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Can you hear me?
Are you actually sure we're in the right place, Dad?
I haven't seen any deer signs at all.
I told you.
I've never been here before.
So wait till I check.
Will you please stop with that map at this hour?
God, we were meant to have been here in the daytime and... Well, let's just say
we're a tad bit late.
Don't worry.
We'll get to do some hunting tomorrow.
Okay?
The time that I got is lost.
Let's get some sleep tonight and wake up early tomorrow, okay?
Right.
But you do know I have to be back at six tomorrow for that date.
How could I forget?
Is this the only thing we talked about?
You're just jealous.
Sure, James.
Sure.
Right.
I'm going to try and get some sleep and socialize with you.
Nice Oh snapchat you
make me so happy
Jesus Christ, Dad!
Wake up, James.
Wake the fuck up.
Who is that?
You mean what happened to him?
Is that blood?
I think so.
Are you okay?
I was stopping in the woods when me and my friends were attacked.
Attacked by who?
Is that your blood?
No, that is my friend's blood.
Where is your friend?
All of them are dead.
Dead? Yes.
My name is Boris, and I am from Georgia.
Only here a few days since this fucking happened.
Who attacked you, Boris?
Someone wearing the mask.
He was so strong, we did not ever see him.
He dressed us like in black.
In black?
Yes.
Help!
What are you going to do?
Who is that? Help!
Who is that?
No.
Don't. Don't move.
You've got to be fucking kidding me now. What's wrong with this?
Tell me that I've lost my
How long is this boat trip then?
I think it's set about three hours.
What?
Yeah, I know.
Did I ever tell you I get seasick on boats?
This isn't a boat.
Huh?
Well, on boats you can move around a fair bit of.
Straight with the yacht.
It's a lot smaller than a boat.
You're shitting me.
Oh, I'm deadly serious.
So, how are the girls?
Um, well, Jessica told me she was going to meet Lucy over there earlier.
And, uh, how did they get over?
Your guess is as good as mine.
So, I was looking up on the map this place Greenwood, and there doesn't seem
be a lot to do there.
Uh, what do you expect it to have?
Oh, oh, let me guess, let me guess, let me guess.
Water park?
Disneyland? It's a fucking forest on a small fucking island.
And there's no cinema either, David.
Dumbass.
What makes this Greenwood so special?
I don't know.
Tourists love this place.
Do we even have a tour guide?
Do we even have a tour guide?
I'm the fucking tour guide.
We're so fucked.
Exactly.
Fuck it.
Give me a joint.
I'm going to show you heaven.
Shit, give me two.
I'm going to show you hell, bitches.
Look, we better head over and wait, see what this bone is.
What do you reckon?
Yeah.
So, what's up?
Listen, what the hell is going on?
I've done all the work.
I've done everything you asked me to do.
Or what?
You think you're going to take this away from me?
You slimy son of a bitch.
After all my work, I'm always supposed to do it all.
You really fucked it up this time.
Listen.
I won't let you do this.
Do you know who I am?
Do you know what I'm capable of doing?
If I was you, I'd watch your back.
Son of a bitch.
Wait till I get you.
Wait!
Everything okay, Freddie?
Yeah.
That can't be good.
And I know that's not really possible, but the pain.
Anything? Not a bit.
You ok out here, dude?
What now?
Well, it's going to be dark in a few hours, so maybe it's best we wait till
morning and then go try.
Man, the size of this forest.
I mean, do you seriously think that we're going to have a chance of finding
them?
You're right.
So, we have a guys weekend then?
Nah, exactly.
Look, if we see them, we see them. If we don't, we don't.
There's one thing for sure. I'm not going back over that fucking bridge when
have to.
You broke my neck on that fucking thing.
That was funny.
Not for me.
You're tripping the fuck out of me. No.
No.
We have beers, right?
Yeah, I have them in my bag.
Yeah, I have them in my bag.
Bit early, no?
We're on holidays, dude.
You reckon they're still cold?
Nah, but they'll do.
So what's the plan for tomorrow then?
Well, I'll definitely go for a nice swim in the morning.
Like, I know I've seen a stream back there, but I also hear there's a nice
the other side of the woods, which I definitely want to go check out.
What do you reckon?
Yeah.
I'm getting high as fuck.
Really? Oh, yes.
Well, I'm probably just going to get some footage around this place.
This place looks actually awesome.
Hope we see some crazy -ass shit in the next few days.
Like a butcher's redneck's fucking hood.
Hey, if it happens, it happens.
Sick, boy.
So you didn't happen to come across any females by any chance
What I mean is, like, they're our friends and we can't seem to find them.
Right. Well, there was some yesterday, but that's, like, like a day trip away.
Other end of the forest, like.
A little blonde one?
Uh, yeah. Yeah, pretty blonde.
Named Jessica?
I don't know. We didn't really get any names, man. We were just passing by.
Um, we did meet this one guy called, uh, Lenny, though?
Don't know him.
Hmm. Bill.
We know the story.
You guys want a drink?
Oh, no, no, we've got to hit the trailer.
Busy.
Safe travels, guys.
Nice to meet you.
It's like a day's trek.
Why don't you just wait for us and we all go together?
No sex at the weekend for us though!
Fuck it, we're here now. Might as well enjoy ourselves.
No sex at the weekend for us though.
Oh piss off!
And why are you videoing?
I'm taking in the scenery, man. It's kind of what we're here for.
The scenery?
Uh, okay.
You see the way we're kind of a little bit lost?
Well, if you're worried about that, why don't you just check the map?
Okay. You see the way I'm carrying a big bag?
Yeah. You see the way it's probably got my clothes and that in it?
Yeah, yeah, because of my bad knee.
Yeah, because you can't carry stuff because of the bad knee.
You were meant to bring the map.
I'm sorry? I thought you were supposed to bring the map.
Oh my god.
Map is kind of a part of everything, you know?
Sorry, dude. You were meant to bring one thing.
At least I remembered the food.
The food is nothing. It's like noodles and stuff, mate.
Alright, alright.
Let's just have a bit of fun while we're out here, okay?
Don't worry about it.
Don't worry about it? It's... How are we meant to find our way around?
If we keep walking straight, we'll probably get out of the woods.
Yeah.
I guess, but like... Just come on. Just come on. Come on. Yeah,
sure.
Lead the way.
Come on.
Whoa!
Um... Let's go this way.
No, this way. Whoa!
All right, all right. Have it your way, man.
So, anyways, I got a car to come to Greenwood and do this little film,
half of people.
Now, in all fairness, it wasn't my cup of tea, but I read half the script and
was all right.
And then it was fucking real, like. I didn't expect the lads now to go killing
people, but I'm fucking into it. It's actually pretty good. So, anyways, I was
chasing this fella, big -headed fella, and he was quite fast.
Now, in fairness... I have to go back on the treadmill and all that, because in
fairness, this wood's a fucking beak.
Anyways, come here, come here, come here. I want to close up. Close up,
up, close up, close up. That's too fucking close. Will you get back? Back,
back, back. Perfect.
Now, shot me. Good, good. Anyways, so listen, he keeps taking my side in
and I'm not fucking impressed. We all had this agreement. It was four
I had the two quarters.
Okay, I'm a bit greedy, but fuck him. Okay, I am... Will you excuse me now?
you shut the fuck up and die, you stupid fucking idiot?
I'd put your fucking other hand off too, you stupid cunt.
Anyways, that fucker won't die.
Anyways, I was saying about anyway, so it's Greenwood and we have to make a
short film circuit. It might take probably 25 to 35 minutes. I don't think
going to make it. And the director never even turned up. If you're listening to
this, Porrick, Porrick, you're not getting your mask back.
Okay? Fuck off.
Right? Anyways.
See, I did fucking on you.
Right? It was dead, you know.
This is the shit. This is the life.
Oh, yeah.
So relaxing.
Fucking midges everywhere.
What do you expect, dude?
We're in a forest.
How many have you had?
What?
Cans. How many cans have you had?
Oh, I... I think this is my fifth.
This is my fifth can and I feel nothing.
It's the humidity.
It's the heat.
Sure, I'm not even hot.
This is for me.
I don't feel drunk.
At all. Calling you out on my roast parade.
You left your mark, you left me open, Lord.
I definitely was right on the kitchen floor.
You're the medicine I feel to take.
A taste of you seems like a big mistake.
I swallow my pride and I'm just up to kill. Bring me joy and taste my sweetest
pills. I'll make you fucking love me.
Nope.
Well,
let's pick a spot to put up this fold -up tent.
I hope we are fit, because it's pretty small.
We're fit.
So is he, you!
We're fit.
So this is the train that's screaming.
Which way do we come over that bridge?
Why? That's our exit, dude.
Listen, we just got here. Are you ready?
No.
I just don't want to get lost.
Because then, damn, we'd be fucked.
Well, what are we stopping for?
We need a place with soft ground to set up this thing.
What do you reckon?
Well, not here anyways.
No shit, Sherlock.
Listen.
You hear that?
I heard it. Yeah.
It sounded like a scream.
Sounds like it came from that direction.
Well, what are we waiting for? Come on.
Damn. I'm all walking.
Shut up.
Come on.
Jesus Christ.
What is it?
You scared the shit out of me there.
I didn't know. So, like, I just wanted to say hello to you. Well, sure, if you
don't want to talk, that's fair enough.
You think that's funny, do you? This is my side of the woods. This is my side of
the woods.
My side.
Go your side.
Oh, relax, like. See ya. I'll see ya. I'll see ya. I'll see ya.
This is my side of the woods.
Fucking idiot.
This is the life.
I'd love a KFC right now, but these samples will just
have to do.
Beggars can't be choosers.
Oh, I hear you.
Hey, pass me a bottle, will you?
Sure.
Oh, yeah.
Yummy. You know, I think it's kind of cool.
Like, we're not going to have Wi -Fi for the next few days. We can actually have
a conversation.
What do you want to talk about, David?
Mmm, my favorite color is pink.
Nah, man, I'm talking about movies.
Yeah, I heard his favorite movie is...
The Burki.
Favourite film.
Ah, I give up on you two.
You hear that?
Ah, probably a wild animal.
A wild fucking animal that can talk.
What are you doing, Greenwood?
This is not a safe place to be.
You should go.
Who are you?
My name's Patrick Cullen.
I'm looking for my son.
Oh, you lose him?
Um, where were you today?
I was in here two years ago.
Two years ago?
I told you, Greenwood is not a safe place to be.
Yeah, we heard people are missing before, but it's just probably all lies.
They're not lies.
My son is here.
He might be dead, he might be alive, but he is in his woods.
This is my son.
Are you looking?
Are you looking?
Are you looking?
Hey! You need to leave us the fuck alone, though.
I'm trying to help you.
You can help us by heading in the direction of the crazy asshole prick.
Okay.
It's not safe in here.
Just go.
I'm telling you.
It's not safe.
Just go.
Listen to me.
It's not safe in here.
Poor guy.
What?
He's probably a few eggs short of a dozen.
You figure.
Definitely one or two eggs missing there.
I
think
I'd wait till the morning to do this.
Jason, is that you?
What do you want?
What are you doing?
Are you masturbating?
Masturbating?
Yeah,
I'm having a wank, so can you give me a few minutes?
Are you really having this? Yes, actually I am. You son of a bitch!
Alright, you just keep doing what you're doing man.
You better delete that shit!
Why can't this place have any toilets?
Is it too much to ask for?
Don't do this at home kids!
Hello?
Anyone there?
Seriously? Can a guy not have a shit in the woods without someone messing
around?
I need some Jason time here.
Hey!
Freddy!
This ain't funny, man.
Okay.
This is...
Please don't prick me in the head with a piece of wood.
What the fuck's like?
Not cool.
I mean a bit of maturity is needed here.
Who the fuck plays a game where you hit someone in the head with a piece of
wood?
Not cool at all.
God help the person when I find them.
I'm so pissed off.
The bell hit me.
What?
One of you hit me in the head with a piece of wood.
I am so pissed off right now.
I was filming some shit on my phone.
Next thing, bang, I'm lying on the ground with a piece of wood stuck to my
Yeah, right.
I'm very fucking serious, Freddy.
We've literally been here the whole time.
Wait.
Did that actually happen?
Yes, Freddy.
Do you think I make something so stupid up?
Some motherfucker hit me in the head with a piece of wood, and God help the
fucker when I find him.
No!
Yeah, right?
I didn't think I'd see anyone in here.
Hey, what's up?
Hey, how's it going, how are you? Hey guys, nothing.
How are you doing?
Just saying, we didn't expect to see anyone out here, so it's pretty cool to
some new faces.
Just chilling, taking in the scenery.
So, are you from around here?
Not too far, but not too close either.
Okay.
Camping or what?
That's the plan.
If we can find a way back.
So, where do you recommend we go to next?
Oh, this is a really cool stream.
Back down that way. Oh, cool.
Like a 30 minute walk?
Almost.
Like the sounds of that.
What do you say?
We better go back and settle first.
Then we can do whatever.
All good?
Yeah.
Oh, nice to meet you guys. Nice to meet you.
Have a safe one. You too.
See you now. See you.
So,
what's
all these missing Greenwood posters I see?
Really? I didn't see any.
Yeah.
Some guy is missing him.
Probably killed himself or some shit.
Seriously?
Why not?
Perfect place to do it if you think about it.
Kind of like that place in Asia or China or some shit.
What?
Yeah, a forest where you go for mid -suicide.
Then yeah, there's some nut job out there in this place.
Yeah, I'm deadly serious.
This place is so huge.
And like, if someone went in and did it, they'd never be found.
Kind of like this place.
Now don't get any crazy ideas.
The only thing I'd be murdering is a nice, cool -ass can of beer.
Oh, I hear you on that one.
oh man
I'm so fucking
stoned and my legs are
literally fucking numb and
for some reason
My hand is red.
And I can really lose my food. I'm starving.
But uh, how the fuck are we gonna get out of here?
My man!
I don't know, dude, but I'm tripping as shit.
That's really nice trees.
Really green and shit.
Very nature type.
I love it.
Very nice.
Do you know what, dude?
I think I'm going to live out here.
Drive one of them rainforest gangs of shit.
I'm going to fit well in.
Kunte Kinte, Jason, Rainforest Man.
Yep, that's me.
what we should do.
We should get up and put on
our camera shit and GoPro and just run straight to the woods.
It'd be fun.
It's a good idea.
We should definitely do it.
You tired, yeah, pussy?
Actually, my feet are killing me.
Ah, poor old David.
Seriously, dude.
We have to turn around.
I'm tired.
Well, I'm not.
Oh, alright. I'm out of here.
What? Later.
Hang on.
I know a way back.
I'm not ready yet.
So you better fucking wait for me.
Dude, I'm tired.
All right.
I I need my rest. I need my rest Always always fucking
complaining, you know what you just like it a bit you score always fucking
playing it What's up your ass dude?
I'm wrecked. I just want to rest up.
No fuck off What?
What are you gonna do?
See you guys again.
Still lost.
You're sure you're not following us, no?
Oh, no.
Totally lost.
No way.
And what do you want me to do about it?
Chill, Freddy.
I hate to be a pain, but can we camp with you like this?
Of course, man.
We have our own stuff.
Yeah, no worries, man.
Wait. What if I don't want him to?
Please excuse my mate.
He's being a bit of an asshole today.
You watch him out.
Yeah. Follow me, guys.
Awesome.
I'm so excited! I've never killed anyone before! I've never killed anyone
before! I'm going to do it for the first time ever! First time ever! I'm going
to kill someone! I'm going to kill someone! I'm going to kill someone!
teacher! We'll hurry after you!
Where the hell is this thing at this date?
Not a clue, dude.
I think we're lost.
Oh, well, that's a great thing.
Here.
Which way did we come?
That way.
Great.
How long have we been walking for anyway?
I think for about an hour.
What?
An hour?
No way was it an hour.
I'm just going to be here for a backwards, mate.
I'm going to bounce you something here, alright?
Guys. Colin.
Lads, for fuck's sake.
This isn't fucking funny.
It always fucking happens to me.
I don't need them at all.
I can work on my own shit. I can... What do I do? I dance.
Go fuck them. I don't need them.
What do I start with? Put a slide?
Can't do that on grass too well.
Half -slide. Can't do that either.
Michael Jackson sort of... Do that.
Actually, okay, I need a little bit of piss.
Guys,
where's Simon?
Son of a bitch.
Simon!
What did I do to you?
Stop!
Who should have went to the bathroom back there?
Damn tackle price.
Where's the bathroom?
Twelve hours of travelling, two boat trips and no way back for a few days
An island so far from civilization
that if we end up in this shit right now Nobody can hear you scream
Welcome to
Greenwood
Shit.
Where are you?
Shit.
Jesus, Freddy!
Gotcha.
Motherfucker.
Hey.
I need to go for a shit or something.
That roll I had earlier, too much of that spicy stuff.
Well,
we are staying in the same tent tonight.
I could hold it in if you want me to.
Oh no, you go on ahead and release the beast.
Really?
What? Say what, motherfucker?
Hello?
Can anyone hear me?
For fuck's sake, where is everybody?
Jesus.
Lost in the fucking woods. Just my luck.
Fuck. Cut it.
Why the fuck? Cut it.
Why the fuck did you cut me, you stupid fuck?
Oh, shit.
Wake up. Wake up. Get up. Get the fuck up. Get up.
Get up.
Fuck you.
You stupid fucker.
Why the fuck did you cut me, you stupid fuck? Get up. Get up.
I warned you, didn't I?
Didn't I? I warned you not to sleep with me, you stupid fucker!
No!
No!
I'm not going to do it for you.
Not this shit, you fuck!
Fucking fuck!
Fuck!
What the fuck am I going to do?
What the fuck am I going to do to you now?
I warned you, didn't I?
Didn't I fucking warn you not to sleep with me?
And now look what happened.
You're dead.
How the fuck am I going to get away with this one?
Piece of shit.
Fuck it. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck. No way.
This is our plan.
My luck is changing.
Anyone there?
Here, don't you try any shit now.
I'm first cousin to Colin McGregor.
I used to train him.
I'm better.
Oh, what the fuck, dude?
Oh, fuck.
Here, look, he scared the shit out of me.
I see your ingredients a lot, man.
Look, what's with the lame -ass costume, man? Look, I know people that can make
you a kick -ass one, man.
Yeah, look, I don't know what to be asking these words, man, but, like, you
know, I'm all good for it. It's all good, man.
It's all good, like, you know, I'm game.
What's with the axe? Like, why are you... What?
No!
No! No, please, no!
What the fuck, dude?
What the fuck?
What is happening here? What have you done to me?
Help!
Help!
Help!
Hey, look. Hey, man, I don't know you, man.
I didn't do shit to you. I haven't done shit to you. I don't know you.
Jesus.
How the fuck are you still alive?
Yeah, but I'll be happy when we pack up that tent and say goodbye to this place.
What you reckon happens to them guys?
It's kind of strange how they just disappear like that, right?
You're telling me.
Possibly someone kills them.
Could happen.
Don't joke with shit like that, dude.
Or what if they may accidentally kill a guy and I was in the run?
Well, I hope the prick gets caught.
It is manslaughter.
Lock him up. Throw away the keys.
Losers.
You, uh, think like that?
Jail is for losers, Freddie.
Don't think any other way.
Really?
Yup.
Please help me! I just... Jesus!
The other guy.
Dead? Alive?
Dead.
Oh, fuck.
This way. I'm over here.
This is fucked up.
Jason, what the hell? Are you alright?
We gotta go, dude. We gotta get the fuck off this island.
What? What do you mean?
We gotta go, dude. Now!
You're starting to freak some fuck out.
What's with the blood on your hands?
You wanna know what the blood is? I'm at the final judge. That's what the
fucking blood is.
What do you mean?
I mean, I have her fucking torso in there, man. It's tucked into a bush as
she got attacked by a wild animal.
Ah, bullshit.
Fuck would I lie about something like that?
Seriously?
I gotta see this. You don't need to fucking see it, dude.
Let's get the fuck out of here now.
But what about Jessica?
She's gone, dude. She's fucking gone. Let's go.
I'm not here to hurt you
I need to get the hell out of this place I can't seem to find anyone either.
This isn't freaky at all.
Um... What would you do if you were in a low -budget Hearthstone?
Oh yeah!
Good footage.
What the hell is that?
What is this?
Is that a rabbit leg or a rabbit's foot or something?
Jesus.
That's a fresh cut.
It's like a rabbit's tail or a leg or something.
It smells bad.
Who are you?
What do you want?
What?
I hear you.
I know you're out there.
I can smell you.
Come out, come out.
Wherever you are.
When I find you...
I'm going to rip her insides out and play with them.
And then I'm going to find your loved ones and slit their throats.
Even better if you've got a cute sister or a hot mum.
I'm going to beat myself off with them.
You hear that?
I am going to kill you.
What's that?
Nothing.
Fucking chicken shit.
Hello?
Hello, is someone there?
Son, are you okay?
It's not you, Father.
It is you, son.
It is.
Where have you been?
They took me.
Who took you?
They want me to be part of their cult.
What are you saying, son?
You need to come home.
You need medical attention.
I must abide by their rules.
You need help.
I
found
my real family.
What was that?
Damn, I'm unfit.
Where am I?
Colin,
what the?
Colin, what the? What the fuck?
What happened, Colin?
We have to get you help.
What happened?
What?
Who did this?
Who did this?
Colin?
Colin?
Colin?
Colin?
Colin!
Shit.
This can't be happening.
Shit, this can't be happening.
Please don't kill me, Freddy.
I'm your friend.
I see no witnesses.
I won't kill anyone, I swear.
Don't die, Jason!
Don't die!
That's all you have to do!
I don't want to die.
Listen, I didn't see your face, so I
can't say anything.
I don't want to die.
I'm begging you.
I don't...
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it.
I'm sorry, dear.
I'm sorry, Jason.
Please.
Please forgive me.
You've got to understand.
I... I didn't mean to do any of this.
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
Please.
Please forgive me.
I can hear you!
I can see you!
Come on, motherfucker!
Come on!
I'm too out there to be in here all the time Does it mean that I don't
want to stay?
Anybody can get talked with back down Does it mean that I don't
feel the same?
It's so hard, it's so hard to stay alive
We got
something! Where is it?
Over here.
Over here, look.
Where is it?
Here. You got the K2 on there? Yep. It's actually flashing.
Get the camera over here. It's actually on red.
Where is it? It's on red, look.
Which direction? Over here?
What's that?
What the hell is that?
Over there. Have a look, come on. Have a look. I'm just happy to see something
moving.
What's that?
Where? That's the oak over there, behind that tree.
Oh, that tree?
Just what I want.
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