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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,687 --> 00:00:12,485 # You must remember this 2 00:00:12,527 --> 00:00:15,121 # A kiss is still a kiss 3 00:00:15,167 --> 00:00:17,965 # A sigh is just a sigh 4 00:00:20,647 --> 00:00:24,322 # The fundamental things apply 5 00:00:24,367 --> 00:00:27,996 # As time goes by # 6 00:00:32,967 --> 00:00:35,527 (Clears throat) 7 00:00:41,847 --> 00:00:44,236 (Clears throat) 8 00:00:47,647 --> 00:00:49,524 (Chuckles) 9 00:00:50,807 --> 00:00:52,081 (Clears throat) 10 00:00:52,127 --> 00:00:55,244 Do you always clear your throat every time you turn the page? 11 00:00:55,287 --> 00:00:57,278 - I wasn't aware I did. - Well, you do. 12 00:00:57,327 --> 00:00:59,045 I'm sorry. 13 00:01:00,527 --> 00:01:03,599 - I've never noticed that. - I'm sure you haven't. 14 00:01:03,647 --> 00:01:06,400 - Didn't your wife notice? - We never read in bed. 15 00:01:06,447 --> 00:01:10,235 She wouldn't have the light on under any circumstances. 16 00:01:10,287 --> 00:01:12,721 (Chuckles) Oh, I see. 17 00:01:15,247 --> 00:01:17,966 I wonder why I do it. What do you think it is? 18 00:01:18,007 --> 00:01:19,963 Annoying. 19 00:01:21,087 --> 00:01:24,284 - Does it have psychological significance? - I doubt it. 20 00:01:24,327 --> 00:01:28,684 I bet it does. Like the way you always whistle when you're chopping onions. 21 00:01:28,727 --> 00:01:31,082 - I don't! - You do. You just haven't noticed. 22 00:01:31,127 --> 00:01:34,358 - What do I whistle? - You're quite ambitious. 23 00:01:34,407 --> 00:01:38,480 Last time it was... the 1812 Overture. 24 00:01:39,207 --> 00:01:42,836 - What, all of it? - No. You only chopped two onions. 25 00:01:43,727 --> 00:01:47,766 - What a ridiculous conversation. - I think we can say it's original. 26 00:01:47,807 --> 00:01:50,958 - Nice to have someone to talk to in bed. - Yes. 27 00:01:51,007 --> 00:01:55,842 - How's the strength of the peseta? - I haven't the faintest idea. 28 00:01:55,887 --> 00:01:59,243 - We're safer sticking to peculiar habits. - Yes. 29 00:01:59,287 --> 00:02:02,757 Another thing, you always fold your socks when you take them off. 30 00:02:02,807 --> 00:02:05,037 - And you... - I thought we were doing you. 31 00:02:05,087 --> 00:02:10,081 I'll tell you what. Let's leave it for another night. I've got to be at my best in the morning. 32 00:02:10,127 --> 00:02:13,597 I'm seeing a candidate about running the new branch of the agency. 33 00:02:13,647 --> 00:02:17,083 - It's up to her to be at her best, then. - How do you know it's a her? 34 00:02:17,127 --> 00:02:19,960 Because you had your hair done yesterday. 35 00:02:20,007 --> 00:02:22,601 - You are getting astute. - (Phone) 36 00:02:23,967 --> 00:02:27,084 - It's half past twelve. - It's Sunday night. Let it ring. 37 00:02:27,127 --> 00:02:30,244 - I can't. - Let Judith answer it. 38 00:02:30,287 --> 00:02:34,246 Judith would sleep through a brass band concert in her bedroom. 39 00:02:35,607 --> 00:02:39,043 - Ooh! - It'll stop ringing just as you get to it. 40 00:02:39,087 --> 00:02:41,282 - Thanks for that. - (Laughs) 41 00:02:42,527 --> 00:02:44,563 (Clears throat) Oh! 42 00:02:45,447 --> 00:02:49,326 (Ringing continues) 43 00:02:52,327 --> 00:02:54,204 - Yes? - Hi, lovely lady. 44 00:02:54,247 --> 00:02:57,205 It's Alistair. I've just got in from LA. 45 00:02:57,247 --> 00:03:02,037 Oh, I couldn't be more thrilled. Alistair, it's past midnight. 46 00:03:02,087 --> 00:03:07,036 Well, we got stacked. Look, I need to talk to Lionel, like, yesterday. 47 00:03:07,087 --> 00:03:10,318 Well, he won't like it but... I'll get him. 48 00:03:10,367 --> 00:03:14,280 No need, no need. I'll be there in about half an hour. 49 00:03:14,327 --> 00:03:15,999 Bye! 50 00:03:17,207 --> 00:03:19,004 (Whimpers) 51 00:03:25,407 --> 00:03:28,080 - You didn't have to get up. - I was up. 52 00:03:29,087 --> 00:03:31,282 Officially, I mean. 53 00:03:31,327 --> 00:03:35,764 What if I just open the door and throw a bucket of water over him? 54 00:03:35,807 --> 00:03:39,766 Tempting. But he did go all the way to America for you. 55 00:03:39,807 --> 00:03:45,086 Yes. The great miniseries idea. Love in the Stone Age. 56 00:03:45,127 --> 00:03:48,597 Well, he thinks it'll work. He may have some news. 57 00:03:48,647 --> 00:03:53,482 He'd better have. If he's coming around to show us his holiday slides I shall get unpleasant. 58 00:03:53,527 --> 00:03:55,802 (Doorbell) 59 00:03:55,847 --> 00:03:58,122 How can somebody get here that quickly? 60 00:03:58,167 --> 00:04:01,477 I have a sneaking suspicion he's actually Superman. 61 00:04:08,047 --> 00:04:10,117 Oh, Alistair. 62 00:04:11,207 --> 00:04:14,005 Hey, listen. It's just struck me. 63 00:04:15,007 --> 00:04:17,441 - Did I wake you? - We were just talking. 64 00:04:17,487 --> 00:04:19,284 Oh, as in... talking. 65 00:04:19,327 --> 00:04:21,966 Yes, we were discussing grunting and onions. 66 00:04:22,007 --> 00:04:24,885 - As in... - Grunting and onions. You've lost me. 67 00:04:24,927 --> 00:04:27,600 Well, that makes a change. 68 00:04:31,647 --> 00:04:33,956 - Hi, Li. - Good morning. 69 00:04:34,007 --> 00:04:38,285 Before I forget, I brought you these. 70 00:04:38,327 --> 00:04:40,397 - Why? - For fun. 71 00:04:41,327 --> 00:04:43,477 - Thank you. - Well, try them on. 72 00:04:44,327 --> 00:04:45,965 Come on. 73 00:04:49,607 --> 00:04:53,919 - (Alistair) Monster! You look sensational. - Do we? 74 00:04:53,967 --> 00:04:57,004 Thank you, Alistair. Sit down. Would you like some coffee? 75 00:04:57,047 --> 00:04:59,242 Oh, superb. 76 00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:03,245 Well, this is something, isn't it? 77 00:05:03,287 --> 00:05:08,441 Yes. I like nothing better than sitting in the kitchen in the early hours wearing a silly hat. 78 00:05:08,487 --> 00:05:11,206 If you don't like it, you don't have to keep it on. 79 00:05:11,247 --> 00:05:12,396 Good. 80 00:05:12,447 --> 00:05:15,439 I'll keep mine on, Alistair, if you get to the point. 81 00:05:15,487 --> 00:05:18,001 OK. Here's the point with a capital P. 82 00:05:18,047 --> 00:05:21,084 - I've been talking to CBS. - Who's he? 83 00:05:21,127 --> 00:05:24,244 An American television network. 84 00:05:24,287 --> 00:05:27,518 Substitute "the". And they're excited by your idea. 85 00:05:27,567 --> 00:05:30,479 - It's your idea. - Our idea, then. 86 00:05:30,527 --> 00:05:32,199 Your story. 87 00:05:32,247 --> 00:05:36,320 The young soldier and the young nurse falling in love but being parted by the Korean War. 88 00:05:36,367 --> 00:05:40,918 Did I pitch it or did I pitch it? Cy Liebermann cried. 89 00:05:40,967 --> 00:05:43,003 - With laughter? - Li! 90 00:05:43,047 --> 00:05:46,084 - It's not the Cy Liebermann, is it? - You know him? 91 00:05:46,127 --> 00:05:49,517 No. I just thought it must be the Cy Liebermann. 92 00:05:49,567 --> 00:05:51,797 I'm sorry, it must be the hat. 93 00:05:51,847 --> 00:05:54,486 OK, are you ready for this? 94 00:05:54,527 --> 00:05:56,836 Cy Liebermann wants a treatment. 95 00:05:56,887 --> 00:06:00,402 - Why, what's wrong with him? - (Both laugh) 96 00:06:00,447 --> 00:06:05,680 - Nice one, Lionel. - It's good news! I mean, a treatment. 97 00:06:05,727 --> 00:06:08,036 What is a treatment? 98 00:06:08,087 --> 00:06:12,797 Something on paper. An outline of the story. A kind of... development. 99 00:06:12,847 --> 00:06:14,997 - What's a development? - Like a treatment. 100 00:06:15,047 --> 00:06:19,916 - We're back where we started. - 20, 25 pages about your story. Hm? 101 00:06:19,967 --> 00:06:22,117 How you see it, how you'd write it, 102 00:06:22,167 --> 00:06:24,476 locations, characters, 103 00:06:24,527 --> 00:06:27,121 and just enough dialogue to make Cy drool. 104 00:06:27,167 --> 00:06:28,998 - You can do that. - I can? 105 00:06:29,047 --> 00:06:30,480 - Course you can. - Tell the man. 106 00:06:30,527 --> 00:06:34,122 - Just told him. - Oh, I don't know. It's not my field. 107 00:06:34,167 --> 00:06:36,806 Lionel, be positive. This is part of your life. 108 00:06:36,847 --> 00:06:40,556 We have a short cut here. We have the ear of the horse's mouth. 109 00:06:40,607 --> 00:06:44,077 - It's Cy to Li, more or less. - More or less what? 110 00:06:44,127 --> 00:06:47,085 Well, first we have to set up a meeting with Mike Barbosa. 111 00:06:47,127 --> 00:06:51,882 He's like Cy's right arm. If he likes the treatment, he flies back to the coast... 112 00:06:51,927 --> 00:06:54,919 - Which coast? - Los Angeles. The coast. 113 00:06:54,967 --> 00:06:58,198 He flies back to the coast with a smile on all our faces. 114 00:06:58,247 --> 00:07:01,762 This Mike Barbosa's coming all this way to read the treatment? 115 00:07:01,807 --> 00:07:05,686 Well, no, he's coming to London to buy some socks but he can fit us in. 116 00:07:05,727 --> 00:07:08,639 That puts me into perspective, doesn't it? 117 00:07:08,687 --> 00:07:10,643 Long way to come for socks. 118 00:07:10,687 --> 00:07:13,520 Forget the socks, hm? This is a gift from the gods. 119 00:07:13,567 --> 00:07:15,683 Mi meets Li, Li impresses Mike. 120 00:07:15,727 --> 00:07:19,766 Mike flies back to Cy, Cy rings Li and we're away. Be positive. 121 00:07:19,807 --> 00:07:25,245 So, how long have I got to write this treatment thing? 122 00:07:25,287 --> 00:07:27,084 Bags of time, Li. 123 00:07:27,127 --> 00:07:29,004 Mike doesn't get in till Tuesday. 124 00:07:43,167 --> 00:07:45,601 - Morning, Sandy. - Morning. 125 00:07:45,647 --> 00:07:48,115 It won't work, you know. 126 00:07:49,447 --> 00:07:51,836 - What won't? - Starting to get in on time. 127 00:07:51,887 --> 00:07:55,118 - It's too late to get the new branch now. - Oh, ha-ha. 128 00:07:55,167 --> 00:07:58,204 - Why are you on time? - The tension at breakfast. 129 00:07:58,247 --> 00:08:01,444 I couldn't stand it so I just had some coffee and ran. 130 00:08:01,487 --> 00:08:04,524 They haven't had another of their rows, have they? 131 00:08:04,567 --> 00:08:08,446 What do you mean, another of their rows? Oh, yeah, I see what you mean. 132 00:08:08,487 --> 00:08:13,163 No, Lionel's got to write a treatment about him and Mum 38 years ago. 133 00:08:13,207 --> 00:08:16,802 Alistair's busy persuading America to turn it into a miniseries. 134 00:08:16,847 --> 00:08:20,442 That's great! Why should that produce tension at breakfast? 135 00:08:20,487 --> 00:08:23,126 - He's got till tomorrow to do it. - Oh, yes? 136 00:08:23,167 --> 00:08:25,283 - Says who? - Cy somebody. 137 00:08:25,327 --> 00:08:28,239 - Oh, I see, yes. - I'll explain later. 138 00:08:28,287 --> 00:08:31,165 - I've got to do these expenses. - Your mum does those. 139 00:08:31,207 --> 00:08:34,358 - She's gonna be late. - She's interviewing at 11:00. 140 00:08:34,407 --> 00:08:37,604 - You're not doing that as well, are you? - No, I'm not. 141 00:08:37,647 --> 00:08:41,879 And don't look so horrified at the thought. No, Mum will be in by then. 142 00:08:41,927 --> 00:08:46,762 - She was just hanging on to help Lionel. - Oh. How are they getting on? 143 00:08:46,807 --> 00:08:50,959 Not very well. When I left they hadn't even thought of a title. 144 00:08:52,047 --> 00:08:54,402 - Good luck. - Thanks. 145 00:08:55,847 --> 00:08:58,281 What about Strangers In The Park? 146 00:08:58,327 --> 00:09:00,761 Sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock film. 147 00:09:00,807 --> 00:09:03,116 Yes. 148 00:09:03,967 --> 00:09:06,686 - Lovers In The Park? - No. 149 00:09:06,727 --> 00:09:09,002 No. I've got to go. 150 00:09:09,047 --> 00:09:10,958 You'll do it. 151 00:09:23,127 --> 00:09:25,197 Perhaps I should call it Psycho. 152 00:09:28,247 --> 00:09:32,445 I'm sorry, Mum... erm... Miss Pargetter must have got held up. 153 00:09:32,487 --> 00:09:35,365 - I'm sure she won't be long. - I do hope not. 154 00:09:35,407 --> 00:09:37,523 Well, I'm sure she won't. 155 00:09:37,567 --> 00:09:40,639 Can I get you something to drink? Tea or coffee? 156 00:09:40,687 --> 00:09:45,283 No, I'd like a mineral water, please. Still, with ice and a twist of lemon. 157 00:09:46,327 --> 00:09:50,286 Right. Well, I'll just go and see what I can do. 158 00:09:55,687 --> 00:10:00,238 Miss Curtis would like a mineral water, still, with ice and a twist of lemon. 159 00:10:00,287 --> 00:10:03,245 If you ask me, what Miss Curtis wants is a... 160 00:10:03,287 --> 00:10:07,678 - Well, we're not a cocktail bar. - I'll just go over the road and get one. 161 00:10:07,727 --> 00:10:10,161 Did she specify any particular sort of glass? 162 00:10:10,207 --> 00:10:13,756 - Oh, you're not being very fair. - I know. 163 00:10:13,807 --> 00:10:16,765 - I bet her tights never ladder. - Ooh, never. 164 00:10:19,007 --> 00:10:21,919 - You're late. - I know. The Westway's jammed. 165 00:10:21,967 --> 00:10:24,401 - You're limping. - I know. 166 00:10:24,447 --> 00:10:26,802 - Morning, boss. - Morning. 167 00:10:26,847 --> 00:10:29,281 - Oh... - Why are you limping? 168 00:10:29,327 --> 00:10:32,524 I gave up on the cab and ran the last bit. My heel's come off. 169 00:10:32,567 --> 00:10:34,398 - Miss Curtis is waiting. - She all right? 170 00:10:34,447 --> 00:10:36,756 - Very together. - Oh, good. 171 00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:39,917 Oh. Miss Curtis. 172 00:10:39,967 --> 00:10:43,243 Jean Pargetter. So sorry to have kept you waiting. 173 00:10:43,287 --> 00:10:47,917 The Westway is jammed solid and my heel came off my shoe. 174 00:10:47,967 --> 00:10:50,481 Wouldn't you just know it? 175 00:10:50,527 --> 00:10:52,722 - Which way did you come? - The Westway. 176 00:10:53,727 --> 00:10:54,716 Oh. 177 00:10:54,767 --> 00:10:58,999 I checked the traffic update on the radio and allowed myself plenty of time. 178 00:10:59,047 --> 00:11:00,924 Oh. Good for you. 179 00:11:01,887 --> 00:11:05,163 - Would you like a drink? - I've already ordered one, thank you. 180 00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:09,246 Oh, right. Oh, right. 181 00:11:14,167 --> 00:11:16,044 There we are. 182 00:11:16,087 --> 00:11:19,523 Well, you know what the job's all about. 183 00:11:21,487 --> 00:11:24,559 - I must say your CV's very impressive. - Thank you. 184 00:11:25,647 --> 00:11:27,797 Oh, where is it now? 185 00:11:28,847 --> 00:11:33,045 Er... Oh, yes, of course. In my briefcase. 186 00:11:36,967 --> 00:11:40,562 Oh. Erm... pickle. 187 00:11:41,967 --> 00:11:44,162 - Pickle? - Yes. 188 00:11:44,207 --> 00:11:47,961 My chap made me a quick sandwich for lunch 189 00:11:48,007 --> 00:11:50,237 and it must have come unopened. 190 00:11:50,287 --> 00:11:52,926 - Cheese and pickle. - I see. 191 00:11:54,287 --> 00:11:57,677 - I'm sorry about your CV. - No, don't worry. It's only a photocopy. 192 00:11:57,727 --> 00:12:02,323 Oh, good. Good. Well, erm... Sally. 193 00:12:02,367 --> 00:12:06,838 As I said, your CV's very impressive. 194 00:12:06,887 --> 00:12:08,559 (Sally) Thank you. 195 00:12:11,727 --> 00:12:13,638 Erm... Business Studies at Harvard? 196 00:12:13,687 --> 00:12:16,076 I thought they were the best. 197 00:12:16,127 --> 00:12:18,243 Yes, quite. Erm... 198 00:12:18,287 --> 00:12:23,839 I don't quite see the relevance of a National Diploma in Design at Goldsmiths. 199 00:12:23,887 --> 00:12:26,162 I just did it for fun, really. 200 00:12:26,207 --> 00:12:27,799 Oh, right. 201 00:12:27,847 --> 00:12:30,520 - Your mineral water. - Thank you. 202 00:12:30,567 --> 00:12:35,038 Judy, be a love. Pop this round the corner and see if they can put the heel back on. 203 00:12:35,087 --> 00:12:38,318 - Now where is the heel? - I don't know. 204 00:12:38,367 --> 00:12:41,086 - Briefcase? - Oh, yes, of course. 205 00:12:41,127 --> 00:12:43,083 The briefcase. 206 00:12:45,647 --> 00:12:47,638 Oh. 207 00:12:48,167 --> 00:12:52,046 - It's pickle. - Yes, it's, erm... It's pickle. 208 00:13:02,887 --> 00:13:04,878 - (Jean) Hello. - Hello. 209 00:13:08,647 --> 00:13:12,356 - I got covered in pickle today. - How did you manage that? 210 00:13:12,407 --> 00:13:14,716 You didn't wrap the sandwiches properly. 211 00:13:14,767 --> 00:13:16,678 - I thought I did. - Well, you didn't. 212 00:13:18,127 --> 00:13:22,200 - You couldn't have got covered in pickle. - Well, I got it all over my hand. 213 00:13:22,247 --> 00:13:23,805 I'm sorry. 214 00:13:23,847 --> 00:13:28,398 Oh, no, I'm sorry, bursting in like that and going on about the pickle. 215 00:13:28,447 --> 00:13:31,200 - How's it going? - I've done three pages. 216 00:13:31,247 --> 00:13:33,477 - That's not much. - That's how it's going. 217 00:13:33,527 --> 00:13:37,645 - Why aren't you using the word processor? - It won't make me think any faster. 218 00:13:37,687 --> 00:13:39,962 In any case, those things are beyond me. 219 00:13:40,007 --> 00:13:42,601 - Would you like a drink? - I'd better not. 220 00:13:42,647 --> 00:13:45,207 I've got a feeling it's going to be a long night. 221 00:13:45,247 --> 00:13:47,681 - What's the problem? - Would you like a list? 222 00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:49,240 The main problem, then. 223 00:13:49,287 --> 00:13:52,245 Age. It's not easy remembering what I was like at 20. 224 00:13:52,287 --> 00:13:54,118 I thought you were lovely. 225 00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:58,683 I can hardly describe myself as a lovely second lieutenant, can I? 226 00:13:58,727 --> 00:14:01,082 What's this inset? 227 00:14:01,127 --> 00:14:03,197 It's some dialogue, remember? 228 00:14:03,247 --> 00:14:07,604 Alistair said to put in some dialogue to make Cy Liebermann drool. 229 00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:09,399 Oh. 230 00:14:09,447 --> 00:14:12,359 "Excuse me, miss, could you direct me to Curzon Street?" 231 00:14:12,407 --> 00:14:15,922 "Yes, just cross Park Lane and it's almost directly opposite." 232 00:14:15,967 --> 00:14:17,685 "Thank you." "Not at all." 233 00:14:17,727 --> 00:14:20,480 "It's sunny today." "Yes, it is. Quite warm too." 234 00:14:20,527 --> 00:14:22,563 "Yes, quite warm." 235 00:14:24,527 --> 00:14:27,485 - That's what we said. - It's not going to make him drool. 236 00:14:27,527 --> 00:14:29,563 Drop off, maybe. 237 00:14:29,607 --> 00:14:33,646 All right. Try substituting, "Hi, babe." "Hiya, big boy." 238 00:14:33,687 --> 00:14:37,521 - That's silly. - Well, it's all silly. The whole idea. 239 00:14:37,567 --> 00:14:40,365 - I mean tomorrow Mike... - Barbosa. 240 00:14:40,407 --> 00:14:45,037 He's gonna read this and think it's worth less than the socks he's coming to buy. 241 00:14:45,087 --> 00:14:48,523 You give up and I'll stuff the rest of the pickle down your shirt. 242 00:14:48,567 --> 00:14:53,846 - It's worth a go. We agreed. - All right, it's worth a go. 243 00:14:53,887 --> 00:14:57,721 I think I will have that drink. It might lubricate my memory. 244 00:14:57,767 --> 00:15:02,158 Oh, I forgot to ask. How did the interview go? 245 00:15:02,207 --> 00:15:04,118 She was intimidating. 246 00:15:04,167 --> 00:15:08,957 She looked like a fashion plate, had endless qualifications and made me feel about 150. 247 00:15:09,007 --> 00:15:12,795 - A scruffy 150-year-old. - You didn't like her? 248 00:15:12,847 --> 00:15:16,317 Well, I don't have to like her. 249 00:15:16,367 --> 00:15:19,962 She'll be working in another building. Until the coup, that is. 250 00:15:20,007 --> 00:15:23,204 - It'll take about six months. - Did you give her the job? 251 00:15:23,247 --> 00:15:26,444 Well, not straightaway. 252 00:15:26,487 --> 00:15:31,277 - I will, probably. I said I'd let her know. - That's the idea. Make her sweat a bit. 253 00:15:31,327 --> 00:15:34,080 I don't think so. She said could it be within 24 hours 254 00:15:34,127 --> 00:15:36,595 as she had a lot of other interviews lined up. 255 00:15:36,647 --> 00:15:37,796 (Laughs) 256 00:15:37,847 --> 00:15:42,159 - You better get going. I'll do the dinner. - Yes, you're right. 257 00:15:42,207 --> 00:15:47,156 I'll tell you what, I categorically refuse to go into any details about sex. 258 00:15:47,207 --> 00:15:49,277 - Whose sex? - Ours. 259 00:15:49,327 --> 00:15:54,481 I wouldn't be too categorical. We watch a lot of miniseries. A little bit of sex never hurts. 260 00:15:54,527 --> 00:15:59,203 - I'm not telling the world what we got up to. - It wouldn't be us. It'd be just two people. 261 00:15:59,247 --> 00:16:04,002 Well, in that case, I'll put in the bit about the airing cupboard. 262 00:16:04,047 --> 00:16:06,356 What airing cupboard? 263 00:16:07,447 --> 00:16:08,960 Don't you remember? 264 00:16:10,407 --> 00:16:13,319 Oh! (Laughs) 265 00:16:13,367 --> 00:16:15,961 Oh, yes. Well, get writing. 266 00:16:16,007 --> 00:16:18,521 I can't do it now. We haven't even held hands yet. 267 00:16:20,047 --> 00:16:22,561 No, Mr Coleman, that's absolutely no problem. 268 00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:26,316 We'll have a senior executive with you within the hour. I promise. 269 00:16:26,367 --> 00:16:28,483 Thank you. Bye. 270 00:16:29,407 --> 00:16:34,197 Old man Coleman is kicking up a stink. That Caroline didn't turn up again today. 271 00:16:34,247 --> 00:16:36,715 I promised him a senior executive. 272 00:16:36,767 --> 00:16:40,157 - Judy. - I'm not a senior executive. 273 00:16:40,207 --> 00:16:42,960 True but you have very winning ways. Off you go. 274 00:16:43,007 --> 00:16:45,362 I'm a martyr, that's what I am. 275 00:16:46,047 --> 00:16:48,356 Right. Coleman. 276 00:16:49,767 --> 00:16:52,122 - Oh, yes. - (Jean) What are you doing? 277 00:16:52,167 --> 00:16:55,603 - I'm gonna swot up on this in the taxi. - What is it? 278 00:16:55,647 --> 00:16:59,481 Model aeroplanes. Old man Coleman is mad about modern aeroplanes. 279 00:16:59,527 --> 00:17:03,600 - Clever girl. - Yeah, well, I'll be off then. 280 00:17:03,647 --> 00:17:07,117 - Any news from Lionel? - He was trying to finish it when I left. 281 00:17:07,167 --> 00:17:09,362 - The air was rather blue. - Oh, dear. 282 00:17:09,407 --> 00:17:11,637 - Oh, well, I'll see you later. - Bye. 283 00:17:11,687 --> 00:17:15,600 Oh, yes, don't forget to ring Miss Ice Cubes. 284 00:17:15,647 --> 00:17:18,207 You could have had that branch, Sandy. 285 00:17:18,247 --> 00:17:20,556 I know. But I like it here. 286 00:17:20,607 --> 00:17:23,724 Don't ask me why but I do. 287 00:17:23,767 --> 00:17:28,682 Miss Ice Cubes, you know, will be about as popular as a fox in a chicken run. 288 00:17:28,727 --> 00:17:31,002 You don't have to be loved to run a business. 289 00:17:31,047 --> 00:17:33,766 Oh, I know that. 290 00:17:33,807 --> 00:17:35,604 I've done it. 291 00:17:35,647 --> 00:17:40,846 Alistair phoned. We're having lunch with this Mike Barbosa on a boat. 292 00:17:40,887 --> 00:17:44,038 - He hasn't hired the QEII, has he? - I wouldn't be surprised. 293 00:17:44,087 --> 00:17:46,521 I wondered if Sandy could run off some copies. 294 00:17:46,567 --> 00:17:48,637 - Yes, of course. - Thanks. 295 00:17:48,687 --> 00:17:52,885 - Oh. It's in a bit of a mess, isn't it? - Probably in every sense of the word. 296 00:17:52,927 --> 00:17:56,636 Why don't I put this onto the word processor? It won't take an hour. 297 00:17:56,687 --> 00:18:00,839 I haven't got an hour. I hung on till the last minute trying to come up with a title. 298 00:18:00,887 --> 00:18:03,799 I've called it A Tale Of Two People. 299 00:18:04,887 --> 00:18:07,037 Oh. 300 00:18:09,567 --> 00:18:12,001 It's the best I could think of. 301 00:18:12,047 --> 00:18:14,607 I'll go and do your copies. 302 00:18:14,647 --> 00:18:18,686 - This lunch. You won't be aggressive, will you? - Of course not. 303 00:18:18,727 --> 00:18:20,080 - Or surly? - Or surly. 304 00:18:20,127 --> 00:18:23,085 - Just think of the money. - If I thought it was worth any, I would. 305 00:18:23,127 --> 00:18:27,120 The copier's all set. Just put the sheets in the tray and press the red button. 306 00:18:27,167 --> 00:18:29,158 - I'll give you a hand. - Oh, thanks. 307 00:18:29,207 --> 00:18:32,995 - (Phone) - Oh, wouldn't you know? 308 00:18:33,047 --> 00:18:36,084 Hello. Oh, Mr Downton. 309 00:18:36,127 --> 00:18:39,324 Yes. Oh, that's interesting. 310 00:18:39,367 --> 00:18:41,278 Yes. Will you just hold on a minute? 311 00:18:41,327 --> 00:18:45,002 Just put the sheets in the tray and press the red button. You can do that. 312 00:18:45,047 --> 00:18:49,643 - I'm not an imbecile. - Hello, Mr Downton, I'm so sorry. 313 00:18:49,687 --> 00:18:53,726 If you could just hold for a minute, I think it's on Miss Pargetter's desk. 314 00:18:53,767 --> 00:18:58,238 - Just put the sheets in the tray... - And press the red button, I know. 315 00:18:58,287 --> 00:19:00,118 Oh, no, no. I'll pay. 316 00:19:00,167 --> 00:19:03,045 Oh, well. That's very nice of you. 317 00:19:03,087 --> 00:19:07,160 - If you insist, yes. - (Sandy) Hello? I know what's happened. 318 00:19:07,207 --> 00:19:10,199 Wednesday? Yes, 1:00. The Pomme D'Amour. 319 00:19:10,247 --> 00:19:13,922 I'll put the current one in the post to you today. 320 00:19:13,967 --> 00:19:18,916 - Yes, I look forward to seeing you. Right, bye. - That's no problem at all. 321 00:19:18,967 --> 00:19:21,435 - The Pomme D'Amour. - Yes, he likes me. 322 00:19:21,487 --> 00:19:24,001 - Is everything all right? - Yes, fine. 323 00:19:25,207 --> 00:19:27,516 When do the copies come out? 324 00:19:33,087 --> 00:19:34,964 What? What? 325 00:19:36,007 --> 00:19:38,282 Oh, Lionel! 326 00:19:42,367 --> 00:19:45,325 - Will you slow down? - It's bad manners to be late. 327 00:19:45,367 --> 00:19:48,916 Well, it's better than arriving on the dot all hot and sweaty. 328 00:19:50,727 --> 00:19:54,163 - You don't have to stop altogether. - Let's not go at all. 329 00:19:54,207 --> 00:19:56,846 I'm not even supposed to be here in the first place. 330 00:19:56,887 --> 00:19:59,003 I'm not going instead of you. 331 00:19:59,047 --> 00:20:01,117 You're better at talking than me. 332 00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:04,796 Good God. Fancy having to tell a treatment. 333 00:20:04,847 --> 00:20:08,522 It's either that or handing him strips of paper and a pot of glue. 334 00:20:08,567 --> 00:20:13,277 - Oh, come on. It's worth a try. - I think we're here, actually. 335 00:20:14,287 --> 00:20:16,960 Queen Mary? Oh, that looks nice. 336 00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:19,601 So did the Titanic. 337 00:20:23,527 --> 00:20:26,519 Hey, hey. Two creative minds for the price of one. 338 00:20:26,567 --> 00:20:29,127 - I hope you don't mind. - It was a machine, you see. 339 00:20:29,167 --> 00:20:32,842 No probs. Let me introduce you. Jean, Mike, Mike, Jean. 340 00:20:32,887 --> 00:20:36,436 - Mike Barbosa. How are you doing? - Mike, Lionel, Lionel, Mike. 341 00:20:36,487 --> 00:20:40,685 How are you? I'm good and I'm eagerly anticipating reading your treatment. 342 00:20:40,727 --> 00:20:44,322 Well, er... let's sit, shall we? 343 00:20:48,567 --> 00:20:52,116 So folks, shall we have a drink before we trough? Jean? 344 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:54,556 Oh, I could kill for a gin and tonic. 345 00:20:54,607 --> 00:20:56,677 Scotch, please. A large one. 346 00:20:56,727 --> 00:20:59,161 - Mike. - Mineral water, please. 347 00:20:59,207 --> 00:21:02,916 - Yes, make that two mineral waters, please. - Yes, sir. 348 00:21:04,927 --> 00:21:08,124 - Did you get your socks, Mike? - I surely did, Jean, thank you. 349 00:21:08,167 --> 00:21:11,523 You know, nobody makes socks quite like the Brits. 350 00:21:11,567 --> 00:21:14,604 We think of it as almost an art form. 351 00:21:14,647 --> 00:21:17,605 - How's Cy, Mike? - Tremendously excited. 352 00:21:17,647 --> 00:21:21,720 Before I left he said to me, "Mike, bring me back a winner." 353 00:21:21,767 --> 00:21:24,076 - Not socks? - Excuse me? 354 00:21:24,127 --> 00:21:27,085 - It was a joke. - Oh, I see. 355 00:21:27,127 --> 00:21:30,722 And a winner is what we think we have for you. What am I saying? "Think"? 356 00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:33,520 - We are certain. - Great. 357 00:21:33,567 --> 00:21:38,004 Now, with your permission, I'd very much like to read the treatment before we eat. 358 00:21:40,047 --> 00:21:42,515 There isn't a treatment. 359 00:21:42,567 --> 00:21:44,000 Alistair? 360 00:21:45,167 --> 00:21:47,044 Lionel? 361 00:21:47,087 --> 00:21:50,363 I'm not technical, you see. I never have been. 362 00:21:50,407 --> 00:21:55,481 I don't know one machine from another, and a red button's a red button in anyone's language. 363 00:21:55,527 --> 00:21:58,564 Thank goodness I don't work at Cape Canaveral. 364 00:21:58,607 --> 00:22:05,604 What Lionel's saying is that words are so bland on a page, aren't they? 365 00:22:05,647 --> 00:22:12,439 I mean, this is a story about love and hopes and fears and sadness. 366 00:22:12,487 --> 00:22:16,241 And Lionel would really prefer to tell you it himself. 367 00:22:16,287 --> 00:22:20,121 - A pitch? - Er... yes. Yes, a pitch. 368 00:22:20,167 --> 00:22:22,044 - What pitch? - You to me, Lionel. 369 00:22:22,087 --> 00:22:24,043 Come on, let's here that story. 370 00:22:24,087 --> 00:22:27,045 Oh, that sort of pitch. Right. 371 00:22:27,087 --> 00:22:30,045 Yes. Right. 372 00:22:30,087 --> 00:22:32,157 Thank you. 373 00:22:36,327 --> 00:22:38,887 Well... 374 00:22:39,807 --> 00:22:41,877 - Once upon a time... - In 1954. 375 00:22:41,927 --> 00:22:44,999 In 1954. I was coming to that. 376 00:22:45,047 --> 00:22:50,485 Well, in 1954... Are you sure you really want to hear this? 377 00:22:55,127 --> 00:22:57,595 I cried and cried when I didn't hear from Lionel. 378 00:22:57,647 --> 00:22:59,797 Damned British Armed Forces Post Office. 379 00:22:59,847 --> 00:23:02,759 Of all the letters they had to lose, it had to be mine. 380 00:23:02,807 --> 00:23:06,322 So you see, I thought that Lionel had never written to me from Korea. 381 00:23:06,367 --> 00:23:08,642 And I thought Jean hadn't written back. 382 00:23:08,687 --> 00:23:13,363 And we were both too proud and too incredibly stupid to do anything about it. 383 00:23:14,687 --> 00:23:16,962 End of story. 384 00:23:18,007 --> 00:23:19,156 That's all. 385 00:23:19,207 --> 00:23:21,801 All? 386 00:23:21,847 --> 00:23:24,236 This is Hemingway. 387 00:23:24,287 --> 00:23:27,518 This is Hecht. This is... 388 00:23:27,567 --> 00:23:30,001 - AA Milne? - AA Milne! 389 00:23:30,047 --> 00:23:32,686 - It has laughter. Tears. - Sex. 390 00:23:32,727 --> 00:23:34,877 - Sex! - We skated over that. 391 00:23:34,927 --> 00:23:38,124 Lionel, ice can cover a very deep pond. 392 00:23:38,167 --> 00:23:42,718 Does this ship have a fax? I have to get this back to Cy while it's still burning in my brain. 393 00:23:42,767 --> 00:23:44,997 Let's find out, Mike. Let's find out. 394 00:23:46,527 --> 00:23:49,246 Hey, just a minute. 395 00:23:50,447 --> 00:23:53,519 - Does this thing have a title? - Well... 396 00:23:53,567 --> 00:23:56,400 - It's just two people, really. - Just Two People! 397 00:23:56,447 --> 00:23:59,678 My God, that's great! Fax! 398 00:24:03,927 --> 00:24:07,158 - Hope they hurry up. I'm hungry. - Is that all you've got to say? 399 00:24:07,207 --> 00:24:09,357 Oh. Yes, thank you. 400 00:24:09,407 --> 00:24:13,844 No, no! Aren't you excited? Mike's crazy about it. 401 00:24:13,887 --> 00:24:16,037 He's impressionable. He's only 15. 402 00:24:16,087 --> 00:24:18,237 He's faxing Cy! 403 00:24:18,287 --> 00:24:21,916 - Who's probably only 16. - I don't care if he's still in nappies. 404 00:24:21,967 --> 00:24:25,437 They've got power, these people. You must be a bit excited. 405 00:24:26,567 --> 00:24:30,526 All right, I am. But I'm hungry as well. 406 00:24:33,447 --> 00:24:36,325 (Sings) Hooray for Hollywood... 407 00:24:38,207 --> 00:24:40,277 I do wish you'd stop singing that. 408 00:24:40,327 --> 00:24:42,966 - You'll be there this time tomorrow. - What about the time difference? 409 00:24:43,007 --> 00:24:46,238 Well, this time yesterday, then. Or the day after. 410 00:24:46,287 --> 00:24:50,041 Either way, you going to Los Angeles to see Cy. 411 00:24:50,087 --> 00:24:52,555 If I don't get murdered on the way to his office. 412 00:24:52,607 --> 00:24:57,840 There are more murders in a day in Los Angeles than there are in a year in the whole of China. 413 00:24:57,887 --> 00:25:01,323 - I don't believe a word of that. - Well, there are lots. 414 00:25:01,367 --> 00:25:04,279 - Will you be taking this? - Certainly not. 415 00:25:04,327 --> 00:25:06,397 Raincoat? No, you won't need a raincoat. 416 00:25:06,447 --> 00:25:09,678 - Shall I help you with your packing? - I'm not coming. 417 00:25:09,727 --> 00:25:12,685 - What? - I'm not coming. 418 00:25:12,727 --> 00:25:16,356 But Mike said you could. He's reserved two seats. 419 00:25:16,407 --> 00:25:18,523 I'm not just coming as a hanger-on. 420 00:25:18,567 --> 00:25:21,639 It may have escaped your notice but I have a business to run. 421 00:25:21,687 --> 00:25:24,440 - I think it's time you eased off a bit. - Eased off? 422 00:25:24,487 --> 00:25:28,400 I'm not past it, you know. I'm not ready to be put out to pasture yet. 423 00:25:28,447 --> 00:25:32,645 I didn't say you were but you've got all these young people. Judith, Sandy... No. 424 00:25:32,687 --> 00:25:35,838 Sandy, and now Miss Ice Cubes. 425 00:25:35,887 --> 00:25:37,684 Curtis. Sally Curtis. 426 00:25:37,727 --> 00:25:40,764 And they're not just wonderful cos they're young. 427 00:25:40,807 --> 00:25:44,720 - You said she intimidated you. - I said she was intimidating. 428 00:25:44,767 --> 00:25:47,406 You said she made you feel 150. 429 00:25:47,447 --> 00:25:50,598 Yes, well, that's true. She does. But that's the point. 430 00:25:50,647 --> 00:25:55,960 If a writer goes to Hollywood with a woman she's meant to be in her mid-20s, pencil thin, 431 00:25:56,007 --> 00:25:58,521 wants nothing more than to sit round the pool 432 00:25:58,567 --> 00:26:01,081 and have no other opinion than the temperature of the water. 433 00:26:01,127 --> 00:26:05,245 - I don't fit that bill. - Well, you fit my bill. 434 00:26:05,287 --> 00:26:08,836 What would I do with a girl like that, anyway? 435 00:26:10,487 --> 00:26:15,845 Put it this way. If this thing ever does get beyond people saying "Great" and "Hemingway", 436 00:26:15,887 --> 00:26:19,323 - you're part of the story. - Yes but they want you to write it. 437 00:26:19,367 --> 00:26:23,076 - And don't say, "More fool they." - Then think of it as a holiday. 438 00:26:23,127 --> 00:26:27,518 Oh, Lionel, this is the first year that I've actually looked forward to a holiday. 439 00:26:27,567 --> 00:26:29,398 - Well, then. - Let me finish. 440 00:26:29,447 --> 00:26:35,204 But I hope it'll just be you and I, not you at meetings all day and me sitting around the pool. 441 00:26:35,247 --> 00:26:37,283 I see. 442 00:26:38,487 --> 00:26:42,526 Don't look like that. This is a chance for you. It's yours. 443 00:26:43,887 --> 00:26:46,845 - Will you come or not? - No. 444 00:26:48,167 --> 00:26:52,604 I'll just get my toilet bag. I'll see you, then. 445 00:26:52,647 --> 00:26:56,526 Well, as you're only going to the bathroom, you're bound to. 446 00:27:00,767 --> 00:27:02,325 (Sighs) 447 00:27:14,927 --> 00:27:17,316 - Where to, sir? - Oblivion, probably. 448 00:27:17,367 --> 00:27:20,200 - Sorry? - Los Angeles, then. 449 00:27:20,247 --> 00:27:22,283 Thank you. 450 00:27:29,087 --> 00:27:30,884 (Woman on PA)... at any time. 451 00:27:30,927 --> 00:27:34,840 Unattended baggage will be removed and may be destroyed. 452 00:27:51,807 --> 00:27:54,162 Well, I am wearing mine, all right? 453 00:28:03,407 --> 00:28:06,126 # You must remember this 454 00:28:06,167 --> 00:28:08,727 # A kiss is still a kiss 455 00:28:08,767 --> 00:28:12,157 # A sigh is just a sigh 456 00:28:14,127 --> 00:28:17,881 # The fundamental things apply 457 00:28:17,927 --> 00:28:21,681 # As time goes by 458 00:28:24,927 --> 00:28:27,680 # And when two lovers woo 459 00:28:27,727 --> 00:28:30,480 # They still say I love you 460 00:28:30,527 --> 00:28:33,439 # On that you can rely 461 00:28:36,047 --> 00:28:40,404 # The world will always welcome lovers 462 00:28:41,687 --> 00:28:49,480 # As time goes by # 38647

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