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1
00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:03,539
Let's go over some of the equipment
you'll be needing to host the show this
2
00:00:03,540 --> 00:00:04,559
evening, Mr. Bond.
3
00:00:04,560 --> 00:00:09,520
Thank you, Bunsen, but I'm not really
James Bond. I'm just Pierce Brosnan.
4
00:00:09,860 --> 00:00:12,580
Oh, whatever you say, 007.
5
00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:13,850
Wink, wink.
6
00:00:14,040 --> 00:00:15,090
Now,
7
00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:19,490
this interesting little gizmo looks like
an ordinary microphone.
8
00:00:19,660 --> 00:00:21,740
A microphone, eh? And what does it do?
9
00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:25,570
Well, it amplifies your voice
electronically so the audience can hear
10
00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:26,770
I see.
11
00:00:26,780 --> 00:00:28,680
And I suppose this is the on button.
12
00:00:30,550 --> 00:00:33,990
No, that's the button that makes
Beaker's pants explode.
13
00:00:34,630 --> 00:00:36,070
Beaker, go change your pants.
14
00:00:36,290 --> 00:00:37,340
Come along.
15
00:00:37,390 --> 00:00:42,610
Yes. Over here, I'd like to show you
this. We call this our deadly alarm
16
00:00:42,890 --> 00:00:44,330
I see, and how does that work?
17
00:00:44,410 --> 00:00:48,749
Well, we put it in a great big slingshot
and fire it point blank at somebody's
18
00:00:48,750 --> 00:00:50,270
head. It really hurts.
19
00:00:50,530 --> 00:00:51,770
I bet it does, Bunsen.
20
00:00:51,990 --> 00:00:56,250
Oh, oh, hi there, Pierce. Hey, how's it
going, huh?
21
00:00:56,470 --> 00:00:58,700
Well, it's going great, Connor, except,
um...
22
00:00:58,701 --> 00:01:02,079
everyone's treating me like I'm James
Bond, and I'm not. I mean, that's just
23
00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:04,059
character I play in the movies. Oh,
yeah.
24
00:01:04,060 --> 00:01:08,160
You know, I mean, because in real life,
I'm not that suave or debonair at all.
25
00:01:09,780 --> 00:01:13,300
Now, where did I put that high -powered
laser of death cotton swab?
26
00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:14,570
What?
27
00:01:16,140 --> 00:01:19,100
Hey, this is the reason I moved out of
the Y.
28
00:01:21,620 --> 00:01:23,960
Well, I think I'll just go to make -up,
guys.
29
00:01:28,009 --> 00:01:31,379
It's Muppet Tonight with our very
special guest, R. Pierce Brosnan.
30
00:02:13,490 --> 00:02:20,449
And now, here's the host
31
00:02:20,450 --> 00:02:24,690
of our show, Clifford. Hey, what's up,
what's up?
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00:02:25,090 --> 00:02:27,290
Yeah, welcome to Muppets Tonight.
33
00:02:27,710 --> 00:02:31,810
They showed it can be seen everywhere
from Istanbul to Constantinople.
34
00:02:32,090 --> 00:02:35,940
Clifford, haven't you heard? Istanbul is
Constantinople. What do you mean?
35
00:02:37,270 --> 00:02:41,749
Istanbul was Constantinople. Now it's
Istanbul, not Constantinople. Been a
36
00:02:41,750 --> 00:02:42,800
time, time.
37
00:02:42,801 --> 00:02:45,309
Constantinople, why did Constantinople
need the works?
38
00:02:45,310 --> 00:02:48,870
That nobody did this, but the nerds.
39
00:02:49,510 --> 00:02:50,560
Me!
40
00:02:51,630 --> 00:02:55,430
Anywho, our special guest tonight is
none other than...
41
00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:04,750
Walk him right into the middle of that
circle thing.
42
00:03:05,780 --> 00:03:07,080
All right, where is he?
43
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,770
Stage door. Where's the stage door? This
is ridiculous.
44
00:03:11,940 --> 00:03:13,160
They all look the same.
45
00:03:16,260 --> 00:03:17,310
You again?
46
00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:22,820
You must be one sad and lonely man.
47
00:03:22,821 --> 00:03:26,999
Please don't give the wrong impression.
It's just one looking for the... Never
48
00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:28,050
mind.
49
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,540
Hey, man, get that thing off of me.
50
00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:41,299
Ladies and gentlemen, while we wait for
Pierce Brosnan, why don't we bring out
51
00:03:41,300 --> 00:03:42,299
another act?
52
00:03:42,300 --> 00:03:45,760
Excuse me while I see what we have in
our vast reservoir of talent.
53
00:03:46,340 --> 00:03:47,390
Later.
54
00:03:47,391 --> 00:03:51,939
Yo, Riz, Riz, Riz, what you got for me?
Well, I'm afraid our vast reservoir is
55
00:03:51,940 --> 00:03:55,599
more like a vast desert. All we got is
dancing grandmas. Oh, that doesn't sound
56
00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:58,970
good. Well, it's either that or Seymour
and Pepe doing German opera.
57
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:01,490
Hi there.
58
00:04:02,260 --> 00:04:03,310
I'm Kristen.
59
00:04:03,311 --> 00:04:04,159
I'm a Sody.
60
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:05,300
We do all the time.
61
00:04:05,900 --> 00:04:07,400
We both wear little horses.
62
00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:10,060
And go swimming up the Rhine. Ta -da!
63
00:04:10,061 --> 00:04:12,739
I'll go and introduce the grandmas.
64
00:04:12,740 --> 00:04:17,500
Yeah. Oh, I told you we should have done
sugar babies, okay?
65
00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:24,060
Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a big
Muppet welcome to the Dancing Grandma.
66
00:04:37,599 --> 00:04:40,760
Whoa, whoa, look at her shake that
thing.
67
00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:42,120
What thing is that?
68
00:04:42,860 --> 00:04:43,910
I don't remember.
69
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:54,300
Hey, Riz, those grandmas can sure bust a
move.
70
00:04:54,540 --> 00:04:56,710
Yeah, let's just hope they don't bust a
hip.
71
00:04:57,020 --> 00:04:58,740
Hey, hey, hey, Clifford, look.
72
00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:02,300
I finally got over my fear of standing
next to closed doors.
73
00:05:03,140 --> 00:05:07,580
If there are any naked bears in here,
please speak up now.
74
00:05:09,380 --> 00:05:12,120
Oh, very good. Hi, guys. Yo, yo, yo,
Pierce.
75
00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:13,490
Where you been, man?
76
00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:15,890
We need you for the spy in the casino
sketch.
77
00:05:15,891 --> 00:05:17,839
Oh, good, good, good. What does that
involve?
78
00:05:17,840 --> 00:05:21,279
You know, the usual, where the spy has a
fight theme, dances with beautiful
79
00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:26,360
women, and gets tortured and saves the
day. And what do I do?
80
00:05:26,730 --> 00:05:30,589
That is what you'll be doing, man. You
know, just like in your movies. But this
81
00:05:30,590 --> 00:05:34,049
is live television. I mean, in the
movies, we plan everything. We do it
82
00:05:34,050 --> 00:05:35,469
over again until we get it right.
83
00:05:35,470 --> 00:05:39,829
I mean, we have stuntmen and special
effects. We go to exotic locations like
84
00:05:39,830 --> 00:05:42,650
Istanbul and Constantinople.
85
00:05:44,030 --> 00:05:48,689
Every gal in Constantinople lives in
Istanbul, not Constantinople. So if
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00:05:48,690 --> 00:05:51,580
a date in Constantinople, you'll be
waiting in Istanbul.
87
00:05:54,350 --> 00:05:58,929
You know, Clifford, that annoying and
repetitive rat song has given me time to
88
00:05:58,930 --> 00:06:00,130
think. I'll do the sketch.
89
00:06:00,190 --> 00:06:03,849
Good! There's nothing like flying
without a net. It should be fun. Live
90
00:06:03,850 --> 00:06:06,470
television. Yeah. Getting it perfect the
first time.
91
00:06:06,471 --> 00:06:07,549
I'll be back.
92
00:06:07,550 --> 00:06:08,509
All right.
93
00:06:08,510 --> 00:06:09,560
Man, you all right?
94
00:06:10,110 --> 00:06:11,160
I'm all right.
95
00:06:11,190 --> 00:06:12,510
I'm all right. I'm all right.
96
00:06:17,050 --> 00:06:18,850
It's all right. Come on, Dave.
97
00:06:19,190 --> 00:06:20,240
Come to mama.
98
00:06:20,350 --> 00:06:21,750
Come on. Poor Black.
99
00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:23,290
You win again, sir.
100
00:06:23,540 --> 00:06:27,579
Luck is with me tonight. Thank you, sir.
Thank you indeed. Yes, have one
101
00:06:27,580 --> 00:06:30,280
yourself. Oh, ow, ow, ow, my eye, my
eye.
102
00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:32,130
Ah,
103
00:06:37,040 --> 00:06:39,700
champagne. No, no, no, wait, that's a
prop.
104
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:46,580
Thank you. Sorry, sorry about that.
105
00:06:47,500 --> 00:06:49,200
You're showing 18, sir.
106
00:06:52,650 --> 00:06:56,250
Oh, after your old tricks of playing
pinochle again, eh, Blowfish?
107
00:06:57,090 --> 00:06:59,110
It's Blackjack, you fool.
108
00:06:59,590 --> 00:07:03,470
Oh, you changed your name to Blackjack.
Very clever.
109
00:07:03,870 --> 00:07:06,570
I still recognize you. Oh, be quiet.
110
00:07:07,050 --> 00:07:09,450
I'm in the middle of an important
venture.
111
00:07:10,170 --> 00:07:13,910
I have 60 ,000 pounds riding on this
island.
112
00:07:14,350 --> 00:07:16,090
60 ,000 pounds, eh?
113
00:07:16,290 --> 00:07:20,749
That's nothing for an international
crook like you. Why, I've seen you bet
114
00:07:20,750 --> 00:07:23,830
more... Sorry.
115
00:07:24,930 --> 00:07:25,980
Sorry.
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00:07:26,990 --> 00:07:29,530
You idiot!
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00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:34,390
He's not exactly Fred Astaire. He's more
like Fred Falldown Astaire.
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00:07:37,860 --> 00:07:40,330
Even the laugh track didn't think that
was funny.
119
00:08:41,870 --> 00:08:43,678
Catch the bed.
120
00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:44,879
Cue the dancing grandma.
121
00:08:45,140 --> 00:08:46,820
Too late. We already put them to bed.
122
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:48,040
Then wake them up, man.
123
00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:50,940
Meantime, cue the Bay of Pigs watch,
Nigel.
124
00:08:52,580 --> 00:08:54,510
Cue the Bay of Pigs watch. Cue, cue,
cue.
125
00:08:55,860 --> 00:08:57,180
Bay of Pigs watch.
126
00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:01,680
Starring David Hogselhoff as Champ
Swimmer.
127
00:09:03,260 --> 00:09:05,320
Pamela Henderson as Pamela.
128
00:09:09,390 --> 00:09:12,390
Andy and Randy Pig as Donnie and Art C.
Schell.
129
00:09:14,681 --> 00:09:16,209
That
130
00:09:16,210 --> 00:09:31,149
was
131
00:09:31,150 --> 00:09:32,310
a swell song.
132
00:09:32,630 --> 00:09:34,980
Oh, well, would you like to hear it
backwards?
133
00:09:38,890 --> 00:09:43,710
Oh, it's Julius Strangepork,
Commissioner of Beach Safety and my
134
00:09:44,010 --> 00:09:47,330
Stand up straight. Yes, sir. Suck in
your gut. Slip one leg.
135
00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:50,040
Yeah, the hokey pokey. And turn yourself
around.
136
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:51,730
Oh, that's what it's all about.
137
00:09:52,110 --> 00:09:53,160
Oh, yeah.
138
00:09:53,590 --> 00:09:54,640
That's enough.
139
00:09:54,770 --> 00:09:55,820
Yes, sir.
140
00:09:55,830 --> 00:10:00,210
It has come to my attention that your
lifeguard license has expired.
141
00:10:00,839 --> 00:10:05,239
Why, that's impossible, sir. My level
-headed assistant lifeguards just
142
00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:06,860
it for me. Isn't that right, boys?
143
00:10:07,360 --> 00:10:10,700
Oh, oh, look, champ. Donnie caught a
goldfish with his head.
144
00:10:11,020 --> 00:10:12,840
Oh, nice fishing.
145
00:10:14,320 --> 00:10:15,370
Well,
146
00:10:15,680 --> 00:10:20,639
Schremer, obviously you must take the
test again or you can no longer be head
147
00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:25,620
lifeguard. Well, I'll do whatever it
takes to keep this cushy job.
148
00:10:25,860 --> 00:10:28,340
All right, the first test is
weightlifting.
149
00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:31,210
Piece of cake?
150
00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:35,860
No, maybe later. But first you have to
lift that 500 -pound barbell.
151
00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:37,410
What,
152
00:10:37,420 --> 00:10:38,880
500 pounds?
153
00:10:39,740 --> 00:10:42,820
Oh, well, okay.
154
00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:45,120
Well, dig this, Pamela.
155
00:10:52,100 --> 00:10:56,940
Very clever, Schremer. Now try it
without the fabulous bacon boys.
156
00:10:57,480 --> 00:10:59,680
Oh, all right, fellas, let it down.
157
00:10:59,980 --> 00:11:06,899
Okay, so... Well, since Champ has failed
the test and is completely
158
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:11,580
kaput, I've decided to make you the new
head lifeguard.
159
00:11:12,680 --> 00:11:15,760
Goodie, but I don't have a license
either.
160
00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:19,540
Yo, yo, yo, yo, you two, Donnie found
Champ's license.
161
00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:21,860
Whoa, whoa, whoa, where was it?
162
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:25,020
What? Inside the goldfish.
163
00:11:25,021 --> 00:11:30,989
It seems you're the head lifeguard
again, and there's only one thing left
164
00:11:30,990 --> 00:11:33,030
The hokey pokey?
165
00:11:38,671 --> 00:11:46,559
Welcome to Swift Wits, the fastest game
show on TV. I'm your host, Snooki Blyer,
166
00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:49,440
and here is today's contestant, Mr.
Arthur Modell.
167
00:11:49,441 --> 00:11:53,319
Arthur, I understand you have an
interesting story about the time you
168
00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:57,319
cruise with the Dalai Lama? Yes, thanks,
Snooki. You see, we were... Uh -huh,
169
00:11:57,320 --> 00:12:01,059
okay, Arthur. I said you had an
interesting story. I didn't say I wanted
170
00:12:01,060 --> 00:12:02,110
it. Sorry.
171
00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:05,770
Okay, let's see who you'll be playing
for today.
172
00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:08,360
It's kindly old Rufus the Hound.
173
00:12:11,590 --> 00:12:15,729
Answer correctly, and we'll make sure
Rufus gets all the medication he needs
174
00:12:15,730 --> 00:12:16,870
enjoy his golden years.
175
00:12:16,871 --> 00:12:20,689
If, however, you fail to answer the
question, old Rufus will be eaten alive
176
00:12:20,690 --> 00:12:21,830
Carl the Big Mean Bunny.
177
00:12:22,490 --> 00:12:29,289
Now, let's tell our audience the correct
answer. The answer is the Battle of
178
00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:31,570
Hastings. You have ten seconds, Arthur.
179
00:12:31,990 --> 00:12:33,040
Here are your clues.
180
00:12:33,450 --> 00:12:34,590
The Battle of Hastings.
181
00:12:36,810 --> 00:12:37,950
Oh, well, that's right.
182
00:12:37,951 --> 00:12:43,389
That's the first story I'm guessing
we've ever had in the history of this
183
00:12:43,390 --> 00:12:44,440
Oh, it's incredible.
184
00:12:44,441 --> 00:12:45,849
Congratulations, Arthur.
185
00:12:45,850 --> 00:12:50,149
Oh, thank you. And congratulations to
Rufus. Oh, I'm sorry, Carl. This is one
186
00:12:50,150 --> 00:12:51,610
guest you can't eat.
187
00:12:52,050 --> 00:12:53,100
That's what you say.
188
00:12:53,430 --> 00:12:56,790
Oh, oh, oh, oh. Hey, don't do that.
189
00:12:56,990 --> 00:12:58,040
No, no, no.
190
00:12:58,041 --> 00:12:59,509
Stop that.
191
00:12:59,510 --> 00:13:00,560
Carl, stop.
192
00:13:00,990 --> 00:13:02,870
Carl. Oh, oh.
193
00:13:11,050 --> 00:13:12,100
Cream and gold.
194
00:13:12,210 --> 00:13:13,260
Yeah, it's pretty.
195
00:13:13,390 --> 00:13:14,710
Here's the plan. Yeah, yeah.
196
00:13:14,711 --> 00:13:18,529
After we do our musical number, we take
over the studio and make our demands.
197
00:13:18,530 --> 00:13:19,990
Okay. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
198
00:13:20,370 --> 00:13:21,810
What are you guys doing here?
199
00:13:22,210 --> 00:13:25,910
We're the Rock Lobsters. We're here to
do our big Rock Lobster song on the
200
00:13:26,230 --> 00:13:28,760
Yeah, and then we're going to take over
the studio.
201
00:13:28,830 --> 00:13:31,330
Quiet. Wait a minute. What did he say?
202
00:13:31,730 --> 00:13:35,520
Nothing. He was talking about how bears
will believe anything you tell them.
203
00:13:36,750 --> 00:13:38,530
Yeah. You got that right.
204
00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:39,890
Have a good day, fellas.
205
00:13:41,050 --> 00:13:42,310
That was a close one.
206
00:13:42,311 --> 00:13:43,529
Well, hi there.
207
00:13:43,530 --> 00:13:47,429
What can I take you to? Knock off that
small -pox dumbo and take it to the
208
00:13:47,430 --> 00:13:48,480
table. All right.
209
00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:54,030
If you want my body and your chicken
shake.
210
00:13:54,590 --> 00:13:58,130
Oh, hey, Mr. Callahan. How you doing?
The usual, huh?
211
00:13:58,510 --> 00:14:03,610
No? Then let me try something on on you.
I call this the Polly Wallbanger.
212
00:14:04,690 --> 00:14:05,810
It's got a real...
213
00:14:07,870 --> 00:14:09,530
Ooh, the kick to it.
214
00:14:10,090 --> 00:14:12,330
Don't worry, Mr. C. Those stains will
come out.
215
00:14:13,910 --> 00:14:17,160
Clueless? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's in
the back. I'll call him out.
216
00:14:17,850 --> 00:14:18,900
Clueless?
217
00:14:19,190 --> 00:14:21,390
Thank you.
218
00:14:21,690 --> 00:14:23,510
Thank you. Oh, hi, Mr. Callahan.
219
00:14:23,890 --> 00:14:26,890
Oh, by the way, you've got a run in your
nylons there.
220
00:14:26,891 --> 00:14:30,389
Hey, Clueless? Yeah. What's this I hear
about you going back to school?
221
00:14:30,390 --> 00:14:32,310
Oh, yes, yes. I'm going to night school.
222
00:14:32,750 --> 00:14:33,800
Good for you.
223
00:14:33,910 --> 00:14:35,070
What are you studying?
224
00:14:35,450 --> 00:14:36,500
Uh, jousting.
225
00:14:36,850 --> 00:14:40,470
Jousting! I did it! Night school
jousting!
226
00:14:43,290 --> 00:14:49,750
You want to sing or should I hit you in
the head with this frying pan?
227
00:14:50,110 --> 00:14:51,990
Oh, um, I want to sing.
228
00:14:52,230 --> 00:14:53,280
Huh?
229
00:14:55,530 --> 00:15:02,369
Beautiful dreamer, wake on... I thought
you said I
230
00:15:02,370 --> 00:15:03,420
had a choice.
231
00:15:03,710 --> 00:15:04,760
I lied.
232
00:15:05,470 --> 00:15:08,990
You're right, Mr. Callahan.
233
00:15:09,330 --> 00:15:10,870
It's not nice to lie.
234
00:15:17,710 --> 00:15:18,760
Go,
235
00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:22,590
Granny.
236
00:15:24,110 --> 00:15:27,910
Go, Granny. Go, Granny. Go, Granny.
Clifford, Clifford, look.
237
00:15:28,130 --> 00:15:32,710
I got over my fear of holding way too
many pies next to a closed door.
238
00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:40,299
I've got great news. I just talked to
Pierce, and he wants to do an act that's
239
00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:43,919
filled with danger, excitement, and
things flying through the air. What is
240
00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:46,210
One of those action -adventure stunt
shows?
241
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:47,860
Oh, it's even better. Juggling.
242
00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:50,680
Juggling? Yeah, yeah. With Andy and
Randy Pig.
243
00:15:51,960 --> 00:15:53,010
Oh, yeah.
244
00:15:53,011 --> 00:15:58,419
Ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourselves
for the dazzling juggling artistry of
245
00:15:58,420 --> 00:16:00,380
Pierce Brosnan and Andy and Randy Pig.
246
00:16:08,470 --> 00:16:09,610
Mr. Bosnan!
247
00:16:09,930 --> 00:16:11,330
Where is he? I don't know.
248
00:16:11,710 --> 00:16:12,970
We're already out here!
249
00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:19,180
Sorry, fellas. Had to make a trip to the
little spy's room.
250
00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:20,950
Nerves, you know. Top secret stuff.
251
00:16:21,290 --> 00:16:23,750
Nancy and Clancy!
252
00:16:24,130 --> 00:16:26,490
Let's juggle! Let's juggle!
253
00:16:27,150 --> 00:16:28,390
Yes! Here we go!
254
00:16:28,650 --> 00:16:29,700
Here we go!
255
00:16:29,730 --> 00:16:30,850
Coming at you, Nancy!
256
00:16:31,270 --> 00:16:32,510
Coming at you, Clancy!
257
00:16:32,710 --> 00:16:33,760
Here we go!
258
00:16:33,761 --> 00:16:38,809
We should have found out what struggling
is. There you go. There you go. Coming
259
00:16:38,810 --> 00:16:39,409
at you.
260
00:16:39,410 --> 00:16:40,910
That's it. Don't lose interest.
261
00:16:41,210 --> 00:16:43,490
Why is he hitting us? I don't know.
262
00:16:43,750 --> 00:16:45,450
This job's too hard.
263
00:16:46,230 --> 00:16:51,409
I guess you've got to take the good with
the bad. Yeah, but I'm still waiting
264
00:16:51,410 --> 00:16:52,460
for the good.
265
00:16:52,630 --> 00:16:53,680
There.
266
00:16:55,550 --> 00:17:02,209
Ladies and gentlemen, before things
really fall apart... Here are the
267
00:17:02,210 --> 00:17:03,870
nautical but nice music...
268
00:17:12,419 --> 00:17:14,520
We were at the beach.
269
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:21,799
Everybody had matching towels. Somebody
went under a dock, and there they
270
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:22,960
saw a rock.
271
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,260
It wasn't a rock.
272
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:28,119
What the rock loved.
273
00:17:45,450 --> 00:17:46,530
Here comes a stingray.
274
00:17:47,550 --> 00:17:49,250
There goes a dogfish.
275
00:17:50,390 --> 00:17:51,910
Chased by a catfish.
276
00:17:52,990 --> 00:17:54,770
In through a sea robin.
277
00:17:55,810 --> 00:17:57,290
Watch out for that piranha.
278
00:17:58,410 --> 00:17:59,870
There goes a narwhal.
279
00:18:00,490 --> 00:18:03,330
Here comes a bikini whale.
280
00:18:06,490 --> 00:18:09,230
Look at those lobsters out there. Aren't
they cute?
281
00:18:09,231 --> 00:18:12,749
With their little lobster outfits, their
little lobster guitars, and their
282
00:18:12,750 --> 00:18:14,790
little lobster semi -automatic weapons.
283
00:18:16,330 --> 00:18:19,130
Keep that camera trained on me, or
she'll shoot you.
284
00:18:19,131 --> 00:18:21,689
That's right, you'll be sorry then. All
right, all right.
285
00:18:21,690 --> 00:18:23,010
Selfie to the world, unite.
286
00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:27,030
Yeah. We, the Trustation Liberation
Army, are taking over the Muppet
287
00:18:27,031 --> 00:18:31,029
Yeah, that's right. He's not going to
announce our plans for world domination.
288
00:18:31,030 --> 00:18:32,610
Yeah. We are on demand.
289
00:18:32,950 --> 00:18:37,710
First, from now on, when someone's in a
bad mood, no more calling them crabs.
290
00:18:37,711 --> 00:18:38,949
That's right.
291
00:18:38,950 --> 00:18:41,590
Second, when someone is short, no
more...
292
00:18:45,029 --> 00:18:46,570
Make it easy, Ed.
293
00:18:46,571 --> 00:18:47,809
I'm sorry.
294
00:18:47,810 --> 00:18:50,950
Third, no more movies based on old TV
shows.
295
00:18:51,230 --> 00:18:52,790
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right.
296
00:18:52,791 --> 00:18:55,169
Wait a minute, what's that got to do
with shellfish?
297
00:18:55,170 --> 00:18:57,400
Nothing. It's for the benefit of all
mankind.
298
00:18:57,401 --> 00:18:59,669
Well, you gotta agree with them on that
one.
299
00:18:59,670 --> 00:19:02,320
These guys look serious, Chief. What are
we gonna do?
300
00:19:02,790 --> 00:19:06,030
Clifford, I have an announcement to
make.
301
00:19:06,031 --> 00:19:09,449
I can't talk right now, Pierce. We're in
the middle of a crisis. Nevertheless, I
302
00:19:09,450 --> 00:19:13,870
came in here to make my apologies for
ruining your show and to...
303
00:19:14,410 --> 00:19:16,310
Tell everyone that I'm leaving.
304
00:19:17,450 --> 00:19:19,130
Yeah, well, later. Yeah, later. Bye.
305
00:19:21,530 --> 00:19:23,170
This, this, wait, don't go.
306
00:19:23,550 --> 00:19:25,270
No, you didn't ruin the show.
307
00:19:25,470 --> 00:19:29,610
I mean, the casino sketch and your
juggling act, they were hysterical.
308
00:19:30,010 --> 00:19:33,830
Really? You thought they were funny,
Fuzzy? Oh, yeah, they were fun.
309
00:19:34,429 --> 00:19:37,439
Yeah, and I'm no funny because I am a
professional comedian.
310
00:19:37,650 --> 00:19:41,490
Oh, thank you. And Vicky and I found it
scientifically entertaining.
311
00:19:41,930 --> 00:19:44,190
Remember, I am a professional scientist.
312
00:19:44,830 --> 00:19:49,269
This is true, this is true. Oh, guys,
you've made me feel so good. Thank you
313
00:19:49,270 --> 00:19:53,190
much. If there's anything I can do to
make this show better, I will do
314
00:19:54,430 --> 00:19:55,480
Anything?
315
00:19:55,481 --> 00:19:58,929
Well, maybe you can help us with these
armed lobsters that have taken over the
316
00:19:58,930 --> 00:20:00,170
studio. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
317
00:20:00,650 --> 00:20:01,730
Sooner said than done.
318
00:20:01,731 --> 00:20:04,479
Bunsen, you quickly go get those special
gadgets together.
319
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:07,400
Lovely. I'm off to slip into a clever
disguise.
320
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:08,890
Yes.
321
00:20:09,820 --> 00:20:11,060
Demand number 49.
322
00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:14,280
Istanbul should be changed to
Constantinople.
323
00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:16,540
So take me back.
324
00:20:17,180 --> 00:20:19,100
Constantinople, no, you can't go back.
325
00:20:19,220 --> 00:20:21,140
Constantinople, been a long time gone.
326
00:20:21,141 --> 00:20:23,819
Constantinople, why did Constantinople
get the works?
327
00:20:23,820 --> 00:20:26,110
That's nobody's business, but it hurts.
Hey!
328
00:20:26,380 --> 00:20:30,340
All right, so it wasn't a real demand. I
just wanted to hear that song again.
329
00:20:31,580 --> 00:20:36,319
Anyway, until all our demands are met,
we rule the airwaves. Yeah. We will
330
00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:38,440
control the entertainment on this show.
331
00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:41,760
Yeah. That's right. We will put on what
we want to see.
332
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,640
Yeah. Men, what do we want to see?
333
00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:47,490
You're kidding.
334
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:48,780
What? Are you sure?
335
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:55,180
Yeah. All right, then. We choose to put
on the Dancing Grandmas.
336
00:20:55,460 --> 00:20:56,510
Yeah.
337
00:21:03,820 --> 00:21:07,490
Boy, watching these grandmas has me
feeling something I haven't felt in
338
00:21:07,491 --> 00:21:08,559
What's that?
339
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:09,610
My pulse!
340
00:21:09,940 --> 00:21:16,519
All right, it's been five minutes and I
can see our demands are not going to be
341
00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:17,570
met.
342
00:21:17,620 --> 00:21:20,510
Agnes, when I get home, I don't want you
to say I told you so.
343
00:21:21,100 --> 00:21:24,860
Now, to show you how serious we are,
bring out the hostages.
344
00:21:24,861 --> 00:21:25,959
Oh, no!
345
00:21:25,960 --> 00:21:27,260
No, no!
346
00:21:29,120 --> 00:21:30,170
So,
347
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:34,029
how does it feel now that you're about
to be sacked? Sacrifice big shot
348
00:21:34,030 --> 00:21:35,930
capitalistic entertainers? Yeah.
349
00:21:36,730 --> 00:21:38,450
Let's hear you sing now.
350
00:21:38,990 --> 00:21:40,550
Yeah. Okay.
351
00:21:44,350 --> 00:21:49,170
I'm Seymour. I'm Pepe. We're two of a
kind. We're about to be sacrificed.
352
00:21:49,390 --> 00:21:51,430
And I've got a big behind.
353
00:21:51,431 --> 00:21:56,529
We only had a little more time to
prepare, okay? Yeah, yeah. Silence!
354
00:21:56,530 --> 00:21:58,450
Take them away before they sing again!
355
00:21:58,650 --> 00:22:01,910
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Hey,
who's the new kid?
356
00:22:02,250 --> 00:22:03,300
Her name's Prawn.
357
00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:05,539
James Prawn.
358
00:22:06,570 --> 00:22:08,290
Welcome to the car, Stretch.
359
00:22:08,950 --> 00:22:10,590
Careful, boss. It could be a trap.
360
00:22:10,810 --> 00:22:14,909
Hey, look, I'm a lobster. I know a trap
when I see one. A trap doesn't have
361
00:22:14,910 --> 00:22:16,110
catchy music cues.
362
00:22:16,570 --> 00:22:20,010
Okay, Prawn, you could kill him. No, no.
Wait a second, Tort.
363
00:22:20,230 --> 00:22:21,570
I want to kill him.
364
00:22:21,770 --> 00:22:24,600
No, no. Don't you think you're being a
little shellfish?
365
00:22:25,550 --> 00:22:27,850
I am a little shellfish. Huh?
366
00:22:28,270 --> 00:22:30,770
Oh, I get it. It's a pun.
367
00:22:31,030 --> 00:22:32,930
Oh. Wait a second.
368
00:22:34,020 --> 00:22:36,780
crustaceans don't make puns. Yeah,
you're no pun.
369
00:22:36,781 --> 00:22:38,119
Get him, boy.
370
00:22:38,120 --> 00:22:40,380
Okay, your time's up. This is it.
371
00:22:40,660 --> 00:22:41,710
All right.
372
00:22:41,780 --> 00:22:46,040
You have really... You have really
ticked me off now.
373
00:22:46,380 --> 00:22:47,680
Hey, look at Pierce go.
374
00:22:47,681 --> 00:22:51,279
Yeah. Boy, this sure would make a great
closing number. Yeah, if only we had
375
00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:52,239
some music.
376
00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:56,379
Out of the way, Johnny Piyama coming
through singing a cheap knockoff of a
377
00:22:56,380 --> 00:22:57,399
Bond song.
378
00:22:57,400 --> 00:22:58,660
That's enough there, Sal.
379
00:23:06,570 --> 00:23:07,890
Pierce Brosnan.
380
00:23:10,570 --> 00:23:15,910
He's the guy, the guy with the clocks
that fly.
381
00:23:17,690 --> 00:23:20,990
He just clocked that guy.
382
00:23:23,890 --> 00:23:27,230
Pierce Brosnan.
383
00:23:30,030 --> 00:23:32,590
Pierce Brosnan.
384
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:38,850
Pierce.
385
00:23:40,420 --> 00:23:41,470
Oh, oh.
386
00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:43,210
Well done.
387
00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:50,020
Yeah. Yo, Pierce, it was great having
you on the show. Thank you, Clifford,
388
00:23:50,120 --> 00:23:54,959
I mean, what can I say? I mean, doing
your show has reinvigorated me. I feel
389
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:56,939
if there's nothing I couldn't do now.
Really?
390
00:23:56,940 --> 00:23:58,280
What about fire eating?
391
00:23:58,500 --> 00:23:59,550
Sure. Why not?
392
00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:00,850
What?
393
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:02,690
What? Oh.
394
00:24:32,001 --> 00:24:38,989
Yo, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
395
00:24:38,990 --> 00:24:40,749
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
396
00:24:40,750 --> 00:24:41,569
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
397
00:24:41,570 --> 00:24:44,389
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
398
00:24:44,390 --> 00:24:50,190
Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz, Riz,
Riz, Riz,
399
00:24:50,210 --> 00:25:04,319
Riz,
400
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:05,480
Not tasting.
401
00:25:05,780 --> 00:25:06,860
Not tasting.
402
00:25:07,360 --> 00:25:11,760
Not tasting. I'll get the cocktail for
it. Thank you.
403
00:25:11,810 --> 00:25:16,360
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