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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:40,799 --> 00:00:41,801 Presenting tonight's Atlas Awards, 2 00:00:41,801 --> 00:00:43,302 Adam Lyons. 3 00:00:50,814 --> 00:00:52,317 Thank you. 4 00:00:52,317 --> 00:00:54,320 At Kennedy and Collins where I work in New York, 5 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:56,323 we have this saying: 6 00:00:56,323 --> 00:00:58,827 "The only thing better than great sex 7 00:00:58,827 --> 00:01:00,830 is a great ad campaign." 8 00:01:00,830 --> 00:01:03,333 So when I was asked to come to Pittsburgh 9 00:01:03,333 --> 00:01:05,337 to help choose the Ad Person of the Year, 10 00:01:05,838 --> 00:01:09,343 what I was looking for was someone who could give great ad. 11 00:01:09,343 --> 00:01:12,347 Someone whose work would make me stand up and take notice. 12 00:01:12,347 --> 00:01:16,354 Well, after reviewing this year's entries, 13 00:01:16,354 --> 00:01:17,857 I believe we found him. 14 00:01:18,858 --> 00:01:20,360 This year's Atlas Award 15 00:01:20,861 --> 00:01:23,365 for Pittsburgh's Ad Person of the Year goes to... 16 00:01:25,368 --> 00:01:26,369 Brian Kinney. 17 00:01:26,870 --> 00:01:28,372 Yes! 18 00:01:28,372 --> 00:01:30,877 Go and get him, tiger. 19 00:01:30,877 --> 00:01:32,378 The award, I mean. 20 00:01:45,399 --> 00:01:46,400 Yeah! 21 00:01:48,403 --> 00:01:50,908 Care to test that saying? 22 00:02:23,960 --> 00:02:25,963 I was standing there with my dick out, 23 00:02:25,963 --> 00:02:28,466 when this guy at the urinal next to me started cruising me. 24 00:02:28,466 --> 00:02:30,469 Did you cruise him back? 25 00:02:30,469 --> 00:02:31,972 - No. - So you did nothing 26 00:02:31,972 --> 00:02:33,975 to make him think you were looking for sex? 27 00:02:34,475 --> 00:02:35,978 I just wanted to take a piss. 28 00:02:35,978 --> 00:02:37,981 Same thing happened to this guy from my gym. 29 00:02:37,981 --> 00:02:40,485 He was out walking his dog, starts talking to some guy, 30 00:02:40,485 --> 00:02:42,488 who invites him back to his place. 31 00:02:42,488 --> 00:02:43,991 Next thing you know, he's busted. 32 00:02:43,991 --> 00:02:44,992 They can really do that? 33 00:02:44,992 --> 00:02:46,995 They can do whatever the hell they want. 34 00:02:46,995 --> 00:02:47,997 Fuck that. 35 00:02:47,997 --> 00:02:50,000 - Better fight it. - Hey! 36 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:51,502 You don't put any ideas in his head. 37 00:02:52,003 --> 00:02:54,006 You wanted me to fight for the Gay-Straight Alliance at school. 38 00:02:54,006 --> 00:02:55,007 This is different. 39 00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:57,010 You're 18 and you're healthy. 40 00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:58,512 What are our other options? 41 00:02:58,512 --> 00:02:59,514 To plead guilty. 42 00:03:02,519 --> 00:03:04,022 Would he have to go to jail? 43 00:03:04,022 --> 00:03:05,024 No, not for a first offense. 44 00:03:05,524 --> 00:03:06,525 I mean, you'd pay a fine. 45 00:03:06,525 --> 00:03:08,028 I'll take it. 46 00:03:08,028 --> 00:03:10,031 Pay the $2.00 and be done with it. 47 00:03:10,031 --> 00:03:12,534 And it will be on your record. Permanently. 48 00:03:12,534 --> 00:03:14,037 What, you mean as a sex offender? 49 00:03:14,537 --> 00:03:16,540 Oh, will they make him register with the police and everything? 50 00:03:17,042 --> 00:03:18,543 Yeah, they will. 51 00:03:18,543 --> 00:03:20,046 Jesus. 52 00:03:20,046 --> 00:03:21,548 Well... 53 00:03:21,548 --> 00:03:23,552 There goes my shot at the Supreme Court. 54 00:03:23,552 --> 00:03:25,055 You could plead not guilty. 55 00:03:25,055 --> 00:03:26,456 One more word out of you... 56 00:03:26,557 --> 00:03:28,059 Well, that would involve going to trial. 57 00:03:28,059 --> 00:03:30,062 You'd have to get up in front of a jury, 58 00:03:30,062 --> 00:03:32,065 and some young, aggressive, prosecutor 59 00:03:32,065 --> 00:03:34,569 from the D.A.'s office would cross-examine you, 60 00:03:34,569 --> 00:03:36,572 the cop who arrested you would be sitting in the front row... 61 00:03:36,572 --> 00:03:38,074 I can't do that. 62 00:03:39,576 --> 00:03:41,079 He can't take any more stress. 63 00:03:41,079 --> 00:03:42,581 So you have a misdemeanor on your record. 64 00:03:43,082 --> 00:03:44,585 Who's going to know? 65 00:03:44,585 --> 00:03:45,586 He will. 66 00:03:49,092 --> 00:03:52,097 So what the hell are you doing in Pittsburgh? 67 00:03:52,097 --> 00:03:54,600 - What? - You're too good for Pittsburgh. 68 00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:56,603 You should be in New York. 69 00:03:56,603 --> 00:03:58,106 Yeah, but for what I pay here, 70 00:03:58,606 --> 00:04:01,610 I have a loft the size of a city block. 71 00:04:01,610 --> 00:04:03,113 And there, I'd have a closet in Queens. 72 00:04:03,613 --> 00:04:06,619 Wouldn't believe the salaries they're paying in the city these days. 73 00:04:06,619 --> 00:04:07,620 I'm 27. 74 00:04:08,122 --> 00:04:11,626 I just bought an amazing duplex, in Soho. 75 00:04:11,626 --> 00:04:14,631 Wow, so... we're the same age. 76 00:04:15,132 --> 00:04:17,636 You know, in fact, that there's an opening at my agency. 77 00:04:17,636 --> 00:04:18,637 At your level. 78 00:04:18,637 --> 00:04:20,140 And you've clearly got experience 79 00:04:20,140 --> 00:04:22,143 and you're an award winner. 80 00:04:22,143 --> 00:04:23,144 Hmm. 81 00:04:23,144 --> 00:04:26,649 I'd be happy to put in a good word for you. 82 00:04:31,157 --> 00:04:35,163 Is there anything else you'd be... happy to do? 83 00:04:47,182 --> 00:04:49,686 What are you doing sitting in the dark? 84 00:04:50,187 --> 00:04:51,189 Thinking. 85 00:04:51,189 --> 00:04:52,190 How's Vic? 86 00:04:52,190 --> 00:04:54,693 Okay, considering he just got out of jail. 87 00:05:00,202 --> 00:05:01,704 I got a call from Lori. 88 00:05:01,704 --> 00:05:02,706 Oh yeah? 89 00:05:02,706 --> 00:05:05,710 She and Gary are getting a divorce. 90 00:05:05,710 --> 00:05:08,214 That's too bad. You know, these straight couples 91 00:05:08,715 --> 00:05:11,220 cannot make their marriages work. 92 00:05:11,220 --> 00:05:12,221 Hank's pretty upset. 93 00:05:14,224 --> 00:05:16,728 Well, yeah, I guess he must be. 94 00:05:18,731 --> 00:05:19,732 She said he's not speaking to her, 95 00:05:19,732 --> 00:05:22,737 he's ditching class, his grades stink. 96 00:05:22,737 --> 00:05:24,239 He's even quit the hockey team. 97 00:05:24,239 --> 00:05:25,741 He's not doing drugs, is he? 98 00:05:25,741 --> 00:05:28,746 No, she doesn't think so. He's just fucking angry. 99 00:05:30,749 --> 00:05:32,253 And it's because of me. 100 00:05:32,253 --> 00:05:33,754 Did he say that? 101 00:05:33,754 --> 00:05:34,756 No, I did. 102 00:05:37,260 --> 00:05:39,263 This will make the second dad that he's lost. 103 00:05:45,272 --> 00:05:46,274 So, what's the plan? 104 00:05:47,275 --> 00:05:48,377 - The plan? - Well... 105 00:05:48,378 --> 00:05:50,780 a real trip would accomplish a lot more than a guilt trip. 106 00:05:50,780 --> 00:05:51,782 Should I make a reservation? 107 00:05:51,782 --> 00:05:52,783 I already did. 108 00:05:56,290 --> 00:05:58,293 There's a red-eye out of Chicago with a connection 109 00:05:58,293 --> 00:06:00,296 that'll put me in Portland first thing in the morning. 110 00:06:02,299 --> 00:06:04,802 I figure the sooner i get there... 111 00:06:04,802 --> 00:06:08,308 Well, who says you're not a great dad? 112 00:06:08,308 --> 00:06:10,311 Dropping everything at a moment's notice 113 00:06:10,311 --> 00:06:12,814 to fly across the country to be with your kid? 114 00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:16,321 So, when will you be back? 115 00:06:16,321 --> 00:06:17,323 Soon as I can. 116 00:06:20,327 --> 00:06:22,330 This'll be the first time we've been apart. 117 00:06:22,830 --> 00:06:23,332 Yeah. 118 00:06:26,836 --> 00:06:28,839 It's gonna be weird, you not being here. 119 00:06:31,844 --> 00:06:33,347 Promise me you'll miss me? 120 00:06:35,350 --> 00:06:36,351 A lot. 121 00:06:46,367 --> 00:06:48,370 Ah, if you see anything in there for an accountant 122 00:06:48,370 --> 00:06:50,874 that includes world travel and an unlimited expense account, 123 00:06:50,874 --> 00:06:54,880 - let me know. - First I have to find a job for myself. 124 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:56,382 Any possibilities? 125 00:06:56,883 --> 00:06:58,887 Sure, but they all want training, 126 00:06:58,887 --> 00:07:00,390 Experience, references. 127 00:07:00,390 --> 00:07:02,393 Who's going to hire a crystal freak? 128 00:07:02,393 --> 00:07:04,896 Former crystal freak. 129 00:07:04,896 --> 00:07:06,899 Give yourself a little credit 130 00:07:06,899 --> 00:07:08,902 for all the positive steps you've been taking. Okay? 131 00:07:08,902 --> 00:07:09,903 Thanks to you. 132 00:07:13,409 --> 00:07:15,412 Hello, young lovers. 133 00:07:19,919 --> 00:07:21,422 There's the guys, come on. 134 00:07:23,425 --> 00:07:24,427 Ted Schmidt, 135 00:07:24,427 --> 00:07:25,428 happy at last. 136 00:07:26,430 --> 00:07:27,932 It's fucking unbelievable. 137 00:07:27,932 --> 00:07:29,434 Uh, yeah, who would've guessed? 138 00:07:29,434 --> 00:07:31,437 Yeah. Could you just keep the passion to a minimum? 139 00:07:31,437 --> 00:07:33,941 I have a boyfriend out of town and no means for release. 140 00:07:35,443 --> 00:07:36,445 Have you guys seen the new waiter? 141 00:07:41,954 --> 00:07:42,955 Yowza! 142 00:07:42,955 --> 00:07:43,957 You call that hot? 143 00:07:43,957 --> 00:07:44,958 Yeah. 144 00:07:44,958 --> 00:07:46,961 At your age, I guess you would. 145 00:07:47,463 --> 00:07:48,964 Oh, at your age you wouldn't? 146 00:07:48,964 --> 00:07:49,966 I've moved beyond that. 147 00:07:49,966 --> 00:07:51,469 Since when? 148 00:07:51,469 --> 00:07:52,970 Since last night. 149 00:07:53,472 --> 00:07:54,973 I did the hottest guy... 150 00:07:54,973 --> 00:07:56,476 in days. 151 00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:58,479 He's an Ad Exec from New York. 152 00:07:58,979 --> 00:08:01,484 He said I'm too good for Pittsburgh and that I'm wasting my time here. 153 00:08:01,484 --> 00:08:02,485 He thinks I should be there. 154 00:08:02,485 --> 00:08:03,988 I bet he says that to all the boys. 155 00:08:04,489 --> 00:08:06,992 He said... there's a job at his agency 156 00:08:06,992 --> 00:08:08,495 that I'd be perfect for. 157 00:08:10,498 --> 00:08:12,501 I faxed him my resume. 158 00:08:12,501 --> 00:08:13,503 You're not serious. 159 00:08:13,503 --> 00:08:14,504 You don't think so? 160 00:08:14,504 --> 00:08:16,507 So if you get this job, you're leaving? 161 00:08:16,507 --> 00:08:18,009 Not "if", "when". 162 00:08:29,528 --> 00:08:31,531 Do you think he really meant it? 163 00:08:31,531 --> 00:08:33,033 He's really going to go? 164 00:08:33,033 --> 00:08:35,036 Well... of course not. 165 00:08:35,036 --> 00:08:37,039 He's probably just boasting 'cause some... 166 00:08:37,039 --> 00:08:39,042 big shot from New York is complimenting him. 167 00:08:39,543 --> 00:08:41,546 And the bright lights of Broadway beckon. 168 00:08:41,546 --> 00:08:43,549 I don't know, he sounded pretty serious. 169 00:08:43,549 --> 00:08:45,051 He even sent him his resume. 170 00:08:45,051 --> 00:08:46,555 You know where that's going to end up, don't you? 171 00:08:46,555 --> 00:08:49,058 On the bottom of some pile. Mine always do. 172 00:08:49,058 --> 00:08:51,061 Yeah, probably a thousand other guys 173 00:08:51,061 --> 00:08:53,064 - clamouring for the very same job. - No, trust me, 174 00:08:53,064 --> 00:08:54,567 he's never going to hear from them again. 175 00:08:54,567 --> 00:08:57,070 Oh, shoot, there's a call. All right, I'll talk to you guys later 176 00:08:57,080 --> 00:08:58,072 - Okay. - Bye. 177 00:09:00,075 --> 00:09:01,076 Yeah? 178 00:09:01,076 --> 00:09:02,579 You called? 179 00:09:02,579 --> 00:09:04,582 Yeah, thanks for returning. 180 00:09:04,582 --> 00:09:07,085 Listen, Blake is looking 181 00:09:07,085 --> 00:09:09,590 for a job and he's interested in becoming a paralegal. 182 00:09:09,590 --> 00:09:12,094 And I thought possibly you might have an opening at your firm? 183 00:09:12,094 --> 00:09:14,097 God, you are so in luck. 184 00:09:14,097 --> 00:09:16,100 One of our assistants just quit this morning. 185 00:09:16,100 --> 00:09:18,103 He could start right away. 186 00:09:18,103 --> 00:09:19,104 Really? 187 00:09:19,104 --> 00:09:21,107 Of course not. 188 00:09:21,107 --> 00:09:23,612 What do you think? Jobs are just falling off trees? 189 00:09:23,612 --> 00:09:26,115 All right, no need to get cunty. Just thought I'd ask. 190 00:09:26,115 --> 00:09:29,622 Although... he is a nice guy and he did help Vic out. 191 00:09:29,622 --> 00:09:32,125 You know, maybe we could take him on as a temp for a couple weeks, 192 00:09:32,125 --> 00:09:33,628 see how he does and find him a referral. 193 00:09:33,628 --> 00:09:35,631 That'd be great. 194 00:09:36,131 --> 00:09:40,137 And, uh, Mel? You're not really, you know. 195 00:09:40,137 --> 00:09:41,640 I know, you are. 196 00:09:57,164 --> 00:09:58,165 For you. 197 00:10:01,671 --> 00:10:03,173 A pecan pie? 198 00:10:03,173 --> 00:10:05,176 Well, whenever my mother paid a visit 199 00:10:05,176 --> 00:10:07,680 she always brought along a pecan pie. 200 00:10:07,680 --> 00:10:10,685 Of course, this one's from the supermarket. 201 00:10:10,685 --> 00:10:13,189 She baked her own. 202 00:10:13,189 --> 00:10:15,192 Her pies were so... 203 00:10:16,193 --> 00:10:18,196 Awful... you know. 204 00:10:18,196 --> 00:10:19,699 No one really noticed though, 205 00:10:19,699 --> 00:10:21,201 'cause she was such a chatterbox. 206 00:10:21,201 --> 00:10:23,705 That's what everyone called her, "chatterbox". 207 00:10:24,205 --> 00:10:26,208 I suppose I'm like her in that regard. 208 00:10:26,208 --> 00:10:27,711 Real little chatterbox. 209 00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:30,214 I never noticed. 210 00:10:30,214 --> 00:10:32,719 Yeah, whenever anything was happening in the neighbourhood, 211 00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:36,726 you could always count on Enid to be right there with her pie. 212 00:10:36,726 --> 00:10:39,730 So, uh... 213 00:10:39,730 --> 00:10:41,733 so, is anything happening? 214 00:10:41,733 --> 00:10:45,238 Yeah, I'm taking out the garbage. 215 00:10:45,238 --> 00:10:47,742 I mean about your upcoming court appearance. 216 00:10:52,249 --> 00:10:53,751 I plan to plead guilty. 217 00:10:54,252 --> 00:10:55,756 Please don't. 218 00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:58,259 Look, it's got nothing to do with you. 219 00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:00,262 No, that's where you're wrong. 220 00:11:00,262 --> 00:11:02,265 It has everything to do with me, with all of us. 221 00:11:02,265 --> 00:11:04,268 Because it could happen to any of us. 222 00:11:04,268 --> 00:11:07,272 Well, it didn't happen to any of you. It happened to me. 223 00:11:07,774 --> 00:11:09,777 By not fighting, you're letting them know 224 00:11:09,777 --> 00:11:11,278 that they can keep getting away with this. 225 00:11:11,278 --> 00:11:12,781 I'm sick. 226 00:11:12,781 --> 00:11:15,284 You're also innocent. 227 00:11:15,284 --> 00:11:16,286 Who gives a shit? 228 00:11:18,791 --> 00:11:20,794 The cops, the D.A.? 229 00:11:20,794 --> 00:11:22,296 I was hoping you. 230 00:11:22,797 --> 00:11:23,799 Or me. 231 00:11:23,799 --> 00:11:25,301 I just want it over. 232 00:11:25,301 --> 00:11:28,806 So I can bring out the trash in peace and quiet. 233 00:11:28,806 --> 00:11:30,308 As a registered sex offender. 234 00:11:31,811 --> 00:11:33,313 Jesus Christ. 235 00:11:33,313 --> 00:11:34,314 Do you have to broadcast it? 236 00:11:34,815 --> 00:11:37,319 Everyone's going to know anyway. 237 00:11:37,319 --> 00:11:39,824 Fine. Then I'll just have to live with it. 238 00:11:44,330 --> 00:11:46,835 That's just what, uh, what Mr. Pettigrew said. 239 00:11:48,838 --> 00:11:50,339 Who? 240 00:11:50,339 --> 00:11:51,341 Mr. Pettigrew. 241 00:11:52,844 --> 00:11:55,848 A high school teacher back home in Hazelhurst. 242 00:11:55,848 --> 00:11:59,854 He was accused of exposing himself to one of his students. 243 00:11:59,854 --> 00:12:01,858 He swore it wasn't true, that the kid was lying 244 00:12:01,858 --> 00:12:03,861 'cause he flunked him. 245 00:12:04,361 --> 00:12:07,366 And I suppose you're going to tell me he was beaten to death, 246 00:12:07,867 --> 00:12:09,369 or hung himself in his jail cell. 247 00:12:09,369 --> 00:12:11,372 No, no. 248 00:12:11,873 --> 00:12:14,878 No, he went to live with his spinster sister in Meridian. 249 00:12:16,881 --> 00:12:18,884 When he died a few years later, 250 00:12:18,884 --> 00:12:21,387 they say he put in his will 251 00:12:21,889 --> 00:12:23,892 that he didn't want his name on his tombstone... 252 00:12:26,396 --> 00:12:27,397 because it was worthless. 253 00:12:40,918 --> 00:12:41,920 Don't go. 254 00:12:42,420 --> 00:12:44,424 You can't go. 255 00:12:44,424 --> 00:12:45,927 What are you gonna do without me? 256 00:12:47,428 --> 00:12:49,431 I don't know, I guess I'll survive. 257 00:12:51,936 --> 00:12:52,937 I doubt it. 258 00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:56,442 What about me? 259 00:12:58,946 --> 00:13:01,951 I'm sure you'll get along just fine on your own. 260 00:13:02,451 --> 00:13:03,954 No, I won't. 261 00:13:04,454 --> 00:13:05,457 Yeah, you will. 262 00:13:05,958 --> 00:13:06,959 You're going to do what you should've done 263 00:13:07,460 --> 00:13:08,962 A long time ago, 264 00:13:08,962 --> 00:13:11,466 you're going to meet some twinkie your own age. 265 00:13:11,466 --> 00:13:13,970 What do you think I want with some kid who doesn't know shit? 266 00:13:17,475 --> 00:13:18,476 I need to take a shower. 267 00:13:19,478 --> 00:13:20,981 Go. 268 00:13:20,981 --> 00:13:21,982 Go take your shower. 269 00:13:23,484 --> 00:13:25,487 Go to New York. Go to your new life. 270 00:13:26,991 --> 00:13:29,494 In a year, probably not even that long... 271 00:13:29,995 --> 00:13:31,497 you won't even remember my name. 272 00:13:31,497 --> 00:13:33,500 Oh, what happened to that kid who wouldn't leave me alone? 273 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:36,004 Who thought he was in love with me? 274 00:13:36,004 --> 00:13:38,507 If you fucking think of me at all. 275 00:13:43,015 --> 00:13:44,016 I won't. 276 00:13:48,023 --> 00:13:49,025 I won't think of you. 277 00:13:53,531 --> 00:13:55,034 When I walk out that door, 278 00:13:55,534 --> 00:13:57,537 I don't plan on ever looking back. 279 00:14:02,044 --> 00:14:03,046 And I expect you to do the same. 280 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:49,618 It's the perfect interview suit. 281 00:14:49,719 --> 00:14:50,720 You sure? 282 00:14:50,730 --> 00:14:53,125 Trust your boyfriend. He's got a good eye. 283 00:14:53,135 --> 00:14:55,628 There, you're all set. So I'll go ring this up. 284 00:15:36,692 --> 00:15:38,194 What are you doing? 285 00:15:38,295 --> 00:15:40,198 I thought maybe you could use a little... 286 00:15:40,198 --> 00:15:44,204 - hand with your pants here. - Uh, well, hmm. 287 00:15:44,204 --> 00:15:46,707 - I'm a... a big boy and... - I'll help you out... 288 00:15:46,707 --> 00:15:50,213 I can dress and... undress myself. 289 00:15:50,213 --> 00:15:51,714 Yeah, but all these pins. 290 00:15:51,714 --> 00:15:53,717 I mean, you know, you might get pricked. 291 00:15:53,717 --> 00:15:54,719 Hmm. 292 00:15:54,719 --> 00:15:56,222 - Ow! - See? 293 00:15:56,222 --> 00:15:58,000 Be careful. 294 00:15:58,006 --> 00:15:59,727 Careful. 295 00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:09,343 Let's go for it. 296 00:16:09,353 --> 00:16:10,744 In here? 297 00:16:10,755 --> 00:16:12,747 What if we get caught? 298 00:16:12,848 --> 00:16:14,250 That's the fun part. 299 00:16:42,794 --> 00:16:43,796 You doing okay in there? 300 00:16:43,796 --> 00:16:44,797 Huh? 301 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:47,302 - Fine. - Great. 302 00:16:47,302 --> 00:16:48,303 Thanks. 303 00:16:48,303 --> 00:16:49,805 Here, give her these. 304 00:16:51,808 --> 00:16:53,311 Done with these. 305 00:16:56,317 --> 00:16:59,000 Uh, take all the time you need, boys. 306 00:16:59,020 --> 00:17:00,321 Oh, we will. 307 00:17:16,847 --> 00:17:18,850 ...It's just not the report I expected. 308 00:17:18,850 --> 00:17:20,853 I have to have my client... 309 00:17:20,853 --> 00:17:22,356 Try and relax. 310 00:17:22,356 --> 00:17:23,858 I just want to get out of here. 311 00:17:26,863 --> 00:17:29,367 Okay, here's the police report. 312 00:17:29,367 --> 00:17:31,870 The cop's got lousy handwriting and his spelling's atrocious. 313 00:17:31,870 --> 00:17:34,375 So you might want to crack out your reading glasses. 314 00:17:39,382 --> 00:17:40,884 Another joy of middle age. 315 00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:51,902 This isn't what happened. 316 00:17:51,902 --> 00:17:52,903 What are you talking about? 317 00:17:54,906 --> 00:17:56,909 "The suspect unzipped his pants 318 00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:57,911 and exposed himself." 319 00:17:57,911 --> 00:17:59,914 God, I was peeing. 320 00:17:59,914 --> 00:18:02,418 "Suspect began masturbating his half-erect penis." 321 00:18:01,918 --> 00:18:02,920 I never did. 322 00:18:05,924 --> 00:18:07,928 "Suspect said, what are you into?" 323 00:18:07,928 --> 00:18:10,431 I never said that, the cop did. 324 00:18:10,431 --> 00:18:12,936 Okay, are you sure? 325 00:18:12,936 --> 00:18:15,439 Because sometimes you can play an incident 326 00:18:15,439 --> 00:18:17,442 over in your mind so many times, 327 00:18:17,442 --> 00:18:19,445 that you forget what really happened. 328 00:18:20,948 --> 00:18:21,949 I was there. 329 00:18:23,451 --> 00:18:25,955 I know. 330 00:18:25,955 --> 00:18:28,961 In the matter of "The People versus Victor Grassi", 331 00:18:28,961 --> 00:18:30,964 is counsel ready to enter a plea? 332 00:18:30,964 --> 00:18:31,965 Yes, your honour. 333 00:18:36,973 --> 00:18:37,974 We plead... 334 00:18:37,974 --> 00:18:39,977 Not guilty. 335 00:18:42,982 --> 00:18:43,983 It's okay. 336 00:18:43,983 --> 00:18:45,986 Thank you, God. 337 00:18:52,998 --> 00:18:54,500 You put me on that stand, 338 00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:58,006 I'll tell that whole courtroom how that fucking cop is lying. 339 00:18:58,506 --> 00:19:00,009 You're damn right you will. 340 00:19:00,009 --> 00:19:02,512 Only it'll just be your word against his. 341 00:19:02,512 --> 00:19:04,515 But I'll see what I can dig up. 342 00:19:08,021 --> 00:19:09,522 Sounds like this could get expensive. 343 00:19:09,522 --> 00:19:11,026 Oh, don't... no, no, don't worry. 344 00:19:11,026 --> 00:19:12,528 I'm taking this case pro bono. 345 00:19:12,528 --> 00:19:13,530 Bono? 346 00:19:14,031 --> 00:19:15,533 Like Sonny Bono? 347 00:19:15,533 --> 00:19:17,536 It means "for free", mother. 348 00:19:17,536 --> 00:19:19,038 Oh, no fucking way. 349 00:19:19,038 --> 00:19:20,540 Absolutely not. 350 00:19:20,540 --> 00:19:21,542 We insist on paying you. 351 00:19:21,542 --> 00:19:23,044 Oh, all right. 352 00:19:23,044 --> 00:19:25,047 All right, you can pay, in babysitting. 353 00:19:25,047 --> 00:19:27,050 and I'm not just talking watching him sleep. 354 00:19:27,050 --> 00:19:29,053 I'm talking changing his huggies, the works! 355 00:19:29,053 --> 00:19:31,056 Okay, we accept. 356 00:19:31,056 --> 00:19:34,062 And... and... and Justin can help. 357 00:19:34,062 --> 00:19:35,064 Right, Sunshine? 358 00:19:35,064 --> 00:19:36,565 Hmm? 359 00:19:36,565 --> 00:19:37,567 Sure. 360 00:19:44,077 --> 00:19:45,579 I'm glad you decided to fight, Vic. 361 00:19:57,598 --> 00:19:58,600 What's wrong with him? 362 00:19:59,101 --> 00:20:01,604 Brian's moving to New York. 363 00:20:01,604 --> 00:20:03,607 It's the end of the world as he knows it. 364 00:20:12,621 --> 00:20:14,624 Can I come in? 365 00:20:14,624 --> 00:20:16,127 It was your room first. 366 00:20:23,138 --> 00:20:25,141 He's not moving to New York. 367 00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:27,144 He's sure talking like he is. 368 00:20:27,644 --> 00:20:28,646 He flew this morning for an interview. 369 00:20:29,147 --> 00:20:31,650 Well, there's no harm in taking a meeting. 370 00:20:31,650 --> 00:20:35,156 Besides, I've known him a lot longer than you have. 371 00:20:35,156 --> 00:20:37,660 He may bitch and moan about Pittsburgh but... 372 00:20:38,162 --> 00:20:39,663 but there's no way he'd stop being top dog 373 00:20:40,165 --> 00:20:41,166 to be one of the pack. 374 00:20:41,166 --> 00:20:43,169 Then why's he putting his place up for sale? 375 00:20:44,671 --> 00:20:45,673 What? 376 00:20:47,175 --> 00:20:48,677 He called a real estate agent. 377 00:20:54,686 --> 00:20:56,189 We should stop him. 378 00:20:56,189 --> 00:20:58,192 Yeah, stop Brian. 379 00:20:58,192 --> 00:21:00,696 Right. Next we can take on Starbucks. 380 00:21:02,199 --> 00:21:04,202 Well, we can't just let him leave. 381 00:21:04,202 --> 00:21:05,704 We don't have a choice. 382 00:21:07,206 --> 00:21:09,210 Besides, everyone has the right to decide 383 00:21:09,210 --> 00:21:10,711 how they want to live their life. 384 00:21:13,216 --> 00:21:15,219 Look at you. 385 00:21:15,219 --> 00:21:18,223 You decided to leave home, and... 386 00:21:18,223 --> 00:21:20,227 I bet nothing could've changed your mind. 387 00:21:22,230 --> 00:21:23,232 It's the same with Brian. 388 00:21:26,736 --> 00:21:28,739 I love him, Michael. 389 00:21:28,739 --> 00:21:30,242 I know. 390 00:21:33,747 --> 00:21:35,750 All the more reason why you have to let him go. 391 00:21:37,753 --> 00:21:39,256 Just like that? 392 00:21:39,256 --> 00:21:41,259 Yeah, just like that. 393 00:21:43,263 --> 00:21:44,765 You must not care very much. 394 00:21:47,269 --> 00:21:49,772 I care more than you will ever know. 395 00:22:00,789 --> 00:22:01,790 Hello? 396 00:22:04,296 --> 00:22:05,797 Hi. Did I wake you? 397 00:22:08,302 --> 00:22:10,305 It's okay. 398 00:22:11,806 --> 00:22:13,809 What time is it there? 399 00:22:13,809 --> 00:22:17,315 Uh, I think it's around 10:30. 400 00:22:17,315 --> 00:22:20,320 It's three hours later here. 401 00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:22,323 Is everything okay? 402 00:22:22,323 --> 00:22:24,827 Everything's fine. 403 00:22:25,328 --> 00:22:26,830 Hank was really glad to see me. 404 00:22:28,833 --> 00:22:30,836 I knew it was a good idea you went. 405 00:22:32,339 --> 00:22:34,342 How you doing? 406 00:22:36,845 --> 00:22:38,848 I'm missing you. 407 00:22:38,848 --> 00:22:40,351 It's lonely in this bed. 408 00:22:41,853 --> 00:22:43,356 It's lonely here too. 409 00:22:43,356 --> 00:22:45,359 I was dreaming about you when you called. 410 00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:48,364 What was I doing? 411 00:22:48,364 --> 00:22:50,367 I'm not telling. 412 00:22:50,367 --> 00:22:51,369 Let me guess. 413 00:22:51,369 --> 00:22:52,870 I had the same dream. 414 00:22:54,373 --> 00:22:55,875 I was sucking your cock. 415 00:22:57,378 --> 00:22:58,379 Oh yeah? 416 00:22:58,379 --> 00:23:02,385 And it was... really... hard. 417 00:23:04,388 --> 00:23:05,390 What about you? 418 00:23:06,892 --> 00:23:08,896 Oh... 419 00:23:08,896 --> 00:23:11,400 I guess I was really hard too. 420 00:23:13,903 --> 00:23:15,406 That's just like my dream. 421 00:23:16,908 --> 00:23:19,912 You were rubbing your dick up against me, 422 00:23:19,912 --> 00:23:22,917 and I was asking you to put it inside me. 423 00:23:26,923 --> 00:23:28,425 You want me to put it inside you? 424 00:23:29,928 --> 00:23:30,930 Yeah. 425 00:23:32,433 --> 00:23:33,934 How much? 426 00:23:34,436 --> 00:23:34,936 A lot. 427 00:23:36,939 --> 00:23:37,940 Give it to me. 428 00:23:38,442 --> 00:23:39,943 Now? 429 00:23:43,949 --> 00:23:44,951 Okay. 430 00:23:47,455 --> 00:23:48,957 Please... 431 00:23:48,957 --> 00:23:50,460 I'm putting it inside you. 432 00:23:53,965 --> 00:23:54,967 Oh, God. 433 00:23:56,470 --> 00:23:57,471 Oh, yeah. 434 00:23:59,975 --> 00:24:00,976 I'm fucking you. 435 00:24:21,509 --> 00:24:24,012 So when the fuck did you plan on telling me? 436 00:24:24,012 --> 00:24:25,515 I would send you a change of address. 437 00:24:26,015 --> 00:24:27,518 Don't be a smart-ass. 438 00:24:27,518 --> 00:24:30,522 Look, they haven't even offered me the job yet, okay? 439 00:24:30,522 --> 00:24:32,525 You said they were knocked out by your resume 440 00:24:32,525 --> 00:24:34,529 and the interview went great. 441 00:24:34,529 --> 00:24:36,532 You wouldn't believe their offices, 442 00:24:36,532 --> 00:24:37,534 right on Madison Avenue, 443 00:24:38,034 --> 00:24:39,537 with this kick-ass view of midtown. 444 00:24:41,038 --> 00:24:43,543 And the guys at this agency, they're fucking smart... 445 00:24:45,546 --> 00:24:47,048 and they're totally hot. 446 00:24:47,549 --> 00:24:49,051 It's like an entirely different league. 447 00:24:51,054 --> 00:24:54,058 So you're just abandoning your son. 448 00:24:54,058 --> 00:24:56,062 Don't start in with the guilt shit, okay? 449 00:25:00,068 --> 00:25:01,571 Come here, Sonny boy. 450 00:25:02,071 --> 00:25:03,574 How would you like to hang out 451 00:25:03,574 --> 00:25:06,579 with your pop in Manhattan, hmm? 452 00:25:06,579 --> 00:25:08,080 Go to the Guggenheim 453 00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:09,082 and the opera. 454 00:25:12,086 --> 00:25:13,088 See, you're going to thank me for this 455 00:25:13,589 --> 00:25:15,091 when he grows up to be sophisticated. 456 00:25:15,091 --> 00:25:16,092 Fuck you, Brian. 457 00:25:16,092 --> 00:25:17,596 I know how to take my kid to a museum. 458 00:25:23,605 --> 00:25:24,607 Lindsay... 459 00:25:26,108 --> 00:25:28,111 if i stay here... 460 00:25:28,111 --> 00:25:30,616 I'm going to go out of my mind. 461 00:25:30,616 --> 00:25:32,118 I mean, who knows what I'll become? 462 00:25:32,118 --> 00:25:34,121 Probably who you are now, only older. 463 00:25:34,121 --> 00:25:35,122 No. 464 00:25:35,122 --> 00:25:37,125 What is wrong with that? 465 00:25:37,125 --> 00:25:38,628 It happens to all of us. 466 00:25:38,628 --> 00:25:39,630 Not me. 467 00:25:41,132 --> 00:25:42,635 I want to become something different. 468 00:25:43,135 --> 00:25:44,638 Something new. 469 00:25:44,638 --> 00:25:46,641 You sound like one of your ad campaigns. 470 00:25:46,641 --> 00:25:47,642 "New! Improved!" 471 00:25:49,144 --> 00:25:50,647 Going to New York won't change anything. 472 00:25:51,147 --> 00:25:53,150 So you'll have a different loft, 473 00:25:53,150 --> 00:25:54,152 work for a different firm, 474 00:25:54,152 --> 00:25:56,155 go to different bars and clubs. 475 00:25:56,155 --> 00:25:59,159 But different doesn't make it better. 476 00:25:59,159 --> 00:26:02,165 When are you going to figure out that Justin really loves you, 477 00:26:02,165 --> 00:26:03,668 Even if he is young? 478 00:26:04,168 --> 00:26:06,672 At your age, that's probably not such a bad thing. 479 00:26:06,672 --> 00:26:08,675 And Michael would give up his life for you. 480 00:26:12,180 --> 00:26:14,183 And I love you too. 481 00:26:14,183 --> 00:26:16,186 You think you'll find that on Madison Avenue? 482 00:26:31,210 --> 00:26:32,712 - Don't be nervous. - I'm not. 483 00:26:40,725 --> 00:26:42,226 I am. 484 00:26:49,739 --> 00:26:51,241 Hey, right on time. 485 00:26:51,241 --> 00:26:53,745 It's my Germanic predisposition to be punctual. 486 00:26:54,245 --> 00:26:56,248 Ooh, nice suit. 487 00:26:56,248 --> 00:26:57,751 Ted picked it out. 488 00:26:57,751 --> 00:27:00,254 And the shirt, and the tie. 489 00:27:00,254 --> 00:27:03,259 Well, it's also part of my Germanic predisposition 490 00:27:03,259 --> 00:27:05,263 to be overbearing and controlling. 491 00:27:05,263 --> 00:27:08,268 But it's important to make a good first impression. 492 00:27:08,268 --> 00:27:10,271 - I will. - Oh, and if they ask you 493 00:27:10,271 --> 00:27:11,773 why you left your last job, 494 00:27:11,773 --> 00:27:13,275 just say it wasn't challenging enough. 495 00:27:13,275 --> 00:27:14,778 I've already got an answer rehearsed. 496 00:27:14,778 --> 00:27:15,779 Oh, and for God's sake, 497 00:27:15,779 --> 00:27:17,782 don't say that you're a "people person". 498 00:27:17,782 --> 00:27:18,784 I hate that expression. 499 00:27:19,284 --> 00:27:20,787 I would never say that. Now would you guys 500 00:27:20,787 --> 00:27:23,791 stop worrying and just let me go in there and... 501 00:27:24,292 --> 00:27:26,295 impress the pants off them. 502 00:27:27,297 --> 00:27:30,803 Well, if anybody can do that, you can. 503 00:27:33,306 --> 00:27:37,312 Melanie says it'll be my word against his. 504 00:27:37,312 --> 00:27:38,815 So why should the jury listen to me? 505 00:27:38,815 --> 00:27:41,318 Because you're telling the truth. 506 00:27:41,318 --> 00:27:43,321 Christ, Vic, stop acting so guilty. 507 00:27:44,824 --> 00:27:45,826 Maybe I am... 508 00:27:47,327 --> 00:27:48,330 a little. 509 00:27:51,836 --> 00:27:53,839 I wanted to go with him. 510 00:27:53,839 --> 00:27:56,342 Since when is that a crime? 511 00:27:56,342 --> 00:27:58,345 When it's a cop. 512 00:27:58,345 --> 00:28:00,849 I can't believe I was foolish enough, 513 00:28:00,849 --> 00:28:02,351 at my age and with what I've got... 514 00:28:04,855 --> 00:28:07,359 to think someone could find me desirable? 515 00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:08,861 Talk about pathetic. 516 00:28:11,867 --> 00:28:14,370 You are not pathetic. 517 00:28:14,370 --> 00:28:16,875 And I will not hear you talk about yourself that way. 518 00:28:18,376 --> 00:28:19,378 Then don't listen. 519 00:28:20,881 --> 00:28:22,382 When I look in the mirror... 520 00:28:23,885 --> 00:28:25,888 I see someone I barely recognize. 521 00:28:28,893 --> 00:28:31,397 I still imagine I'm like Brian, 522 00:28:31,397 --> 00:28:32,900 able to walk in any bar 523 00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,904 and have almost anybody that I want. 524 00:28:35,904 --> 00:28:37,406 And I had plenty too. 525 00:28:38,909 --> 00:28:39,910 But now... 526 00:28:41,412 --> 00:28:45,418 Instead I see this... tired, 527 00:28:45,418 --> 00:28:48,423 somewhat faded... older man... 528 00:28:50,426 --> 00:28:52,429 who measures his life from a pill bottle... 529 00:28:53,932 --> 00:28:55,434 and who nobody wants. 530 00:29:00,943 --> 00:29:03,446 Do you know, I can't even remember 531 00:29:03,446 --> 00:29:04,949 the last time someone looked at me. 532 00:29:07,954 --> 00:29:08,955 Or touched me. 533 00:29:10,958 --> 00:29:12,460 It was probably that Filipino nurse 534 00:29:12,460 --> 00:29:14,464 who gave me that barium enema. 535 00:29:16,467 --> 00:29:17,468 That was a treat. 536 00:29:20,974 --> 00:29:23,979 So when this handsome young man expressed interest... 537 00:29:26,983 --> 00:29:29,487 I wanted to drop to my knees right there. 538 00:29:32,992 --> 00:29:33,994 That's the worst part. 539 00:29:36,498 --> 00:29:38,001 Worse than being arrested... 540 00:29:39,503 --> 00:29:40,504 or being put in jail... 541 00:29:43,008 --> 00:29:44,010 or having to go to court. 542 00:29:47,014 --> 00:29:48,016 It's that... 543 00:29:50,519 --> 00:29:51,521 I believed him. 544 00:30:13,055 --> 00:30:16,561 The things my tongue could do to his nipples. 545 00:30:16,561 --> 00:30:18,063 That is if I was single. 546 00:30:18,063 --> 00:30:20,568 Right there with you, 547 00:30:20,568 --> 00:30:22,070 only I'd go for his abs. 548 00:30:22,571 --> 00:30:24,574 I'd like to thank you boys for leaving me 549 00:30:24,574 --> 00:30:28,079 the most tender, delectable morsel. 550 00:30:28,079 --> 00:30:29,581 And now that Brian's finally out of the picture, 551 00:30:30,082 --> 00:30:31,584 I might actually stand a chance. 552 00:30:32,085 --> 00:30:33,587 You don't sound like you're gonna miss him. 553 00:30:33,587 --> 00:30:35,089 Mmm. 554 00:30:35,089 --> 00:30:37,594 I'm certainly not going to miss being told, "Be gone" 555 00:30:37,594 --> 00:30:39,095 every time some hunk appears. 556 00:30:39,095 --> 00:30:41,601 And I won't miss his little bons mots about my age. 557 00:30:42,101 --> 00:30:43,604 Although I did think his referring to you 558 00:30:43,604 --> 00:30:46,107 as "dead man walking" was kind of amusing. 559 00:30:46,107 --> 00:30:48,110 I said "kind of". 560 00:30:48,110 --> 00:30:50,113 Or knowing that you're always going to be his plan B. 561 00:30:50,113 --> 00:30:51,616 Or sometimes C. 562 00:30:52,116 --> 00:30:53,619 Well, I won't miss spending 300 bucks 563 00:30:53,619 --> 00:30:55,120 on a shirt from the Calvin Klein collection 564 00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:57,625 only to have everybody stare at Brian's bare chest. 565 00:30:57,625 --> 00:31:00,128 Or forced to wait outside a sex club in February 566 00:31:00,128 --> 00:31:01,631 'cause he needs a ride home. 567 00:31:01,631 --> 00:31:04,636 Yeah, I also won't miss how he never takes shit... 568 00:31:04,636 --> 00:31:07,140 - from anyone. - Or how he tells you the truth about yourself, 569 00:31:07,140 --> 00:31:08,642 even if it is a tad harsh. 570 00:31:10,645 --> 00:31:12,147 But you should probably hear it anyway. 571 00:31:12,648 --> 00:31:14,651 Or how he refuses to let you coast through your life. 572 00:31:16,153 --> 00:31:18,156 No, I'm not going to miss that one at all. 573 00:31:37,687 --> 00:31:39,189 This is disgusting! 574 00:31:39,189 --> 00:31:41,192 Really sick. 575 00:31:44,196 --> 00:31:46,702 What, are you looking at those hetero porn sites again? 576 00:31:46,702 --> 00:31:49,205 I told you, they're gonna warp your young mind. 577 00:31:49,205 --> 00:31:51,208 It's not porn. 578 00:31:51,208 --> 00:31:52,711 It's apartment rentals in New York. 579 00:31:53,211 --> 00:31:55,214 I can't believe what they're charging for this shit hole. 580 00:31:55,214 --> 00:31:58,219 Huh. You know with what they're going to be paying me, 581 00:31:58,219 --> 00:31:59,721 I can afford three times that? 582 00:32:01,223 --> 00:32:02,225 You mean this is cheap? 583 00:32:02,225 --> 00:32:03,727 Yup. 584 00:32:03,727 --> 00:32:04,729 New York's unreal. 585 00:32:05,730 --> 00:32:07,734 Yeah? 586 00:32:07,734 --> 00:32:10,739 Uh, Brian, it's, uh, Adam Lyons calling from, uh, Kennedy and Collins. 587 00:32:11,239 --> 00:32:12,742 Oh, hey. 588 00:32:12,742 --> 00:32:15,747 So I've been waiting to hear from you. What's the deal? 589 00:32:15,747 --> 00:32:17,248 Uh, the deal is... 590 00:32:19,251 --> 00:32:20,754 there is no deal. 591 00:32:21,254 --> 00:32:22,256 They decided to promote from within. 592 00:32:22,256 --> 00:32:25,260 Some 25-year old hotshot. 593 00:32:25,762 --> 00:32:28,266 Look... I'm really sorry. 594 00:32:28,266 --> 00:32:29,267 Uh... 595 00:32:31,270 --> 00:32:33,775 Don't worry, to tell you the truth, after weighing my options... 596 00:32:35,277 --> 00:32:38,281 I've decided to go with... someone else. 597 00:32:38,281 --> 00:32:40,785 Well then I don't feel so bad. 598 00:32:40,785 --> 00:32:44,290 So, hey, give me a call the next time you're in the city. 599 00:32:44,290 --> 00:32:45,793 I'd love to hook up again. 600 00:32:47,796 --> 00:32:50,300 Yeah... sure. 601 00:32:57,311 --> 00:32:59,815 You didn't tell me you were coming home tonight. 602 00:32:59,815 --> 00:33:00,315 Last-minute thing. 603 00:33:03,320 --> 00:33:04,823 Mmm, your face is cold. 604 00:33:06,324 --> 00:33:07,326 So, how'd it go? 605 00:33:07,326 --> 00:33:08,327 Well, I convinced Hank 606 00:33:08,829 --> 00:33:09,830 not to quit the hockey team. 607 00:33:09,830 --> 00:33:10,832 That's a start. 608 00:33:10,832 --> 00:33:13,837 And he's agreed to talk to a therapist. 609 00:33:13,837 --> 00:33:15,840 Well, see? I knew you could help him. 610 00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:17,843 But mostly we just sat around, 611 00:33:17,843 --> 00:33:19,345 ate pizza and watched ESPN. 612 00:33:19,846 --> 00:33:21,348 See, that's the important thing, you know. 613 00:33:21,348 --> 00:33:23,852 Not what you say or do, but just being there. 614 00:33:23,852 --> 00:33:25,354 That's why I gotta go back. 615 00:33:25,855 --> 00:33:26,857 Well, you should. We... 616 00:33:26,857 --> 00:33:28,359 maybe this summer we could take a trip... 617 00:33:28,359 --> 00:33:29,360 No, I was thinking sooner. 618 00:33:30,863 --> 00:33:31,864 How much sooner? 619 00:33:32,867 --> 00:33:33,868 Right away. 620 00:33:36,372 --> 00:33:37,874 Well, for how long? 621 00:33:37,874 --> 00:33:38,876 Well, I'm not sure. 622 00:33:38,876 --> 00:33:40,378 All I know is that he needs me 623 00:33:40,378 --> 00:33:41,880 and it's important that I'm there. 624 00:33:44,885 --> 00:33:46,888 Well, what about your practice, and your friends, 625 00:33:46,888 --> 00:33:48,891 and the house and...? 626 00:33:48,891 --> 00:33:51,896 I was thinking about that on the flight home. 627 00:33:51,896 --> 00:33:53,899 I could lease the house for a year. 628 00:33:53,899 --> 00:33:55,903 One of my colleagues could take over my practice 629 00:33:55,903 --> 00:33:57,906 Lori's got some friends who are doctors. 630 00:33:57,906 --> 00:33:59,909 They could provide me with referrals. 631 00:34:02,913 --> 00:34:05,918 So you've practically got this all figured out. 632 00:34:05,918 --> 00:34:07,921 Well, there is one thing that I don't know what to do with. 633 00:34:11,927 --> 00:34:14,430 Oh, um, well don't worry about me. 634 00:34:14,430 --> 00:34:15,934 I understand. 635 00:34:15,934 --> 00:34:17,937 Hank comes first. 636 00:34:17,937 --> 00:34:19,940 Oh, it's not a race, Michael. 637 00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:21,442 There's no "first". 638 00:34:23,445 --> 00:34:25,448 You're as important to me as he is. 639 00:34:27,952 --> 00:34:28,953 What I was hoping... 640 00:34:30,956 --> 00:34:33,460 is that you would come with me. 641 00:34:38,970 --> 00:34:40,471 This cop has lied before 642 00:34:40,471 --> 00:34:41,974 in at least four separate cases. 643 00:34:42,474 --> 00:34:43,476 You have proof of this? 644 00:34:43,476 --> 00:34:44,477 I looked up his records 645 00:34:44,477 --> 00:34:45,980 when he was with the Philadelphia P.D. 646 00:34:45,980 --> 00:34:48,483 In each instance he exaggerated, misconstrued 647 00:34:48,483 --> 00:34:50,988 or completely lied in his arrest reports 648 00:34:50,988 --> 00:34:52,489 resulting in the judge declaring a mistrial. 649 00:34:59,001 --> 00:35:01,004 - She's good. - She's great. 650 00:35:01,004 --> 00:35:05,010 Compared to her I feel so ignorant, so useless. 651 00:35:05,510 --> 00:35:06,512 You are. 652 00:35:08,014 --> 00:35:11,019 On the other hand, uh, she doesn't have your height 653 00:35:11,519 --> 00:35:14,023 or your ability to wear chartreuse in the daytime. 654 00:35:14,023 --> 00:35:15,525 So it all evens out. 655 00:35:15,525 --> 00:35:16,527 Shh! 656 00:35:16,527 --> 00:35:18,029 This is very compelling, 657 00:35:18,029 --> 00:35:19,531 but why would he do this? 658 00:35:19,531 --> 00:35:22,037 Seems he has a little problem with gay people. 659 00:35:22,037 --> 00:35:24,540 Look, we can save the court a lot of time and money. 660 00:35:24,540 --> 00:35:26,043 My client's innocent. 661 00:35:26,043 --> 00:35:27,044 He was entrapped by this officer, 662 00:35:27,544 --> 00:35:28,546 just like these other men. 663 00:35:28,546 --> 00:35:31,050 Is this true? 664 00:35:31,050 --> 00:35:33,053 I may have done a lot of things in my life, Sir... 665 00:35:35,056 --> 00:35:38,561 but I never exposed myself or enticed that officer. 666 00:35:38,561 --> 00:35:40,564 And even though I may not have much left, 667 00:35:40,564 --> 00:35:44,571 my health, my youth, my friends, 668 00:35:44,571 --> 00:35:46,074 I still have my name. 669 00:35:54,586 --> 00:35:55,588 And I will fight... 670 00:35:57,591 --> 00:35:58,592 to defend it. 671 00:36:01,096 --> 00:36:03,601 You're a very special lady, you know that? 672 00:36:04,102 --> 00:36:05,604 I miss you already. 673 00:36:07,607 --> 00:36:09,110 You just listen to the drum. 674 00:36:09,110 --> 00:36:10,111 The sound of my heart... 675 00:36:10,611 --> 00:36:12,614 you know what we need? 676 00:36:12,614 --> 00:36:15,619 A super humongous, woolly-mammoth size 677 00:36:15,619 --> 00:36:17,622 vat of buttered popcorn. 678 00:36:18,623 --> 00:36:20,126 One hit and you're high. 679 00:36:22,129 --> 00:36:23,631 That's pitiful. 680 00:36:23,631 --> 00:36:25,635 I am not high. 681 00:36:29,141 --> 00:36:30,643 Okay, maybe I am. 682 00:36:36,151 --> 00:36:38,655 That, um, mean old usher, 683 00:36:38,655 --> 00:36:40,658 who used to tell us to get our feet off the seats, 684 00:36:41,159 --> 00:36:42,160 still working here? 685 00:36:43,162 --> 00:36:44,664 Are you kidding? 686 00:36:44,664 --> 00:36:47,669 Probably a fucking maggot feast by now. 687 00:36:47,669 --> 00:36:52,176 Man, when I think of all the Saturday afternoons we spent here... 688 00:36:52,176 --> 00:36:53,678 Yeah, I used to buy a ticket 689 00:36:53,678 --> 00:36:55,681 and let you in that fire exit. 690 00:36:55,681 --> 00:36:57,684 Never got caught. 691 00:37:06,698 --> 00:37:10,205 This is where we saw "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom". 692 00:37:10,205 --> 00:37:12,708 And, uh, and "Ghostbusters". 693 00:37:12,708 --> 00:37:13,709 And, uh... 694 00:37:13,709 --> 00:37:15,712 - "The fly". - "The fly". 695 00:37:17,215 --> 00:37:19,218 I can't believe they're gonna tear it down. 696 00:37:19,218 --> 00:37:21,221 All those cheesy cineplexes. 697 00:37:23,224 --> 00:37:25,227 Yeah, they don't have any balconies to get stoned in. 698 00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:33,240 When this place is gone, 699 00:37:33,240 --> 00:37:34,742 a part of us'll be gone too. 700 00:37:38,748 --> 00:37:41,753 You get extremely maudlin when you're high. 701 00:37:44,257 --> 00:37:46,760 Well, this'll probably be... 702 00:37:46,760 --> 00:37:50,266 the last time you and I are ever here together. 703 00:37:50,266 --> 00:37:51,769 I mean, you'll be in New York. 704 00:37:56,276 --> 00:37:57,778 And you'll be in Portland. 705 00:38:00,282 --> 00:38:02,785 Opposite fucking ends of the universe. 706 00:38:02,785 --> 00:38:04,789 I didn't say I'd go. 707 00:38:05,290 --> 00:38:07,293 Well, you should. 708 00:38:07,293 --> 00:38:10,297 I'm not like you. I can't just wake up one morning 709 00:38:10,297 --> 00:38:12,300 and decide, boom, you know, it's time to move on. 710 00:38:13,803 --> 00:38:15,806 No looking back, no regrets. 711 00:38:18,310 --> 00:38:19,312 There's nothing for you here. 712 00:38:23,318 --> 00:38:25,321 It's my home. 713 00:38:25,321 --> 00:38:28,326 And even though it's not Paris or New York... 714 00:38:28,326 --> 00:38:29,327 No shit. 715 00:38:31,830 --> 00:38:33,333 I've lived here my entire life and... 716 00:38:35,837 --> 00:38:36,839 it's all I know. 717 00:38:36,839 --> 00:38:39,843 Well, maybe it's time to know something else, Michael. 718 00:38:39,843 --> 00:38:41,846 You're not 15 any more. 719 00:38:41,846 --> 00:38:42,848 I know. 720 00:38:45,352 --> 00:38:46,354 Go with David. 721 00:38:49,358 --> 00:38:50,360 Get the hell out of here. 722 00:39:09,389 --> 00:39:10,391 Hey. 723 00:39:12,394 --> 00:39:14,897 Tell me everything. 724 00:39:14,897 --> 00:39:16,400 It was great. 725 00:39:16,900 --> 00:39:18,904 They're really nice. 726 00:39:18,904 --> 00:39:20,907 And Melanie took me out for lunch. 727 00:39:24,413 --> 00:39:28,419 So, what about, uh, the guys? Any cute ones? 728 00:39:28,419 --> 00:39:29,921 One. 729 00:39:29,921 --> 00:39:31,924 But don't worry, he was married. 730 00:39:31,924 --> 00:39:33,927 - Okay, I'm... I'm not jealous. I'm just... - No. 731 00:39:33,927 --> 00:39:35,930 You know, I'm required to ask that question 732 00:39:35,930 --> 00:39:38,935 by the "Boyfriends in the Workplace Act" of, uh, 1991. 733 00:39:40,438 --> 00:39:42,942 And... they've already put me to work 734 00:39:43,443 --> 00:39:45,446 on this really interesting case. 735 00:39:47,949 --> 00:39:49,952 I am so proud of you. 736 00:39:55,461 --> 00:39:57,464 I'm kind of proud of myself. 737 00:39:59,467 --> 00:40:00,970 So... 738 00:40:01,471 --> 00:40:03,974 we will stay only a few minutes 739 00:40:03,974 --> 00:40:05,477 at the dinner, hmm? 740 00:40:05,477 --> 00:40:07,480 And then we shall come back... 741 00:40:08,982 --> 00:40:11,486 and consummate your return 742 00:40:11,486 --> 00:40:12,988 to white-collar respectability. 743 00:40:14,991 --> 00:40:16,494 Who says we have to wait till later? 744 00:40:17,995 --> 00:40:20,500 Why don't we take a shower? 745 00:40:20,500 --> 00:40:24,005 Together? 746 00:40:24,005 --> 00:40:25,508 I have never... 747 00:41:48,135 --> 00:41:49,138 You know, you ought to have a little more respect 748 00:41:49,639 --> 00:41:52,142 for your clothes, young man. 749 00:41:52,644 --> 00:41:55,648 You need to hang these things up before they wrinkle all over the place 750 00:41:55,648 --> 00:41:57,150 and I've got to send them out to cleaning... 751 00:42:13,175 --> 00:42:14,678 Are you coming? 752 00:42:21,688 --> 00:42:23,691 I said are you coming? 753 00:42:24,192 --> 00:42:24,693 Yeah. 754 00:42:29,199 --> 00:42:31,705 Uncle Vic. Uncle Vic. 755 00:42:34,208 --> 00:42:35,209 Long live the queen! 756 00:42:38,214 --> 00:42:40,217 Melanie's the one you should be congratulating. 757 00:42:40,217 --> 00:42:41,720 Oh, stop. 758 00:42:46,226 --> 00:42:48,730 - She got my case thrown out. - But you're the one 759 00:42:48,730 --> 00:42:50,232 who was so brave. 760 00:42:50,232 --> 00:42:51,735 You were an inspiration, 761 00:42:51,735 --> 00:42:53,739 the way you stood up for yourself. 762 00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:56,743 Well, after that terrible story you told me about that poor man, 763 00:42:56,743 --> 00:42:59,247 who was buried in an unmarked grave. 764 00:42:59,247 --> 00:43:00,749 What did you tell him? 765 00:43:01,250 --> 00:43:03,754 One of your Southern gothic horror stories? 766 00:43:03,754 --> 00:43:04,755 Mmm. 767 00:43:04,755 --> 00:43:06,758 You mean it wasn't true? 768 00:43:06,758 --> 00:43:08,260 All of my stories are true. 769 00:43:08,260 --> 00:43:09,763 Oh, Jesus. 770 00:43:09,763 --> 00:43:12,266 And if they're not, they... should be. 771 00:43:16,273 --> 00:43:18,276 He is so funny. 772 00:43:18,276 --> 00:43:19,278 I love him. 773 00:43:20,781 --> 00:43:22,282 Now remember what we said. 774 00:43:22,282 --> 00:43:24,787 We'll just stay here for a few minutes, 775 00:43:24,787 --> 00:43:26,790 Then we'll go home. 776 00:43:26,790 --> 00:43:27,791 Okay. 777 00:43:27,791 --> 00:43:28,793 Gotta go. 778 00:43:30,294 --> 00:43:31,296 - Ciao. - Bye, guys, take care. 779 00:43:31,797 --> 00:43:33,800 Bye. See you guys. 780 00:43:40,311 --> 00:43:42,815 Night, Em, I'll talk to you tomorrow. Deb, thanks. 781 00:43:51,327 --> 00:43:52,830 Bye. Congrats. 782 00:43:55,834 --> 00:43:57,837 Mel, I'll call you tomorrow about that thing? 783 00:44:08,855 --> 00:44:09,857 Night, Mikey. 784 00:44:14,363 --> 00:44:16,366 Will they want you to start right away? 785 00:44:16,366 --> 00:44:18,369 Those guys on Madison Avenue move fast. 786 00:44:18,369 --> 00:44:20,373 So do the ones in Chelsea. 787 00:44:20,373 --> 00:44:22,376 There'll be plenty of hearts to break in the Big City. 788 00:44:22,877 --> 00:44:25,381 Well, you don't have to break them all at once. 789 00:44:25,381 --> 00:44:27,384 And call every once in a while. 790 00:44:27,384 --> 00:44:28,385 Like that'll happen. 791 00:44:28,886 --> 00:44:29,888 Don't make us always have to call you. 792 00:44:29,888 --> 00:44:31,390 Why don't you all just shut the fuck up? 793 00:44:35,396 --> 00:44:36,397 I need a cigarette. 794 00:44:47,916 --> 00:44:48,416 Thanks. 795 00:44:58,933 --> 00:45:00,434 You're a lucky guy. 796 00:45:00,434 --> 00:45:01,937 I am? 797 00:45:01,937 --> 00:45:03,941 Everything you've got. 798 00:45:03,941 --> 00:45:06,946 All your friends and your family. 799 00:45:06,946 --> 00:45:07,947 Yeah, I know. 800 00:45:10,451 --> 00:45:11,953 If you decide to go with me, 801 00:45:11,953 --> 00:45:13,956 you know you'd be leaving a lot behind. 802 00:45:16,961 --> 00:45:19,965 It's a... it's a huge decision. 803 00:45:19,965 --> 00:45:22,469 Well, take your time, 804 00:45:22,469 --> 00:45:24,473 think about it. 805 00:45:24,974 --> 00:45:25,975 But if you decide not to go... 806 00:45:30,983 --> 00:45:32,485 I'll be very upset. 807 00:45:34,488 --> 00:45:35,991 But I'll understand. 808 00:45:44,003 --> 00:45:45,004 I've decided. 809 00:45:49,511 --> 00:45:51,514 I want to go. 810 00:45:54,019 --> 00:45:55,020 You're sure? 811 00:45:55,520 --> 00:45:57,020 No. 56207

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