All language subtitles for Tales From The Crypt (1989) S02E10

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,338 --> 00:00:07,572 GOOD EVENING, FEAR FANS. 2 00:00:07,641 --> 00:00:10,074 YOU'RE JUST IN TIME. 3 00:00:10,143 --> 00:00:13,445 ONE VENTRILOQUIST'S DUMMY. 4 00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:16,915 HACME NOVELTY COMPANY, BATTLE SHRIEK, MICHIGAN. 5 00:00:16,983 --> 00:00:19,518 OH, GOODY! 6 00:00:19,587 --> 00:00:21,453 WATCH THIS, KIDDIES. 7 00:00:21,522 --> 00:00:23,922 YOU WON'T SEE MY LIPS MOVE. 8 00:00:23,990 --> 00:00:25,390 YOU KNOW WHY? 9 00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:28,627 I DON'T HAVE ANY! 10 00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:30,929 WELL, HELLO, DICKY. 11 00:00:30,997 --> 00:00:34,043 WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO TELL A TALE FROM THE CRYPT? 12 00:00:34,067 --> 00:00:37,252 NO, THANKS, DEATH BREATH. 13 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:40,956 THEN HOW ABOUT SITTING A LITTLE CLOSER TO THE FIRE? 14 00:00:42,192 --> 00:00:44,292 THAT'S BETTER. 15 00:00:44,361 --> 00:00:47,562 NOW I CAN DOLE OUT A DISEASED LITTLE DITTY 16 00:00:47,631 --> 00:00:51,133 ABOUT THE SCHIZOFRANTIC NATURE OF SHOW BIZ 17 00:00:51,201 --> 00:00:54,218 AND HOW TO HACK YOUR WAY TO THE TOP. 18 00:00:54,287 --> 00:00:57,155 SO GRAB HOLD OF YOUR GUTS, KIDDIES, 19 00:00:57,223 --> 00:00:59,324 'CAUSE TONIGHT YOU GET TO RUB ELBOWS 20 00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:02,361 WITH THE VENTRILOQUIST'S DUMMY. 21 00:01:05,566 --> 00:01:08,900 SO YOU'RE GOING TO AFRICA ON SAFARI, HUH? 22 00:01:08,969 --> 00:01:11,770 ARE YOU CRAZY? THAT'S VERY DANGEROUS. 23 00:01:11,838 --> 00:01:14,673 YOU COULD RUN ACROSS A VERY ANGRY LION. 24 00:01:14,742 --> 00:01:16,308 I'LL HAVE MY GUN WITH ME. 25 00:01:16,377 --> 00:01:17,643 DOES IT SHOOT LIONS? 26 00:01:17,711 --> 00:01:19,822 NO, STUPID. IT SHOOTS BULLETS. 27 00:01:19,846 --> 00:01:21,563 LIONS ARE TOO BIG TO LOAD. 28 00:01:21,632 --> 00:01:23,543 HOW ABOUT A NICE POP IN THE MOUTH? 29 00:01:23,567 --> 00:01:25,345 WHAT, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 30 00:01:25,369 --> 00:01:28,114 LISTEN, MAYBE YOU OUGHT TO SKIP GOING TO AFRICA. 31 00:01:28,138 --> 00:01:30,472 STAY HOME AND GO HUNTING HERE... 32 00:01:30,541 --> 00:01:32,274 DUCKS, GEESE. 33 00:01:32,343 --> 00:01:34,576 BUT I CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DUCKS AND GEESE. 34 00:01:34,645 --> 00:01:35,577 IT'S VERY EASY. 35 00:01:35,646 --> 00:01:39,448 DUCKS GO "QUACK QUACK." UNDERSTAND? 36 00:01:39,516 --> 00:01:41,483 AND GEESE GO "HONK HONK." 37 00:01:41,552 --> 00:01:43,785 IF A PACK OF BIRDS FLY OVER 38 00:01:43,854 --> 00:01:46,232 AND THEY GO "HONK HONK," WHAT DO YOU DO? 39 00:01:46,256 --> 00:01:48,589 PULL OVER AND LET THEM PASS. 40 00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:52,305 WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU APPLAUDING ABOUT? 41 00:01:52,329 --> 00:01:53,712 WHAT ARE YOU? SEALS? 42 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:54,858 THAT'S ONE OF MY BIG ONES. 43 00:01:54,882 --> 00:01:57,382 AND THE FAT GUY BETTER LAUGH. 44 00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:59,762 I SEE YOU, THE FAT GUY, AND I'M GONNA PUT STRIPES ON YOUR FACE 45 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:03,055 AND ROLL YOU DOWN THE BEACH FOR A HALF HOUR. 46 00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:04,734 VERY SERIOUSLY, I'M LOOKING AROUND, 47 00:02:04,758 --> 00:02:06,203 AND I SEE THE FOOD SITTING ON THE TABLES. 48 00:02:06,227 --> 00:02:09,406 THERE'S FLIES STARTING TO DIE RIGHT IN... RIGHT ON THE PLATES. 49 00:02:09,430 --> 00:02:11,341 HOW'S THE FOOD IN THIS PLACE, HUH? 50 00:02:11,365 --> 00:02:13,282 DON'T ASK. TERRIBLE! LOUSY! 51 00:02:13,350 --> 00:02:15,895 I BROUGHT MY GIRL HERE FOR DINNER LAST NIGHT, 52 00:02:15,919 --> 00:02:17,930 AND SHE FOUND A BUG IN HER SOUP. 53 00:02:17,954 --> 00:02:19,299 OH, THAT'S TERRIBLE. WHAT HAPPENED? 54 00:02:19,323 --> 00:02:22,291 SHE YELLED, "WAITER, REMOVE THIS INSECT AT ONCE." 55 00:02:22,359 --> 00:02:23,292 AND? 56 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:25,627 THE GUY THREW ME OUT. 57 00:02:25,696 --> 00:02:27,256 THAT WAS A GOOD ONE, HUH, LADY? 58 00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:29,058 THE OLD BROAD CAME ALIVE. 59 00:02:29,082 --> 00:02:30,560 WE'VE BEEN UP HERE A HALF-HOUR, 60 00:02:30,584 --> 00:02:31,894 AND THE OLD BROAD FINALLY WENT, 61 00:02:31,918 --> 00:02:33,062 "THAT WAS A GOOD ONE, LOU!" 62 00:02:33,086 --> 00:02:36,321 STOP COUGHING WHEN I'M DELIVERING FUNNY LINES. 63 00:02:36,390 --> 00:02:37,400 PUT YOURSELF IN A HOSPITAL 64 00:02:37,424 --> 00:02:38,735 AND JUST LAY THERE WITH THE COVERS OPEN 65 00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:41,059 AND LET THE NURSE STARE AT YOU. 66 00:02:41,127 --> 00:02:43,073 LOOK, IF YOU'RE HUNGRY, JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING. 67 00:02:43,097 --> 00:02:45,680 I HEAR THE TONGUE SANDWICH IS PRETTY GOOD. 68 00:02:45,749 --> 00:02:46,892 WELL, I'LL BE VERY HONEST WITH YOU. 69 00:02:46,916 --> 00:02:47,849 I NEVER EAT ANYTHING 70 00:02:47,917 --> 00:02:50,234 THAT COMES FROM AN ANIMAL'S MOUTH. 71 00:02:50,303 --> 00:02:52,271 WELL, THEN, HOW ABOUT SOME EGGS? 72 00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:53,872 OOH! 73 00:02:53,941 --> 00:02:55,252 OH, A WISE GUY, HUH, MORTY? 74 00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:56,208 YOU'RE STEAMING ME. 75 00:02:56,277 --> 00:02:57,209 REALLY GETTIN' TO ME. 76 00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:58,576 HA HA HA! 77 00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:00,656 Morty: HOLD ON TO THIS AUTOGRAPH, KID. 78 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,492 IT WILL BE WORTH A BUNDLE SOME DAY. 79 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,294 WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP, BILLY? 80 00:03:04,318 --> 00:03:06,196 A VENTRILOQUIST, JUST LIKE YOU. 81 00:03:06,220 --> 00:03:09,487 Woman: NONSENSE. HE WANTS TO BE A DOCTOR. DON'T YOU, BILLY? 82 00:03:09,556 --> 00:03:10,556 HEY, BILL. 83 00:03:10,624 --> 00:03:12,857 ANYTIME YOU NEED ANY ADVICE OR A FEW TIPS, 84 00:03:12,927 --> 00:03:14,893 FEEL FREE TO LOOK ME UP, OK, KID? 85 00:03:14,962 --> 00:03:16,773 GOLLY, MR. INGELS, THANKS. 86 00:03:16,797 --> 00:03:17,729 LOOK, MOM. 87 00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:19,331 IT'S LOVELY. LET'S GO. 88 00:03:32,279 --> 00:03:33,523 WE STILL GOT OUR DATE, DON'T WE? 89 00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:36,114 I KNOW THIS GREAT LITTLE AFTER-HOURS JOINT. 90 00:03:36,182 --> 00:03:38,283 I'M NOT FEELING VERY WELL. 91 00:03:38,351 --> 00:03:40,146 WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU'RE NOT FEELING VERY WELL? 92 00:03:40,170 --> 00:03:41,614 DON'T LISTEN TO HIM, BABY. 93 00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:44,239 HE'S NEVER FELT BETTER. LET'S GO. 94 00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:45,851 AND WHERE ARE YOU GOING TO TAKE ME TO? 95 00:03:45,875 --> 00:03:47,220 HOW ABOUT OUR BUNGALOW, TOOTS? 96 00:03:47,244 --> 00:03:49,277 WE'LL SHOW YOU OUR ETCHINGS. 97 00:03:49,346 --> 00:03:51,913 YOU ARE SO CUTE. 98 00:03:51,981 --> 00:03:52,914 AND YOU... 99 00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:55,302 YOU'RE NOT SO BAD YOURSELF. 100 00:04:00,891 --> 00:04:03,258 Woman: FIRE! HELP! 101 00:04:09,065 --> 00:04:10,810 LIGHTS OUT NOW, BILLY! 102 00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:14,202 OK, MOM. LIGHTS OUT. 103 00:04:14,271 --> 00:04:16,004 I SAID NOW! 104 00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:30,730 Woman: IS THERE ANYBODY IN THERE? 105 00:04:30,754 --> 00:04:31,703 I DON'T KNOW YET. 106 00:04:31,771 --> 00:04:32,704 I LOOKED AROUND THE BACK. 107 00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:33,772 I COULDN'T SEE NOTHING. 108 00:04:33,841 --> 00:04:36,236 HURRY UP! IT'S GOING UP LIKE A FURNACE. 109 00:04:36,260 --> 00:04:37,525 ANYBODY IN THERE? 110 00:04:37,594 --> 00:04:39,260 MOM, COME HERE QUICK! 111 00:04:57,447 --> 00:04:59,881 WE'RE HERE. 112 00:04:59,950 --> 00:05:02,850 OOPS. COME ON, TIM. 113 00:05:02,919 --> 00:05:06,121 OH, WOW. 114 00:05:06,190 --> 00:05:07,710 WHERE ARE WE? IS THIS... 115 00:05:09,693 --> 00:05:13,695 136. MUST BE IT. 116 00:05:13,763 --> 00:05:15,063 HI, MR. INGELS. 117 00:05:15,132 --> 00:05:17,265 HELLO, SIR. YOU PROBABLY... NO. 118 00:05:17,334 --> 00:05:19,367 HI, SIR. YOU PROBABLY DON'T REMEMBER ME. 119 00:05:19,436 --> 00:05:22,870 MY NAME IS BILLY GOLDMAN. 120 00:05:22,939 --> 00:05:24,739 I MET YOU A LONG TIME AGO. 121 00:05:27,861 --> 00:05:30,728 Man: IT'S PRIVATE PROPERTY, JERK-OFF. GO AWAY! 122 00:05:30,797 --> 00:05:33,009 MR. INGELS, SIR, YOU PROBABLY DON'T REMEMBER ME, 123 00:05:33,033 --> 00:05:34,310 BUT MY NAME IS BILLY GOLDMAN... 124 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,833 PISS OFF! YOU WANT IT IN WRITING, HUH? 125 00:05:35,903 --> 00:05:36,935 PISS OFF! 126 00:05:37,004 --> 00:05:38,647 I HAVE BEEN DRIVING FOR 3 DAYS. 127 00:05:38,671 --> 00:05:41,606 I AM NOT LEAVING UNTIL YOU TALK TO ME. 128 00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:44,276 HI, MY NAME IS TIM. 129 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:46,578 HI THERE. CAN MORTY COME OUT AND PLAY? 130 00:05:46,646 --> 00:05:49,380 OH, SHIT! 131 00:05:49,449 --> 00:05:50,615 COME ON IN, YOU... 132 00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:55,080 WELL, CLOSE THE DOOR, SCHMUCK. IT'S NOT A BARN. 133 00:05:59,809 --> 00:06:01,242 HEY, HEY. 134 00:06:01,311 --> 00:06:02,655 IT AIN'T GOING TO BE THAT LONG. 135 00:06:02,679 --> 00:06:04,107 HUH? WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND? MAKE YOUR POINT. 136 00:06:04,131 --> 00:06:06,298 I'M BILLY GOLDMAN. 137 00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:07,699 YOU SAID I COULD LOOK YOU UP. 138 00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:08,700 OH, YEAH? 139 00:06:08,768 --> 00:06:10,135 WELL, UMM... 140 00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:12,204 IT WAS 15 YEARS AGO. 141 00:06:12,272 --> 00:06:13,272 I WAS 11 YEARS OLD. 142 00:06:13,307 --> 00:06:14,968 OH, HE'S GOT A MEMORY LIKE AN ELEPHANT. 143 00:06:14,992 --> 00:06:16,519 HOW LUCKY CAN YOU GET? 144 00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:19,711 I WAS THERE. I SAW YOUR LAST PERFORMANCE. 145 00:06:19,780 --> 00:06:20,712 HOW WAS I? 146 00:06:20,781 --> 00:06:22,313 YOU... WELL, YOU WERE GREAT. 147 00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,415 YOU WERE UNBELIEVABLE. 148 00:06:23,483 --> 00:06:24,665 GOOD ANSWER. 149 00:06:24,734 --> 00:06:26,654 WHO WRITES YOUR MATERIAL? 150 00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,138 WOW! 151 00:06:30,206 --> 00:06:32,140 IS THAT MORTY? CAN I... I WANNA... 152 00:06:32,209 --> 00:06:33,586 NO! HEY! HEY! DON'T TOUCH THAT! 153 00:06:33,610 --> 00:06:34,542 LEAVE IT ALONE, WILL YA? 154 00:06:34,611 --> 00:06:36,911 HE'S RETIRED, LIKE ME. 155 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:38,191 WHAT IS IT WITH YOU? 156 00:06:38,215 --> 00:06:40,135 WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? 157 00:06:43,136 --> 00:06:45,086 SO MUCH HISTORY. 158 00:06:45,154 --> 00:06:46,220 SO MANY MEMORIES. 159 00:06:46,289 --> 00:06:49,924 "SHOWGIRL DIES IN TRAGIC RESORT FIRE. 160 00:06:49,993 --> 00:06:51,759 FAMOUS VENTRILOQUIST INJURED." 161 00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:01,336 SOME MEMORIES ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS. 162 00:07:01,405 --> 00:07:03,738 I'M NOT EVEN SURE HOW THE FIRE STARTED. 163 00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:09,994 ALL I KNOW IS... 164 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:11,740 I LOST EVERYTHING THAT NIGHT. 165 00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:13,264 EVERYTHING. 166 00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:15,633 COULDN'T YOU OPERATE MORTY WITH YOUR LEFT HAND? 167 00:07:15,702 --> 00:07:18,269 LEFT? LEFT? LEFT? 168 00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:19,548 THAT'S GOOD FOR OPENING DOORS 169 00:07:19,572 --> 00:07:21,523 AND SWATTING FLIES. 170 00:07:21,592 --> 00:07:24,859 THIS IS THE HAND THAT HAD THE MAGIC IN IT. 171 00:07:24,928 --> 00:07:26,506 WHY DID YOU COME, HUH? 172 00:07:26,530 --> 00:07:28,829 TO STIR UP OLD MEMORIES? 173 00:07:28,898 --> 00:07:30,948 TO PRY INTO MY PAIN? 174 00:07:31,018 --> 00:07:33,318 SPEAK UP, DAMN IT! 175 00:07:33,386 --> 00:07:37,872 UM, TOMORROW IS AMATEUR NIGHT AT THE NAUTICAL CLUB. 176 00:07:37,940 --> 00:07:40,040 I WANTED MY FIRST TIME IN FRONT OF AN AUDIENCE 177 00:07:40,109 --> 00:07:43,611 TO BE ON THE VERY SAME STAGE THAT I SAW YOU PERFORM. 178 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,547 I WAS HOPING THAT MAYBE YOU COULD COME BY 179 00:07:45,616 --> 00:07:48,049 AND GIVE ME YOUR CRITIQUE. 180 00:07:48,117 --> 00:07:49,550 YOU KNOW, MAYBE SOME POINTERS. 181 00:07:49,619 --> 00:07:51,736 I DON'T GO OUT MUCH. 182 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,805 YEAH, WELL... 183 00:07:53,873 --> 00:07:55,139 THANKS. UM... 184 00:07:55,209 --> 00:07:57,909 SORRY I WASTED YOUR TIME. 185 00:08:01,965 --> 00:08:05,900 MR. INGELS, EVER SINCE I SAW YOU THAT NIGHT, 186 00:08:05,969 --> 00:08:07,735 YOU'VE BEEN MY IDOL. 187 00:08:07,804 --> 00:08:09,620 BECAUSE OF YOU, 188 00:08:09,689 --> 00:08:13,825 ALL I'VE EVER WANTED TO BE IS A VENTRILOQUIST. 189 00:08:13,893 --> 00:08:17,395 I GOT TO KNOW IF I'VE GOT WHAT IT TAKES. 190 00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:18,646 ONLY YOU CAN TELL ME THAT. 191 00:08:22,552 --> 00:08:23,901 HEY, KID. 192 00:08:23,970 --> 00:08:27,105 WHAT'S YOUR NAME AGAIN? 193 00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:28,839 BILLY GOLDMAN. 194 00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:31,228 BILLY GOLDMAN, YOU FORGOT YOUR ACT. 195 00:08:38,101 --> 00:08:39,300 BILLY! 196 00:08:40,853 --> 00:08:42,893 I'LL THINK ABOUT IT. 197 00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:47,759 HE'LL THINK ABOUT IT. 198 00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:56,162 WHAT DO YOU THINK, MORTY? 199 00:08:56,186 --> 00:08:58,570 ♪ CAMPTOWN LADIES SING THIS SONG ♪ 200 00:08:58,639 --> 00:09:00,905 ♪ DOO-DAH, DOO-DAH ♪ 201 00:09:00,974 --> 00:09:03,141 ♪ CAMPTOWN RACETRACK 5 MILES LONG ♪ 202 00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:05,943 ♪ OH, DOO-DAH DAY... ♪ 203 00:09:06,012 --> 00:09:07,379 AMATEUR NIGHT. 204 00:09:07,447 --> 00:09:08,380 BOY, YOU SAID IT. 205 00:09:08,448 --> 00:09:10,148 SOUNDS LIKE A CAT IN HEAT. 206 00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:11,361 I THINK SHE'S PRETTY GOOD. 207 00:09:11,385 --> 00:09:12,484 HEY, WATCH IT! 208 00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:13,652 BIG TITS. 209 00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:15,030 THAT'S THE SECRET TO AMATEUR NIGHT. 210 00:09:15,054 --> 00:09:16,366 ALWAYS MAKE SURE YOU GOT BIG TITS. 211 00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:17,955 OTHERWISE, YOU'RE SOUTH. 212 00:09:18,024 --> 00:09:19,024 EXCUSE ME. HEY! 213 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,759 THANK YOU. 214 00:09:20,827 --> 00:09:23,728 ♪ ...GOING TO RUN ALL NIGHT ♪ 215 00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:25,263 ♪ GOING TO RUN ALL DAY ♪ 216 00:09:25,332 --> 00:09:27,832 ♪ I BET MY MONEY ON A BOBTAIL NAG ♪ 217 00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:30,234 ♪ SOMEBODY BET ON THE BAY ♪ 218 00:09:30,304 --> 00:09:31,553 OH, MY GOD. 219 00:09:31,621 --> 00:09:32,998 HE ACTUALLY CAME. HE'S HERE. 220 00:09:33,022 --> 00:09:33,954 HE'S HERE! 221 00:09:34,023 --> 00:09:34,955 LET'S GO! YOU'RE ON! 222 00:09:35,024 --> 00:09:36,068 LET'S GO! LET'S GO! COME ON! COME ON! 223 00:09:36,092 --> 00:09:37,892 OK, OK. MY CHAIR. 224 00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:39,238 GET YOUR CHAIR! THEY'RE WAITING FOR YOU! 225 00:09:39,262 --> 00:09:41,496 WHAT'S THE MATTER? COME ON! COME ON! 226 00:09:41,565 --> 00:09:43,097 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, 227 00:09:43,166 --> 00:09:46,367 AMATEUR NIGHT CONTINUES AT THE NAUTICAL CLUB 228 00:09:46,436 --> 00:09:48,636 WITH AN UNKNOWN, UNHEARD-OF, 229 00:09:48,705 --> 00:09:50,672 AND LIKELY TO STAY THAT WAY... 230 00:09:50,740 --> 00:09:52,373 JUST KIDDING... 231 00:09:52,442 --> 00:09:54,942 THE FABULOUS VENTRILOQUISM OF TIM... 232 00:09:55,011 --> 00:09:55,943 WHAT'S YOUR NAME? 233 00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:57,156 BILLY. MY NAME'S BILLY... 234 00:09:57,180 --> 00:09:58,313 AND BILLY! TIM AND BILLY! 235 00:09:58,381 --> 00:10:00,448 COME ON! PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER! COME ON! 236 00:10:04,254 --> 00:10:07,421 UM, THIS WILL JUST BE A SECOND. 237 00:10:07,490 --> 00:10:10,291 Tim: GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN... 238 00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:11,759 UH, LADIES AND GERMS. 239 00:10:15,866 --> 00:10:19,033 BRING BACK THE FUCKIN' GIRL WITH THE TITS. 240 00:10:19,102 --> 00:10:22,704 I JUST RECENTLY FLEW IN FROM NEW JERSEY. 241 00:10:22,773 --> 00:10:24,889 Audience: BET YOUR ARMS ARE TIRED! 242 00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:27,392 AND MY ARMS ARE TIRED. 243 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:36,400 COME ON, KID. YOU CAN DO IT. 244 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:37,802 BUT... 245 00:10:37,871 --> 00:10:38,803 BUT... 246 00:10:38,872 --> 00:10:41,238 BOO! BOO! 247 00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:43,141 BUT SERIOUSLY, FOLKS... AHEM. 248 00:10:47,030 --> 00:10:49,230 MY PARTNER AND MYSELF 249 00:10:49,298 --> 00:10:52,233 WOULD LIKE TO TAKE THIS TIME TO ANNOUNCE 250 00:10:52,301 --> 00:10:54,969 WE HAVE A SPECIAL GUEST IN THE AUDIENCE. 251 00:10:55,038 --> 00:10:55,987 UH... 252 00:10:56,056 --> 00:10:59,840 A MAN WHO, WITHOUT ANY DOUBT, 253 00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:03,911 IS PROBABLY THE WORLD'S GREATEST VENTRILOQUIST. 254 00:11:03,980 --> 00:11:06,481 Man: WHO CARES? 255 00:11:09,152 --> 00:11:11,352 GO HOME TO YOUR MAMA! 256 00:11:32,025 --> 00:11:33,102 HEY, CUTIE PIE. 257 00:11:33,126 --> 00:11:36,294 WANT TO BUY A GIRL A DRINK? 258 00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:38,096 YOU KNOW, YOU'RE KIND OF CUTE. 259 00:11:38,164 --> 00:11:40,298 YOU LOOK LIKE MY GRANDFATHER. 260 00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:43,467 I HAVE A SPECIAL TODAY ON FAMILY MEMBERS. 261 00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,014 LEAVE ME ALONE. LEAVE ME ALONE. 262 00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:48,306 WELL, IF YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND, I'M DOWN THERE. 263 00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:49,673 PERK UP. 264 00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:03,461 I WAS TERRIBLE, WASN'T I? 265 00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,391 IT WASN'T TERRIBLE. 266 00:12:10,196 --> 00:12:12,346 OK, IT WAS TERRIBLE. 267 00:12:12,415 --> 00:12:14,448 YOU HAD NO TECHNIQUE... 268 00:12:14,517 --> 00:12:17,034 NO CONCENTRATION, AND NO MATERIAL, 269 00:12:17,104 --> 00:12:19,787 AND YOU HAD NO IDEA HOW TO WORK THE AUDIENCE. 270 00:12:19,856 --> 00:12:23,341 BILLY, I SUGGEST YOU LOOK FOR ANOTHER LINE OF WORK. 271 00:12:23,410 --> 00:12:24,842 YEAH. 272 00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:27,378 LISTEN, UM, THANKS FOR COMING DOWN, 273 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:30,447 AND, UM, I'M SORRY ABOUT THE WASTED TRIP. 274 00:12:33,236 --> 00:12:34,786 BILLY. 275 00:12:38,725 --> 00:12:41,358 BILLY, I'M TRULY SORRY. 276 00:12:41,427 --> 00:12:43,194 BELIEVE ME. 277 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:44,746 I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE 278 00:12:44,814 --> 00:12:46,814 WHEN YOUR WHOLE LIFE'S DREAM 279 00:12:46,883 --> 00:12:49,917 CRUMBLES LIKE DUST IN YOUR HAND. 280 00:12:49,985 --> 00:12:51,018 THANKS. 281 00:13:03,583 --> 00:13:04,882 NO. 282 00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:34,912 CAN I BUY YOU A DRINK, MY DEAR? 283 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:38,916 WHAT WAS I FUCKIN' THINKING ABOUT? 284 00:13:38,984 --> 00:13:42,253 MY MOTHER WAS RIGHT! EVERYBODY'S BEEN RIGHT! 285 00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:43,588 FUCK YOU! 286 00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,556 AHH! 287 00:13:45,625 --> 00:13:47,791 AAH! 288 00:13:47,860 --> 00:13:49,927 OH! 289 00:13:52,131 --> 00:13:53,275 Man: WHAT HAPPENED HERE? 290 00:13:53,299 --> 00:13:54,977 Second man: AT FIRST, WE THOUGHT THEY WERE NECKING, 291 00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:57,647 BUT THEN THE GUY SAW US AND TOOK OFF RUNNING FOR THE WOODS! 292 00:13:57,671 --> 00:14:00,772 DID YOU SEE HIM? WHAT DID HE LOOK LIKE? 293 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:03,808 IT WAS DARK. HE DID IT! 294 00:14:03,877 --> 00:14:05,487 HORRIBLE! IT WAS HORRIBLE! 295 00:14:05,511 --> 00:14:06,656 HE WAS TRYING TO SET THE CAR ON FIRE! 296 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:08,290 IT STINKS OF GAS! NOBODY SMOKE! 297 00:14:08,314 --> 00:14:09,981 DON'T SMOKE! NOBODY SMOKE! 298 00:14:19,426 --> 00:14:21,892 MR. INGELS! OH, MY GOD. 299 00:14:21,961 --> 00:14:23,772 GET OUT OF HERE, GOD DAMN IT! 300 00:14:23,796 --> 00:14:25,312 OH! 301 00:14:25,381 --> 00:14:27,159 HEY! HEY! JUST GET THAT... 302 00:14:27,183 --> 00:14:28,994 WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU PULLING HERE? 303 00:14:29,018 --> 00:14:31,058 HEY, GIVE ME THAT! THAT'S MY MORPHINE! GIVE ME THAT! 304 00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:33,954 YOU IDIOT! DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING? 305 00:14:34,023 --> 00:14:36,063 YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A JUNKIE! 306 00:14:36,092 --> 00:14:37,502 TO THINK I ADMIRED YOU. 307 00:14:37,526 --> 00:14:39,672 TO THINK I WANTED TO BE JUST LIKE YOU. 308 00:14:39,696 --> 00:14:40,896 PLEASE. PLEASE, DON'T HURT ME. 309 00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:42,307 YOU KILLED THAT WOMAN TONIGHT, DIDN'T YOU? 310 00:14:42,331 --> 00:14:43,698 NO! NO, NOT ME! 311 00:14:43,766 --> 00:14:45,277 DON'T LIE TO ME, OLD MAN! 312 00:14:45,301 --> 00:14:46,344 YOU KILLED HER! 313 00:14:46,368 --> 00:14:47,445 YOU STINK OF GASOLINE! 314 00:14:47,469 --> 00:14:49,915 YOU TRIED TO SET A FIRE TO COVER IT UP 315 00:14:49,939 --> 00:14:51,416 JUST LIKE THAT OTHER WOMAN 15 YEARS AGO! 316 00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:54,374 NO! NO! I SET THOSE FIRE, BUT I NEVER KILLED... 317 00:14:54,443 --> 00:14:56,221 THEN WHO KILLED HER? WHO KILLED HER? 318 00:14:56,245 --> 00:14:57,978 MORTY! 319 00:14:58,047 --> 00:14:59,130 WHO? 320 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:02,533 MORTY. 321 00:15:06,272 --> 00:15:09,173 HE HATES WOMEN. 322 00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:10,642 HE'S NEVER BEEN ABLE TO HAVE A WOMAN 323 00:15:10,676 --> 00:15:13,177 IN A NORMAL WAY. 324 00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:16,013 OH, I... I TRY TO STOP HIM, 325 00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:18,182 BUT THERE'S JUST NO REASONING WITH MORTY. 326 00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:19,817 HE'S VERY WILLFUL... 327 00:15:22,405 --> 00:15:24,288 AND VERY PSYCHOTIC. 328 00:15:26,409 --> 00:15:30,278 MR. INGELS, THERE'S, UM, PEOPLE WHO WILL UNDERSTAND, 329 00:15:30,346 --> 00:15:33,014 PEOPLE WHO CAN HELP YOU. 330 00:15:33,082 --> 00:15:34,982 WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? 331 00:15:35,050 --> 00:15:36,751 I'M CRAZY? 332 00:15:36,820 --> 00:15:39,187 SPLIT PERSONALITY? 333 00:15:39,255 --> 00:15:40,804 THAT I HEAR VOICES IN MY HEAD 334 00:15:40,873 --> 00:15:44,191 IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT? 335 00:15:44,260 --> 00:15:46,594 I THINK YOU BETTER GO NOW... 336 00:15:46,662 --> 00:15:49,530 BEFORE MORTY TRIES TO HURT YOU. 337 00:15:49,599 --> 00:15:51,098 MORTY CAN'T HURT ME. 338 00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:54,435 HE... HE'S MADE OF CLOTH AND WOOD, 339 00:15:54,503 --> 00:15:56,487 NOTHING ELSE. 340 00:15:56,556 --> 00:15:58,239 YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING. 341 00:16:00,510 --> 00:16:01,942 I'LL SHOW YOU. 342 00:16:04,447 --> 00:16:06,664 MORTY... 343 00:16:06,733 --> 00:16:08,332 PLEASE. NOT AGAIN. 344 00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:10,584 HE CAN'T HURT ME. 345 00:16:10,653 --> 00:16:12,870 HE'S... HE'S NOT REAL. 346 00:16:15,558 --> 00:16:18,325 HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING. HE ISN'T ALIVE. 347 00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:19,961 HE'S JUST A DUMMY. 348 00:16:20,029 --> 00:16:22,129 THEY MANUFACTURED HIM. I'LL PROVE IT TO YOU. 349 00:16:22,198 --> 00:16:23,147 COME HERE, MR. INGLES. 350 00:16:23,216 --> 00:16:25,256 COME OVER HERE. TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. 351 00:16:27,536 --> 00:16:28,569 HE ISN'T REAL. 352 00:16:28,638 --> 00:16:30,116 HE'S CONSTRUCTED OF WOOD AND CLOTH, 353 00:16:30,140 --> 00:16:33,074 SOME WIRES, SOME CABLES. 354 00:16:33,143 --> 00:16:35,576 HE HAS NO MIND... 355 00:16:35,645 --> 00:16:36,744 NO SOUL. 356 00:16:36,812 --> 00:16:39,096 AND NO HEAD. 357 00:16:39,164 --> 00:16:40,431 AAH! 358 00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:41,500 AAH! 359 00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:45,569 YOU KNOW IT ALL, HUH? 360 00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:47,021 KNOW IT ALL, YOU LITTLE SHIT? 361 00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:48,156 AAH! 362 00:16:51,594 --> 00:16:54,262 GO ON! GO ON! YOU MISSED SOMETHING. 363 00:16:54,330 --> 00:16:56,531 TAKE A LOOK. GO AHEAD. 364 00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:58,566 LOOK! LOOK! 365 00:16:58,635 --> 00:16:59,733 LOOK AT IT! 366 00:16:59,802 --> 00:17:01,247 THAT'S RIGHT, A MASK! 367 00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:02,714 MORTY'S LIKE ME. HE'S REAL! 368 00:17:02,738 --> 00:17:03,765 HE'S FLESH AND BLOOD! 369 00:17:03,789 --> 00:17:07,341 IN FACT, MORTY IS MY BROTHER! 370 00:17:07,409 --> 00:17:08,442 HA HA HA! 371 00:17:08,510 --> 00:17:09,554 MY BROTHER! 372 00:17:09,578 --> 00:17:10,528 YOU SEE HIM? 373 00:17:10,597 --> 00:17:12,613 HERE'S MORTY! 374 00:17:12,682 --> 00:17:13,847 AAH! 375 00:17:13,916 --> 00:17:15,126 WE WERE BORN LIKE THIS. 376 00:17:15,150 --> 00:17:16,394 I GUESS WE WERE MEANT TO BE TWINS, 377 00:17:16,418 --> 00:17:18,447 BUT NATURE CAN WORK IN A CRUEL WAY SOMETIMES. 378 00:17:18,471 --> 00:17:20,432 BUT RATHER THAN GOING THROUGH LIFE AS FREAKS, 379 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,434 WE DECIDED ON A CAREER IN SHOW BUSINESS! 380 00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:25,126 YEAH. WE DECIDED TO PUT OUR HEADS TOGETHER. 381 00:17:25,194 --> 00:17:28,162 THAT'S A JOKE, SON. I DON'T SEE YOU LAUGHING. 382 00:17:28,231 --> 00:17:29,796 HA HA HA! 383 00:17:29,865 --> 00:17:32,382 FOR 15 YEARS, I KEPT HIM DRUGGED UP, 384 00:17:32,451 --> 00:17:33,767 AWAY FROM THE WORLD. 385 00:17:33,836 --> 00:17:35,135 ESPECIALLY THE LADIES. 386 00:17:35,204 --> 00:17:37,599 THEN YOU HAD TO COME ALONG AND STIR THINGS UP! 387 00:17:37,623 --> 00:17:39,807 Morty: GET THE CLEAVER! CUT HIM UP! 388 00:17:39,876 --> 00:17:42,021 YOU EVEN DESTROYED THE LAST OF THE MORPHINE, 389 00:17:42,045 --> 00:17:43,522 THE ONLY THING THAT COULD CALM HIM DOWN. 390 00:17:43,546 --> 00:17:46,747 NOW I CAN'T EVEN STOP HIM! HE'S VERY WILLFUL! 391 00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:49,316 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? TALK HIM TO DEATH? 392 00:17:49,385 --> 00:17:50,818 SLICE HIM! 393 00:17:50,887 --> 00:17:54,121 UNZIP HIS GUTS! KILL HIM! KILL HIM! 394 00:17:54,190 --> 00:17:55,255 KILL HIM! 395 00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:56,702 STOP IT! HE DOESN'T CONTROL YOU! 396 00:17:56,726 --> 00:17:59,104 YOU'RE THE VENTRILOQUIST! HE'S THE DUMMY! 397 00:17:59,128 --> 00:18:00,795 I'M THE BRAINS OF THIS OUTFIT! 398 00:18:00,863 --> 00:18:03,064 IT WAS MY IDEA TO GO INTO SHOW BIZ. 399 00:18:03,132 --> 00:18:06,767 I DESIGNED THE ACT! I WROTE ALL THE MATERIAL! 400 00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:08,836 I WROTE HIS AD-LIBS! 401 00:18:08,905 --> 00:18:12,339 HE'S JUST A STRAIGHT MAN. I'M THE FUNNY ONE! 402 00:18:12,408 --> 00:18:15,275 YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE BEING STUCK WITH MY BROTHER? 403 00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:18,845 ALL THOSE GORGEOUS BABES FLAUNTING THEMSELVES 404 00:18:18,915 --> 00:18:22,182 AND NOT ABLE TO DO A THING ABOUT IT WITHOUT HIM? 405 00:18:22,251 --> 00:18:24,418 DO IT! CARVE HIM UP! 406 00:18:24,486 --> 00:18:25,752 AAH! 407 00:18:25,821 --> 00:18:28,155 I'M SORRY, BILLY. YOU'RE A NICE KID. 408 00:18:28,224 --> 00:18:29,489 BUT I GOT TO CHOP YOU. 409 00:18:29,558 --> 00:18:31,403 I GOTTA CUT YOU TO STEAMING LITTLE PIECES! 410 00:18:31,427 --> 00:18:33,538 STOP! YOU CAN FIGHT HIM, MR. INGELS! 411 00:18:33,562 --> 00:18:35,029 YOU CAN FIGHT HIM. 412 00:18:35,097 --> 00:18:36,696 HE'LL TELL EVERYBODY ABOUT US! 413 00:18:36,765 --> 00:18:38,632 THEY'LL PUT US AWAY IN A DARK PLACE. 414 00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:40,801 LOCK US UP WITH ALL THE OTHER FREAKS! 415 00:18:40,869 --> 00:18:43,603 NOW, DO IT! CHOP HIS HEAD IN TWO! 416 00:18:43,672 --> 00:18:44,988 KILL HIM! KILL HIM! 417 00:18:45,057 --> 00:18:46,718 GET OUT OF MY HEAD, YOU LITTLE SHIT! 418 00:18:46,742 --> 00:18:48,209 GET OUT OF MY HEAD! 419 00:18:48,278 --> 00:18:49,676 AAH! 420 00:18:51,180 --> 00:18:52,546 AAH! 421 00:18:52,615 --> 00:18:55,182 AAH! 422 00:18:55,251 --> 00:18:57,151 AAH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 423 00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:59,203 I'M SPLITTING UP THE ACT! 424 00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:09,179 DON'T WORRY, MR. INGELS. YOU'LL BE OK! 425 00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:11,415 IT DOESN'T MATTER, BILLY. 426 00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:13,484 I'M FREE. I'M FINALLY FREE. 427 00:19:15,187 --> 00:19:17,154 AU CONTRAIRE, MEIN FRéRE. 428 00:19:17,223 --> 00:19:18,255 AAH! 429 00:19:18,324 --> 00:19:20,424 I'M THE ONE WHO'S FINALLY FREE! 430 00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:21,592 HA HA HA HA HA! 431 00:19:21,661 --> 00:19:22,781 AAH! 432 00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:25,295 AAH! 433 00:19:26,799 --> 00:19:27,799 AAH! 434 00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:31,956 BILLY, GET HIM OFF ME! 435 00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,738 GET HIM OFF ME! 436 00:19:33,806 --> 00:19:34,900 GET HIM... AAH! 437 00:19:34,924 --> 00:19:36,023 AAH! 438 00:19:37,759 --> 00:19:39,693 AAH! 439 00:19:42,231 --> 00:19:43,530 MR. INGELS! 440 00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:44,631 AAH! 441 00:19:47,803 --> 00:19:49,903 ALL RIGHT, YOU LITTLE FUCKER! 442 00:19:49,973 --> 00:19:53,274 I'M GOING TO PARK YOU IN THE CHEAP FUCKIN' SEATS! 443 00:19:53,343 --> 00:19:56,143 ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT, WHERE ARE YA? 444 00:19:56,212 --> 00:19:58,779 COME ON OUT. WHERE ARE YOU? 445 00:19:58,848 --> 00:20:01,866 GET THE POINT? HA HA HA! 446 00:20:01,934 --> 00:20:04,054 I'M GONNA TURN YOU INTO A GREASY LITTLE SMEAR, 447 00:20:04,103 --> 00:20:06,169 YOU SICK TURD! 448 00:20:06,238 --> 00:20:07,983 WHERE ARE YOU, YOU LITTLE FUCK? 449 00:20:08,007 --> 00:20:09,239 OVER HERE, TURKEY! 450 00:20:10,777 --> 00:20:12,142 WHAT A LOVELY BASTARD. 451 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:15,145 YOU INBRED FUCKIN' CABBAGE PATCH KID! 452 00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:16,530 YOU'RE A REAL SCHMUCK! 453 00:20:16,599 --> 00:20:19,950 I'M GONNA TURN YOU INTO BRAIN FUCKIN' PIE! 454 00:20:20,019 --> 00:20:22,419 HEY, MOE! HEY, LARRY! WOO WOO WOO WOO! 455 00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:26,596 HEY, BATTER, BATTER, BATTER. 456 00:20:27,559 --> 00:20:28,625 SWING! 457 00:20:28,694 --> 00:20:30,560 OHH! 458 00:20:30,629 --> 00:20:32,930 HEY, UMP. THE BATTER'S BLIND. 459 00:20:32,999 --> 00:20:35,332 THROW THAT BUM OUT OF THE GAME. 460 00:20:35,401 --> 00:20:37,618 GET HIM A DOG. WALK HIM AROUND. 461 00:20:37,686 --> 00:20:40,015 WHY, MY OWN GRANDMOTHER CAN HIT BETTER THAN THAT. 462 00:20:40,039 --> 00:20:42,339 WHAT A MORON! MORON! 463 00:20:42,408 --> 00:20:44,992 THERE'S THE PITCH! BATTER SWINGS! 464 00:20:45,061 --> 00:20:47,127 OHH! AAH! 465 00:20:50,032 --> 00:20:50,965 OH! 466 00:20:51,033 --> 00:20:52,033 HOME RUN! 467 00:20:52,068 --> 00:20:54,735 NO, NOT THE MEAT GRINDER! 468 00:20:54,803 --> 00:20:56,070 OW! 469 00:20:56,138 --> 00:20:57,671 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 470 00:20:57,740 --> 00:20:59,773 I'M MAKIN' AN ASSHOLE CASSEROLE, PAL, 471 00:20:59,842 --> 00:21:02,142 AND YOU'RE THE MAIN INGREDIENT. 472 00:21:02,211 --> 00:21:05,412 OH, JESUS, IT'S KILLING... NO! 473 00:21:05,481 --> 00:21:06,747 WAIT! 474 00:21:06,815 --> 00:21:07,948 WE CAN MAKE A DEAL. 475 00:21:08,017 --> 00:21:09,516 SHUT UP! 476 00:21:09,585 --> 00:21:12,019 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? 477 00:21:12,088 --> 00:21:14,369 OH, JESUS CHRIST, IT'S KILLING ME. 478 00:21:14,423 --> 00:21:16,423 I'LL DO ANYTHING YOU WANT. 479 00:21:16,492 --> 00:21:17,791 OW! 480 00:21:17,860 --> 00:21:21,161 ANYTHING! ANYTHING! I SWEAR! 481 00:21:21,230 --> 00:21:23,197 ANYTHING? 482 00:21:23,266 --> 00:21:26,433 MMM. MMM. 483 00:21:28,670 --> 00:21:33,557 AND NOW, DIRECT FROM LAS VEGAS, HERE'S MORTY AND BILLY! 484 00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:35,425 IT'S SHOWTIME, FOLKS. 485 00:21:37,196 --> 00:21:40,064 SHE SAYS TO ME, "YOU KNOW A BETTER WAY TO STUDY ASTRONOMY?" 486 00:21:40,132 --> 00:21:41,576 WELL, WHAT DID YOU DO THEN? 487 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:42,600 WHAT ELSE? 488 00:21:42,668 --> 00:21:45,336 I SHOWED HER MY TELESCOPE, THE BIG ONE! 489 00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:49,557 I'M TELLING YA. SHE REALLY SAW STARS THAT NIGHT. 490 00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:52,676 HOLD THE PHONE. 491 00:21:52,745 --> 00:21:56,062 LOOK WHAT JUST WALKED IN. 492 00:21:56,131 --> 00:21:59,900 HUBBA HUBBA YEOW! 493 00:21:59,969 --> 00:22:01,685 WHAT A TOMATO. 494 00:22:01,754 --> 00:22:04,254 MORTY, UM, ABOUT THE TELESCOPE, 495 00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:07,302 DID YOU DISCOVER ANY OTHER NEW HEAVENLY BODIES THAT NIGHT? 496 00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:10,093 YOU BET YOUR ASS. FEAST YOUR EYES ON HER. 497 00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:12,930 HEY, BABY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING AFTER THE SHOW? 498 00:22:12,999 --> 00:22:14,476 STICK TO THE MATERIAL, DAMN IT. 499 00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:16,033 FORGET THE MATERIAL. 500 00:22:16,101 --> 00:22:17,501 THAT TOOTS IS MAKING EYES AT ME. 501 00:22:17,570 --> 00:22:18,690 I'M WARNING YOU. 502 00:22:18,738 --> 00:22:21,255 I BET SHE COULD SUCK THE VARNISH OFF A FOOT STOOL. 503 00:22:21,324 --> 00:22:23,257 COULDN'T YA, HONEY? 504 00:22:23,326 --> 00:22:24,602 LOOK, WE HAD AN AGREEMENT! 505 00:22:24,626 --> 00:22:25,926 YOU GET TOP BILLING. 506 00:22:25,995 --> 00:22:27,105 THE LADIES ARE OFF-LIMITS! 507 00:22:27,129 --> 00:22:28,495 NOW, CUT THIS SHIT 508 00:22:28,564 --> 00:22:31,276 OR I'LL SHOVE YOU RIGHT BACK INTO THAT MEAT GRINDER. 509 00:22:31,300 --> 00:22:33,450 I THINK YOU'RE GONNA FIND THAT A LITTLE DIFFICULT, 510 00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:35,619 NOT TO MENTION PAINFUL. 511 00:22:35,688 --> 00:22:36,620 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 512 00:22:36,689 --> 00:22:38,288 RENEGOTIATING OUR DEAL. 513 00:22:38,357 --> 00:22:39,389 AAH! 514 00:22:39,458 --> 00:22:40,374 AAH! 515 00:22:40,443 --> 00:22:43,126 LET'S GO. COME ON. 516 00:22:43,195 --> 00:22:44,561 AAH! 517 00:22:44,630 --> 00:22:46,680 PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER. 518 00:22:46,749 --> 00:22:49,616 AAH! 519 00:22:49,685 --> 00:22:52,552 TRY TO SCRATCH YOUR ASS NOW, BUSTER. 520 00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:54,188 HA HA HA! 521 00:22:54,256 --> 00:22:56,656 LOOKS LIKE WE'RE STUCK WITH EACH OTHER. 522 00:22:56,725 --> 00:22:58,091 AAH! 523 00:23:00,696 --> 00:23:02,663 WHAT DO YOU SAY, FOLKS? 524 00:23:02,731 --> 00:23:05,799 BILLY DESERVES A BIG HAND, DON'T YOU THINK? 525 00:23:07,052 --> 00:23:07,968 SHEESH! 526 00:23:08,037 --> 00:23:09,681 THE THINGS SOME FOLKS WILL DO 527 00:23:09,705 --> 00:23:12,973 TO GET AHEAD IN SHOW BUSINESS. 528 00:23:13,042 --> 00:23:14,208 OH, WELL. 529 00:23:14,276 --> 00:23:17,894 NEXT TIME SOMEBODY TELLS BILLY HE'S NO DUMMY, 530 00:23:17,964 --> 00:23:20,831 HE CAN SAY, "WANT TO BET?" 531 00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,766 AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!35339

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