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1
00:00:03,018 --> 00:00:05,543
I'm going to introduce some real class
into this town.
2
00:00:05,621 --> 00:00:09,182
Bingo games, pinochle,
hayrides, parties, everything.
3
00:00:09,258 --> 00:00:12,716
-Gee, that sounds great, Jazz.
-That's only the beginning.
4
00:00:12,795 --> 00:00:16,925
Ten ball in the corner pocket.
Three-cushion ricochet the hard way.
5
00:00:20,202 --> 00:00:23,296
Hold the phone. Cease. Desist. Halt.
6
00:00:23,572 --> 00:00:26,905
Slow down, slippery.
You got a long way to slide.
7
00:00:26,976 --> 00:00:30,241
I hate to intrude
on your empire building, buster...
8
00:00:30,312 --> 00:00:32,712
but I am top cat around here.
9
00:00:32,782 --> 00:00:36,309
That's all like passe, friend.
A new breed is taking over.
10
00:00:36,385 --> 00:00:39,445
If you don't mind, my pals and I
are having a little game of pool.
11
00:00:39,522 --> 00:00:41,217
You get the point?
12
00:01:26,969 --> 00:01:29,130
This is the big city.
13
00:01:29,205 --> 00:01:33,335
Each day, hundreds of people arrive
seeking a new way of life...
14
00:01:33,409 --> 00:01:35,536
searching for the big break.
15
00:01:35,611 --> 00:01:38,273
And here we see
a pair of hardy fortune seekers...
16
00:01:38,347 --> 00:01:40,907
newly arrived on the city scene.
17
00:01:44,620 --> 00:01:46,815
Jazz, wake up. We're here.
18
00:01:50,092 --> 00:01:52,253
Right. Let's go, Bo.
19
00:01:55,431 --> 00:01:56,989
You all right, Jazz?
20
00:01:57,066 --> 00:02:01,264
Yeah. But you better watch that first step.
It's a doozie.
21
00:02:03,038 --> 00:02:04,130
Here we are, Bo.
22
00:02:04,206 --> 00:02:07,801
The big town where an agile mind
can find new worlds to conquer.
23
00:02:07,877 --> 00:02:10,471
You mean, you're gonna get a job, Jazz?
24
00:02:10,546 --> 00:02:13,140
What a revolting thought. No.
25
00:02:13,282 --> 00:02:15,648
I'm going to find us
a nice soft touch somewhere.
26
00:02:15,718 --> 00:02:18,448
And in no time, we'll be in the big time.
27
00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:21,785
Sure beats Syracuse, Jazz.
When do we start?
28
00:02:23,492 --> 00:02:25,483
What's with all that banging?
29
00:02:26,996 --> 00:02:29,590
What's up, Jazz? Where they all going?
30
00:02:29,665 --> 00:02:31,462
I don't know, Bo.
31
00:02:31,533 --> 00:02:35,299
I left the crystal ball back in Syracuse.
But I'm gonna find out.
32
00:02:38,374 --> 00:02:39,602
All right, you clods.
33
00:02:39,675 --> 00:02:43,270
When you hear the sound of the cymbals,
set a few speed records getting here.
34
00:02:43,345 --> 00:02:46,212
-What's cooking, T.C.?
-Yeah, how come you banged?
35
00:02:46,282 --> 00:02:49,115
Just a little stockholder's meeting, fellas.
36
00:02:54,123 --> 00:02:57,320
I wish they'd fix that hole
in the bowling alley door.
37
00:02:57,393 --> 00:03:00,658
All right, Benny. I want a report
on the take from the bingo games.
38
00:03:00,729 --> 00:03:04,256
This is the promised land, all right.
And that T.C. guy don't know it...
39
00:03:04,333 --> 00:03:07,200
but he's about to be unseated
as the local top cat.
40
00:03:09,004 --> 00:03:12,462
All right, fellas. Back to work.
The company can't afford any idle hands.
41
00:03:12,541 --> 00:03:14,771
You can't expect me
to do everything now, can you?
42
00:03:14,843 --> 00:03:19,177
Let's move. When I say move,
I wanna see nothing but blurs, get it?
43
00:03:23,619 --> 00:03:27,146
Must be one of those occupational hazards
you hear about.
44
00:03:27,222 --> 00:03:29,850
Okay, on your feet, men.
This ain't no time to rest.
45
00:03:29,925 --> 00:03:32,792
-We're going.
-We're gone, man.
46
00:03:32,861 --> 00:03:35,625
And let's have those reports back fast like.
47
00:03:36,565 --> 00:03:40,467
The phone again. How can I concentrate
with all this intolerance?
48
00:03:43,572 --> 00:03:46,473
Hello? Who? Officer Dibble?
49
00:03:47,276 --> 00:03:50,541
I'm sorry.
You have dialed the wrong number.
50
00:03:50,612 --> 00:03:53,274
Please check the proper number
in the yellow book.
51
00:03:53,349 --> 00:03:55,283
This is a recording.
52
00:03:56,118 --> 00:03:58,609
Hold it right there, T.C.
53
00:03:58,954 --> 00:04:01,479
Caught you red-handed
using the police phone...
54
00:04:01,557 --> 00:04:04,720
and interfering with official business,
didn't I?
55
00:04:04,793 --> 00:04:06,385
You'll get 30 days for this.
56
00:04:06,462 --> 00:04:09,761
Just a minute, Officer Dibble.
Let me hear that voice again.
57
00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:11,959
Surely you must have sung
at the Met at one time.
58
00:04:12,034 --> 00:04:14,002
-Well, l--
-Come, come. Don't be modest.
59
00:04:14,069 --> 00:04:18,130
Let me hear that golden voice once more,
that deplorable baritone.
60
00:04:18,207 --> 00:04:19,538
All right.
61
00:04:28,417 --> 00:04:30,647
Wonderful. Yuck.
62
00:04:30,719 --> 00:04:34,485
What range. What power.
Now let's hear it from back further.
63
00:04:34,556 --> 00:04:37,184
Okay. I'll go down to the end of the alley.
64
00:04:37,259 --> 00:04:38,385
That's it, Dibble.
65
00:04:38,460 --> 00:04:42,453
Go way back, so I can fully appreciate
those pear-shaped tonsils.
66
00:04:42,531 --> 00:04:44,260
-How's this?
-Fine.
67
00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:45,823
So long, Dibble.
68
00:04:45,968 --> 00:04:48,027
So long, Top Cat. Thanks.
69
00:04:49,038 --> 00:04:50,437
Now wait a minute.
70
00:04:50,806 --> 00:04:53,366
I'd be doggone if he didn't do it again.
71
00:04:53,442 --> 00:04:56,536
I had him,
and he slipped right out of my hands.
72
00:04:57,312 --> 00:05:00,042
-Begging your pardon, Officer.
-What is it?
73
00:05:00,115 --> 00:05:03,744
Kind sir, perhaps you'll assist us.
We're newly arrived in your fair city.
74
00:05:03,819 --> 00:05:06,982
And before we find a job,
as is our usual habit...
75
00:05:07,056 --> 00:05:09,217
we would like to perform
our daily good deed.
76
00:05:09,291 --> 00:05:11,987
Like, is there an old lady
we can help cross the street...
77
00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:16,020
walk your police dog,
perhaps clean up this dirty alley?
78
00:05:16,432 --> 00:05:19,799
Say, now that's real swell of you guys.
79
00:05:19,868 --> 00:05:23,065
I've been trying to get this alley
cleaned out for years.
80
00:05:23,172 --> 00:05:26,005
We're just in time, Bo.
Let's show our gratitude.
81
00:05:26,075 --> 00:05:28,509
You don't have to do that, fellas.
82
00:05:28,844 --> 00:05:32,007
Just clean out this alley,
and you'll be doing your good deed.
83
00:05:32,081 --> 00:05:35,209
Right you are, sir.
Come on, Bo. We got work to do.
84
00:05:35,284 --> 00:05:38,845
How delightful. How lucky we are.
85
00:05:39,388 --> 00:05:42,289
It's too bad Top Cat ain't like that.
86
00:05:45,294 --> 00:05:48,730
You know, maybe I should palm Dibble off
to the Met.
87
00:05:49,031 --> 00:05:53,832
That way, at least he'll be out of my alley.
But I cannot be angry today.
88
00:05:53,902 --> 00:05:58,566
It's almost zero hour. Time for my date
with the top doll in town.
89
00:06:03,946 --> 00:06:05,573
What happened to the alley?
90
00:06:05,647 --> 00:06:09,777
What is this?
Clean ashcans, papers piled up neat.
91
00:06:09,852 --> 00:06:12,218
Everything in order. The joint's a mess.
92
00:06:12,287 --> 00:06:14,221
Why, it looks like a hospital.
93
00:06:14,289 --> 00:06:17,656
One of the boys must have flipped.
I'll give them the signal.
94
00:06:22,431 --> 00:06:25,628
-Hey T.C., what's up?
-Benny, where is everybody?
95
00:06:25,701 --> 00:06:28,192
Where's Choo Choo, the Spook, Fancy,
all of them?
96
00:06:28,270 --> 00:06:30,670
They're all over on the East Side.
97
00:06:30,739 --> 00:06:33,731
Some guy named Jazz
is giving us bongo lessons.
98
00:06:33,809 --> 00:06:38,473
Bongo lessons? I can endure a little
insubordination for the sake of culture.
99
00:06:38,814 --> 00:06:42,716
I'll just handle this later.
Besides, I can't be angry today, Benny boy.
100
00:06:42,784 --> 00:06:45,947
Yeah, today's the day you see your girl.
101
00:06:46,155 --> 00:06:48,316
Good for you, Benny.
102
00:06:48,390 --> 00:06:51,382
Now, quickly with the flowers
and the candy. Move, boy.
103
00:06:51,460 --> 00:06:52,586
Right, T.C.
104
00:06:53,762 --> 00:06:56,287
In the spring a young man's fancy--
105
00:06:56,365 --> 00:06:57,798
What took you so long?
106
00:06:57,866 --> 00:07:02,667
Sorry, T.C. Officer Dibble gave me
some static for picking flowers in the park.
107
00:07:02,738 --> 00:07:04,831
It's okay. Just let me have them.
108
00:07:05,707 --> 00:07:09,643
Let me see. Flowers, candy, me.
What else could she want?
109
00:07:09,745 --> 00:07:13,681
Well, if she ever saw me,
she'd throw rocks at you.
110
00:07:15,484 --> 00:07:18,715
Just be a good boy, Benny,
and let me be the clever one.
111
00:07:18,787 --> 00:07:21,381
The Top Cat does the jokes, remember?
112
00:07:21,523 --> 00:07:23,753
Well, so long and arrivederci!
113
00:07:27,229 --> 00:07:30,392
Here we are, 77 Dreamsville Strip.
114
00:07:30,632 --> 00:07:35,092
I'd better turn the charm down to low
lest it overpower the poor sweet child.
115
00:07:37,673 --> 00:07:40,699
The door of love swings open.
116
00:07:41,109 --> 00:07:43,475
Greetings, my dear.
I bring flowers for you.
117
00:07:43,545 --> 00:07:47,572
But they shrank from shame
beside such beauty as yours.
118
00:07:49,518 --> 00:07:52,715
Very strange behavior
for a girl so much in love.
119
00:07:52,821 --> 00:07:54,846
Must be a joke, of course.
120
00:07:55,490 --> 00:07:58,653
Delightful sense of humor.
I like that in a girl.
121
00:08:00,662 --> 00:08:02,095
Funny.
122
00:08:05,234 --> 00:08:09,432
Enough of this idle humor.
It's time for the park and the birds, Trella.
123
00:08:09,504 --> 00:08:11,233
I'm sorry, T.C.
124
00:08:11,306 --> 00:08:14,537
But I have a date. Jazz is inside.
125
00:08:15,777 --> 00:08:18,712
But thanks for the candy
and the flowers, anyway.
126
00:08:20,849 --> 00:08:23,579
Just a minute.
What's with all this "Jazz" jazz?
127
00:08:24,486 --> 00:08:26,454
That's A.T. Jazz to you, man.
128
00:08:26,521 --> 00:08:29,490
-What's the A.T. stand for?
-All that.
129
00:08:29,558 --> 00:08:30,820
It figures.
130
00:08:30,993 --> 00:08:32,961
Look, pal. It's you who don't get it.
131
00:08:33,028 --> 00:08:35,724
Me and the chick
have a regular thing going. Get me?
132
00:08:35,797 --> 00:08:39,096
Sorry, chum. That's all over.
I'm in. You're out.
133
00:08:39,167 --> 00:08:41,635
Here's your posies and your candy.
134
00:08:42,004 --> 00:08:43,631
The box, that is.
135
00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:47,832
This boy is really asking for it.
136
00:08:47,909 --> 00:08:50,309
Jazz, you in there?
137
00:08:50,846 --> 00:08:52,370
You guessed it, Chester.
138
00:08:52,447 --> 00:08:55,610
Now, run along
and play on the freeway, will you?
139
00:08:56,718 --> 00:08:59,448
Relax, baby. The first team is back.
140
00:09:00,722 --> 00:09:02,815
That rug bit was real cute.
141
00:09:03,225 --> 00:09:06,786
But it ain't nothing to what
an old inner tube and a hook can do.
142
00:09:11,033 --> 00:09:13,263
Where did we leave off yesterday?
143
00:09:13,335 --> 00:09:17,396
Yes, I remember.
I said I wasn't the type to kiss and run.
144
00:09:28,684 --> 00:09:31,118
You didn't make out so good, T.C.?
145
00:09:31,186 --> 00:09:33,586
I gotta think, Benny.
I gotta collect my thoughts.
146
00:09:33,655 --> 00:09:36,920
Let's drop into the club for a while.
A little pool will keep me cool.
147
00:09:38,593 --> 00:09:41,494
Now you guys stick with Jazz,
and you'll really swing.
148
00:09:41,563 --> 00:09:44,157
I'm going to introduce some real class
into this town.
149
00:09:44,232 --> 00:09:47,668
Bingo games, pinochle,
hayrides, parties, everything.
150
00:09:47,736 --> 00:09:51,297
-Gee, that sounds great, Jazz.
-That's only the beginning.
151
00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:54,968
Ten ball in the corner pocket.
Three-cushion ricochet the hard way.
152
00:09:58,847 --> 00:10:01,543
There will be a slight fee,
and I'll need volunteers.
153
00:10:01,616 --> 00:10:04,585
Hold the phone. Cease. Desist. Halt.
154
00:10:04,786 --> 00:10:08,085
Slow down, slippery.
You got a long way to slide.
155
00:10:08,156 --> 00:10:12,024
Well, well, well. I guess this joint
don't care who it lets in here.
156
00:10:12,094 --> 00:10:15,291
I hate to intrude
on your empire building, buster...
157
00:10:15,364 --> 00:10:17,832
but I'm top cat around here.
158
00:10:17,899 --> 00:10:21,357
That's all like passe, friend.
A new breed is taking over.
159
00:10:21,436 --> 00:10:24,371
If you don't mind, my pals and I
are having a little game of pool.
160
00:10:24,439 --> 00:10:26,100
You get the point?
161
00:10:28,143 --> 00:10:30,941
Why, that chiseling phony Jazz,
stealing my gang.
162
00:10:31,012 --> 00:10:34,778
How do you like that? I relax for a minute
and the place is full of sharpies.
163
00:10:34,850 --> 00:10:36,784
Look, T.C. There's Choo Choo.
164
00:10:38,086 --> 00:10:40,350
Hiya, T.C. Hiya, Benny. What's new?
165
00:10:40,422 --> 00:10:44,882
Choo Choo, what are you doing to me?
That sign is advertising Jazz's bingo party.
166
00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:47,053
What's wrong with my bingo parties?
167
00:10:47,129 --> 00:10:50,257
Nothing, T.C.
Jazz gives two bits an hour for this.
168
00:10:50,332 --> 00:10:52,129
I've got to support a sick mother.
169
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:56,603
Go on. The only sick mother you support
runs on a wet track at Pimlico.
170
00:10:57,606 --> 00:10:59,267
See you around, T.C.
171
00:11:01,209 --> 00:11:04,645
Look at that.
He's even beating my pinochle prices.
172
00:11:04,713 --> 00:11:07,181
Yeah, T.C. You charge $1.50.
173
00:11:09,317 --> 00:11:13,515
I got to think of something
to send that Jazz far away. Let me think.
174
00:11:14,256 --> 00:11:15,985
Of course. Why not?
175
00:11:16,324 --> 00:11:19,487
All we got to do is dream up
a better setup for Jazz...
176
00:11:19,561 --> 00:11:23,930
preferably far away,
like for instance Alaska or the Fiji islands.
177
00:11:23,999 --> 00:11:25,261
How you gonna do that, T.C.?
178
00:11:25,333 --> 00:11:27,392
All we got to do is get the word to Jazz...
179
00:11:27,469 --> 00:11:29,403
that I'm leaving town for good.
180
00:11:29,471 --> 00:11:32,804
When Jazz hears about it, he'll figure
I'm moving in on something better.
181
00:11:32,874 --> 00:11:35,775
And, naturally,
he's going to try to beat me to it.
182
00:11:35,844 --> 00:11:40,008
-But I won't be there.
-You're a genius, T.C.
183
00:11:40,115 --> 00:11:42,276
I'll rush right over and tell Jazz.
184
00:11:43,585 --> 00:11:47,248
Hold it! Let us not be so crude.
185
00:11:47,489 --> 00:11:51,255
Why, he's too shrewd to fall for it
right off the bat. We must be sly.
186
00:11:51,326 --> 00:11:54,261
We must let the word slip out, subtle like.
187
00:11:54,329 --> 00:11:56,490
Now what we need an informer.
188
00:11:56,565 --> 00:11:59,295
And who is the one guy
that can never keep a secret?
189
00:11:59,367 --> 00:12:01,631
-Brain, who else?
-Right. Get him over here.
190
00:12:01,703 --> 00:12:03,500
On the double, chief.
191
00:12:04,239 --> 00:12:06,537
-You wanted me, T.C.?
-Yeah, Brain.
192
00:12:06,641 --> 00:12:09,804
Benny, don't you have
an appointment somewhere?
193
00:12:09,945 --> 00:12:11,640
Who, me? No....
194
00:12:12,614 --> 00:12:16,778
I get it. I'd better get out of here.
So long, fellows!
195
00:12:18,286 --> 00:12:19,776
What's up?
196
00:12:19,988 --> 00:12:24,550
Brain, you're the only guy I can trust.
My one true loyal friend.
197
00:12:24,626 --> 00:12:28,153
I want you to get all my gear packed,
everything, but quietly, no noise.
198
00:12:28,296 --> 00:12:30,662
Gee, T.C., you mean you're leaving?
199
00:12:30,899 --> 00:12:34,232
Quiet, Brain! You never know
who might be listening.
200
00:12:34,302 --> 00:12:35,769
This is top-secret stuff.
201
00:12:35,837 --> 00:12:39,705
I don't want anyone to know
about the Zulu diamonds in Diambodi.
202
00:12:39,774 --> 00:12:42,868
So mum's the word, Brain.
Just you and me know.
203
00:12:42,944 --> 00:12:44,036
Can you keep this a secret?
204
00:12:44,112 --> 00:12:47,673
You know me, T.C.,
I wouldn't breathe a word.
205
00:12:47,849 --> 00:12:49,908
I'll go pack your bags now.
206
00:12:50,952 --> 00:12:53,318
There goes a good, useful kid.
207
00:12:53,455 --> 00:12:56,515
He won't breathe a word,
unless Jazz asks him.
208
00:12:56,825 --> 00:12:58,656
And now for step two.
209
00:13:00,228 --> 00:13:03,561
I tell you, Bo, we got a good thing here.
Just give me a little time...
210
00:13:03,632 --> 00:13:07,261
and I'll have Top Cat's bunch
working for me for peanuts.
211
00:13:07,369 --> 00:13:10,805
Come, this is as quiet a spot
as any in town.
212
00:13:10,872 --> 00:13:13,204
That corner over there will do just fine.
213
00:13:13,275 --> 00:13:15,175
You got all the books, Benny? Good.
214
00:13:15,243 --> 00:13:17,734
Let's get right to work.
We haven't got much time.
215
00:13:17,812 --> 00:13:19,837
I'm right behind you, T.C.
216
00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:24,348
Gee, what do you suppose
T.C. is doing with all those books?
217
00:13:24,486 --> 00:13:28,513
Why, it's just a feeble attempt
to bridge the Brain's gap. Relax.
218
00:13:28,623 --> 00:13:31,387
Now for the Swahili lessons.
Check me out.
219
00:13:35,463 --> 00:13:36,623
How's that, Benny?
220
00:13:36,698 --> 00:13:40,429
I can still detect a strong American accent.
221
00:13:40,769 --> 00:13:43,670
-How about your Zambezi?
-Zambezi?
222
00:13:46,608 --> 00:13:48,542
-Great. You know them all now.
-Good.
223
00:13:48,610 --> 00:13:52,706
Now I can pick up the passport
while you check our boat reservations.
224
00:13:52,781 --> 00:13:56,273
T.C., what's with all the language
and books routine?
225
00:13:56,384 --> 00:13:58,875
You plan on finishing grade school?
226
00:14:00,221 --> 00:14:04,214
You see, we thought
we might just buzz over to the UN...
227
00:14:04,292 --> 00:14:08,228
and catch a few speeches.
Broaden our knowledge of world affairs.
228
00:14:08,296 --> 00:14:10,457
See you around, Jazz. Ta-ta.
229
00:14:10,532 --> 00:14:13,524
Pretty clever, that T.C.
I know there's something cooking...
230
00:14:13,602 --> 00:14:16,162
and I know just where to find out what.
231
00:14:19,441 --> 00:14:21,807
Thanks a lot for the pizza, Jazz.
232
00:14:21,876 --> 00:14:24,208
-It's very kind of you.
-That's all right, pal.
233
00:14:24,279 --> 00:14:27,442
I always take care of my friends.
We are friends, you know?
234
00:14:27,515 --> 00:14:29,949
Sure. Anchovies and peppers, too.
235
00:14:30,018 --> 00:14:32,714
Nothing is too good for a buddy of mine.
236
00:14:32,887 --> 00:14:35,048
Now, incidentally, buddy...
237
00:14:35,123 --> 00:14:38,581
how come T.C. is so big
on the foreign lingo kick?
238
00:14:38,660 --> 00:14:41,458
I don't know. T.C. never tells me anything.
239
00:14:43,431 --> 00:14:45,831
What are you doing with my pizza?
240
00:14:47,035 --> 00:14:48,696
Some pal you are.
241
00:14:49,070 --> 00:14:51,732
You don't even know
any secret information.
242
00:14:54,042 --> 00:14:57,341
This is sure nice of you, Jazz.
I've been waiting to see...
243
00:14:57,412 --> 00:14:59,744
The Creature That Ate the Monster
for weeks.
244
00:14:59,814 --> 00:15:01,839
I'm only too glad to take you.
245
00:15:01,916 --> 00:15:04,714
Let me have two cushiony loges
for me and my buddy.
246
00:15:04,786 --> 00:15:06,583
Speaking of buddies...
247
00:15:06,655 --> 00:15:09,886
how come my buddy T.C.
is taking all those language courses?
248
00:15:09,958 --> 00:15:13,450
Like how should I know, Jazz?
He never tells me nothing.
249
00:15:13,528 --> 00:15:16,190
Forget those tickets, lady.
I've been double-crossed.
250
00:15:16,264 --> 00:15:17,788
Fair-weather friend.
251
00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:22,531
I guess I'll never find out
why the creature ate the monster.
252
00:15:24,639 --> 00:15:27,574
Thanks for helping me
with T.C.'s luggage, Jazz.
253
00:15:27,642 --> 00:15:29,837
Anything for you, little pal.
254
00:15:29,911 --> 00:15:33,608
Tell me, Brain,
where is T.C. heading for with all this?
255
00:15:33,815 --> 00:15:35,305
It's a secret.
256
00:15:35,383 --> 00:15:39,979
I ain't supposed to tell anyone
about the Zulu diamonds in Diambodi.
257
00:15:40,055 --> 00:15:41,852
So don't ask me.
258
00:15:42,223 --> 00:15:46,557
It sounds great.
I wonder why he keeps it a secret?
259
00:15:46,728 --> 00:15:48,628
It's such a soft touch.
260
00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:51,461
There are hundreds of diamonds
lying on the ground...
261
00:15:51,533 --> 00:15:54,400
-ready to be picked up by anyone.
-Diamonds?
262
00:15:56,438 --> 00:16:00,135
-I thought you were helping me, Jazz.
-Later, Brain.
263
00:16:00,208 --> 00:16:02,699
Right now I got to catch me a fast plane.
264
00:16:06,047 --> 00:16:09,483
-He went for it.
-What are you guys doing in the trunk?
265
00:16:09,551 --> 00:16:12,850
The trip is off, Brain.
Jazz is going to make it instead.
266
00:16:16,858 --> 00:16:20,726
Would you be kind enough to issue
one ticket, one-way to Diambodi?
267
00:16:20,795 --> 00:16:23,559
Diambodi? There isn't any Diambodi.
268
00:16:23,865 --> 00:16:27,392
Look, pal, I got no time
to play silly games. Look it up.
269
00:16:27,869 --> 00:16:31,464
Nope. Sorry, no Diambodi.
Maybe it's a gag.
270
00:16:32,807 --> 00:16:36,072
T.C., of course. That little sneak.
271
00:16:36,344 --> 00:16:40,041
Hold on, pal. You may still get a passenger
to Diambodi.
272
00:16:42,283 --> 00:16:45,377
Now that your leader has so brilliantly
removed old Jazz...
273
00:16:45,453 --> 00:16:48,820
I suggest we turn on the ball game
to see who won the pool.
274
00:16:50,358 --> 00:16:52,622
What a ball game. It's the last of the ninth.
275
00:16:52,694 --> 00:16:56,255
The Giants at bat,
trailing four to nothing. Bases loaded.
276
00:16:56,331 --> 00:17:00,529
Two out, count is two and three
and here comes the pitch.
277
00:17:02,270 --> 00:17:06,206
We interrupt this program.
Diamonds, I said, diamonds...
278
00:17:06,274 --> 00:17:10,074
have just been discovered in the hitherto
unknown village of Diambodi.
279
00:17:10,145 --> 00:17:13,876
In order to avoid a land rush,
we urge all citizens to stay away.
280
00:17:13,948 --> 00:17:16,473
This announcement came to you
as a public service.
281
00:17:16,551 --> 00:17:19,543
How do you like that.
I thought Diambodi was a phony place.
282
00:17:19,621 --> 00:17:22,454
Now Jazz is on his way there
to get all those diamonds.
283
00:17:22,524 --> 00:17:24,048
Boy, what luck.
284
00:17:24,292 --> 00:17:27,159
It worked. It worked like a charm.
Listen to him.
285
00:17:27,228 --> 00:17:29,196
All right, guys. We gotta move fast.
286
00:17:29,264 --> 00:17:31,528
Benny, Choo Choo,
get me some mosquito nets.
287
00:17:31,599 --> 00:17:34,295
Spook, Fancy, check the airport. Brain--
288
00:17:34,369 --> 00:17:37,964
-I know. Pack you bags.
-Glad you were paying attention.
289
00:17:38,039 --> 00:17:39,700
Blur, boys, blur.
290
00:17:40,441 --> 00:17:43,774
In a fast jet, I might beat old Jazz
to Diambodi yet.
291
00:17:48,316 --> 00:17:51,376
Quick. Give me one ticket,
one way to Diambodi.
292
00:17:51,452 --> 00:17:54,717
What's got into everybody?
There is no such place.
293
00:17:54,789 --> 00:17:59,249
Of course, sir, I understand. We mustn't
let it get too crowded over there.
294
00:17:59,327 --> 00:18:02,125
That's okay.
I'm one of the guys that got the tip.
295
00:18:02,197 --> 00:18:03,960
This has got to be a joke.
296
00:18:04,032 --> 00:18:07,900
I get it. You airline people want to keep
all the diamonds to yourselves.
297
00:18:07,969 --> 00:18:11,530
Well, I'll just see the president
of this chicken outfit.
298
00:18:11,639 --> 00:18:15,405
Oh, dear. I do wish
someone would let me in on the gag.
299
00:18:15,476 --> 00:18:17,706
I never get any laughs around here.
300
00:18:19,113 --> 00:18:23,277
"J.C. Crowflies, President."
Yeah, that's the guy I want to talk to.
301
00:18:24,052 --> 00:18:28,489
It took me all morning to build this thing.
It ought to really fly.
302
00:18:31,192 --> 00:18:33,387
Boy, look at that plane bank.
303
00:18:35,597 --> 00:18:39,055
-Yes?
-A Mr. T.C. to see you, sir.
304
00:18:39,133 --> 00:18:42,500
T.C.? Sounds important. Send him in.
305
00:18:43,771 --> 00:18:48,140
I'd better get rid of this paper airplane.
He might think I'm some kind of a nut.
306
00:18:50,111 --> 00:18:52,102
I won't beat about the bush, sir.
307
00:18:52,180 --> 00:18:55,411
I'm here to talk about
the Diambodi situation.
308
00:18:55,483 --> 00:18:56,575
The what?
309
00:18:56,651 --> 00:19:00,485
Now, no need to be coy, J.C.
I know all about it.
310
00:19:00,722 --> 00:19:04,818
Your secret is safe with me, boy.
For a consideration, of course.
311
00:19:05,093 --> 00:19:08,028
And I was worried
he might think I was a nut.
312
00:19:08,596 --> 00:19:10,826
Send in a policeman.
313
00:19:10,899 --> 00:19:14,266
Shrewd. Very shrewd indeed, J.C.
314
00:19:15,570 --> 00:19:16,798
Top Cat.
315
00:19:17,005 --> 00:19:20,532
I should have known you'd be mixed up
in any trouble on my beat.
316
00:19:20,608 --> 00:19:25,102
Officer Dribble, I mean, Dibble.
Just the hardy, protective type I like.
317
00:19:25,179 --> 00:19:27,579
Officer, throw that nut out.
318
00:19:27,715 --> 00:19:30,309
It's a pleasure, Mr. Crowflies.
319
00:19:30,385 --> 00:19:33,650
Wait! What about our diamonds
in Diambodi, J.C.?
320
00:19:37,325 --> 00:19:39,759
There are no diamonds in Diambodi.
321
00:19:39,827 --> 00:19:42,489
In fact, there isn't even a Diambodi.
322
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:45,562
No diamonds? No Diambodi? I don't get it.
323
00:19:47,435 --> 00:19:51,269
If I catch you pulling any more
of your schemes on my beat...
324
00:19:51,339 --> 00:19:53,739
I'll lock you up for a month of Sundays.
325
00:19:53,808 --> 00:19:57,835
Why can't you follow the example
of that nice guy Jazz?
326
00:19:57,946 --> 00:20:00,107
Jazz? Of course. Now I get it.
327
00:20:00,181 --> 00:20:04,015
You don't have to be a college professor
to figure out he was behind this.
328
00:20:05,853 --> 00:20:09,311
I am afraid, Bruno,
that I must insist on stark realism...
329
00:20:09,390 --> 00:20:12,018
for this new picture,
The Thing from the Alley.
330
00:20:12,093 --> 00:20:15,756
Somewhere in these alleys is our star.
We must not give up.
331
00:20:15,830 --> 00:20:18,230
You're absolutely and positively right, sir.
332
00:20:18,299 --> 00:20:20,893
Always remember my famous saying.
333
00:20:20,969 --> 00:20:24,496
"For realistic realism,
always use the real thing."
334
00:20:24,672 --> 00:20:27,698
Besides, it's cheaper than hiring
professional actors.
335
00:20:27,775 --> 00:20:30,938
-You're absolutely, positively right, sir.
-Bruno, look.
336
00:20:31,045 --> 00:20:34,173
Over there. It's him.
The new star for my film.
337
00:20:34,248 --> 00:20:37,046
The perfect thing from the alley.
You have the contract?
338
00:20:37,118 --> 00:20:41,145
-Absolutely and positively right here, sir.
-Good. Let's sign him up.
339
00:20:41,222 --> 00:20:44,419
Pardon me, sir. But I have
some wonderful, exciting news for you.
340
00:20:44,492 --> 00:20:47,950
Now don't faint. But you are going
to star in my next movie.
341
00:20:48,029 --> 00:20:50,497
Naturally. We'll do the whole bit, right?
342
00:20:50,565 --> 00:20:54,467
Hollywood, sport cars, premieres,
autographs, the whole schmeer, right?
343
00:20:54,535 --> 00:20:56,059
That's a great routine you got, Mac.
344
00:20:56,137 --> 00:20:59,436
But you better go tell T.C.
that I'm onto this routine.
345
00:20:59,507 --> 00:21:02,965
In fact, I'm surprised
he pulled such amateurish tactics.
346
00:21:03,044 --> 00:21:06,639
If you two phony baloneys don't mind,
I'd like to be alone, you know.
347
00:21:06,714 --> 00:21:09,774
And if you cats don't dig
that jive on me, like scram, beat it.
348
00:21:09,851 --> 00:21:11,113
Vamoose.
349
00:21:11,185 --> 00:21:15,144
-What is he talking about, Bruno?
-Looks like he turned you down, sir.
350
00:21:15,223 --> 00:21:17,885
Nonsense. No one turns me down!
351
00:21:18,259 --> 00:21:20,250
He just wasn't right for the part.
352
00:21:20,328 --> 00:21:22,694
You're absolutely and positively right, sir.
353
00:21:22,764 --> 00:21:25,790
-He wasn't right for the part.
-That's what I like about you.
354
00:21:25,867 --> 00:21:29,098
You have your own opinions.
I can't stand the yes man.
355
00:21:29,170 --> 00:21:31,263
Yes, sir. I mean, thank you, sir.
356
00:21:31,873 --> 00:21:33,170
Over there.
357
00:21:33,241 --> 00:21:37,200
There is the one for my picture.
The magnificent thing from the alley.
358
00:21:37,278 --> 00:21:40,042
All right, you!
You will be my new discovery.
359
00:21:40,114 --> 00:21:42,810
You will be a famous star.
Hurry and get packed.
360
00:21:42,884 --> 00:21:46,149
-We leave for Hollywood immediately.
-Great performance, pal.
361
00:21:46,220 --> 00:21:49,189
Beautiful. But I know Jazz hired you guys.
362
00:21:49,257 --> 00:21:51,691
Save the hysterics
for some more gullible guys...
363
00:21:51,759 --> 00:21:54,057
'cause you ain't fooling me, Charlie.
364
00:21:54,128 --> 00:21:55,618
What do you think?
365
00:21:56,931 --> 00:22:00,423
-He's not right for the part, either?
-That's how I feel, too.
366
00:22:00,501 --> 00:22:02,935
We must continue with the search.
367
00:22:03,004 --> 00:22:07,703
Somewhere, someplace, we will find
the thing from the alley.
368
00:22:07,775 --> 00:22:09,868
So long, fellows. Nice try.
369
00:22:10,578 --> 00:22:13,979
Those guys ought to be in movies.
What a performance.
370
00:22:14,048 --> 00:22:17,484
Boy, Jazz is really scraping the bottom
of the gimmick barrel.
371
00:22:17,552 --> 00:22:19,747
It's the oldest routine in the world.
372
00:22:20,555 --> 00:22:24,218
Why the chuckles, laughing boy?
Let me in on the gag.
373
00:22:24,692 --> 00:22:28,219
As I am amused by
that cornball movie routine...
374
00:22:28,296 --> 00:22:30,662
it cracks me, Jazz. What a laugh!
375
00:22:30,731 --> 00:22:34,030
Don't give me that.
I knew all along you hired those guys.
376
00:22:34,102 --> 00:22:36,229
What are you talking about?
I didn't hire them.
377
00:22:36,304 --> 00:22:39,637
-You're a riot, T.C., a regular riot.
-I say you hired them.
378
00:22:39,707 --> 00:22:41,368
-You did.
-I did not. You did.
379
00:22:41,442 --> 00:22:44,570
-No, I didn't. You did.
-I did not. It was you.
380
00:22:44,645 --> 00:22:46,772
-Hiya, fellows!
-Benny.
381
00:22:46,848 --> 00:22:51,046
I just came to say goodbye.
I'm leaving for a few weeks.
382
00:22:51,486 --> 00:22:54,546
Where are you going?
What are you doing in that kookie outfit?
383
00:22:54,622 --> 00:22:57,523
I'm going to Hollywood.
Some guy picked me out.
384
00:22:57,592 --> 00:23:00,322
He said I was the perfect
thing from the alley.
385
00:23:00,394 --> 00:23:02,726
He's gonna put me in a movie.
386
00:23:04,098 --> 00:23:07,727
-Those guys were for real.
-And we wouldn't believe them.
387
00:23:07,802 --> 00:23:11,431
Let's go, Mr. Benny.
We must catch a plane to Hollywood.
388
00:23:11,539 --> 00:23:14,940
So long, you guys.
See you at the premiere.
389
00:23:16,344 --> 00:23:21,008
Just one moment, sir, I'm afraid I must go
along to look after my client's interests.
390
00:23:21,716 --> 00:23:24,014
-Your client?
-But of course, sir.
391
00:23:24,085 --> 00:23:27,919
As Mr. Benny's personal manager,
I must insist he be accompanied...
392
00:23:27,989 --> 00:23:31,481
-with his normal retinue.
-Retinue? What retinue?
393
00:23:31,559 --> 00:23:34,619
I'll show you, chum. One valet, coming up.
394
00:23:35,029 --> 00:23:38,624
A chauffeur, a tailor, and a vocal coach.
395
00:23:38,799 --> 00:23:41,893
All present? Good.
Gentlemen, we are going to Hollywood.
396
00:23:41,969 --> 00:23:44,904
Into the cab, quick.
We got a plane to catch.
397
00:23:46,574 --> 00:23:50,533
So long, Jazz. If you don't get a letter,
you'll know we didn't write.
398
00:23:50,611 --> 00:23:53,136
To the airport, driver. And move it.
399
00:23:54,015 --> 00:23:58,748
Why should I complain? I mean,
with them gone, the alley is all mine.
400
00:24:01,055 --> 00:24:04,718
Hello, operator. Would you get that
Sergeant What's-His-Name off the line?
401
00:24:04,792 --> 00:24:06,555
I'm trying to call Syracuse.
402
00:24:06,627 --> 00:24:10,358
So, you're just as bad as Top Cat?
403
00:24:10,431 --> 00:24:13,423
Please, sir, will you hold it down?
This is an important call.
404
00:24:13,501 --> 00:24:17,733
Yeah? Don't you know
that using a police phone is a felony...
405
00:24:17,805 --> 00:24:20,103
punishable by a 505?
406
00:24:20,241 --> 00:24:22,471
A 505? What does that mean?
407
00:24:22,543 --> 00:24:26,502
It means you keep this alley
clean as a whistle for 30 days...
408
00:24:26,581 --> 00:24:29,641
or I'll run you in for littering.
Now get busy.
409
00:24:31,219 --> 00:24:34,211
Jazz, you didn't tell me about this.
410
00:24:34,889 --> 00:24:37,050
What are you complaining about?
411
00:24:37,124 --> 00:24:39,684
I told you we'd clean up in this town,
didn't I?
412
00:24:39,760 --> 00:24:41,625
And now we got 30 days to do it.
413
00:24:41,696 --> 00:24:44,665
-Faster, you guys.
-Yes, sir.
414
00:24:46,334 --> 00:24:47,824
Oh, boy. Yes, sir.
35438
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