All language subtitles for Madhouse.1990.720p.AMZN.WEBRip.800MB.x264-GalaxyRG

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:36,122 --> 00:00:37,776 ♪ when you sing 2 00:00:40,039 --> 00:00:43,347 ♪ of the joy only love can bring ♪ 3 00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:49,048 ♪ heaven knows 4 00:00:50,876 --> 00:00:54,401 ♪ it's in my heart and my soul ♪ 5 00:00:58,405 --> 00:01:00,973 ♪ we're caught in a world ♪ 6 00:01:01,016 --> 00:01:02,192 ♪ full of tears 7 00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:08,111 ♪ so many sad times and fears ♪ 8 00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:11,810 ♪ so while there's a chance ♪ 9 00:01:11,853 --> 00:01:13,377 ♪ and you're near 10 00:01:13,420 --> 00:01:16,249 ♪ well, let's dance 11 00:01:18,991 --> 00:01:20,688 ♪ hey, hey 12 00:01:20,732 --> 00:01:22,299 ♪ let's dance 13 00:01:24,301 --> 00:01:26,129 ♪ ah, yeah 14 00:01:36,356 --> 00:01:38,445 ♪ there's a world 15 00:01:40,534 --> 00:01:44,147 ♪ far away from the one you see ♪ 16 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:49,456 ♪ there's a dream 17 00:01:51,458 --> 00:01:54,635 ♪ I will never let go 18 00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:02,687 ♪ and then it's suddenly true ♪ 19 00:02:03,949 --> 00:02:08,258 ♪ this moment's for me and for you ♪ 20 00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:13,915 ♪ so while there's not a thing that we can do ♪ 21 00:02:13,959 --> 00:02:16,701 ♪ well, let's dance 22 00:02:19,138 --> 00:02:21,880 ♪ ah, let's dance 23 00:02:25,710 --> 00:02:27,451 ♪ let's dance 24 00:02:29,453 --> 00:02:31,237 ♪ hey, hey ♪ 25 00:02:31,281 --> 00:02:34,371 [toilet flushes] 26 00:02:43,162 --> 00:02:45,033 honey, jiggle the handle. 27 00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:53,564 can't we get that fixed? 28 00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:55,000 after our down payment 29 00:02:55,043 --> 00:02:56,697 we've got about $8.00 left. 30 00:02:56,741 --> 00:02:58,830 all right, then, i'll jiggle. 31 00:03:01,398 --> 00:03:02,268 mark... 32 00:03:02,312 --> 00:03:03,269 mm-hmm? 33 00:03:03,313 --> 00:03:04,270 whoa, mark. 34 00:03:04,314 --> 00:03:06,794 we have to go to work. 35 00:03:06,838 --> 00:03:07,882 i'm working. 36 00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:10,798 are you sure you want to do this? 37 00:03:10,842 --> 00:03:12,235 i never realized 38 00:03:12,278 --> 00:03:15,238 living in an apartment was so inhibiting. 39 00:03:15,281 --> 00:03:17,805 all these walls are ours. 40 00:03:17,849 --> 00:03:20,808 it makes me want to go buy handcuffs. 41 00:03:20,852 --> 00:03:21,853 mmm. 42 00:03:23,289 --> 00:03:24,899 i love this house! 43 00:03:24,943 --> 00:03:27,250 i can't believe we got in. 44 00:03:27,293 --> 00:03:29,904 it was only a five-minute dip in the market. 45 00:03:29,948 --> 00:03:32,255 and you were right on top. 46 00:03:32,298 --> 00:03:34,213 know what I want to do? 47 00:03:34,257 --> 00:03:35,519 what? 48 00:03:35,562 --> 00:03:37,738 buy one of those big, vulgar televisions. 49 00:03:37,782 --> 00:03:39,174 ooh, yeah. 50 00:03:39,218 --> 00:03:41,829 and those tacky pink flamingos for the lawn. 51 00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:43,178 are those deductible? 52 00:03:43,222 --> 00:03:46,269 we can deduct the shit out of everything. 53 00:03:46,312 --> 00:03:49,272 oh, mark! Ooh! 54 00:03:49,315 --> 00:03:50,577 yeow! 55 00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:53,624 [grunting] 56 00:03:59,064 --> 00:04:00,021 oh, rats. 57 00:04:00,065 --> 00:04:01,327 what? 58 00:04:01,371 --> 00:04:03,851 these are all postmarked three weeks ago. 59 00:04:03,895 --> 00:04:05,940 did you call the post office? 60 00:04:05,984 --> 00:04:07,942 i called them, I sent forms, 61 00:04:07,986 --> 00:04:10,945 i sacrificed animals in front of the mailbox. 62 00:04:10,989 --> 00:04:12,686 who do you know in new jersey? 63 00:04:12,730 --> 00:04:13,687 let me see. 64 00:04:13,731 --> 00:04:14,993 an old girlfriend? 65 00:04:15,036 --> 00:04:16,124 could be. 66 00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:19,519 hey! It's from my cousin fred. 67 00:04:19,563 --> 00:04:21,304 you never mentioned a fred. 68 00:04:21,347 --> 00:04:24,176 sure I did-- Ever-ready freddy. 69 00:04:24,219 --> 00:04:26,265 he and his wife 70 00:04:26,309 --> 00:04:28,833 want to spend their vacation with us. 71 00:04:28,876 --> 00:04:30,313 that sounds fun. When? 72 00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,054 today. 73 00:04:38,451 --> 00:04:41,236 are you sure they wouldn't be 74 00:04:41,280 --> 00:04:42,281 more comfortable in a hotel? 75 00:04:42,325 --> 00:04:43,326 jessie! 76 00:04:43,369 --> 00:04:45,937 it's just houseguests. 77 00:04:45,980 --> 00:04:47,330 it'll be fun. 78 00:04:48,940 --> 00:04:50,855 bye. 79 00:04:50,898 --> 00:04:52,857 i don't know, mark. 80 00:04:52,900 --> 00:04:55,207 it sounds like a disaster to me. 81 00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,252 wes, we're talking five days. 82 00:04:57,296 --> 00:04:59,254 chernobyl only took five minutes, 83 00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:01,909 and it didn't come in to l.a.x. At rush hour. 84 00:05:01,953 --> 00:05:02,910 this isfamily. 85 00:05:02,954 --> 00:05:03,911 morning, peppi. 86 00:05:03,955 --> 00:05:04,912 good morning, mark. 87 00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:05,913 the grindle meeting started? 88 00:05:05,957 --> 00:05:06,914 just now. 89 00:05:06,958 --> 00:05:08,742 i give it three minutes. 90 00:05:08,786 --> 00:05:10,178 what do you mean? 91 00:05:10,222 --> 00:05:11,571 martinson's going to woof it. 92 00:05:11,615 --> 00:05:14,095 he busted his ass on this. 93 00:05:14,139 --> 00:05:15,488 he's asking everybody 94 00:05:15,532 --> 00:05:18,273 to turn to page six in their prospectus. 95 00:05:18,317 --> 00:05:19,840 no. One minute. 96 00:05:19,884 --> 00:05:21,929 what's wrong with page six? 97 00:05:21,973 --> 00:05:23,670 morning, lori. Copy those, please. 98 00:05:23,714 --> 00:05:25,368 mark? 99 00:05:25,411 --> 00:05:27,282 he's suggesting a major investment in slaughter security. 100 00:05:27,326 --> 00:05:28,675 so? 101 00:05:28,719 --> 00:05:31,939 grindle caught his second wife in the merger mode 102 00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:33,941 with a slaughter junior executive. 103 00:05:33,985 --> 00:05:35,290 bob, we can work something out. 104 00:05:35,334 --> 00:05:36,379 we can explore-- 105 00:05:36,422 --> 00:05:38,163 nobody explores with my passbooks! 106 00:05:38,206 --> 00:05:39,904 bring around my car! 107 00:05:39,947 --> 00:05:40,905 bob, please. 108 00:05:40,948 --> 00:05:42,167 12% growth with companies 109 00:05:42,210 --> 00:05:43,560 that don't sleep with my wife-- 110 00:05:43,603 --> 00:05:45,823 a simple thing to ask! 111 00:05:45,866 --> 00:05:47,955 i can get you that, mr. Grindle. 112 00:05:47,999 --> 00:05:48,956 who are you? 113 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:50,218 mark bannister, sir. 114 00:05:50,262 --> 00:05:51,872 he's one of our brightest. 115 00:05:51,916 --> 00:05:53,308 martinson was somewhat adventurous, 116 00:05:53,352 --> 00:05:56,529 but I guarantee I can build you a portfolio 117 00:05:56,573 --> 00:05:57,835 that's not only conservative... 118 00:06:00,098 --> 00:06:01,229 but aggressive. 119 00:06:01,273 --> 00:06:04,058 you'll be earning 14% in 3 months. 120 00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:05,277 14? 121 00:06:07,845 --> 00:06:10,238 ok. Last chance. 122 00:06:10,282 --> 00:06:11,849 amaze me. 123 00:06:13,285 --> 00:06:15,809 i want your suggestions for a new portfolio 124 00:06:15,853 --> 00:06:17,855 on my desk by closing-- 125 00:06:19,900 --> 00:06:22,860 i can't believe you're courting bob grindle. 126 00:06:22,903 --> 00:06:24,209 i won't wind up like martinson. 127 00:06:24,252 --> 00:06:25,776 and kroft and gurvitz... 128 00:06:25,819 --> 00:06:27,995 i am in complete control. 129 00:06:30,911 --> 00:06:33,218 jacob, do you want a time-out? 130 00:06:33,261 --> 00:06:35,220 go wait in the car. 131 00:06:35,263 --> 00:06:38,136 excuse me. What's your secret summer fantasy? 132 00:06:38,179 --> 00:06:39,267 chloroform. 133 00:06:39,311 --> 00:06:42,488 ooh! A date with tom cruise. 134 00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:44,272 a date with tom cruise. 135 00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:48,363 these space people come down in this big spaceship 136 00:06:48,407 --> 00:06:50,801 and eat my mom and dad. 137 00:06:50,844 --> 00:06:52,803 what's your secret summer fantasy? 138 00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:54,326 got a question, los angeles? 139 00:06:54,369 --> 00:06:55,980 let me know. I'll find the answer. 140 00:06:56,023 --> 00:06:57,285 karen? 141 00:06:57,329 --> 00:06:59,984 that was jessica bannister, our question girl. 142 00:07:00,027 --> 00:07:01,376 thanks, jessica. 143 00:07:01,420 --> 00:07:02,943 coming up next-- 144 00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:06,077 some hot ideas on how to stay cool. 145 00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:07,208 clear. 146 00:07:09,733 --> 00:07:10,777 whew! 147 00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:15,216 oh, jessie? 148 00:07:17,218 --> 00:07:19,220 hi, russell. What's up? 149 00:07:21,875 --> 00:07:25,618 i'm thinking about trying you out on the 8:00 report. 150 00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,315 that's great! 151 00:07:27,359 --> 00:07:29,492 but it's a harder news hour, 152 00:07:29,535 --> 00:07:31,581 so we'll have to toughen your image. 153 00:07:31,624 --> 00:07:33,583 i can work on that. 154 00:07:33,626 --> 00:07:35,672 uh, I'd like to go over 155 00:07:35,715 --> 00:07:37,108 some question arenas. 156 00:07:37,151 --> 00:07:38,326 what? 157 00:07:42,287 --> 00:07:44,289 i can't believe I put off russell fenn 158 00:07:44,332 --> 00:07:46,596 when he wanted to discuss my big break. 159 00:07:46,639 --> 00:07:48,293 i wanted to make 160 00:07:48,336 --> 00:07:49,599 the in-person airport gesture. 161 00:07:49,642 --> 00:07:50,948 i know, honey. It's ok. 162 00:07:50,991 --> 00:07:52,036 thank you. 163 00:07:52,079 --> 00:07:54,952 wait'll you get a hold of this guy. 164 00:07:54,995 --> 00:07:57,215 girls used to hang all over him. 165 00:07:57,258 --> 00:07:59,086 is that him? 166 00:07:59,130 --> 00:08:00,261 no. 167 00:08:04,352 --> 00:08:05,528 here's a good-looking guy. 168 00:08:05,571 --> 00:08:07,225 is this him? 169 00:08:07,268 --> 00:08:08,487 no. He's too young. 170 00:08:08,531 --> 00:08:10,141 you look that young. 171 00:08:10,184 --> 00:08:11,577 you do! 172 00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:12,752 well, thank you. 173 00:08:26,984 --> 00:08:28,159 fred? 174 00:08:28,202 --> 00:08:29,160 pudge. 175 00:08:29,203 --> 00:08:30,770 pudge? 176 00:08:32,903 --> 00:08:34,339 hi. 177 00:08:34,382 --> 00:08:35,949 ooh! 178 00:08:35,993 --> 00:08:38,343 god, it's great to see you. 179 00:08:38,386 --> 00:08:40,650 we're here! Terra firma. 180 00:08:40,693 --> 00:08:42,739 that's my wife bernice. 181 00:08:42,782 --> 00:08:43,740 bernie. 182 00:08:43,783 --> 00:08:44,741 hello. 183 00:08:44,784 --> 00:08:46,220 hi. Oh, we're family. 184 00:08:46,264 --> 00:08:48,396 I've heard so much about you. 185 00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:49,528 uh-oh. 186 00:08:49,572 --> 00:08:51,399 hi there. I'm jessie. 187 00:08:51,443 --> 00:08:52,749 hi. 188 00:08:52,792 --> 00:08:56,143 she looks just like a movie star, doesn't she? 189 00:08:56,187 --> 00:08:57,231 much better. 190 00:08:57,275 --> 00:08:58,798 see, our tv's on the blink-- 191 00:08:58,842 --> 00:09:01,409 they don't want to hear about our tv. 192 00:09:01,453 --> 00:09:03,847 tell them the big news. 193 00:09:03,890 --> 00:09:04,891 we're, uh... 194 00:09:04,935 --> 00:09:05,849 pregnant! 195 00:09:05,892 --> 00:09:07,851 that's great. Congratulations. 196 00:09:07,894 --> 00:09:10,767 well, we do have something to celebrate. 197 00:09:10,810 --> 00:09:12,769 the station jessie works for 198 00:09:12,812 --> 00:09:14,422 is about to give her a big promotion. 199 00:09:14,466 --> 00:09:16,642 and mark just got a major assignment. 200 00:09:16,686 --> 00:09:19,427 i just got canned. 201 00:09:19,471 --> 00:09:21,604 let's get the luggage. 202 00:09:21,647 --> 00:09:24,389 there's another one, the decorative plaid. 203 00:09:24,432 --> 00:09:26,304 they were out of zebra. 204 00:09:26,347 --> 00:09:27,697 it weighs a ton. 205 00:09:27,740 --> 00:09:29,263 what's in here, bowling balls? 206 00:09:29,307 --> 00:09:31,788 uh, yeah. 207 00:09:43,626 --> 00:09:45,236 oh, yes. Wait. 208 00:09:45,279 --> 00:09:46,411 move everybody out. 209 00:09:46,454 --> 00:09:47,760 that's the one! 210 00:09:47,804 --> 00:09:49,109 move everybody out! 211 00:09:49,153 --> 00:09:50,545 baby, you made it. 212 00:09:50,589 --> 00:09:51,546 [meow] 213 00:09:51,590 --> 00:09:53,461 is you all right? 214 00:09:55,463 --> 00:09:56,551 come on. 215 00:09:56,595 --> 00:10:00,164 did your little ears explode? 216 00:10:00,207 --> 00:10:02,862 fred, you didn't mention anything about a pet. 217 00:10:02,906 --> 00:10:05,735 scruffy bannister, meet your cousins, 218 00:10:05,778 --> 00:10:08,563 mark and jessie. 219 00:10:08,607 --> 00:10:09,869 whoa! 220 00:10:09,913 --> 00:10:10,914 oh! 221 00:10:10,957 --> 00:10:12,698 no, no. It's an inexpensive dress. 222 00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:14,395 did he hurt you? 223 00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:15,745 no. 224 00:10:27,452 --> 00:10:30,716 is this terrible heat bothering you? 225 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:33,371 you don't look so good, baby. 226 00:10:33,414 --> 00:10:35,155 so, fred, 227 00:10:35,199 --> 00:10:37,070 what did you do before getting laid off? 228 00:10:37,114 --> 00:10:40,030 i worked in a sewage treatment plant, pudge. 229 00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:42,119 the best part about that 230 00:10:42,162 --> 00:10:44,382 was the goodies that came down the pipes. 231 00:10:44,425 --> 00:10:46,384 sounds, uh, great. 232 00:10:46,427 --> 00:10:50,475 yeah. One time I found a genuine snakeskin wallet 233 00:10:50,518 --> 00:10:52,172 with 80 bucks in it. 234 00:10:52,216 --> 00:10:55,741 i had to clean it up a little. 235 00:10:55,785 --> 00:10:58,396 oh! I can't believe this traffic. 236 00:10:58,439 --> 00:11:00,137 scruffy's going to go on your carpet. 237 00:11:00,180 --> 00:11:02,705 don't let him under our seat. 238 00:11:02,748 --> 00:11:03,923 he looks nauseous. 239 00:11:06,273 --> 00:11:08,232 what the hell? 240 00:11:08,275 --> 00:11:09,712 i'm sorry. Scruffy's never been carsick. 241 00:11:09,755 --> 00:11:11,365 it's in my ear! 242 00:11:11,409 --> 00:11:13,411 look, the windows are stuck-- 243 00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:18,198 i can't believe a cat's stomach holds so much. 244 00:11:18,242 --> 00:11:19,722 a little club soda 245 00:11:19,765 --> 00:11:21,811 will take that right out. 246 00:11:24,291 --> 00:11:25,945 go play. 247 00:11:28,818 --> 00:11:30,602 [meow] 248 00:11:33,387 --> 00:11:35,346 ooh, earth tones. 249 00:11:35,389 --> 00:11:38,218 hides the dirt. 250 00:11:38,262 --> 00:11:41,178 well, welcome to l.a. 251 00:11:41,221 --> 00:11:43,397 oh, oh, yeah. It's-- 252 00:11:43,441 --> 00:11:45,660 what? Oh, nothing. 253 00:11:45,704 --> 00:11:47,097 no, no, no. What? 254 00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:48,620 it's a little small. 255 00:11:48,663 --> 00:11:50,317 smaller than we pictured. 256 00:11:50,361 --> 00:11:52,711 it's awfully small. 257 00:11:52,755 --> 00:11:53,799 come on. 258 00:11:53,843 --> 00:11:56,149 i'll show you your room. 259 00:11:56,193 --> 00:11:58,195 well, here we are. 260 00:12:04,462 --> 00:12:06,638 bernice, this ok? 261 00:12:06,681 --> 00:12:08,161 oh, sure. I mean, 262 00:12:08,205 --> 00:12:11,164 i don't mind sleeping on a, uh...tofu... 263 00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:13,340 if the baby doesn't. 264 00:12:16,213 --> 00:12:19,520 i cannot believe you gave them our bedroom, mark. 265 00:12:19,564 --> 00:12:21,522 our little haven of privacy. 266 00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:22,915 i'm sorry. 267 00:12:22,959 --> 00:12:24,917 she is pregnant, after all. 268 00:12:24,961 --> 00:12:27,920 it's obviously been a little rough on fred. 269 00:12:27,964 --> 00:12:30,357 maybe this was a bad idea. 270 00:12:30,401 --> 00:12:32,925 that guy in there's a wreck, 271 00:12:32,969 --> 00:12:34,361 like some pod version 272 00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:37,234 of the fred I grew up with. 273 00:12:37,277 --> 00:12:40,324 mark, it is only for five days. 274 00:12:40,367 --> 00:12:41,455 that's right. 275 00:12:41,499 --> 00:12:43,153 they are trying to be nice. 276 00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:45,242 fred gave us these watches. 277 00:12:45,285 --> 00:12:47,244 how can he afford cartiers? 278 00:12:47,287 --> 00:12:51,030 he just lost his job fishing stuff from the sewer. 279 00:13:00,126 --> 00:13:02,085 i'm sorry we lost touch. 280 00:13:02,128 --> 00:13:03,086 hey! 281 00:13:03,129 --> 00:13:04,087 what? 282 00:13:04,130 --> 00:13:05,436 polar bear squad! 283 00:13:05,479 --> 00:13:06,437 oh, gee. 284 00:13:06,480 --> 00:13:08,265 ok, ready? 285 00:13:08,308 --> 00:13:10,920 brrr.brrr. 286 00:13:10,963 --> 00:13:12,704 grrr!grrr! 287 00:13:12,747 --> 00:13:15,272 ya ya ya.ya ya ya. 288 00:13:15,315 --> 00:13:16,273 oh. 289 00:13:16,316 --> 00:13:18,405 all right. Camp redfern forever. 290 00:13:18,449 --> 00:13:20,016 ha ha ha! 291 00:13:25,804 --> 00:13:27,023 ok. 292 00:13:31,462 --> 00:13:32,593 what? 293 00:13:32,637 --> 00:13:34,204 oh. 294 00:13:34,247 --> 00:13:36,206 well, we're family, right? 295 00:13:36,249 --> 00:13:39,296 i'm just going to come on out and ask you. 296 00:13:39,339 --> 00:13:42,342 entre nous, how much did it cost? 297 00:13:42,386 --> 00:13:43,517 what? 298 00:13:43,561 --> 00:13:46,390 come on. I saw that nose in cosmo. 299 00:13:46,433 --> 00:13:50,350 i know you all do it out here. That's fine. 300 00:13:50,394 --> 00:13:52,396 i didn't have my nose done. 301 00:13:53,397 --> 00:13:55,312 sorry. 302 00:13:55,355 --> 00:13:58,271 you don't have to be ashamed with me, hon. 303 00:13:58,315 --> 00:14:01,274 it's only the trained eye of a beautician 304 00:14:01,318 --> 00:14:02,928 that can see that. 305 00:14:02,972 --> 00:14:05,931 there's this great guy in trenton, Dr. Nick. 306 00:14:05,975 --> 00:14:08,151 I've considered getting it done myself. 307 00:14:08,194 --> 00:14:12,198 maybe something to lift my eyes up, show my teeth. 308 00:14:12,242 --> 00:14:14,853 cute. Excuse me one second. 309 00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:16,899 my cousin went to Dr. Nick. 310 00:14:16,942 --> 00:14:19,727 got a free set of ginsu knives 311 00:14:19,771 --> 00:14:23,296 and her old nose in a jar of formaldehyde. 312 00:14:23,340 --> 00:14:26,299 i think I know what's wrong with fred. 313 00:14:26,343 --> 00:14:28,823 hey, pudge, remember the o'boyski twins? 314 00:14:28,867 --> 00:14:31,217 mark, what is this pudge deal? 315 00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:33,393 why do you call him pudge? 316 00:14:33,437 --> 00:14:34,481 nothing. 317 00:14:34,525 --> 00:14:36,788 nothing. 318 00:14:38,094 --> 00:14:39,312 ha ha ha! 319 00:14:39,356 --> 00:14:40,966 [jessie] is that you? 320 00:14:41,010 --> 00:14:42,620 oh, my god! 321 00:14:42,663 --> 00:14:44,274 hey, pudge. 322 00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:47,016 horizontal stripes! Ugh! 323 00:14:47,059 --> 00:14:48,800 which one are you, fred? 324 00:14:48,843 --> 00:14:51,150 that's him blowing the thing in my face. 325 00:14:51,194 --> 00:14:54,806 how many reels of this stuff did you bring, fred? 326 00:14:54,849 --> 00:14:56,808 a couple dozen. 327 00:14:56,851 --> 00:14:59,071 you're a barrel of laughs! 328 00:15:01,769 --> 00:15:02,770 hey. 329 00:15:05,425 --> 00:15:07,340 i'm sorry, i, um-- 330 00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:10,953 my god, did you ever do anything but eat? 331 00:15:10,996 --> 00:15:12,476 well, apparently not. 332 00:15:12,519 --> 00:15:13,999 oh, he's touchy. 333 00:15:14,043 --> 00:15:17,394 when you told me you were big for your age, 334 00:15:17,437 --> 00:15:21,398 i thought you meant you were tall! 335 00:15:22,529 --> 00:15:24,967 oh, god, what are you doing? 336 00:15:25,010 --> 00:15:26,794 mark, you had breasts! 337 00:15:26,838 --> 00:15:28,883 oh, that's a game we used to play-- 338 00:15:28,927 --> 00:15:32,061 macy's thanksgiving parade. 339 00:15:34,889 --> 00:15:37,022 yes! 340 00:15:37,066 --> 00:15:39,807 oh, ow. I'm having labor movements. Stop. 341 00:15:39,851 --> 00:15:42,941 i'm going to get something to drink, all right? 342 00:15:42,985 --> 00:15:44,508 aah! Ha ha ha! 343 00:15:44,551 --> 00:15:47,990 oh, oh, please, grab a snack while you're there. 344 00:15:54,344 --> 00:15:55,519 [meow] 345 00:16:00,350 --> 00:16:01,612 [meow] 346 00:16:06,051 --> 00:16:08,010 [meow] 347 00:16:16,931 --> 00:16:18,455 aah! 348 00:16:24,156 --> 00:16:25,331 you're history! 349 00:16:28,073 --> 00:16:31,729 all right, strike three. He's out of there. 350 00:16:31,772 --> 00:16:32,991 hey, pudge. 351 00:16:33,035 --> 00:16:36,168 haven't lost that old pitching arm, huh? 352 00:16:36,212 --> 00:16:37,648 enough, enough, enough. 353 00:16:37,691 --> 00:16:39,215 rise and shine, lazybones! 354 00:16:39,258 --> 00:16:41,782 we got a big day ahead of us. 355 00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:44,350 we do? 356 00:16:52,576 --> 00:16:54,273 hey, watch the vulva. 357 00:16:56,145 --> 00:16:57,929 it's not working. 358 00:16:57,972 --> 00:17:00,192 stop jiggling. I'm kind of gassy. 359 00:17:00,236 --> 00:17:02,151 no more. I feel sick. 360 00:17:02,194 --> 00:17:03,282 oh, ah! 361 00:17:03,326 --> 00:17:04,196 ah! 362 00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:05,589 aw. 363 00:17:05,632 --> 00:17:08,374 mmm. Graumann's chinese. 364 00:17:08,418 --> 00:17:10,289 I've always wanted to eat here! 365 00:17:10,333 --> 00:17:11,421 joan crawford! 366 00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:14,293 she beat her kids with a coat hanger. 367 00:17:14,337 --> 00:17:15,425 come on! 368 00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:16,774 mommy! Ahh! 369 00:17:16,817 --> 00:17:20,386 ow, fred! You're pressing on my prenatal bloat! 370 00:17:23,737 --> 00:17:24,999 ahh. 371 00:17:26,262 --> 00:17:27,611 aah! 372 00:17:27,654 --> 00:17:29,613 come on, squeeze in. 373 00:17:29,656 --> 00:17:31,832 all right, everybody say trick. 374 00:17:35,184 --> 00:17:37,708 hon, you got the traveler's checks? 375 00:17:37,751 --> 00:17:40,058 you put them in your pocket this morning. 376 00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,712 i watched you. 377 00:17:41,755 --> 00:17:43,714 i don't-- 378 00:17:43,757 --> 00:17:45,716 did you call the traveler's check people? 379 00:17:45,759 --> 00:17:48,066 their machine said they're on vacation. 380 00:17:48,110 --> 00:17:49,894 they'll be back after labor day. 381 00:17:49,937 --> 00:17:51,722 i told him not to buy them 382 00:17:51,765 --> 00:17:53,985 from some guy in the k-mart parking lot. 383 00:17:54,028 --> 00:17:55,639 good morning. 384 00:17:55,682 --> 00:17:56,640 good morning. 385 00:17:56,683 --> 00:17:57,902 good morning. 386 00:17:59,121 --> 00:18:01,384 what's this? 387 00:18:01,427 --> 00:18:04,517 jessie and I can't see everything with you guys. 388 00:18:04,561 --> 00:18:06,693 you shouldn't miss any hot spots. 389 00:18:06,737 --> 00:18:09,218 probably take you the rest of your vacation 390 00:18:09,261 --> 00:18:10,741 just to see all that. 391 00:18:10,784 --> 00:18:13,222 jeez, there's lots of great stuff on here, 392 00:18:13,265 --> 00:18:14,614 but we're broke. 393 00:18:16,790 --> 00:18:18,575 thanks anyway. 394 00:18:18,618 --> 00:18:19,706 here. 395 00:18:19,750 --> 00:18:21,186 no, no, no, mark. 396 00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:22,753 oh, fred, come on. 397 00:18:22,796 --> 00:18:24,058 fred... 398 00:18:24,102 --> 00:18:26,757 we'd rather spend the rest of our vacation 399 00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:28,759 just sitting right here. 400 00:18:28,802 --> 00:18:30,282 take my car.we insist. 401 00:18:39,987 --> 00:18:42,207 ah, yes. 402 00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:46,516 you know something? That's the best $300 we ever invested. 403 00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:48,518 mark?hmm? 404 00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:51,216 when do your cousins get back? 405 00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:53,131 not for several hours. 406 00:19:00,704 --> 00:19:02,053 [whistles] 407 00:19:23,857 --> 00:19:25,511 new fabric softener. 408 00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:02,287 [doorbell buzzes] 409 00:20:02,331 --> 00:20:03,680 oh, um... 410 00:20:03,723 --> 00:20:05,377 forget it.yes. 411 00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:08,728 woman: jessa? 412 00:20:08,772 --> 00:20:10,687 it's my sister! 413 00:20:10,730 --> 00:20:11,818 oh, no. 414 00:20:11,862 --> 00:20:12,776 it's my sister! 415 00:20:12,819 --> 00:20:15,692 honey, my blouse. Hand me it. 416 00:20:15,735 --> 00:20:17,041 i'll get rid of her. 417 00:20:17,084 --> 00:20:18,042 the pants! 418 00:20:18,085 --> 00:20:19,304 [buzz] 419 00:20:19,348 --> 00:20:21,741 just tell her we're not here. 420 00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:23,613 jessa! 421 00:20:23,656 --> 00:20:25,658 all right. 422 00:20:30,097 --> 00:20:31,621 claudia, this isn't a good time. 423 00:20:31,664 --> 00:20:35,842 kaddir kicked me out! 424 00:20:35,886 --> 00:20:37,583 jessa! 425 00:20:46,375 --> 00:20:48,725 so then kaddir didn't actually kick you out. 426 00:20:48,768 --> 00:20:50,335 that's a matter of opinion. 427 00:20:50,379 --> 00:20:51,641 does he know you're gone? 428 00:20:51,684 --> 00:20:53,077 he barely knows i'm alive. 429 00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:54,644 he cut my allowance. 430 00:20:54,687 --> 00:20:56,515 he cut her allowance, honey. 431 00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:58,300 to what, 9,o00 a month? 432 00:20:58,343 --> 00:21:00,693 makes me drive his old jaguar. 433 00:21:00,737 --> 00:21:02,695 some people have worse problems. 434 00:21:02,739 --> 00:21:03,696 [telephone rings] 435 00:21:03,740 --> 00:21:04,697 like who? 436 00:21:04,741 --> 00:21:06,351 people who don't have cars. 437 00:21:06,395 --> 00:21:08,527 who cares about them? 438 00:21:08,571 --> 00:21:10,703 hi, kaddir! Yeah, salaam back at you. 439 00:21:10,747 --> 00:21:12,314 he found your note. 440 00:21:12,357 --> 00:21:13,706 i won't talk to him. 441 00:21:13,750 --> 00:21:14,881 right. She's... 442 00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:17,319 he wanted to know if you were here. 443 00:21:17,362 --> 00:21:18,320 why? 444 00:21:18,363 --> 00:21:19,364 why? 445 00:21:19,408 --> 00:21:20,713 to let you know 446 00:21:20,757 --> 00:21:22,367 he canceled your credit cards. 447 00:21:22,411 --> 00:21:24,369 what? That middle-eastern maggot! 448 00:21:24,413 --> 00:21:26,371 he wants to talk to you. 449 00:21:26,415 --> 00:21:28,199 he can talk to my lawyer! 450 00:21:28,242 --> 00:21:30,723 yes, she's very upset about your love spat. 451 00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:32,377 right. I under-- Uh-huh. 452 00:21:32,421 --> 00:21:33,726 he says he'll forget everything 453 00:21:33,770 --> 00:21:35,685 if you fix dinner for him. 454 00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:38,731 grind some glass!turn down the tv! 455 00:21:38,775 --> 00:21:42,909 kaddir, she's too grief-stricken. Call her back. 456 00:21:42,953 --> 00:21:48,045 hello, kaddir. You listen. I cannot live on that. 457 00:21:48,088 --> 00:21:50,352 i cannot live on that. 458 00:21:50,395 --> 00:21:52,397 do not speak farsi to me, kaddir. 459 00:21:52,441 --> 00:21:54,094 stop it! 460 00:21:54,138 --> 00:21:56,401 that's it. That is it! 461 00:21:56,445 --> 00:21:57,750 i want it. 462 00:21:57,794 --> 00:22:00,579 a duck for dinner. A nice degas painting. 463 00:22:00,623 --> 00:22:02,059 i want--don't! 464 00:22:02,102 --> 00:22:03,669 a divorce. 465 00:22:09,675 --> 00:22:11,460 honey, honey, wait. 466 00:22:11,503 --> 00:22:12,852 she said the "d" word. 467 00:22:12,896 --> 00:22:14,506 she didn't mean it. 468 00:22:14,550 --> 00:22:16,073 shit! She means it every time. 469 00:22:16,116 --> 00:22:17,857 she's going to a hotel. 470 00:22:17,901 --> 00:22:19,816 we're not taking her in. 471 00:22:19,859 --> 00:22:21,818 if your idiot cousins can stay with us, 472 00:22:21,861 --> 00:22:23,820 we can take in my sister 473 00:22:23,863 --> 00:22:26,388 who's been thrown out without a nickel. 474 00:22:26,431 --> 00:22:29,391 jessa, do you have any goodscotch? 475 00:22:44,623 --> 00:22:46,233 put it over here. 476 00:22:47,452 --> 00:22:49,411 a little more this way. 477 00:22:52,109 --> 00:22:55,460 a couple of days, claudia. That's it. 478 00:22:55,504 --> 00:22:58,463 as if I wanted to live in a garret. 479 00:22:58,507 --> 00:23:01,118 now, madam, if you need anything else, 480 00:23:01,161 --> 00:23:03,163 don't hesitate to get it yourself. 481 00:23:03,207 --> 00:23:04,861 get out. 482 00:23:12,259 --> 00:23:14,174 ooh, I missed you. 483 00:23:16,655 --> 00:23:18,483 eee! 484 00:23:18,527 --> 00:23:20,267 mark? 485 00:23:20,311 --> 00:23:22,226 how anybody with half a brain... 486 00:23:22,269 --> 00:23:23,488 eee! 487 00:23:23,532 --> 00:23:25,882 could drop a whole day's worth of film 488 00:23:25,925 --> 00:23:27,884 into the la brea tar pits. 489 00:23:27,927 --> 00:23:28,885 eee, eee! 490 00:23:28,928 --> 00:23:29,886 stop beeping. 491 00:23:29,929 --> 00:23:31,322 shamu hits you once, 492 00:23:31,365 --> 00:23:32,889 you think you're a porpoise. 493 00:23:35,282 --> 00:23:36,545 jessa? 494 00:23:36,588 --> 00:23:38,155 would you go ahead? 495 00:23:38,198 --> 00:23:40,505 i don't want to strain my uterine wall. 496 00:23:40,549 --> 00:23:44,857 eee, eee, eee, eee! 497 00:23:44,901 --> 00:23:45,902 eee! 498 00:23:45,945 --> 00:23:48,687 aah! 499 00:23:48,731 --> 00:23:51,081 aah! 500 00:23:51,124 --> 00:23:54,127 fred, you'll break my dragon! 501 00:23:54,171 --> 00:23:55,128 aah! 502 00:23:55,172 --> 00:23:56,390 aah! 503 00:23:56,434 --> 00:23:58,697 ohh! 504 00:23:58,741 --> 00:24:02,135 i didn't know anybody's eyes could be that red. 505 00:24:02,179 --> 00:24:05,748 what was I supposed to think? They looked insane. 506 00:24:05,791 --> 00:24:10,100 we're not insane. We're from new jersey. 507 00:24:10,143 --> 00:24:12,058 yeah, the garden state. 508 00:24:15,932 --> 00:24:18,151 ooh, deja vu. 509 00:24:18,195 --> 00:24:20,153 you two have the same nose. 510 00:24:20,197 --> 00:24:23,983 they must have had a two-for-one special, huh? 511 00:24:24,027 --> 00:24:24,984 what? 512 00:24:25,028 --> 00:24:27,334 you know, at the chop shop. 513 00:24:27,378 --> 00:24:30,599 i told that butcher not to make it too perfect! 514 00:24:30,642 --> 00:24:32,601 he didn't make it too perfect. 515 00:24:32,644 --> 00:24:34,603 she has some bizarre nose fetish. 516 00:24:34,646 --> 00:24:37,606 see, he left one nostril bigger than the other. 517 00:24:37,649 --> 00:24:39,216 i had a deviated septum. 518 00:24:39,259 --> 00:24:40,565 excuse me. 519 00:24:40,609 --> 00:24:43,046 i was thinking maybe I can interview you two 520 00:24:43,089 --> 00:24:46,702 for this new budget beauty book i'm trying to write. 521 00:24:46,745 --> 00:24:49,095 i'm calling it pretty for peanuts. Get it? 522 00:24:49,139 --> 00:24:51,271 play with the cat, bernice. 523 00:24:51,315 --> 00:24:53,491 where is scruffy? Scruffy bannister! 524 00:24:53,535 --> 00:24:55,058 he was in the kitchen. 525 00:24:55,101 --> 00:24:56,494 it's too perky, isn't it? 526 00:24:56,538 --> 00:24:58,061 no, it's perfect. 527 00:24:58,104 --> 00:25:03,457 aah! 528 00:25:17,254 --> 00:25:19,386 dear god... 529 00:25:19,430 --> 00:25:23,390 here lies the body of scruffy bannister, 530 00:25:23,434 --> 00:25:26,132 our beloved companion. 531 00:25:26,176 --> 00:25:28,700 $42 worth of angelfish. 532 00:25:28,744 --> 00:25:31,703 why don't we just flush it down the toilet? 533 00:25:31,747 --> 00:25:33,183 not our toilet. 534 00:25:35,185 --> 00:25:36,490 why? 535 00:25:36,534 --> 00:25:40,016 why do you always take the good ones? 536 00:25:46,544 --> 00:25:49,634 sleep well, little prince. 537 00:25:53,769 --> 00:25:56,075 [scratching] 538 00:25:58,730 --> 00:26:00,863 [crash] 539 00:26:00,906 --> 00:26:02,995 [glass breaks] 540 00:26:08,261 --> 00:26:10,089 [crash] 541 00:26:13,179 --> 00:26:14,311 mark. 542 00:26:14,354 --> 00:26:16,574 there's something in there. 543 00:26:16,618 --> 00:26:18,228 mark. 544 00:26:18,271 --> 00:26:19,621 you asleep? 545 00:26:25,365 --> 00:26:26,758 god! 546 00:26:55,265 --> 00:26:56,701 [meow] 547 00:26:56,745 --> 00:26:59,443 aah! 548 00:26:59,486 --> 00:27:02,315 honey, honey, look! A dead cat! He's alive! 549 00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:03,882 you all right? 550 00:27:03,926 --> 00:27:05,231 [meow] 551 00:27:05,275 --> 00:27:07,103 he's not in the bag anymore! 552 00:27:07,146 --> 00:27:09,018 i'm carrying an uzi! 553 00:27:11,498 --> 00:27:13,457 scruffy! 554 00:27:13,500 --> 00:27:15,198 oh, baby! 555 00:27:15,241 --> 00:27:17,548 it's a miracle. 556 00:27:17,591 --> 00:27:22,771 oh, mommy's so sorry for burying you alive. 557 00:27:22,814 --> 00:27:24,729 yes, she is. 558 00:27:24,773 --> 00:27:27,732 pee-yoo! Is that you or this kitchen? 559 00:27:31,257 --> 00:27:34,086 anthony, listen to me. Forget tropicorp, ok? 560 00:27:34,130 --> 00:27:36,132 orange juice stock isn't worth a shit 561 00:27:36,175 --> 00:27:37,742 after the cold and flu season. 562 00:27:37,786 --> 00:27:39,788 colorado t & t's coming down. 563 00:27:39,831 --> 00:27:42,138 buy 1,000 shares once it hits bernice. 564 00:27:42,181 --> 00:27:43,139 yeah. What? 565 00:27:43,182 --> 00:27:45,141 i'm sorry. Once it hits 99. 566 00:27:45,184 --> 00:27:46,403 thank you. 567 00:27:46,446 --> 00:27:48,622 uh, mark? Stark wants to see an update 568 00:27:48,666 --> 00:27:50,233 on the grindle portfolio. 569 00:27:50,276 --> 00:27:51,843 oh, yes. 570 00:27:55,107 --> 00:27:56,456 wait a second, pal. 571 00:27:56,500 --> 00:27:57,675 what? 572 00:27:57,719 --> 00:27:58,981 you're shedding. 573 00:27:59,024 --> 00:28:00,983 oh, jesus! It's felix the rat. 574 00:28:01,026 --> 00:28:03,072 i opened a can of peaches. 575 00:28:03,115 --> 00:28:05,074 there was cat hair inside it. 576 00:28:05,117 --> 00:28:06,858 I've been coughing up fur balls. 577 00:28:06,902 --> 00:28:10,122 so when do you get rid of these people? 578 00:28:10,166 --> 00:28:11,123 today! 579 00:28:11,167 --> 00:28:12,864 give me another hug. 580 00:28:12,908 --> 00:28:14,300 when the baby comes, 581 00:28:14,344 --> 00:28:16,476 we'll have to all come visit you again. 582 00:28:16,520 --> 00:28:18,870 or pictures. Pictures are worth a thousand words. 583 00:28:18,914 --> 00:28:21,873 fred's going to have a baby cam during the birth, 584 00:28:21,917 --> 00:28:24,484 but I'm going to cover up my unmentionables. 585 00:28:24,528 --> 00:28:26,791 oh, please do. Please, honey. Bye-bye. 586 00:28:26,835 --> 00:28:29,359 hon, I had so much fun. 587 00:28:29,402 --> 00:28:32,449 i know this wasn't easy for you guys. 588 00:28:32,492 --> 00:28:33,580 oh, no. Come on. 589 00:28:33,624 --> 00:28:36,366 bernice can be a little handful. 590 00:28:36,409 --> 00:28:39,369 you have to visit us in jersey. 591 00:28:39,412 --> 00:28:40,631 we will. 592 00:28:40,674 --> 00:28:43,373 the turnpike's beautiful in spring and fall. 593 00:28:43,416 --> 00:28:44,809 i can't think of anything-- 594 00:28:44,853 --> 00:28:47,464 hey, fred, come say good-bye. 595 00:28:47,507 --> 00:28:49,466 you're going to be late. 596 00:28:49,509 --> 00:28:50,728 you take care. 597 00:28:50,772 --> 00:28:51,773 aah! 598 00:28:55,994 --> 00:28:57,735 i'm on the ground. 599 00:28:57,779 --> 00:28:58,954 honey! 600 00:28:58,997 --> 00:29:00,390 don't touch me. 601 00:29:00,433 --> 00:29:02,044 don't move your head. 602 00:29:02,087 --> 00:29:03,785 honey, you all right? 603 00:29:03,828 --> 00:29:06,396 see if anything fell out. 604 00:29:06,439 --> 00:29:08,180 i'm going to have a flat baby. 605 00:29:08,224 --> 00:29:10,661 i'm going to call my doctor. 606 00:29:10,704 --> 00:29:11,880 no l.a. Quacks. 607 00:29:11,923 --> 00:29:14,665 i need my real doctor. Call Dr. Jack penix. 608 00:29:14,708 --> 00:29:15,884 yeah. Right. 609 00:29:15,927 --> 00:29:17,450 oh, my god! 610 00:29:17,494 --> 00:29:18,800 oh, my god! 611 00:29:18,843 --> 00:29:20,802 i feel the zygote splitting. 612 00:29:20,845 --> 00:29:22,499 i don't want twins! 613 00:29:23,500 --> 00:29:24,849 trenton, new jersey. 614 00:29:24,893 --> 00:29:26,808 for a Dr. Jack penix. 615 00:29:26,851 --> 00:29:28,766 with an "x." 616 00:29:28,810 --> 00:29:29,767 stop it! 617 00:29:29,811 --> 00:29:31,203 it's not my foot. 618 00:29:31,247 --> 00:29:32,639 don't touch me. 619 00:29:32,683 --> 00:29:34,641 get away. Where you going? 620 00:29:34,685 --> 00:29:35,729 yes? 621 00:29:35,773 --> 00:29:38,036 he said to get her to the nearest bed 622 00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,256 as quickly as possible. 623 00:29:41,257 --> 00:29:43,476 ok. That's fine. 624 00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:45,609 it isn't fine. She has to stay here. 625 00:29:45,652 --> 00:29:47,437 yes, of course, she'll stay here. 626 00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:49,439 how long? 627 00:29:49,482 --> 00:29:51,615 for the rest of her pregnancy. 628 00:29:51,658 --> 00:29:52,834 ow! 629 00:29:53,835 --> 00:29:55,358 easy, easy, easy, easy. 630 00:29:55,401 --> 00:29:56,359 oh, god! 631 00:29:56,402 --> 00:29:57,316 oh, god! 632 00:29:57,360 --> 00:30:00,319 i lost all feeling in my womb. 633 00:30:00,363 --> 00:30:03,105 how am I supposed to stay like this 634 00:30:03,148 --> 00:30:05,411 for six months? 635 00:30:05,455 --> 00:30:07,805 this is just stupid. I'm getting my doctor. 636 00:30:07,849 --> 00:30:09,067 no! Never. 637 00:30:09,111 --> 00:30:11,678 i need a man of science, not some ass-lifter. 638 00:30:11,722 --> 00:30:13,985 whatever we do has to be real cheap. 639 00:30:14,029 --> 00:30:15,987 since I lost my job, no... 640 00:30:17,554 --> 00:30:18,685 medical coverage. 641 00:30:27,433 --> 00:30:28,695 hi, Mr. Bannister. 642 00:30:28,739 --> 00:30:30,219 want to bounce? 643 00:30:30,262 --> 00:30:31,611 no, katy. There are laws. 644 00:30:31,655 --> 00:30:33,787 how many times did I tell you 645 00:30:33,831 --> 00:30:36,268 not to play with dolls? 646 00:30:36,312 --> 00:30:38,009 dale. 647 00:30:38,053 --> 00:30:39,924 what's the problem-- Espresso machine down? 648 00:30:39,968 --> 00:30:41,883 no. No, no. 649 00:30:41,926 --> 00:30:44,015 more artichoke leaves down your disposal? 650 00:30:44,059 --> 00:30:45,147 no. 651 00:30:45,190 --> 00:30:48,150 what's the problem? 652 00:30:48,193 --> 00:30:49,151 aah! 653 00:30:49,194 --> 00:30:50,587 how's that, all right? 654 00:30:50,630 --> 00:30:51,980 lower, you ape! 655 00:30:52,023 --> 00:30:53,590 don't get excited, honey. 656 00:30:53,633 --> 00:30:56,593 guess what? I got my first period today. 657 00:30:57,811 --> 00:30:59,683 that oughta do her. 658 00:30:59,726 --> 00:31:01,032 no thanks necessary. 659 00:31:01,076 --> 00:31:03,034 name the bugger after me. 660 00:31:03,078 --> 00:31:04,775 yeah, sluggo bannister. 661 00:31:04,818 --> 00:31:05,863 right. 662 00:31:07,691 --> 00:31:10,650 i feel like a human swing set here. 663 00:31:10,694 --> 00:31:12,304 don't touch that. Aah! 664 00:31:12,348 --> 00:31:15,655 i could drywall her into your basement. 665 00:31:15,699 --> 00:31:18,702 i'll keep that in mind, dale. 666 00:31:24,316 --> 00:31:26,623 we never should have come, pudge. 667 00:31:26,666 --> 00:31:28,581 fred, stop talking like that. 668 00:31:28,625 --> 00:31:31,106 also, please, do me a favor. 669 00:31:31,149 --> 00:31:33,108 don't call me pudge anymore. 670 00:31:33,151 --> 00:31:34,152 ok. 671 00:31:35,762 --> 00:31:37,068 stretch. 672 00:31:37,112 --> 00:31:38,287 look at you. 673 00:31:38,330 --> 00:31:39,810 you're living the life. 674 00:31:39,853 --> 00:31:41,812 you got a nice house, 675 00:31:41,855 --> 00:31:43,118 you paid too much-- 676 00:31:43,161 --> 00:31:44,815 it's still very nice. 677 00:31:44,858 --> 00:31:47,731 the real estate market has gone crazy out here. 678 00:31:47,774 --> 00:31:49,646 you're important at your office. 679 00:31:51,082 --> 00:31:52,997 and you got a wonderful wife. 680 00:31:54,042 --> 00:31:55,173 yeah. 681 00:31:58,350 --> 00:31:59,873 to wonderful wives. 682 00:32:02,615 --> 00:32:04,530 bernice is giving me cancer. 683 00:32:06,750 --> 00:32:09,274 stop talking like that. Listen to yourself. 684 00:32:09,318 --> 00:32:11,624 you let that woman walk all over you. 685 00:32:11,668 --> 00:32:14,279 you got to stand up to her. 686 00:32:14,323 --> 00:32:17,065 what happened to the fred I knew in high school-- 687 00:32:17,108 --> 00:32:20,459 the fred who could have any girl in the senior class, 688 00:32:20,503 --> 00:32:22,026 when he was a freshman, 689 00:32:22,070 --> 00:32:26,291 a guy who could break up any class without trying? 690 00:32:27,771 --> 00:32:29,642 i don't know. 691 00:32:29,686 --> 00:32:31,557 somewhere between graduation 692 00:32:31,601 --> 00:32:33,864 and the jerry lewis telethon... 693 00:32:35,344 --> 00:32:36,780 i just lost it. 694 00:32:38,608 --> 00:32:41,089 ♪ the kind of love that we once shared... ♪ 695 00:32:43,221 --> 00:32:44,222 hear that? 696 00:32:45,658 --> 00:32:46,616 bernadette. 697 00:32:46,659 --> 00:32:47,617 remember her? 698 00:32:47,660 --> 00:32:49,619 what was her last name? 699 00:32:49,662 --> 00:32:51,360 um... Bernadette moizecracken. 700 00:32:51,403 --> 00:32:53,623 her father owned a battery shop. 701 00:32:53,666 --> 00:32:54,624 beverly. 702 00:32:54,667 --> 00:32:56,365 bernadette. Don't you remember? 703 00:32:56,408 --> 00:32:57,453 beverly. 704 00:32:57,496 --> 00:32:58,628 we did the choreography. 705 00:32:58,671 --> 00:33:00,369 you built a dance routine, 706 00:33:00,412 --> 00:33:02,414 started it in gym class. 707 00:33:02,458 --> 00:33:03,807 it started like this-- 708 00:33:03,850 --> 00:33:05,287 the pelvis thrusting thing. 709 00:33:05,330 --> 00:33:07,202 show me how it's done. 710 00:33:07,245 --> 00:33:08,768 you thought it up. 711 00:33:08,812 --> 00:33:11,728 get your hemorrhoids off the bar stool, 712 00:33:11,771 --> 00:33:13,860 show me how it's done. 713 00:33:14,861 --> 00:33:15,862 ♪ bernadette... 714 00:33:16,863 --> 00:33:17,821 hey! 715 00:33:17,864 --> 00:33:18,865 come on. 716 00:33:23,783 --> 00:33:25,220 yeah! 717 00:33:25,263 --> 00:33:28,745 get it in. Get it tight. Get it greasy. 718 00:33:30,877 --> 00:33:33,663 ♪ oh 719 00:33:35,665 --> 00:33:36,796 all right. Come on. 720 00:33:38,059 --> 00:33:41,845 ♪ but, darling, you belong to me ♪ 721 00:33:41,888 --> 00:33:43,586 ♪ I tell the world 722 00:33:43,629 --> 00:33:46,415 ♪ you're part of me 723 00:33:46,458 --> 00:33:47,894 ♪ bernadette 724 00:33:51,681 --> 00:33:53,074 ♪ in you I have 725 00:33:53,117 --> 00:33:56,033 ♪ what other men long for 726 00:33:56,077 --> 00:33:59,950 ♪ all men need someone to worship and adore ♪ 727 00:33:59,993 --> 00:34:02,039 ♪ that's why I treasure you ♪ 728 00:34:02,083 --> 00:34:04,607 ♪ and place you high above ♪ 729 00:34:04,650 --> 00:34:08,567 ♪ for the only joy in life is to be loved ♪ 730 00:34:08,611 --> 00:34:12,745 ♪ so, whatever you do, bernadette ♪ 731 00:34:12,789 --> 00:34:15,313 ♪ keep on lovin' me 732 00:34:15,357 --> 00:34:17,315 ♪ bernadette 733 00:34:17,359 --> 00:34:19,752 ♪ keep on needin' me 734 00:34:19,796 --> 00:34:21,885 ♪ bernadette... 735 00:34:21,928 --> 00:34:24,670 clear for takeoff. 736 00:34:27,630 --> 00:34:29,022 ♪ bernadette 737 00:34:29,066 --> 00:34:30,720 ♪ bernadette 738 00:34:30,763 --> 00:34:32,983 ♪ you're the soul of me 739 00:34:33,026 --> 00:34:34,637 ♪ you're the dream 740 00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:37,466 ♪ you're the prayer to me ♪ 741 00:34:37,509 --> 00:34:39,032 ♪ and bernadette 742 00:34:39,076 --> 00:34:41,644 ♪ you mean more to me 743 00:34:41,687 --> 00:34:45,430 ♪ than a woman was ever meant to be ♪♪ 744 00:34:46,953 --> 00:34:47,911 ha ha ha! 745 00:34:47,954 --> 00:34:48,868 little rusty. 746 00:34:48,912 --> 00:34:51,349 took me awhile to get going. 747 00:34:51,393 --> 00:34:53,917 what you have, you don't lose. 748 00:34:56,702 --> 00:34:58,748 way to go. 749 00:35:03,056 --> 00:35:04,580 jessie! 750 00:35:04,623 --> 00:35:06,190 what?he's gone. 751 00:35:06,234 --> 00:35:08,714 who's gone?fred's gone! 752 00:35:08,758 --> 00:35:11,369 I've been abandoned. 753 00:35:11,413 --> 00:35:12,370 no, wait. 754 00:35:12,414 --> 00:35:14,633 we don't know that for sure. 755 00:35:14,677 --> 00:35:16,069 "i went to find 756 00:35:16,113 --> 00:35:19,072 the fred bannister I used to be." 757 00:35:19,116 --> 00:35:20,813 where did he get that crap? 758 00:35:26,254 --> 00:35:27,342 fred! 759 00:35:29,996 --> 00:35:31,824 fred! 760 00:35:39,658 --> 00:35:44,794 [echoing] fred! Fred! 761 00:35:44,837 --> 00:35:46,752 what did you tell him? 762 00:35:46,796 --> 00:35:48,232 i didn't tell him anything. 763 00:35:48,276 --> 00:35:51,235 i said he should stand up for himself. 764 00:35:51,279 --> 00:35:53,585 you saw what a wreck he was. 765 00:35:53,629 --> 00:35:55,152 he was her wreck. 766 00:35:55,196 --> 00:35:57,720 she liked him like that. 767 00:35:57,763 --> 00:36:00,070 she craves human sacrifice, and he was it. 768 00:36:00,113 --> 00:36:01,811 let's just call the police. 769 00:36:01,854 --> 00:36:04,814 a guy leaves his wife. They'll rush over. 770 00:36:04,857 --> 00:36:06,250 let's hire a detective. 771 00:36:06,294 --> 00:36:07,817 we can't afford that. 772 00:36:07,860 --> 00:36:09,645 maybe claudia can watch bernice 773 00:36:09,688 --> 00:36:11,255 while we're at work. 774 00:36:11,299 --> 00:36:14,171 your sister would smother the woman in her sleep. 775 00:36:19,307 --> 00:36:20,699 mark! Oh, mark! 776 00:36:20,743 --> 00:36:24,399 how the hell am I supposed to pee? 777 00:36:36,411 --> 00:36:38,848 you deal with your evil twin. 778 00:36:42,721 --> 00:36:44,419 don't make me do this. 779 00:36:44,462 --> 00:36:47,073 wouldn't you, just this once, 780 00:36:47,117 --> 00:36:49,641 like to handle something like an adult? 781 00:36:49,685 --> 00:36:51,643 no. 782 00:36:51,687 --> 00:36:53,036 pouting makes wrinkles. 783 00:36:53,079 --> 00:36:54,603 jessa, please. 784 00:36:54,646 --> 00:36:57,040 by the end of the week, 785 00:36:57,083 --> 00:36:59,564 he'll be on his knees begging. 786 00:37:08,181 --> 00:37:11,620 that gate was not here yesterday. 787 00:37:11,663 --> 00:37:13,317 neither was slaughter security. 788 00:37:17,887 --> 00:37:19,802 kaddir, this is jessie. 789 00:37:19,845 --> 00:37:22,631 i know you can hear me. 790 00:37:22,674 --> 00:37:25,286 it took a lot for claudia to come here 791 00:37:25,329 --> 00:37:27,636 and try and work this out. 792 00:37:27,679 --> 00:37:29,638 she deserves a little credit. 793 00:37:29,681 --> 00:37:32,205 [speaking farsi] 794 00:37:32,249 --> 00:37:36,122 that's the last thing in the world she needs. 795 00:37:36,166 --> 00:37:37,559 she bleeds me dry. 796 00:37:37,602 --> 00:37:38,777 you want to see blood? 797 00:37:38,821 --> 00:37:40,779 let me in, I'll slash your throat. 798 00:37:40,823 --> 00:37:43,608 try to come in, i'll sell you to bedouins. 799 00:37:43,652 --> 00:37:44,696 that's it. 800 00:37:44,740 --> 00:37:47,525 don't you choke my cherub. 801 00:37:47,569 --> 00:37:48,700 kaddir, claudia loves you. 802 00:37:48,744 --> 00:37:50,093 i do not! 803 00:37:50,136 --> 00:37:51,181 you do, too. 804 00:37:55,838 --> 00:37:59,015 i think you can see hydrolux is a real comer. 805 00:37:59,058 --> 00:38:00,495 they're young, 806 00:38:00,538 --> 00:38:02,323 but they've got the trust of the state department, 807 00:38:02,366 --> 00:38:05,587 and they've just acquired a major contract from the navy. 808 00:38:05,630 --> 00:38:08,633 i'd like to make them the cornerstone of your new portfolio. 809 00:38:08,677 --> 00:38:10,461 navy, huh? 810 00:38:10,505 --> 00:38:12,507 i was a swabbie once myself. 811 00:38:12,550 --> 00:38:15,031 no? 812 00:38:15,074 --> 00:38:16,685 excuse me, mark. 813 00:38:16,728 --> 00:38:18,600 line two's for you.i'll call back. 814 00:38:18,643 --> 00:38:20,689 i think you ought to take this. 815 00:38:20,732 --> 00:38:22,821 she says it's an emergency. 816 00:38:22,865 --> 00:38:24,040 oh. 817 00:38:24,083 --> 00:38:25,650 excuse me. 818 00:38:26,956 --> 00:38:28,479 hello. 819 00:38:28,523 --> 00:38:29,828 bernice, what-- 820 00:38:29,872 --> 00:38:34,050 i don't know what time wheel of fortuneis on. 821 00:38:34,093 --> 00:38:37,009 i left the tv guide on the dresser. 822 00:38:37,053 --> 00:38:40,404 yes, I realize you're in chains. 823 00:38:40,448 --> 00:38:42,363 could you please just try-- 824 00:38:42,406 --> 00:38:43,625 good-bye. 825 00:38:44,974 --> 00:38:46,584 sorry. 826 00:38:46,628 --> 00:38:47,672 that was an emergency? 827 00:38:47,716 --> 00:38:49,326 well, yes, actually. 828 00:38:49,370 --> 00:38:52,590 in some warped, alternate universe. 829 00:39:03,775 --> 00:39:05,995 bernice: not so fast, missy! 830 00:39:06,038 --> 00:39:09,172 it's time to shift my butt! 831 00:39:18,747 --> 00:39:21,010 zoom, zoom, zoom. 832 00:39:21,053 --> 00:39:22,054 aah! 833 00:39:24,056 --> 00:39:25,493 mark! 834 00:39:30,802 --> 00:39:31,760 ow! 835 00:39:31,803 --> 00:39:33,588 mark! 836 00:39:33,631 --> 00:39:35,503 jessie! 837 00:39:40,116 --> 00:39:41,683 move to the right. 838 00:39:41,726 --> 00:39:43,336 you're blowing my coiffure 839 00:39:43,380 --> 00:39:44,773 all over the place. 840 00:39:44,816 --> 00:39:48,777 oh, look! A bust of my pussy! 841 00:39:48,820 --> 00:39:51,736 it's so majestic. I gotta have it. 842 00:39:52,824 --> 00:39:54,304 an iced tea. 843 00:39:54,347 --> 00:39:55,784 with lemon. 844 00:39:55,827 --> 00:39:58,134 in a nice glass. 845 00:39:58,177 --> 00:39:59,135 stemware! 846 00:39:59,178 --> 00:40:02,704 [water drips] 847 00:40:02,747 --> 00:40:06,185 jiggle the handle. 848 00:40:06,229 --> 00:40:07,709 how do you handle stress? 849 00:40:07,752 --> 00:40:10,363 take a fistful of valium. 850 00:40:10,407 --> 00:40:11,408 i get drunk. 851 00:40:11,452 --> 00:40:13,802 real drunk. 852 00:40:13,845 --> 00:40:15,804 polka! Polka! 853 00:40:15,847 --> 00:40:17,240 bust somebody... 854 00:40:17,283 --> 00:40:18,284 anybody. 855 00:40:19,416 --> 00:40:20,809 pump iron. 856 00:40:20,852 --> 00:40:23,376 meditation. 857 00:40:23,420 --> 00:40:25,291 sex. 858 00:40:25,335 --> 00:40:26,597 excuse me, sir. 859 00:40:26,641 --> 00:40:28,773 wait a second. No camera. 860 00:40:28,817 --> 00:40:30,601 we're from channel 12 news. 861 00:40:30,645 --> 00:40:33,648 we're doing a survey. How do you handle stress? 862 00:40:33,691 --> 00:40:35,345 usually i, uh... 863 00:40:35,388 --> 00:40:37,347 find the source of the stress 864 00:40:37,390 --> 00:40:39,958 and break his legs. 865 00:40:41,873 --> 00:40:42,918 how much-- 866 00:40:42,961 --> 00:40:45,529 how much does something like cost? 867 00:40:45,573 --> 00:40:46,835 it all depends 868 00:40:46,878 --> 00:40:48,750 on how much stress is involved. 869 00:40:48,793 --> 00:40:50,099 usually about $200. 870 00:40:50,142 --> 00:40:52,580 what could you get for 100? 871 00:40:52,623 --> 00:40:53,581 100? 872 00:40:53,624 --> 00:40:55,278 a kneecap or something. 873 00:40:55,321 --> 00:40:56,801 200 is usually the rate. 874 00:40:56,845 --> 00:40:58,411 what if that's your budget? 875 00:40:58,455 --> 00:40:59,848 what could you get? 876 00:40:59,891 --> 00:41:01,850 if you're having money problems, 877 00:41:01,893 --> 00:41:04,156 you could do something like this. 878 00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:06,245 i also produce independent films. 879 00:41:06,289 --> 00:41:08,552 i couldn't do anything like that. 880 00:41:08,596 --> 00:41:10,641 you got a good look. 881 00:41:10,685 --> 00:41:13,252 this could be a beautiful thing. 882 00:41:13,296 --> 00:41:14,253 ok, thanks. 883 00:41:14,297 --> 00:41:16,560 you know where to find me. 884 00:41:16,604 --> 00:41:19,215 cut that last part. 885 00:41:24,307 --> 00:41:25,351 [knock on door] 886 00:41:25,395 --> 00:41:26,352 come in. 887 00:41:26,396 --> 00:41:27,353 what's that? 888 00:41:27,397 --> 00:41:28,529 strategy. 889 00:41:28,572 --> 00:41:30,574 there are plenty of old acquaintances 890 00:41:30,618 --> 00:41:33,490 dying to sweep me off my feet. 891 00:41:33,534 --> 00:41:35,057 ranked in financial order? 892 00:41:35,100 --> 00:41:37,625 this is no time to beat around the bush. 893 00:41:37,668 --> 00:41:39,409 what is that asterisk? 894 00:41:40,410 --> 00:41:41,672 over 80. 895 00:41:41,716 --> 00:41:43,195 don't you think 896 00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:44,806 you could give kaddir another chance? 897 00:41:44,849 --> 00:41:48,505 he tried to crush me with his automatic gate. 898 00:41:48,549 --> 00:41:50,333 i think he made his feelings quite clear. 899 00:41:50,376 --> 00:41:51,334 [tires screech] 900 00:41:51,377 --> 00:41:52,378 [meow] 901 00:41:55,294 --> 00:41:56,252 jonathan. 902 00:41:56,295 --> 00:41:57,601 hi, mom. 903 00:41:57,645 --> 00:41:58,602 hi, honey. 904 00:41:58,646 --> 00:42:00,256 hi, aunt jess. 905 00:42:00,299 --> 00:42:01,649 is kaddir ready to apologize? 906 00:42:01,692 --> 00:42:03,259 he threw me out. 907 00:42:03,302 --> 00:42:04,260 damn! 908 00:42:04,303 --> 00:42:05,827 anyway... 909 00:42:05,870 --> 00:42:08,394 uncle mark? 910 00:42:08,438 --> 00:42:10,745 i need a place to crash. 911 00:42:10,788 --> 00:42:12,485 this is not a good time. 912 00:42:12,529 --> 00:42:15,532 of course you can stay here, darling. 913 00:42:15,576 --> 00:42:16,533 thanks. 914 00:42:16,577 --> 00:42:17,839 uncle mark, um... 915 00:42:17,882 --> 00:42:19,754 yes, jonathan. 916 00:42:19,797 --> 00:42:22,713 i think I just ran over your cat. 917 00:42:30,634 --> 00:42:32,244 dear god, 918 00:42:32,288 --> 00:42:36,161 here lies the body of scruffy bannister. 919 00:42:36,205 --> 00:42:38,555 and this time it's for real. 920 00:42:39,687 --> 00:42:41,384 in your infinite wisdom, 921 00:42:41,427 --> 00:42:45,780 you saw fit to give him back to me once, 922 00:42:45,823 --> 00:42:47,651 but you ripped him from my bosom again. 923 00:42:50,828 --> 00:42:52,482 what you guys doing? 924 00:42:52,525 --> 00:42:53,701 cat funeral. 925 00:42:53,744 --> 00:42:55,050 can I have him? 926 00:42:55,093 --> 00:42:56,225 no. 927 00:42:56,268 --> 00:42:58,096 what would you do with a dead cat? 928 00:42:58,140 --> 00:43:00,795 i'll keep him in the freezer till school starts. 929 00:43:00,838 --> 00:43:02,971 you disgusting little ghoul. 930 00:43:03,014 --> 00:43:04,581 who are you, its mother? 931 00:43:06,409 --> 00:43:07,671 ow! 932 00:43:07,715 --> 00:43:08,803 and get me out 933 00:43:08,846 --> 00:43:11,806 of this little piece of hell on earth 934 00:43:11,849 --> 00:43:13,503 you call california. 935 00:43:13,546 --> 00:43:14,678 amen. 936 00:43:29,737 --> 00:43:30,694 [meow] 937 00:43:31,869 --> 00:43:32,957 [meow] 938 00:43:33,001 --> 00:43:36,439 i'll kill you again, kitty litter breath. 939 00:43:36,482 --> 00:43:39,442 jerram, I understand. 940 00:43:39,485 --> 00:43:40,748 some other time then. 941 00:43:40,791 --> 00:43:41,749 right. 942 00:43:41,792 --> 00:43:42,967 bye. 943 00:43:44,055 --> 00:43:46,014 you pathetic worm. 944 00:43:46,057 --> 00:43:47,929 not going so well, huh? 945 00:43:47,972 --> 00:43:49,626 married. Turned gay. 946 00:43:49,670 --> 00:43:52,150 married. In jail-- Malpractice. 947 00:43:52,194 --> 00:43:53,412 dead! 948 00:43:53,456 --> 00:43:54,762 marriage material's getting tough to find. 949 00:43:54,805 --> 00:43:57,242 claudia. 950 00:43:57,286 --> 00:44:01,812 what would you say to a nice, handsome, divorced car dealer? 951 00:44:01,856 --> 00:44:04,032 foreign or domestic? 952 00:44:07,644 --> 00:44:10,255 you think you can foist me off 953 00:44:10,299 --> 00:44:11,735 on some total stranger, 954 00:44:11,779 --> 00:44:14,912 but I'm telling you, if I don't like-- 955 00:44:14,956 --> 00:44:16,653 is that his? 956 00:44:18,220 --> 00:44:19,525 lead on. 957 00:44:27,577 --> 00:44:29,405 here she is. 958 00:44:31,146 --> 00:44:33,191 well, hello. 959 00:44:33,235 --> 00:44:36,804 jess says you and your boy need a place to stay. 960 00:44:41,722 --> 00:44:43,680 that's right. 961 00:44:43,724 --> 00:44:44,768 be my guest. 962 00:44:51,688 --> 00:44:52,994 i can't believe it. 963 00:44:53,037 --> 00:44:55,692 they were like two sex magnets 964 00:44:55,736 --> 00:44:58,695 straining not to slam into each other. 965 00:44:58,739 --> 00:45:00,001 i know the feeling. 966 00:45:00,044 --> 00:45:01,785 let's make love. 967 00:45:01,829 --> 00:45:03,091 we'll start right here 968 00:45:03,134 --> 00:45:05,267 and wind up in the begonias. 969 00:45:05,310 --> 00:45:07,182 whoo! 970 00:45:07,225 --> 00:45:08,792 what about bernice? 971 00:45:08,836 --> 00:45:10,794 i threw some raw meat in. 972 00:45:10,838 --> 00:45:11,882 she'll be fine. 973 00:45:17,192 --> 00:45:19,150 i can't believe you're old enough 974 00:45:19,194 --> 00:45:20,412 to be jonathan's mom. 975 00:45:20,456 --> 00:45:21,457 i'm not. 976 00:45:25,113 --> 00:45:28,725 huge neighborhood scandal, the nuns... 977 00:45:33,817 --> 00:45:34,775 something burning? 978 00:45:34,818 --> 00:45:35,863 hmm? 979 00:45:45,220 --> 00:45:47,788 dad, can we get some marshmallows? 980 00:45:47,831 --> 00:45:48,789 shut up. 981 00:45:48,832 --> 00:45:50,747 i cannot believe it. 982 00:45:50,791 --> 00:45:52,662 16 pairs of italian pumps incinerated. 983 00:45:52,705 --> 00:45:55,404 c.k., you get those fireworks out of there? 984 00:45:55,447 --> 00:45:56,448 yeah. 985 00:45:59,016 --> 00:46:00,409 well... 986 00:46:00,452 --> 00:46:01,802 most of them. 987 00:46:03,107 --> 00:46:04,674 oh! 988 00:46:04,717 --> 00:46:06,676 my tools. 989 00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:07,851 my tools. 990 00:46:07,895 --> 00:46:09,244 your tools? My shoes. 991 00:46:09,287 --> 00:46:10,767 back off, gold card. 992 00:46:10,811 --> 00:46:12,769 i just lost my goddamn house. 993 00:46:12,813 --> 00:46:14,075 what's the big fuss? 994 00:46:14,118 --> 00:46:17,165 even a cretin like you must have insurance. 995 00:46:17,208 --> 00:46:19,776 it ought to kick in in three months. 996 00:46:19,820 --> 00:46:21,169 what about my kids? 997 00:46:21,212 --> 00:46:25,173 send them to a hotel. Anyone who owns a lotus-- 998 00:46:25,216 --> 00:46:27,828 it's a perk for selling them. 999 00:46:27,871 --> 00:46:32,833 so, bannister, what are wegoing to do about this? 1000 00:46:40,797 --> 00:46:43,756 make sure fangster stays in his box. 1001 00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:46,194 waste of a good belt. 1002 00:46:49,110 --> 00:46:51,764 put that stuff down. Get me a scotch. 1003 00:46:51,808 --> 00:46:53,331 just make yourself comfortable. 1004 00:46:54,637 --> 00:46:56,639 rhonda, you won't believe it. 1005 00:46:56,682 --> 00:46:58,032 our house burned down. 1006 00:46:58,075 --> 00:47:00,686 these are all I could find. 1007 00:47:00,730 --> 00:47:03,080 fine. Just give them to somebody. 1008 00:47:03,124 --> 00:47:04,995 we don't have to do this. 1009 00:47:05,039 --> 00:47:06,605 yes, we do 1010 00:47:06,649 --> 00:47:10,696 if we want to avoid a lawsuit for arson. 1011 00:47:10,740 --> 00:47:12,873 does this fold out? 1012 00:47:29,150 --> 00:47:30,716 hey, Mr. Bannister, 1013 00:47:30,760 --> 00:47:32,414 guess what didn't burn up? 1014 00:47:35,199 --> 00:47:37,158 i'm calling about the room 1015 00:47:37,201 --> 00:47:38,768 for $300 a month. 1016 00:47:38,811 --> 00:47:39,595 it is? 1017 00:47:39,638 --> 00:47:40,596 terrific. 1018 00:47:40,639 --> 00:47:42,250 um, immediately. 1019 00:47:42,293 --> 00:47:44,252 um... 1020 00:47:44,295 --> 00:47:45,949 seven people. 1021 00:47:45,993 --> 00:47:48,082 uh-huh. That's great, phil. 1022 00:47:48,125 --> 00:47:49,692 by the way, 1023 00:47:49,735 --> 00:47:52,086 what's happening with your guest house? 1024 00:47:52,129 --> 00:47:55,698 uh-huh. How long is she expected to live? 1025 00:47:55,741 --> 00:47:58,005 i'm sorry. I'm sorry. 1026 00:47:58,048 --> 00:48:00,137 i'm sorry. 1027 00:48:00,181 --> 00:48:02,400 you hang up first. 1028 00:48:02,444 --> 00:48:04,402 no. You. 1029 00:48:04,446 --> 00:48:05,577 brenda. 1030 00:48:05,621 --> 00:48:07,579 i can hear you breathing. 1031 00:48:07,623 --> 00:48:09,233 jonathan, did your grandmother 1032 00:48:09,277 --> 00:48:11,148 send you a birthday check? 1033 00:48:11,192 --> 00:48:12,584 grandma's dead, mom. 1034 00:48:12,628 --> 00:48:15,152 no, brenda. You hang up first. 1035 00:48:15,196 --> 00:48:16,980 no, you. 1036 00:48:17,024 --> 00:48:17,981 brenda. 1037 00:48:18,025 --> 00:48:20,592 hey, did they get another cat? 1038 00:48:20,636 --> 00:48:22,594 no, it's the same one. 1039 00:48:22,638 --> 00:48:24,596 they buried him alive. Cool. 1040 00:48:24,640 --> 00:48:27,251 don't you be getting any ideas. 1041 00:48:27,295 --> 00:48:30,602 but if they can bury him, I can, too. 1042 00:48:30,646 --> 00:48:34,258 you get permission first. 1043 00:48:34,302 --> 00:48:35,477 no.no. 1044 00:48:35,520 --> 00:48:38,262 bernice: don't worry about me having dinner! 1045 00:48:38,306 --> 00:48:40,438 i'll just lick the crumbs 1046 00:48:40,482 --> 00:48:42,832 off my filthy sheets! 1047 00:49:06,682 --> 00:49:08,553 yoo-hoo. 1048 00:49:08,597 --> 00:49:12,688 aah! 1049 00:49:22,785 --> 00:49:24,178 whoa! 1050 00:49:24,221 --> 00:49:25,396 jessie! 1051 00:49:25,440 --> 00:49:26,397 what is it? 1052 00:49:26,441 --> 00:49:27,746 don't look in there. 1053 00:49:27,790 --> 00:49:29,400 what do they want? 1054 00:49:29,444 --> 00:49:30,401 they want... 1055 00:49:30,445 --> 00:49:31,837 to stay here. 1056 00:49:31,881 --> 00:49:33,404 why, mark, why? 1057 00:49:33,448 --> 00:49:36,799 maybe we're in some vacation guide for the damned. 1058 00:49:38,670 --> 00:49:41,151 aah! 1059 00:49:41,195 --> 00:49:42,500 help! Mark! 1060 00:49:42,544 --> 00:49:43,849 i got them. 1061 00:49:43,893 --> 00:49:45,503 oh, god. Oh, god. 1062 00:49:45,547 --> 00:49:47,027 get out! 1063 00:49:47,070 --> 00:49:48,767 oh, aah! 1064 00:49:48,811 --> 00:49:49,725 oh, mark. 1065 00:49:55,513 --> 00:49:57,820 who the hell dressed you people? 1066 00:49:57,863 --> 00:50:01,780 get out of my hou... 1067 00:50:01,824 --> 00:50:02,912 no! 1068 00:50:02,955 --> 00:50:03,913 no. 1069 00:50:03,956 --> 00:50:05,175 jessie, run. 1070 00:50:05,219 --> 00:50:06,829 leave her. 1071 00:50:08,135 --> 00:50:09,919 leave--leave her alone. 1072 00:50:09,962 --> 00:50:11,921 jess. Leave jessie. 1073 00:50:13,140 --> 00:50:14,402 oh. 1074 00:50:21,235 --> 00:50:23,237 take bernice. 1075 00:50:23,280 --> 00:50:24,716 there's no more. Don't. 1076 00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:27,458 i don't have any more guest towels. 1077 00:50:27,502 --> 00:50:30,418 i don't have any more towels. 1078 00:50:31,854 --> 00:50:33,073 mark. 1079 00:50:33,116 --> 00:50:36,424 honey, I know you're frustrated. 1080 00:50:37,642 --> 00:50:40,993 oh, god. Honey. I'm not in the mood. Just-- 1081 00:50:41,037 --> 00:50:42,169 what? 1082 00:50:42,212 --> 00:50:43,648 je-jessie? 1083 00:50:43,692 --> 00:50:44,649 hmm? 1084 00:50:44,693 --> 00:50:46,695 i'm way over here. What? 1085 00:50:49,654 --> 00:50:53,484 aah! 1086 00:51:02,406 --> 00:51:05,148 have you guys seen fangster? 1087 00:51:50,454 --> 00:51:51,760 mark. 1088 00:51:51,803 --> 00:51:53,675 what? 1089 00:51:53,718 --> 00:51:56,852 we have to do something about these people. 1090 00:52:01,509 --> 00:52:03,554 yes. Uh-huh. 1091 00:52:03,598 --> 00:52:05,252 i have only one question. 1092 00:52:05,295 --> 00:52:07,993 do they all have to pass out flowers 1093 00:52:08,037 --> 00:52:09,604 at the airport? 1094 00:52:09,647 --> 00:52:10,605 uh-huh. 1095 00:52:10,648 --> 00:52:12,737 and shave their heads? 1096 00:52:12,781 --> 00:52:14,043 thank you. 1097 00:52:15,871 --> 00:52:17,089 [knock knock] 1098 00:52:18,656 --> 00:52:20,005 hi. 1099 00:52:20,049 --> 00:52:21,268 what are you doing here? 1100 00:52:21,311 --> 00:52:24,923 look, uncle mark, I've been watching you, 1101 00:52:24,967 --> 00:52:27,361 having to take care of all of us. 1102 00:52:27,404 --> 00:52:30,755 and, um... So I'm job-hunting. 1103 00:52:30,799 --> 00:52:32,975 and I thought, maybe... 1104 00:52:33,018 --> 00:52:36,021 i was wondering if, uh... 1105 00:52:37,109 --> 00:52:38,067 you know. 1106 00:52:38,110 --> 00:52:40,722 you mean, something here? 1107 00:52:40,765 --> 00:52:41,810 ooh. 1108 00:52:41,853 --> 00:52:43,594 i don't think so, jonathan. 1109 00:52:43,638 --> 00:52:44,987 well, that's cool. 1110 00:52:45,030 --> 00:52:48,164 i just wanted to get my own place. 1111 00:52:48,208 --> 00:52:50,297 i'll call personnel. 1112 00:52:50,340 --> 00:52:52,951 well, no special treatment or anything. 1113 00:52:52,995 --> 00:52:56,259 i'll start anywhere. The mail room would be great. 1114 00:52:56,303 --> 00:52:59,175 frank, this is my nephew jonathan. 1115 00:52:59,219 --> 00:53:02,091 take good care of him, ok? 1116 00:53:02,134 --> 00:53:03,658 welcome aboard, jonathan. 1117 00:53:03,701 --> 00:53:06,530 wow. Great stamps. 1118 00:53:06,574 --> 00:53:07,879 i got a collection. 1119 00:53:07,923 --> 00:53:10,969 good. If you need anything, you call me. 1120 00:53:11,013 --> 00:53:12,362 my mom was wrong. 1121 00:53:12,406 --> 00:53:14,538 you're not an asshole. 1122 00:53:14,582 --> 00:53:17,062 i-i'll be out of your hair 1123 00:53:17,106 --> 00:53:18,412 in no time. 1124 00:53:19,674 --> 00:53:22,067 hi. Bernice. Hi, yes. 1125 00:53:22,111 --> 00:53:24,113 how are you? Good. 1126 00:53:24,156 --> 00:53:26,811 yeah, I want the wings of the night. 1127 00:53:26,855 --> 00:53:28,813 my nails go with it. 1128 00:53:28,857 --> 00:53:30,337 oh, I lost one. 1129 00:53:30,380 --> 00:53:32,469 yeah, send it c.o.d., hon. 1130 00:53:32,513 --> 00:53:35,080 oh, yeah, toot-toot from me. 1131 00:53:35,124 --> 00:53:36,995 ok. Bye-bye, hon. 1132 00:53:37,039 --> 00:53:40,347 jessa, what pumps do you wear with this? 1133 00:53:40,390 --> 00:53:43,393 no, that's pee for Dr. Penix' test. 1134 00:53:43,437 --> 00:53:45,177 he's checking the ovum count. 1135 00:53:45,221 --> 00:53:48,485 you want me to mail urine to new jersey? 1136 00:53:48,529 --> 00:53:50,531 would you? 1137 00:53:50,574 --> 00:53:53,055 um, wait, wait. 1138 00:53:53,098 --> 00:53:54,448 i need your opinion. 1139 00:53:54,491 --> 00:53:56,754 these are my favorite names for the baby-- 1140 00:53:56,798 --> 00:54:01,890 amaretta, endive, caramel, or treblinka. 1141 00:54:01,933 --> 00:54:05,328 yokel. Naming a baby after a german concentration camp. 1142 00:54:05,372 --> 00:54:08,375 i thought treblinka was a fairy in cinderella. 1143 00:54:08,418 --> 00:54:10,159 you moron. 1144 00:54:10,202 --> 00:54:13,293 i hope my water breaks on your fur coat! 1145 00:54:34,923 --> 00:54:37,882 you ok? 1146 00:54:37,926 --> 00:54:39,884 remember when that was our room? 1147 00:54:39,928 --> 00:54:41,538 yes, I know, 1148 00:54:41,582 --> 00:54:43,714 in the days before time. 1149 00:54:43,758 --> 00:54:45,063 baby... 1150 00:54:45,107 --> 00:54:46,804 i hate those people. 1151 00:54:46,848 --> 00:54:50,155 jonathan got a job. It's going to get better. 1152 00:55:00,078 --> 00:55:03,081 right now, it's you and me, all alone... 1153 00:55:03,125 --> 00:55:06,128 right here, in the closet. 1154 00:55:06,171 --> 00:55:07,521 [meowrrr] 1155 00:55:09,958 --> 00:55:11,438 there. 1156 00:55:11,481 --> 00:55:15,877 i don't think he'll be coming back this time. 1157 00:55:15,920 --> 00:55:19,054 what does the c.k. Stand for anyway? 1158 00:55:19,097 --> 00:55:20,098 confirmed kills, 1159 00:55:20,142 --> 00:55:23,058 but I might change it to cat killer. 1160 00:55:23,101 --> 00:55:24,407 what do you think? 1161 00:55:24,451 --> 00:55:26,714 i think we have a problem. 1162 00:55:26,757 --> 00:55:27,715 c.k., 1163 00:55:27,758 --> 00:55:29,456 do you know what happens 1164 00:55:29,499 --> 00:55:31,545 when you cram too many laboratory rats 1165 00:55:31,588 --> 00:55:33,155 into the same cage? 1166 00:55:33,198 --> 00:55:35,244 they turn into fags. 1167 00:55:35,287 --> 00:55:37,551 some do. Others turn into cannibals. 1168 00:55:37,594 --> 00:55:39,248 they tear each other apart. 1169 00:55:39,291 --> 00:55:41,990 minimizing the space by blowing rooms apart 1170 00:55:42,033 --> 00:55:43,557 really aggravates the situation. 1171 00:55:43,600 --> 00:55:45,907 it's just so boring here. 1172 00:55:45,950 --> 00:55:48,083 listen, you psychotic little shit. 1173 00:55:48,126 --> 00:55:49,476 get your act together, 1174 00:55:49,519 --> 00:55:53,175 or you'll be a face on a milk carton. 1175 00:55:53,218 --> 00:55:55,438 you touch me, I sue you. 1176 00:55:55,482 --> 00:55:58,223 i got a lawyer on retainer. 1177 00:56:00,922 --> 00:56:02,402 [meow] 1178 00:56:03,968 --> 00:56:05,927 [knock on door] 1179 00:56:05,970 --> 00:56:07,537 hi, hi.hi, honey. 1180 00:56:07,581 --> 00:56:10,627 hear that noise outside? C.k.'s mowing the lawn. 1181 00:56:10,671 --> 00:56:12,977 all he needed was some discipline, 1182 00:56:13,021 --> 00:56:14,326 some positive motivation. 1183 00:56:16,024 --> 00:56:17,721 we can control this situation, 1184 00:56:17,765 --> 00:56:20,071 be the captains of our destiny. 1185 00:56:20,115 --> 00:56:21,464 things are looking up. 1186 00:56:21,508 --> 00:56:23,814 i think this will work out, 1187 00:56:23,858 --> 00:56:24,989 don't you? 1188 00:56:28,602 --> 00:56:29,864 yeah. 1189 00:56:29,907 --> 00:56:31,126 yeah. 1190 00:56:34,608 --> 00:56:36,044 shoot them. 1191 00:56:36,087 --> 00:56:37,349 strangle them. 1192 00:56:37,393 --> 00:56:38,873 cook them in the oven! 1193 00:56:38,916 --> 00:56:41,092 hide his medication.huh? What? 1194 00:56:41,136 --> 00:56:42,485 kindness. 1195 00:56:42,529 --> 00:56:43,486 oh -- 1196 00:56:43,530 --> 00:56:44,531 [bleep] 1197 00:56:44,574 --> 00:56:47,185 they have a clean bill of health? 1198 00:56:47,229 --> 00:56:49,579 then I guess i'd use insulin. 1199 00:56:49,623 --> 00:56:51,929 inject 30 ccs into a freckle. 1200 00:56:51,973 --> 00:56:53,583 bingo. All the symptoms 1201 00:56:53,627 --> 00:56:55,106 of a massive coronary. 1202 00:56:55,150 --> 00:56:57,979 a hammer, definitely a hammer. 1203 00:56:58,022 --> 00:57:00,982 i don't know, clorox in the bean dip? 1204 00:57:06,988 --> 00:57:08,729 jessie, we're back. 1205 00:57:10,905 --> 00:57:12,863 how would you murder someone? 1206 00:57:12,907 --> 00:57:15,866 if you have a question, los angeles... 1207 00:57:17,564 --> 00:57:18,913 ask somebody else. 1208 00:57:18,956 --> 00:57:22,264 i swear to god, I don't know the answers. 1209 00:57:22,307 --> 00:57:24,092 i don't know anything. 1210 00:57:24,135 --> 00:57:27,095 well, that's quite an interesting question, jessica. 1211 00:57:27,138 --> 00:57:29,445 i'm sure that's crossed everybody's mind 1212 00:57:29,489 --> 00:57:31,099 now and then. 1213 00:57:31,142 --> 00:57:33,101 how would you murder someone? 1214 00:57:33,144 --> 00:57:36,104 if you were desperate to get rid of them 1215 00:57:36,147 --> 00:57:38,106 because they were driving you 1216 00:57:38,149 --> 00:57:41,109 out of your [bleep] mind? 1217 00:57:41,152 --> 00:57:43,503 well, i'd probably... 1218 00:57:44,721 --> 00:57:47,289 it looks like insulin's the way to go, 1219 00:57:47,332 --> 00:57:49,030 from what that doctor said. 1220 00:57:49,073 --> 00:57:51,336 like you can just tap dance into a drugstore 1221 00:57:51,380 --> 00:57:53,382 and get that stuff? 1222 00:57:53,425 --> 00:57:56,559 please! Oh, and that clorox bit. 1223 00:57:56,603 --> 00:57:58,300 there is a real winner. 1224 00:57:58,343 --> 00:58:01,085 those people were up all night with the runs, 1225 00:58:01,129 --> 00:58:04,262 and they refuse to jiggle the handle. 1226 00:58:04,306 --> 00:58:06,308 what are you talking about? 1227 00:58:06,351 --> 00:58:08,136 house guests. 1228 00:58:09,485 --> 00:58:13,271 i am talking about house guests from hell. 1229 00:58:14,621 --> 00:58:16,013 she's losing it. 1230 00:58:16,057 --> 00:58:18,755 listen to me. No, get that snack later. 1231 00:58:18,799 --> 00:58:20,104 you listen to me. 1232 00:58:20,148 --> 00:58:23,107 lock your doors. Don't answer the phone. 1233 00:58:23,151 --> 00:58:25,762 if you have to, leave the country, 1234 00:58:25,806 --> 00:58:27,764 but don't let them in. 1235 00:58:27,808 --> 00:58:30,550 don't let them fool you. They're very tricky. 1236 00:58:30,593 --> 00:58:33,204 they might look like your mother, your father, 1237 00:58:33,248 --> 00:58:34,771 or your best friend, 1238 00:58:34,815 --> 00:58:36,207 but they're animals. 1239 00:58:36,251 --> 00:58:38,296 they're cockroaches. 1240 00:58:38,340 --> 00:58:40,995 if we have a nuclear war, 1241 00:58:41,038 --> 00:58:44,259 the only living thing to survive 1242 00:58:44,302 --> 00:58:46,391 will be house guests! 1243 00:58:54,051 --> 00:58:55,836 we'll be right back... 1244 00:58:55,879 --> 00:58:57,881 with weather. 1245 00:59:17,901 --> 00:59:19,207 [loud rock music plays] 1246 00:59:19,250 --> 00:59:21,165 mark? 1247 00:59:21,209 --> 00:59:22,776 hello? 1248 00:59:26,954 --> 00:59:29,086 hey, buddy! 1249 00:59:29,130 --> 00:59:30,522 excuse me! 1250 00:59:30,566 --> 00:59:31,959 have you seen mark? 1251 00:59:32,002 --> 00:59:32,960 huh? 1252 00:59:33,003 --> 00:59:35,266 have you seen mark? 1253 00:59:35,310 --> 00:59:37,660 upstairs, I think. 1254 00:59:39,140 --> 00:59:42,230 are the, uh, bannisters doing a little remodeling? 1255 00:59:43,579 --> 00:59:46,277 i guess you might say that, yes. 1256 00:59:46,321 --> 00:59:48,715 i'm building bleachers for the tv set. 1257 00:59:50,673 --> 00:59:52,022 sure, sure you are. 1258 00:59:52,066 --> 00:59:53,720 ok. Sure. 1259 00:59:55,373 --> 00:59:57,027 another one. 1260 01:00:00,727 --> 01:00:01,771 thank god. 1261 01:00:01,815 --> 01:00:03,860 move, dork! 1262 01:00:07,124 --> 01:00:08,691 you repulsive little midget! 1263 01:00:08,735 --> 01:00:10,911 next time, flush! 1264 01:00:10,954 --> 01:00:14,001 excuse me. Have you seen mark bannister? 1265 01:00:14,044 --> 01:00:16,351 well, he was in the kitchen. 1266 01:00:16,394 --> 01:00:19,267 mark, my chains are squeaking! 1267 01:00:19,310 --> 01:00:22,052 it's time for my lube job! 1268 01:00:23,140 --> 01:00:26,535 i wouldn't go in there if I were you. 1269 01:00:26,578 --> 01:00:27,928 sure. 1270 01:00:27,971 --> 01:00:29,712 sure. 1271 01:00:29,756 --> 01:00:33,847 come on, scruffy. Let's go visit mr. Microwave. 1272 01:00:33,890 --> 01:00:34,935 [meow] 1273 01:00:34,978 --> 01:00:37,285 i'll make you a cat souffle. 1274 01:00:37,328 --> 01:00:39,374 come on. 1275 01:00:39,417 --> 01:00:42,072 excuse me, son? 1276 01:00:42,116 --> 01:00:44,596 have you, uh, seen mark bannister? 1277 01:00:44,640 --> 01:00:46,860 backyard. 1278 01:00:46,903 --> 01:00:49,819 shit, look at what you made me do. 1279 01:00:49,863 --> 01:00:51,778 i'm sorry. I'm sorry. 1280 01:01:00,917 --> 01:01:02,919 jessie? 1281 01:01:05,487 --> 01:01:07,794 god, you're not moving in, too, are you? 1282 01:01:07,837 --> 01:01:09,796 huh? No. 1283 01:01:09,839 --> 01:01:12,102 mark didn't come in to work, though, 1284 01:01:12,146 --> 01:01:14,975 and your phone's been off the hook. 1285 01:01:15,018 --> 01:01:17,717 mark, what the hell's going on? 1286 01:01:17,760 --> 01:01:20,458 well, I didn't sleep too good last night. 1287 01:01:20,502 --> 01:01:23,461 at 4:00 in the morning, the sprinklers went off. 1288 01:01:23,505 --> 01:01:25,028 i believe there's a short 1289 01:01:25,072 --> 01:01:27,335 in one of these extension cords. 1290 01:01:27,378 --> 01:01:28,989 no, I mean them. 1291 01:01:29,032 --> 01:01:31,774 why don't you get rid of them? 1292 01:01:31,818 --> 01:01:33,080 oh, no. 1293 01:01:33,123 --> 01:01:34,124 then I will. 1294 01:01:34,168 --> 01:01:35,647 no, we've tried that. 1295 01:01:35,691 --> 01:01:37,388 it just makes more. 1296 01:01:37,432 --> 01:01:40,087 we just hand over our paychecks, 1297 01:01:40,130 --> 01:01:41,784 stay out of their way... 1298 01:01:41,828 --> 01:01:44,787 it's for the best. 1299 01:01:44,831 --> 01:01:46,571 you got to listen to me. 1300 01:01:46,615 --> 01:01:49,661 if you don't work, you won't have a paycheck. 1301 01:01:49,705 --> 01:01:52,969 hey, big guy, come back to me, ok? 1302 01:01:53,013 --> 01:01:56,625 hydrolux-- Down 32 points. 1303 01:01:56,668 --> 01:01:58,801 grindle has gone completely ape. 1304 01:01:58,845 --> 01:02:00,629 we got to go.what should I do? 1305 01:02:00,672 --> 01:02:02,979 we got to go to work. 1306 01:02:03,023 --> 01:02:04,938 got to go to work. 1307 01:02:04,981 --> 01:02:05,939 bye, jessie. 1308 01:02:05,982 --> 01:02:08,332 don't be late for dinner, honey. 1309 01:02:08,376 --> 01:02:09,986 i won't. What are we having? 1310 01:02:11,640 --> 01:02:14,077 just squab again. 1311 01:02:14,121 --> 01:02:16,863 oh, god. What happened here? 1312 01:02:16,906 --> 01:02:19,996 well, uh, you know... 1313 01:02:20,040 --> 01:02:22,912 crackpots file indictments for lawsuits every day. 1314 01:02:22,956 --> 01:02:25,436 even the navy can make a mistake. 1315 01:02:25,480 --> 01:02:27,525 no, I didn't know that. 1316 01:02:27,569 --> 01:02:30,441 i guess I missed the wall street journal 1317 01:02:30,485 --> 01:02:32,008 all last week. 1318 01:02:32,052 --> 01:02:34,010 no, don't worry. I'm sorry. 1319 01:02:34,054 --> 01:02:37,013 your hydrolux stock will be sold immediately. 1320 01:02:37,057 --> 01:02:38,885 bannister! 1321 01:02:38,928 --> 01:02:40,016 yes? 1322 01:02:40,060 --> 01:02:41,191 explain this. 1323 01:02:41,235 --> 01:02:43,367 the grindle situation is under control. 1324 01:02:43,411 --> 01:02:45,369 that's not what i'm talking about. 1325 01:02:45,413 --> 01:02:46,806 what? 1326 01:02:46,849 --> 01:02:49,373 almost $6,000 worth of calls to south america-- 1327 01:02:49,417 --> 01:02:50,984 from your office. 1328 01:02:51,027 --> 01:02:52,246 obviously it's a mistake. 1329 01:02:52,289 --> 01:02:53,595 I've never made these. 1330 01:02:53,638 --> 01:02:55,162 oh? Who did? 1331 01:02:55,205 --> 01:02:57,686 how the hell do I-- 1332 01:02:57,729 --> 01:02:58,861 i will find out. 1333 01:02:58,905 --> 01:03:00,950 you do that. 1334 01:03:05,085 --> 01:03:07,914 jonathan, do you know anything about these phone-- 1335 01:03:07,957 --> 01:03:10,917 you got another one of these packages. 1336 01:03:10,960 --> 01:03:11,918 what packages? 1337 01:03:11,961 --> 01:03:13,920 these. Didn't you get them? 1338 01:03:13,963 --> 01:03:16,879 jonathan said he'd take care of it. See you. 1339 01:03:37,857 --> 01:03:39,032 aah! 1340 01:03:46,691 --> 01:03:47,779 oh! 1341 01:03:47,823 --> 01:03:50,217 bannister, what the hell are you doing? 1342 01:03:50,260 --> 01:03:51,479 sorry. 1343 01:04:07,495 --> 01:04:08,670 oh, mark? 1344 01:04:08,713 --> 01:04:12,065 can't you see i'm not in? 1345 01:04:22,989 --> 01:04:24,425 [trumpets] 1346 01:04:24,468 --> 01:04:26,775 aah! 1347 01:04:26,818 --> 01:04:28,081 tiny, no! 1348 01:04:28,124 --> 01:04:29,473 fred? 1349 01:04:29,517 --> 01:04:31,258 it's all right. Steady. Steady. 1350 01:04:31,301 --> 01:04:33,086 what the hell's going on? 1351 01:04:33,129 --> 01:04:34,609 i did it, pudge. 1352 01:04:34,652 --> 01:04:36,263 i did like you said. 1353 01:04:36,306 --> 01:04:38,178 fred, i'll be right back. 1354 01:04:38,221 --> 01:04:39,396 mark! 1355 01:04:39,440 --> 01:04:41,181 meet tiny bannister. 1356 01:04:41,224 --> 01:04:43,618 [trumpets] 1357 01:04:43,661 --> 01:04:45,446 this isn't a good time. 1358 01:04:45,489 --> 01:04:47,013 i followed my heart. 1359 01:04:47,056 --> 01:04:48,884 i found the real me. 1360 01:04:48,928 --> 01:04:50,103 you joined the circus? 1361 01:04:50,146 --> 01:04:51,626 no, I traveled. 1362 01:04:51,669 --> 01:04:53,889 i met interesting people. Well, shriners mostly. 1363 01:04:53,933 --> 01:04:57,066 let me get rid of this box, then we'll-- 1364 01:04:58,067 --> 01:04:59,286 oh, god! 1365 01:05:07,207 --> 01:05:08,730 howdy. 1366 01:05:08,773 --> 01:05:10,993 do you own this animal? 1367 01:05:11,037 --> 01:05:12,603 what? Oh, no. 1368 01:05:12,647 --> 01:05:13,909 she's mine. 1369 01:05:13,953 --> 01:05:15,563 do you have a permit? 1370 01:05:15,606 --> 01:05:17,347 no. We just got into town. 1371 01:05:17,391 --> 01:05:19,045 is this your residence? 1372 01:05:19,088 --> 01:05:19,959 no. 1373 01:05:20,002 --> 01:05:21,177 [trumpets] 1374 01:05:21,221 --> 01:05:22,962 uh, but my wife's upstairs. 1375 01:05:23,005 --> 01:05:24,789 they got her strung up. 1376 01:05:24,833 --> 01:05:26,443 what? 1377 01:05:26,487 --> 01:05:29,359 she's all right. She just tried to stab me. 1378 01:05:31,100 --> 01:05:32,841 excuse me? 1379 01:05:36,976 --> 01:05:38,499 jonathan! 1380 01:05:38,542 --> 01:05:39,500 jonathan! 1381 01:05:39,543 --> 01:05:42,068 mark, did you see the elephant? 1382 01:05:42,111 --> 01:05:43,504 he's got diarrhea. 1383 01:05:43,547 --> 01:05:45,027 you are diarrhea. 1384 01:05:45,071 --> 01:05:46,072 [trumpets] 1385 01:05:46,115 --> 01:05:47,638 not the flower bed! 1386 01:05:47,682 --> 01:05:50,032 how do we radio this in? 1387 01:05:50,076 --> 01:05:51,947 [meow] 1388 01:06:14,665 --> 01:06:17,233 i'll tell you how we radio it in. 1389 01:06:19,018 --> 01:06:20,149 rock house. 1390 01:06:22,891 --> 01:06:23,935 hey, uncle mark. 1391 01:06:23,979 --> 01:06:26,068 what is this? 1392 01:06:26,112 --> 01:06:28,331 it's got your name on it. 1393 01:06:28,375 --> 01:06:32,031 i guess it's your cocaine, man. 1394 01:06:32,074 --> 01:06:33,423 3, baker, 63. 1395 01:06:33,467 --> 01:06:36,035 possible rock house. Repeat, rock house. 1396 01:06:36,078 --> 01:06:38,298 elephant on premises. Send backup. 1397 01:06:38,341 --> 01:06:39,734 oh! 1398 01:07:05,455 --> 01:07:08,937 mark, what's 1051 in roman? 1399 01:07:08,980 --> 01:07:12,071 hey, hey, get off the bed! 1400 01:07:13,724 --> 01:07:15,074 this is the police. 1401 01:07:15,117 --> 01:07:17,424 come out with your hands up. 1402 01:07:20,035 --> 01:07:22,081 oh! 1403 01:07:31,177 --> 01:07:33,570 bastards wanna play hard ball, huh? 1404 01:07:33,614 --> 01:07:35,137 call in the battering ram. 1405 01:07:35,181 --> 01:07:36,443 [woof woof] 1406 01:07:38,836 --> 01:07:41,143 ouch! Yike! Yike! Yike! 1407 01:07:41,187 --> 01:07:43,711 what the hell is this? 1408 01:07:58,204 --> 01:07:59,161 hut! Hut! 1409 01:07:59,205 --> 01:08:00,597 hut! Hut! 1410 01:08:00,641 --> 01:08:03,383 claud, what the hell's going on out there? 1411 01:08:03,426 --> 01:08:04,993 men, lots of men. 1412 01:08:05,036 --> 01:08:06,342 what men? 1413 01:08:06,386 --> 01:08:08,779 the police. They're arresting your husband. 1414 01:08:08,823 --> 01:08:09,780 [trumpets] 1415 01:08:09,824 --> 01:08:11,086 that's a good girl. 1416 01:08:11,130 --> 01:08:12,261 now steady. 1417 01:08:12,305 --> 01:08:13,958 we're going back to the garage. 1418 01:08:14,002 --> 01:08:15,569 all right, now. 1419 01:08:15,612 --> 01:08:18,006 real slow to the squad car. 1420 01:08:18,049 --> 01:08:20,051 get your hands up. 1421 01:08:26,101 --> 01:08:27,885 hey! Hey, you! Buddy! 1422 01:08:27,929 --> 01:08:30,366 what the hell are you doing out there? 1423 01:08:30,410 --> 01:08:32,455 get off my new driveway! 1424 01:08:32,499 --> 01:08:35,066 those pebbles are worth $600! 1425 01:08:35,110 --> 01:08:37,068 $600! 1426 01:08:37,112 --> 01:08:39,070 600,000... 1427 01:08:39,114 --> 01:08:41,421 you old fart. 1428 01:08:52,214 --> 01:08:54,085 hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! 1429 01:08:54,129 --> 01:08:55,478 hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! 1430 01:08:55,522 --> 01:08:57,088 hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! 1431 01:08:57,132 --> 01:08:58,481 hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! 1432 01:08:58,525 --> 01:09:00,091 hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! 1433 01:09:00,135 --> 01:09:01,484 hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! 1434 01:09:01,528 --> 01:09:03,051 hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! 1435 01:09:04,444 --> 01:09:05,401 russell, please. 1436 01:09:05,445 --> 01:09:06,402 i can't. 1437 01:09:06,446 --> 01:09:08,361 please let me go on. 1438 01:09:08,404 --> 01:09:11,059 i swear to god i'm better now, 1439 01:09:11,102 --> 01:09:13,583 and I will never let my home life 1440 01:09:13,627 --> 01:09:15,933 affect my professional life again. Please? 1441 01:09:16,934 --> 01:09:19,154 this is myass, jessie. 1442 01:09:19,198 --> 01:09:20,721 get in there. 1443 01:09:20,764 --> 01:09:22,113 thank you, thank you. 1444 01:09:22,157 --> 01:09:23,332 10 seconds. 1445 01:09:26,509 --> 01:09:29,208 this is the channel 12 8:00 report. 1446 01:09:29,251 --> 01:09:33,821 camera one, tape on 5, 4, 1447 01:09:33,864 --> 01:09:35,997 3, 2... 1448 01:09:36,040 --> 01:09:37,390 good evening. 1449 01:09:37,433 --> 01:09:39,130 our top story tonight-- 1450 01:09:39,174 --> 01:09:40,784 a s.w.a.t. Team strike has been called in 1451 01:09:40,828 --> 01:09:42,221 on a santa monica home. 1452 01:09:42,264 --> 01:09:46,137 we now go live to field reporter brad bovee. 1453 01:09:46,181 --> 01:09:48,705 details are still a little sketchy, 1454 01:09:48,749 --> 01:09:51,317 but apparently police, suspecting cocaine on the premises, 1455 01:09:51,360 --> 01:09:53,319 have called in a full strike. 1456 01:09:53,362 --> 01:09:56,017 we've heard they have reason to believe 1457 01:09:56,060 --> 01:09:58,237 this is a rock house. 1458 01:09:59,934 --> 01:10:01,544 [burp] 1459 01:10:04,286 --> 01:10:06,636 [trumpets] 1460 01:10:06,680 --> 01:10:10,118 uh, wait a minute. Someone's coming out. 1461 01:10:11,511 --> 01:10:13,077 are you all right? 1462 01:10:13,121 --> 01:10:15,123 yeah. That was cool. 1463 01:10:15,166 --> 01:10:16,472 are we on tv? 1464 01:10:16,516 --> 01:10:17,908 brenda, call me. 1465 01:10:17,952 --> 01:10:18,909 [telephone rings] 1466 01:10:18,953 --> 01:10:20,433 are you the homeowner? 1467 01:10:20,476 --> 01:10:22,478 hell, no. You're saying he was dealing drugs? 1468 01:10:22,522 --> 01:10:23,958 we don't-- 1469 01:10:24,001 --> 01:10:26,308 i never did trust that guy. 1470 01:10:26,352 --> 01:10:28,702 it's them quiet, wimpy types 1471 01:10:28,745 --> 01:10:31,705 who get involved in this sort of thing. 1472 01:10:31,748 --> 01:10:33,228 flipping out, raping, killing. 1473 01:10:33,272 --> 01:10:37,101 karen, back to you until we make sense out of this. 1474 01:10:37,145 --> 01:10:38,755 this isn't your mama. 1475 01:10:38,799 --> 01:10:41,410 [trumpets] 1476 01:10:41,454 --> 01:10:42,498 thanks, brad. 1477 01:10:42,542 --> 01:10:45,371 we understand that the homeowners 1478 01:10:45,414 --> 01:10:47,111 are being sought for questioning 1479 01:10:47,155 --> 01:10:50,114 and that that baby elephant you just saw 1480 01:10:50,158 --> 01:10:52,116 is apparently unlicensed 1481 01:10:52,160 --> 01:10:54,380 and will be taken into police custody. 1482 01:10:54,423 --> 01:10:55,946 we'll keep you updated 1483 01:10:55,990 --> 01:10:58,949 as this bizarre story unfolds. 1484 01:11:05,260 --> 01:11:07,044 i don't believe it. 1485 01:11:07,088 --> 01:11:08,437 more poisonous gases. 1486 01:11:08,481 --> 01:11:10,004 investigators at this hour 1487 01:11:10,047 --> 01:11:12,006 are still trying to determine 1488 01:11:12,049 --> 01:11:14,008 the source of poisonous gases, 1489 01:11:14,051 --> 01:11:15,401 which rendered 12 employees 1490 01:11:15,444 --> 01:11:18,969 of the mid-wilshire district businesses unconscious. 1491 01:11:43,429 --> 01:11:44,952 jessie! 1492 01:11:46,083 --> 01:11:47,389 thank god I found you. 1493 01:11:47,433 --> 01:11:48,564 mark, what happened? 1494 01:11:48,608 --> 01:11:50,566 our nephew is a drug czar. 1495 01:11:50,610 --> 01:11:52,307 now I'm david janssen. 1496 01:11:52,351 --> 01:11:53,917 i had this whole-- 1497 01:11:53,961 --> 01:11:55,919 the dow jones plummeted again today. 1498 01:11:55,963 --> 01:11:58,531 among the hardest hit was the hydrolux corporation, 1499 01:11:58,574 --> 01:12:01,882 which, amid allegations of fraud by the u.s. Navy, 1500 01:12:01,925 --> 01:12:04,711 fell a record 85 points. 1501 01:12:04,754 --> 01:12:06,713 hydrolux president robert nellins 1502 01:12:06,756 --> 01:12:07,888 was unavailable for comment. 1503 01:12:07,931 --> 01:12:09,933 channel 12 news has learned, however, 1504 01:12:09,977 --> 01:12:12,980 he's on vacation in bora bora. 1505 01:12:13,023 --> 01:12:15,417 great. I'm an unemployed david janssen. 1506 01:12:15,461 --> 01:12:17,419 i forgot to sell grindle's stock. 1507 01:12:17,463 --> 01:12:20,030 shit, shit, shit! Come on, let's go. 1508 01:12:20,074 --> 01:12:23,425 i don't want to go. I'm staying in here. 1509 01:12:23,469 --> 01:12:25,296 let's live here. 1510 01:12:25,340 --> 01:12:26,341 what? 1511 01:12:26,385 --> 01:12:27,864 look, it's beautiful. 1512 01:12:27,908 --> 01:12:29,300 everything's clean and nice, 1513 01:12:29,344 --> 01:12:32,042 and, oh, mark, there's food in the re-- 1514 01:12:32,086 --> 01:12:34,349 look. Mock chicken pot pie. Mmm! 1515 01:12:34,393 --> 01:12:36,438 come on.no! 1516 01:12:36,482 --> 01:12:38,919 you're not going to take me away. 1517 01:12:38,962 --> 01:12:39,920 aah! 1518 01:12:39,963 --> 01:12:40,921 jessie! Jessie! 1519 01:12:40,964 --> 01:12:42,357 listen to me, mark! 1520 01:12:42,401 --> 01:12:44,925 we can live on a soap opera set. 1521 01:12:44,968 --> 01:12:46,492 they'll never know we're here. 1522 01:12:46,535 --> 01:12:49,103 we can be the phantoms of channel 12. 1523 01:12:49,146 --> 01:12:50,974 everything is going to be-- 1524 01:12:51,018 --> 01:12:54,282 don't say everything is going to be all right! 1525 01:12:54,325 --> 01:12:57,938 it's not going to be all right ever, ever, ever. 1526 01:12:57,981 --> 01:12:59,287 honey, honey, honey, honey. 1527 01:12:59,330 --> 01:13:01,942 all right, listen, listen, all right. 1528 01:13:01,985 --> 01:13:02,899 jessie, listen. 1529 01:13:02,943 --> 01:13:03,900 we'll, um... 1530 01:13:03,944 --> 01:13:05,511 we'll stay here tonight. 1531 01:13:05,554 --> 01:13:07,121 tomorrow we're leaving town, 1532 01:13:07,164 --> 01:13:08,905 changing our names. 1533 01:13:08,949 --> 01:13:10,951 we're going to start over. 1534 01:13:10,994 --> 01:13:12,387 what about our house? 1535 01:13:12,431 --> 01:13:15,434 i don't give a damn about the house. 1536 01:13:15,477 --> 01:13:18,262 i don't care about our jobs or our stuff. 1537 01:13:19,481 --> 01:13:22,441 the only thing that matters... 1538 01:13:22,484 --> 01:13:25,052 really matters... 1539 01:13:26,227 --> 01:13:28,316 is us. 1540 01:13:29,317 --> 01:13:31,058 oh, honey. 1541 01:13:58,999 --> 01:14:00,391 [sob] 1542 01:14:00,435 --> 01:14:03,482 yeah, I know what you mean. 1543 01:14:03,525 --> 01:14:06,049 let's grab what we can 1544 01:14:06,093 --> 01:14:07,964 and get out of here, ok? 1545 01:14:08,008 --> 01:14:08,965 ok. 1546 01:14:09,009 --> 01:14:10,184 [beep] 1547 01:14:10,227 --> 01:14:12,491 yes, this is Dr. Penix calling from trenton. 1548 01:14:12,534 --> 01:14:15,494 bernice, I've been trying to reach you for weeks. 1549 01:14:15,537 --> 01:14:17,321 I've got your test results. 1550 01:14:17,365 --> 01:14:20,020 i don't know how to tell you this, but... 1551 01:14:24,546 --> 01:14:26,766 you're not pregnant. 1552 01:14:26,809 --> 01:14:28,071 what? 1553 01:14:28,115 --> 01:14:29,551 dr. Penix just called, 1554 01:14:29,595 --> 01:14:34,077 and he said there is absolutely no way in the world 1555 01:14:34,121 --> 01:14:35,514 that you are pregnant. 1556 01:14:35,557 --> 01:14:37,994 you must have sent the wrong pee! 1557 01:14:39,518 --> 01:14:41,128 look at that, bernice. 1558 01:14:41,171 --> 01:14:43,043 your stomach's flat as a board. 1559 01:14:43,086 --> 01:14:45,393 i got a thin fetus! 1560 01:14:45,436 --> 01:14:49,963 bernice, get over it and get out. 1561 01:14:50,006 --> 01:14:52,269 you're just jealous 1562 01:14:52,313 --> 01:14:55,229 because no sperm in his right mind 1563 01:14:55,272 --> 01:14:57,797 would swim up your shriveled canal! 1564 01:14:57,840 --> 01:15:00,277 aah! 1565 01:15:00,321 --> 01:15:02,062 let go of me! 1566 01:15:02,105 --> 01:15:03,498 hey! Hey! 1567 01:15:03,542 --> 01:15:05,369 hey! Hey! 1568 01:15:05,413 --> 01:15:08,024 oh! 1569 01:15:08,068 --> 01:15:10,940 oh! 1570 01:15:24,084 --> 01:15:26,695 stay away from me, crazy lady. 1571 01:15:26,739 --> 01:15:27,696 say it. 1572 01:15:27,740 --> 01:15:28,697 what? 1573 01:15:28,741 --> 01:15:30,873 i want to hear you say it. 1574 01:15:30,917 --> 01:15:32,527 all right. I guess... 1575 01:15:32,571 --> 01:15:35,399 i'm not pregnant, but I could have sworn... 1576 01:15:35,443 --> 01:15:38,707 i felt my breasts swelling, constipation, nauseous. 1577 01:15:38,751 --> 01:15:39,708 say it! 1578 01:15:39,752 --> 01:15:40,927 somebody help! 1579 01:15:40,970 --> 01:15:43,494 aren't you going to do something? 1580 01:15:43,538 --> 01:15:44,626 nah. 1581 01:15:44,670 --> 01:15:45,888 no. 1582 01:15:45,932 --> 01:15:48,369 i'm going to count to three, bernice. One... 1583 01:15:48,412 --> 01:15:49,892 i want a second opinion. 1584 01:15:49,936 --> 01:15:51,241 two... 1585 01:15:52,242 --> 01:15:53,200 oh. 1586 01:15:53,243 --> 01:15:54,201 say it. 1587 01:15:54,244 --> 01:15:55,594 all right. We're leaving. 1588 01:15:55,637 --> 01:15:58,205 fred, start packing! 1589 01:16:04,646 --> 01:16:06,909 yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! 1590 01:16:06,953 --> 01:16:08,911 oh, honey. It's over. 1591 01:16:08,955 --> 01:16:11,131 it's finally over. 1592 01:16:13,133 --> 01:16:14,351 not quite. 1593 01:16:19,922 --> 01:16:22,098 let's clean house. 1594 01:16:22,142 --> 01:16:25,319 yeah. Kick ass. 1595 01:16:44,686 --> 01:16:47,733 company!company! 1596 01:16:52,476 --> 01:16:54,696 aah! 1597 01:16:56,480 --> 01:16:59,005 oh, sis! 1598 01:16:59,048 --> 01:17:03,183 jessa's got a surprise for you! 1599 01:17:03,226 --> 01:17:05,751 you want to play? 1600 01:17:05,794 --> 01:17:07,274 let's go, bannister! 1601 01:17:08,579 --> 01:17:11,191 now let's play cuisinart. 1602 01:17:16,979 --> 01:17:18,851 oh, claudia. 1603 01:17:18,894 --> 01:17:21,157 uh, I'm not decent! 1604 01:17:23,246 --> 01:17:24,987 tell me something I don't know. 1605 01:17:25,031 --> 01:17:27,163 calm down. I'll get you a valium. 1606 01:17:27,207 --> 01:17:29,818 you think you're real sharp, don't you? 1607 01:17:29,862 --> 01:17:31,777 people are, like, going totally mental. 1608 01:17:34,431 --> 01:17:37,043 let me ask you a question. 1609 01:17:37,086 --> 01:17:39,393 are you circumcised? 1610 01:17:39,436 --> 01:17:40,437 i'm warning you. 1611 01:17:42,135 --> 01:17:45,051 those are charles jordan! 1612 01:17:45,094 --> 01:17:49,359 i want you to get your gold-digging, lily-white ass 1613 01:17:49,403 --> 01:17:51,187 out of my house! 1614 01:17:51,231 --> 01:17:52,188 ooh. 1615 01:17:52,232 --> 01:17:56,540 no! 1616 01:17:59,500 --> 01:18:01,284 back off. Back off. 1617 01:18:01,328 --> 01:18:02,416 ok, man, don't kill me. 1618 01:18:02,459 --> 01:18:04,374 don't. Don't kill me. 1619 01:18:04,418 --> 01:18:07,247 you wimp. 1620 01:18:07,290 --> 01:18:09,249 i always figured you'd come up short in a clinch. 1621 01:18:09,292 --> 01:18:11,251 come on! 1622 01:18:17,910 --> 01:18:19,476 stay away from me! 1623 01:18:19,520 --> 01:18:22,741 stay away from me! 1624 01:18:33,969 --> 01:18:35,797 oof!what's this? 1625 01:18:35,841 --> 01:18:37,581 it's jonathan. 1626 01:18:37,625 --> 01:18:39,670 get the hell out of my house. 1627 01:18:39,714 --> 01:18:41,498 back off! 1628 01:18:41,542 --> 01:18:44,023 try that again, and I'll cut you. I swear. 1629 01:18:49,593 --> 01:18:52,074 give me your keys! 1630 01:18:52,118 --> 01:18:53,902 give me your car keys now! 1631 01:18:53,946 --> 01:18:54,990 shut up! 1632 01:18:55,034 --> 01:18:57,079 wouldn't you rather take the lotus? 1633 01:18:57,123 --> 01:18:58,298 yeah. 1634 01:18:59,995 --> 01:19:01,954 that's an excellent idea. Take them. 1635 01:19:01,997 --> 01:19:03,172 oops. I'm sorry about that. 1636 01:19:03,216 --> 01:19:05,087 you know what? 1637 01:19:05,131 --> 01:19:07,046 if we thought about this, 1638 01:19:07,089 --> 01:19:08,569 maybe we could work it out. 1639 01:19:08,612 --> 01:19:09,788 bullshit! 1640 01:19:09,831 --> 01:19:11,659 you know, jonathan, we're all family. 1641 01:19:11,702 --> 01:19:13,313 we could sit down, talk-- 1642 01:19:13,356 --> 01:19:14,705 no way, man! 1643 01:19:14,749 --> 01:19:16,707 let's call the prayer line. 1644 01:19:16,751 --> 01:19:18,579 uncle mark, you are a yuppie dickhead! 1645 01:19:18,622 --> 01:19:19,885 well--get back. 1646 01:19:19,928 --> 01:19:23,105 one day I'll buy and sell people like you. 1647 01:19:23,149 --> 01:19:26,108 i'm going to make some noise. 1648 01:19:26,152 --> 01:19:28,502 we know you are. 1649 01:19:31,070 --> 01:19:32,636 jonathan. 1650 01:19:32,680 --> 01:19:33,942 move. 1651 01:19:33,986 --> 01:19:35,639 hey, that's my fireworks! 1652 01:19:35,683 --> 01:19:39,426 get away from that car! That's a loaner! 1653 01:19:49,392 --> 01:19:51,917 stupid things didn't work. 1654 01:19:51,960 --> 01:19:53,135 [explosion] 1655 01:19:57,139 --> 01:19:59,141 they always work. 1656 01:20:00,142 --> 01:20:03,058 i am the king of this castle! 1657 01:20:03,102 --> 01:20:05,800 and I am his queen! 1658 01:20:05,844 --> 01:20:08,368 we will burn it to the ground 1659 01:20:08,411 --> 01:20:12,111 before we let any of you back in! 1660 01:20:12,154 --> 01:20:15,723 you parasites! 1661 01:20:30,216 --> 01:20:32,000 are you the homeowners here? 1662 01:20:32,044 --> 01:20:33,784 that's right. What about it? 1663 01:20:33,828 --> 01:20:35,786 on behalf of the p.d., 1664 01:20:35,830 --> 01:20:37,701 I've been authorized to issue an apology 1665 01:20:37,745 --> 01:20:39,007 for what happened last night. 1666 01:20:39,051 --> 01:20:40,791 we're prepared to pay for damages. 1667 01:20:40,835 --> 01:20:41,923 all the damages? 1668 01:20:41,967 --> 01:20:43,272 yes, ma'am. 1669 01:20:43,316 --> 01:20:45,187 wait. What about the criminal investigation? 1670 01:20:45,231 --> 01:20:47,886 there was some talk about pursuing that. 1671 01:20:47,929 --> 01:20:50,018 we found our hard evidence was missing. 1672 01:20:50,062 --> 01:20:52,020 what evidence? 1673 01:20:52,064 --> 01:20:54,414 the cat that dropped dead on your lawn... 1674 01:20:54,457 --> 01:20:56,155 disappeared from the evidence room. 1675 01:20:56,198 --> 01:20:58,940 there'll be hell to pay over that one. 1676 01:21:01,029 --> 01:21:01,987 yo! 1677 01:21:02,030 --> 01:21:03,597 wa-wa-woo-woo! 1678 01:21:03,640 --> 01:21:07,079 yay! 1679 01:21:07,122 --> 01:21:09,951 iya iya iya iya iya! 1680 01:21:09,995 --> 01:21:11,387 woo! 1681 01:21:18,133 --> 01:21:20,919 I've been looking all over for you! 1682 01:21:20,962 --> 01:21:23,878 oh, yeah, grindle? Let me tell you something. 1683 01:21:23,922 --> 01:21:26,359 I've had it with loud-mouth bullies like you. 1684 01:21:26,402 --> 01:21:28,013 the navy dropped the fraud charges. 1685 01:21:28,056 --> 01:21:29,666 go ahead and fire me. 1686 01:21:29,710 --> 01:21:32,582 hydrolux went up 157 points. 1687 01:21:32,626 --> 01:21:33,975 i made a bundle because of you. 1688 01:21:34,019 --> 01:21:35,977 you're the worst kind of arrogant-- 1689 01:21:36,021 --> 01:21:37,544 i want you to work for me. 1690 01:21:37,587 --> 01:21:38,545 putz! 1691 01:21:38,588 --> 01:21:39,763 i'll double your salary. 1692 01:21:39,807 --> 01:21:40,764 screw you. 1693 01:21:40,808 --> 01:21:42,070 all right. Triple. 1694 01:21:42,114 --> 01:21:43,767 screw you blue! 1695 01:21:43,811 --> 01:21:45,073 senior vice-president 1696 01:21:45,117 --> 01:21:46,988 at four times your present salary. 1697 01:21:47,032 --> 01:21:49,773 that's my final offer-- If that's ok. 1698 01:21:49,817 --> 01:21:51,993 let me tell you something, asshole-- 1699 01:21:52,037 --> 01:21:53,386 honey, shut up. 1700 01:21:55,040 --> 01:21:57,085 we'll let you know. 1701 01:21:57,129 --> 01:21:58,521 great! 1702 01:21:58,565 --> 01:22:01,089 your kind of hardball's what I've been looking for. 1703 01:22:01,133 --> 01:22:03,352 we're going to make millions. 1704 01:22:06,051 --> 01:22:08,314 i don't believe we've met. 1705 01:22:08,357 --> 01:22:09,968 uh, bob grindle, ma'am. 1706 01:22:10,969 --> 01:22:13,058 and you are, uh... 1707 01:22:13,101 --> 01:22:15,886 your wildest dreams come true, darling. 1708 01:22:18,063 --> 01:22:20,979 lotus is definitely the car of the future. 1709 01:22:21,022 --> 01:22:22,632 when my insurance kicks in, 1710 01:22:22,676 --> 01:22:24,983 i'll be back on easy street. 1711 01:22:25,026 --> 01:22:27,028 in the meantime, I was wondering 1712 01:22:27,072 --> 01:22:30,031 if you had room for me and my wonderful kids. 1713 01:22:30,075 --> 01:22:31,076 maybe. 1714 01:22:31,119 --> 01:22:33,469 i don't want to live with some cop. 1715 01:22:33,513 --> 01:22:36,603 you want brussels sprouts three meals a day, punk? 1716 01:22:42,522 --> 01:22:44,089 yo, baby. Chop chop! 1717 01:22:44,132 --> 01:22:46,047 don't "yo, baby" me. 1718 01:22:46,091 --> 01:22:48,484 you said you were going to change. 1719 01:22:48,528 --> 01:22:51,052 i thought you might change and maybe shave. 1720 01:22:51,096 --> 01:22:52,619 you look like fu manchu. 1721 01:22:52,662 --> 01:22:55,274 bernice, remember what we practiced? 1722 01:22:57,102 --> 01:22:59,930 no yapping.that's right. 1723 01:22:59,974 --> 01:23:03,456 fine. You can do the talking from now on 1724 01:23:03,499 --> 01:23:05,588 'cause my jaws are tired... 1725 01:23:08,330 --> 01:23:10,811 [meow] 1726 01:23:10,854 --> 01:23:11,812 [meow] 1727 01:23:11,855 --> 01:23:12,813 scruffy doodle! 1728 01:23:12,856 --> 01:23:14,815 oh, there is a god. 1729 01:23:14,858 --> 01:23:17,078 come to me, boo-boo. 1730 01:23:17,122 --> 01:23:18,601 [meow] 1731 01:23:20,125 --> 01:23:21,474 bernice... 1732 01:23:21,517 --> 01:23:25,086 i don't think he wants to go with you. 1733 01:23:25,130 --> 01:23:26,827 according to my calculations, 1734 01:23:26,870 --> 01:23:29,003 he has... Five lives left. 1735 01:23:29,047 --> 01:23:31,484 he's welcome to spend the rest with us. 1736 01:23:31,527 --> 01:23:33,051 he's earned it. 1737 01:23:33,094 --> 01:23:35,096 don't be silly. Come to mama. 1738 01:23:35,140 --> 01:23:36,445 aah! 1739 01:23:37,446 --> 01:23:39,187 traitor. 1740 01:23:40,232 --> 01:23:43,191 we got to stay in touch, stretch. 1741 01:23:43,235 --> 01:23:44,453 ooh! 1742 01:23:44,497 --> 01:23:47,065 i'll call you once a month. 1743 01:23:47,108 --> 01:23:49,632 is collect ok until I get a job? 1744 01:23:50,851 --> 01:23:54,115 i'll write. If you ever get to new jersey-- 1745 01:23:54,159 --> 01:23:56,030 we'll stay at the holiday inn. 1746 01:24:01,601 --> 01:24:02,602 [horn honks] 1747 01:24:04,604 --> 01:24:05,953 [trumpets] 1748 01:24:27,496 --> 01:24:30,412 i cannot believe this place is ours again. 1749 01:24:51,259 --> 01:24:53,870 [toilet handle dripping] 1750 01:24:58,223 --> 01:25:00,050 i'll be back. 1751 01:25:30,124 --> 01:25:31,865 ♪ when you sing 1752 01:25:34,128 --> 01:25:37,697 ♪ of the joy only love can bring ♪ 1753 01:25:41,048 --> 01:25:42,876 ♪ heaven knows 1754 01:25:44,921 --> 01:25:48,229 ♪ it's in my heart and my soul ♪ 1755 01:25:52,277 --> 01:25:56,019 ♪ we're caught in a world full of tears ♪ 1756 01:25:57,456 --> 01:26:02,983 ♪ of so many sad times and fears ♪ 1757 01:26:03,026 --> 01:26:05,377 ♪ so while there's a chance ♪ 1758 01:26:05,420 --> 01:26:07,379 ♪ and you're near 1759 01:26:07,422 --> 01:26:10,033 ♪ well, let's dance 1760 01:26:12,340 --> 01:26:14,081 ♪ yeah, yeah 1761 01:26:14,124 --> 01:26:15,430 ♪ let's dance 1762 01:26:24,961 --> 01:26:26,485 ♪ let's dance 1763 01:26:30,097 --> 01:26:31,838 ♪ let's dance 1764 01:26:35,668 --> 01:26:37,409 ♪ let's dance ♪ 1765 01:26:40,107 --> 01:26:43,458 ♪ it's a rat race, and the rats will win ♪ 1766 01:26:43,502 --> 01:26:47,723 ♪ if we don't find time for us again ♪ 1767 01:26:47,767 --> 01:26:53,512 ♪ what we need is a quiet place of our own ♪ 1768 01:26:53,555 --> 01:26:55,253 ♪ to keep us safe 1769 01:26:55,296 --> 01:26:59,735 ♪ what we thought couldn't happen here ♪ 1770 01:26:59,779 --> 01:27:03,304 ♪ moved right in and made it clear ♪ 1771 01:27:03,348 --> 01:27:07,134 ♪ we'll never be alone 1772 01:27:07,177 --> 01:27:14,054 ♪ we have watched our happy home become a madhouse ♪ 1773 01:27:14,097 --> 01:27:18,058 ♪ madhouse 1774 01:27:18,101 --> 01:27:21,757 ♪ madhouse 1775 01:27:21,801 --> 01:27:25,152 ♪ the lights are on but nobody's home ♪ 1776 01:27:33,769 --> 01:27:36,946 ♪ just a dream we held on to ♪ 1777 01:27:36,990 --> 01:27:40,994 ♪ a place alone for me and you ♪ 1778 01:27:41,037 --> 01:27:44,650 ♪ now the dream comes crashing down ♪ 1779 01:27:44,693 --> 01:27:47,914 ♪ I feel that we've been losing ground ♪ 1780 01:27:47,957 --> 01:27:52,048 ♪ moments fade away 1781 01:27:52,092 --> 01:27:55,748 ♪ insanity is here to stay 1782 01:27:55,791 --> 01:27:59,360 ♪ we got more than we bargained for ♪ 1783 01:27:59,404 --> 01:28:03,103 ♪ it's standing here outside the door ♪ 1784 01:28:03,146 --> 01:28:06,715 ♪ of our madhouse 1785 01:28:06,759 --> 01:28:09,936 ♪ madhouse 1786 01:28:09,979 --> 01:28:14,114 ♪ madhouse 1787 01:28:14,157 --> 01:28:17,987 ♪ the lights are on but nobody's home ♪ 1788 01:28:59,420 --> 01:29:02,554 ♪ madhouse 1789 01:29:02,597 --> 01:29:06,471 ♪ madhouse 1790 01:29:06,514 --> 01:29:10,431 ♪ madhouse 1791 01:29:10,475 --> 01:29:14,740 ♪ the lights are on but nobody's home ♪ 1792 01:29:14,783 --> 01:29:18,091 ♪ madhouse 1793 01:29:18,134 --> 01:29:21,660 ♪ madhouse 1794 01:29:21,703 --> 01:29:25,751 ♪ madhouse 1795 01:29:25,794 --> 01:29:29,276 ♪ the lights are on but nobody's home ♪ 1796 01:29:29,319 --> 01:29:33,411 ♪ madhouse 1797 01:29:33,454 --> 01:29:36,631 ♪ madhouse 1798 01:29:36,675 --> 01:29:40,592 ♪ madhouse 1799 01:29:40,635 --> 01:29:44,204 ♪ the lights are on but nobody's home ♪ 1800 01:29:44,247 --> 01:29:47,468 ♪ madhouse 1801 01:29:47,512 --> 01:29:51,254 ♪ madhouse 1802 01:29:51,298 --> 01:29:55,302 ♪ madhouse 1803 01:29:55,345 --> 01:29:59,132 ♪ the lights are on but nobody's home ♪ 108369

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.