Original subtitles

There's food around here. Oh, there is food around here, man. Where, dude?

Where's their food?

There's Juan Don Juan Taco Sam right behind me. Hey, who's that girl, dude?

Who's that blonde, dude?

She looks so nice. Like, wholesome.

That's not me, dude. I need a girlfriend, man. I'm sick of this

shit.

That chick, she's probably only been with like one or two guys.

Fuck, dude. I think she's gonna come out pretty soon, dude.

Just get some food, man. Wait, wait. Hold on, dude. I want to talk to this

Now, wait. Should I tell her I need a girlfriend or should I just pull that

bikini shit on her?

Neither. Dude, come on. That's all you need, a taco.

A taco?

Ooh, a pink taco, dude.

Wait, how about this? How about the bikini? Then we'll kind of pull the taco

stuff in the audition.

But, dude, see, I want a nice girl, though. She probably won't fuck me, but

that's a good way to see if she's really wholesome.

Yeah.

Okay. Oh, shit, dude, here she comes. All right, don't fuck this up, dude.

are we doing, bikini modeling or what?

I don't know, flip a coin. Dude, fuck, tell me.

Uh, do the bikini modeling. What do we do?

People driving around, dude, they're going to see us picking her up.

She looks so nice today.

Wait,

I think she saw me looking at her. Yeah, well, you're not too subtle about

everything. Well, I don't know. I'm not going to say anything.

She's cute. She looks so nice.

What do I say? Tell me, quick.

I don't know.

Tyler, help me, dude. Do my boy.

I don't want to fucking talk.

Hey, bro.

What's going on?

What are you figuring out? I'm going to say it.

Bianca. Bianca, nice to meet you. This is my boy, Tyler.

Hello. You just seem like a really nice chick. You don't seem like you're from L

.A. Where are you from?

I'm from Oklahoma.

Oklahoma? What are you doing shopping out here in L .A.? Don't you know prices

are like three times as high? I know.

Visiting friends.

Really? Yeah.

What did you buy? Buy a $5 million?

No, I got a new bikini.

My friend wanted to go swimming, so I had to go buy a new bikini. Tyler is a

god. Are you serious?

Dude, okay, no joke. We literally, we shoot for a bikini modeling.

Oh, really? Yeah, totally.

Look at her, Tyler. I think she's got a banging body. She should do some bikini

modeling. Yeah, they sent us out here. Yeah, have you ever thought about doing

bikini modeling? They sent you out here to pick up girls? Well, no. We were just

walking around looking for some food. He's actually a film student.

Oh, okay. Yeah, probably just doing some work for the university and freaking

hired him to be my camera guy for the bikini stuff.

Have you thought about it? You make good money in your current job?

Yeah, I do pretty good. You make about $800 an hour?

Well, no, not that good.

Bikini modeling pays really well. I mean, Tyler, no joke, dude.

Tyler's sister does bikini modeling, dude. She's got a huge house on the

She's always playing around.

What would I have to do? Just audition.

All you've got to do is check out in your bikini, make sure you don't have

tattoos or burnishes or stretch marks. Just, like, walk around?

We take a couple pictures, test shots, you know, make sure everything's all

right. This could be the opportunity of a lifetime.

Opportunity only knocks once.

Okay, just coming from Oklahoma doesn't mean I'm dumb.

Are you guys joking with me? Oh, no, I'm sure.

Tyler. Look at that face, man. That looks like the face of a joker.

I would never joke.

We just want to talk to you. We just want to see what you would look like in

bikini. We don't think that my clients would love you. We're sick of the L .A.

trashy vibe. They want the wholesome Oklahoma vibe.

If they're sick of the L .A. trashy vibe, what are you doing standing

a store looking for L .A. girls?

We're looking for fucking food, dude. We want some tacos.

Okay. And you just so happen had your camera and decided to follow me? No,

fucking Tyler told me there's some pink tacos standing around here. And I'm

like, whatever, dude. I couldn't find it.

Tyler, I'm hungry. The pink taco.

We'll buy you dinner. We'll take you to the pink taco.

Oh, OK.

Just as a consolation. Normally, we don't even pay for the audition. We just

kind of check you out. And it's sort of competitive. But I think you have a

little chance.

But if you don't want to do it with me.

So just, I'll watch you as you go. But I want some new pictures. Yeah, walk

around with a couple of test shots. There's no release for them right now.

to go.

Yes, I can do it. I don't have nothing else. Yeah. Well, let's do it now, dude,

because I'm fucking hungry. Let's get this crank down and eat with some food.

the back end. You good? Let's do it.

All right. So this is the studio where we auditioned. I have to take a little

seat right here.

So you're sure bikini modeling is something you want to do, right?

Yeah, I guess we'll try it out. Yeah.

Because Tyler, I think she's got what it takes, dude. Yeah.

She's got bikini modeling hair.

She's got the long blonde hair. You got the whole California thing going.

She seems kind of suspect.

I don't think she trusts us. Well, I don't know.

You just kind of met us. There's two guys walking up on the street. That's

of weird. No, wait. How old are you?

I'm 21.

Okay, good.

I don't know what it is, Tyler. All these models are always over 18.

It's perfect.

It's fucking random, isn't it, dude?

It's good. Do you guys usually get young bikini models or something? No, I mean,

it just happens all the months that we see in the place tend to be over 18. I

don't know why that is.

You know? What do you think, Tyler? Any idea?

I have no idea.

But, um, okay, so, you know, this is kind of like getting a tattoo, you know,

once you model it. Like, what if we get you to a major magazine and, like, your

grandma sees it, for example? You know what I mean? Could you be able to talk

your grandma on the phone and tell her, like, I've got to go off to a bikini

shoot? Would you be comfortable with that?

Yeah, I'd be comfortable with it. Okay.

You think so, Tyler?

You're kind of innocent.

Well, uh,

okay, well, let's see this new bikini you bought. Let's see what you got.

And what's your name, by the way? I'm Bianca.

Bianca. I just told you that. You've got a bad memory.

My memory sucks, dude.

What's his name?

Tim? Tyler!

Oh my god, we're gonna have to see that bikini, aren't we?

You want me to put it on?

It's a fucking bikini modeling audition.

Where do I change at?

Um, you can just change right here. It's completely normal.

Get naked and put on a bikini right in front of you? Tyler, this is totally

normal operating procedure.

Yeah, it's standard.

Yeah, what do you think happened? Dude, when you like shoot the bikini layout,

you gotta kind of go in.

They're like, we want the American flag bikini, so you just switch into it.

They're not going to freaking go, where's my little porta potty, blah,

blah. You guys want to close your eyes or something while I'm changing?

Yeah, we'll close our eyes.

I mean, you're comfortable with that, right?

I guess so.

Nice. We'll turn around.

We'll turn around. We'll turn around.

Okay.

I'm going to tattoo her back. I don't know if it's going to fly with the major

providers. Yeah.

You won't have to do a little bit extra to get into those magazines.

You guys just closed your eyes, remember?

Oh, that's right.

We're not looking.

What are you talking about, dude?

Thong is cute, dude. I just put it on and, like, walk around for you guys.

Come on, dude, look at that ass.

Good lord.

I don't think you saw it.

But you weren't looking. Yeah, but you guys' eyes were closed.

Oh my god, is that a thong?

Yeah.

Yeah, that's pretty standard nowadays.

Nice, nice.

We like how you're kind of open to, like, getting naked and stuff.

Yeah. Oh, my God, dude.

Look at her, man. She's fucking hot.

Like, she's covering up, dude.

I can see her nipples.

You're looking at me. You're making me nervous. You're hot, girl.

Look at that, Tyler.

What do you think, dude?

You think she has what it takes?

I think so.

Well, at least we won't have any problem getting her to the naked part where she

does the topless modeling.

Yeah.

Wow.

All right, let's do some test shots of the hair, girl.

And kind of face Tyler.

What do you think, dude?

Kind of like, you know, while you're busting, you know, like you're doing a

bikini modeling shoot.

Wow.

That's fine. And you're not supposed to kiss me.

Why is your kiss cute? I mean, come on.

You don't like when guys show you affection?

No. It's like when you kiss a baby, you know? I guess I don't know.

Let's see Tyler's face so we can see. What do you think? Do you think these

boobs are real?

She said they're real.

I think so.

Wow.

What? This is completely normal.

Okay. Right? Let's see Tyler, what do you think?

Nice,

nice.

You have a nice ass.

Thank you.

I don't think she has the attitude.

She seems a little conservative.

I know.

I don't think she realizes how, like, compatible this is. No trust.

Holy shit. Wait, turn around, bro.

Look at this, Tyler. She's got a fucking topless, topless angel right here. What

is it? The fairy, not the angel. All that string, that's it.

Right there. Look at that shit.

Good lord.

Which is obviously comfortable being topless.

Ah, well, the fairy is comfortable.

I don't know about ours.

I know this is feeling model and bikini. The bikini's comfortable.

Yeah, I think she wants to be a model.

Get it.

I mean, is this part of being a model?

Standard operating procedure, ma 'am.

Damn, with a body like this, dude.

I'll tell you what, if you suck my dick, I'll put you in.

Oh, really?

You're going to suck my pee -pee.

Get it.

Are you serious?

If you'll give me the job.

Not wasting any time, dude. He's smoking.

Oh, my God.

Keep that bikini on. We've got to keep it on. Tyler's got to see that bikini.

You know, modeling in the hair.

Shit, dude.

Fucking A. Are you promised you're going to give me the job?

Yeah, we'll get you a layout or something.

All right.

Oh, my gosh, dude.

Look at it. It's almost like a stinky pole or something.

What are you laughing at?

Is this a job or not?

Just suck that dick.

I think she's going to do real well in LA, Tyler. Mm -hmm.

God, she's fucking beautiful.

She looks so innocent, Tyler. I mean, I wanted this girl to be my girlfriend.

She's fucking walking the sale on.

You're right about that bikini shit, dude. We should have pulled that.

Damn,

dude.

You've never done this before, have you?

The modeling?

I mean, you seem pretty good at it, but you seem so innocent.

I think she trusts us, Tyler.

We wouldn't lie to you, girl.

I wouldn't have you suck my dick and I'd get you a modeling job.

Spot that.

Hell, you better not open a competing agency, bitch.

I am,

girl.

You should obviously like the fucking colors. Fucking gorgeous.

You told me well, I could give you a little feature, you know a little

page or something, but There's a play out, you know Anything

you want to get the telephone cuz that pays the most anything what I had all my

high school friends come over

Well, that'll give it a job, I think.

Jesus Christ.

I'll think of something you can do.

I did a while ago. Have you ever been fucked?

Mm -hmm.

Oh, shit. You know, you're horny and all the second that they make you horny? Uh

-huh.

What if I fuck you? At least that'll kind of set you apart from the other

If I can get the job, then yeah. Yeah, we'll get you the job. I'll take off

those bikini bottoms and see what you got.

Holy shit.

Jesus Christ.

Why don't you just lie back right here?

Damn, dude, you're fucking tan.

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