All language subtitles for Forgive Me s02e09 Holy Mary.eng

Female Narrator:
Previously on 'Forgive Me':

You're drunk! You're drunk
right now so there's no point

in me trying to have
this conversation with you.

I'm not doing
this with you again.

I'm not gonna do
it, we do this every time!

Did you not get a call?

No?

Your brother's in
the ICU, he's in a coma.

Can I give
him a kidney?

Don't even
think about it.

Even if you
were healthy, no!

I love you.

[struggles
to breathe]

[sobs]

You hear me?
You are very loved.

You are a good person
and you deserve love.

I'm listening.

I unplugged him.

Yeah?

I didn't want him
to suffer anymore.

? 'Ave Maria' by
Christopher Frances Mitchell ?

? 'Ave Maria' by
Christopher Frances Mitchell ?

? 'Ave Maria' by
Christopher Frances Mitchell ?

[organ music plays softly]

Popped up
out of nowhere.

[mumbles]

Yeah. You have nothing
to feel ashamed about.

Evered.
Yeah?

Can I borrow
you for a sec?

It's fine, c'mon.

Yeah, okay. Is
there anything I can do?

Priest:
Don't sit with my family.

I'm a friend.

Not that
good a friend.

Okay, everybody here is already
talking and I'm just asking you,

please don't make my
brother's funeral about you.

All right? Just
sit back here, okay?

I'm, I'm here to
comfort your grandma.

That's fine, you can
comfort her, in private.

[sniggers]
I will.

[organ music]

[organ music]

[organ music]

Lamentations.

My soul is
deprived of peace,

I have forgotten
what happiness is.

[pew door slams]

I tell myself
my future is lost,

all that I hoped
for from the Lord.

The thought of my homeless
poverty is wormwood and gall;

Remembering it over
and over leaves my soul

downcast within me.

But, I will call this to
mind, as my reason to have hope.

The favours of the
Lord are not exhausted,

his mercies
are not spent.

They are renewed each morning,
so great is his faithfulness.

My portion is the
Lord, says my soul;

therefore will
I hope in him.

Good is the Lord to
one who waits for him,

to the soul
that seeks him.

[group sings]
? One for me, one for me, drink one for me, yeah. ?

? Raise your glass
and think on me tonight. ?

? One for me, one for me,
drink one for me, yeah. ?

? Raise your glass and
think on me tonight. ?

[door opens and closes]

How's the
view from there?

Figured it was
my only chance.

Oh, you know, you could
always be a lay reader.

No, pope or nothin',
I want to be in charge.

Look, I've got to
tell you something.

It can wait.

No, it's important.

It's a funeral.

[sighs]

I'm your father.

Well that's not
how I expected it.

It's time like this that
remind us how precious life is.

My life didn't get
any more precious today.

I'm sorry,
you're right.

I'm not stupid, I knew it
wasn't just some old lady,

with a priest for
a son taking me in.

You didn't say anything.

Why would I?

I didn't want
to upset anybody.

We didn't
want to upset you,

and other people.

Okay, so you told me.

What does it change?

[softly] I
don't know.

[sighs] Well,
thanks for telling me.

Female voice:
YOU DID IT!

[muffled arguing]

I do love you.

[trotting footsteps,
door opens and closes]

[muffled arguing]

You coulda helped him
but you just stood there!

YOU DUMPED HIM!
You let him drown.

HE WAS YOUR KID
AND YOU DUMPED HIM!

YOU LEFT HIM!

Fuck you!

LOOK AT HER! SHE'S
THE MOTHER FROM HELL!

OH, LIKE YOU
SHOULD KNOW!

Drunken slut!
That's what you--!

You took him
away from me! I loved him!

Drunken slut!
Get out! [screams]

You don't belong
in this building! You killed him!

You don't belong in here!
Go! Keep talking! Go on.

What, you finally fuckin'
proved it to me, did you?

Shut your mouth.

[sobbing] YOU! YOU LET
HIM GO TOO, YOU FUCKER!

Come with me.

Fucking fraud!

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

It's all right.

You want me to stay!

No, listen!
Listen! Listen to me!

When your brother
was in the hospital

and the doctor
went over his options,

I realized things had to change,
for me and for your grandfather.

So you're going to put
him in an institution?

Your grandfather wouldn't want
to be my 24 hour a day concern.

He would want
me to have a life.

Can you not put your own life
on hold for just a little while?

Four years he's
been laying in there,

I could have
died before him.

I know. I know.

No, you don't know!
I do, I get it!

No, no, no.
Don't bullshit me! It's sacrifice!

You are no help!

I have nuns coming
to you every week--

Because you don't
want to do it yourself!

But you
expect me to!

Look, I will help you
more, I can do it now.

[sighs] You have
your hands full.

I don't have many
years left on this planet.

You may have even less, to
be a father, to your daughter.

I can't.
Not right now.

You don't want to be a
father to your daughter,

you don't have to.

I don't judge you.

I don't judge you for
doing what you have to do

but don't you judge me.

I'm not. I'm not!

Why don't we
just make room here,

why don't we make
room in the house for me?

[heavy breath]
I'm selling the house.

I don't want it.

Where are you
going to live?

I don't want to be here
in the winter, it's too cold.

I want to go where it's
warm, I want to do things.

I need you to
reconsider this,

I need you to seriously
reconsider the timing of this.

I'm under scrutiny!
Severe scrutiny by the bishop!

Why do your problems
always become mine?

I don't care
about a bishop!

[sighs]

Look around you.

Everyone is dying.

Maybe even you.

I guess it must be hard to
outlive your grandchildren.

[sighs]

I need a rest.

Ah, you're back.

In the flesh.

What's up?

I got into a
fight with my mom,

at the goddamn wake.

You want to confess?

Didn't I just do that?

You gotta do the
whole thing, it's uh,

'Forgive me Father
for I have sinned'

and it's, uh, it's
part of the whole thing.

[sigh of frustration]

Forgive me Father,
for I have sinned.

How long has it been
since your last confession?

I don't know, was last
time, was that a confession?

So. You got into a
fight, with your mother?

I made her cry. I don't
feel very good about it.

But what happened?

I guess I wasn't as cool with
the whole thing as I thought.

I saw the old man laying in the
box and it uh, fucked with me?

Were you afraid?

Was definitely a shock.

Being faced
with mortality, it's...

it's an extremely
personal experience.

We all react
differently to it, it's okay.

There's nothing wrong
with feeling overwhelmed.

I hadn't seen the
guy in so damn long.

Thought I
hated him, y'know?

I built up this
version of him in my head.

The guy who
yelled at me.

Y'know, gave me shit?

I walked into
the funeral home,

I just couldn't
hold on to the anger.

[softly] Yo, he
looked like wax.

Y'know, covered in blush,
like a fucking schoolgirl.

Is that the first death
in your immediate family?

My grandparents and
shit but... they're old.

My father
wasn't even sixty.

Y'know, it
didn't make sense.

I lost it.

I went to a bar.

I got loaded.

Wasn't even one-thirty, but
I just had to do something.

Yeah, and your mother
was upset that you left.

No, she was
upset I came back.

[laughs]

There's this photographer
who figured out where I was,

he was outside
snapping pictures,

I was stumbling around the room
in front of all of her friends.

She said I made the
whole thing about myself.

She's grieving too.

No. No, she's right.

I could have
stopped myself.

I knew it
was fucked up,

but I just wanted her
to know how I felt. Y'know?

She started in about
how, how I was a stranger,

to my own family.

And I told her I didn't
give a shit about her.

Is that true?

'Course not.

Y'know.

I might be a little screwed
up but I'm not a total asshole.

I love her.

She's my mom.

So. All you, all you gotta
do is go and tell her that.

Nah, I can't go back.

My sisters
are pissed at me.

They'd been dealing
with the arrangements

and trying to
keep her together.

[heavy sigh]

I'm just adding
to the problems.

One of them told me if I
was gonna be such a prick,

I should have
just stayed in L.A.

You just gotta go... and
ask them for forgiveness.

Look, it's not uncommon
to be angry in times of loss,

we've been there, all of
us have been there, okay?

It's, it's a part
of the grieving process,

it's part of your
process, your sisters'.

I didn't think I'd
miss him, but I already do.

What would you
tell him if you could?

I wish we
had more years.

To get to know
each other, as men.

I wanted you
to respect me.

And?

And I'm sorry!
[hands smack together]

Let's pray.

Lord we ask for your
guidance and support

during Royce's
time of mourning.

Allow him to see the
gifts that he processes,

the depth of
his strength.

And we pray
for his family.

That they find peace
during this time of loss.

We ask that you accept
his father into the kingdom

of your mercies, so one
day they may meet again. [exhales]

In ever lasting happiness,
in the name of the Father,

and the Son and
the Holy Spirit.

[exhales deeply]

Will you come with
me to the funeral?

Be nice to have
someone there on my side.

Look, your family
is... on your side.

Yeah, but you
know what I mean.

Okay.

Okay, yeah.

Thanks.

Sorry I was such a smart ass
the other day. [clicks tongue]

I was just high.

It's... fine,
I forgive you.

Just go and talk to
your mother, all right?

Yeah. Yeah, all right.

Good.

[shakes screen between them]

[both laugh]

You have
really nice eyes.

[snickers]

See you Thursday.

[door closes]

[chuckles]

[softly groans]

[city noises]

?

?

[door opens and closes]

Mmm... [groans]

You all right?

Yeah, yeah,
thanks for coming today.

Is the uh, is
the reception over?

Mmm, most people have
gone back to my mom's.

[smacks gums]

I, uh--
[burps and clears throat]

didn't realize
there was booze downstairs.

Nope! I
smuggled mine in.

[sighs]

You want some?

No. No, thank you.

Mmm.

Talk to your
mother, or your sisters?

Said I was sorry.
I tried to, anyway.

She said she didn't
want to get into all of it.

She wanted to just...
get through this week.

Yeah, give her
some time, right?

Remember what you
said the other day?

She's your mom.

[exhales]
You love her.

You both see that.

Hopefully sooner rather
than later but don't rush her.

Let her find her own
path to forgiving you.

I want you to
confess something to me.

[laughs] That's
not how this works.

Well I told you all
that shit about myself,

y'know, how
I was feeling.

And you felt better!

Well, how is that fair?

You have the power.

You know me.

I can see it
in your face.

In your eyes.

There's something
hiding there...

I want to know.

Penance isn't
about power. Right?

It's about
unburdening yourself;

I'm, I'm not here to
hold anything against you.

How do you unburden?

Who forgives
the forgiver?

Not you.

You know, I've thought
about it, since the other day.

[sniffs]

I've never sat
down and told someone

how I was
really feeling.

Stuff I really did.

Not like that anyway.

Not without thinking that they
were gonna, uh, manipulate me

or uh, take it, take advantage
of me, or manipulate me.

I want to do
that for you.

I confess to a priest,
like everybody else.

Y'know...
everything I deal with,

everyone is
so full of shit.

Y'know, posturing.

[sniffs]

I didn't realize how
much I was like them,

until I
came back here.

People treat me
like I'm special.

Fawn over me.

Like I've earned it.

[laughs]

I've done nothing
to earn it, y'know?

The world doesn't
revolve around me.

You reminded me of that.

[sighs]

Do you have anything
to confess because I'm--?

[door opens]

[heavy, frustrated sigh]

Oh! [laughs in
surprise] Ho-oh!

Whoa, whoa,
what is this?

I thought about you.
Ugh.

I confess that.

You made me feel safe
and I never feel safe.

[chuckles nervously]

I want you to know--

[clears throat]

that I feel comfort
when I look at you.

You need to go
back on the other side.

[taps screen]
Why?

[slaps hands to lap]

[laughs] Because this
is really inappropriate.

Ohhh.
[resisting] Mm!

Mmmm.
Mm!

[lips smack]

[Priest inhales heavily
and laughs awkwardly]

You, you gotta go!

Just let me help you.

Look--
[exhales heavily]

you're confused? Right?

And you're drunk so
you just, you gotta leave.

I can see you
struggling with whatever it is

you pretend isn't
going on in your mind, okay?

[sighs]

You want to lie about it
but you can't fight it either.

Just, just
fucking let it out.

[breathes nervously]

Ah, I feel so
much better, heh, heh!

Heh! C'mon.
C'mon. Go. Go.

I know you
believe what I'm saying.

Okay, listen to me.
Mm.

Do you hear me?
Mhmm!

Either you go,
or I will. Alright?

You're not my confidante
and I am not your friend!

Do you get me?

You've misconstrued
this relationship, all right?

You can't help me.

You're too
chickenshit to ask!

Go home. Go home.

I don't want
to go home!

There's nothing
for me there!

I want to hear
you tell the truth!

Tit for tat, 'kay?

That's the deal.

[whispered] No.

No deal. Go.

FUCKING COWARD!

[sigh of relief]

[slams door
and stomps away]

[inhales deeply,
exhales nervously]

?

Narrator:
Next time on 'Forgive Me':

Am I standing in
for the perpetrator?

You're a representative
of the church.

And what are you?

I went to you because
you had the authority.

I can imagine how it
would seem that way.

Now it
doesn't anymore.

The nightmare.
It never goes away.

Ye-- it might
soon, more so.

Kills me to
see him like this.

I did this.

That sleeping dog was lying
for 30 years til I woke it up.

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