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1
00:00:01,335 --> 00:00:04,004
You can see that the sperm
has penetrated the ovum.
2
00:00:04,004 --> 00:00:06,774
Well, he had
his marching orders.
3
00:00:09,177 --> 00:00:11,179
We did it, Jeff.
We made a zygote.
4
00:00:11,179 --> 00:00:13,247
I create life.
5
00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:17,318
Like a god.
6
00:00:17,318 --> 00:00:20,521
Well, it was a team effort.
You're right.
7
00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:22,022
Good job, doc.
8
00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:23,557
Thank you.
9
00:00:24,592 --> 00:00:26,394
Brenda, come look.
Okay.
10
00:00:26,394 --> 00:00:29,397
Excuse me. I'm who they're
putting it in, so...
11
00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:36,637
Aw. Jeff,
it looks just like you.
12
00:00:36,637 --> 00:00:41,642
You know, blob of cells that
hasn't developed a brain yet.
13
00:00:41,642 --> 00:00:46,280
World full of surrogates and,
uh, we get lesbian Don Rickles.
14
00:00:46,280 --> 00:00:48,916
Okay, so when are
we gonna knock me up?
15
00:00:48,916 --> 00:00:50,418
Day after tomorrow.
16
00:00:50,418 --> 00:00:52,486
So the zygote
has time to develop?
17
00:00:52,486 --> 00:00:55,189
Well, that, and
I'm playing golf tomorrow.
18
00:00:56,657 --> 00:01:00,428
Doc, any way that we could,
uh, help this to be a boy?
19
00:01:00,428 --> 00:01:01,595
Jeff.
20
00:01:03,197 --> 00:01:04,832
Girl. Nudge it
towards girl.
21
00:01:04,832 --> 00:01:09,103
Or we could split the difference
and get one of these.
22
00:01:13,073 --> 00:01:16,644
You're probably wondering
why I'm helping these people.
23
00:01:16,644 --> 00:01:19,313
Come on, babe. You know
you'd love a daughter.
24
00:01:19,313 --> 00:01:20,881
Who doesn't love
little girls?
25
00:01:20,881 --> 00:01:24,652
Whoa. Check out the blouse
mounds on that skank.
26
00:01:28,456 --> 00:01:30,758
Sir, we agreed
if I was going to join you
27
00:01:30,758 --> 00:01:33,294
in the pursuit
of female companionship
28
00:01:33,294 --> 00:01:35,729
we would do it with
a certain amount of decorum--
29
00:01:35,729 --> 00:01:37,831
Yowza, that'll play.
30
00:01:39,167 --> 00:01:41,135
And perfect,
there's two of them.
31
00:01:42,336 --> 00:01:44,972
Now, let me handle
the introductions.
32
00:01:44,972 --> 00:01:48,409
I think the approach requires
a more elegant and understated--
33
00:01:48,409 --> 00:01:50,678
My God,
they're tall as trees.
34
00:01:50,678 --> 00:01:53,046
Ha-ha-ha. Yes.
35
00:01:53,046 --> 00:01:56,550
Pardon my friend's, uh,
understated elegance.
36
00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:59,620
Uh, this is Timmy.
My name is Russell.
37
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:01,121
I'm Shante.
38
00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:02,356
And I'm Stasha.
39
00:02:02,356 --> 00:02:04,525
Pleased to be meeting you.
40
00:02:05,659 --> 00:02:07,428
Could we buy
you ladies a libation?
41
00:02:07,428 --> 00:02:09,062
RUSSELL:
That's a great idea.
42
00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:11,365
Why don't you get a White
Russian and a Black Velvet.
43
00:02:11,365 --> 00:02:13,667
Oh, that was fast.
44
00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,369
[SEÑOR HAPPY'S "HOW MANY WAYS"
PLAYING]
45
00:02:15,369 --> 00:02:18,772
* How many ways
To say, "I love you?" *
46
00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:25,313
* How many ways
To say that I'm not scared? *
47
00:02:25,313 --> 00:02:28,015
* With you by my side *
48
00:02:28,015 --> 00:02:30,684
* There is no denyin' *
49
00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:33,454
* I can't wait
For me and you *
50
00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:41,462
[***]
51
00:02:41,462 --> 00:02:43,364
So the doctor's
appointment went well.
52
00:02:43,364 --> 00:02:46,900
Yeah, check out our zygote.
Hmm.
53
00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:49,203
What's a zygote?
54
00:02:49,203 --> 00:02:50,738
Her fertilized egg.
55
00:02:53,907 --> 00:02:55,809
You done with this here?
56
00:02:55,809 --> 00:02:58,279
Yeah, yeah.
57
00:02:58,279 --> 00:02:59,747
Oh, man.
58
00:02:59,747 --> 00:03:01,815
You know how they make bacon?
Just take it.
59
00:03:05,253 --> 00:03:08,155
I'm his best friend.
60
00:03:08,155 --> 00:03:10,691
Hey, don't forget we have
that surrogacy seminar tonight.
61
00:03:10,691 --> 00:03:12,393
Well, this is a bad night
for me.
62
00:03:12,393 --> 00:03:14,662
Why, what else
do you have to do?
63
00:03:14,662 --> 00:03:16,730
No, going to
a surrogacy seminar.
64
00:03:17,998 --> 00:03:20,501
That's a bad night for me.
65
00:03:20,501 --> 00:03:22,202
Come on,
this is important to me.
66
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:24,772
They're gonna show us how we can
be more involved in the process.
67
00:03:24,772 --> 00:03:27,107
Well, I thought the whole
benefit of using Brenda
68
00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:29,009
was that
we could be less involved.
69
00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:31,479
You thought wrong.
70
00:03:31,479 --> 00:03:33,447
Come on, you're going.
I already paid for it.
71
00:03:33,447 --> 00:03:36,650
Well, can we, uh--?
Non-refundable.
72
00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:38,952
Not if you wrote a--
Paid cash.
73
00:03:38,952 --> 00:03:41,422
Fine, I'll go, but--
Not bringing your flask.
74
00:03:43,123 --> 00:03:46,860
You can't control the Scotch
that'll already be in my body.
75
00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:48,996
Yee.
76
00:03:48,996 --> 00:03:51,131
Hello.
77
00:03:51,131 --> 00:03:52,466
Heh. You both look chipper.
78
00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:55,603
I do have a certain spring
in me pants.
79
00:03:56,970 --> 00:04:00,441
What you're seeing is
two dudes who deftly managed
80
00:04:00,441 --> 00:04:02,142
to pick up a couple
of honeys last night.
81
00:04:02,142 --> 00:04:03,611
JEFF:
So let me guess, uh,
82
00:04:03,611 --> 00:04:06,714
you drove the van, and you
hit them with the blow dart.
83
00:04:06,714 --> 00:04:09,950
Ha-ha-ha.
So who are these girls?
84
00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:11,585
Did the one who
ended up with Russell
85
00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:14,288
get to pick first
next time?
86
00:04:14,288 --> 00:04:16,590
Oh, uh, heh.
87
00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:18,692
They're celebrities, actually.
88
00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:20,394
Actually.
89
00:04:20,394 --> 00:04:23,364
Stasha Ebonavich.
90
00:04:23,364 --> 00:04:26,600
Shante Jackson.
91
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:32,072
They're lady pro basketball
players for the New York Empire.
92
00:04:32,072 --> 00:04:35,175
Oh, so by celebrities, you meant
regular un-famous people
93
00:04:35,175 --> 00:04:37,445
who I could beat in basketball.
94
00:04:38,912 --> 00:04:40,314
So are they really tall?
95
00:04:40,314 --> 00:04:43,216
Big, like mountains.
96
00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:45,152
With mountains.
97
00:04:45,152 --> 00:04:46,987
Picture a mountain.
98
00:04:46,987 --> 00:04:48,556
And then two smaller,
99
00:04:48,556 --> 00:04:51,592
yet delightful little mountains
stuck on the front.
100
00:04:51,592 --> 00:04:54,762
Hopefully tonight,
I'll be scaling those peaks.
101
00:04:56,497 --> 00:04:59,032
The question was,
"Are they tall?"
102
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:02,703
[***]
103
00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:07,908
Ugh.
104
00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:10,811
Noodles suck.
105
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:14,515
I don't know what the Chinese
are so fired up about.
106
00:05:14,515 --> 00:05:16,984
Ugh, I'm so hungry.
107
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:19,753
Well, when we decided
to save for our honeymoon
108
00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:23,290
we had to cut either fancy
dinners or hair care products.
109
00:05:23,290 --> 00:05:25,959
You made the choice.
110
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:27,895
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
111
00:05:31,732 --> 00:05:34,835
I have a shipment of Omaha
steaks for Jeff Bingham.
112
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:36,537
Steaks?
113
00:05:36,537 --> 00:05:37,871
Oh, those are actually--
114
00:05:37,871 --> 00:05:39,807
[MIMICS JEFF'S VOICE]
Quiet, woman.
115
00:05:46,313 --> 00:05:48,081
I'm Jeff Bingham.
116
00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:50,851
What are you doing?
117
00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:54,822
You stay out of this, wife--
Audrey.
118
00:05:57,024 --> 00:05:58,592
She gets awfully mouthy.
119
00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:00,761
We just made a zygote.
120
00:06:02,129 --> 00:06:05,833
He's not Immigration.
He just needs a signature.
121
00:06:07,334 --> 00:06:08,536
There you go.
122
00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:10,838
Adam Rhodes?
123
00:06:10,838 --> 00:06:12,640
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
Yes?
124
00:06:14,307 --> 00:06:15,976
No, that's what you signed.
125
00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:18,311
Oh, my God.
126
00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:20,848
[***]
127
00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:25,218
Come on, come on, come on!
Go, go, go, go!
128
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:28,155
Yeah!
Oh, swish!
129
00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:29,423
[BOTH CHEER]
130
00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:31,258
Yeah!
Yeah!
131
00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:33,661
ANNOUNCER:
Shante Jackson.
132
00:06:33,661 --> 00:06:35,195
You know it. Heh.
133
00:06:35,195 --> 00:06:38,432
Oh, my, my, your lady
is quite the ball handler.
134
00:06:38,432 --> 00:06:40,133
Oh, here's hoping.
135
00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:43,136
You know, Stasha and I talked
for two hours before the game.
136
00:06:43,136 --> 00:06:45,138
I feel like we've made
quite the connection.
137
00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:48,509
Yeah, how about
these VIP all-access passes.
138
00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:50,043
Awesome.
They're so great.
139
00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:52,379
I think I'm gonna go
get my half-price chalupa.
140
00:06:52,379 --> 00:06:54,815
Oh, nice.
All right, Shante! Nice!
141
00:06:54,815 --> 00:07:00,921
Yeah, made out with her last
night. Yes, I did. Oh, yeah.
142
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:03,090
Are you guys
with Stasha and Shante?
143
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:05,759
I believe we're in the budding
stages of something special.
144
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,861
Hey, welcome.
Oh, thank you.
145
00:07:07,861 --> 00:07:10,664
We're the other
New York boyfriends.
146
00:07:10,664 --> 00:07:13,467
Excuse me, I'm sorry.
Um...
147
00:07:13,467 --> 00:07:16,436
But what do you mean
by "New York boyfriends?"
148
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:19,573
Well, the girls keep men
in cities all over the country.
149
00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:21,208
Well, the six they play in.
150
00:07:22,743 --> 00:07:26,379
Um, I'm not quite sure
I understand, uh...
151
00:07:26,379 --> 00:07:27,915
Heh. You must be with Stasha.
152
00:07:27,915 --> 00:07:29,517
She likes them sweet
and innocent.
153
00:07:29,517 --> 00:07:32,986
Well, she made no mention
of anyone else, so, you know.
154
00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:34,722
Dude,
what did you think?
155
00:07:34,722 --> 00:07:37,024
They're elite athletes
making thousands of dollars
156
00:07:37,024 --> 00:07:39,860
playing in front of hundreds
of cheering fans.
157
00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:42,796
You can't expect them
to settle down with one guy.
158
00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:46,466
Dude.
Oh.
159
00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,636
[TIMER BUZZES]
160
00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:51,004
[***]
161
00:07:53,373 --> 00:07:55,509
Oh, you gotta be--
Don't start.
162
00:07:55,509 --> 00:08:00,347
It looks like the inside
of I Dream of Jeannie's bottle.
163
00:08:00,347 --> 00:08:02,115
Fresh reference.
164
00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:05,619
You're gonna make an excellent
grandfather for our kid.
165
00:08:05,619 --> 00:08:06,920
Good evening and welcome.
166
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:08,722
Why doesn't everyone
have a seat?
167
00:08:08,722 --> 00:08:11,725
I know.
There aren't any.
168
00:08:15,362 --> 00:08:17,598
So let me ask.
169
00:08:17,598 --> 00:08:19,199
Why are you all here?
170
00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:21,802
Our check cleared?
171
00:08:21,802 --> 00:08:24,705
[AUDREY CHUCKLES]
172
00:08:24,705 --> 00:08:27,575
No, no, no, it's all right.
Humor is always welcome.
173
00:08:27,575 --> 00:08:30,844
So, sir,
feel free to keep trying.
174
00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:34,948
Now, there are things you can do
to enhance your experience.
175
00:08:34,948 --> 00:08:37,585
Things that I believe
could increase your chance
176
00:08:37,585 --> 00:08:39,687
of a successful implantation.
177
00:08:39,687 --> 00:08:43,490
Really?
No, not really.
178
00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:46,326
By creating
a purely positive energy
179
00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:49,597
you increase the chance
of success in whatever you do.
180
00:08:49,597 --> 00:08:51,198
As I have done here.
181
00:08:51,198 --> 00:08:54,001
So you see this
as a big win, huh?
182
00:08:55,335 --> 00:08:56,837
[***]
183
00:08:56,837 --> 00:08:58,572
Mm.
184
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,576
That is so good.
185
00:09:02,576 --> 00:09:04,878
Stealing these steaks
was literally
186
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,947
the smartest thing
you've ever done.
187
00:09:08,649 --> 00:09:10,618
I know, honey, but...
188
00:09:10,618 --> 00:09:12,052
[SIGHS]
189
00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:13,453
But what?
190
00:09:13,453 --> 00:09:16,089
Was it the right thing to do?
191
00:09:16,089 --> 00:09:19,359
Why are you asking that?
You're the one who did this
192
00:09:19,359 --> 00:09:23,597
with what I think
was a spot-on Jeff imitation.
193
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:25,633
Well, what about
"thou shalt not steal"?
194
00:09:25,633 --> 00:09:28,568
What about
"thou shalt sack up"?
195
00:09:29,536 --> 00:09:31,204
Come on.
196
00:09:31,204 --> 00:09:33,206
You know you want it.
197
00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:36,243
I shouldn't,
I shouldn't, I shouldn't.
198
00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:37,845
Jeff's my best friend.
199
00:09:37,845 --> 00:09:40,881
He takes your food,
he insults everything you wear
200
00:09:40,881 --> 00:09:43,617
and he always calls you gay.
201
00:09:44,885 --> 00:09:47,755
Yeah. You're right.
I'm not gay.
202
00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:50,557
Sorry, Jeff.
203
00:09:50,557 --> 00:09:52,760
I'm gonna eat your meat.
204
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:57,698
[***]
205
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,869
I just don't know
why you had to behave that way.
206
00:10:01,869 --> 00:10:03,804
Me? You clocked me
with the pillow.
207
00:10:03,804 --> 00:10:07,107
You know, the, uh,
button hit my ear.
208
00:10:08,742 --> 00:10:10,944
You deserved it.
How humiliating.
209
00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:13,647
Escorted out
of a surrogacy seminar.
210
00:10:15,348 --> 00:10:17,951
You know what? I told you
I didn't wanna go.
211
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:19,586
I told you
it was gonna be stupid.
212
00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:21,054
No, no. It wasn't stupid.
213
00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:23,757
It only became that way
after you walked in.
214
00:10:23,757 --> 00:10:27,060
Come on, Audrey, you can't
be buying into that stuff.
215
00:10:27,060 --> 00:10:30,130
Come on, do I believe candles
and incense can actually help?
216
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:33,433
I don't know.
But I wanna do something.
217
00:10:33,433 --> 00:10:36,003
Something cuckoo?
218
00:10:36,003 --> 00:10:38,706
Okay, you wear your lucky Knicks
jersey every time they play.
219
00:10:38,706 --> 00:10:40,073
Why do you do that?
220
00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:42,976
Because the time I didn't,
they lost.
221
00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:45,846
To the Cavs, Aud.
The Cavs.
222
00:10:46,714 --> 00:10:48,115
But the point is,
223
00:10:48,115 --> 00:10:50,851
I don't try to force you
to wear a Knicks shirt.
224
00:10:50,851 --> 00:10:53,420
Okay, fine. Fine.
I will stop forcing you
225
00:10:53,420 --> 00:10:55,188
to do things you obviously
don't wanna do.
226
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:56,957
If you're gonna
be so negative
227
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:58,759
maybe you shouldn't
be there tomorrow.
228
00:10:58,759 --> 00:11:00,227
I'll go to the chiropractor
instead.
229
00:11:00,227 --> 00:11:03,330
Screwed up my back
sitting on that dog bed.
230
00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:05,165
[***]
231
00:11:07,267 --> 00:11:08,902
[***]
232
00:11:08,902 --> 00:11:12,639
Pass it.
Pass it around. Aw!
233
00:11:12,639 --> 00:11:14,742
[TIMER BUZZES]
234
00:11:14,742 --> 00:11:17,377
ANNOUNCER [OVER PA]:
After double-overtime,
the final score:
235
00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:21,849
The Santa Fe Pueblos, 43.
Your New York Empire, 42.
236
00:11:21,849 --> 00:11:23,683
[RUSSELL GRUMBLES]
237
00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:25,385
The girls are
gonna be bummed.
238
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:28,621
It's time for
some sexual healing.
239
00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:31,158
You go ahead, sir.
I'm, uh...
240
00:11:31,158 --> 00:11:33,961
Wha--?
Just gonna head home,
241
00:11:33,961 --> 00:11:36,463
sit in the shower with my knees
pulled to my chest
242
00:11:36,463 --> 00:11:39,099
and think about
what might have been.
243
00:11:39,099 --> 00:11:41,701
Well, you might have been a man
before you said that.
244
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,672
Sir, Rick said that
the ladies have boyfriends
245
00:11:45,672 --> 00:11:47,474
in every city
where they play.
246
00:11:47,474 --> 00:11:49,209
So?
247
00:11:49,209 --> 00:11:52,880
So I'm nothing more to Stasha
than 127 pounds of boy toy.
248
00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:56,784
Okay. That's
the great news, okay?
249
00:11:56,784 --> 00:11:58,651
There's no strings attached.
250
00:11:58,651 --> 00:12:00,453
This is like
driving a rental car.
251
00:12:00,453 --> 00:12:02,522
You get to drive it around,
beat it all up,
252
00:12:02,522 --> 00:12:05,625
hand it in to the airport, then
it's the next dude's problem.
253
00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:08,061
I'm sorry, sir, but, uh,
254
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:11,364
I was hoping for a deeper
relationship with Stasha.
255
00:12:11,364 --> 00:12:15,035
[RUSSELL WHIMPERS]
I actually thought that she--
256
00:12:15,035 --> 00:12:16,403
[RUSSELL WHIMPERING]
257
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,738
She and I had an
emotional connection.
258
00:12:21,008 --> 00:12:23,343
A chance at a relationship--
[SOBBING]
259
00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:24,978
Okay, stop that.
260
00:12:24,978 --> 00:12:27,214
We are on the verge
of a great evening here.
261
00:12:27,214 --> 00:12:29,249
With big girls, Timmy.
Big ones.
262
00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:33,253
It's like a Vegas buffet
of woman.
263
00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:35,255
My heart's just not in it,
I'm afraid.
264
00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:36,256
[RUSSELL SIGHS]
265
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,591
Why do you always
have to be you?
266
00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:40,227
Why can't you just relax
267
00:12:40,227 --> 00:12:42,695
and accept the joyful
shallowness of it all?
268
00:12:42,695 --> 00:12:45,098
Well, perhaps you're right.
269
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:46,566
You know,
maybe what I need to do
270
00:12:46,566 --> 00:12:48,869
is just enjoy this
relationship for what it is.
271
00:12:48,869 --> 00:12:51,905
Ooh. Okay.
272
00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:53,706
Well, let's sign
the damage waiver
273
00:12:53,706 --> 00:12:55,075
and take these
chicks out for a spin.
274
00:12:55,075 --> 00:12:58,311
All right, let's do it.
Yeah. Hey-oh!
275
00:12:58,311 --> 00:13:00,280
[MARY WELLS'
"MY GUY" PLAYING]
276
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,516
* Nothing you can say
Can tear me away from my guy *
277
00:13:03,516 --> 00:13:05,118
Yeah.
278
00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:07,888
[ALL CHATTERING
AND LAUGHING]
279
00:13:07,888 --> 00:13:09,256
Here. Come here.
280
00:13:09,256 --> 00:13:11,091
* 'Cause I'm stuck like glue *
281
00:13:11,091 --> 00:13:14,261
*To my guy *
282
00:13:14,261 --> 00:13:18,265
* I'm sticking to my guy
Like a stamp to a letter *
283
00:13:18,265 --> 00:13:22,069
* Like birds of a feather
We stick together *
284
00:13:22,069 --> 00:13:24,137
* I'm tellin' you
From the start *
285
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:28,041
* I can't be torn apart
From my guy *
286
00:13:30,043 --> 00:13:31,711
* Nothing you could do *
287
00:13:31,711 --> 00:13:35,548
* Could make me untrue
To my guy *
288
00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:37,050
* My guy *
289
00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:38,818
Oh, yeah.
* Nothing you could buy *
290
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:42,489
* Could make me tell a lie
To my guy *
291
00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:44,624
* My guy *
292
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:47,560
* I gave my guy
My word of honor *
293
00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:49,129
[CAMERA CLICKING]
294
00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:52,365
* To be faithful
And I'm gonna *
295
00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:58,038
* You best be believing
I won't be deceiving my guy *
296
00:13:59,706 --> 00:14:01,441
[***]
297
00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:07,080
Why are you fidgeting?
298
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:10,417
Jeff's gonna know
we ate his steaks.
299
00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:11,919
How?
300
00:14:11,919 --> 00:14:14,121
Because he's gonna
smell them on us.
301
00:14:14,121 --> 00:14:16,656
You're being paranoid.
Am I, really?
302
00:14:16,656 --> 00:14:18,858
Remember when I lost that
Slim Jim in the couch?
303
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:21,328
He walked in,
turned the cushions over
304
00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:22,495
and he found it.
305
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,632
That was how we met.
306
00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:29,436
Okay, here he comes.
Here he comes. Just be cool.
307
00:14:29,436 --> 00:14:31,838
Hey.
308
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:34,574
What's up, T-bone?
309
00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:41,014
J-bone.
310
00:14:42,449 --> 00:14:44,084
Hey, Jeff.
311
00:14:45,318 --> 00:14:47,354
Uh, hey, could I get
a cheeseburger?
312
00:14:47,354 --> 00:14:49,322
Boy, you know,
I'll have one too.
313
00:14:49,322 --> 00:14:53,526
I can't remember the last time
that I had meat.
314
00:14:53,526 --> 00:14:55,395
Speaking of meat, uh,
315
00:14:55,395 --> 00:15:00,600
does, uh, our building smell
like beef lately?
316
00:15:02,369 --> 00:15:07,374
I wouldn't know. Because I lost
my sense of smell as a kid.
317
00:15:07,374 --> 00:15:10,310
Why haven't I said anything
until now?
318
00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,180
I don't know.
319
00:15:14,347 --> 00:15:16,283
No.
320
00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:18,085
Just no.
321
00:15:19,119 --> 00:15:20,320
Hey, guys.
ADAM: Hey.
322
00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:21,821
JENNIFER: Hey.
Hey, Jeff.
323
00:15:21,821 --> 00:15:25,492
You and Audrey ready for
"operation all up in me"?
324
00:15:25,492 --> 00:15:27,694
That's right. Good luck.
BRENDA: Thanks.
325
00:15:27,694 --> 00:15:29,162
Is it a big procedure?
326
00:15:29,162 --> 00:15:30,863
No, the whole thing
will only take a minute.
327
00:15:30,863 --> 00:15:33,466
Which is how long it would take
if Jeff did it to Audrey
328
00:15:33,466 --> 00:15:36,503
the old-fashioned way.
[ALL CHUCKLE]
329
00:15:36,503 --> 00:15:39,072
Yeah, I spoil her.
330
00:15:41,074 --> 00:15:42,775
Yeah, she's all mad
331
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:45,345
because I won't get into this
whole new age-y thing with her.
332
00:15:45,345 --> 00:15:47,880
Well, she's probably
really emotional.
333
00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:49,516
You know,
cut her a break.
334
00:15:49,516 --> 00:15:52,419
Heh, cut her a steak?
335
00:15:54,554 --> 00:15:57,490
Man, that doesn't even
make any sense.
336
00:15:57,490 --> 00:16:00,193
You're blowing it.
337
00:16:00,193 --> 00:16:02,562
You know, maybe she's just
trying to find a way
338
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:03,930
to be more involved.
339
00:16:03,930 --> 00:16:05,465
Well, why didn't
she just say that?
340
00:16:05,465 --> 00:16:08,368
My guess is
she probably did.
341
00:16:08,368 --> 00:16:11,571
Look, you know what?
Just go along with it.
342
00:16:11,571 --> 00:16:13,506
Bottom line,
we're gonna turkey baste me
343
00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:15,275
and in a week,
we'll know if it took.
344
00:16:15,275 --> 00:16:17,610
And if it didn't,
it's not a big deal.
345
00:16:17,610 --> 00:16:20,580
You'll just write another
check and we'll try again.
346
00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:21,914
Another check?
347
00:16:21,914 --> 00:16:26,053
Yeah, you have to pay the clinic
every time you try.
348
00:16:29,056 --> 00:16:31,691
[RELAXING MUSIC
PLAYING ON STEREO]
349
00:16:35,362 --> 00:16:39,432
Welcome to this
life-giving experience.
350
00:16:41,068 --> 00:16:43,270
Jeff, you did this for me?
351
00:16:43,270 --> 00:16:46,806
For you, for me, for her.
352
00:16:46,806 --> 00:16:49,142
The whole universe, really.
353
00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:51,444
Oh, babe, you heard me.
354
00:16:52,312 --> 00:16:53,813
I love you again.
355
00:16:53,813 --> 00:16:55,582
Okay. I'm gonna go
tell them we're ready.
356
00:16:57,750 --> 00:16:59,886
[SIGHS]
357
00:16:59,886 --> 00:17:01,788
Oh, you crazy bastard.
358
00:17:01,788 --> 00:17:05,358
And you, saddle up and get
this right the first time.
359
00:17:06,793 --> 00:17:09,162
[***]
360
00:17:14,834 --> 00:17:16,836
See you, White Dynamite.
361
00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:18,471
Bye.
362
00:17:18,471 --> 00:17:20,440
Thank you for the fun, Timmy.
363
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:24,411
I found you to be a worthy
adversary between my sheets.
364
00:17:24,411 --> 00:17:27,080
I'm happy to have been
the alley to your oop.
365
00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:39,592
[TIMMY SIGHS]
366
00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:41,361
Well, sir.
367
00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:43,363
I must admit,
I do have to thank you
368
00:17:43,363 --> 00:17:47,033
for showing me the joys
of a stringless relationship.
369
00:17:47,033 --> 00:17:50,403
Yeah. No strings, man.
370
00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:53,840
Mr. Dunbar, what is it?
371
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:55,808
Nothing.
372
00:17:55,808 --> 00:17:58,378
I think I've fallen
for that big-boned gal.
373
00:17:58,378 --> 00:18:01,181
And now she's gone.
374
00:18:02,149 --> 00:18:05,051
Oh, sir.
Don't look at me.
375
00:18:05,051 --> 00:18:07,287
[SOBBING]
It hurts, Tim.
376
00:18:07,287 --> 00:18:09,689
It hurts so much.
377
00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:11,691
[RUSSELL WHIMPERING]
378
00:18:12,892 --> 00:18:15,162
[***]
379
00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:18,731
Hey.
380
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:24,103
Don't "hey" me.
Where are the steaks?
381
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,273
Uh, I couldn't live
with the guilt.
382
00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:28,608
So I rewrapped the box
and I gave it back to Jeff.
383
00:18:29,842 --> 00:18:33,012
Wow. How mad was he?
I don't know.
384
00:18:33,012 --> 00:18:35,315
I did it unanimously.
385
00:18:38,017 --> 00:18:39,586
It's the other one?
386
00:18:41,188 --> 00:18:44,424
Anyway, um, so I left them
on his doorstep
387
00:18:44,424 --> 00:18:46,293
and I even weighted
them down a little bit
388
00:18:46,293 --> 00:18:48,127
so he wouldn't notice
some were missing.
389
00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:52,632
Well, at least
he'll never know it was us.
390
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,703
Nine...
391
00:18:56,703 --> 00:18:58,705
Only 10.
392
00:19:00,373 --> 00:19:03,543
"From the desk
of Adam Rhodes."
393
00:19:10,049 --> 00:19:12,419
So, uh, I just talked
to Dr. Sachs.
394
00:19:12,419 --> 00:19:14,621
Yeah?
Didn't happen this time.
395
00:19:14,621 --> 00:19:17,990
But he says he is confident
we will get Brenda pregnant
396
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:20,126
the next two, three tries.
397
00:19:20,126 --> 00:19:22,629
Two or three?
398
00:19:22,629 --> 00:19:24,997
[GROANS]
399
00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:26,566
Honey, don't be sad.
400
00:19:26,566 --> 00:19:29,302
We are gonna make this happen.
401
00:19:29,302 --> 00:19:31,638
I don't care
if it takes 10 times.
402
00:19:31,638 --> 00:19:33,273
Oh, jeez.
403
00:19:34,641 --> 00:19:38,778
Oh, Jeff. See?
This is the real you.
404
00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:40,647
Ten times?
405
00:19:40,647 --> 00:19:43,916
Oh, you really
wanted it to happen.
406
00:19:47,787 --> 00:19:51,924
I did. I really did.
407
00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:53,726
[***]
408
00:19:58,431 --> 00:19:59,899
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
409
00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:01,234
Yo.
410
00:20:04,003 --> 00:20:05,738
You can stop pining, sir.
411
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:08,608
I, uh,
have a surprise for you.
412
00:20:10,176 --> 00:20:13,145
Stand up, White Dynamite.
413
00:20:13,145 --> 00:20:15,482
Shante. Oh, my God.
414
00:20:15,482 --> 00:20:17,650
BOTH:
Mm.
415
00:20:17,650 --> 00:20:19,652
I told her how much
you were missing her, sir.
416
00:20:19,652 --> 00:20:22,789
So I'm taking you
on the road with me.
417
00:20:22,789 --> 00:20:25,392
You are? Wee!
418
00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:27,660
Where are we going?
419
00:20:27,660 --> 00:20:30,330
Our first game's in Tulsa.
Tulsa?
420
00:20:30,330 --> 00:20:32,164
And then it's off to Tacoma.
421
00:20:32,164 --> 00:20:34,200
What's Tacoma?
422
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:37,337
I don't think this is working
out even though you're great.
423
00:20:37,337 --> 00:20:40,139
Hey, I flew all the way
across country.
424
00:20:40,139 --> 00:20:42,208
This is happening.
425
00:20:42,208 --> 00:20:44,477
What do you mean? No, no.
426
00:20:44,477 --> 00:20:46,245
Timmy, do something.
427
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:48,180
Timmy, call security.
428
00:20:48,180 --> 00:20:50,817
No means no.
429
00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:52,885
[***]
430
00:20:57,857 --> 00:21:00,593
[***]
30466
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