Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:36,122 --> 00:00:37,776
♪ when you sing
2
00:00:40,039 --> 00:00:43,347
♪ of the joy
only love can bring ♪
3
00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:49,048
♪ heaven knows
4
00:00:50,876 --> 00:00:54,401
♪ it's in my heart
and my soul ♪
5
00:00:58,405 --> 00:01:00,973
♪ we're caught
in a world ♪
6
00:01:01,016 --> 00:01:02,192
♪ full of tears
7
00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:08,111
♪ so many sad times
and fears ♪
8
00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:11,810
♪ so while there's
a chance ♪
9
00:01:11,853 --> 00:01:13,377
♪ and you're near
10
00:01:13,420 --> 00:01:16,249
♪ well, let's dance
11
00:01:18,991 --> 00:01:20,688
♪ hey, hey
12
00:01:20,732 --> 00:01:22,299
♪ let's dance
13
00:01:24,301 --> 00:01:26,129
♪ ah, yeah
14
00:01:36,356 --> 00:01:38,445
♪ there's a world
15
00:01:40,534 --> 00:01:44,147
♪ far away
from the one you see ♪
16
00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:49,456
♪ there's a dream
17
00:01:51,458 --> 00:01:54,635
♪ I will never let go
18
00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:02,687
♪ and then
it's suddenly true ♪
19
00:02:03,949 --> 00:02:08,258
♪ this moment's for me
and for you ♪
20
00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:13,915
♪ so while there's not
a thing that we can do ♪
21
00:02:13,959 --> 00:02:16,701
♪ well, let's dance
22
00:02:19,138 --> 00:02:21,880
♪ ah, let's dance
23
00:02:25,710 --> 00:02:27,451
♪ let's dance
24
00:02:29,453 --> 00:02:31,237
♪ hey, hey ♪
25
00:02:31,281 --> 00:02:34,371
[toilet flushes]
26
00:02:43,162 --> 00:02:45,033
honey,
jiggle the handle.
27
00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:53,564
can't we
get that fixed?
28
00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:55,000
after
our down payment
29
00:02:55,043 --> 00:02:56,697
we've got
about $8.00 left.
30
00:02:56,741 --> 00:02:58,830
all right, then,
i'll jiggle.
31
00:03:01,398 --> 00:03:02,268
mark...
32
00:03:02,312 --> 00:03:03,269
mm-hmm?
33
00:03:03,313 --> 00:03:04,270
whoa, mark.
34
00:03:04,314 --> 00:03:06,794
we have to
go to work.
35
00:03:06,838 --> 00:03:07,882
i'm working.
36
00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:10,798
are you sure
you want to do this?
37
00:03:10,842 --> 00:03:12,235
i never realized
38
00:03:12,278 --> 00:03:15,238
living
in an apartment
was so inhibiting.
39
00:03:15,281 --> 00:03:17,805
all these walls
are ours.
40
00:03:17,849 --> 00:03:20,808
it makes me want
to go buy handcuffs.
41
00:03:20,852 --> 00:03:21,853
mmm.
42
00:03:23,289 --> 00:03:24,899
i love this house!
43
00:03:24,943 --> 00:03:27,250
i can't believe
we got in.
44
00:03:27,293 --> 00:03:29,904
it was only
a five-minute dip
in the market.
45
00:03:29,948 --> 00:03:32,255
and you were
right on top.
46
00:03:32,298 --> 00:03:34,213
know what I
want to do?
47
00:03:34,257 --> 00:03:35,519
what?
48
00:03:35,562 --> 00:03:37,738
buy one
of those big,
vulgar televisions.
49
00:03:37,782 --> 00:03:39,174
ooh, yeah.
50
00:03:39,218 --> 00:03:41,829
and those tacky
pink flamingos
for the lawn.
51
00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:43,178
are those deductible?
52
00:03:43,222 --> 00:03:46,269
we can deduct the shit
out of everything.
53
00:03:46,312 --> 00:03:49,272
oh, mark! Ooh!
54
00:03:49,315 --> 00:03:50,577
yeow!
55
00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:53,624
[grunting]
56
00:03:59,064 --> 00:04:00,021
oh, rats.
57
00:04:00,065 --> 00:04:01,327
what?
58
00:04:01,371 --> 00:04:03,851
these are all postmarked
three weeks ago.
59
00:04:03,895 --> 00:04:05,940
did you call
the post office?
60
00:04:05,984 --> 00:04:07,942
i called them,
I sent forms,
61
00:04:07,986 --> 00:04:10,945
i sacrificed
animals in front
of the mailbox.
62
00:04:10,989 --> 00:04:12,686
who do you know
in new jersey?
63
00:04:12,730 --> 00:04:13,687
let me see.
64
00:04:13,731 --> 00:04:14,993
an old girlfriend?
65
00:04:15,036 --> 00:04:16,124
could be.
66
00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:19,519
hey! It's
from my cousin fred.
67
00:04:19,563 --> 00:04:21,304
you never mentioned
a fred.
68
00:04:21,347 --> 00:04:24,176
sure I did--
Ever-ready freddy.
69
00:04:24,219 --> 00:04:26,265
he and his wife
70
00:04:26,309 --> 00:04:28,833
want to spend
their vacation
with us.
71
00:04:28,876 --> 00:04:30,313
that sounds fun. When?
72
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,054
today.
73
00:04:38,451 --> 00:04:41,236
are you sure
they wouldn't be
74
00:04:41,280 --> 00:04:42,281
more comfortable
in a hotel?
75
00:04:42,325 --> 00:04:43,326
jessie!
76
00:04:43,369 --> 00:04:45,937
it's just houseguests.
77
00:04:45,980 --> 00:04:47,330
it'll be fun.
78
00:04:48,940 --> 00:04:50,855
bye.
79
00:04:50,898 --> 00:04:52,857
i don't know, mark.
80
00:04:52,900 --> 00:04:55,207
it sounds like
a disaster to me.
81
00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,252
wes, we're talking
five days.
82
00:04:57,296 --> 00:04:59,254
chernobyl only took
five minutes,
83
00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:01,909
and it didn't
come in to l.a.x.
At rush hour.
84
00:05:01,953 --> 00:05:02,910
this isfamily.
85
00:05:02,954 --> 00:05:03,911
morning, peppi.
86
00:05:03,955 --> 00:05:04,912
good morning,
mark.
87
00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:05,913
the grindle meeting
started?
88
00:05:05,957 --> 00:05:06,914
just now.
89
00:05:06,958 --> 00:05:08,742
i give it
three minutes.
90
00:05:08,786 --> 00:05:10,178
what do you mean?
91
00:05:10,222 --> 00:05:11,571
martinson's
going to woof it.
92
00:05:11,615 --> 00:05:14,095
he busted his ass
on this.
93
00:05:14,139 --> 00:05:15,488
he's
asking everybody
94
00:05:15,532 --> 00:05:18,273
to turn to page six
in their prospectus.
95
00:05:18,317 --> 00:05:19,840
no. One minute.
96
00:05:19,884 --> 00:05:21,929
what's wrong
with page six?
97
00:05:21,973 --> 00:05:23,670
morning, lori.
Copy those, please.
98
00:05:23,714 --> 00:05:25,368
mark?
99
00:05:25,411 --> 00:05:27,282
he's suggesting
a major investment
in slaughter security.
100
00:05:27,326 --> 00:05:28,675
so?
101
00:05:28,719 --> 00:05:31,939
grindle caught
his second wife
in the merger mode
102
00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:33,941
with a slaughter
junior executive.
103
00:05:33,985 --> 00:05:35,290
bob, we can
work something out.
104
00:05:35,334 --> 00:05:36,379
we can explore--
105
00:05:36,422 --> 00:05:38,163
nobody explores
with my passbooks!
106
00:05:38,206 --> 00:05:39,904
bring around my car!
107
00:05:39,947 --> 00:05:40,905
bob, please.
108
00:05:40,948 --> 00:05:42,167
12% growth
with companies
109
00:05:42,210 --> 00:05:43,560
that don't sleep
with my wife--
110
00:05:43,603 --> 00:05:45,823
a simple thing
to ask!
111
00:05:45,866 --> 00:05:47,955
i can get you that,
mr. Grindle.
112
00:05:47,999 --> 00:05:48,956
who are you?
113
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:50,218
mark bannister, sir.
114
00:05:50,262 --> 00:05:51,872
he's one
of our brightest.
115
00:05:51,916 --> 00:05:53,308
martinson was
somewhat adventurous,
116
00:05:53,352 --> 00:05:56,529
but I guarantee
I can build you
a portfolio
117
00:05:56,573 --> 00:05:57,835
that's not only
conservative...
118
00:06:00,098 --> 00:06:01,229
but aggressive.
119
00:06:01,273 --> 00:06:04,058
you'll be earning
14% in 3 months.
120
00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:05,277
14?
121
00:06:07,845 --> 00:06:10,238
ok. Last chance.
122
00:06:10,282 --> 00:06:11,849
amaze me.
123
00:06:13,285 --> 00:06:15,809
i want
your suggestions
for a new portfolio
124
00:06:15,853 --> 00:06:17,855
on my desk
by closing--
125
00:06:19,900 --> 00:06:22,860
i can't believe
you're courting
bob grindle.
126
00:06:22,903 --> 00:06:24,209
i won't wind up
like martinson.
127
00:06:24,252 --> 00:06:25,776
and kroft
and gurvitz...
128
00:06:25,819 --> 00:06:27,995
i am in complete
control.
129
00:06:30,911 --> 00:06:33,218
jacob, do you want
a time-out?
130
00:06:33,261 --> 00:06:35,220
go wait
in the car.
131
00:06:35,263 --> 00:06:38,136
excuse me.
What's your secret
summer fantasy?
132
00:06:38,179 --> 00:06:39,267
chloroform.
133
00:06:39,311 --> 00:06:42,488
ooh! A date
with tom cruise.
134
00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:44,272
a date
with tom cruise.
135
00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:48,363
these space people
come down in
this big spaceship
136
00:06:48,407 --> 00:06:50,801
and eat
my mom and dad.
137
00:06:50,844 --> 00:06:52,803
what's your secret
summer fantasy?
138
00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:54,326
got a question,
los angeles?
139
00:06:54,369 --> 00:06:55,980
let me know.
I'll find the answer.
140
00:06:56,023 --> 00:06:57,285
karen?
141
00:06:57,329 --> 00:06:59,984
that was
jessica bannister,
our question girl.
142
00:07:00,027 --> 00:07:01,376
thanks, jessica.
143
00:07:01,420 --> 00:07:02,943
coming up next--
144
00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:06,077
some hot ideas
on how to stay cool.
145
00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:07,208
clear.
146
00:07:09,733 --> 00:07:10,777
whew!
147
00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:15,216
oh, jessie?
148
00:07:17,218 --> 00:07:19,220
hi, russell.
What's up?
149
00:07:21,875 --> 00:07:25,618
i'm thinking about
trying you out
on the 8:00 report.
150
00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,315
that's great!
151
00:07:27,359 --> 00:07:29,492
but it's
a harder news hour,
152
00:07:29,535 --> 00:07:31,581
so we'll have to
toughen your image.
153
00:07:31,624 --> 00:07:33,583
i can
work on that.
154
00:07:33,626 --> 00:07:35,672
uh, I'd like
to go over
155
00:07:35,715 --> 00:07:37,108
some
question arenas.
156
00:07:37,151 --> 00:07:38,326
what?
157
00:07:42,287 --> 00:07:44,289
i can't believe
I put off
russell fenn
158
00:07:44,332 --> 00:07:46,596
when he wanted
to discuss
my big break.
159
00:07:46,639 --> 00:07:48,293
i wanted to make
160
00:07:48,336 --> 00:07:49,599
the in-person
airport gesture.
161
00:07:49,642 --> 00:07:50,948
i know, honey.
It's ok.
162
00:07:50,991 --> 00:07:52,036
thank you.
163
00:07:52,079 --> 00:07:54,952
wait'll you
get a hold of this guy.
164
00:07:54,995 --> 00:07:57,215
girls used to hang
all over him.
165
00:07:57,258 --> 00:07:59,086
is that him?
166
00:07:59,130 --> 00:08:00,261
no.
167
00:08:04,352 --> 00:08:05,528
here's
a good-looking guy.
168
00:08:05,571 --> 00:08:07,225
is this him?
169
00:08:07,268 --> 00:08:08,487
no. He's too young.
170
00:08:08,531 --> 00:08:10,141
you look
that young.
171
00:08:10,184 --> 00:08:11,577
you do!
172
00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:12,752
well, thank you.
173
00:08:26,984 --> 00:08:28,159
fred?
174
00:08:28,202 --> 00:08:29,160
pudge.
175
00:08:29,203 --> 00:08:30,770
pudge?
176
00:08:32,903 --> 00:08:34,339
hi.
177
00:08:34,382 --> 00:08:35,949
ooh!
178
00:08:35,993 --> 00:08:38,343
god, it's great
to see you.
179
00:08:38,386 --> 00:08:40,650
we're here!
Terra firma.
180
00:08:40,693 --> 00:08:42,739
that's
my wife bernice.
181
00:08:42,782 --> 00:08:43,740
bernie.
182
00:08:43,783 --> 00:08:44,741
hello.
183
00:08:44,784 --> 00:08:46,220
hi. Oh,
we're family.
184
00:08:46,264 --> 00:08:48,396
I've heard
so much about you.
185
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:49,528
uh-oh.
186
00:08:49,572 --> 00:08:51,399
hi there.
I'm jessie.
187
00:08:51,443 --> 00:08:52,749
hi.
188
00:08:52,792 --> 00:08:56,143
she looks just
like a movie star,
doesn't she?
189
00:08:56,187 --> 00:08:57,231
much better.
190
00:08:57,275 --> 00:08:58,798
see, our tv's
on the blink--
191
00:08:58,842 --> 00:09:01,409
they don't
want to hear
about our tv.
192
00:09:01,453 --> 00:09:03,847
tell them
the big news.
193
00:09:03,890 --> 00:09:04,891
we're, uh...
194
00:09:04,935 --> 00:09:05,849
pregnant!
195
00:09:05,892 --> 00:09:07,851
that's great.
Congratulations.
196
00:09:07,894 --> 00:09:10,767
well, we do have
something to celebrate.
197
00:09:10,810 --> 00:09:12,769
the station
jessie works for
198
00:09:12,812 --> 00:09:14,422
is about to give her
a big promotion.
199
00:09:14,466 --> 00:09:16,642
and mark just got
a major assignment.
200
00:09:16,686 --> 00:09:19,427
i just got canned.
201
00:09:19,471 --> 00:09:21,604
let's get
the luggage.
202
00:09:21,647 --> 00:09:24,389
there's another one,
the decorative plaid.
203
00:09:24,432 --> 00:09:26,304
they were
out of zebra.
204
00:09:26,347 --> 00:09:27,697
it weighs a ton.
205
00:09:27,740 --> 00:09:29,263
what's in here,
bowling balls?
206
00:09:29,307 --> 00:09:31,788
uh, yeah.
207
00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:45,236
oh, yes. Wait.
208
00:09:45,279 --> 00:09:46,411
move everybody out.
209
00:09:46,454 --> 00:09:47,760
that's the one!
210
00:09:47,804 --> 00:09:49,109
move everybody out!
211
00:09:49,153 --> 00:09:50,545
baby, you made it.
212
00:09:50,589 --> 00:09:51,546
[meow]
213
00:09:51,590 --> 00:09:53,461
is you all right?
214
00:09:55,463 --> 00:09:56,551
come on.
215
00:09:56,595 --> 00:10:00,164
did your little ears
explode?
216
00:10:00,207 --> 00:10:02,862
fred, you didn't mention
anything about a pet.
217
00:10:02,906 --> 00:10:05,735
scruffy bannister,
meet your cousins,
218
00:10:05,778 --> 00:10:08,563
mark and jessie.
219
00:10:08,607 --> 00:10:09,869
whoa!
220
00:10:09,913 --> 00:10:10,914
oh!
221
00:10:10,957 --> 00:10:12,698
no, no. It's
an inexpensive dress.
222
00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:14,395
did he hurt you?
223
00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:15,745
no.
224
00:10:27,452 --> 00:10:30,716
is this
terrible heat
bothering you?
225
00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:33,371
you don't look
so good, baby.
226
00:10:33,414 --> 00:10:35,155
so, fred,
227
00:10:35,199 --> 00:10:37,070
what did you do
before getting
laid off?
228
00:10:37,114 --> 00:10:40,030
i worked in a sewage
treatment plant, pudge.
229
00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:42,119
the best part
about that
230
00:10:42,162 --> 00:10:44,382
was the goodies
that came
down the pipes.
231
00:10:44,425 --> 00:10:46,384
sounds, uh, great.
232
00:10:46,427 --> 00:10:50,475
yeah. One time
I found a genuine
snakeskin wallet
233
00:10:50,518 --> 00:10:52,172
with 80 bucks in it.
234
00:10:52,216 --> 00:10:55,741
i had to clean it up
a little.
235
00:10:55,785 --> 00:10:58,396
oh! I can't believe
this traffic.
236
00:10:58,439 --> 00:11:00,137
scruffy's going
to go on your carpet.
237
00:11:00,180 --> 00:11:02,705
don't let him
under our seat.
238
00:11:02,748 --> 00:11:03,923
he looks nauseous.
239
00:11:06,273 --> 00:11:08,232
what the hell?
240
00:11:08,275 --> 00:11:09,712
i'm sorry. Scruffy's
never been carsick.
241
00:11:09,755 --> 00:11:11,365
it's in my ear!
242
00:11:11,409 --> 00:11:13,411
look, the windows
are stuck--
243
00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:18,198
i can't believe
a cat's stomach
holds so much.
244
00:11:18,242 --> 00:11:19,722
a little club soda
245
00:11:19,765 --> 00:11:21,811
will take that
right out.
246
00:11:24,291 --> 00:11:25,945
go play.
247
00:11:28,818 --> 00:11:30,602
[meow]
248
00:11:33,387 --> 00:11:35,346
ooh, earth tones.
249
00:11:35,389 --> 00:11:38,218
hides the dirt.
250
00:11:38,262 --> 00:11:41,178
well, welcome to l.a.
251
00:11:41,221 --> 00:11:43,397
oh, oh, yeah. It's--
252
00:11:43,441 --> 00:11:45,660
what?
Oh, nothing.
253
00:11:45,704 --> 00:11:47,097
no, no, no. What?
254
00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:48,620
it's a little small.
255
00:11:48,663 --> 00:11:50,317
smaller
than we pictured.
256
00:11:50,361 --> 00:11:52,711
it's awfully small.
257
00:11:52,755 --> 00:11:53,799
come on.
258
00:11:53,843 --> 00:11:56,149
i'll show you your room.
259
00:11:56,193 --> 00:11:58,195
well, here we are.
260
00:12:04,462 --> 00:12:06,638
bernice, this ok?
261
00:12:06,681 --> 00:12:08,161
oh, sure. I mean,
262
00:12:08,205 --> 00:12:11,164
i don't mind sleeping
on a, uh...tofu...
263
00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:13,340
if the baby doesn't.
264
00:12:16,213 --> 00:12:19,520
i cannot believe you gave
them our bedroom, mark.
265
00:12:19,564 --> 00:12:21,522
our little haven
of privacy.
266
00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:22,915
i'm sorry.
267
00:12:22,959 --> 00:12:24,917
she is pregnant,
after all.
268
00:12:24,961 --> 00:12:27,920
it's obviously
been a little
rough on fred.
269
00:12:27,964 --> 00:12:30,357
maybe this
was a bad idea.
270
00:12:30,401 --> 00:12:32,925
that guy in
there's a wreck,
271
00:12:32,969 --> 00:12:34,361
like some
pod version
272
00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:37,234
of the fred
I grew up with.
273
00:12:37,277 --> 00:12:40,324
mark, it is only
for five days.
274
00:12:40,367 --> 00:12:41,455
that's right.
275
00:12:41,499 --> 00:12:43,153
they are trying
to be nice.
276
00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:45,242
fred gave us
these watches.
277
00:12:45,285 --> 00:12:47,244
how can
he afford cartiers?
278
00:12:47,287 --> 00:12:51,030
he just lost his job
fishing stuff
from the sewer.
279
00:13:00,126 --> 00:13:02,085
i'm sorry
we lost touch.
280
00:13:02,128 --> 00:13:03,086
hey!
281
00:13:03,129 --> 00:13:04,087
what?
282
00:13:04,130 --> 00:13:05,436
polar bear squad!
283
00:13:05,479 --> 00:13:06,437
oh, gee.
284
00:13:06,480 --> 00:13:08,265
ok, ready?
285
00:13:08,308 --> 00:13:10,920
brrr.brrr.
286
00:13:10,963 --> 00:13:12,704
grrr!grrr!
287
00:13:12,747 --> 00:13:15,272
ya ya ya.ya ya ya.
288
00:13:15,315 --> 00:13:16,273
oh.
289
00:13:16,316 --> 00:13:18,405
all right.
Camp redfern forever.
290
00:13:18,449 --> 00:13:20,016
ha ha ha!
291
00:13:25,804 --> 00:13:27,023
ok.
292
00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:32,593
what?
293
00:13:32,637 --> 00:13:34,204
oh.
294
00:13:34,247 --> 00:13:36,206
well, we're family,
right?
295
00:13:36,249 --> 00:13:39,296
i'm just going to come
on out and ask you.
296
00:13:39,339 --> 00:13:42,342
entre nous,
how much did it cost?
297
00:13:42,386 --> 00:13:43,517
what?
298
00:13:43,561 --> 00:13:46,390
come on. I saw
that nose in cosmo.
299
00:13:46,433 --> 00:13:50,350
i know you all do it
out here. That's fine.
300
00:13:50,394 --> 00:13:52,396
i didn't
have my nose done.
301
00:13:53,397 --> 00:13:55,312
sorry.
302
00:13:55,355 --> 00:13:58,271
you don't have to be
ashamed with me, hon.
303
00:13:58,315 --> 00:14:01,274
it's only the trained eye
of a beautician
304
00:14:01,318 --> 00:14:02,928
that can see that.
305
00:14:02,972 --> 00:14:05,931
there's this great guy
in trenton, Dr. Nick.
306
00:14:05,975 --> 00:14:08,151
I've considered
getting it done myself.
307
00:14:08,194 --> 00:14:12,198
maybe something to lift
my eyes up, show my teeth.
308
00:14:12,242 --> 00:14:14,853
cute. Excuse me
one second.
309
00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:16,899
my cousin
went to Dr. Nick.
310
00:14:16,942 --> 00:14:19,727
got a free set
of ginsu knives
311
00:14:19,771 --> 00:14:23,296
and her old nose
in a jar
of formaldehyde.
312
00:14:23,340 --> 00:14:26,299
i think I know
what's wrong
with fred.
313
00:14:26,343 --> 00:14:28,823
hey, pudge, remember
the o'boyski twins?
314
00:14:28,867 --> 00:14:31,217
mark, what is
this pudge deal?
315
00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:33,393
why do you
call him pudge?
316
00:14:33,437 --> 00:14:34,481
nothing.
317
00:14:34,525 --> 00:14:36,788
nothing.
318
00:14:38,094 --> 00:14:39,312
ha ha ha!
319
00:14:39,356 --> 00:14:40,966
[jessie]
is that you?
320
00:14:41,010 --> 00:14:42,620
oh, my god!
321
00:14:42,663 --> 00:14:44,274
hey, pudge.
322
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:47,016
horizontal
stripes! Ugh!
323
00:14:47,059 --> 00:14:48,800
which one
are you, fred?
324
00:14:48,843 --> 00:14:51,150
that's him blowing
the thing in my face.
325
00:14:51,194 --> 00:14:54,806
how many reels
of this stuff
did you bring, fred?
326
00:14:54,849 --> 00:14:56,808
a couple dozen.
327
00:14:56,851 --> 00:14:59,071
you're a barrel
of laughs!
328
00:15:01,769 --> 00:15:02,770
hey.
329
00:15:05,425 --> 00:15:07,340
i'm sorry, i, um--
330
00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:10,953
my god, did you ever
do anything but eat?
331
00:15:10,996 --> 00:15:12,476
well, apparently not.
332
00:15:12,519 --> 00:15:13,999
oh, he's touchy.
333
00:15:14,043 --> 00:15:17,394
when you told me
you were big
for your age,
334
00:15:17,437 --> 00:15:21,398
i thought you meant
you were tall!
335
00:15:22,529 --> 00:15:24,967
oh, god,
what are you doing?
336
00:15:25,010 --> 00:15:26,794
mark, you had breasts!
337
00:15:26,838 --> 00:15:28,883
oh, that's a game
we used to play--
338
00:15:28,927 --> 00:15:32,061
macy's
thanksgiving parade.
339
00:15:34,889 --> 00:15:37,022
yes!
340
00:15:37,066 --> 00:15:39,807
oh, ow. I'm having
labor movements.
Stop.
341
00:15:39,851 --> 00:15:42,941
i'm going to get something
to drink, all right?
342
00:15:42,985 --> 00:15:44,508
aah! Ha ha ha!
343
00:15:44,551 --> 00:15:47,990
oh, oh, please,
grab a snack
while you're there.
344
00:15:54,344 --> 00:15:55,519
[meow]
345
00:16:00,350 --> 00:16:01,612
[meow]
346
00:16:06,051 --> 00:16:08,010
[meow]
347
00:16:16,931 --> 00:16:18,455
aah!
348
00:16:24,156 --> 00:16:25,331
you're history!
349
00:16:28,073 --> 00:16:31,729
all right, strike three.
He's out of there.
350
00:16:31,772 --> 00:16:32,991
hey, pudge.
351
00:16:33,035 --> 00:16:36,168
haven't lost that old
pitching arm, huh?
352
00:16:36,212 --> 00:16:37,648
enough,
enough, enough.
353
00:16:37,691 --> 00:16:39,215
rise and shine,
lazybones!
354
00:16:39,258 --> 00:16:41,782
we got a big day
ahead of us.
355
00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:44,350
we do?
356
00:16:52,576 --> 00:16:54,273
hey, watch the vulva.
357
00:16:56,145 --> 00:16:57,929
it's not working.
358
00:16:57,972 --> 00:17:00,192
stop jiggling.
I'm kind
of gassy.
359
00:17:00,236 --> 00:17:02,151
no more.
I feel sick.
360
00:17:02,194 --> 00:17:03,282
oh, ah!
361
00:17:03,326 --> 00:17:04,196
ah!
362
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:05,589
aw.
363
00:17:05,632 --> 00:17:08,374
mmm. Graumann's chinese.
364
00:17:08,418 --> 00:17:10,289
I've always
wanted to eat here!
365
00:17:10,333 --> 00:17:11,421
joan crawford!
366
00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:14,293
she beat her kids
with a coat hanger.
367
00:17:14,337 --> 00:17:15,425
come on!
368
00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:16,774
mommy! Ahh!
369
00:17:16,817 --> 00:17:20,386
ow, fred! You're pressing
on my prenatal bloat!
370
00:17:23,737 --> 00:17:24,999
ahh.
371
00:17:26,262 --> 00:17:27,611
aah!
372
00:17:27,654 --> 00:17:29,613
come on, squeeze in.
373
00:17:29,656 --> 00:17:31,832
all right,
everybody say trick.
374
00:17:35,184 --> 00:17:37,708
hon, you got
the traveler's
checks?
375
00:17:37,751 --> 00:17:40,058
you put them
in your pocket
this morning.
376
00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,712
i watched you.
377
00:17:41,755 --> 00:17:43,714
i don't--
378
00:17:43,757 --> 00:17:45,716
did you call
the traveler's
check people?
379
00:17:45,759 --> 00:17:48,066
their machine said
they're on vacation.
380
00:17:48,110 --> 00:17:49,894
they'll be back
after labor day.
381
00:17:49,937 --> 00:17:51,722
i told him
not to buy them
382
00:17:51,765 --> 00:17:53,985
from some guy
in the k-mart
parking lot.
383
00:17:54,028 --> 00:17:55,639
good morning.
384
00:17:55,682 --> 00:17:56,640
good morning.
385
00:17:56,683 --> 00:17:57,902
good morning.
386
00:17:59,121 --> 00:18:01,384
what's this?
387
00:18:01,427 --> 00:18:04,517
jessie and I can't see
everything with you guys.
388
00:18:04,561 --> 00:18:06,693
you shouldn't miss
any hot spots.
389
00:18:06,737 --> 00:18:09,218
probably take you
the rest of your vacation
390
00:18:09,261 --> 00:18:10,741
just to see all that.
391
00:18:10,784 --> 00:18:13,222
jeez, there's lots
of great stuff on here,
392
00:18:13,265 --> 00:18:14,614
but we're broke.
393
00:18:16,790 --> 00:18:18,575
thanks anyway.
394
00:18:18,618 --> 00:18:19,706
here.
395
00:18:19,750 --> 00:18:21,186
no, no, no, mark.
396
00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:22,753
oh, fred, come on.
397
00:18:22,796 --> 00:18:24,058
fred...
398
00:18:24,102 --> 00:18:26,757
we'd rather
spend the rest
of our vacation
399
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:28,759
just sitting
right here.
400
00:18:28,802 --> 00:18:30,282
take my car.we insist.
401
00:18:39,987 --> 00:18:42,207
ah, yes.
402
00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:46,516
you know something?
That's the best $300
we ever invested.
403
00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:48,518
mark?hmm?
404
00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:51,216
when do your cousins
get back?
405
00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:53,131
not for several hours.
406
00:19:00,704 --> 00:19:02,053
[whistles]
407
00:19:23,857 --> 00:19:25,511
new fabric softener.
408
00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:02,287
[doorbell buzzes]
409
00:20:02,331 --> 00:20:03,680
oh, um...
410
00:20:03,723 --> 00:20:05,377
forget it.yes.
411
00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:08,728
woman: jessa?
412
00:20:08,772 --> 00:20:10,687
it's my sister!
413
00:20:10,730 --> 00:20:11,818
oh, no.
414
00:20:11,862 --> 00:20:12,776
it's my sister!
415
00:20:12,819 --> 00:20:15,692
honey, my blouse.
Hand me it.
416
00:20:15,735 --> 00:20:17,041
i'll get rid of her.
417
00:20:17,084 --> 00:20:18,042
the pants!
418
00:20:18,085 --> 00:20:19,304
[buzz]
419
00:20:19,348 --> 00:20:21,741
just tell her
we're not here.
420
00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:23,613
jessa!
421
00:20:23,656 --> 00:20:25,658
all right.
422
00:20:30,097 --> 00:20:31,621
claudia,
this isn't a good time.
423
00:20:31,664 --> 00:20:35,842
kaddir kicked me out!
424
00:20:35,886 --> 00:20:37,583
jessa!
425
00:20:46,375 --> 00:20:48,725
so then kaddir didn't
actually kick you out.
426
00:20:48,768 --> 00:20:50,335
that's a matter
of opinion.
427
00:20:50,379 --> 00:20:51,641
does he know
you're gone?
428
00:20:51,684 --> 00:20:53,077
he barely knows
i'm alive.
429
00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:54,644
he cut my allowance.
430
00:20:54,687 --> 00:20:56,515
he cut her
allowance, honey.
431
00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:58,300
to what,
9,o00 a month?
432
00:20:58,343 --> 00:21:00,693
makes me drive
his old jaguar.
433
00:21:00,737 --> 00:21:02,695
some people
have worse problems.
434
00:21:02,739 --> 00:21:03,696
[telephone rings]
435
00:21:03,740 --> 00:21:04,697
like who?
436
00:21:04,741 --> 00:21:06,351
people who
don't have cars.
437
00:21:06,395 --> 00:21:08,527
who cares
about them?
438
00:21:08,571 --> 00:21:10,703
hi, kaddir!
Yeah, salaam
back at you.
439
00:21:10,747 --> 00:21:12,314
he found
your note.
440
00:21:12,357 --> 00:21:13,706
i won't talk to him.
441
00:21:13,750 --> 00:21:14,881
right. She's...
442
00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:17,319
he wanted to know
if you were here.
443
00:21:17,362 --> 00:21:18,320
why?
444
00:21:18,363 --> 00:21:19,364
why?
445
00:21:19,408 --> 00:21:20,713
to let you know
446
00:21:20,757 --> 00:21:22,367
he canceled
your credit cards.
447
00:21:22,411 --> 00:21:24,369
what? That
middle-eastern
maggot!
448
00:21:24,413 --> 00:21:26,371
he wants
to talk to you.
449
00:21:26,415 --> 00:21:28,199
he can talk
to my lawyer!
450
00:21:28,242 --> 00:21:30,723
yes, she's very upset
about your love spat.
451
00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:32,377
right. I under--
Uh-huh.
452
00:21:32,421 --> 00:21:33,726
he says
he'll forget everything
453
00:21:33,770 --> 00:21:35,685
if you fix dinner
for him.
454
00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:38,731
grind some glass!turn down the tv!
455
00:21:38,775 --> 00:21:42,909
kaddir, she's
too grief-stricken.
Call her back.
456
00:21:42,953 --> 00:21:48,045
hello, kaddir. You listen.
I cannot live on that.
457
00:21:48,088 --> 00:21:50,352
i cannot live on that.
458
00:21:50,395 --> 00:21:52,397
do not speak farsi
to me, kaddir.
459
00:21:52,441 --> 00:21:54,094
stop it!
460
00:21:54,138 --> 00:21:56,401
that's it.
That is it!
461
00:21:56,445 --> 00:21:57,750
i want it.
462
00:21:57,794 --> 00:22:00,579
a duck for dinner.
A nice degas painting.
463
00:22:00,623 --> 00:22:02,059
i want--don't!
464
00:22:02,102 --> 00:22:03,669
a divorce.
465
00:22:09,675 --> 00:22:11,460
honey,
honey, wait.
466
00:22:11,503 --> 00:22:12,852
she said
the "d" word.
467
00:22:12,896 --> 00:22:14,506
she didn't
mean it.
468
00:22:14,550 --> 00:22:16,073
shit! She means it
every time.
469
00:22:16,116 --> 00:22:17,857
she's going
to a hotel.
470
00:22:17,901 --> 00:22:19,816
we're not
taking her in.
471
00:22:19,859 --> 00:22:21,818
if your
idiot cousins
can stay with us,
472
00:22:21,861 --> 00:22:23,820
we can take in
my sister
473
00:22:23,863 --> 00:22:26,388
who's been
thrown out
without a nickel.
474
00:22:26,431 --> 00:22:29,391
jessa, do you have
any goodscotch?
475
00:22:44,623 --> 00:22:46,233
put it over here.
476
00:22:47,452 --> 00:22:49,411
a little more
this way.
477
00:22:52,109 --> 00:22:55,460
a couple of days,
claudia. That's it.
478
00:22:55,504 --> 00:22:58,463
as if I wanted
to live in a garret.
479
00:22:58,507 --> 00:23:01,118
now, madam,
if you need
anything else,
480
00:23:01,161 --> 00:23:03,163
don't hesitate
to get it yourself.
481
00:23:03,207 --> 00:23:04,861
get out.
482
00:23:12,259 --> 00:23:14,174
ooh, I missed you.
483
00:23:16,655 --> 00:23:18,483
eee!
484
00:23:18,527 --> 00:23:20,267
mark?
485
00:23:20,311 --> 00:23:22,226
how anybody
with half a brain...
486
00:23:22,269 --> 00:23:23,488
eee!
487
00:23:23,532 --> 00:23:25,882
could drop
a whole day's
worth of film
488
00:23:25,925 --> 00:23:27,884
into the la brea
tar pits.
489
00:23:27,927 --> 00:23:28,885
eee, eee!
490
00:23:28,928 --> 00:23:29,886
stop beeping.
491
00:23:29,929 --> 00:23:31,322
shamu hits you once,
492
00:23:31,365 --> 00:23:32,889
you think
you're a porpoise.
493
00:23:35,282 --> 00:23:36,545
jessa?
494
00:23:36,588 --> 00:23:38,155
would you go ahead?
495
00:23:38,198 --> 00:23:40,505
i don't want to strain
my uterine wall.
496
00:23:40,549 --> 00:23:44,857
eee, eee, eee, eee!
497
00:23:44,901 --> 00:23:45,902
eee!
498
00:23:45,945 --> 00:23:48,687
aah!
499
00:23:48,731 --> 00:23:51,081
aah!
500
00:23:51,124 --> 00:23:54,127
fred, you'll break
my dragon!
501
00:23:54,171 --> 00:23:55,128
aah!
502
00:23:55,172 --> 00:23:56,390
aah!
503
00:23:56,434 --> 00:23:58,697
ohh!
504
00:23:58,741 --> 00:24:02,135
i didn't know
anybody's eyes
could be that red.
505
00:24:02,179 --> 00:24:05,748
what was
I supposed to think?
They looked insane.
506
00:24:05,791 --> 00:24:10,100
we're not insane.
We're from new jersey.
507
00:24:10,143 --> 00:24:12,058
yeah,
the garden state.
508
00:24:15,932 --> 00:24:18,151
ooh, deja vu.
509
00:24:18,195 --> 00:24:20,153
you two have
the same nose.
510
00:24:20,197 --> 00:24:23,983
they must have
had a two-for-one
special, huh?
511
00:24:24,027 --> 00:24:24,984
what?
512
00:24:25,028 --> 00:24:27,334
you know,
at the chop shop.
513
00:24:27,378 --> 00:24:30,599
i told that butcher not
to make it too perfect!
514
00:24:30,642 --> 00:24:32,601
he didn't make it
too perfect.
515
00:24:32,644 --> 00:24:34,603
she has
some bizarre
nose fetish.
516
00:24:34,646 --> 00:24:37,606
see, he left one nostril
bigger than the other.
517
00:24:37,649 --> 00:24:39,216
i had
a deviated septum.
518
00:24:39,259 --> 00:24:40,565
excuse me.
519
00:24:40,609 --> 00:24:43,046
i was thinking
maybe I can
interview you two
520
00:24:43,089 --> 00:24:46,702
for this new
budget beauty book
i'm trying to write.
521
00:24:46,745 --> 00:24:49,095
i'm calling it
pretty for peanuts.
Get it?
522
00:24:49,139 --> 00:24:51,271
play with the cat,
bernice.
523
00:24:51,315 --> 00:24:53,491
where is scruffy?
Scruffy bannister!
524
00:24:53,535 --> 00:24:55,058
he was
in the kitchen.
525
00:24:55,101 --> 00:24:56,494
it's too perky,
isn't it?
526
00:24:56,538 --> 00:24:58,061
no, it's perfect.
527
00:24:58,104 --> 00:25:03,457
aah!
528
00:25:17,254 --> 00:25:19,386
dear god...
529
00:25:19,430 --> 00:25:23,390
here lies the body
of scruffy bannister,
530
00:25:23,434 --> 00:25:26,132
our beloved companion.
531
00:25:26,176 --> 00:25:28,700
$42 worth
of angelfish.
532
00:25:28,744 --> 00:25:31,703
why don't we
just flush it
down the toilet?
533
00:25:31,747 --> 00:25:33,183
not our toilet.
534
00:25:35,185 --> 00:25:36,490
why?
535
00:25:36,534 --> 00:25:40,016
why do you always
take the good ones?
536
00:25:46,544 --> 00:25:49,634
sleep well,
little prince.
537
00:25:53,769 --> 00:25:56,075
[scratching]
538
00:25:58,730 --> 00:26:00,863
[crash]
539
00:26:00,906 --> 00:26:02,995
[glass breaks]
540
00:26:08,261 --> 00:26:10,089
[crash]
541
00:26:13,179 --> 00:26:14,311
mark.
542
00:26:14,354 --> 00:26:16,574
there's something
in there.
543
00:26:16,618 --> 00:26:18,228
mark.
544
00:26:18,271 --> 00:26:19,621
you asleep?
545
00:26:25,365 --> 00:26:26,758
god!
546
00:26:55,265 --> 00:26:56,701
[meow]
547
00:26:56,745 --> 00:26:59,443
aah!
548
00:26:59,486 --> 00:27:02,315
honey, honey, look!
A dead cat! He's alive!
549
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:03,882
you all right?
550
00:27:03,926 --> 00:27:05,231
[meow]
551
00:27:05,275 --> 00:27:07,103
he's not
in the bag anymore!
552
00:27:07,146 --> 00:27:09,018
i'm carrying an uzi!
553
00:27:11,498 --> 00:27:13,457
scruffy!
554
00:27:13,500 --> 00:27:15,198
oh, baby!
555
00:27:15,241 --> 00:27:17,548
it's a miracle.
556
00:27:17,591 --> 00:27:22,771
oh, mommy's so sorry
for burying you alive.
557
00:27:22,814 --> 00:27:24,729
yes, she is.
558
00:27:24,773 --> 00:27:27,732
pee-yoo! Is that you
or this kitchen?
559
00:27:31,257 --> 00:27:34,086
anthony, listen to me.
Forget tropicorp, ok?
560
00:27:34,130 --> 00:27:36,132
orange juice stock
isn't worth a shit
561
00:27:36,175 --> 00:27:37,742
after the cold
and flu season.
562
00:27:37,786 --> 00:27:39,788
colorado t & t's
coming down.
563
00:27:39,831 --> 00:27:42,138
buy 1,000 shares
once it hits bernice.
564
00:27:42,181 --> 00:27:43,139
yeah. What?
565
00:27:43,182 --> 00:27:45,141
i'm sorry.
Once it hits 99.
566
00:27:45,184 --> 00:27:46,403
thank you.
567
00:27:46,446 --> 00:27:48,622
uh, mark?
Stark wants
to see an update
568
00:27:48,666 --> 00:27:50,233
on the grindle
portfolio.
569
00:27:50,276 --> 00:27:51,843
oh, yes.
570
00:27:55,107 --> 00:27:56,456
wait a second, pal.
571
00:27:56,500 --> 00:27:57,675
what?
572
00:27:57,719 --> 00:27:58,981
you're shedding.
573
00:27:59,024 --> 00:28:00,983
oh, jesus!
It's felix the rat.
574
00:28:01,026 --> 00:28:03,072
i opened
a can of peaches.
575
00:28:03,115 --> 00:28:05,074
there was cat hair
inside it.
576
00:28:05,117 --> 00:28:06,858
I've been
coughing up
fur balls.
577
00:28:06,902 --> 00:28:10,122
so when do you get rid
of these people?
578
00:28:10,166 --> 00:28:11,123
today!
579
00:28:11,167 --> 00:28:12,864
give me another hug.
580
00:28:12,908 --> 00:28:14,300
when the baby comes,
581
00:28:14,344 --> 00:28:16,476
we'll have
to all come
visit you again.
582
00:28:16,520 --> 00:28:18,870
or pictures.
Pictures are worth
a thousand words.
583
00:28:18,914 --> 00:28:21,873
fred's going to
have a baby cam
during the birth,
584
00:28:21,917 --> 00:28:24,484
but I'm going
to cover up
my unmentionables.
585
00:28:24,528 --> 00:28:26,791
oh, please do.
Please, honey.
Bye-bye.
586
00:28:26,835 --> 00:28:29,359
hon,
I had so much fun.
587
00:28:29,402 --> 00:28:32,449
i know this wasn't easy
for you guys.
588
00:28:32,492 --> 00:28:33,580
oh, no. Come on.
589
00:28:33,624 --> 00:28:36,366
bernice can be
a little handful.
590
00:28:36,409 --> 00:28:39,369
you have to
visit us in jersey.
591
00:28:39,412 --> 00:28:40,631
we will.
592
00:28:40,674 --> 00:28:43,373
the turnpike's beautiful
in spring and fall.
593
00:28:43,416 --> 00:28:44,809
i can't think
of anything--
594
00:28:44,853 --> 00:28:47,464
hey, fred,
come say good-bye.
595
00:28:47,507 --> 00:28:49,466
you're going
to be late.
596
00:28:49,509 --> 00:28:50,728
you take care.
597
00:28:50,772 --> 00:28:51,773
aah!
598
00:28:55,994 --> 00:28:57,735
i'm on the ground.
599
00:28:57,779 --> 00:28:58,954
honey!
600
00:28:58,997 --> 00:29:00,390
don't touch me.
601
00:29:00,433 --> 00:29:02,044
don't move
your head.
602
00:29:02,087 --> 00:29:03,785
honey,
you all right?
603
00:29:03,828 --> 00:29:06,396
see if anything
fell out.
604
00:29:06,439 --> 00:29:08,180
i'm going
to have a flat baby.
605
00:29:08,224 --> 00:29:10,661
i'm going to
call my doctor.
606
00:29:10,704 --> 00:29:11,880
no l.a. Quacks.
607
00:29:11,923 --> 00:29:14,665
i need my real doctor.
Call Dr. Jack penix.
608
00:29:14,708 --> 00:29:15,884
yeah. Right.
609
00:29:15,927 --> 00:29:17,450
oh, my god!
610
00:29:17,494 --> 00:29:18,800
oh, my god!
611
00:29:18,843 --> 00:29:20,802
i feel
the zygote
splitting.
612
00:29:20,845 --> 00:29:22,499
i don't
want twins!
613
00:29:23,500 --> 00:29:24,849
trenton, new jersey.
614
00:29:24,893 --> 00:29:26,808
for a Dr. Jack penix.
615
00:29:26,851 --> 00:29:28,766
with an "x."
616
00:29:28,810 --> 00:29:29,767
stop it!
617
00:29:29,811 --> 00:29:31,203
it's not
my foot.
618
00:29:31,247 --> 00:29:32,639
don't touch me.
619
00:29:32,683 --> 00:29:34,641
get away.
Where you going?
620
00:29:34,685 --> 00:29:35,729
yes?
621
00:29:35,773 --> 00:29:38,036
he said to get her
to the nearest bed
622
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,256
as quickly
as possible.
623
00:29:41,257 --> 00:29:43,476
ok. That's fine.
624
00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:45,609
it isn't fine.
She has to stay here.
625
00:29:45,652 --> 00:29:47,437
yes, of course,
she'll stay here.
626
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:49,439
how long?
627
00:29:49,482 --> 00:29:51,615
for the rest
of her pregnancy.
628
00:29:51,658 --> 00:29:52,834
ow!
629
00:29:53,835 --> 00:29:55,358
easy, easy,
easy, easy.
630
00:29:55,401 --> 00:29:56,359
oh, god!
631
00:29:56,402 --> 00:29:57,316
oh, god!
632
00:29:57,360 --> 00:30:00,319
i lost all feeling
in my womb.
633
00:30:00,363 --> 00:30:03,105
how am I supposed
to stay like this
634
00:30:03,148 --> 00:30:05,411
for six months?
635
00:30:05,455 --> 00:30:07,805
this is just stupid.
I'm getting my doctor.
636
00:30:07,849 --> 00:30:09,067
no! Never.
637
00:30:09,111 --> 00:30:11,678
i need a man of science,
not some ass-lifter.
638
00:30:11,722 --> 00:30:13,985
whatever we do
has to be real cheap.
639
00:30:14,029 --> 00:30:15,987
since I lost my job,
no...
640
00:30:17,554 --> 00:30:18,685
medical coverage.
641
00:30:27,433 --> 00:30:28,695
hi, Mr. Bannister.
642
00:30:28,739 --> 00:30:30,219
want to bounce?
643
00:30:30,262 --> 00:30:31,611
no, katy.
There are laws.
644
00:30:31,655 --> 00:30:33,787
how many times
did I tell you
645
00:30:33,831 --> 00:30:36,268
not to play
with dolls?
646
00:30:36,312 --> 00:30:38,009
dale.
647
00:30:38,053 --> 00:30:39,924
what's the problem--
Espresso machine down?
648
00:30:39,968 --> 00:30:41,883
no. No, no.
649
00:30:41,926 --> 00:30:44,015
more artichoke leaves
down your disposal?
650
00:30:44,059 --> 00:30:45,147
no.
651
00:30:45,190 --> 00:30:48,150
what's the problem?
652
00:30:48,193 --> 00:30:49,151
aah!
653
00:30:49,194 --> 00:30:50,587
how's that,
all right?
654
00:30:50,630 --> 00:30:51,980
lower, you ape!
655
00:30:52,023 --> 00:30:53,590
don't get excited, honey.
656
00:30:53,633 --> 00:30:56,593
guess what?
I got my first period today.
657
00:30:57,811 --> 00:30:59,683
that oughta do her.
658
00:30:59,726 --> 00:31:01,032
no thanks
necessary.
659
00:31:01,076 --> 00:31:03,034
name the bugger
after me.
660
00:31:03,078 --> 00:31:04,775
yeah, sluggo bannister.
661
00:31:04,818 --> 00:31:05,863
right.
662
00:31:07,691 --> 00:31:10,650
i feel like a human
swing set here.
663
00:31:10,694 --> 00:31:12,304
don't
touch that. Aah!
664
00:31:12,348 --> 00:31:15,655
i could drywall her
into your basement.
665
00:31:15,699 --> 00:31:18,702
i'll keep that
in mind, dale.
666
00:31:24,316 --> 00:31:26,623
we never should
have come, pudge.
667
00:31:26,666 --> 00:31:28,581
fred, stop talking
like that.
668
00:31:28,625 --> 00:31:31,106
also, please,
do me a favor.
669
00:31:31,149 --> 00:31:33,108
don't call me pudge
anymore.
670
00:31:33,151 --> 00:31:34,152
ok.
671
00:31:35,762 --> 00:31:37,068
stretch.
672
00:31:37,112 --> 00:31:38,287
look at you.
673
00:31:38,330 --> 00:31:39,810
you're living
the life.
674
00:31:39,853 --> 00:31:41,812
you got
a nice house,
675
00:31:41,855 --> 00:31:43,118
you paid too much--
676
00:31:43,161 --> 00:31:44,815
it's still
very nice.
677
00:31:44,858 --> 00:31:47,731
the real estate market
has gone crazy out here.
678
00:31:47,774 --> 00:31:49,646
you're important
at your office.
679
00:31:51,082 --> 00:31:52,997
and you got
a wonderful wife.
680
00:31:54,042 --> 00:31:55,173
yeah.
681
00:31:58,350 --> 00:31:59,873
to wonderful wives.
682
00:32:02,615 --> 00:32:04,530
bernice is
giving me cancer.
683
00:32:06,750 --> 00:32:09,274
stop talking like that.
Listen to yourself.
684
00:32:09,318 --> 00:32:11,624
you let that woman
walk all over you.
685
00:32:11,668 --> 00:32:14,279
you got to
stand up to her.
686
00:32:14,323 --> 00:32:17,065
what happened
to the fred I knew
in high school--
687
00:32:17,108 --> 00:32:20,459
the fred who could have
any girl in the senior class,
688
00:32:20,503 --> 00:32:22,026
when he was
a freshman,
689
00:32:22,070 --> 00:32:26,291
a guy who could break up
any class without trying?
690
00:32:27,771 --> 00:32:29,642
i don't know.
691
00:32:29,686 --> 00:32:31,557
somewhere
between graduation
692
00:32:31,601 --> 00:32:33,864
and the jerry lewis
telethon...
693
00:32:35,344 --> 00:32:36,780
i just lost it.
694
00:32:38,608 --> 00:32:41,089
♪ the kind of love
that we once shared... ♪
695
00:32:43,221 --> 00:32:44,222
hear that?
696
00:32:45,658 --> 00:32:46,616
bernadette.
697
00:32:46,659 --> 00:32:47,617
remember her?
698
00:32:47,660 --> 00:32:49,619
what was
her last name?
699
00:32:49,662 --> 00:32:51,360
um...
Bernadette moizecracken.
700
00:32:51,403 --> 00:32:53,623
her father owned
a battery shop.
701
00:32:53,666 --> 00:32:54,624
beverly.
702
00:32:54,667 --> 00:32:56,365
bernadette.
Don't you remember?
703
00:32:56,408 --> 00:32:57,453
beverly.
704
00:32:57,496 --> 00:32:58,628
we did
the choreography.
705
00:32:58,671 --> 00:33:00,369
you built
a dance routine,
706
00:33:00,412 --> 00:33:02,414
started it
in gym class.
707
00:33:02,458 --> 00:33:03,807
it started like this--
708
00:33:03,850 --> 00:33:05,287
the pelvis
thrusting thing.
709
00:33:05,330 --> 00:33:07,202
show me
how it's done.
710
00:33:07,245 --> 00:33:08,768
you thought it up.
711
00:33:08,812 --> 00:33:11,728
get your hemorrhoids
off the bar stool,
712
00:33:11,771 --> 00:33:13,860
show me how it's done.
713
00:33:14,861 --> 00:33:15,862
♪ bernadette...
714
00:33:16,863 --> 00:33:17,821
hey!
715
00:33:17,864 --> 00:33:18,865
come on.
716
00:33:23,783 --> 00:33:25,220
yeah!
717
00:33:25,263 --> 00:33:28,745
get it in.
Get it tight.
Get it greasy.
718
00:33:30,877 --> 00:33:33,663
♪ oh
719
00:33:35,665 --> 00:33:36,796
all right.
Come on.
720
00:33:38,059 --> 00:33:41,845
♪ but, darling,
you belong to me ♪
721
00:33:41,888 --> 00:33:43,586
♪ I tell the world
722
00:33:43,629 --> 00:33:46,415
♪ you're part of me
723
00:33:46,458 --> 00:33:47,894
♪ bernadette
724
00:33:51,681 --> 00:33:53,074
♪ in you I have
725
00:33:53,117 --> 00:33:56,033
♪ what other men long for
726
00:33:56,077 --> 00:33:59,950
♪ all men need someone
to worship and adore ♪
727
00:33:59,993 --> 00:34:02,039
♪ that's why
I treasure you ♪
728
00:34:02,083 --> 00:34:04,607
♪ and place you
high above ♪
729
00:34:04,650 --> 00:34:08,567
♪ for the only joy in life
is to be loved ♪
730
00:34:08,611 --> 00:34:12,745
♪ so, whatever you do,
bernadette ♪
731
00:34:12,789 --> 00:34:15,313
♪ keep on lovin' me
732
00:34:15,357 --> 00:34:17,315
♪ bernadette
733
00:34:17,359 --> 00:34:19,752
♪ keep on needin' me
734
00:34:19,796 --> 00:34:21,885
♪ bernadette...
735
00:34:21,928 --> 00:34:24,670
clear for takeoff.
736
00:34:27,630 --> 00:34:29,022
♪ bernadette
737
00:34:29,066 --> 00:34:30,720
♪ bernadette
738
00:34:30,763 --> 00:34:32,983
♪ you're the soul of me
739
00:34:33,026 --> 00:34:34,637
♪ you're the dream
740
00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:37,466
♪ you're the prayer
to me ♪
741
00:34:37,509 --> 00:34:39,032
♪ and bernadette
742
00:34:39,076 --> 00:34:41,644
♪ you mean more to me
743
00:34:41,687 --> 00:34:45,430
♪ than a woman was ever
meant to be ♪♪
744
00:34:46,953 --> 00:34:47,911
ha ha ha!
745
00:34:47,954 --> 00:34:48,868
little rusty.
746
00:34:48,912 --> 00:34:51,349
took me awhile
to get going.
747
00:34:51,393 --> 00:34:53,917
what you have,
you don't lose.
748
00:34:56,702 --> 00:34:58,748
way to go.
749
00:35:03,056 --> 00:35:04,580
jessie!
750
00:35:04,623 --> 00:35:06,190
what?he's gone.
751
00:35:06,234 --> 00:35:08,714
who's gone?fred's gone!
752
00:35:08,758 --> 00:35:11,369
I've been
abandoned.
753
00:35:11,413 --> 00:35:12,370
no, wait.
754
00:35:12,414 --> 00:35:14,633
we don't know that
for sure.
755
00:35:14,677 --> 00:35:16,069
"i went to find
756
00:35:16,113 --> 00:35:19,072
the fred bannister
I used to be."
757
00:35:19,116 --> 00:35:20,813
where did he
get that crap?
758
00:35:26,254 --> 00:35:27,342
fred!
759
00:35:29,996 --> 00:35:31,824
fred!
760
00:35:39,658 --> 00:35:44,794
[echoing]
fred! Fred!
761
00:35:44,837 --> 00:35:46,752
what did you tell him?
762
00:35:46,796 --> 00:35:48,232
i didn't tell him
anything.
763
00:35:48,276 --> 00:35:51,235
i said he should
stand up for himself.
764
00:35:51,279 --> 00:35:53,585
you saw
what a wreck he was.
765
00:35:53,629 --> 00:35:55,152
he was her wreck.
766
00:35:55,196 --> 00:35:57,720
she liked him
like that.
767
00:35:57,763 --> 00:36:00,070
she craves
human sacrifice,
and he was it.
768
00:36:00,113 --> 00:36:01,811
let's just
call the police.
769
00:36:01,854 --> 00:36:04,814
a guy leaves his wife.
They'll rush over.
770
00:36:04,857 --> 00:36:06,250
let's hire a detective.
771
00:36:06,294 --> 00:36:07,817
we can't afford that.
772
00:36:07,860 --> 00:36:09,645
maybe claudia
can watch bernice
773
00:36:09,688 --> 00:36:11,255
while we're at work.
774
00:36:11,299 --> 00:36:14,171
your sister would smother
the woman in her sleep.
775
00:36:19,307 --> 00:36:20,699
mark! Oh, mark!
776
00:36:20,743 --> 00:36:24,399
how the hell am I
supposed to pee?
777
00:36:36,411 --> 00:36:38,848
you deal with
your evil twin.
778
00:36:42,721 --> 00:36:44,419
don't make me do this.
779
00:36:44,462 --> 00:36:47,073
wouldn't you,
just this once,
780
00:36:47,117 --> 00:36:49,641
like to
handle something
like an adult?
781
00:36:49,685 --> 00:36:51,643
no.
782
00:36:51,687 --> 00:36:53,036
pouting
makes wrinkles.
783
00:36:53,079 --> 00:36:54,603
jessa, please.
784
00:36:54,646 --> 00:36:57,040
by the end
of the week,
785
00:36:57,083 --> 00:36:59,564
he'll be
on his knees begging.
786
00:37:08,181 --> 00:37:11,620
that gate was not here
yesterday.
787
00:37:11,663 --> 00:37:13,317
neither was
slaughter security.
788
00:37:17,887 --> 00:37:19,802
kaddir,
this is jessie.
789
00:37:19,845 --> 00:37:22,631
i know
you can hear me.
790
00:37:22,674 --> 00:37:25,286
it took a lot
for claudia to come here
791
00:37:25,329 --> 00:37:27,636
and try and
work this out.
792
00:37:27,679 --> 00:37:29,638
she deserves
a little credit.
793
00:37:29,681 --> 00:37:32,205
[speaking farsi]
794
00:37:32,249 --> 00:37:36,122
that's the last thing
in the world she needs.
795
00:37:36,166 --> 00:37:37,559
she bleeds me dry.
796
00:37:37,602 --> 00:37:38,777
you want
to see blood?
797
00:37:38,821 --> 00:37:40,779
let me in, I'll
slash your throat.
798
00:37:40,823 --> 00:37:43,608
try to come in,
i'll sell you
to bedouins.
799
00:37:43,652 --> 00:37:44,696
that's it.
800
00:37:44,740 --> 00:37:47,525
don't you
choke my cherub.
801
00:37:47,569 --> 00:37:48,700
kaddir,
claudia loves you.
802
00:37:48,744 --> 00:37:50,093
i do not!
803
00:37:50,136 --> 00:37:51,181
you do, too.
804
00:37:55,838 --> 00:37:59,015
i think you can see
hydrolux is a real comer.
805
00:37:59,058 --> 00:38:00,495
they're young,
806
00:38:00,538 --> 00:38:02,323
but they've got
the trust of
the state department,
807
00:38:02,366 --> 00:38:05,587
and they've just acquired
a major contract
from the navy.
808
00:38:05,630 --> 00:38:08,633
i'd like to make them
the cornerstone
of your new portfolio.
809
00:38:08,677 --> 00:38:10,461
navy, huh?
810
00:38:10,505 --> 00:38:12,507
i was a swabbie
once myself.
811
00:38:12,550 --> 00:38:15,031
no?
812
00:38:15,074 --> 00:38:16,685
excuse me, mark.
813
00:38:16,728 --> 00:38:18,600
line two's for you.i'll call back.
814
00:38:18,643 --> 00:38:20,689
i think you
ought to take this.
815
00:38:20,732 --> 00:38:22,821
she says
it's an emergency.
816
00:38:22,865 --> 00:38:24,040
oh.
817
00:38:24,083 --> 00:38:25,650
excuse me.
818
00:38:26,956 --> 00:38:28,479
hello.
819
00:38:28,523 --> 00:38:29,828
bernice, what--
820
00:38:29,872 --> 00:38:34,050
i don't know what time
wheel of fortuneis on.
821
00:38:34,093 --> 00:38:37,009
i left the tv guide
on the dresser.
822
00:38:37,053 --> 00:38:40,404
yes, I realize
you're in chains.
823
00:38:40,448 --> 00:38:42,363
could you
please just try--
824
00:38:42,406 --> 00:38:43,625
good-bye.
825
00:38:44,974 --> 00:38:46,584
sorry.
826
00:38:46,628 --> 00:38:47,672
that was
an emergency?
827
00:38:47,716 --> 00:38:49,326
well, yes, actually.
828
00:38:49,370 --> 00:38:52,590
in some warped,
alternate universe.
829
00:39:03,775 --> 00:39:05,995
bernice: not so fast, missy!
830
00:39:06,038 --> 00:39:09,172
it's time
to shift my butt!
831
00:39:18,747 --> 00:39:21,010
zoom, zoom, zoom.
832
00:39:21,053 --> 00:39:22,054
aah!
833
00:39:24,056 --> 00:39:25,493
mark!
834
00:39:30,802 --> 00:39:31,760
ow!
835
00:39:31,803 --> 00:39:33,588
mark!
836
00:39:33,631 --> 00:39:35,503
jessie!
837
00:39:40,116 --> 00:39:41,683
move to the right.
838
00:39:41,726 --> 00:39:43,336
you're blowing
my coiffure
839
00:39:43,380 --> 00:39:44,773
all over the place.
840
00:39:44,816 --> 00:39:48,777
oh, look! A bust
of my pussy!
841
00:39:48,820 --> 00:39:51,736
it's so majestic.
I gotta have it.
842
00:39:52,824 --> 00:39:54,304
an iced tea.
843
00:39:54,347 --> 00:39:55,784
with lemon.
844
00:39:55,827 --> 00:39:58,134
in a nice glass.
845
00:39:58,177 --> 00:39:59,135
stemware!
846
00:39:59,178 --> 00:40:02,704
[water drips]
847
00:40:02,747 --> 00:40:06,185
jiggle the handle.
848
00:40:06,229 --> 00:40:07,709
how do you handle stress?
849
00:40:07,752 --> 00:40:10,363
take a fistful
of valium.
850
00:40:10,407 --> 00:40:11,408
i get drunk.
851
00:40:11,452 --> 00:40:13,802
real drunk.
852
00:40:13,845 --> 00:40:15,804
polka!
Polka!
853
00:40:15,847 --> 00:40:17,240
bust somebody...
854
00:40:17,283 --> 00:40:18,284
anybody.
855
00:40:19,416 --> 00:40:20,809
pump iron.
856
00:40:20,852 --> 00:40:23,376
meditation.
857
00:40:23,420 --> 00:40:25,291
sex.
858
00:40:25,335 --> 00:40:26,597
excuse me, sir.
859
00:40:26,641 --> 00:40:28,773
wait a second.
No camera.
860
00:40:28,817 --> 00:40:30,601
we're from
channel 12 news.
861
00:40:30,645 --> 00:40:33,648
we're doing a survey.
How do you handle stress?
862
00:40:33,691 --> 00:40:35,345
usually i, uh...
863
00:40:35,388 --> 00:40:37,347
find the source
of the stress
864
00:40:37,390 --> 00:40:39,958
and break his legs.
865
00:40:41,873 --> 00:40:42,918
how much--
866
00:40:42,961 --> 00:40:45,529
how much does
something like cost?
867
00:40:45,573 --> 00:40:46,835
it all depends
868
00:40:46,878 --> 00:40:48,750
on how much stress
is involved.
869
00:40:48,793 --> 00:40:50,099
usually about $200.
870
00:40:50,142 --> 00:40:52,580
what could
you get for 100?
871
00:40:52,623 --> 00:40:53,581
100?
872
00:40:53,624 --> 00:40:55,278
a kneecap
or something.
873
00:40:55,321 --> 00:40:56,801
200 is usually
the rate.
874
00:40:56,845 --> 00:40:58,411
what if
that's your budget?
875
00:40:58,455 --> 00:40:59,848
what could you get?
876
00:40:59,891 --> 00:41:01,850
if you're having
money problems,
877
00:41:01,893 --> 00:41:04,156
you could do
something like this.
878
00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:06,245
i also produce
independent films.
879
00:41:06,289 --> 00:41:08,552
i couldn't do
anything like that.
880
00:41:08,596 --> 00:41:10,641
you got a good look.
881
00:41:10,685 --> 00:41:13,252
this could be
a beautiful thing.
882
00:41:13,296 --> 00:41:14,253
ok, thanks.
883
00:41:14,297 --> 00:41:16,560
you know where
to find me.
884
00:41:16,604 --> 00:41:19,215
cut that last part.
885
00:41:24,307 --> 00:41:25,351
[knock on door]
886
00:41:25,395 --> 00:41:26,352
come in.
887
00:41:26,396 --> 00:41:27,353
what's that?
888
00:41:27,397 --> 00:41:28,529
strategy.
889
00:41:28,572 --> 00:41:30,574
there are plenty
of old acquaintances
890
00:41:30,618 --> 00:41:33,490
dying to sweep me
off my feet.
891
00:41:33,534 --> 00:41:35,057
ranked in
financial order?
892
00:41:35,100 --> 00:41:37,625
this is no time
to beat around the bush.
893
00:41:37,668 --> 00:41:39,409
what is that asterisk?
894
00:41:40,410 --> 00:41:41,672
over 80.
895
00:41:41,716 --> 00:41:43,195
don't you think
896
00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:44,806
you could
give kaddir
another chance?
897
00:41:44,849 --> 00:41:48,505
he tried to crush me
with his automatic gate.
898
00:41:48,549 --> 00:41:50,333
i think he made
his feelings quite clear.
899
00:41:50,376 --> 00:41:51,334
[tires screech]
900
00:41:51,377 --> 00:41:52,378
[meow]
901
00:41:55,294 --> 00:41:56,252
jonathan.
902
00:41:56,295 --> 00:41:57,601
hi, mom.
903
00:41:57,645 --> 00:41:58,602
hi, honey.
904
00:41:58,646 --> 00:42:00,256
hi, aunt jess.
905
00:42:00,299 --> 00:42:01,649
is kaddir ready
to apologize?
906
00:42:01,692 --> 00:42:03,259
he threw me out.
907
00:42:03,302 --> 00:42:04,260
damn!
908
00:42:04,303 --> 00:42:05,827
anyway...
909
00:42:05,870 --> 00:42:08,394
uncle mark?
910
00:42:08,438 --> 00:42:10,745
i need a place
to crash.
911
00:42:10,788 --> 00:42:12,485
this is not
a good time.
912
00:42:12,529 --> 00:42:15,532
of course you can
stay here, darling.
913
00:42:15,576 --> 00:42:16,533
thanks.
914
00:42:16,577 --> 00:42:17,839
uncle mark, um...
915
00:42:17,882 --> 00:42:19,754
yes, jonathan.
916
00:42:19,797 --> 00:42:22,713
i think I just
ran over your cat.
917
00:42:30,634 --> 00:42:32,244
dear god,
918
00:42:32,288 --> 00:42:36,161
here lies the body
of scruffy bannister.
919
00:42:36,205 --> 00:42:38,555
and this time
it's for real.
920
00:42:39,687 --> 00:42:41,384
in your infinite wisdom,
921
00:42:41,427 --> 00:42:45,780
you saw fit to give him
back to me once,
922
00:42:45,823 --> 00:42:47,651
but you ripped him
from my bosom again.
923
00:42:50,828 --> 00:42:52,482
what you guys doing?
924
00:42:52,525 --> 00:42:53,701
cat funeral.
925
00:42:53,744 --> 00:42:55,050
can I have him?
926
00:42:55,093 --> 00:42:56,225
no.
927
00:42:56,268 --> 00:42:58,096
what would you do
with a dead cat?
928
00:42:58,140 --> 00:43:00,795
i'll keep him in the freezer
till school starts.
929
00:43:00,838 --> 00:43:02,971
you disgusting
little ghoul.
930
00:43:03,014 --> 00:43:04,581
who are you,
its mother?
931
00:43:06,409 --> 00:43:07,671
ow!
932
00:43:07,715 --> 00:43:08,803
and get me out
933
00:43:08,846 --> 00:43:11,806
of this little piece
of hell on earth
934
00:43:11,849 --> 00:43:13,503
you call california.
935
00:43:13,546 --> 00:43:14,678
amen.
936
00:43:29,737 --> 00:43:30,694
[meow]
937
00:43:31,869 --> 00:43:32,957
[meow]
938
00:43:33,001 --> 00:43:36,439
i'll kill you again,
kitty litter breath.
939
00:43:36,482 --> 00:43:39,442
jerram, I understand.
940
00:43:39,485 --> 00:43:40,748
some other time then.
941
00:43:40,791 --> 00:43:41,749
right.
942
00:43:41,792 --> 00:43:42,967
bye.
943
00:43:44,055 --> 00:43:46,014
you pathetic worm.
944
00:43:46,057 --> 00:43:47,929
not going
so well, huh?
945
00:43:47,972 --> 00:43:49,626
married. Turned gay.
946
00:43:49,670 --> 00:43:52,150
married. In jail--
Malpractice.
947
00:43:52,194 --> 00:43:53,412
dead!
948
00:43:53,456 --> 00:43:54,762
marriage material's
getting tough to find.
949
00:43:54,805 --> 00:43:57,242
claudia.
950
00:43:57,286 --> 00:44:01,812
what would you say
to a nice, handsome,
divorced car dealer?
951
00:44:01,856 --> 00:44:04,032
foreign or domestic?
952
00:44:07,644 --> 00:44:10,255
you think
you can foist me off
953
00:44:10,299 --> 00:44:11,735
on some total stranger,
954
00:44:11,779 --> 00:44:14,912
but I'm telling you,
if I don't like--
955
00:44:14,956 --> 00:44:16,653
is that his?
956
00:44:18,220 --> 00:44:19,525
lead on.
957
00:44:27,577 --> 00:44:29,405
here she is.
958
00:44:31,146 --> 00:44:33,191
well, hello.
959
00:44:33,235 --> 00:44:36,804
jess says
you and your boy
need a place to stay.
960
00:44:41,722 --> 00:44:43,680
that's right.
961
00:44:43,724 --> 00:44:44,768
be my guest.
962
00:44:51,688 --> 00:44:52,994
i can't believe it.
963
00:44:53,037 --> 00:44:55,692
they were like
two sex magnets
964
00:44:55,736 --> 00:44:58,695
straining not to slam
into each other.
965
00:44:58,739 --> 00:45:00,001
i know the feeling.
966
00:45:00,044 --> 00:45:01,785
let's make love.
967
00:45:01,829 --> 00:45:03,091
we'll start
right here
968
00:45:03,134 --> 00:45:05,267
and wind up
in the begonias.
969
00:45:05,310 --> 00:45:07,182
whoo!
970
00:45:07,225 --> 00:45:08,792
what about bernice?
971
00:45:08,836 --> 00:45:10,794
i threw
some raw meat in.
972
00:45:10,838 --> 00:45:11,882
she'll be fine.
973
00:45:17,192 --> 00:45:19,150
i can't believe
you're old enough
974
00:45:19,194 --> 00:45:20,412
to be
jonathan's mom.
975
00:45:20,456 --> 00:45:21,457
i'm not.
976
00:45:25,113 --> 00:45:28,725
huge neighborhood
scandal, the nuns...
977
00:45:33,817 --> 00:45:34,775
something burning?
978
00:45:34,818 --> 00:45:35,863
hmm?
979
00:45:45,220 --> 00:45:47,788
dad, can we get
some marshmallows?
980
00:45:47,831 --> 00:45:48,789
shut up.
981
00:45:48,832 --> 00:45:50,747
i cannot believe it.
982
00:45:50,791 --> 00:45:52,662
16 pairs of italian pumps
incinerated.
983
00:45:52,705 --> 00:45:55,404
c.k., you get
those fireworks
out of there?
984
00:45:55,447 --> 00:45:56,448
yeah.
985
00:45:59,016 --> 00:46:00,409
well...
986
00:46:00,452 --> 00:46:01,802
most of them.
987
00:46:03,107 --> 00:46:04,674
oh!
988
00:46:04,717 --> 00:46:06,676
my tools.
989
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:07,851
my tools.
990
00:46:07,895 --> 00:46:09,244
your tools?
My shoes.
991
00:46:09,287 --> 00:46:10,767
back off, gold card.
992
00:46:10,811 --> 00:46:12,769
i just lost
my goddamn house.
993
00:46:12,813 --> 00:46:14,075
what's the big fuss?
994
00:46:14,118 --> 00:46:17,165
even a cretin like you
must have insurance.
995
00:46:17,208 --> 00:46:19,776
it ought to kick in
in three months.
996
00:46:19,820 --> 00:46:21,169
what about my kids?
997
00:46:21,212 --> 00:46:25,173
send them to a hotel.
Anyone who owns a lotus--
998
00:46:25,216 --> 00:46:27,828
it's a perk
for selling them.
999
00:46:27,871 --> 00:46:32,833
so, bannister,
what are wegoing
to do about this?
1000
00:46:40,797 --> 00:46:43,756
make sure fangster
stays in his box.
1001
00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:46,194
waste of a good belt.
1002
00:46:49,110 --> 00:46:51,764
put that stuff down.
Get me a scotch.
1003
00:46:51,808 --> 00:46:53,331
just make yourself
comfortable.
1004
00:46:54,637 --> 00:46:56,639
rhonda,
you won't believe it.
1005
00:46:56,682 --> 00:46:58,032
our house burned down.
1006
00:46:58,075 --> 00:47:00,686
these are all
I could find.
1007
00:47:00,730 --> 00:47:03,080
fine. Just give them
to somebody.
1008
00:47:03,124 --> 00:47:04,995
we don't
have to do this.
1009
00:47:05,039 --> 00:47:06,605
yes, we do
1010
00:47:06,649 --> 00:47:10,696
if we want to avoid
a lawsuit for arson.
1011
00:47:10,740 --> 00:47:12,873
does this fold out?
1012
00:47:29,150 --> 00:47:30,716
hey, Mr. Bannister,
1013
00:47:30,760 --> 00:47:32,414
guess what
didn't burn up?
1014
00:47:35,199 --> 00:47:37,158
i'm calling
about the room
1015
00:47:37,201 --> 00:47:38,768
for $300 a month.
1016
00:47:38,811 --> 00:47:39,595
it is?
1017
00:47:39,638 --> 00:47:40,596
terrific.
1018
00:47:40,639 --> 00:47:42,250
um, immediately.
1019
00:47:42,293 --> 00:47:44,252
um...
1020
00:47:44,295 --> 00:47:45,949
seven people.
1021
00:47:45,993 --> 00:47:48,082
uh-huh.
That's great, phil.
1022
00:47:48,125 --> 00:47:49,692
by the way,
1023
00:47:49,735 --> 00:47:52,086
what's happening
with your guest house?
1024
00:47:52,129 --> 00:47:55,698
uh-huh. How long is
she expected to live?
1025
00:47:55,741 --> 00:47:58,005
i'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1026
00:47:58,048 --> 00:48:00,137
i'm sorry.
1027
00:48:00,181 --> 00:48:02,400
you hang up first.
1028
00:48:02,444 --> 00:48:04,402
no. You.
1029
00:48:04,446 --> 00:48:05,577
brenda.
1030
00:48:05,621 --> 00:48:07,579
i can hear you
breathing.
1031
00:48:07,623 --> 00:48:09,233
jonathan,
did your grandmother
1032
00:48:09,277 --> 00:48:11,148
send you
a birthday check?
1033
00:48:11,192 --> 00:48:12,584
grandma's dead, mom.
1034
00:48:12,628 --> 00:48:15,152
no, brenda. You
hang up first.
1035
00:48:15,196 --> 00:48:16,980
no, you.
1036
00:48:17,024 --> 00:48:17,981
brenda.
1037
00:48:18,025 --> 00:48:20,592
hey, did they
get another cat?
1038
00:48:20,636 --> 00:48:22,594
no, it's
the same one.
1039
00:48:22,638 --> 00:48:24,596
they buried
him alive. Cool.
1040
00:48:24,640 --> 00:48:27,251
don't you be
getting any ideas.
1041
00:48:27,295 --> 00:48:30,602
but if they can
bury him, I can, too.
1042
00:48:30,646 --> 00:48:34,258
you get
permission first.
1043
00:48:34,302 --> 00:48:35,477
no.no.
1044
00:48:35,520 --> 00:48:38,262
bernice: don't worry about me
having dinner!
1045
00:48:38,306 --> 00:48:40,438
i'll just
lick the crumbs
1046
00:48:40,482 --> 00:48:42,832
off my
filthy sheets!
1047
00:49:06,682 --> 00:49:08,553
yoo-hoo.
1048
00:49:08,597 --> 00:49:12,688
aah!
1049
00:49:22,785 --> 00:49:24,178
whoa!
1050
00:49:24,221 --> 00:49:25,396
jessie!
1051
00:49:25,440 --> 00:49:26,397
what is it?
1052
00:49:26,441 --> 00:49:27,746
don't look in there.
1053
00:49:27,790 --> 00:49:29,400
what do they want?
1054
00:49:29,444 --> 00:49:30,401
they want...
1055
00:49:30,445 --> 00:49:31,837
to stay here.
1056
00:49:31,881 --> 00:49:33,404
why, mark, why?
1057
00:49:33,448 --> 00:49:36,799
maybe we're in
some vacation guide
for the damned.
1058
00:49:38,670 --> 00:49:41,151
aah!
1059
00:49:41,195 --> 00:49:42,500
help! Mark!
1060
00:49:42,544 --> 00:49:43,849
i got them.
1061
00:49:43,893 --> 00:49:45,503
oh, god.
Oh, god.
1062
00:49:45,547 --> 00:49:47,027
get out!
1063
00:49:47,070 --> 00:49:48,767
oh, aah!
1064
00:49:48,811 --> 00:49:49,725
oh, mark.
1065
00:49:55,513 --> 00:49:57,820
who the hell
dressed you people?
1066
00:49:57,863 --> 00:50:01,780
get out of my hou...
1067
00:50:01,824 --> 00:50:02,912
no!
1068
00:50:02,955 --> 00:50:03,913
no.
1069
00:50:03,956 --> 00:50:05,175
jessie, run.
1070
00:50:05,219 --> 00:50:06,829
leave her.
1071
00:50:08,135 --> 00:50:09,919
leave--leave her alone.
1072
00:50:09,962 --> 00:50:11,921
jess. Leave jessie.
1073
00:50:13,140 --> 00:50:14,402
oh.
1074
00:50:21,235 --> 00:50:23,237
take bernice.
1075
00:50:23,280 --> 00:50:24,716
there's no more. Don't.
1076
00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:27,458
i don't have
any more guest towels.
1077
00:50:27,502 --> 00:50:30,418
i don't have
any more towels.
1078
00:50:31,854 --> 00:50:33,073
mark.
1079
00:50:33,116 --> 00:50:36,424
honey, I know
you're frustrated.
1080
00:50:37,642 --> 00:50:40,993
oh, god. Honey. I'm
not in the mood. Just--
1081
00:50:41,037 --> 00:50:42,169
what?
1082
00:50:42,212 --> 00:50:43,648
je-jessie?
1083
00:50:43,692 --> 00:50:44,649
hmm?
1084
00:50:44,693 --> 00:50:46,695
i'm way over here.
What?
1085
00:50:49,654 --> 00:50:53,484
aah!
1086
00:51:02,406 --> 00:51:05,148
have you guys
seen fangster?
1087
00:51:50,454 --> 00:51:51,760
mark.
1088
00:51:51,803 --> 00:51:53,675
what?
1089
00:51:53,718 --> 00:51:56,852
we have to do something
about these people.
1090
00:52:01,509 --> 00:52:03,554
yes. Uh-huh.
1091
00:52:03,598 --> 00:52:05,252
i have only
one question.
1092
00:52:05,295 --> 00:52:07,993
do they
all have to
pass out flowers
1093
00:52:08,037 --> 00:52:09,604
at the airport?
1094
00:52:09,647 --> 00:52:10,605
uh-huh.
1095
00:52:10,648 --> 00:52:12,737
and shave
their heads?
1096
00:52:12,781 --> 00:52:14,043
thank you.
1097
00:52:15,871 --> 00:52:17,089
[knock knock]
1098
00:52:18,656 --> 00:52:20,005
hi.
1099
00:52:20,049 --> 00:52:21,268
what are you
doing here?
1100
00:52:21,311 --> 00:52:24,923
look, uncle mark,
I've been watching you,
1101
00:52:24,967 --> 00:52:27,361
having to take
care of all of us.
1102
00:52:27,404 --> 00:52:30,755
and, um...
So I'm job-hunting.
1103
00:52:30,799 --> 00:52:32,975
and I thought, maybe...
1104
00:52:33,018 --> 00:52:36,021
i was wondering
if, uh...
1105
00:52:37,109 --> 00:52:38,067
you know.
1106
00:52:38,110 --> 00:52:40,722
you mean,
something here?
1107
00:52:40,765 --> 00:52:41,810
ooh.
1108
00:52:41,853 --> 00:52:43,594
i don't think so,
jonathan.
1109
00:52:43,638 --> 00:52:44,987
well, that's cool.
1110
00:52:45,030 --> 00:52:48,164
i just wanted
to get my own place.
1111
00:52:48,208 --> 00:52:50,297
i'll call personnel.
1112
00:52:50,340 --> 00:52:52,951
well, no special
treatment or anything.
1113
00:52:52,995 --> 00:52:56,259
i'll start anywhere.
The mail room
would be great.
1114
00:52:56,303 --> 00:52:59,175
frank, this is
my nephew jonathan.
1115
00:52:59,219 --> 00:53:02,091
take good care
of him, ok?
1116
00:53:02,134 --> 00:53:03,658
welcome aboard,
jonathan.
1117
00:53:03,701 --> 00:53:06,530
wow. Great stamps.
1118
00:53:06,574 --> 00:53:07,879
i got a collection.
1119
00:53:07,923 --> 00:53:10,969
good. If you
need anything,
you call me.
1120
00:53:11,013 --> 00:53:12,362
my mom was wrong.
1121
00:53:12,406 --> 00:53:14,538
you're not an asshole.
1122
00:53:14,582 --> 00:53:17,062
i-i'll be out
of your hair
1123
00:53:17,106 --> 00:53:18,412
in no time.
1124
00:53:19,674 --> 00:53:22,067
hi. Bernice.
Hi, yes.
1125
00:53:22,111 --> 00:53:24,113
how are you? Good.
1126
00:53:24,156 --> 00:53:26,811
yeah, I want
the wings of the night.
1127
00:53:26,855 --> 00:53:28,813
my nails go with it.
1128
00:53:28,857 --> 00:53:30,337
oh, I lost one.
1129
00:53:30,380 --> 00:53:32,469
yeah, send it
c.o.d., hon.
1130
00:53:32,513 --> 00:53:35,080
oh, yeah,
toot-toot from me.
1131
00:53:35,124 --> 00:53:36,995
ok. Bye-bye, hon.
1132
00:53:37,039 --> 00:53:40,347
jessa, what pumps
do you wear with this?
1133
00:53:40,390 --> 00:53:43,393
no, that's pee
for Dr. Penix' test.
1134
00:53:43,437 --> 00:53:45,177
he's checking
the ovum count.
1135
00:53:45,221 --> 00:53:48,485
you want me
to mail urine
to new jersey?
1136
00:53:48,529 --> 00:53:50,531
would you?
1137
00:53:50,574 --> 00:53:53,055
um, wait, wait.
1138
00:53:53,098 --> 00:53:54,448
i need your opinion.
1139
00:53:54,491 --> 00:53:56,754
these are my favorite
names for the baby--
1140
00:53:56,798 --> 00:54:01,890
amaretta, endive,
caramel, or treblinka.
1141
00:54:01,933 --> 00:54:05,328
yokel. Naming a baby
after a german
concentration camp.
1142
00:54:05,372 --> 00:54:08,375
i thought treblinka
was a fairy
in cinderella.
1143
00:54:08,418 --> 00:54:10,159
you moron.
1144
00:54:10,202 --> 00:54:13,293
i hope my water breaks
on your fur coat!
1145
00:54:34,923 --> 00:54:37,882
you ok?
1146
00:54:37,926 --> 00:54:39,884
remember when that
was our room?
1147
00:54:39,928 --> 00:54:41,538
yes, I know,
1148
00:54:41,582 --> 00:54:43,714
in the days
before time.
1149
00:54:43,758 --> 00:54:45,063
baby...
1150
00:54:45,107 --> 00:54:46,804
i hate those people.
1151
00:54:46,848 --> 00:54:50,155
jonathan got a job.
It's going to
get better.
1152
00:55:00,078 --> 00:55:03,081
right now,
it's you and me,
all alone...
1153
00:55:03,125 --> 00:55:06,128
right here,
in the closet.
1154
00:55:06,171 --> 00:55:07,521
[meowrrr]
1155
00:55:09,958 --> 00:55:11,438
there.
1156
00:55:11,481 --> 00:55:15,877
i don't think
he'll be coming back
this time.
1157
00:55:15,920 --> 00:55:19,054
what does the c.k.
Stand for anyway?
1158
00:55:19,097 --> 00:55:20,098
confirmed kills,
1159
00:55:20,142 --> 00:55:23,058
but I might change it
to cat killer.
1160
00:55:23,101 --> 00:55:24,407
what do you think?
1161
00:55:24,451 --> 00:55:26,714
i think
we have a problem.
1162
00:55:26,757 --> 00:55:27,715
c.k.,
1163
00:55:27,758 --> 00:55:29,456
do you know
what happens
1164
00:55:29,499 --> 00:55:31,545
when you cram
too many
laboratory rats
1165
00:55:31,588 --> 00:55:33,155
into the same cage?
1166
00:55:33,198 --> 00:55:35,244
they turn into fags.
1167
00:55:35,287 --> 00:55:37,551
some do. Others
turn into cannibals.
1168
00:55:37,594 --> 00:55:39,248
they tear
each other apart.
1169
00:55:39,291 --> 00:55:41,990
minimizing the space
by blowing
rooms apart
1170
00:55:42,033 --> 00:55:43,557
really aggravates
the situation.
1171
00:55:43,600 --> 00:55:45,907
it's just
so boring here.
1172
00:55:45,950 --> 00:55:48,083
listen,
you psychotic
little shit.
1173
00:55:48,126 --> 00:55:49,476
get your
act together,
1174
00:55:49,519 --> 00:55:53,175
or you'll be a face
on a milk carton.
1175
00:55:53,218 --> 00:55:55,438
you touch me,
I sue you.
1176
00:55:55,482 --> 00:55:58,223
i got a lawyer
on retainer.
1177
00:56:00,922 --> 00:56:02,402
[meow]
1178
00:56:03,968 --> 00:56:05,927
[knock on door]
1179
00:56:05,970 --> 00:56:07,537
hi, hi.hi, honey.
1180
00:56:07,581 --> 00:56:10,627
hear that noise outside?
C.k.'s mowing the lawn.
1181
00:56:10,671 --> 00:56:12,977
all he needed
was some discipline,
1182
00:56:13,021 --> 00:56:14,326
some positive
motivation.
1183
00:56:16,024 --> 00:56:17,721
we can control
this situation,
1184
00:56:17,765 --> 00:56:20,071
be the captains
of our destiny.
1185
00:56:20,115 --> 00:56:21,464
things
are looking up.
1186
00:56:21,508 --> 00:56:23,814
i think
this will work out,
1187
00:56:23,858 --> 00:56:24,989
don't you?
1188
00:56:28,602 --> 00:56:29,864
yeah.
1189
00:56:29,907 --> 00:56:31,126
yeah.
1190
00:56:34,608 --> 00:56:36,044
shoot them.
1191
00:56:36,087 --> 00:56:37,349
strangle them.
1192
00:56:37,393 --> 00:56:38,873
cook them
in the oven!
1193
00:56:38,916 --> 00:56:41,092
hide his medication.huh? What?
1194
00:56:41,136 --> 00:56:42,485
kindness.
1195
00:56:42,529 --> 00:56:43,486
oh --
1196
00:56:43,530 --> 00:56:44,531
[bleep]
1197
00:56:44,574 --> 00:56:47,185
they have a clean
bill of health?
1198
00:56:47,229 --> 00:56:49,579
then I guess
i'd use insulin.
1199
00:56:49,623 --> 00:56:51,929
inject 30 ccs
into a freckle.
1200
00:56:51,973 --> 00:56:53,583
bingo.
All the symptoms
1201
00:56:53,627 --> 00:56:55,106
of a massive
coronary.
1202
00:56:55,150 --> 00:56:57,979
a hammer,
definitely a hammer.
1203
00:56:58,022 --> 00:57:00,982
i don't know,
clorox in the bean dip?
1204
00:57:06,988 --> 00:57:08,729
jessie, we're back.
1205
00:57:10,905 --> 00:57:12,863
how would you
murder someone?
1206
00:57:12,907 --> 00:57:15,866
if you have a question,
los angeles...
1207
00:57:17,564 --> 00:57:18,913
ask somebody else.
1208
00:57:18,956 --> 00:57:22,264
i swear to god,
I don't know the answers.
1209
00:57:22,307 --> 00:57:24,092
i don't know anything.
1210
00:57:24,135 --> 00:57:27,095
well, that's quite
an interesting
question, jessica.
1211
00:57:27,138 --> 00:57:29,445
i'm sure that's
crossed everybody's mind
1212
00:57:29,489 --> 00:57:31,099
now and then.
1213
00:57:31,142 --> 00:57:33,101
how would you
murder someone?
1214
00:57:33,144 --> 00:57:36,104
if you were desperate
to get rid of them
1215
00:57:36,147 --> 00:57:38,106
because they
were driving you
1216
00:57:38,149 --> 00:57:41,109
out of
your [bleep] mind?
1217
00:57:41,152 --> 00:57:43,503
well,
i'd probably...
1218
00:57:44,721 --> 00:57:47,289
it looks
like insulin's
the way to go,
1219
00:57:47,332 --> 00:57:49,030
from what that
doctor said.
1220
00:57:49,073 --> 00:57:51,336
like you can
just tap dance
into a drugstore
1221
00:57:51,380 --> 00:57:53,382
and get that stuff?
1222
00:57:53,425 --> 00:57:56,559
please! Oh,
and that clorox bit.
1223
00:57:56,603 --> 00:57:58,300
there is a real winner.
1224
00:57:58,343 --> 00:58:01,085
those people were up
all night with the runs,
1225
00:58:01,129 --> 00:58:04,262
and they refuse
to jiggle the handle.
1226
00:58:04,306 --> 00:58:06,308
what are you
talking about?
1227
00:58:06,351 --> 00:58:08,136
house guests.
1228
00:58:09,485 --> 00:58:13,271
i am talking about
house guests from hell.
1229
00:58:14,621 --> 00:58:16,013
she's losing it.
1230
00:58:16,057 --> 00:58:18,755
listen to me.
No, get that snack later.
1231
00:58:18,799 --> 00:58:20,104
you listen to me.
1232
00:58:20,148 --> 00:58:23,107
lock your doors.
Don't answer the phone.
1233
00:58:23,151 --> 00:58:25,762
if you have to,
leave the country,
1234
00:58:25,806 --> 00:58:27,764
but don't let them in.
1235
00:58:27,808 --> 00:58:30,550
don't let them fool you.
They're very tricky.
1236
00:58:30,593 --> 00:58:33,204
they might look like
your mother, your father,
1237
00:58:33,248 --> 00:58:34,771
or your best friend,
1238
00:58:34,815 --> 00:58:36,207
but they're animals.
1239
00:58:36,251 --> 00:58:38,296
they're cockroaches.
1240
00:58:38,340 --> 00:58:40,995
if we have
a nuclear war,
1241
00:58:41,038 --> 00:58:44,259
the only living thing
to survive
1242
00:58:44,302 --> 00:58:46,391
will be house guests!
1243
00:58:54,051 --> 00:58:55,836
we'll be right back...
1244
00:58:55,879 --> 00:58:57,881
with weather.
1245
00:59:17,901 --> 00:59:19,207
[loud rock music plays]
1246
00:59:19,250 --> 00:59:21,165
mark?
1247
00:59:21,209 --> 00:59:22,776
hello?
1248
00:59:26,954 --> 00:59:29,086
hey, buddy!
1249
00:59:29,130 --> 00:59:30,522
excuse me!
1250
00:59:30,566 --> 00:59:31,959
have you seen mark?
1251
00:59:32,002 --> 00:59:32,960
huh?
1252
00:59:33,003 --> 00:59:35,266
have you seen mark?
1253
00:59:35,310 --> 00:59:37,660
upstairs, I think.
1254
00:59:39,140 --> 00:59:42,230
are the, uh,
bannisters doing
a little remodeling?
1255
00:59:43,579 --> 00:59:46,277
i guess you might
say that, yes.
1256
00:59:46,321 --> 00:59:48,715
i'm building
bleachers
for the tv set.
1257
00:59:50,673 --> 00:59:52,022
sure, sure you are.
1258
00:59:52,066 --> 00:59:53,720
ok. Sure.
1259
00:59:55,373 --> 00:59:57,027
another one.
1260
01:00:00,727 --> 01:00:01,771
thank god.
1261
01:00:01,815 --> 01:00:03,860
move, dork!
1262
01:00:07,124 --> 01:00:08,691
you repulsive
little midget!
1263
01:00:08,735 --> 01:00:10,911
next time, flush!
1264
01:00:10,954 --> 01:00:14,001
excuse me.
Have you seen
mark bannister?
1265
01:00:14,044 --> 01:00:16,351
well, he was
in the kitchen.
1266
01:00:16,394 --> 01:00:19,267
mark, my chains
are squeaking!
1267
01:00:19,310 --> 01:00:22,052
it's time
for my lube job!
1268
01:00:23,140 --> 01:00:26,535
i wouldn't go in there
if I were you.
1269
01:00:26,578 --> 01:00:27,928
sure.
1270
01:00:27,971 --> 01:00:29,712
sure.
1271
01:00:29,756 --> 01:00:33,847
come on, scruffy.
Let's go visit
mr. Microwave.
1272
01:00:33,890 --> 01:00:34,935
[meow]
1273
01:00:34,978 --> 01:00:37,285
i'll make you
a cat souffle.
1274
01:00:37,328 --> 01:00:39,374
come on.
1275
01:00:39,417 --> 01:00:42,072
excuse me, son?
1276
01:00:42,116 --> 01:00:44,596
have you, uh,
seen mark bannister?
1277
01:00:44,640 --> 01:00:46,860
backyard.
1278
01:00:46,903 --> 01:00:49,819
shit, look at
what you made me do.
1279
01:00:49,863 --> 01:00:51,778
i'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
1280
01:01:00,917 --> 01:01:02,919
jessie?
1281
01:01:05,487 --> 01:01:07,794
god, you're not
moving in, too, are you?
1282
01:01:07,837 --> 01:01:09,796
huh? No.
1283
01:01:09,839 --> 01:01:12,102
mark didn't come in
to work, though,
1284
01:01:12,146 --> 01:01:14,975
and your phone's
been off the hook.
1285
01:01:15,018 --> 01:01:17,717
mark, what the hell's
going on?
1286
01:01:17,760 --> 01:01:20,458
well, I didn't sleep
too good last night.
1287
01:01:20,502 --> 01:01:23,461
at 4:00 in the morning,
the sprinklers went off.
1288
01:01:23,505 --> 01:01:25,028
i believe
there's a short
1289
01:01:25,072 --> 01:01:27,335
in one of
these extension cords.
1290
01:01:27,378 --> 01:01:28,989
no, I mean them.
1291
01:01:29,032 --> 01:01:31,774
why don't you
get rid of them?
1292
01:01:31,818 --> 01:01:33,080
oh, no.
1293
01:01:33,123 --> 01:01:34,124
then I will.
1294
01:01:34,168 --> 01:01:35,647
no, we've tried that.
1295
01:01:35,691 --> 01:01:37,388
it just makes more.
1296
01:01:37,432 --> 01:01:40,087
we just hand over
our paychecks,
1297
01:01:40,130 --> 01:01:41,784
stay out
of their way...
1298
01:01:41,828 --> 01:01:44,787
it's for the best.
1299
01:01:44,831 --> 01:01:46,571
you got to
listen to me.
1300
01:01:46,615 --> 01:01:49,661
if you don't work,
you won't have
a paycheck.
1301
01:01:49,705 --> 01:01:52,969
hey, big guy,
come back to me, ok?
1302
01:01:53,013 --> 01:01:56,625
hydrolux--
Down 32 points.
1303
01:01:56,668 --> 01:01:58,801
grindle has gone
completely ape.
1304
01:01:58,845 --> 01:02:00,629
we got to go.what should I do?
1305
01:02:00,672 --> 01:02:02,979
we got to
go to work.
1306
01:02:03,023 --> 01:02:04,938
got to go to work.
1307
01:02:04,981 --> 01:02:05,939
bye, jessie.
1308
01:02:05,982 --> 01:02:08,332
don't be late
for dinner, honey.
1309
01:02:08,376 --> 01:02:09,986
i won't.
What are we having?
1310
01:02:11,640 --> 01:02:14,077
just squab again.
1311
01:02:14,121 --> 01:02:16,863
oh, god. What
happened here?
1312
01:02:16,906 --> 01:02:19,996
well, uh, you know...
1313
01:02:20,040 --> 01:02:22,912
crackpots file indictments
for lawsuits every day.
1314
01:02:22,956 --> 01:02:25,436
even the navy
can make a mistake.
1315
01:02:25,480 --> 01:02:27,525
no, I didn't
know that.
1316
01:02:27,569 --> 01:02:30,441
i guess I missed
the wall street journal
1317
01:02:30,485 --> 01:02:32,008
all last week.
1318
01:02:32,052 --> 01:02:34,010
no, don't worry.
I'm sorry.
1319
01:02:34,054 --> 01:02:37,013
your hydrolux stock will
be sold immediately.
1320
01:02:37,057 --> 01:02:38,885
bannister!
1321
01:02:38,928 --> 01:02:40,016
yes?
1322
01:02:40,060 --> 01:02:41,191
explain this.
1323
01:02:41,235 --> 01:02:43,367
the grindle situation
is under control.
1324
01:02:43,411 --> 01:02:45,369
that's not what
i'm talking about.
1325
01:02:45,413 --> 01:02:46,806
what?
1326
01:02:46,849 --> 01:02:49,373
almost $6,000
worth of calls
to south america--
1327
01:02:49,417 --> 01:02:50,984
from your office.
1328
01:02:51,027 --> 01:02:52,246
obviously
it's a mistake.
1329
01:02:52,289 --> 01:02:53,595
I've never made these.
1330
01:02:53,638 --> 01:02:55,162
oh? Who did?
1331
01:02:55,205 --> 01:02:57,686
how the hell do I--
1332
01:02:57,729 --> 01:02:58,861
i will find out.
1333
01:02:58,905 --> 01:03:00,950
you do that.
1334
01:03:05,085 --> 01:03:07,914
jonathan,
do you know anything
about these phone--
1335
01:03:07,957 --> 01:03:10,917
you got another one
of these packages.
1336
01:03:10,960 --> 01:03:11,918
what packages?
1337
01:03:11,961 --> 01:03:13,920
these.
Didn't you get them?
1338
01:03:13,963 --> 01:03:16,879
jonathan said he'd
take care of it.
See you.
1339
01:03:37,857 --> 01:03:39,032
aah!
1340
01:03:46,691 --> 01:03:47,779
oh!
1341
01:03:47,823 --> 01:03:50,217
bannister, what the hell
are you doing?
1342
01:03:50,260 --> 01:03:51,479
sorry.
1343
01:04:07,495 --> 01:04:08,670
oh, mark?
1344
01:04:08,713 --> 01:04:12,065
can't you see
i'm not in?
1345
01:04:22,989 --> 01:04:24,425
[trumpets]
1346
01:04:24,468 --> 01:04:26,775
aah!
1347
01:04:26,818 --> 01:04:28,081
tiny, no!
1348
01:04:28,124 --> 01:04:29,473
fred?
1349
01:04:29,517 --> 01:04:31,258
it's all right.
Steady. Steady.
1350
01:04:31,301 --> 01:04:33,086
what the hell's
going on?
1351
01:04:33,129 --> 01:04:34,609
i did it, pudge.
1352
01:04:34,652 --> 01:04:36,263
i did like you said.
1353
01:04:36,306 --> 01:04:38,178
fred,
i'll be right back.
1354
01:04:38,221 --> 01:04:39,396
mark!
1355
01:04:39,440 --> 01:04:41,181
meet tiny bannister.
1356
01:04:41,224 --> 01:04:43,618
[trumpets]
1357
01:04:43,661 --> 01:04:45,446
this isn't
a good time.
1358
01:04:45,489 --> 01:04:47,013
i followed my heart.
1359
01:04:47,056 --> 01:04:48,884
i found the real me.
1360
01:04:48,928 --> 01:04:50,103
you joined
the circus?
1361
01:04:50,146 --> 01:04:51,626
no, I traveled.
1362
01:04:51,669 --> 01:04:53,889
i met interesting people.
Well, shriners mostly.
1363
01:04:53,933 --> 01:04:57,066
let me get rid
of this box,
then we'll--
1364
01:04:58,067 --> 01:04:59,286
oh, god!
1365
01:05:07,207 --> 01:05:08,730
howdy.
1366
01:05:08,773 --> 01:05:10,993
do you own
this animal?
1367
01:05:11,037 --> 01:05:12,603
what? Oh, no.
1368
01:05:12,647 --> 01:05:13,909
she's mine.
1369
01:05:13,953 --> 01:05:15,563
do you have
a permit?
1370
01:05:15,606 --> 01:05:17,347
no. We just got
into town.
1371
01:05:17,391 --> 01:05:19,045
is this your residence?
1372
01:05:19,088 --> 01:05:19,959
no.
1373
01:05:20,002 --> 01:05:21,177
[trumpets]
1374
01:05:21,221 --> 01:05:22,962
uh, but
my wife's upstairs.
1375
01:05:23,005 --> 01:05:24,789
they got her
strung up.
1376
01:05:24,833 --> 01:05:26,443
what?
1377
01:05:26,487 --> 01:05:29,359
she's all right.
She just tried
to stab me.
1378
01:05:31,100 --> 01:05:32,841
excuse me?
1379
01:05:36,976 --> 01:05:38,499
jonathan!
1380
01:05:38,542 --> 01:05:39,500
jonathan!
1381
01:05:39,543 --> 01:05:42,068
mark, did you see
the elephant?
1382
01:05:42,111 --> 01:05:43,504
he's got diarrhea.
1383
01:05:43,547 --> 01:05:45,027
you are diarrhea.
1384
01:05:45,071 --> 01:05:46,072
[trumpets]
1385
01:05:46,115 --> 01:05:47,638
not the flower bed!
1386
01:05:47,682 --> 01:05:50,032
how do we radio
this in?
1387
01:05:50,076 --> 01:05:51,947
[meow]
1388
01:06:14,665 --> 01:06:17,233
i'll tell you
how we radio it in.
1389
01:06:19,018 --> 01:06:20,149
rock house.
1390
01:06:22,891 --> 01:06:23,935
hey, uncle mark.
1391
01:06:23,979 --> 01:06:26,068
what is this?
1392
01:06:26,112 --> 01:06:28,331
it's got
your name on it.
1393
01:06:28,375 --> 01:06:32,031
i guess it's
your cocaine, man.
1394
01:06:32,074 --> 01:06:33,423
3, baker, 63.
1395
01:06:33,467 --> 01:06:36,035
possible rock house.
Repeat, rock house.
1396
01:06:36,078 --> 01:06:38,298
elephant on premises.
Send backup.
1397
01:06:38,341 --> 01:06:39,734
oh!
1398
01:07:05,455 --> 01:07:08,937
mark, what's
1051 in roman?
1399
01:07:08,980 --> 01:07:12,071
hey, hey,
get off the bed!
1400
01:07:13,724 --> 01:07:15,074
this is the police.
1401
01:07:15,117 --> 01:07:17,424
come out
with your hands up.
1402
01:07:20,035 --> 01:07:22,081
oh!
1403
01:07:31,177 --> 01:07:33,570
bastards wanna play
hard ball, huh?
1404
01:07:33,614 --> 01:07:35,137
call in
the battering ram.
1405
01:07:35,181 --> 01:07:36,443
[woof woof]
1406
01:07:38,836 --> 01:07:41,143
ouch!
Yike! Yike! Yike!
1407
01:07:41,187 --> 01:07:43,711
what the hell is this?
1408
01:07:58,204 --> 01:07:59,161
hut! Hut!
1409
01:07:59,205 --> 01:08:00,597
hut! Hut!
1410
01:08:00,641 --> 01:08:03,383
claud,
what the hell's
going on out there?
1411
01:08:03,426 --> 01:08:04,993
men, lots of men.
1412
01:08:05,036 --> 01:08:06,342
what men?
1413
01:08:06,386 --> 01:08:08,779
the police.
They're arresting
your husband.
1414
01:08:08,823 --> 01:08:09,780
[trumpets]
1415
01:08:09,824 --> 01:08:11,086
that's a good girl.
1416
01:08:11,130 --> 01:08:12,261
now steady.
1417
01:08:12,305 --> 01:08:13,958
we're going back
to the garage.
1418
01:08:14,002 --> 01:08:15,569
all right, now.
1419
01:08:15,612 --> 01:08:18,006
real slow
to the squad car.
1420
01:08:18,049 --> 01:08:20,051
get your hands up.
1421
01:08:26,101 --> 01:08:27,885
hey! Hey, you! Buddy!
1422
01:08:27,929 --> 01:08:30,366
what the hell
are you doing out there?
1423
01:08:30,410 --> 01:08:32,455
get off my new driveway!
1424
01:08:32,499 --> 01:08:35,066
those pebbles
are worth $600!
1425
01:08:35,110 --> 01:08:37,068
$600!
1426
01:08:37,112 --> 01:08:39,070
600,000...
1427
01:08:39,114 --> 01:08:41,421
you old fart.
1428
01:08:52,214 --> 01:08:54,085
hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
1429
01:08:54,129 --> 01:08:55,478
hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
1430
01:08:55,522 --> 01:08:57,088
hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
1431
01:08:57,132 --> 01:08:58,481
hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
1432
01:08:58,525 --> 01:09:00,091
hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
1433
01:09:00,135 --> 01:09:01,484
hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
1434
01:09:01,528 --> 01:09:03,051
hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!
1435
01:09:04,444 --> 01:09:05,401
russell, please.
1436
01:09:05,445 --> 01:09:06,402
i can't.
1437
01:09:06,446 --> 01:09:08,361
please let me go on.
1438
01:09:08,404 --> 01:09:11,059
i swear to god
i'm better now,
1439
01:09:11,102 --> 01:09:13,583
and I will never
let my home life
1440
01:09:13,627 --> 01:09:15,933
affect
my professional life
again. Please?
1441
01:09:16,934 --> 01:09:19,154
this is myass, jessie.
1442
01:09:19,198 --> 01:09:20,721
get in there.
1443
01:09:20,764 --> 01:09:22,113
thank you,
thank you.
1444
01:09:22,157 --> 01:09:23,332
10 seconds.
1445
01:09:26,509 --> 01:09:29,208
this is the channel 12
8:00 report.
1446
01:09:29,251 --> 01:09:33,821
camera one,
tape on 5, 4,
1447
01:09:33,864 --> 01:09:35,997
3, 2...
1448
01:09:36,040 --> 01:09:37,390
good evening.
1449
01:09:37,433 --> 01:09:39,130
our top story tonight--
1450
01:09:39,174 --> 01:09:40,784
a s.w.a.t. Team strike
has been called in
1451
01:09:40,828 --> 01:09:42,221
on a santa monica home.
1452
01:09:42,264 --> 01:09:46,137
we now go live
to field reporter brad bovee.
1453
01:09:46,181 --> 01:09:48,705
details are still
a little sketchy,
1454
01:09:48,749 --> 01:09:51,317
but apparently police,
suspecting cocaine
on the premises,
1455
01:09:51,360 --> 01:09:53,319
have called in
a full strike.
1456
01:09:53,362 --> 01:09:56,017
we've heard they
have reason to believe
1457
01:09:56,060 --> 01:09:58,237
this is a rock house.
1458
01:09:59,934 --> 01:10:01,544
[burp]
1459
01:10:04,286 --> 01:10:06,636
[trumpets]
1460
01:10:06,680 --> 01:10:10,118
uh, wait a minute.
Someone's coming out.
1461
01:10:11,511 --> 01:10:13,077
are you all right?
1462
01:10:13,121 --> 01:10:15,123
yeah. That was cool.
1463
01:10:15,166 --> 01:10:16,472
are we on tv?
1464
01:10:16,516 --> 01:10:17,908
brenda, call me.
1465
01:10:17,952 --> 01:10:18,909
[telephone rings]
1466
01:10:18,953 --> 01:10:20,433
are you the homeowner?
1467
01:10:20,476 --> 01:10:22,478
hell, no. You're
saying he was
dealing drugs?
1468
01:10:22,522 --> 01:10:23,958
we don't--
1469
01:10:24,001 --> 01:10:26,308
i never did trust
that guy.
1470
01:10:26,352 --> 01:10:28,702
it's them quiet,
wimpy types
1471
01:10:28,745 --> 01:10:31,705
who get involved in
this sort of thing.
1472
01:10:31,748 --> 01:10:33,228
flipping out,
raping, killing.
1473
01:10:33,272 --> 01:10:37,101
karen, back to you
until we make sense
out of this.
1474
01:10:37,145 --> 01:10:38,755
this isn't
your mama.
1475
01:10:38,799 --> 01:10:41,410
[trumpets]
1476
01:10:41,454 --> 01:10:42,498
thanks, brad.
1477
01:10:42,542 --> 01:10:45,371
we understand
that the homeowners
1478
01:10:45,414 --> 01:10:47,111
are being sought
for questioning
1479
01:10:47,155 --> 01:10:50,114
and that
that baby elephant
you just saw
1480
01:10:50,158 --> 01:10:52,116
is apparently
unlicensed
1481
01:10:52,160 --> 01:10:54,380
and will be taken
into police custody.
1482
01:10:54,423 --> 01:10:55,946
we'll keep you
updated
1483
01:10:55,990 --> 01:10:58,949
as this bizarre
story unfolds.
1484
01:11:05,260 --> 01:11:07,044
i don't believe it.
1485
01:11:07,088 --> 01:11:08,437
more poisonous gases.
1486
01:11:08,481 --> 01:11:10,004
investigators
at this hour
1487
01:11:10,047 --> 01:11:12,006
are still trying
to determine
1488
01:11:12,049 --> 01:11:14,008
the source
of poisonous gases,
1489
01:11:14,051 --> 01:11:15,401
which rendered
12 employees
1490
01:11:15,444 --> 01:11:18,969
of the mid-wilshire district
businesses unconscious.
1491
01:11:43,429 --> 01:11:44,952
jessie!
1492
01:11:46,083 --> 01:11:47,389
thank god
I found you.
1493
01:11:47,433 --> 01:11:48,564
mark, what happened?
1494
01:11:48,608 --> 01:11:50,566
our nephew
is a drug czar.
1495
01:11:50,610 --> 01:11:52,307
now I'm
david janssen.
1496
01:11:52,351 --> 01:11:53,917
i had this whole--
1497
01:11:53,961 --> 01:11:55,919
the dow jones
plummeted again today.
1498
01:11:55,963 --> 01:11:58,531
among the hardest hit
was the hydrolux corporation,
1499
01:11:58,574 --> 01:12:01,882
which, amid allegations
of fraud by the u.s. Navy,
1500
01:12:01,925 --> 01:12:04,711
fell a record 85 points.
1501
01:12:04,754 --> 01:12:06,713
hydrolux president
robert nellins
1502
01:12:06,756 --> 01:12:07,888
was unavailable
for comment.
1503
01:12:07,931 --> 01:12:09,933
channel 12 news
has learned, however,
1504
01:12:09,977 --> 01:12:12,980
he's on vacation
in bora bora.
1505
01:12:13,023 --> 01:12:15,417
great. I'm
an unemployed
david janssen.
1506
01:12:15,461 --> 01:12:17,419
i forgot to sell
grindle's stock.
1507
01:12:17,463 --> 01:12:20,030
shit, shit, shit!
Come on, let's go.
1508
01:12:20,074 --> 01:12:23,425
i don't want to go.
I'm staying in here.
1509
01:12:23,469 --> 01:12:25,296
let's live here.
1510
01:12:25,340 --> 01:12:26,341
what?
1511
01:12:26,385 --> 01:12:27,864
look, it's beautiful.
1512
01:12:27,908 --> 01:12:29,300
everything's
clean and nice,
1513
01:12:29,344 --> 01:12:32,042
and, oh, mark,
there's food
in the re--
1514
01:12:32,086 --> 01:12:34,349
look. Mock chicken
pot pie. Mmm!
1515
01:12:34,393 --> 01:12:36,438
come on.no!
1516
01:12:36,482 --> 01:12:38,919
you're not going
to take me away.
1517
01:12:38,962 --> 01:12:39,920
aah!
1518
01:12:39,963 --> 01:12:40,921
jessie! Jessie!
1519
01:12:40,964 --> 01:12:42,357
listen to me, mark!
1520
01:12:42,401 --> 01:12:44,925
we can live
on a soap opera set.
1521
01:12:44,968 --> 01:12:46,492
they'll never
know we're here.
1522
01:12:46,535 --> 01:12:49,103
we can be the phantoms
of channel 12.
1523
01:12:49,146 --> 01:12:50,974
everything is
going to be--
1524
01:12:51,018 --> 01:12:54,282
don't say everything
is going to be all right!
1525
01:12:54,325 --> 01:12:57,938
it's not going
to be all right
ever, ever, ever.
1526
01:12:57,981 --> 01:12:59,287
honey, honey,
honey, honey.
1527
01:12:59,330 --> 01:13:01,942
all right, listen,
listen, all right.
1528
01:13:01,985 --> 01:13:02,899
jessie, listen.
1529
01:13:02,943 --> 01:13:03,900
we'll, um...
1530
01:13:03,944 --> 01:13:05,511
we'll stay here
tonight.
1531
01:13:05,554 --> 01:13:07,121
tomorrow we're
leaving town,
1532
01:13:07,164 --> 01:13:08,905
changing our names.
1533
01:13:08,949 --> 01:13:10,951
we're going
to start over.
1534
01:13:10,994 --> 01:13:12,387
what about
our house?
1535
01:13:12,431 --> 01:13:15,434
i don't give a damn
about the house.
1536
01:13:15,477 --> 01:13:18,262
i don't care
about our jobs
or our stuff.
1537
01:13:19,481 --> 01:13:22,441
the only thing
that matters...
1538
01:13:22,484 --> 01:13:25,052
really matters...
1539
01:13:26,227 --> 01:13:28,316
is us.
1540
01:13:29,317 --> 01:13:31,058
oh, honey.
1541
01:13:58,999 --> 01:14:00,391
[sob]
1542
01:14:00,435 --> 01:14:03,482
yeah, I know
what you mean.
1543
01:14:03,525 --> 01:14:06,049
let's grab
what we can
1544
01:14:06,093 --> 01:14:07,964
and get out
of here, ok?
1545
01:14:08,008 --> 01:14:08,965
ok.
1546
01:14:09,009 --> 01:14:10,184
[beep]
1547
01:14:10,227 --> 01:14:12,491
yes, this is Dr. Penix
calling from trenton.
1548
01:14:12,534 --> 01:14:15,494
bernice, I've been trying
to reach you for weeks.
1549
01:14:15,537 --> 01:14:17,321
I've got
your test results.
1550
01:14:17,365 --> 01:14:20,020
i don't know how
to tell you this, but...
1551
01:14:24,546 --> 01:14:26,766
you're not pregnant.
1552
01:14:26,809 --> 01:14:28,071
what?
1553
01:14:28,115 --> 01:14:29,551
dr. Penix just called,
1554
01:14:29,595 --> 01:14:34,077
and he said
there is absolutely
no way in the world
1555
01:14:34,121 --> 01:14:35,514
that you are pregnant.
1556
01:14:35,557 --> 01:14:37,994
you must have sent
the wrong pee!
1557
01:14:39,518 --> 01:14:41,128
look at that, bernice.
1558
01:14:41,171 --> 01:14:43,043
your stomach's
flat as a board.
1559
01:14:43,086 --> 01:14:45,393
i got a thin fetus!
1560
01:14:45,436 --> 01:14:49,963
bernice, get over it
and get out.
1561
01:14:50,006 --> 01:14:52,269
you're just jealous
1562
01:14:52,313 --> 01:14:55,229
because no sperm
in his right mind
1563
01:14:55,272 --> 01:14:57,797
would swim up your
shriveled canal!
1564
01:14:57,840 --> 01:15:00,277
aah!
1565
01:15:00,321 --> 01:15:02,062
let go of me!
1566
01:15:02,105 --> 01:15:03,498
hey! Hey!
1567
01:15:03,542 --> 01:15:05,369
hey! Hey!
1568
01:15:05,413 --> 01:15:08,024
oh!
1569
01:15:08,068 --> 01:15:10,940
oh!
1570
01:15:24,084 --> 01:15:26,695
stay away from me,
crazy lady.
1571
01:15:26,739 --> 01:15:27,696
say it.
1572
01:15:27,740 --> 01:15:28,697
what?
1573
01:15:28,741 --> 01:15:30,873
i want to hear
you say it.
1574
01:15:30,917 --> 01:15:32,527
all right.
I guess...
1575
01:15:32,571 --> 01:15:35,399
i'm not pregnant,
but I could
have sworn...
1576
01:15:35,443 --> 01:15:38,707
i felt my breasts swelling,
constipation, nauseous.
1577
01:15:38,751 --> 01:15:39,708
say it!
1578
01:15:39,752 --> 01:15:40,927
somebody help!
1579
01:15:40,970 --> 01:15:43,494
aren't you going
to do something?
1580
01:15:43,538 --> 01:15:44,626
nah.
1581
01:15:44,670 --> 01:15:45,888
no.
1582
01:15:45,932 --> 01:15:48,369
i'm going to count
to three, bernice. One...
1583
01:15:48,412 --> 01:15:49,892
i want
a second opinion.
1584
01:15:49,936 --> 01:15:51,241
two...
1585
01:15:52,242 --> 01:15:53,200
oh.
1586
01:15:53,243 --> 01:15:54,201
say it.
1587
01:15:54,244 --> 01:15:55,594
all right.
We're leaving.
1588
01:15:55,637 --> 01:15:58,205
fred, start packing!
1589
01:16:04,646 --> 01:16:06,909
yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
1590
01:16:06,953 --> 01:16:08,911
oh, honey.
It's over.
1591
01:16:08,955 --> 01:16:11,131
it's finally over.
1592
01:16:13,133 --> 01:16:14,351
not quite.
1593
01:16:19,922 --> 01:16:22,098
let's clean house.
1594
01:16:22,142 --> 01:16:25,319
yeah. Kick ass.
1595
01:16:44,686 --> 01:16:47,733
company!company!
1596
01:16:52,476 --> 01:16:54,696
aah!
1597
01:16:56,480 --> 01:16:59,005
oh, sis!
1598
01:16:59,048 --> 01:17:03,183
jessa's got
a surprise for you!
1599
01:17:03,226 --> 01:17:05,751
you want to play?
1600
01:17:05,794 --> 01:17:07,274
let's go, bannister!
1601
01:17:08,579 --> 01:17:11,191
now let's play cuisinart.
1602
01:17:16,979 --> 01:17:18,851
oh, claudia.
1603
01:17:18,894 --> 01:17:21,157
uh, I'm not decent!
1604
01:17:23,246 --> 01:17:24,987
tell me something
I don't know.
1605
01:17:25,031 --> 01:17:27,163
calm down.
I'll get you
a valium.
1606
01:17:27,207 --> 01:17:29,818
you think you're
real sharp, don't you?
1607
01:17:29,862 --> 01:17:31,777
people are, like,
going totally mental.
1608
01:17:34,431 --> 01:17:37,043
let me ask you
a question.
1609
01:17:37,086 --> 01:17:39,393
are you circumcised?
1610
01:17:39,436 --> 01:17:40,437
i'm warning you.
1611
01:17:42,135 --> 01:17:45,051
those are
charles jordan!
1612
01:17:45,094 --> 01:17:49,359
i want you to get
your gold-digging,
lily-white ass
1613
01:17:49,403 --> 01:17:51,187
out of my house!
1614
01:17:51,231 --> 01:17:52,188
ooh.
1615
01:17:52,232 --> 01:17:56,540
no!
1616
01:17:59,500 --> 01:18:01,284
back off. Back off.
1617
01:18:01,328 --> 01:18:02,416
ok, man,
don't kill me.
1618
01:18:02,459 --> 01:18:04,374
don't.
Don't kill me.
1619
01:18:04,418 --> 01:18:07,247
you wimp.
1620
01:18:07,290 --> 01:18:09,249
i always figured
you'd come up
short in a clinch.
1621
01:18:09,292 --> 01:18:11,251
come on!
1622
01:18:17,910 --> 01:18:19,476
stay away from me!
1623
01:18:19,520 --> 01:18:22,741
stay away from me!
1624
01:18:33,969 --> 01:18:35,797
oof!what's this?
1625
01:18:35,841 --> 01:18:37,581
it's jonathan.
1626
01:18:37,625 --> 01:18:39,670
get the hell
out of my house.
1627
01:18:39,714 --> 01:18:41,498
back off!
1628
01:18:41,542 --> 01:18:44,023
try that again,
and I'll cut you.
I swear.
1629
01:18:49,593 --> 01:18:52,074
give me
your keys!
1630
01:18:52,118 --> 01:18:53,902
give me
your car keys now!
1631
01:18:53,946 --> 01:18:54,990
shut up!
1632
01:18:55,034 --> 01:18:57,079
wouldn't you rather
take the lotus?
1633
01:18:57,123 --> 01:18:58,298
yeah.
1634
01:18:59,995 --> 01:19:01,954
that's an
excellent idea.
Take them.
1635
01:19:01,997 --> 01:19:03,172
oops. I'm sorry
about that.
1636
01:19:03,216 --> 01:19:05,087
you know what?
1637
01:19:05,131 --> 01:19:07,046
if we thought
about this,
1638
01:19:07,089 --> 01:19:08,569
maybe we could
work it out.
1639
01:19:08,612 --> 01:19:09,788
bullshit!
1640
01:19:09,831 --> 01:19:11,659
you know, jonathan,
we're all family.
1641
01:19:11,702 --> 01:19:13,313
we could
sit down, talk--
1642
01:19:13,356 --> 01:19:14,705
no way, man!
1643
01:19:14,749 --> 01:19:16,707
let's call
the prayer line.
1644
01:19:16,751 --> 01:19:18,579
uncle mark, you are
a yuppie dickhead!
1645
01:19:18,622 --> 01:19:19,885
well--get back.
1646
01:19:19,928 --> 01:19:23,105
one day I'll
buy and sell
people like you.
1647
01:19:23,149 --> 01:19:26,108
i'm going
to make some noise.
1648
01:19:26,152 --> 01:19:28,502
we know you are.
1649
01:19:31,070 --> 01:19:32,636
jonathan.
1650
01:19:32,680 --> 01:19:33,942
move.
1651
01:19:33,986 --> 01:19:35,639
hey, that's
my fireworks!
1652
01:19:35,683 --> 01:19:39,426
get away from that car!
That's a loaner!
1653
01:19:49,392 --> 01:19:51,917
stupid things
didn't work.
1654
01:19:51,960 --> 01:19:53,135
[explosion]
1655
01:19:57,139 --> 01:19:59,141
they always work.
1656
01:20:00,142 --> 01:20:03,058
i am the king
of this castle!
1657
01:20:03,102 --> 01:20:05,800
and I am
his queen!
1658
01:20:05,844 --> 01:20:08,368
we will burn it
to the ground
1659
01:20:08,411 --> 01:20:12,111
before we let
any of you back in!
1660
01:20:12,154 --> 01:20:15,723
you parasites!
1661
01:20:30,216 --> 01:20:32,000
are you
the homeowners here?
1662
01:20:32,044 --> 01:20:33,784
that's right.
What about it?
1663
01:20:33,828 --> 01:20:35,786
on behalf
of the p.d.,
1664
01:20:35,830 --> 01:20:37,701
I've been authorized
to issue an apology
1665
01:20:37,745 --> 01:20:39,007
for what happened
last night.
1666
01:20:39,051 --> 01:20:40,791
we're prepared
to pay for damages.
1667
01:20:40,835 --> 01:20:41,923
all the damages?
1668
01:20:41,967 --> 01:20:43,272
yes, ma'am.
1669
01:20:43,316 --> 01:20:45,187
wait. What about
the criminal investigation?
1670
01:20:45,231 --> 01:20:47,886
there was some talk
about pursuing that.
1671
01:20:47,929 --> 01:20:50,018
we found our hard
evidence was missing.
1672
01:20:50,062 --> 01:20:52,020
what evidence?
1673
01:20:52,064 --> 01:20:54,414
the cat that dropped
dead on your lawn...
1674
01:20:54,457 --> 01:20:56,155
disappeared
from the evidence room.
1675
01:20:56,198 --> 01:20:58,940
there'll be hell
to pay over that one.
1676
01:21:01,029 --> 01:21:01,987
yo!
1677
01:21:02,030 --> 01:21:03,597
wa-wa-woo-woo!
1678
01:21:03,640 --> 01:21:07,079
yay!
1679
01:21:07,122 --> 01:21:09,951
iya iya iya iya iya!
1680
01:21:09,995 --> 01:21:11,387
woo!
1681
01:21:18,133 --> 01:21:20,919
I've been looking
all over for you!
1682
01:21:20,962 --> 01:21:23,878
oh, yeah, grindle?
Let me tell you something.
1683
01:21:23,922 --> 01:21:26,359
I've had it with
loud-mouth bullies like you.
1684
01:21:26,402 --> 01:21:28,013
the navy dropped
the fraud charges.
1685
01:21:28,056 --> 01:21:29,666
go ahead
and fire me.
1686
01:21:29,710 --> 01:21:32,582
hydrolux went up
157 points.
1687
01:21:32,626 --> 01:21:33,975
i made a bundle
because of you.
1688
01:21:34,019 --> 01:21:35,977
you're the worst kind
of arrogant--
1689
01:21:36,021 --> 01:21:37,544
i want you
to work for me.
1690
01:21:37,587 --> 01:21:38,545
putz!
1691
01:21:38,588 --> 01:21:39,763
i'll double
your salary.
1692
01:21:39,807 --> 01:21:40,764
screw you.
1693
01:21:40,808 --> 01:21:42,070
all right.
Triple.
1694
01:21:42,114 --> 01:21:43,767
screw you blue!
1695
01:21:43,811 --> 01:21:45,073
senior vice-president
1696
01:21:45,117 --> 01:21:46,988
at four times
your present salary.
1697
01:21:47,032 --> 01:21:49,773
that's my final offer--
If that's ok.
1698
01:21:49,817 --> 01:21:51,993
let me tell you
something, asshole--
1699
01:21:52,037 --> 01:21:53,386
honey, shut up.
1700
01:21:55,040 --> 01:21:57,085
we'll let you know.
1701
01:21:57,129 --> 01:21:58,521
great!
1702
01:21:58,565 --> 01:22:01,089
your kind of hardball's
what I've been looking for.
1703
01:22:01,133 --> 01:22:03,352
we're going
to make millions.
1704
01:22:06,051 --> 01:22:08,314
i don't believe
we've met.
1705
01:22:08,357 --> 01:22:09,968
uh, bob grindle,
ma'am.
1706
01:22:10,969 --> 01:22:13,058
and you are, uh...
1707
01:22:13,101 --> 01:22:15,886
your wildest dreams
come true, darling.
1708
01:22:18,063 --> 01:22:20,979
lotus is definitely
the car of the future.
1709
01:22:21,022 --> 01:22:22,632
when my insurance
kicks in,
1710
01:22:22,676 --> 01:22:24,983
i'll be back
on easy street.
1711
01:22:25,026 --> 01:22:27,028
in the meantime,
I was wondering
1712
01:22:27,072 --> 01:22:30,031
if you had room for me
and my wonderful kids.
1713
01:22:30,075 --> 01:22:31,076
maybe.
1714
01:22:31,119 --> 01:22:33,469
i don't want to live
with some cop.
1715
01:22:33,513 --> 01:22:36,603
you want brussels sprouts
three meals a day, punk?
1716
01:22:42,522 --> 01:22:44,089
yo, baby.
Chop chop!
1717
01:22:44,132 --> 01:22:46,047
don't "yo, baby" me.
1718
01:22:46,091 --> 01:22:48,484
you said you were
going to change.
1719
01:22:48,528 --> 01:22:51,052
i thought you might
change and maybe shave.
1720
01:22:51,096 --> 01:22:52,619
you look like
fu manchu.
1721
01:22:52,662 --> 01:22:55,274
bernice, remember
what we practiced?
1722
01:22:57,102 --> 01:22:59,930
no yapping.that's right.
1723
01:22:59,974 --> 01:23:03,456
fine. You can
do the talking
from now on
1724
01:23:03,499 --> 01:23:05,588
'cause my jaws
are tired...
1725
01:23:08,330 --> 01:23:10,811
[meow]
1726
01:23:10,854 --> 01:23:11,812
[meow]
1727
01:23:11,855 --> 01:23:12,813
scruffy doodle!
1728
01:23:12,856 --> 01:23:14,815
oh, there is a god.
1729
01:23:14,858 --> 01:23:17,078
come to me, boo-boo.
1730
01:23:17,122 --> 01:23:18,601
[meow]
1731
01:23:20,125 --> 01:23:21,474
bernice...
1732
01:23:21,517 --> 01:23:25,086
i don't think
he wants to go with you.
1733
01:23:25,130 --> 01:23:26,827
according
to my calculations,
1734
01:23:26,870 --> 01:23:29,003
he has...
Five lives left.
1735
01:23:29,047 --> 01:23:31,484
he's welcome
to spend the rest
with us.
1736
01:23:31,527 --> 01:23:33,051
he's earned it.
1737
01:23:33,094 --> 01:23:35,096
don't be silly.
Come to mama.
1738
01:23:35,140 --> 01:23:36,445
aah!
1739
01:23:37,446 --> 01:23:39,187
traitor.
1740
01:23:40,232 --> 01:23:43,191
we got to stay
in touch, stretch.
1741
01:23:43,235 --> 01:23:44,453
ooh!
1742
01:23:44,497 --> 01:23:47,065
i'll call you
once a month.
1743
01:23:47,108 --> 01:23:49,632
is collect ok
until I get a job?
1744
01:23:50,851 --> 01:23:54,115
i'll write. If you ever
get to new jersey--
1745
01:23:54,159 --> 01:23:56,030
we'll stay
at the holiday inn.
1746
01:24:01,601 --> 01:24:02,602
[horn honks]
1747
01:24:04,604 --> 01:24:05,953
[trumpets]
1748
01:24:27,496 --> 01:24:30,412
i cannot believe
this place is ours again.
1749
01:24:51,259 --> 01:24:53,870
[toilet handle
dripping]
1750
01:24:58,223 --> 01:25:00,050
i'll be back.
1751
01:25:30,124 --> 01:25:31,865
♪ when you sing
1752
01:25:34,128 --> 01:25:37,697
♪ of the joy
only love can bring ♪
1753
01:25:41,048 --> 01:25:42,876
♪ heaven knows
1754
01:25:44,921 --> 01:25:48,229
♪ it's in my heart
and my soul ♪
1755
01:25:52,277 --> 01:25:56,019
♪ we're caught in a world
full of tears ♪
1756
01:25:57,456 --> 01:26:02,983
♪ of so many sad times
and fears ♪
1757
01:26:03,026 --> 01:26:05,377
♪ so while
there's a chance ♪
1758
01:26:05,420 --> 01:26:07,379
♪ and you're near
1759
01:26:07,422 --> 01:26:10,033
♪ well, let's dance
1760
01:26:12,340 --> 01:26:14,081
♪ yeah, yeah
1761
01:26:14,124 --> 01:26:15,430
♪ let's dance
1762
01:26:24,961 --> 01:26:26,485
♪ let's dance
1763
01:26:30,097 --> 01:26:31,838
♪ let's dance
1764
01:26:35,668 --> 01:26:37,409
♪ let's dance ♪
1765
01:26:40,107 --> 01:26:43,458
♪ it's a rat race,
and the rats will win ♪
1766
01:26:43,502 --> 01:26:47,723
♪ if we don't find time
for us again ♪
1767
01:26:47,767 --> 01:26:53,512
♪ what we need is
a quiet place of our own ♪
1768
01:26:53,555 --> 01:26:55,253
♪ to keep us safe
1769
01:26:55,296 --> 01:26:59,735
♪ what we thought
couldn't happen here ♪
1770
01:26:59,779 --> 01:27:03,304
♪ moved right in
and made it clear ♪
1771
01:27:03,348 --> 01:27:07,134
♪ we'll never be alone
1772
01:27:07,177 --> 01:27:14,054
♪ we have watched our happy home
become a madhouse ♪
1773
01:27:14,097 --> 01:27:18,058
♪ madhouse
1774
01:27:18,101 --> 01:27:21,757
♪ madhouse
1775
01:27:21,801 --> 01:27:25,152
♪ the lights are on
but nobody's home ♪
1776
01:27:33,769 --> 01:27:36,946
♪ just a dream
we held on to ♪
1777
01:27:36,990 --> 01:27:40,994
♪ a place alone
for me and you ♪
1778
01:27:41,037 --> 01:27:44,650
♪ now the dream
comes crashing down ♪
1779
01:27:44,693 --> 01:27:47,914
♪ I feel that
we've been losing ground ♪
1780
01:27:47,957 --> 01:27:52,048
♪ moments fade away
1781
01:27:52,092 --> 01:27:55,748
♪ insanity is here to stay
1782
01:27:55,791 --> 01:27:59,360
♪ we got more
than we bargained for ♪
1783
01:27:59,404 --> 01:28:03,103
♪ it's standing here
outside the door ♪
1784
01:28:03,146 --> 01:28:06,715
♪ of our madhouse
1785
01:28:06,759 --> 01:28:09,936
♪ madhouse
1786
01:28:09,979 --> 01:28:14,114
♪ madhouse
1787
01:28:14,157 --> 01:28:17,987
♪ the lights are on
but nobody's home ♪
1788
01:28:59,420 --> 01:29:02,554
♪ madhouse
1789
01:29:02,597 --> 01:29:06,471
♪ madhouse
1790
01:29:06,514 --> 01:29:10,431
♪ madhouse
1791
01:29:10,475 --> 01:29:14,740
♪ the lights are on
but nobody's home ♪
1792
01:29:14,783 --> 01:29:18,091
♪ madhouse
1793
01:29:18,134 --> 01:29:21,660
♪ madhouse
1794
01:29:21,703 --> 01:29:25,751
♪ madhouse
1795
01:29:25,794 --> 01:29:29,276
♪ the lights are on
but nobody's home ♪
1796
01:29:29,319 --> 01:29:33,411
♪ madhouse
1797
01:29:33,454 --> 01:29:36,631
♪ madhouse
1798
01:29:36,675 --> 01:29:40,592
♪ madhouse
1799
01:29:40,635 --> 01:29:44,204
♪ the lights are on
but nobody's home ♪
1800
01:29:44,247 --> 01:29:47,468
♪ madhouse
1801
01:29:47,512 --> 01:29:51,254
♪ madhouse
1802
01:29:51,298 --> 01:29:55,302
♪ madhouse
1803
01:29:55,345 --> 01:29:59,132
♪ the lights are on
but nobody's home ♪
108369
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.