Original subtitles

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

AH HA HA HA!

AH.

A CORPSE BY ANY OTHER NAME WOULD SMELL AS SWEET.

UNLESS, OF COURSE, IT ISN'T DEAD YET.

TONIGHT'S TAWDRY TALE

IS ABOUT A MAN WHO'S GRAVELY CONCERNED

ABOUT MATTERS OF LIFE AND DEATH.

WHY HE'D CARE ABOUT THAT REMAINS TO BE SEEN.

I CALL THIS PUTRID PIECE

ABRA CADAVER.

YOU GOT YOUR HEAD UP YOUR ASS, CARL.

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

CLINICAL DEATH IS HEART DEATH.

I'M TALKING ABOUT BRAIN DEATH.

I UNDERSTAND. REALLY.

DON'T PATRONIZE ME, LITTLE BROTHER.

I KNOW YOU BETTER THAN THAT.

I'M NOT PATRONIZING YOU, MARTIN.

I'M SIMPLY DISAGREEING. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.

YOUR IDEA IS COMPLETELY UNTENABLE.

TAKE OXYGEN AWAY FROM SOMEONE'S BRAIN,

AND ALL YOU HAVE LEFT

IS A COUPLE POUNDS OF ORGAN MEAT.

THEY CAN'T HEAR, THEY CAN'T FEEL,

THEY CAN'T SEE.

YOU'RE AS NARROW-MINDED AS EVERYONE ELSE.

OH, THAT'S THE POT CALLING THE KETTLE BLACK.

I DON'T HAVE TO HELP YOU, YOU KNOW.

NOBODY HELPED ME GET THROUGH MEDICAL SCHOOL.

THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE A FUCKING GENIUS.

IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.

BECOMING A SURGEON IS ABOUT HARD WORK.

YOU HAVE TO MAKE SACRIFICES IF YOU'RE GOING TO SUCCEED.

AND BECOME A MISERABLE AND UPTIGHT ASSHOLE

LIKE YOU?

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO IF YOU HAVE YOUR OWN PRACTICE?

ARE YOU GOING TO CALL ME IN THE MIDDLE OF SURGERY

BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO?

YOU WOULDN'T NEED MY HELP. I WOULDN'T HAVE TO BE HERE

IF YOU TOOK YOUR WORK A LITTLE MORE SERIOUSLY.

I NEED YOU HERE, MARTY, TO HOLD MY DICK FOR ME

WHEN I HAVE TO TAKE A LEAK.

THAT'S REAL NICE, CARL, REAL NICE.

THERE'S A MILD ANOMALY IN THE ARTERY SYSTEM HERE.

WHAT IS IT? WHAT ARE THE IMPLICATIONS?

WELL, SEE...

THE LEFT MAIN... NO. WAIT A MINUTE.

YOU'RE LOOKING AT THE CRUX, RIGHT?

YOU ARE IN TROUBLE.

COME ON, USE YOUR DAMN EYES.

CARL, THE RIGHT CORONARY ARTERY

USUALLY CROSSES THE CRUX, RIGHT?

ALL RIGHT, WELL, WHAT DOES THAT TELL YOU

ABOUT THIS GUY'S PROBLEM?

WAIT A MINUTE.

THE CIRC'S SUPPOSED TO FEED THE A.V. NODE.

DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING AT?

COME ON, HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET THROUGH 2 YEARS?

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!

SHIT.

I'M WEAK ON CIRC. WE'LL COME BACK TO IT.

LET'S LOOK AT SOMETHING ELSE.

"WE'LL COME BACK TO IT"?

IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO SAY WHEN YOU TAKE

YOUR PRACTICALS NEXT WEEK?

OH, GROSS.

NEXT.

YOU GOT TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR ATTITUDE, CARL.

WOW. FRESH MEAT.

HEY, YOU THINK SHE CAN HEAR US?

OHH.

I'M ASKING. I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.

WOW, HONEY, I'D TURN NECRO FOR YOU IN A SECOND.

YOU'RE DISGUSTING.

DO YOU THINK SHE CAN HEAR US?

THINK SHE'S REALLY ALIVE?

GOD, BABY, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.

STOP THAT.

SHE'S DEAD, MARTIN.

SHE'S COLD AS FUCKING ICE.

SHE WOULDN'T KNOW IT IF WE WENT HIP-TO-HIP TILL SUNRISE.

YEAH? THEN HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THOSE KIDS

THEY PULL FROM THE ICE

CLINICALLY DEAD AFTER AN HOUR,

YET THEY WAKE UP AS IF NOTHING EVER HAPPENED?

I DON'T KNOW, LUCK?

NO. THEIR BRAINS NEVER DIED.

THAT'S THE POINT.

CAN SHE FEEL ANYMORE?

CAN SHE?

WHOA.

WHAT?

I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

FEELS LIKE HER SKIN RESPONDED.

HUH?

HOLY SHIT. LOOK.

HER NIPPLE GOT HARD.

SHIT.

AAH! AAH!

DON'T TOUCH ME!

GOD!

DON'T TOUCH ME!

NO!

DON'T TOUCH ME!

AAH!

HA HA HA HA!

HA HA HA HA!

HA HA HA HA!

SURPRISE!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MARTY.

WAS THAT NOT THE BEST JOKE YOU EVER SEEN IN YOUR LIFE?

OH, GOD.

IT WAS... A JOKE?

IT WAS, INDEED.

THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND PAULA.

HI, MARTY. IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.

I THOUGHT YOU FORGOT.

MARTY...

I MAY BE A SELFISH PRICK, BUT I'M NOT THAT SELFISH.

HEY, MARTY.

BILLY?

IS... IS THAT YOU?

DON'T JUST STAND THERE GAWKING.

JOIN THE PARTY.

HA HA!

HA HA HA HA!

AAH!

MARTY, WHAT'S WRONG?

MY HEART!

UNH.

SOMEBODY CALL A GODDAMNED AMBULANCE NOW!

CARL!

CARL.

IT WAS JUST A JOKE, MARTY.

MARTY.

MARTY!

Woman on P.A.: DR. KELLER TO THE BLOOD BANK.

RESIDENT ON DUTY, REPORT TO NEUROLOGY.

DR. BAILEY SENT THIS DOWN FOR YOU, DR. FAIRBANKS.

HE WANTS AN ANSWER ON IT STAT.

BAILEY WANTS EVERYTHING STAT.

CAN I TALK TO YOU, DR. FAIRBANKS?

I WANT TO KNOW WHY YOU'RE AVOIDING ME, CARL.

I'M NOT AVOIDING YOU.

WE'RE TALKING RIGHT NOW, AREN'T WE?

THIS IS TALKING?

WHILE YOU LOOK THROUGH YOUR MAIL?

LOOK, I JUST WANT TO KNOW IF IT'S OVER.

IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO TELL ME?

KELLY, DON'T GO READING

DIRE MESSAGES INTO EVERYTHING.

SOMETIMES A BANANA IS JUST A BANANA, OK?

THEN WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU LAST NIGHT?

SON OF A BITCH!

I WANT TO KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS.

GOOD MORNING, CARL.

I CALLED IN EVERY FAVOR I HAD

TO GET YOU THAT TEACHING POSITION, MARTIN.

WHY AREN'T YOU TAKING IT?

I'M FINE, THANK YOU. HOW ARE YOU?

YOU DIDN'T EVEN HAVE THE DECENCY TO TELL ME ABOUT IT.

I FIND OUT BY GETTING A PHOTOCOPY

OF YOUR LETTER TO THE FACULTY COMMITTEE.

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THAT MAKES ME LOOK LIKE?

AN ASSHOLE?

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

I'M THROUGH DISCUSSING THIS WITH YOU, MARTIN.

I'M CALLING THE COMMITTEE IN THE MORNING,

AND I'M TELLING THEM YOU'RE TAKING THE JOB.

I DON'T HAVE TIME TO TEACH.

YOU'VE GOT NOTHING BUT TIME, MY FRIEND.

WE MADE A DEAL...

EITHER YOU SHOWED ME RESULTS,

OR I CUT OFF YOUR FUNDING.

YOU'VE SHOWN ME NOTHING, SO I SAID, FINE,

I'LL GET YOU A TEACHING POSITION.

YOU CAN WASTE YOUR OWN MONEY FOR A CHANGE.

IT'S A SHAME, CARL.

I DON'T GET A CHANCE SEE YOU ANYMORE,

ONLY YOUR MONEY.

I'M WARNING YOU, MARTIN.

TAKE THE JOB,

OR I CUT YOU OFF COMPLETELY.

CAN I GET YOU A DRINK?

HEH.

YOU THINK I'M JOKING, DON'T YOU?

I'M TOTALLY SERIOUS, MARTIN.

I'VE TRIED TO HELP YOU.

NOW I'M PERFECTLY PREPARED TO CUT YOU OFF.

JUST GIVE ME YOUR ANSWER.

COME ON, HAVE A DRINK WITH ME.

COME ON.

BE A BROTHER FOR A CHANGE,

NOT A BENEFACTOR.

YOU'LL NEVER FORGIVE ME, WILL YOU?

I'LL TRY, LITTLE BROTHER.

MMM...

REMEMBER THAT TRIP I TOOK TO HAITI?

I PAID FOR IT, DIDN'T I?

YES, YOU DID.

HA HA HA!

YES, YOU DID.

WHAT THE HELL IS ALL THIS SHIT?

IS THIS WHERE MY MONEY'S BEEN GOING?

IN HAITI,

THERE'S A RITUAL CALLED LES MORTS VIVANTES.

MARTY, YOU TOLD ME

I WAS SUPPORTING ENDORPHIN RESEARCH,

NOT FUCKING VOODOO.

VOODOO IS A FORM OF FOLK MEDICINE, CARL.

THEY'VE DISCOVERED THINGS THAT'LL BLOW YOUR MIND.

LIKE WHAT, LIKE HANGING DEAD CHICKENS FROM THE CEILING?

NO, LISTEN TO ME, CARL. I SAW THIS CEREMONY...

LES MORTS VIVANTES, THE LIVING DEAD.

I SAW DEAD PEOPLE RISING FROM THEIR GRAVES.

IS THAT WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT?

GOD DAMN IT, MARTY!

WE HAD AN UNDERSTANDING. I TOLD YOU

I WOULDN'T PAY FOR ANY OF THAT BULLSHIT.

NO, IT'S NOT BULLSHIT, CARL.

I FOUND WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR.

I CAN NOW SHOW QUANTITATIVELY THAT,

IN CERTAIN INSTANCES, THE BRAIN REMAINS VIABLE

LONG AFTER CLINICAL DEATH.

THIS SUBJECT HERE DIED 3 DAYS AGO.

3 DAYS!

AND I'M STILL GETTING

ALL KINDS OF WAVE ACTIVITY.

ARE YOU LISTENING TO YOURSELF?

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU SOUND LIKE?

THIS WOMAN HERE DIED ONE WEEK AGO.

YOU'RE RUNNING A GODDAMN FREAK SHOW HERE.

THIS IS IT, MARTIN.

IT'S OVER.

AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED,

I'VE PAID MY DEBT TO YOU.

HAVE A NICE LIFE.

YOU HAVE A NICE DEATH.

WHAT'S IT FEEL LIKE, CARL...

WHEN YOUR HEART SEIZES ON YOU?

HELP ME!

YOU KNOW, WATCHING YOU LIKE THIS

REALLY BRINGS BACK MEMORIES.

YOU REMEMBER THAT NIGHT, DON'T YOU?

I DO. I WAS ONE HELL OF A SURGEON

UNTIL YOUR LITTLE JOKE COST ME A CAREER.

A SURGEON NEEDS...

2 GOOD HANDS.

PERMANENT HEMIPARESIS...

THE ONLY BIRTHDAY GIFT YOU EVER GAVE ME.

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?

OH, WELL, I'VE KILLED YOU, HAVEN'T I?

BUT WHAT?

YOU'RE NOT DEAD... NOT OFFICIALLY YET.

I MEAN, YOU'RE STILL ALIVE, AREN'T YOU?

I'M SURPRISED YOU DIDN'T TASTE IT.

I'D HAVE THOUGHT THE HYPERBARIUM HYDROCHLORIDE

WOULD'VE CLASHED WITH THE SCOTCH.

IT'S TOO BAD THAT YOU CAN'T...

REPORT BACK WHAT YOU SEE, WHAT YOU FEEL.

YOU WOULD'VE BEEN SO HELPFUL IN MY RESEARCH.

UHH.

ALL RIGHT, DON'T WORRY. LET ME JUST...

UNBUTTON YOUR SLEEVE. TAKE IT EASY NOW.

NOW, DON'T MAKE THIS DIFFICULT.

NOW, IF I DON'T GIVE YOU THIS,

THEY MIGHT FIND TRACES OF POISON IN YOUR SYSTEM.

WE COULDN'T HAVE THAT, COULD WE?

SAY GOOD NIGHT, GRACIE.

OHH...

HOW DOES IT FEEL BEING DEAD?

I'M NOT DEAD.

I FEEL LIKE SHIT, BUT I'M NOT DEAD.

CARL, ARE YOU IN THERE?

I'M TALKING TO YOU, AREN'T I?

ANYBODY HOME?

DON'T GO AWAY.

OH, GIVE ME A BREAK, MARTY.

YOU'RE THE WORST ACTOR IN THE WORLD.

HELP ME UP, WILL YOU?

AH, RIGHT ABOUT NOW YOU SHOULD BE KICKING IN

WITH A GOOD, HEALTHY DOSE OF ENDORPHINS.

I'LL BET YOU'RE FEELING PRETTY GOOD.

AM I RIGHT? HMM?

YOU KNOW, THIS IS STARTING

TO WEAR REALLY THIN, MARTY.

I WANT YOU TO STOP IT.

LOOK, I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME,

BECAUSE I CAN HEAR ME. NOW CUT IT OUT.

HOW'S THE VIEW IN THERE, CARL?

I SWEAR TO GOD, MARTIN, IF YOU DON'T...

UNH! I CAN'T MOVE MY ARMS.

AM I PARALYZED?

I KNOW YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME, CARL,

BUT IF YOU'LL JUST BE PATIENT HERE ONE MOMENT,

I'M SURE...

THAT YOU'RE GOING TO BELIEVE THIS.

OH, NO! I CAN'T BE DEAD.

YOU'RE FLATLINE... CLINICALLY DEAD,

BUT YOU CAN STILL SEE,

YOU CAN STILL HEAR,

AND, UH...

AAH!

YOU CAN STILL FEEL.

SHIT. MY HEART...

BUT TAKE HEART, LITTLE BROTHER...

I CAN'T HEAR IT BEATING.

MY RESEARCH INDICATES

THAT TOUCH IS THE FIRST SENSE TO GO.

I HOPE IT'S TRUE,

BECAUSE THAT ORGAN DONOR TRUCK

IS GOING TO BE BY REAL SOON,

AND I DON'T THINK THAT'S GOING TO FEEL REAL GOOD.

HA HA HA. AND YOU THOUGHT I HAD NO SENSE OF HUMOR.

KIND OF PERFECT, DON'T YOU THINK?

I MEAN, HERE I AM LAUGHING MY ASS OFF,

AND THERE YOU ARE, DEADLY SERIOUS.

I'M DEAD.

I'M REALLY DEAD.

WHO'S FUCKED NOW, CARL?

MARTY, THIS IS CRAZY!

MARTY! OH, GOD, MY HEAD IS SPINNING.

SPINNING...

THIS IS WHAT DEATH IS LIKE.

OHH, WHERE AM I?

WHAT TIME IS IT?

WHAT DAY IS IT?

WHAT DO YOU WANT HERE, HUH?

HMM.

HEH HEH HEH.

THIS MAN OUR BOY, BOSSY?

MARTIN...

THIS IS HIM.

MMM. ME LIKE A MON FRESH, YOU KNOW?

MOST OF THE TIME,

THE BODIES YOU SEND UP HERE, DOC...

THEM ALREADY CHOPPED UP, MON.

OW! I GOT HIM CHEAP, TOO.

I'M NOT COMPLAINING, BOSS.

I MEAN, YOU KNOW, UP HERE, MON,

WE IS HAPPY TO OBTAIN CADAVER,

NO MATTER WHEN.

CADAVER?

WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON?

ME GO AND SIGN HIM IN NOW.

THIS ISN'T THE MORGUE. WHERE THE HELL ARE WE?

THIS MON A JOHN DOE?

JOHN DOE.

JOHN DOE.

SHIT, HE'S COVERING HIS TRACKS.

HE'S HIDING MY BODY WHERE NO ONE WILL EVER FIND ME.

MARTY, I'M YOUR BROTHER, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME?

DON'T PANIC. YOU'RE AT THE MEDICAL SCHOOL.

I WAS JOKING BEFORE ABOUT YOU BEING AN ORGAN DONOR.

THEY ASK TOO MANY QUESTIONS.

BESIDES, IT SEEMS RIGHT THAT YOU SHOULD WIND UP HERE

WHERE MY LIFE ENDED AND YOUR LIFE BEGAN.

YOU REMEMBER THIS ROOM, DON'T YOU?

YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY WITH IT.

THEY'LL CATCH YOU.

THEY'LL CATCH YOU AND FRY

YOUR FUCKING LITTLE BALLS OFF,

YOU SICK SON OF A BITCH!

AM I SENSING A LITTLE ANGER HERE?

HMM?

I DON'T DESERVE THIS.

I MAY HAVE HURT YOU, BUT THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT.

THIS IS MURDER!

MITCH.

YEAH. WHAT'S UP?

YOU WANT ANY HELP HANGING HIM UP?

YEAH.

OH, NO! NOT THE MEAT LOCKER!

OH, GOD!

LOOK AT THEM ALL HANGING HERE.

CAN THEY SENSE WHAT'S HAPPENING TO THEM?

YOU WANT TO HELP ME TO FLIP HIM OVER, DOC?

OH, MARTY, I GOT TO HAND IT TO YOU.

I'M REALLY IMPRESSED.

I NEVER THOUGHT YOU HAD IT IN YOU.

OH, DAMN! I FORGOT MY KNIFE.

IT'S OK, MITCH. I'VE GOT ONE.

OH, MY GOD!

I HAVE ONE.

HE'S GOING TO CUT ME.

AH, THE PRESSURE ON MY NECK.

OH, GOD! THIS IS... I CAN FEEL THE BLADE,

BUT IT DOESN'T HURT.

MARTIN WAS RIGHT ABOUT LOSING THE SENSE OF TOUCH.

I WONDER WHEN THE OTHER SENSES ARE GOING TO GO.

YOU WANT TO HELP ME HOIST HIM UP?

YOU SURE IT'S GOING TO HOLD?

IF IT DOESN'T, HE'LL NEVER KNOW.

NO. NO...

PLEASE DON'T HANG ME!

AAH! MARTY!

NO! PLEASE, GET ME DOWN!

PLEASE!

WE GOT IT. THANKS, DOC.

CATCH YOU LATER, MAN.

ALL RIGHT.

MARTY, DON'T GO.

YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME LIKE THIS.

I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE.

OH, GOD! THIS IS HELL!

CHRIST.

OH, BUT THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT IS.

I'VE DIED, AND HELL IS IN THE MEAT LOCKER

AT THE MEDICAL SCHOOL BASEMENT.

AAH!

SEE YOU TOMORROW, CARL.

GET ME DOWN, MARTIN.

PLEASE...

MARTIN!

SO, I GUESS YOU'LL JUST BE

HANGING AROUND TILL THEN.

HA HA.

MARTIN, NO!

WHAT'S HAPPENING?

THE HOOK... IT'S SLIPPING.

MY NECK.

AAH!

OH, I MUST'VE PASSED OUT.

SO PEACEFUL.

HUH? OH, GOD, NOT THIS ASSHOLE AGAIN.

THIS CAN'T BE HELL.

NOT EVEN HELL WOULD BE THIS BAD.

WHAT YOU DOING DOWN THERE, JOHNNY DOE, SIR?

YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR ACCOMODATIONS?

YOU WANT KEYS TO ANOTHER HOTEL AT THIS TIME?

TOO LATE, MON. CLUB DREAD FOR YOU.

COME ON. LET ME TALK TO YOU.

UHH...

OHH. HOW LONG IS THIS GOING TO LAST?

IT CAN'T BE LIKE THIS FOREVER.

MY BRAIN IS GOING TO HAVE TO DIE SOMETIME,

BUT WHEN?

YOU WANT TO TRY MITCHELL'S GANJA?

YEAH, MON.

ME TELL YOU, IT TAKE YOU TO ANOTHER PLANE.

WHAT AM I DOING? I CAN'T COUGH.

IT'S GOOD, RIGHT?

YUCK! OH, GOD!

WHO KNOWS WHERE THIS GUY'S MOUTH HAS BEEN.

ONE THING ABOUT MY GANJA I'LL TELL YOU.

IT WON'T GONNA KILL YOU.

JOHNNY DOE, YOU'RE A LAUGH RIOT.

DANGER, WILL ROBINSON.

DANGER. LOOK OUT, MON. DANGER.

HA HA HA.

COME ON, JOHNNY.

HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY! CAREFUL, SHITHEAD.

YOU'RE A BIG WHITE BOY.

HAVE A LITTLE RESPECT FOR THE DEAD, HUH?

BLOOD CLOT!

UHH!

OH, WHEN WILL ALL THIS STOP?

WHEN WILL I HAVE PEACE?

OHH. WHEREVER I AM IS...

SHH. TIME FOR PREPARATION.

SHOWTIME, JOHNNY DOE.

I'M ON AN EMBALMING TABLE.

HE'S GOING TO DRAIN ME.

♪ IN THIS HERE SOCIETY ♪

HE'S GOING TO SLIT MY THROAT!

OH, GOD, NO, DON'T DO IT.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.

UHH. UNH!

STRAIGHT IN THERE, MON, JUST LIKE JAH PROMISE.

OH, THERE WAS NO PAIN. I DIDN'T FEEL ANYTHING.

TOUCH IS COMPLETELY GONE.

OH, AND THOSE TUBES TO PUMP OUT MY BLOOD.

STICK IN THE JUGULAR SYSTEM.

NOW IT'S TIME...

HERE WE ARE. PUMP THIS...

ANY LOOSE ENDS?

SOMEONE'S GOING TO GIVE A SHIT THAT I'M NOT AROUND.

THERE GOES MY BLOOD...

DISAPPEARING.

OH, IT'S A FUNNY FEELING,

AND THE LIGHT-HEADEDNESS, IT'S LIKE...

MAYBE THIS IS THE END.

A NUMBNESS CREEPING OVER ME TO MY TOES.

IT MUST BE THE BLOOD DRAINING OUT OF ME.

GOOD MORNING, LITTLE BROTHER.

STILL WITH US?

I WANT YOU TO KNOW

HOW GLAD I AM YOU COULD JOIN ME

FOR MY FIRST CLASS.

OH, I FORGOT TO TELL YOU.

I CHANGED MY MIND ABOUT YOUR OFFER.

I DECIDED YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT THE MONEY AND EVERYTHING.

I TOOK THE TEACHING JOB.

OH, SCHOOL'S IN.

MARTY, DON'T GO! YOU WERE RIGHT!

MY BODY'S DEAD, BUT MY BRAIN, IT'S ALIVE!

I'M DR. FAIRBANKS.

HELLO.

I'LL BE CONDUCTING TODAY'S CLASS

IN CRANIAL ANATOMY.

YES, SIR. SO...

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO,

I'LL BEGIN BY DRAWING THE INCISION LINE.

THAT'S FINE, MARTY. GET IT OVER WITH.

THE SOONER YOU CUT OUT MY BRAIN,

THE SOONER THIS WILL ALL BE OVER.

I SWEAR I COULD JUST FEEL MY FINGERS...

PINS AND NEEDLES.

THE NUMBNESS ISN'T SETTLING IN.

IT'S WEARING OFF.

THE EPIDERMAL SAW...

IT CUTS BOTH SKIN AND BONE.

YOU CAN'T IMAGINE WHAT A TERRIBLE MESS

THE OLD STRYKER SAWS USED TO MAKE.

NO! NO, WAIT!

MISS JOHNSON, WOULD YOU PLEASE

PEEL BACK THE SKIN WHILE I CUT?

MARTIN, DON'T!

OH, GOD!

I'M BEING PEELED!

THEY'RE TEARING MY SKULL APART!

NO! NO, MARTY, WAIT!

I... I'M ALIVE!

I CAN FEEL!

I CAN FEEL MY FINGERS AND MY TOES!

I'M ALIVE!

MY HAND! LOOK AT MY HAND!

HEH HEH.

OH, I GUESS OUR SUBJECT

WAS A LITTLE HARD HEADED.

THERE WE GO.

NOW...

NOW...

MARTY, STOP BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.

MARTY, PLEASE.

I CAN FEEL IT!

STOP, MARTIN, STOP!

I'M ALIVE!

AAH!

I'M ALIVE!

AAH!

HA HA! WHOA!

AAH! AAH!

WELCOME BACK TO THE WORLD

OF THE LIVING, LITTLE BROTHER.

WHAT?

I'M ALIVE?

OH, VERY MUCH ALIVE.

OH, YOU HAD A HEART ATTACK, ALL RIGHT.

YOU WERE CLINICALLY DEAD.

THE STUFF I PUT INTO YOUR DRINK INDUCED IT,

BUT YOU WERE NEVER IN DANGER.

OH, MY GOD.

HUH? HOW ABOUT THIS?

Woman: PRETTY FUNNY.

THIS IS WHAT I INJECTED INTO YOU.

IT'S WHAT I WAS WORKING ON,

WHAT YOU WERE PAYING FOR.

I CALL IT SUSPENSOR.

IN THE EVENT OF CATASTROPHIC INJURY

OR HEART FAILURE,

IT PRESERVES BRAIN FUNCTION,

JUST LIKE IT PRESERVED YOURS.

IN THE COURSE OF A FEW HOURS...

FFT! IT WEARS OFF.

A FEW HOURS?

IT FELT LIKE DAYS.

NAH, JUST HOURS.

A LITTLE UNDER 3, TO BE EXACT.

WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?

WE'RE DR. FAIRBANKS' RESEARCH STAFF.

YOU'D HAVE KNOWN THAT IF YOU'D HAVE STOPPED BY.

OH, HEY, SORRY ABOUT THAT DAMN MEAT HOOK.

HA HA HA!

SHOW HIM THE HARNESS.

WE RIGGED THIS THING UP FOR YOU.

IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BREAK.

SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK? HUH?

ARE YOU IMPRESSED?

HAVE I WON OVER MY TOUGHEST CRITIC? HUH?

YEAH... YOU HAVE.

HA HA HA!

I'M PROUD OF YOU, MARTIN.

HE'S PROUD...

OH...

GOOD ACTING, CARL.

CARL, WHAT'S WRONG?

OH, SHIT, CARL.

ALL RIGHT, WHAT'S WRONG NOW?

HE'S HAVING ANOTHER HEART ATTACK.

HOLD IT. HOLD IT.

JOHNSON, GET ME THE HYPODERMIC.

MOVE! SHIT, CARL! YES, SIR!

CARL, IT WAS ONLY A JOKE!

HE'S IN ARREST!

COME ON, MOVE.

GET OVER HERE. GET OVER HERE!

RIGHT.

FIVE TO ONE. FIVE TO ONE. LET'S DO IT FIVE TO ONE.

ON MY COUNT.

HOLD ON, CARL.

ONE...

DON'T LEAVE ME. DON'T LEAVE ME, CARL.

FIVE.

ONE.

PAY ATTENTION! COME ON.

IT WAS ONLY A JOKE.

FOUR, FIVE.

ONE, TWO. COME ON!

THREE, FOUR.

TRY AGAIN.

HAVE YOU GOT ANYTHING? HAVE YOU GOT ANYTHING?

WHAT AN AWFUL STORY.

THE GUY'S OWN BROTHER KILLED HIM.

WELL, IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.

HE WAS WORKING WITH THIS EXPERIMENTAL DRUG.

HE DIDN'T HAVE ANY IDEA

IT WOULD ACTUALLY CAUSE A HEART ATTACK.

SHAME.

DAMN SHAME.

HEY, HAND ME THAT EPIDERMAL SAW, WILL YOU?

YEAH, SURE.

AH, HERE IT IS AT LAST... MY AUTOPSY.

GOD DAMN YOU, MARTY. YOU WERE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT,

EXCEPT ABOUT ONE THING...

THE SENSE OF TOUCH ISN'T THE FIRST THING TO GO,

IT'S THE LAST!

AAH!

TSK, TSK, TSK.

AND CARL THOUGHT

HE WAS THE FAMILY'S PRACTICAL CHOKER.

WANT TO PLAY DOCTOR?

THEN OPEN WIDE AND SAY,

"AAH!"

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE... www.ncicap.org...