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1
00:01:14,742 --> 00:01:17,408
AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
2
00:01:23,784 --> 00:01:25,216
7.
3
00:01:26,987 --> 00:01:30,355
HELLO KIDDIES WHAT'S IN YOU?
4
00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:36,161
I WAS JUST IN THE MIDDLE
OF MY DEADLY DOZEN.
5
00:01:36,229 --> 00:01:38,730
FIRST I DO A FEW PULL UPS.
6
00:01:38,799 --> 00:01:40,965
THEN A FEW JUMPING HACKS.
7
00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:45,404
THEN I LIKE TO FINISH WITH A
LITTLE DIE IMPACT AEROBICS.
8
00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:51,677
8.
9
00:01:51,745 --> 00:01:53,590
I'M GETTING IN SHAPE
FOR TONIGHT'S TALE.
10
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:56,181
IT'S ABOUT AN AMBITIOUS
YOUNG ACTRESS
11
00:01:56,249 --> 00:01:58,617
WHO'S LOOKING FOR HER BIG BREAK.
12
00:01:58,686 --> 00:02:00,285
WILL SHE MAKE IT?
13
00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:02,954
ONLY HER SCAREDRESSER
KNOWS FOR SURE.
14
00:02:03,023 --> 00:02:04,889
HA HA HA! OHH...
15
00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:07,793
I CALL THIS DISMAL DRAMA...
16
00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:10,629
BEAUTY REST.
17
00:02:20,374 --> 00:02:24,142
WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE
PART OF A WOMAN?
18
00:02:24,211 --> 00:02:26,144
THE NAPE OF HER NECK?
19
00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:35,520
THE LINE OF HER BACK?
20
00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:38,190
OR THE SHAPE OF HER BREASTS?
21
00:02:38,258 --> 00:02:40,592
OR JUST MAYBE IT'S HER MIND.
22
00:02:42,296 --> 00:02:44,729
IT MAY BE A MAN'S WORLD,
23
00:02:44,798 --> 00:02:49,167
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I
HAVE TO TAKE IT LYING DOWN,
24
00:02:49,236 --> 00:02:51,736
BECAUSE I WANT TO COMPETE...
25
00:02:51,805 --> 00:02:53,605
WHETHER I'M A CEO
26
00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:56,541
OR AN M.D. OR AN M.R.S.
27
00:02:56,610 --> 00:03:00,612
I WANT TO BE TAKEN
SERIOUSLY... VERY SERIOUSLY.
28
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,615
THAT'S WHY I NEVER
FEEL FULLY DRESSED
29
00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:07,553
UNTIL I PUT ON BALL BUSTER.
30
00:03:07,621 --> 00:03:10,288
IT'S NOT FOR JUST ANY WOMAN.
31
00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:13,191
IT'S FOR THE WOMAN
WHO MEANS BUSINESS.
32
00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:26,204
CUT!
33
00:03:26,273 --> 00:03:28,207
DID YOU GET IT? GOOD.
34
00:03:28,275 --> 00:03:30,208
GENTLEMEN, HELEN CURTIS.
35
00:03:30,276 --> 00:03:32,210
HELEN, YOU WERE FABULOUS!
36
00:03:32,279 --> 00:03:33,211
FABULOUS!
37
00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:34,212
REALLY?
38
00:03:34,281 --> 00:03:35,281
YES.
39
00:03:36,783 --> 00:03:38,016
AH, YES.
40
00:03:40,787 --> 00:03:42,787
SHE'S OUT OF TOWN.
41
00:03:42,856 --> 00:03:45,723
EMILIO. I'M SORRY. DID
YOU REALLY MEAN THAT?
42
00:03:45,792 --> 00:03:49,161
HELEN, I HAVE BEEN DIRECTING
COMMERCIALS FOR 20 YEARS,
43
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:51,729
AND I'VE NEVER HAD AN ACTRESS
44
00:03:51,798 --> 00:03:53,731
TAKE DIRECTION LIKE YOU.
45
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:55,067
NEVER!
46
00:03:55,135 --> 00:03:58,070
IN A SCREEN TEST,
NO LESS! RIGHT?
47
00:03:58,138 --> 00:04:01,005
I ASKED YOU TO SHOW ME PRICK.
48
00:04:01,075 --> 00:04:04,042
YOU GAVE ME THE
WHOLE GODDAMN WALL!
49
00:04:04,111 --> 00:04:05,777
YOU ARE BRILLIANT!
50
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:09,681
EXCUSE ME, EMILIO.
51
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:14,319
DOES THAT MEAN I GOT THE PART?
52
00:04:14,387 --> 00:04:16,688
AS I'M CONCERNED, YOU'RE IT.
53
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:19,124
YOU ARE THE BALL BUSTER GIRL.
54
00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:21,026
YOU IT. DONE DEAL.
55
00:04:22,496 --> 00:04:25,930
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
I DIDN'T GET THE JOB?
56
00:04:25,999 --> 00:04:29,200
RHONDA, YOU TELL HIM
I'D RATHER EAT DRANO
57
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:32,704
AND JUMP INTO A
BOWL OF PUS, O.K.?
58
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,205
YEAH.
59
00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:37,442
THEY WENT ANOTHER WAY.
60
00:04:37,510 --> 00:04:40,478
BUT THE DIRECTOR
SAID I HAD THE PART.
61
00:04:40,547 --> 00:04:42,480
IT WAS A DONE DEAL.
62
00:04:42,549 --> 00:04:45,049
WELL, THEY UNDID IT.
YOU GOT REAL CLOSE.
63
00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:47,552
I THOUGHT YOU GAVE UP SMOKING.
64
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:48,621
I DID.
65
00:04:50,023 --> 00:04:53,558
ARCHIE, I'M TIRED OF
BEING THE BRIDESMAID.
66
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:56,794
I WAS PERFECT FOR THAT PART.
67
00:04:56,863 --> 00:04:58,096
I AM THAT WOMAN.
68
00:04:58,164 --> 00:04:59,097
I KNOW.
69
00:04:59,166 --> 00:05:00,865
YOU ARE THE BALL BUSTER.
70
00:05:00,934 --> 00:05:03,401
IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
71
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:06,338
I'VE BEEN BASHING MY HEAD
AGAINST A WALL FOR 10 YEARS.
72
00:05:06,406 --> 00:05:09,941
AREN'T I ENTITLED TO A BREAK?
73
00:05:10,010 --> 00:05:11,776
I KNOW, I KNOW.
74
00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:20,986
SO WHO DID GET THE PART?
75
00:05:22,189 --> 00:05:23,232
IS IT REALLY IMPORTANT?
76
00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:26,124
WHAT DOES IT MATTER WHO GOT IT?
77
00:05:28,095 --> 00:05:29,261
BECAUSE I WANT TO KNOW.
78
00:05:31,698 --> 00:05:34,866
HONEY, YOU KNOW WHAT I SAY?
79
00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:37,502
I SAY LOOK TO THE FUTURE.
80
00:05:37,571 --> 00:05:41,139
ARCHIE, WHO GOT
THE PART? TELL ME.
81
00:05:41,208 --> 00:05:43,674
WHO KNOWS WHY THESE THINGS
GET CAST THE WAY THEY DO.
82
00:05:43,744 --> 00:05:46,311
I'VE BEEN IN THIS
BUSINESS 25 YEARS.
83
00:05:46,379 --> 00:05:48,146
I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT, HUH.
84
00:05:48,214 --> 00:05:51,516
HA HA HA HA HA.
85
00:05:51,584 --> 00:05:55,353
YOUR ROOMMATE JOYCE
GOT THE PART, O.K.?
86
00:05:55,422 --> 00:05:57,967
NOW, DON'T GO BLOWING THIS
THING OUT OF PROPORTION.
87
00:05:57,991 --> 00:06:00,903
WHAT CAN I SAY? SHE
IMPRESSED THE DIRECTOR.
88
00:06:00,927 --> 00:06:03,728
WHAT HAPPENED DID HER ORGASM
SHOW SOME ACTING ABILITY?
89
00:06:05,665 --> 00:06:07,365
YOU KNOW HOW SHE
GOT THIS PART, DON'T YOU?
90
00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:10,302
SHE SCREWED THE GUY.
91
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:11,769
THAT'S NOT FAIR.
92
00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:14,305
RIGHT. SHE'S NOT SLEEPING
HER WAY TO THE TOP.
93
00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:15,940
AT THAT RATE, WHO SLEEPS?
94
00:06:16,009 --> 00:06:18,577
NO, NO, NO, RHONDA!
95
00:06:18,645 --> 00:06:21,558
TELL HIM I'LL TURN THE
DEAL INTO DOG FOOD!
96
00:06:21,582 --> 00:06:23,281
YOU GOT IT? GOOD!
97
00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:25,917
YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR PROBLEM IS?
98
00:06:25,986 --> 00:06:27,964
YOU'VE GOT A ROTTEN ATTITUDE.
99
00:06:27,988 --> 00:06:30,021
BECAUSE I WON'T PUT OUT?
100
00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:32,858
BECAUSE I THINK IT'S
WHAT'S INSIDE THAT COUNTS?
101
00:06:32,926 --> 00:06:36,405
HAVE YOU THOUGHT MAYBE YOUR
ROOMMATE GETS THESE PARTS
102
00:06:36,429 --> 00:06:38,407
BECAUSE SHE WANTS THEM MORE?
103
00:06:38,431 --> 00:06:40,098
I WANT THESE PARTS,
104
00:06:40,167 --> 00:06:43,034
BUT THERE ARE SOME
THINGS I WON'T DO!
105
00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:45,103
FINE! WHAT WILL YOU DO?
106
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:48,039
I SHOWED YOU WHAT
I'M WILLING TO DO.
107
00:06:48,108 --> 00:06:49,874
I FIRED YOUR ASS.
108
00:06:49,943 --> 00:06:51,376
OH!
109
00:06:51,445 --> 00:06:53,378
HELEN, IS THAT YOU?
110
00:06:53,447 --> 00:06:56,448
OH, MY GOD. I HAVE
THE BEST NEWS.
111
00:06:56,516 --> 00:06:58,383
YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO GUESS
112
00:06:58,452 --> 00:07:00,385
WHAT HAPPENED TO ME TODAY.
113
00:07:00,454 --> 00:07:03,888
EAT NAIL POLISH AND
DIE, YOU LITTLE BITCH!
114
00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:07,692
GOSH. WHY ARE YOU
IN SUCH A BAD MOOD?
115
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,595
BECAUSE YOU'RE IN
SUCH A GOOD MOOD.
116
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:21,172
WHAT DO YOU GOT AGAINST
ME HAVING A CAREER?
117
00:07:23,277 --> 00:07:26,311
WHY DO THE HELL
DO I EAT THIS SHIT.
118
00:07:28,248 --> 00:07:30,448
MIGHT AS WELL BE
FAT AND MISERABLE.
119
00:07:30,517 --> 00:07:32,517
HELEN, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
120
00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:37,088
WHY IS IT THAT EVERY TIME
121
00:07:37,157 --> 00:07:39,257
SOMEONE GETS
CLOSE TO CASTING ME...
122
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:43,195
YOU SUDDENLY SHOW UP
WITH YOUR LEGS SPREAD?
123
00:07:43,263 --> 00:07:46,097
I HAVE NEVER DONE THAT.
124
00:07:46,166 --> 00:07:47,999
AND THAT'S MY ICE CREAM.
125
00:07:49,736 --> 00:07:50,736
SO?
126
00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:57,075
SO, THAT'S OKAY.
127
00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:58,977
I DIDN'T LIKE THAT
FLAVOR ANYWAY.
128
00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:02,947
EEWW!
129
00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:05,216
I WANT YOU OUT
OF THIS APARTMENT.
130
00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:07,284
BUT IT'S MY APARTMENT.
131
00:08:10,790 --> 00:08:12,724
GO TO HELL.
132
00:08:12,792 --> 00:08:14,792
HELEN, WOULD YOU CALM DOWN?
133
00:08:14,861 --> 00:08:17,595
LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS.
134
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:20,232
I THOUGHT THAT WE WERE FRIENDS.
135
00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:22,178
DON'T EVER SAY "FRIENDS"
IN RELATIONSHIP TO US.
136
00:08:22,202 --> 00:08:23,202
YOU GOT ME?
137
00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:25,904
NO FRIEND WOULD EVER
DO TO ME WHAT YOU DID.
138
00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:28,573
BUT I HAVEN'T DONE
ANYTHING. I SWEAR IT.
139
00:08:28,642 --> 00:08:30,441
REALLY?
140
00:08:30,511 --> 00:08:32,944
OH, GOOD. DOUGHNUTS.
141
00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:36,948
WHAT ABOUT RUBINA'S CAR MART?
142
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:39,818
WHAT ABOUT BON VOYAGE CRUISES?
143
00:08:39,887 --> 00:08:42,954
WHAT ABOUT BALL BUSTER?
144
00:08:43,023 --> 00:08:45,463
IT'S LIKE COMPETING
WITH A SPERM BANK.
145
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:46,457
BALL BUSTER?
146
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:50,227
YOU MEAN I GOT BALL BUSTER?
147
00:08:50,297 --> 00:08:52,363
HA HA HA. YES!
148
00:08:52,432 --> 00:08:54,299
YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW?
149
00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:58,803
THEN WHAT THE HELL
150
00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:01,405
ARE YOU SO DAMNED HAPPY ABOUT?
151
00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:04,542
YOU KNOW THIS GUY
I'VE BEEN SEEING... TOM?
152
00:09:04,610 --> 00:09:07,445
WELL, HE'S IN CHARGE
OF THIS BEAUTY PAGEANT
153
00:09:07,513 --> 00:09:09,781
FOR SOME TRADE
SHOW OR SOMETHING,
154
00:09:09,849 --> 00:09:13,318
AND, WELL, HE'S GOING
TO MAKE ME THE WINNER.
155
00:09:13,387 --> 00:09:16,354
SEE, HE GAVE ME
THIS NOTE, AND...
156
00:09:16,422 --> 00:09:18,323
UHH...
157
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:20,825
YOU MAKE ME SICK.
158
00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:23,828
YOU MAKE ME SO SICK.
159
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,563
IT'S NOT WHAT YOU'RE THINKING.
160
00:09:25,632 --> 00:09:27,465
I REALLY LIKE THIS GUY.
161
00:09:27,534 --> 00:09:29,378
THAT'S WHAT THE NOTE SAYS?
162
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:33,571
NO. THE NOTE'S FOR THE GUY
EMCEEING THE PAGEANT... GEORGE.
163
00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:35,607
DON'T TALK TO ME.
164
00:09:35,675 --> 00:09:37,709
JOYCE, DON'T TALK TO ME.
165
00:09:37,777 --> 00:09:40,111
JUST DON'T TALK TO ME!
166
00:10:24,024 --> 00:10:25,024
HI.
167
00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:31,396
JOYCE.
168
00:10:35,368 --> 00:10:37,235
I BROUGHT A LITTLE
PEACE OFFERING.
169
00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:40,204
REALLY.
170
00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:42,140
THAT'S SO SWEET OF YOU.
171
00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:45,977
I'M SORRY.
172
00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:49,480
I... I GUESS I JUST
GOT FRUSTRATED.
173
00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:52,283
YOU KNOW I BEEN PLUGGING
AWAY AT IT FOR SO LONG...
174
00:10:52,351 --> 00:10:55,553
I GOT SO LITTLE TO SHOW FOR IT.
175
00:10:55,622 --> 00:10:59,857
AND YOU JUST WALTZ IN HERE
WITH NOT ONE JOB BUT TWO.
176
00:11:18,412 --> 00:11:19,544
HEY...
177
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,179
IT'S O.K.
178
00:11:27,587 --> 00:11:29,854
I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL.
179
00:11:29,923 --> 00:11:31,589
THANKS.
180
00:11:31,658 --> 00:11:34,325
WOULD YOU MIND
GETTING MY NECKLACE?
181
00:11:34,394 --> 00:11:35,394
OH, SURE.
182
00:11:38,431 --> 00:11:41,366
BOY, THIS IS, UH... THIS
IS REALLY BEAUTIFUL.
183
00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:42,734
THANK YOU.
184
00:11:42,802 --> 00:11:45,870
THE TRUTH IS, I REALLY
ADMIRE YOUR ABILITY
185
00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:47,771
TO GET WHAT YOU WANT.
186
00:11:47,841 --> 00:11:51,375
DO YOU GET ANY MONEY
FOR WINNING THIS CONTEST?
187
00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:53,377
UH...
188
00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:55,379
I THINK, UM...
189
00:11:55,448 --> 00:11:58,215
I THINK THE WINNER GETS, UM...
190
00:12:03,957 --> 00:12:06,123
THEY GET TO BE, LIKE,
191
00:12:06,192 --> 00:12:08,237
THE SPOKESPERSON
FOR THE COMPANY.
192
00:12:08,261 --> 00:12:10,506
SOMETHING LIKE THAT, YOU KNOW?
193
00:12:10,530 --> 00:12:12,496
OH, REALLY? THAT'S INTERESTING.
194
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:14,398
UM, WHAT'S IT FOR?
195
00:12:17,971 --> 00:12:21,372
YOU KNOW, I THINK
I FORGOT TO ASK.
196
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,708
HA HA HA. YOU.
197
00:12:23,777 --> 00:12:26,744
ISN'T THAT SILLY OF ME?
198
00:12:26,813 --> 00:12:29,880
HA HA HA HA HA!
199
00:12:35,489 --> 00:12:37,655
OOH. HA HA HA!
200
00:12:53,573 --> 00:12:56,974
YEAH. I'LL MAKE SURE
SHE GETS IT, GEORGE.
201
00:12:57,043 --> 00:12:58,876
SWEET DREAMS, YOU LITTLE TRAMP.
202
00:12:58,945 --> 00:13:01,446
BY THE TIME YOU WAKE UP,
203
00:13:01,514 --> 00:13:04,114
YOUR SPOKESMODELING
JOB WILL BE MINE.
204
00:13:04,183 --> 00:13:07,185
NOW, I WANT YOU TO TAKE IT EASY.
205
00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:09,754
BY THE TIME I GET... BACK...
206
00:13:12,626 --> 00:13:13,958
JOYCE?
207
00:13:21,534 --> 00:13:22,967
JOYCE?
208
00:13:34,047 --> 00:13:35,479
GOD.
209
00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:36,981
OH, GOD.
210
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,490
DON'T BE DEAD.
211
00:13:48,127 --> 00:13:50,328
PLEASE DON'T BE DEAD.
212
00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:52,998
THIS...
213
00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:57,501
THIS IS NOT MY FAULT!
214
00:14:01,641 --> 00:14:04,575
I'M NOT GOING TO JAIL FOR YOU.
215
00:14:04,644 --> 00:14:06,577
YOU DON'T DESERVE IT.
216
00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:08,512
I'D RATHER KILL MYSELF.
217
00:14:16,122 --> 00:14:18,100
"THE DIRECTION MY
LIFE HAS BEEN GOING IN
218
00:14:18,124 --> 00:14:20,758
"HAS BEEN DOWNHILL
FOR SO LONG...
219
00:14:20,827 --> 00:14:22,292
"I CAN'T TAKE IT,
220
00:14:22,361 --> 00:14:25,396
AND SO I'M TOO DEPRESSED
TO GO ON LIVING ANYMORE."
221
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:27,031
THE END.
222
00:14:30,303 --> 00:14:32,269
WHY WOULDN'T YOU BE DEPRESSED?
223
00:14:32,338 --> 00:14:34,672
YOU TALKED ALL THE TIME
ABOUT KILLING YOURSELF.
224
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,353
THAT'S WHAT I'LL
TELL THE POLICE.
225
00:14:38,377 --> 00:14:41,812
WHEN THEY HEAR WHAT A
SLEAZY REPUTATION YOU HAD.
226
00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:44,215
THEY'LL PROBABLY WONDER WHY
YOU DIDN'T OFF YOURSELF SOONER.
227
00:15:05,872 --> 00:15:08,139
HI, I'M LOOKING FOR GEORGE.
228
00:15:10,844 --> 00:15:12,743
GREAT, THANKS.
229
00:15:12,812 --> 00:15:14,278
I HAVE AN HOUR?
230
00:15:16,382 --> 00:15:18,215
THAT'S RIGHT, MISS PALMER.
231
00:15:18,284 --> 00:15:22,153
AT 7 THE PAGEANT BEGINS WITH
THE REVIEW OF THE CONTESTANTS.
232
00:15:22,221 --> 00:15:26,424
AND THEN WE DO BALL
GOWNS, THEN THE SWIMSUITS,
233
00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:29,427
THEN THE INTERVIEWS,
AND THEN THE JUDGING.
234
00:15:29,495 --> 00:15:31,429
WHO EXACTLY IS JUDGING THIS?
235
00:15:31,497 --> 00:15:33,931
A PANEL OF EXPERTS, OF COURSE.
236
00:15:33,999 --> 00:15:35,332
EXCUSE ME.
237
00:15:35,401 --> 00:15:36,434
I'M SORRY.
238
00:15:36,502 --> 00:15:37,935
ARE... ARE YOU GEORGE?
239
00:15:38,003 --> 00:15:39,981
THAT'S RIGHT. AND YOU ARE...
240
00:15:40,005 --> 00:15:43,774
ACTUALLY, IF I COULD TALK TO
YOU PRIVATELY FOR A MOMENT...
241
00:15:43,842 --> 00:15:45,042
OF COURSE.
242
00:15:46,011 --> 00:15:48,057
DID THAT ANSWER YOUR QUESTION?
243
00:15:48,081 --> 00:15:50,448
YES. THANK YOU,
GEORGE. YOU'RE SWEET.
244
00:15:54,421 --> 00:15:57,955
I THINK I SHOULD
SHOW YOU THIS FIRST.
245
00:16:05,865 --> 00:16:07,298
TOM GAVE YOU THIS?
246
00:16:07,366 --> 00:16:08,446
MM-HMM.
247
00:16:12,105 --> 00:16:15,306
WELL, IF THAT'S
WHAT TOM WANTS...
248
00:16:15,374 --> 00:16:16,974
REALLY?
249
00:16:17,043 --> 00:16:18,976
I CAN WORK WITH IT.
250
00:16:19,045 --> 00:16:19,977
O.K.
251
00:16:20,046 --> 00:16:20,978
OH, WHAT THE HELL.
252
00:16:21,047 --> 00:16:24,982
KNOWING WHO THE
WINNER IS GOING TO BE NOW
253
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:28,485
MEANS THAT THE CREW CAN SET UP
254
00:16:28,554 --> 00:16:31,488
FOR THE GRAND FINALE
THAT MUCH QUICKER.
255
00:16:34,060 --> 00:16:36,994
HAVE YOU KNOWN TOM A LONG TIME?
256
00:16:37,063 --> 00:16:39,997
NO. JUST... JUST THAT ONCE.
257
00:16:42,068 --> 00:16:44,501
HA HA HA! THAT TOM.
258
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:49,506
I LIKE A GIRL WITH
YOUR... QUALITIES.
259
00:16:49,575 --> 00:16:51,075
THANK YOU.
260
00:16:51,144 --> 00:16:53,510
LET'S PUT YOU IN
DRESSING ROOM 7.
261
00:16:53,579 --> 00:16:55,012
FIRST DOOR ON THE RIGHT.
262
00:16:55,081 --> 00:16:56,547
GEORGE, THANK YOU.
263
00:17:10,095 --> 00:17:13,096
HI. YOU MUST BE MY
NEXT-DOOR NEIGHBOR.
264
00:17:13,166 --> 00:17:15,132
I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING,
265
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:17,468
AND I THINK IT'S DISGUSTING.
266
00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:19,036
WHAT?
267
00:17:19,104 --> 00:17:23,140
NOT THAT THIS CONTEST
IS A BIG DEAL TO ME,
268
00:17:23,209 --> 00:17:25,576
BUT EVEN IF IT WAS, I
WOULDN'T STOOP TO YOUR LEVEL.
269
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:27,978
I WOULDN'T FUCK SOME
STRANGER JUST TO GET A BREAK.
270
00:17:29,915 --> 00:17:31,748
UP YOURS.
271
00:17:31,817 --> 00:17:34,652
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
272
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,921
I KNOW YOU SLEPT WITH TOM
SO YOU COULD WIN THIS THING.
273
00:17:38,424 --> 00:17:41,726
LOOK, IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK.
274
00:17:41,794 --> 00:17:45,229
I BET IT'S WORSE
THAN WHAT I THINK.
275
00:17:45,297 --> 00:17:46,864
PROBABLY UNSAFE SEX.
276
00:17:46,933 --> 00:17:50,011
WHO ARE YOU TO COME
IN HERE AND GIVE ME...
277
00:17:50,035 --> 00:17:51,469
OH, I'M SORRY.
278
00:17:51,537 --> 00:17:53,303
IT'S O.K.
279
00:17:53,372 --> 00:17:54,905
I'M JUST LEAVING.
280
00:17:57,477 --> 00:18:00,410
YOU KNOW, HONEY,
TWO CAN PLAY THIS GAME.
281
00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:07,385
YOU TWO GIRLS GOT A PROBLEM?
282
00:18:07,453 --> 00:18:09,854
NO. NO. WE'RE OLD FRIENDS.
283
00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:12,301
WE NEED TO SEE YOU
IN YOUR COSTUME,
284
00:18:12,325 --> 00:18:15,192
CHECK IT AGAINST THE
LIGHTS FOR THE GRAND FINALE.
285
00:18:15,261 --> 00:18:17,261
O.K.
286
00:18:17,330 --> 00:18:18,374
OH, GEORGE?
287
00:18:18,398 --> 00:18:20,530
I DON'T WANT TO SOUND STUPID,
288
00:18:20,599 --> 00:18:23,467
BUT WHEN I BECOME THE
COMPANY SPOKESMODEL,
289
00:18:23,535 --> 00:18:25,969
WHAT EXACTLY WILL I BE SELLING?
290
00:18:26,038 --> 00:18:30,274
WELL, MORE THAN ANYTHING
ELSE, YOU'LL BE SELLING YOURSELF,
291
00:18:30,343 --> 00:18:33,910
WHO YOU ARE... INSIDE.
292
00:18:35,147 --> 00:18:37,381
THAT'S REALLY POETIC.
293
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:38,515
THANKS.
294
00:18:39,752 --> 00:18:43,353
WAS YOU LAST DAY ON EARTH?
295
00:18:43,422 --> 00:18:45,522
I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A
NATURAL KIND OF A GIRL,
296
00:18:45,592 --> 00:18:47,269
SO I SUPPOSE I'D
GO TO THE COUNTRY.
297
00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:49,927
AND I'D LOOK AT THE
FLOWERS AND THE TREES,
298
00:18:49,996 --> 00:18:52,329
AND THE MOUNTAINS
AND THE FRESH AIR.
299
00:18:52,398 --> 00:18:55,833
OF COURSE I COULDN'T SEE
THE AIR BECAUSE IT'S INVISIBLE.
300
00:18:55,902 --> 00:18:59,637
BUT I'D BREATH AS
MUCH OF IT AS I COULD.
301
00:18:59,706 --> 00:19:00,716
AND THAT'S WHAT I'D DO
302
00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:03,040
IF TODAY WAS MY
LAST DAY ON EARTH.
303
00:19:03,109 --> 00:19:05,843
THANK YOU, SHEILA.
304
00:19:05,912 --> 00:19:09,080
LET'S HEAR IT FOR CONTESTANT
NUMBER EIGHT, SHEILA.
305
00:19:13,786 --> 00:19:15,086
THANK YOU, SHEILA.
306
00:19:16,388 --> 00:19:17,755
AND NOW LADIES AND GENTLEMAN
307
00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:20,257
FOR OUR LAST CONTESTANT
OF THE EVENING.
308
00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:23,293
WON'T YOU GIVE A WARM
ROUND OF APPLAUSE
309
00:19:23,362 --> 00:19:25,062
FOR HELEN.
310
00:19:35,408 --> 00:19:37,452
HOW ARE YOU TONIGHT, HELEN?
311
00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:39,677
I'M FINE. VERY HAPPY TO BE HERE.
312
00:19:39,746 --> 00:19:41,891
ARE YOU READY FOR YOUR QUESTION?
313
00:19:41,915 --> 00:19:43,280
YES, I AM.
314
00:19:43,349 --> 00:19:45,282
O.K.
315
00:19:45,351 --> 00:19:47,351
TELL US THEN, HELEN,
316
00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:50,354
"IN YOUR LIFE, WHAT
IS THE ONE THING
317
00:19:50,423 --> 00:19:53,357
"YOU FEEL MOST
GUILTY ABOUT DOING,
318
00:19:53,426 --> 00:19:56,026
AND WHY DID YOU DO IT?"
319
00:20:00,099 --> 00:20:02,033
THE, UH...
320
00:20:04,003 --> 00:20:06,470
WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'M GUILTY?
321
00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:09,439
WE'VE ALL DONE BAD
THINGS IN OUR LIVES,
322
00:20:09,508 --> 00:20:10,942
HAVEN'T WE, GEORGE?
323
00:20:12,445 --> 00:20:14,645
BUT I HAVE NO REGRETS,
324
00:20:14,713 --> 00:20:18,215
BECAUSE, NO MATTER WHAT,
I'VE BEEN TRUE TO MYSELF,
325
00:20:18,284 --> 00:20:22,386
AND AFTER ALL, IT'S
WHAT'S INSIDE THAT COUNTS.
326
00:20:22,455 --> 00:20:23,988
RIGHT?
327
00:20:24,057 --> 00:20:25,957
GOOD ANSWER, HELEN!
328
00:20:26,025 --> 00:20:27,959
LET'S HEAR IT FOR HELEN,
329
00:20:28,027 --> 00:20:29,393
AND LET'S HEAR IT
330
00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:31,829
FOR ALL OUR FINE
YOUNG CONTESTANTS.
331
00:20:39,839 --> 00:20:41,479
AND NOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
332
00:20:41,541 --> 00:20:43,907
THE JUDGES WILL
MAKE THEIR DECISION,
333
00:20:43,976 --> 00:20:45,843
AND IN A FEW MINUTES,
334
00:20:45,911 --> 00:20:48,746
THE WINNER OF OUR
PAGEANT WILL APPEAR
335
00:20:48,814 --> 00:20:50,414
IN THE GRAND FINALE.
336
00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:02,592
SHOULD I WEAR THE
HEADDRESS FOR THE FINALE?
337
00:21:02,662 --> 00:21:04,361
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
338
00:21:07,499 --> 00:21:09,700
GEORGE.
339
00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:13,209
WHAT THE HELL KIND
OF QUESTION WAS THAT?
340
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:15,105
WE HAVE TO TALK.
341
00:21:20,379 --> 00:21:23,747
THIS NOTE... IT DOESN'T EXIST.
342
00:21:25,318 --> 00:21:27,318
IT NEVER EXISTED.
343
00:21:27,386 --> 00:21:29,253
I'M SORRY.
344
00:21:29,322 --> 00:21:31,322
WAIT A MINUTE.
345
00:21:31,390 --> 00:21:33,890
DOES THIS MEAN I DON'T WIN?
346
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:37,328
IT'S THAT BITCH
DRUSILLA, ISN'T IT?
347
00:21:37,396 --> 00:21:39,763
IT'S OUT OF MY HANDS, HONEY.
348
00:21:41,900 --> 00:21:43,820
IT'S OUT OF YOUR
PANTS, YOU MEAN.
349
00:21:53,846 --> 00:21:55,846
HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE A WHORE?
350
00:21:55,914 --> 00:21:58,148
AND A HYPOCRITE.
351
00:21:58,217 --> 00:21:59,650
HYPOCRITE?
352
00:22:01,687 --> 00:22:03,020
I'M IMPRESSED.
353
00:22:03,088 --> 00:22:05,489
THAT'S A BIG WORD FOR
A LITTLE SLUT LIKE YOU.
354
00:22:05,558 --> 00:22:06,924
I'M A SLUT?
355
00:22:06,992 --> 00:22:09,960
THAT'S THE POT CALLING THE
KETTLE BLACK, DON'T YOU THINK?
356
00:22:10,029 --> 00:22:12,830
YOU FUCKED HIM TO WIN
THE CONTEST, DIDN'T YOU?
357
00:22:12,898 --> 00:22:17,067
YEP. YOU COULD SAY THAT.
358
00:22:17,136 --> 00:22:21,805
YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN GEORGE'S
EXPRESSION WHEN I SAID I'D SUE HIM.
359
00:22:23,075 --> 00:22:25,409
SUE HIM?
360
00:22:25,477 --> 00:22:26,977
FOR SEXUAL HARASSMENT.
361
00:22:27,046 --> 00:22:28,724
I TOLD HIM I'D CALL THE POLICE,
362
00:22:28,748 --> 00:22:30,581
CALL THE NEWSPAPERS.
363
00:22:30,650 --> 00:22:35,386
THIS BUSINESS OF SLEEPING
WITH SOMEONE TO WIN IS BULLSHIT.
364
00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:39,923
I BET GIRLS LIKE YOU
LOVE THE CASTING COUCH.
365
00:22:39,992 --> 00:22:44,361
DEGRADING SEX WITH
SOME SWEATY STRANGER
366
00:22:44,429 --> 00:22:46,797
IS PROBABLY EASIER
THAN MEMORIZING LINES.
367
00:22:46,865 --> 00:22:48,332
BUT I-I...
368
00:22:48,401 --> 00:22:49,333
SPARE ME.
369
00:22:49,402 --> 00:22:52,102
I KNOW ALL ABOUT THE NOTE.
370
00:22:52,171 --> 00:22:54,671
LOOK, THERE'S SOMETHING
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
371
00:22:54,740 --> 00:22:57,674
THAT NOTE... IT WASN'T MINE.
372
00:22:57,743 --> 00:23:00,811
I'M NOT THAT KIND OF GIRL.
373
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:04,181
OH, YEAH. SO WHAT
KIND OF GIRL ARE YOU?
374
00:23:09,188 --> 00:23:10,387
UHH!
375
00:23:15,260 --> 00:23:17,428
I'M THIS KIND OF GIRL.
376
00:23:26,138 --> 00:23:27,904
NICE LOOK, BABE.
377
00:23:27,973 --> 00:23:29,806
THAT SUITS YOU.
378
00:23:42,155 --> 00:23:44,588
HAVE YOU SEEN DRUSILLA?
379
00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:47,591
UH, DRUSILLA? NO. SHE LEFT.
380
00:23:47,660 --> 00:23:49,093
SHE LEFT?
381
00:23:49,162 --> 00:23:51,595
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, SHE LEFT?
382
00:23:51,664 --> 00:23:54,098
WELL, I WAS TALKING TO HER,
383
00:23:54,167 --> 00:23:56,145
AND, UH, SHE CHANGED HER MIND...
384
00:23:56,169 --> 00:23:59,069
YOU KNOW, ABOUT
THAT THREAT SHE MADE.
385
00:23:59,138 --> 00:24:02,606
SHE DECIDED IT WASN'T WORTH
GETTING CHOKED UP ABOUT,
386
00:24:02,675 --> 00:24:04,608
SO SHE LEFT.
387
00:24:04,677 --> 00:24:06,610
THAT WORKS FOR ME.
388
00:24:06,679 --> 00:24:09,613
YOU STILL INTERESTED
IN WINNING THIS THING?
389
00:24:09,682 --> 00:24:11,916
YOU BET I AM.
390
00:24:11,984 --> 00:24:14,218
I LIKE YOUR ATTITUDE.
391
00:24:36,041 --> 00:24:37,474
WORK FAST, RUDY.
392
00:24:37,543 --> 00:24:38,975
DON'T I ALWAYS?
393
00:24:39,044 --> 00:24:41,144
OPEN YOUR ROBE.
394
00:24:41,213 --> 00:24:42,346
OH!
395
00:25:00,766 --> 00:25:03,067
GREAT BONE STRUCTURE.
396
00:25:03,135 --> 00:25:04,201
THANKS.
397
00:25:09,875 --> 00:25:11,642
I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU.
398
00:25:11,710 --> 00:25:14,378
I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING
FOR THE NATURAL LOOK,
399
00:25:14,446 --> 00:25:16,947
OR DOESN'T MY
OPINION MEAN ANYTHING?
400
00:25:17,015 --> 00:25:20,117
OF COURSE YOUR OPINION
COUNTS. YOU'RE PART OF THE TEAM.
401
00:25:20,185 --> 00:25:22,920
WAIT. THIS IS TOO HEAVY.
IT WON'T LOOK RIGHT.
402
00:25:22,988 --> 00:25:24,888
GET YOUR HAND AWAY.
403
00:25:24,957 --> 00:25:29,159
I'M REALLY FINE WITH
DOING MY OWN MAKE-UP.
404
00:25:29,228 --> 00:25:31,595
THIS IS THE LAST
YEAR I'M DOING THIS.
405
00:25:31,664 --> 00:25:34,331
THIS WHOLE BEAUTY PAGEANT
THING MAKES ME THROW UP.
406
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:36,934
WE SHOULD JUST TAKE THEM
OFF THE STREETS LIKE BEFORE.
407
00:25:37,002 --> 00:25:39,402
RUDY, RUDY, RUDY.
408
00:25:43,308 --> 00:25:46,776
GEORGE, WOULD YOU MAKE HIM STOP.
409
00:25:46,845 --> 00:25:50,480
HOW CAN I MODEL
ANYTHING LOOKING LIKE THIS?
410
00:25:50,550 --> 00:25:52,527
I WOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT THAT.
411
00:25:52,551 --> 00:25:54,752
OH, GOD. NO!
412
00:25:54,820 --> 00:25:56,886
NO!
413
00:25:56,955 --> 00:25:58,388
NO! NO!
414
00:25:58,457 --> 00:26:01,926
YOU'RE GOING TO LOOK JUST FINE.
415
00:26:01,994 --> 00:26:03,127
OH!
416
00:26:03,195 --> 00:26:10,134
AAAAAHHHH!
417
00:26:25,917 --> 00:26:28,151
THERE'S SOMETHING ALMOST MAGICAL
418
00:26:28,220 --> 00:26:30,286
ABOUT A PRETTY GIRL.
419
00:26:30,356 --> 00:26:33,557
HER SMILE CAN MELT
THE HARDEST HEART.
420
00:26:33,625 --> 00:26:36,260
AND SET THE THING AWHIRL.
421
00:26:36,329 --> 00:26:38,996
BUT PRETTY EYES AND LOVELY HAIR.
422
00:26:39,065 --> 00:26:41,865
ARE THINGS THAT WILL NOT KEEP.
423
00:26:41,934 --> 00:26:45,002
SO I AGREE WITH THOSE WHO SAY
424
00:26:45,071 --> 00:26:48,705
THAT BEAUTY IS JUST SKIN DEEP.
425
00:26:51,177 --> 00:26:53,010
♪ HERE SHE IS ♪
426
00:26:53,079 --> 00:26:56,013
♪ A PICTURE OF GRACE ♪
427
00:26:56,082 --> 00:26:58,949
♪ TWO VACANT BLUE EYES ♪
428
00:26:59,018 --> 00:27:01,385
♪ IN AN ASHEN WHITE FACE ♪
429
00:27:01,454 --> 00:27:04,955
♪ THOUGH SHE
SEEMS KIND OF STIFF ♪
430
00:27:05,024 --> 00:27:07,458
♪ AS AN EX-HUMAN-BEIN' ♪
431
00:27:07,526 --> 00:27:10,694
♪ HOW FAR SHE WILL GO ♪
432
00:27:10,762 --> 00:27:14,398
♪ REMAINS TO BE SEEN ♪
433
00:27:20,472 --> 00:27:22,272
♪ SHE'S CHARMING ♪
434
00:27:22,341 --> 00:27:24,441
THOSE COLORS!
435
00:27:24,510 --> 00:27:26,977
♪ SHE COULDN'T BE NICER ♪
436
00:27:27,046 --> 00:27:29,312
♪ WHAT A PLEASURE ♪
437
00:27:29,381 --> 00:27:31,447
♪ IT WAS TO SLICE HER ♪
438
00:27:31,516 --> 00:27:36,153
♪ SHE'S MAGNIFICENT,
EVERY OUNCE ♪
439
00:27:36,221 --> 00:27:40,223
♪ 'CAUSE IT'S WHAT'S
INSIDE THAT COUNTS ♪
440
00:27:43,128 --> 00:27:47,097
♪ HOW EXCITING IT IS TO SUTURE ♪
441
00:27:47,166 --> 00:27:52,002
♪ A BEAUTY WITHOUT ANY FUTURE ♪
442
00:27:52,071 --> 00:27:57,241
♪ SHE'S MAGNIFICENT,
EVERY OUNCE ♪
443
00:27:57,309 --> 00:28:01,578
♪ 'CAUSE IT'S WHAT'S INSIDE ♪
444
00:28:01,647 --> 00:28:03,413
♪ THAT ♪
445
00:28:03,482 --> 00:28:08,185
♪ COUNTS ♪♪
446
00:28:08,253 --> 00:28:11,221
WHOO! YAY! YAY!
447
00:28:30,876 --> 00:28:32,308
GOOD OLD HELEN.
448
00:28:32,377 --> 00:28:33,977
TALK ABOUT AN OPENING NIGHT!
449
00:28:34,046 --> 00:28:36,914
NOW, THAT'S WHAT I
CALL A HORRID BODY.
450
00:28:36,982 --> 00:28:40,551
WELL, I GOT TO GET BACK
TO MY WORKOUT, KIDDIES.
451
00:28:44,623 --> 00:28:46,056
UHH...
452
00:28:46,124 --> 00:28:49,059
OOH, I LOVE THAT BURN.
453
00:28:49,127 --> 00:28:51,194
AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
454
00:28:51,263 --> 00:28:54,330
CAPTIONING MADE
POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.
455
00:28:54,399 --> 00:28:57,311
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE... www.ncicap.org...
456
00:28:57,335 --> 00:28:59,271
PUBLIC PERFORMANCE OF
CAPTIONS PROHIBITED WITHOUT
457
00:28:59,295 --> 00:29:01,015
PERMISSION OF NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
30865
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