00:19:17,440
BUT, PA...
464
00:19:17,473 --> 00:19:18,441
AND THE MONEY
FOR THE CONE.
465
00:19:18,474 --> 00:19:19,775
NOW, COME ON,
GET 'EM OFF.
466
00:19:23,346 --> 00:19:25,848
WHAT'S THE MATTER, PA?
467
00:19:25,881 --> 00:19:28,884
THE MATTER IS THAT
I GOT A IDEA
468
00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:30,453
ABOUT THE IDEA
JERRY GOT
469
00:19:30,486 --> 00:19:32,422
ABOUT THAT CUFF LINK
BEING A BUTTON
470
00:19:32,455 --> 00:19:34,390
OFF OF GENERAL
WASHINGTON'S UNIFORM,
471
00:19:34,424 --> 00:19:35,491
AND THE IDEA I GOT
472
00:19:35,525 --> 00:19:37,293
IS THAT IT'S JUST
BARELY POSSIBLE
473
00:19:37,327 --> 00:19:39,362
THAT THE IDEA JERRY
GOT COULDA COME FROM YOU.
474
00:19:39,395 --> 00:19:40,363
HOW ABOUT IT?
475
00:19:40,396 --> 00:19:41,431
WELL...
476
00:19:41,464 --> 00:19:43,266
NOW, COME ON,
TELL ME THE TRUTH.
477
00:19:43,299 --> 00:19:44,734
I DON'T WANT
YOU LYING TO ME
478
00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:46,369
ON TOP OF
EVERYTHING ELSE.
479
00:19:46,402 --> 00:19:48,838
OKAY. IT'S BARELY POSSIBLE.
480
00:19:51,507 --> 00:19:53,276
DO YOU KNOW
WHAT YOU'VE DONE?
481
00:19:53,309 --> 00:19:55,311
YOU'VE JUST BROKEN
THE GOLDEN RULE,
482
00:19:55,345 --> 00:19:57,780
AND THROWN IT RIGHT OUT
THE WINDOW AND CHEATED.
483
00:19:57,813 --> 00:19:59,749
OH, NO, PA, I
DIDN'T CHEAT AT ALL.
484
00:19:59,782 --> 00:20:01,784
WELL, WHAT
DO YOU CALL IT THEN?
485
00:20:01,817 --> 00:20:03,753
BEING SMART,
JUST LIKE YOU.
486
00:20:05,488 --> 00:20:06,656
WHAT?
487
00:20:06,689 --> 00:20:08,824
SURE. WHEN I SAW HOW
YOU DICKERED
488
00:20:08,858 --> 00:20:10,960
WITH THAT FELLOW
FOR THE CANNON,
489
00:20:10,993 --> 00:20:12,828
I KNEW HOW
IMPORTANT IT IS
490
00:20:12,862 --> 00:20:14,430
TO MAKE UP A GOOD STORY
491
00:20:14,464 --> 00:20:16,966
TO GO WITH WHATEVER
IT IS YOU'RE TRADING.
492
00:20:16,999 --> 00:20:19,769
SO I MADE UP THE STORY
ABOUT GEORGE WASHINGTON.
493
00:20:19,802 --> 00:20:21,704
AIN'T THAT BEING SMART, PA?
494
00:20:21,737 --> 00:20:23,739
NO, THAT'S NOT BEING SMART.
495
00:20:23,773 --> 00:20:26,842
THAT'S JUST LYING --
LYING AND CHEATING.
496
00:20:26,876 --> 00:20:30,580
BUT DIDN'T YOU DO THE SAME
WITH THAT FELLOW, PA?
497
00:20:30,613 --> 00:20:32,348
WELL, WELL, WELL, NO!
498
00:20:32,382 --> 00:20:33,383
NO?
499
00:20:33,416 --> 00:20:34,550
NO!
500
00:20:34,584 --> 00:20:37,253
WHAT I DID
WAS TO BUILD UP THE PRODUCT
501
00:20:37,287 --> 00:20:39,589
SO IT'D BE EASIER
FOR ME TO SELL.
502
00:20:39,622 --> 00:20:40,790
THAT'S WHAT I DID.
503
00:20:40,823 --> 00:20:42,425
WELL, WELL, NO, NOW.
504
00:20:42,458 --> 00:20:45,295
NOW, WHAT, WHAT I DID
IS WHAT WE CALL
505
00:20:45,328 --> 00:20:47,663
A LITTLE INNOCENT
HORSE TRADING.
506
00:20:47,697 --> 00:20:49,599
I KNOW.
THAT'S WHAT I DID.
507
00:20:49,632 --> 00:20:50,966
WELL, NOW, NO.
508
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:54,337
YOU SEE, IT'S DIFFERENT
WITH YOU.
509
00:20:54,370 --> 00:20:57,873
WITH, WITH GROWN FOLKS,
WHY, WHY, WE...
510
00:20:59,642 --> 00:21:02,044
YOU KNOW WHAT
I THINK, PA?
511
00:21:02,077 --> 00:21:03,413
WHAT?
512
00:21:03,446 --> 00:21:06,449
I THINK WE BOTH
BROKE THE GOLDEN RULE.
513
00:21:08,984 --> 00:21:11,921
I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT, OPIE.
514
00:21:11,954 --> 00:21:13,689
NOW, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT --
515
00:21:13,723 --> 00:21:16,058
YOU TAKE THEM SKATES
BACK TO JERRY,
516
00:21:16,091 --> 00:21:17,927
AND I GOT
A LITTLE FENCE MENDING
517
00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:19,829
TO DO OF MY OWN,
ALL RIGHT?
518
00:21:19,862 --> 00:21:20,963
ALL RIGHT.
519
00:21:20,996 --> 00:21:21,964
ALL RIGHT.
520
00:21:28,938 --> 00:21:30,340
ANOTHER ROOT BEER FLOAT.
521
00:21:30,373 --> 00:21:32,342
BARNEY, DON'T YOU
THINK YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH?
522
00:21:32,375 --> 00:21:33,676
YOU LET ME WORRY
ABOUT THAT.
523
00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,978
BUT, BARNEY, FOUR
INSIDE OF FIFTEEN MINUTES.
524
00:21:36,011 --> 00:21:37,813
PUTTING ALL THAT
ICE CREAM AND SODA
525
00:21:37,847 --> 00:21:38,914
IN YOUR STOMACH.
526
00:21:38,948 --> 00:21:40,883
ELLIE, IF YOU WON'T
SELL IT TO ME,
527
00:21:40,916 --> 00:21:42,685
I'LL JUST BUY IT
SOMEWHERES ELSE.
528
00:21:42,718 --> 00:21:44,887
ALL RIGHT.
529
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:48,491
YOU KNOW, I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE
THAT ANDY WOULD DO SUCH A THING.
530
00:21:48,524 --> 00:21:49,759
I LOOKED UP TO THAT MAN.
531
00:21:49,792 --> 00:21:51,461
WELL, THERE'S ONE THING,
BARNEY --
532
00:21:51,494 --> 00:21:53,429
HE ISN'T DOING THIS
FOR PERSONAL PROFIT,
533
00:21:53,463 --> 00:21:54,930
HE'S DOING IT
FOR THE GOOD OF THE TOWN.
534
00:21:54,964 --> 00:21:57,567
WELL, THAT DON'T MAKE IT RIGHT.
535
00:21:57,600 --> 00:21:58,868
OH, DEPUTY.
536
00:21:58,901 --> 00:22:02,004
I'VE BEEN LOOKING
ALL OVER FOR SHERIFF TAYLOR.
537
00:22:02,037 --> 00:22:03,606
YOU CAN SAVE ME
THE TROUBLE.
538
00:22:03,639 --> 00:22:06,609
HERE'S MY CERTIFIED CHECK
IN PAYMENT FOR THE CANNON.
539
00:22:06,642 --> 00:22:07,910
WELL, UH, MR. MASON...
540
00:22:07,943 --> 00:22:10,446
YOU MADE YOUR DEAL
WITH SHERIFF TAYLOR,
541
00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:12,748
AND YOU LET HIM
DO HIS OWN COLLECTING.
542
00:22:12,782 --> 00:22:15,518
WELL, IT REALLY DOESN'T
MATTER WHO ACCEPTS IT.
543
00:22:15,551 --> 00:22:17,820
IT'S MADE OUT
TO THE TOWN OF MAYBERRY.
544
00:22:17,853 --> 00:22:18,821
OH, MR. MASON.
545
00:22:18,854 --> 00:22:20,022
OH, THERE YOU ARE, SHERIFF.
546
00:22:20,055 --> 00:22:21,524
I BEEN LOOKING
FOR YOU.
547
00:22:21,557 --> 00:22:22,692
WELL, NO NEED TO WORRY.
548
00:22:22,725 --> 00:22:24,727
I'VE GOT THAT CERTIFIED CHECK
FOR YOU
549
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:25,895
JUST AS I PROMISED.
550
00:22:25,928 --> 00:22:27,597
WELL, YOU BETTER
JUST KEEP THAT.
551
00:22:27,630 --> 00:22:29,632
I'M AFRAID THAT'S MONEY
WE CAN'T TAKE.
552
00:22:29,665 --> 00:22:31,501
WHY? WE MADE A DEAL.
553
00:22:31,534 --> 00:22:33,369
WELL, I KNOW WE DID.
554
00:22:33,403 --> 00:22:35,638
BUT THE DEAL WE MADE
IS BASED ON LIES.
555
00:22:35,671 --> 00:22:36,639
OH?
556
00:22:36,672 --> 00:22:38,541
YEAH. EVERYTHING
I TOLD YOU
557
00:22:38,574 --> 00:22:40,910
ABOUT TEDDY ROOSEVELT
AND SAN JUAN HILL
558
00:22:40,943 --> 00:22:43,513
AND ALL LIKE THAT,
WELL, I MADE THAT UP,
559
00:22:43,546 --> 00:22:45,648
AND I HAVE TO BE HONEST
WITH YOU.
560
00:22:45,681 --> 00:22:46,916
WELL, I APPRECIATE THAT
561
00:22:46,949 --> 00:22:49,151
AND I HAVE TO BE HONEST
WITH YOU, TOO.
562
00:22:49,184 --> 00:22:51,020
I THINK I CAN SELL IT.
563
00:22:51,053 --> 00:22:52,955
THAT RUSTY OLD EYESORE?
564
00:22:52,988 --> 00:22:55,858
THAT OLD CANNON
AIN'T WORTH $175.
565
00:22:55,891 --> 00:22:57,660
ALL RIGHT. I'LL GIVE YOU $150.
566
00:22:57,693 --> 00:22:59,094
WILL THAT EASE YOUR MIND?
567
00:22:59,128 --> 00:23:01,597
FOR A CANNON
THAT AIN'T EVEN BEEN IN A WAR?
568
00:23:01,631 --> 00:23:03,098
OKAY, LET'S MAKE
IT A HUNDRED.
569
00:23:03,132 --> 00:23:04,967
NO. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND,
MR. MASON.
570
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:06,702
I JUST CAN'T
CHEAT YOU.
571
00:23:06,736 --> 00:23:08,671
WELL, HOW ABOUT 75?
NO.
572
00:23:08,704 --> 00:23:09,872
65?
NO.
573
00:23:09,905 --> 00:23:11,040
50?
NO.
574
00:23:11,073 --> 00:23:12,041
40?
30.
575
00:23:12,074 --> 00:23:13,976
DONE.
576
00:23:14,009 --> 00:23:15,411
THERE YOU ARE, $30.
577
00:23:15,445 --> 00:23:16,546
I'LL HAVE IT MOVED
578
00:23:16,579 --> 00:23:17,580
WITHIN A WEEK.
579
00:23:17,613 --> 00:23:18,714
OH, THAT'S RIGHT.
580
00:23:18,748 --> 00:23:20,483
I FORGOT ABOUT YOU
HAVING TO MOVE IT.
581
00:23:20,516 --> 00:23:22,117
THAT'LL COST
AT LEAST TEN DOLLARS.
582
00:23:22,151 --> 00:23:24,019
I'LL JUST GIVE YOU
TEN DOLLARS BACK
583
00:23:24,053 --> 00:23:26,055
AND THAT'LL MAKE IT $20
FAIR AND SQUARE
584
00:23:26,088 --> 00:23:27,056
ALL THE WAY AROUND.
585
00:23:27,089 --> 00:23:28,958
SHERIFF, I JUST
WANT TO SAY
586
00:23:28,991 --> 00:23:31,160
THIS IS THE DARNDEST
BUSINESS DEAL
587
00:23:31,193 --> 00:23:32,127
I WAS EVER IN.
588
00:23:32,161 --> 00:23:34,129
COME BACK
TO SEE US.
589
00:23:34,163 --> 00:23:35,130
THANK YOU.
590
00:23:35,164 --> 00:23:36,131
SO LONG.
591
00:23:36,165 --> 00:23:37,500
WE'LL SEE YOU.
592
00:23:37,533 --> 00:23:38,801
OH, ANDY,
593
00:23:38,834 --> 00:23:40,202
YOU DID THE RIGHT THING,
AND I'M PROUD OF YOU.
594
00:23:40,235 --> 00:23:41,971
HOW WAS THAT
FOR HORSE TRADING?
595
00:23:42,004 --> 00:23:43,539
WHEN I SET OUT TO LOSE,
596
00:23:43,573 --> 00:23:45,841
I REALLY DO A GOOD JOB
OF IT, DON'T I?
597
00:23:45,875 --> 00:23:46,842
ANDY...
598
00:23:46,876 --> 00:23:47,843
HUH?
599
00:23:47,877 --> 00:23:49,812
WELL...
600
00:23:59,589 --> 00:24:02,925
I OUGHT NEVER TO DRINK.
601
00:24:11,266 --> 00:24:13,235
OH, ANDY.
OH, HI.
602
00:24:13,268 --> 00:24:17,139
WELL, YOU LOOK LIKE A PERSON
WITH SOMETHING ON THEIR MIND.
603
00:24:17,172 --> 00:24:19,675
I AM. I JUST GOT THIS WIRE
FROM MR. MILFORD PHILLIPS.
604
00:24:19,709 --> 00:24:21,544
OH, GOOD. I HOPE THAT PLAQUE
HE'S GIVING THE TOWN
605
00:24:21,577 --> 00:24:22,878
IS ON ITS WAY.
606
00:24:22,912 --> 00:24:24,814
YEAH, THAT CANNON
SURE LEFT A BARE SPOT.
607
00:24:24,847 --> 00:24:26,015
MAYBE YOU BETTER READ
THIS, ANDY.
608
00:24:26,048 --> 00:24:27,016
OKAY.
609
00:24:27,049 --> 00:24:29,251
"MAYBERRY TOWN COUNCIL,
610
00:24:29,284 --> 00:24:31,954
"HAVE RECONSIDERED
GIVING PLAQUE.
611
00:24:31,987 --> 00:24:33,889
"HAVE FOUND SOMETHING
MUCH BETTER
612
00:24:33,923 --> 00:24:35,591
"AND MORE FITTING FOR A TOWN.
613
00:24:35,625 --> 00:24:38,227
"AM SENDING YOU GENUINE
SILVER WAR CANNON
614
00:24:38,260 --> 00:24:39,695
"WITH CRACK DOWN MUZZLE
615
00:24:39,729 --> 00:24:42,732
FROM ACTUAL COMBAT
AT SAN JUAN HILL"?
616
00:24:48,538 --> 00:24:51,874
[ WHISTLING SPRIGHTLY TUNE ]
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