All language subtitles for Forgive.Me.S01E01.Father.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-Kitsune_track3_[eng]

Hey Tommy.

Nightmares?

Visitations, maybe.

Who was it this time?

I think Sebastian.

I like him.

Morning.

Morning.

There's eggs.

Yeah.

He seemed nice.

He did speak Italian
in the dream, but.

The terror you inspire
and the pride of your heart

have deceived you.

You who live in the
clefts of the rock,

who hold the height of the hill.

Although you make your nest

as high as the eagles.

From there, I will
bring you down.

So sayeth the Lord.

We talk about the end of times.

We talk about global warming,

the fiscal cliff,

all kinds of scary
things to keep us afraid.

We do not need to be afraid.

We need to trust in the Lord,

and we need to know
that in our hearts,

we strive to find a place
for us in his good grace.

We need to find a place
of peace in ourselves,

and not be distracted by
the ways of the world.

Forgive me Father,
for I have sinned.

It's been 51 years since
my last confession.

51?

I'm rounding up.

Last thing I wanna do is
stretch the truth at this point.

What's kept you?

Nothing in particular.

I made a deal with God.

Okay.

I'm gonna bite.

What was the nature of the deal?

That I wouldn't trouble Him.

Unburdening my soul every week,

year in year out
like a busybody.

That I would save it up
and when it mattered,

I would come in and get
the job done, efficiently.

Hm.

God agreed to this?

I had him over a
barrel at the time.

You musta caught
him on a weekday.

I didn't know you
were allowed to joke.

Well, a lot's
changed in 51 years.

Oh yes.

Heard about meat on Friday.

Was,

was there a falling out?

With God?

Mm hm.

No.

Not with God.

I wanted some
self-determination.

Look,

I don't think it
matters why I stopped

coming to weekly penance,

the fact is that I did
and that I'm here now.

Seeking absolution.

Oh, let's get started.

Well, I um ...

I certainly planted
two different crops,

side by side.

I couldn't avoid that,
it was a small plot.

That is understandable.

I touched the
skin of a dead pig

on a fair number of occasions.

But I had two boys,
they loved football.

You know, you do
seem to be focused

on the more obscure,
Biblical sins.

I'm just getting
started, Father.

They do get juicier.

I had sex while on my period,

and with a condom.

I was on the pill for
12 years, on and off.

But those things, you know,

I don't honestly feel penitent.

I don't honestly feel
penitent about sex.

The fact is I had

a lot of it,

with whomever I wanted,

and sometimes just
for something to do.

It was the '70s.

I never cheated on--

Well, I did cheat
on somebody once.

For that, I am sorry,

because it hurt him.

Well, not terribly,
but it did hurt him,

and I would like to
be absolved for that.

Were you married?

Yes, but that's not
whom I cheated on.

Which I suppose brings
me to the divorce.

Had to be done, but ...

Well, it's a sin
and I confess it.

If you're not

genuinely sorry,

my blessing is not
going to absolve you.

But you will absolve me.

You will bless me.

I will offer you the blessing.

I'll pray for you but ...

Hm.

I gave my kids' dog to
a bide awhile shelter,

and told them it went to a farm.

I lied all the time.

Oh, how I lied.

Almost always to protect
other people's feelings.

You look good.

That's a nice haircut.

That type of thing.

Oh, I really enjoyed your book.

Personally, I don't
know many great authors,

but I do know a lot of
the self-published type,

and what do you say?

You lie.

It's the only reasonable thing.

You still don't sound sorry.

Well, I am for that.

Wish I'd had the nerve

to tell them they
were shitty writers.

Forgive me.

That they were
wasting their time,

and other people's,

and the trees.

That's not the same thing
as being sorry to God.

Right, I think that
your grace is what

we should be talking about here.

Your relationship with God.

I have a lot of
ground to cover, Father.

Maybe you need to forgive God,

before you're ready
to be forgiven.

That's blasphemy.

No, I don't think so.

You made a deal to
abandon God for 50 years,

but God, he would
never make that deal.

The only thing I'm saying
is that I don't think

you're going to feel any
healing benefit of absolution

while you remain angry.

Who says I'm angry?

You're distant from God,

and you're not here
to become any closer.

I came here to confess
and you're not letting me.

You were hurt,

and then you made your deal,

so who hurt you?

God?

God hurts everyone.

I was never so naive as
to think I'd be different.

Then, who?

I had an abortion.

Are you sorry for that?

No.

It's a serious mortal sin.

What's your name?

Bookie, I'm called.

I was a librarian
for some years.

Much of it on
Sundays, that's a sin.

Bookie.

An abortion is a mortal sin.

For you to

confess it

and not feel penitent,

I feel like you are
trying to cheat.

You think this is
easy for me, Father?

They're my sins.

But isn't it the easy way?

To come in, confess,

once in a lifetime?

You save everything up,

you spend a few minutes,

you get absolution,

you wouldn't consider
that to be cheating?

Technically, no.

What's happened to you?

What?

To make you come
in and confess now.

You said that you were
saving it up until it was,

until it was necessary.

Mattered.

Until it mattered, I said.

It always mattered.

What changed?

I have a daughter
I don't speak to.

That's a sin.

Why don't you speak to her?

It's a long story.

I need to know.

You're not my
therapist, Father.

I don't need you to
deconstruct my relationship

with my daughter, or to fix it.

Not talking to your
daughter is only a sin

if it's done with malice.

There may very well be
mitigating circumstances.

Maybe she hurt you.

Maybe she takes
advantage of you,

or she threatens you.

She's willful and cruel.

She's always raging
on about something.

She used to be an addict,

I know this.

I was enabling her with money.

That's what Al anon said,

that I had to stop
enabling her with money.

This was the only
way I could do it.

I can't say no when I see her.

When I see her face.

So, I don't see her.

Well see, that's a
mitigating circumstance.

So, not a sin?

I'm not sure that it is.

Well I'd rather err on the
side of a few extra Hail Marys.

Fair enough.

This is so different
than when I was a girl.

The priests were
so intimidating.

I can be intimidating.

Oh, I'm sure.

Well, I'm working on it.

Why would you do this?

You seem an unlikely priest.

You don't seem dogmatic or sure.

You're not even certain.

I seem to know more about
what's a sin than you do.

You have certainly
committed more of them.

Well, I've had
a lot more time.

I've done all the
seven deadly sins.

You're gonna need to be
more specific than that.

All right.

The divorce, I ...

I was greedy.

I wanted the apartment
and the money.

I was wrathful toward my mother.

Avoiding her and then belittling
her when I did see her.

I was envious of my
sister's marriage.

So much so that I
caused it problems.

Gluttony well,

not so bad,

but I'm always next to the
cheese plate in a party photo.

Well, maybe the way that
you approached your divorce

was wrath,

and those cheese plate
photos are vanity.

Everybody looks better
next to a plate of cheese.

You remind me of my son.

Such an appreciation
for the absurd.

I can see where he gets it.

Do you believe in all this?

Heaven, Hell, Purgatory,

Sacraments?

I believe in the soul.

I do,

I believe in God's kingdom, yes.

It was a third
trimester abortion.

Either the baby
was going to die,

or we both were.

I named him Gus.

I'm sorry.

You're sorry?

It's a terrible loss.

Terrible sin, is what
you're supposed to say.

That's what they
said at the time.

Is this the reason
that you left the Church?

The Church,

my marriage,

my family, most of them.

The Church said it would
be better for me to die,

than to kill my child.

In so many words?

In a lot of words.

That's what they meant.

As if any living creature
would just let itself die,

just let itself die when
the cure for it's illness

was readily apparent,

and on an outpatient basis.

That's what Christ did.

Look I'm not saying,

that it's what you
should've done,

but Christ, he allowed
himself to die.

That's a basic
tenet of the faith.

If, if there were complicated
discussions regarding the

ethics of your situation--

Christ did not
let himself die,

he was killed by other people.

So that others might have God.

Well my ruptured fallopian
tube was not going to give

anybody God.

You felt judged.

I was judged.

There was nothing
else you could do.

I never felt so worthless.

I thought, this is what
I'm worth to my Church,

to my priest.

Do nothing.

Leave it to God.

Die.

Worthless.

It was a different time.

People understood less.

The science was much--

Well, you're very
nice but, this was--

Did they excommunicate you?

No.

Well that would've
been the standard.

Anybody choosing an abortion,

they would have
been excommunicated,

and only absolved by the Bishop.

I didn't know that.

Maybe,

he was more sympathetic
than you thought.

Maybe he was.

I excommunicated myself.

You are always welcome here.

At the rate we're going,

I'm going to have to
come back 10 times,

just to get through all my sins.

If you're lucky.

I have nothing better to do.

I feel better, you know?

Talking to you.

Well, we've gotten this far,

shall we do it?

Absolve me.

Maybe since you've saved
it all up for so long,

why don't we save
the absolution,

until you tell me everything?

I'm on a schedule
here, Father.

I want to make
sure I get credit.

What schedule?

It's not precise.

They must've
given you an idea.

A prognosis?

You told me that you
were gonna save it all up

until it mattered.

I really can't think of
anything that that would mean,

except that you're,

you're gonna die.

You want absolution
before it happens.

Not long.

Weeks,

months.

What is it?

The thing that's killing
me is not a sin this time.

There is no sin I can
commit to save myself,

or I would, believe me.

God, Father of Mercies.

Through the death and the
resurrection of your son,

Jesus Christ, you
have reconciled
yourself to the world.

You have sent the
Holy Spirit among us

for the forgiveness of sins.

Through the ministry
of the Church,

may the Lord grant
you pardon and peace,

and I absolve you of your sins.

In the name of the Father,

and of the Son,

and of the Holy Spirit,

Amen.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

That's it?

No penance?

Your penance?

Just to come back
and finish and tell.

We just touched the tip of
the proverbial sin iceberg

with you.

You got some good highlights.

Hm.

I did.

Look, I feel that I could

probably be doing a little
bit more here to help you.

Do you want help?

We've got lots of volunteers.

They can come and
cook and clean.

They'd talk to your family--

Oh no no.

I don't want them to
know I even came here.

Is your relationship
with Christ an illicit one?

More or less.

I look forward to
seeing you again.

If I can.

You can.

Good afternoon, Father.

God be with you.

You remember the response?

I do.

Were you waiting
to make a confession?

You don't
recognize me, do you?

Your voice is the same.

You look good.

Just so we're clear though,

I am taken now.

Married to Christ.

That's just nuns.

Visiting with your cousin?

Titty bella ...

Titabelle.

It's Titabelle.

I didn't know if she
still lived around here,

I haven't seen her.

Yeah well, none of my family
ever came back to Church,

after what I did.

They should.

They don't like you.

Actually, I came to see you,

not Titabelle.

I need to show you something.

I have a daughter.

Hm.

She's beautiful.

She looks like you.

Did you lie to me?

I knew you didn't love me,

but at least I loved you
enough to not ruin your life.

You call this not
ruining my life?

When I was new here,

just arrived,

I was very different.

Nobody saw me as the girl that
I felt like on the inside,

but you came around.

You were handsome
and kind and caring.

Of course I'd fall
in love with you.

I was lonely.

You lied to me.

Yes.

I prayed.

I prayed every single day,

and every night for that life,

that soul that you terminated.

11 years.

I've been doing penance
for a mistake for 11 years.

It was my sin.

I didn't even commit that sin.

My only sin was lying to you.

No, your only
sin was not lying.

You deprived your
child of a father.

Took away my chance
at being happy.

I gave you your
chance to be happy.

You know, I thought
about trapping you.

Marrying you.

You were just the
sort of boy to do it,

just to be nice.

So?

Why didn't you?

Because I deserve
more than nice.

I wanted to try,

but you got accepted
into the seminary,

and you seemed pretty convinced.

I was gonna have the abortion,

but when,

when I got to my uncle's place,

I knew I wouldn't do it.

You should've told me.

No.

You were pretty content
to never see me again.

Honestly, if she weren't asking
about you every damn day,

I'd be content to never
see you again either.

But here we are.

What were you hoping for?

What were you hoping that
I was gonna be able to do?

She lacks a father.

I thought maybe you
could be her priest.

At least then she could
still call you Father.

Next
time on Forgive Me.

Coming in here, I thought
I would feel condemned.

This is where you
come to get uncondemned.

You shouldn't even
be having sex.

How do you think I got
to be your grandmother?

You got some girl knocked up,

that you didn't even know
well enough to know that

she was knocked up.