Original subtitles

Oh, well, none of us can live forever.

Remarkable man, the colonel.

A girl's earring.

Remarkable.

What a lovely sunrise.

Too bad he just missed it.

Hello.

Yes, this is Mr. Tony Ryder.

He did?

When?

I see.

I see, yeah. Thanks forcalling.

- Bad news, sweetie? - Yeah. My uncle, honey.

Look, you... You better leave, sweetheart.

- Get going. - But don't...

- But, Tony... - That's all right.

- You call me later. - But, Tony...

Goodbye.

But, Tony, I live here.

- Take a look, Mr. O'Hara. - I'm looking.

The Ryder Building. Fifty stories of glass and steel.

With a statue ofthe colonel on the top.

In solid bronze.

Holding one ofhis magazines.

Your magazines now.

- He left everything to you, me boy. - Even you.

I'll do me very best to serve you with the same devotion I did the colonel.

Tell me something. How do you follow a man like that?

It won't be easy, lad.

You know, I've got to prove to them

that I'm as good a man forthis job as my uncle was.

- Yes, sir. - That won't be easy.

- No, sir. - No, sir.

Well, you know, in five minutes

I'm going to head up my first board meeting.

- You think I'll get away with it? - Sure you will, Mr. Ryder.

That's one ofthe advantages ofbeing at the top.

Anybody who tells you you're making a mistake is making a bigger mistake.

Sure, and I feel betternow.

I still can't believe he's not going to walk through that door

and tell us what's wrong with the latest issues.

He'stelling it to that big publisher up there.

What about young Ryder? Do you think he'sthe right man to take over?

We don't have much choice.

He'sthe only relative.

Gentlemen.

- Good morning. - Good morning.

Greetings, my boy.

Welcome, welcome.

Mr. Albright, Mr. Baker, Mr. Carter, Mr. Weaver.

How do you do?

Oh, no, no, no. Excuse me. The chairman ofthe board sits here.

The colonel's chairfor you, my boy.

Thank you.

Well, now, then, I'd like to make my position absolutely clear.

My late uncle and I, we hardly...

Oh, sorry.

Hardly knew each other. In fact, we were practically strangers.

Some of you may think the only reason

I'm the new chairman ofthe board is because I'm his only relative.

Oh, not at all, not at all.

Nevertheless, it's true. Anyway, I'll do the best I can, and that's about it.

You'll do fine, Tony. Believe me, your past reputation is behind you.

From a useless life to a life of use, that'sthe way I look at it.

Nothing like responsibility to give a man backbone.

- And initiative. - And drive.

You may not be much, but you're all we've got.

Thank you, gentlemen, for your vote of confidence.

Now, what's our problem fortoday?

The colonel. He picked a critical time to die.

What about our overseas expansion program?

We've been trying to float a bank loan for $5 million. Now what?

We'll open our European branches next month, right on schedule.

What do we use for money?

Oh, I took care ofthe bank loan overthe weekend.

I called on an old skin-diving buddy of mine, Pudge Hamilton.

Hamilton? OfHamilton Trust?

His son. Anyway, the bank is willing to back us on the colonel's reputation.

That's wonderful news, Tony.

Of course, they'll have to ratify it at theirfinance meeting Wednesday.

In the meantime, I jotted down some figures on the expansion program.

Afew more here.

Didn't win a bet that day.

Oh, shot a 76. That was all right.

Mr. Ryder.

Amortization. Profit potential. See what you think ofit, fellas.

He's a very commonplace man.

He said it was important.

But I don't know any house detectives.

Did he happen to mention any particular city?

- Like London? Paris? Omaha? - No, sir.

Just that there was a young lady involved.

Oh, well, it's probably just a case of mistaken identity.

I'd better see him, straighten this out.

I didn't know he could even spell "amortization. "

Mr. Ryderwill see you now, Mr. Lasker.

Gloria?

Jeanie?

Jackie?

Mr. Ryder, I think there's something you ought to know.

Now I remember. Quebec.

Chateau Sans Souci.

Yeah, I can explain about that girl in my room that night.

She said she was a ski instructor. I didn't find out till later...

It wasn't Quebec.

Palm Beach. Mirador Hotel.

Mira...? Mirador?

Well, that's where my uncle always stays.

- Or stayed. - Oh, yes, sir.

With him being youruncle, his reputation and all,

I figured you didn't want this kind ofthing to get out.

Has she contacted you yet?

Who contacted me?

Your uncle's girlfriend.

His girl...? Look, you'd betterfill me in.

I don't know what you're... Sit down, won't you.

Sure. Sure.

You see, I was on duty early Saturday morning.

I got this complaint that there was a disturbance on the ninth floor.

I went up to investigate. When I got halfway down the corridor,

I spotted this girl running out of your uncle's bedroom.

Oh, well, I could think of a million innocent explanations forthat.

She could have been a manicurist.

- At 3 a. M? - Three a. m.

Wearing a Turkish towel?

A masseuse. You know, Turkish towel? No?

- What did you do? Did you catch her? - I tried.

But she beat me to the elevator and got away.

When I got back, your uncle's room, the place was all a shambles.

The furniture was knocked down, the lamp was broken.

He was in bed.

Dead.

He was smiling.

Smiling?

Have you told anybody else about this?

No, no, sir. No, no. Only the manager.

He thought it would be betterfor everybody if we just kept this quiet.

- Did you ever see this girl before? - No, sir.

- Did you get a good look at her? - Yeah!

That is, I'd recognize her ifl saw her again.

Say, maybe this'll help.

It's an earring I found on the floor nearthe bed.

I checked.

That inscription means "good" in Chinese.

Chinese.

Look, I'll keep this.

Do you think you could stay around fora few days?

The boss said to do anything you asked.

Youruncle was a very good customer.

Good. Well, my secretary'll get you a hotel room.

I have a hunch this girl's gonna show up,

and I want you to identify her.

Oh, it'd be a pleasure.

In the meantime, consider yourself on the payroll.

We'll just charge it offto...

- Research? - Research.

These are very interesting figures, Tony. We'd like to talk to you...

He was a remarkable man.

He was a more remarkable man than you think.

Sam, you were the colonel's oldest friend.

Thirty years' worth.

Did he have any love affairs, I mean, after my aunt died? Did he ever...?

Never. The colonel had only one love, his work.

He built his whole empire on fidelity and chastity.

Well, now, Sam, there was that lady dentist in Seattle.

Purely platonic. Anyway, we paid her off years ago.

Well, what about that female archeologist?

That tall woman with the pith helmet?

Threatened to expose him to the National Geographic?

You notice she stopped that kind ofirresponsible talk in a hurry.

Yeah. The minute we paid her off.

Boys, I've got a flash for you.

The colonel died with an undressed girl in his bedroom.

I'm not certain about her occupation,

but I have a hunch that payoffnumber three is right around the corner.

And the house dick at the Mirador said he saw a girl running

from Uncle Charlie's bedroom wearing this.

- Just an earring? - And a Turkish towel.

This means "good" in Chinese.

And 10-to-1 that the mate to this says "luck. "

It ought to. That young woman has us over a barrel.

Blackmail. I can see the headlines:

"Founder ofFamily Magazine Dies in Love Nest with a Naked Nymph. "

And a smile on his face.

The bank loan!

Lfthey hear about this, we won't be able to borrow a quarter!

- What are we going to do? - Buy her offlike the others.

Where do we find her?

I have a funny feeling she'll find us. I can draw you a picture ofher.

She's young, beautiful, sentimental, especially about money.

I can even spot her entrance.

- Where? - At the funeral.

Where's a better place to show the world

how much she's gonna miss the colonel?

So we will know Thursday.

No, that'll be too late.

The bank committee meets Wednesday.

- We'll have the funeral Tuesday. - That'stomorrow.

What about all the preparations?

We were going to give him a military ceremony.

Some four-star generals were coming up from Washington.

We wanted him to go out in style.

Sam, he went out in style.

Katie! Hi!

Hello, Marge.

Welcome back to the decompression chamber.

- Well, how was Palm Beach? - It was all right, I guess.

All right? Is that all you've gotta say? What'd you do there?

I got a tan and lost an earring.

Palm Beach, moonlight, millionaires, and all you lost was an earring?

Didn't you get to meet any ofthose millionaires?

- What made you ask that? - Just my feminine sense of greed.

- Well, did you? - Yes. I met a millionaire.

What's that? Who sitsthere?

The new researcher. Aman.

Imagine. I haven't met him yet.

Research, Robbins.

Hi. Guess who this is.

Well, I'll give you a hint. I'm tall, witty, good-looking...

...and you're simply mad about me. - Warren.

Oh, how sweet of you to call.

What'sthe matterwith yourvoice? You ought to see a doctor.

But, honey, I am a doctor. It's nothing serious.

Just something I picked up from one of my patients.

- How was Florida? - Oh, it was all right.

- But I'm glad I'm back. - So am I.

And so will Mom and Dad be.

- Oh, yourfolks are in town? - Just got in this morning.

They can't wait to meet you.

- Well, I hope they like me. - They'll love you.

Oh, well, that makes me feel better.

How about the four of us getting together, say, Wednesday night?

Oh, that's fine. Fine. I'd love to.

- I'll see you then. - Goodbye, dear.

Bye.

Now, then, old man, let's just make sure this isn't psychosomatic.

Say, 'Woof, woof. "

You know, you're sure lucky to be marrying a professional man

who owns his own business. I don't know why you even went to Florida.

Oh, I went to think it over.

Warren's a wonderful man, Marge,

but I don't know ifl, well...

- Love him? - No. Deserve him.

Every girl deserves a man, whethershe deserves him or not.

Katie, come on, come on. We're keeping them waiting.

- Who? - The brass, the brass.

You're on the bargaining committee.

Oh, no, Harry. I'm on Health and Welfare.

You've been kicked upstairs, kiddo.

Union-wise, you're in the big time.

But I've been working on pink paper towels forthe ladies' lounge.

Chicken feed, chicken feed.

Now we're gonna hit them with some real stiff demands.

We'll probably be knocking heads right through lunch hour.

Oh, but, no, I have to do some shopping during my lunch hour.

You see, I have to have a "good" to go with my "luck. "

Now, don't be upset if I do some table-pounding.

And wheneverthey make a demand,

you just shake your head and look worried.

But I am worried.

The union committee is here.

- This way, please. - Thank you.

Oh, this is Mr. Ryder. Mr. Ryder, Mr. Lane, Mr. Kowalski.

How are you?

This is Katie Robbins, the new member of our committee.

Joe Kowalski. Katie, this is Mr. Ryder.

- How do you do? - Hello.

Katie.

All right, now, let's get the ball rolling.

- Here'sthe union proposal. - Absolutely ridiculous.

This is no proposal. It is a knife at ourthroat!

Don't you think we should read it first?

Strong medicine, eh, Mr. Ryder?

Seems pretty reasonable.

It seems reasonable on the surface.

- But can management live with it? - No!

That's not an answer, it's an ultimatum.

- Take it or leave it! - It's a knife at ourthroat!

- I said that. - Gentlemen, please.

What do you think, Miss?

Robbins. Katie Robbins. I'm in Research.

Research? Oh, that's one of our more vital departments in the organization.

- Where is it? - Forty-fifth floor,

behind the water cooler. "Cooler. "

You could hardly call it that, the way it's been working lately.

I was just saying the other day in Health and Welfare, we really should...

Is that with two B's?

What, cooler?

No, Robbins.

- Yes, two B's. - B's, B's.

Miss Robbins, we've got a very important agenda here.

I'm sorry.

Severance pay. Seniority rights. Fringe benefits.

She said she was sorry.

When it comesto fringe benefits, I'd say the union's getting

all the benefits and management's left holding the fringe.

- Well put. - All we want's a fair deal.

- Ashare ofthe profits. - And a new water cooler.

Well, I mean, on a hot day, really, our morale...

Will you forget the water cooler.

Look, if you don't wanna negotiate, we're walking out.

- All right, walk. - Gentlemen, gentlemen.

This bickering is getting us no place.

Now, I suggest we adjourn to a subcommittee oftwo,

to feel each other out.

Mr. Dunning, why don't you meet Harry afterlunch.

Oh, just a minute. I have a better idea.

Now, a subcommittee oftwo is an excellent suggestion,

but any feeling-out process should logically take place between members

ofthis group who haven't displayed antagonism towards one another.

In otherwords, between Miss Robbins and myself.

Now, you don't feel antagonistic towards me, do you, Miss Robbins?

Well, no.

Good. Nor I towards you. So it seems logical that you and I should meet.

You and I meet?

- Oh, now, orafter lunch? - During lunch.

No use wasting valuable working hours.

Meeting adjourned.

Yeah, well, keep looking.

Gotcha.

I'll be back, but if I get any out-of-town calls...

Oh, I... I will be so glad to take them.

Don't take them.

Oh, don't take them. Gotcha.

Don't... Don't take them.

Gotcha.

Oh, pardon me.

What'sthis, Marge?

I don't know. It came for you a few minutes ago.

It must be that bathing suit I bought in Palm Beach.

They were having a sale at this little place...

Marge, somebody made a mistake.

Oh, my dear, I wish I did.

This isn't my coat!

"Miss Katie Robbins. "

Well, it's another Katie Robbins!

"Ryder Building, New York, New York. "

Well, it's another New York!

I guess it is my coat, isn't it.

Marge.

- Yes? - Can you keep a secret?

Oh, Katie, I'd just love to. Just give me the chance.

I wanted to be by myself on my vacation,

you know, sort ofthink things over, about Warren

and getting married and all.

Well, it's too important a step to just rush into like that.

I know that, I know that, Katie, but, now, what about the coat?

Health and Welfare found me a nice motel nearthe beach.

It was 7 dollars a day, including a continental breakfast.

Florida is a wonderful place, if you're a grapefruit.

Or half of a twosome.

Not that I didn't get offers.

But I wasn't interested in that kind oftraveler's aid.

So I tried to find things I could do alone.

That eliminated just about everything that's any fun.

During the day, I went to the beach.

I read a lot.

That is, I tried to.

But fiction sounded pretty dull

with all the juicy nonfiction going on around me.

At night, though, Palm Beach was lovely,

with that big tropical moon and those dark, velvety clouds

filled with romance and mystery.

There I was, trespassing in the garden

of an exclusive hotel, pretending to be one ofthe elite.

With all the romance around me, there I was with my partner,

a very romantic sort of fellow.

Full of air.

- Help! Help! - Suddenly I heard someone

calling for help. There was a man in the pool.

- He seemed to be drowning. - Help!

And I was wearing my flowered chiffon that cost me

two whole months without dessert.

My partnerwas useless, and I remembered my Girl Scout training.

Aperson goes down only three times.

- Help! - And this one was on his fourth.

Help!

I realized at once that poor Mr. Hackett had been drinking.

That was his name, Kirby Hackett, ofHackett Industries.

I couldn't leave him there, he was chilled to the bone.

So I decided to help him up to his room.

That was my first mistake.

My second mistake was playing Good Samaritan.

I bundled him up so he wouldn't catch pneumonia.

And then I realized I was the next likely candidate for it myself.

In my wet chiffon, I felt like a clam at low tide.

As long as he was sound asleep, I decided to get dried off.

That was my third mistake.

While I'd been playing Good Samaritan,

Mr. Hackett had been playing possum.

I said, "Mr. Hackett! Please, I'm not dressed!"

And he said, "But, sweetie, it's not as if we were strangers.

You saved my life!"

No, no, no, no, now, you stay right... Mr. Hackett!

So I said, "Goodbye, Mr. Hackett. "

I didn't know where I was going,

but anything was an improvement overwhat I'd just left.

I went through some curtains.

It was dark, but I could just tell I was in another man's bedroom.

This just seemed to be my night for it. There was a man in bed.

- And you know who it was? - Frank Sinatra.

Oh, Marge. Colonel Ryder!

- Our Colonel Ryder? - Yes.

Oh, you are sly.

That isn't even the half ofit.

Oh, I'm perfectly willing to listen to the other half.

Then it wasthe colonel who gave you the mink coat?

No, he couldn't. Don't you see...?

Lfhe didn't, who did give you the coat?

Mr. Hackett! Bright and early the next morning,

I got a phone call. It was Mr. Hackett.

Anyway, on the phone he said he was sending me a mink coat

for saving his life. And he did, and this is it. And I'm returning it.

- Why? - Because I don't deserve it.

Listen, Katie, there's no need to be so noble.

Even Dr. Schweitzer takes donations.

Oh, Marge. Back it goes.

I refuse to be obligated to a man who practically drowns himself

just to get me up to his room.

Okay, okay, now, what about Colonel Ryder?

- You were in his room... - Katie.

Oh, it's Harry.

More later.

That young Ryder's on his way down the lobby to meet you.

Now, I got some last-minute negotiating instructions for you, kiddo.

Now, you get to the pension plan before you finish yourfruit salad.

- Important. - Pension plan, fruit salad. Yes, Harry.

You might have to give him a hard sell on seniority rights,

so order something that'll take a long time, like roast duck.

Seniority rights, roast duck. Yes, Harry.

Now, here's our proposal in black and white.

- Yes. - Now, don't forget, stand pat.

Stand pat.

Thank you.

This pension plan looks very interesting.

- You match us... - Penny forpenny.

Employee and employer moving forward

shoulder and shoulder, hand in hand.

That's a very good idea.

By the way, where do you live, Miss Robbins?

- Pardon me? - Well, you know, subcommittee work,

I may have to get ahold of you in a hurry some night.

463 East 76th.

Thank you.

- May I ask you a personal question? - Certainly.

If your uncle hadn't been Colonel Ryder,

what do you think you'd be doing now?

Playing golf, I guess.

No, what I mean is, you don't seem like management to me.

You mean, would I be in the publishing business? Yes, I would.

Well, you're lucky to be able to start at the top.

I started just one step below. I worked as a messenger,

then a stock boy. Printer's devil fortwo years.

Then I worked in the promotion department, advertising, sales.

I moved into the editorial department.

I had the experience, but I had to keep proving to the Ryders.

If you're a relative, you're supposed to be an idiot.

I started at the top the hard way.

Still, it must have been nice to have Colonel Ryder behind you all the time.

I worked for a rival chain.

Well, that's enough about me. Now, you ordered roast duck.

Oh, yes, roast duck. Seniority rights...

Excuse me.

Seniority rights. There are the figures.

Oh, right here?

Yes.

Seniority rights are a basic issue, you know, Mr. Ryder.

An old man is like an old car.

Just because his carburetor gets rusty

and his spark plugs get stuck, you don't just...

Voilà.

- Isthat a roast duck? - Oui, from Normandy.

Petite, but delicious beyond words.

But it's so small.

Madame, petite mais délicieuse.

Well, I'lljust have to talk faster, that's all.

- Where was I? - Your spark plugs were stuck.

Yes.

You don't just throw an old man on the scrapheap forthat.

No, you refuel his fuel pump and you tighten up his confidence.

And then you give him another chance.

Voilà, madame.

Seniority rights, fringe benefits and pension plan.

It's all right here in black and white, Mr. Ryder.

- Now, speaking forthe union... - You are standing pat.

That's right, we're standing pat. Thank you.

Hey, it's 2:30.

What do you say we take the rest ofthe afternoon off.

I think we've earned it.

I'm curious about something.

Why did you pick on me to do the negotiating?

I suppose because you were the prettiest one there.

But you don't have to be pretty to negotiate.

No, but you're brainy too.

And the nice part about that is your brains don't show a bit.

Thank you.

But you see, I'm in Research, Mr. Ryder,

and I've been doing quite a bit of research on you.

And I'm afraid I'm not yourtype at all.

I know you like tall, svelte, sophisticated blonds.

You're a good researcher, but don't believe everything you read.

I said we earned an afternoon off, so let's take it.

Now, what would you like to do?

Well, I would like to do some shopping.

Shopping. Okay. Just what I had in mind.

Why don't you use my car.

My chauffeur, O'Hara, he'll drive you anywhere you wanna go.

And I'll drop off at the club,

take a cold shower.

- May I be of assistance? - Yes, thank you.

You see, I thought that...

I thought that this was a bathing suit that I had bought...

...on sale in Palm Beach. Just one moment.

But when I opened the box, I discovered

it wasn't the bathing suit I bought on sale in Palm Beach.

- It was Mr. Hackett's mink. - Mr. Hackett's mink.

Yes. Now, I saved his life, and Dr. Schweitzer

or no Dr. Schweitzer, I'm afraid I can't accept this coat.

Dr. Schweitzer. Excuse me, this is a matterfor our manager.

- Mr. Carruthers, please. - Yes. Yes?

There seems to be a problem with this lady's coat.

No, there's no problem. It's just that I can't accept this.

Isthere something wrong with the coat?

Oh, no, not at all. It's just beautiful.

But, you see, it's not mine. It's Mr. Hackett's. He sent it to me.

- Oh, Mr. Kirby Hackett? - Yes, that's right.

And you're Miss Robbins?

Oh, yes. Well, there's been no mistake. The coat's yours.

Oh, but there is a mistake. You see, I don't want it.

I see. You want the money.

No, sir, I do not want the money.

But the coat is yours. It's already paid for.

I haven't done anything to earn it.

Oh, I mean, all I did wastake him up to his room and put him to...

He'd been drinking, you see,

and it seemed like the only place we could...

- I saved his life! Well, I did. - Yes, yes.

Will you tell Mr. Hackett I returned the coat?

I'm afraid that might be a bit difficult.

He left for Europe this morning on the Liberté.

I don't care ifhe went to Devil's Island in a canoe.

Please, may I have a receipt forthe coat?

I'm sure this is not what Mr. Hackett had in mind.

I know what Mr. Hackett had in mind.

- How much is the coat? - Eleven thousand dollars.

- Eleven thousand dollars? - Oh, that includesthe tax.

Well.

There's $10. I would like to pay $5 a week.

Are you sure you wouldn't like to think this over?

Why, at $5 a week, it'll take you 45 yearsto pay for it.

I'm in no hurry if you're not.

You'll be through paying for it in the year 2005.

Well...

There's another 5. I'll have to try it on again.

And then I saw her buying a mink coat.

She paid cash for it.

Must have been thousand-dollar bills.

How can she afford a mink on her salary?

Overtime.

Overtime?

Overtime.

Oh, no, not Miss Robbins.

No.

Bye, ladies.

- Bye, Marie, see you at 6. - Bye.

Thank you.

- Now, what did you do about the coat? - Nothing. I have to pay it off, that's all.

- But how? - Ten dollars a week.

It's the principle ofthe thing, Marge.

I wish somebody would test my principles.

Hey, I see you found a "good" to go with your "luck. "

No, they didn't have a "good. " I had to buy another "luck. "

"Luck-luck"?

As long as you keep out of Chinese restaurants.

Pardon me.

He was a wonderful man, the colonel.

Oh, wonderful. He paid the lowest salaries in town.

Oh, Marge, that was just his business sense.

Underneath, he was a sensitive, idealistic and very lonely human being.

Are we talking about the same Colonel Ryder?

Rememberwhen we ran his biography?

When I was doing the research, I came across some ofthe poems

he had done in college.

- Poems? The colonel? - Yes.

Of course, he wouldn't let us use any ofthem. But talk about raw emotion!

Keep moving. Expressto the 30th floor.

Love is like a wild volcano Seething with dark desire

Well, if you don't mind, I'd rather remember him for his low salaries.

Hey, kiddo. I've been looking for you. Come on.

I got a cab, we're gonna be late.

- Forwhat? - The funeral. Union's got three seats.

- You're one ofthem. - Oh, Harry, I couldn't possibly.

- Why not? - Because I'm very emotional, I'll cry.

Go ahead. Afew tears won't hurt us a bit.

But, Harry, you don't understand. It's not just tears. I mean, I cry.

At weddings, at funerals. Once I even cried at a hockey match.

I don't know what it is orwhy I do it, but I'm very emotional.

Just like my wife, only she giggles.

- At funerals? - Yeah.

And I'll tell you one thing, kiddo: She better stay away from my funeral.

And in World War I, what happened?

The great man that we have gathered to honortoday

volunteered once more for military duty.

And in six months ofhard, grinding toil, he brought chaos...

He brought orderto the chaos

that beset our overseas parcel-post service.

And that Christmas, I may now reveal,

not a single dough boy in the front lines...

...not one...

...had to do without a slice ofMom's fruit cake.

Easy on the waterworks, kiddo.

I'm sorry, Harry, I can't help it.

Once I even cried at an auto show.

And then, at long last, came theArmistice.

It's gotta be her.

And ifl were to summarize Colonel Charles J. Ryder's career...

...in one apt phrase, I would say:

"First in war, first in peace and first in the publishing game. "

You go on, Harry. I wanna dry off a little bit.

That's our girl.

- You recognize her? - Even with her clothes on.

And the earring too. It's a perfect match, see?

That about wraps it up. She's our blackmailer.

No, not Miss Robbins. She's not the type.

They never are. We'll be hearing from that young lady.

I don't see why you're so upset.

If a person can't even sniffle at a funeral...

Marge, it wasn't a sniffle, it was loud.

I practically did a duet with the bugler.

Well, it is perfectly natural. Especially in your case.

There's no use arguing. I'm going straight upstairs

and apologize to Mr. Ryder.

Now, to conclude report.

Cased blackmailer's apartment.

Lives alone, except for small bird.

Think it was parakeet. Might've been canary.

Couldn't make out through binoculars.

You mean you were spying on her?

Orders from the board, sir.

- Our orders, Tony. - That's right.

Blackmailer came home about 7:12 p. m.

Made dinner. Ate dinner.

Washed hair. Washed dishes. Went to bed.

No visitors?

No visitors, no phone calls.

Well, that's about the size ofit. Better get down to work.

Will you please leave by the side door.

I still can't believe she did it.

- Oh, no. - Mr. Ryder.

The bank is postponing the meeting about our loan until tomorrow.

Gentlemen, I'd say Miss Robbins had us over a barrel.

We're lucky ifwe don't end up in one.

Now, let's be fair. Are we sure this isthe girl we're looking for?

- Of course we are. - Lasker identified her, didn't he?

People have been hanged on cases of mistaken identity.

- Mr. Ryder... - And I say that a person is innocent

until proven guilty. How do we know she's guilty?

- Those earrings. - Could be a coincidence.

They probably sell thousands ofthese. Ten thousand!

And here's something else. If she really wasthe blackmailer,

where would she be now? In my office waiting to see me.

- Mr. Ryder. - Yes?

Miss Robbins is in your office waiting to see you.

In my office, waiting to see me.

She said it was important.

To see me...

Careful, Tony. This is sticky business.

- And she's plenty tricky. - Sticky, tricky.

Good morning, Mr...

Good morning, Mr...

Good morning. I think I know why you're here, Miss Robbins.

- Sit down, please. - Thank you.

- Sit down. - Yes.

I wanted to come up and get it overwith before I lost my nerve.

Thank you. I know what you must think of me, Mr. Ryder.

But honestly, I couldn't help what happened.

- It was all my uncle's fault. - No, it wasn't anybody's fault.

Oh, believe me, I didn't wanna go.

But afterall, he wasthe head ofthe company.

- And you were dazzled, huh? - Dazzled?

Orshall we say, impressed?

Well, that is a betterword, I guess.

But, you see, the real trouble, Mr. Ryder, sir,

isthat I'm...

I'm too sentimental.

Sentimental. Oh, I'm sure you could think of a betterword.

Well, how about emotional? That's what I am.

That's it, I'm over-emotional.

Especially when I think about all those wonderful poems Colonel Ryderwrote.

- Po...? He wrote poems? - Oh, yes.

Oh, they were so sensitive and passionate.

Passionate poems?

Love is a wild volcano Seething with dark desire

And you and I, the twain... That means 'the two. "

I get the idea.

Miss Robbins, how many poems are there?

- Dozens. - Dozens?

Yes. You know, your uncle was a very warm and tender man, Mr. Ryder.

Oh, you should read his letters.

- Letters too? - Yes, would you like to see them?

No, thanks, and I wouldn't want anyone else to see them, either.

Oh, well, you mustn't worry about that. I have them in a safe place.

I'm sure you do.

Mr. Ryder. Suppose we published all ofthose letters and poems

so that the entire world could see what kind of a man your uncle really was.

Well, it was just a suggestion.

Miss Robbins, I've had enough ofthis cat-and-mouse game.

Well, it was just a suggestion.

We both know why you came up here, right?

Now that we know where we both stand...

Yes. Well, I'll get back to work.

- No, we'll talk. - Talk?

What'll we talk about, fringe benefits?

- We'll talk about loyalty. - All right.

My uncle's reputation and the Ryder Enterprises are very closely linked.

If anything should happen to destroy this company,

hundreds ofpeople would be thrown out of work.

Now, you wouldn't want that to happen, would you?

- Why, no. - Good.

Then your loyalty will be suitably rewarded.

I didn't come here to ask for any...

- In the form of a raise? - I don't want...

Shall we say $50 a week more?

- Fifty dollars? - A hundred dollars?

I think you're a little unstrung by the funeral. If you...

Two hundred dollars a week. Take it or leave it.

- Oh, I'll take it, I'll take it! - Good, good.

Now, remember, don't talk about thisto anyone.

Don't worry, I won't.

But I think you should. Talk.

To a doctor!

Well, why don't you look it up yourself.

How do you like that? Some wise guy trying to tell me

we had a president named Andrew Johnson.

I realize that you're new in Research, Mr. Lasker,

but ifthere are any more phone calls, especially about presidents...

...I'll be glad to take them. - Oh, gotcha.

Excuse me.

Thank you.

Oh, by the way...

...do you and Mrs. Lasker bowl?

I do. She doesn't.

There is no Mrs. Lasker.

Oh, that is peachy.

That you bowl, I mean.

I love bowling.

It's so healthy.

And maybe some night you could join Katie and me

- and her boyfriend some night. - Oh, sure. Any time.

Tonight?

Marge. The strangest thing just happened.

- Hello. - Miss Robbins, this is Mr. Lasker.

- Mr. Lasker, this is Miss Robbins. - How do you do?

And guess where we're all going tonight. Bowling.

Oh, Marge, I'm sorry, I can't tonight.

I have a date with Warren.

This fella, Warren, does he work here?

No. Dr. Kingsley's a friend of mine.

He's herfiancé. They're going to be married.

Oh, marriage is a wonderful institution.

When'sthe happy event?

Oh, we haven't even set the date yet.

When'sthe happy event?

Oh, we haven't even set the date yet.

Dr. Kingsley's folks are in town. Katie's afraid they won't like her.

I'm not afraid, exactly. But they're from a small town.

You know, sort of strait-laced.

Small town, strait-laced. Rememberthat.

I hope I make a good impression when I meet them tonight, that's all.

Why shouldn't you?

Because it'll probably be days before I can pull myselftogether

afterthat ten minutes Ijust spent with that nut upstairs.

- Which nut upstairs? - Tony Ryder, that's which nut.

Then somebody called Research and Miss Robbins got too busy to talk.

I wonderwhy she called Tony, excuse me, Tony, a nut.

I don't care what she called me orwhy.

We haven't learned a single thing from that electronic house dick.

We have a lead that could be very good forus, Mr. Ryder.

We found out that this babe is engaged to a very respectable guy.

- So? - So get her married off and bingo,

she's off your back and out of your cash register.

Sure. "Miss Robbins, how would you like your husband to know

about that little episode at Palm Beach?" I guessthat'll hush herup.

Counter-blackmail is an ugly word, gentlemen.

Suppose we're on the wrong track. Suppose this Dr. What's-his-name...

- Kingsley. - Suppose he'sthe brains

behind this blackmail scheme and Miss Robbins is nothing but a pawn.

- That's hardly likely. - Likely or not,

I intend to do a little investigating of my own.

I wanna meet this guy, size him up and see what we have to contend with.

- Yes, sir? - Would you get me the address

- of a Dr. Warren Kingsley. - Yes, sir.

Thank you. Meeting adjourned.

Amateurs.

Well, there you are.

Have you any idea how you're going to get in the place?

Simple. He's a doctor, I can have a stomachache.

Careful, or you'll end up with your appendix missing.

Very funny, Mr. O'Hara. Now, you wait for me down the street there.

Now, cheer up, Bobo.

The nice doctorsays it's all in your mind. Yes.

Come on, Bobo.

Hey, son, do you mind ifl borrow your dog for a few minutes?

I'll give you a quarter. What do you say?

Gee, thanks. But, mister, it's not my dog.

You mean it's not your horse.

Emergency case. I'd like to see the doctorright away.

And what isthe nature ofthe emergency?

Well, it's rather personal.

I'd preferto see the doctor. Oh, doc!

Young man, you're finally out ofthe woods.

You just stick to that vitamin therapy

and you'll feel like a new dog.

Thank you, doctor.

- Yes, do you have an appointment? - Emergency case, very important.

Come on, doc. Oh, doc.

Now, you take it easy, old boy. Good old doc'll fix you up. Attaboy.

Did you have an appointment, Mr?

Heminschlogger. Julius T. Heminschlogger.

Yeah, and as I mentioned, this is an emergency case.

I see. What seemsto be his problem, Mr. Heminschlogger?

Well...

...amnesia.

- Your dog has amnesia? - It happened all of a sudden.

I wastaking him fora walk,

and he gave me that 'who are you?" look.

- The 'who are you?" look? - Yeah, like this:

Don't mind telling you it shook me up.

Canine amnesia. That's very rare. I don't think they everwrote that up.

Well, now's your chance, doc.

Not only to help me, but advance the cause of medical...

Will you hold still, Julius. What are you...?

Not in the pocket, Julius. You see there, doc?

He thinks he's a pickpocket.

Julius? Isn't that your name?

Is it? Yeah, it is. Well, this is Julius Jr.

I'm the sentimental type and we're very close, you know.

See, doc? Now he thinks I'm Lassie.

Kind of a memory block, huh?

- May I? - Yeah.

All right, now, Julius, just calm down. You're among friends now.

Just relax. Just relax.

Tell me, Mr. Heminschlogger, has he had a physical lately?

Well, not in six months. You better check him over. Take yourtime.

- Lfthis doesn't work, we'll try analysis. - Oh, anything.

Long as we get my buddy back on his feet.

"Kansas Institute of Veterinary Science. "

That must be a wonderful old school.

Sure is. My father's the president.

Oh, he is?

Now, let'stake a look at those tonsils. Now, now, Julius.

Biting won't solve anything.

Just relax.

Oh, doc. This picture, I've seen this girl before.

- Where? - Well, isn't she a chorus girl

at the Copacabana?

No, I'm afraid not. That's my fiancée.

Oh, well, I could be mistaken.

No, my family's very strait-laced.

I'm afraid they would never allow me to be engaged

to a girl from the Copacabana.

Rocky! Rocky!

All right, where is he?!

What do you want? This is a respectable clinic.

I'm looking fora dognapper, that's what I'm looking for.

- What's in there? - You can't go in there.

- Police! - Who snatched my dog?

- Get out ofthere. - Police!

- Rocky, baby. - Keep your hands offmy patient.

- Police! - You dognapper.

I want words with you.

I don't know what you did to my dog,

but I want everything put back the way it was.

- Police! - Thanks forthe advice

about my parakeet, doc. I'll keep him out of drafts.

In there, officer. You'd better hurry.

Oh, doctor. Dr. Kingsley.

- Hello. - Well, here we are.

Won't you come in. How do you do?

How are you?

Happy to know you, Miss... What wasthe lady's name?

- Miss Robbins. - Miss Robbins.

Happy to know you. Come right in.

Well, thank you.

I'm delighted to know you.

Miss Robbins, this is Mother.

Oh, I'm delighted to know your mothertoo.

Oh, I mean...

She's my mother, Katie.

I know, Warren, I know. I meant to say that...

Did you hearthat, Mother?

Girl here thought you were Warren's grandma.

No, I didn't. Honest, I didn't. You're too old.

I mean, you're both too old.

Oh, what I mean is...

I'll explain it later. Could we sit down?

Yes, of course, sit down. Could I take yourwrap?

No, thank you.

- Your hat? - Yes, put it anywhere.

Well, isn't she everything I said she was?

I'm sorry I don't have any more room.

No, no, it's very nice.

In Kansas, we have 30 acres.

Well, I could use some ofthose here.

That's very funny.

Well, I would say that refreshments are in order.

What have you got in mind?

Well, I made a nice big pitcher of cold mar...

Hot chocolate.

Of cold hot chocolate. Yes. That's right.

So you have your choice

of cold hot chocolate or hot hot chocolate.

Hot, please.

Well, I'll have cold, I guess.

That'stwo chocolates.

One hot and one cold, coming right up.

Isn't she nice?

I forgot.

I'm all out of chocolate.

Oh, would you like olives? Would you like an olive?

No, thanks.

No, thank you. They stick in my... No, thank you.

Yes.

Well, I guess we're off to our little French restaurant.

Oh, little French restaurants, that's all we've had on thistrip.

It seems to me we ought to go to some big noisy nightclub.

Do you know any nightclubs, Miss Robbins?

There's the Martinique.

But I've never been there. Never.

I've heard about it. Let's go there.

Dad, it's very popular. I doubt if we'd get in.

You just tell them that your dad heads up

the Kansas Institute of Veterinary Science.

That'll make them sit up and bark. Yeah, sit up and b...

Did you hearthat, Mother, "sit up and bark"?

- She said she's never been there. - No.

I'm a working girl. And working girls just don't have time for nightclubs.

That's right.

Yeah, well, should I get your coat, Katie?

Thank you, Warren.

I don't need...

- Mink? - May I?

May I have a feel ofthat?

Oh, my. Tourmaline mink. They run into money.

What is it you do for a living?

Research.

Obviously pays very well.

Katie, where did you get the coat?

I bought it on time, Warren. I wastrying to explain.

Ten dollars a week. I wanted to surprise you.

Yeah. You surprised me.

Shall we go?

Oh, do you know that I...?

Oh, I beg yourpardon.

- What's the matter, darling? - Nothing.

I just have a little business to take care of.

Could we have a table forfour, please?

I'd be very happy to accept a small bribe tomorrow night.

Next week would be even better.

- Oh, but we... - Tonight is quite impossible.

Oh, it is?

George, do me a favor, huh?

You see that girl there, with the fur coat? That's Miss Robbins.

Now, she's got to get married.

Yeah, and they love each other. Now, we've gotta play Cupid.

See, we'll get her a good table, some good music and real fine wine.

Then let nature take its course, you understand?

Perfectly.

Let's go to the Stork Club. Motherand I have neverbeen there.

Well, I'm more than glad to be leaving. This isn't my kind of place.

You're so right, Mrs. Kingsley. It's not my kind of, either.

Miss Robbins. One moment, please.

- Me? - Athousand pardons.

I'm sorry I didn't recognize you.

Me?

Captain, table 30 for Miss Robbins and herparty.

Us?

But I've never been here before.

Katie probably looks like one oftheir regular customers.

Whose name just happens to be Robbins?

Champagne.

Oh, we didn't order any champagne.

For Miss Robbins. Compliments ofthe Martinique.

Oh, well, I know.

I'm probably the one millionth person to come in here tonight.

- Tonight? - Well, I mean, since it opened,

or something. You know, how they're always giving things away?

No. No, I don't.

Well, they do. All the time.

Just last week there wasthis girl, and she was crossing this bridge

in this car, and they gave it to her.

- The bridge? - No, the car.

Anew one too, that is.

She was probably the ten millionth person to cross the bridge.

Orwas it a tunnel?

Yeah, well, Mom, ifKatie says she's never been here before,

- she's never been here before. - No, I haven't.

And it was a tunnel. And this girl...

To the Veterinary Institute in Kansas.

I'll drink to that.

Everything satisfactory, Mr. Ryder?

Yeah, I think we've given Cupid a good start.

Now, you keep those arrows coming.

I heard them say they were going to the Stork Club from here.

Good.

Come on, honey, let's go to the Stork Club.

We can't keep ourfriends waiting.

We don't have any friends at the Stork Club.

- We'll make some. - I liked it here.

Oh, darling, I forgot my purse.

Oh, I'll get it for you. I'll meet you out in front.

Heminschlogger! It's Heminschlogger.

I'll drink to that.

No, Dad, it'sthat crackpot I told you about.

- Where? - Sneaking out.

He waved at me.

I believe he was waving at me.

Don't be silly, honey. How would you know Heminschlogger?

Heminschlogger? That's not Heminschlogger.

- That's my boss, Tony Ryder. - Oh, no. No, you're mistaken.

How could I be mistaken about a man that just this morning

gave me a $200-a-week raise?

- Two hundred? - Aweek?

I'll drink to that.

But I didn't take it.

And I've never been to this place before,

and I'm so sorry we came here again.

Warren, couldn't we go someplace else for dinner and have supper?

It's just making me very, very nervous.

Yeah, I'm a little nervous myself.

Waiter. Check.

Never a check for Miss Robbins.

I'll drink to that.

Me too. One forthe road.

Hail to thee, O Kansas Institute

Of Veterinary Science.

With your students scattered wide

- I wonder if we could get in here. - Really, Warren.

She only had two drinks, Mom.

It's just that she never had champagne before.

I wonder.

They're always ready

With needle and insecticide

We'll go quietly, officer.

Perhaps some othernight, sir. Or better yet, some afternoon.

- But thank you, sir. - Oh, no.

We're not tourists, old man, you know.

I should say not.

I happen to be the president ofthe Kansas Institute of Veterinary Science.

- That's right. - He is. He's the president.

No luck, huh? All right.

Are they always this snooty?

I don't know, I've never been here before.

Either.

That's the party I told you about.

Oh, yes, sir.

Come on, honey, let's get out ofhere.

It's getting awfully stuffy. Let's go back to La Martinique.

Miss Robbins. Please forgive the captain.

He's a new man. It's nice to see you again, Miss Robbins.

It's nice to see you... It's nice to see you again.

- How're the wife and kids? - Just fine. This way.

She's never been here, either.

Thank you very much.

- She's a great girl. - Congratulations are in orderfor me.

I'm the ten millionth lady to cross this bridge.

Hail to thee, O Kansas Institute...

Ryder, Tony Ryder.

Yeah, I'm sure he'll talk to me.

They're trying to reach Pudge.

Good. Try and find out what's holding up that loan.

Now, about getting ourblackmailer married off, I think that...

Not a chance, Mr. Dunning. Not for a long time, anyway.

How do you know?

Talked to the waiter at the Stork Club.

He told me Mrs. Kingsley and her son were very unhappy

about Miss Robbins doing the cha-cha in the kitchen...

...with the cook.

Oh, it'll be a cornless day in Kansas before that girl gets married.

Let's face it, gentlemen. Cupid-wise, we are in trouble.

Our counter-blackmail scheme doesn't have a prayer.

We've got to get that young lady out ofthe way.

I know a gangster.

Well, he's not really a gangster. He's my wife's brother...

Hello. Hello. Oh, hi, Pudge.

What'sthe good word on our loan?

Oh, I see.

Well, could you tell me what kind of a hitch?

I understand, Pudge. Thanks.

Well, they've decided to hold off on the loan.

Gentlemen, I guess I'm not the best man forthis job after all.

Now, this is no time to give up, Tony.

Didn't yourfriend Pudge give you any reasons?

Well, he said they were checking on a rumor.

- Didn't know what it was. - Arumor?

We have got to keep her from talking, orwe're sunk.

What ifwe tried this little thing again?

Let the little lady incriminate herself.

We've already tried that. She wouldn't talk.

With me we tried, and with me she wouldn't talk.

But what if we got somebody else wired for sound?

Somebody suave, clever, good-looking, huh?

Somebody she could really go for.

I've got a cute little spot in the Village.

Ridiculous.

Looks like you're drafted, Tony.

I'd like to help you...

- Mr. Ryder. - For personal reasons, I'd rather not.

Listen to this.

"Dear Mr. Ryder, I've been thinking about the $200-a-week raise

you offered me. Of course, I can't possibly accept it.

Naturally, I realize you must have been joking. "

- Joking? - Go on, go on.

Oh, here's where she slips in the knife.

"I suppose next you'll be offering me the Ryder Building,

lock, stock and magazines. Ha! Ha!"

"Ha! Ha!"?

See for yourself.

It's "ha-ha," all right.

Well, this girl is going to "ha-ha" us right into the poorhouse.

Not if we move fast.

'Yourstruly, Katie Robbins. "

Well, Tony?

How do you wearthis thing?

Good boy! Good boy!

Now the question is: Where should he go into action?

I think Mr. Ryder ought to take her someplace

where she thinks they'll be alone. Just the two ofthem.

Then she'll really open up.

I think I know just the spot where I can catch Miss Robbins

with her "ha-ha" down. My apartment, tonight.

And a little champagne to loosen hertongue, eh, Mr. Ryder, huh?

Yeah, and ifthat don't work, I can alwaystry torture.

That's very funny. Torture.

I'm not in a funny mood, Mr. Lasker.

As far as Katie is... Miss Robbins is concerned,

I may be involved in this underhanded scheme,

but I certainly don't have to enjoy it.

Oh, yes, sir. Yes, sir, I see what you mean.

Good luck.

I'll get it, Kim.

Now, look, after you've served dinnerto the young lady and myself,

you get lost.

Same like always. Get lost.

No, no, this is business.

Same like always. Monkey business.

- I hope I'm not late. - Oh, no, not at all.

Come on in.

Thank you.

I realize I shouldn't have worn mink to a business meeting,

but it's my very first one.

I'm sure it won't be your last. "Ha! Ha!"

- Pardon me? - "Ha! Ha!"

Oh, yes. "Ha! Ha!"

Oh, my.

This is a lovely room.

Oh, are there just the two ofus again?

Surprised?

Oh, well, no. No, it's just that you...

When you called me about the urgent company business,

well, I had this bowling date, and I thought...

Well, I don't know what I thought. Health and Welfare, maybe.

Your health and yourwelfare, Miss Robbins?

No, everybody's health and welfare.

"Ha! Ha!"

"Ha! Ha!"?

"Ha! Ha!"

Oh, this is beautiful.

It's a Remington.

Yes, he painted this around 1.900.

Oh, I forgot. You're in Research.

No, my father used to collect Remington sketches.

Of course, he could never afford the original oils.

Isn't this beautiful?

Shall we? Nothing like a little champagne to loosen yourton...

Whet your appetite.

Champagne?

Well, I'm not very thirsty, Mr. Ryder.

Matter of fact, I'm not very hungry, either.

So why don't we just get our business overwith, and I'll run along.

Oh, what'sthe rush?

Well, I'm not in a rush, but I thought maybe you were.

Oh, no, I'm not in a rush, Miss Robbins. Here.

Drink up.

Oh, your uncle certainly was a strong man, wasn't he?

Yeah. Strong like a bull and weak like a man.

You remind me ofhim. You have the same strength.

You see? The jaw.

I mean, it's similar.

Oh, your power's going.

Oh, I really can't stay. I have this bowling date,

and I'm sort ofthe anchorman... Girl.

Relax, Miss Robbins. On a beautiful evening like this,

it's no crime to enjoy the view and sip champagne

before we settle down to more important matters. "Ha! Ha!"

All right.

Here'sto crime! How'sthat fora "ha-ha"?

- "Ha! Ha!" - "Ha! Ha!"

But, Warren, I was in the office when he called, and he said it was business.

When a man like Tony Ryder asks a girl like Katie up to his apartment,

you know what kind ofbusiness.

Step on it, driver.

But I asked Mr. Lasker to go bowling.

Why can't we bowl without Katie, and mind our own business?

Because Katie is my business.

But just an hour ago, you said you were through with her.

Well, that was an hour ago.

Suppose we get there and there's nothing going on.

There better be.

Oh, what a beautiful view this is.

There'sthe Triborough Bridge

and the Brooklyn Bridge and the Queensborough Bridge.

And the Brooklyn Bridge again.

Again?

Oh, that's their problem.

Here we are.

I really shouldn't. Like I said before, I'm the anchorman.

But...

Now, then,

let'stalk business.

Oh, good. I could listen to you talk business all night.

I'll lay my cards on the table, Miss Robbins.

Katie.

I'm Katie, and you're Mr. Ryder.

Cards? What cards?

I thought you wanted to talk business.

Let's face facts, huh? No beating around the bush.

Bush? What bush?

You haven't answered me yet about the cards.

And I could listen to you play cards all night.

Let's get to the point, Miss Robbins.

Katie.

All right, I know when I'm licked.

Now, it's your move.

You name the figure, and I'll make out the check.

I could listen to you make out checks all night.

- Please, Miss Robbins. - Please. Katie.

All right. Katie.

What do you want?

I want...

I wanna dance.

And even though I'm the anchorman, I think that you had better lead.

Of course.

Oh, me.

Ajug ofwine, a loaf ofbread

And thou beside me Singing in the wilderness

You know, that's one ofthe prettiest poems your uncle everwrote.

Orwas it youruncle? No, that was Khayyam.

Omar Khayyam.

Born 1.157, died 1.906.

Oh, orwas that the Chicago Fire? I don't know.

As long as I'm not on duty.

You know, ifit weren't for my uncle,

we could have met under more pleasant circumstances.

Oh, I think this is very pleasant. Circumstantially, that is.

Love is a wild volcano Seething with...

You may kiss me, Mr. Ryder, if you'd like to.

It's perfectly all right.

Oh, Heminschlogger, you're slipping.

Katie.

Oh, Mr. Ryder. Mr. Ryder.

First time I ever kissed an anchorman.

Oh, excuse me.

I'm sorry, it'sthe champagne.

Oh, I really shouldn't have done that.

You see, I'm sort of engaged.

At least, I was until last night.

I think I'd better go.

You know, I don't think you've seen the rest of my Remingtons.

Oh, but I saw the one in the living room. I saw that one.

I have a few more that I'd like you to see.

Here's one ofhis most famous paintings, Pursuing the Indians.

Well, I can sympathize with them.

Oh, there are more this way.

Here's my favorite one.

His famous card game.

Yes, I have seen this reproduced so many times, it's like an old friend.

Did you know he did a few bronze statues?

Yes, he's just as famous for his bronze as he is for his paintings.

And there's anotherbeauty overthere.

But I can barely see it.

I know.

Most men have etchings, and you have Remingtons.

Yeah, but most men aren't as lucky as I am.

Especially right now.

Mr. Ryder, you know what you should do?

You should turn this into a theater.

Atheater in the round.

Your lighting effects are most effective.

Most.

You have this system in all yourrooms?

Every room except the kitchen and in there.

You wouldn't really need it in the kitchen and in there.

No, you wouldn't.

I really must be going, Mr. Ryder.

We came here to have a meeting.

We're having one, Katie.

Yes, but I feel very embarrassed.

I only came here to talk.

Of course you did.

Katie, let's forget the past. What's done is done.

The important thing is I love you.

I didn't wanna fall in love with you, but there it is.

Mr. Ryder.

Tony. I forgive you.

You're so sweet.

Forgive me forwhat?

For everything, darling. Florida.

- Florida? - And the hotel.

- The hotel? - The rendezvous with my uncle.

The rendezvous with your uncle?

I forgive you forthe whole ugly scheme.

You think I had a rendezvous with your uncle?

Forget that. You met my uncle.

He was old and lonely. You felt sorry forhim.

You're a very emotional girl, right?

Right! There's only one small detail you've missed.

I didn't happen to meet your uncle, I planned it that way.

- You planned it? - Beautifully.

You mean you heard he was lonely...

I heard he was loaded. And after Cosmo...

- Cosmo? - That beatnik bongo player

I used to be engaged to.

He was great on the bongos, but very low on the dough, like all the others.

- There were a lot of others? - You wanna count baseball players?

If you do, then there were quite a few others.

I was crazy about baseball players.

I used to like jockeystoo, only I kept growing and they didn't.

That's in the past. I don't wanna hear it.

Now, prizefighters are the worst

because you have to catch them when they're not in training.

Well, I forgive you. We're all a little weak. And I'm a little weak.

Well, I'm not. I'm strong.

Now, back to that rendezvous. Why did I do it?

- Blackmail? - Blackmail?!

Yeah, but I forgive you. That's all in the past.

Well, thanks a lot!

And one more thing, Mr. Ryder,

once a blackmailer, always a blackmailer!

- Katie! - I want money. Real money.

By the time I get through with you, you'll be selling your magazines...

Let go! On a street corner!

Katie, you can't leave me now.

No!

- Katie. - Let go or I'll punch you in the nose!

Good evening.

Good evening, Mr. Ryder, Miss Robbins.

I hope we're not interrupting anything.

- Well. - And they say bowling

isthe most popular indoorsport.

I was helping herwith her coat.

Well, was she crawling into it?

Warren, don't just stand there. The man insulted me.

Hit him! Sock him! Knock him down!

- Well, he is down. - Well, then, kick him!

Oh, well... Let me help you.

He's up now, Warren, give him the old one-two.

Oh, well, I would, but I have to operate in the morning, my hands.

Mr. Ryder, you'll have to excuse Katie because she's not used to champagne.

And you know who plied me with it? Your precious Mr. Heminschlogger.

And you know what else? He called me a blackmailer.

- Ablackmailer? - Yes.

Look, he's even stolen my other shoe.

Yeah, well, I think an explanation is in order, old man.

Oh, I agree with you, young man.

Do you think I'm a blackmailer, Warren?

I never heard of anything so ridiculous in my life.

Oh, I can always depend on you.

- Take me out ofhere. - Oh, Katie...

As for you, my fine-feathered Heminschlogger,

you're very lucky my fiancé didn't beat you within an inch of yourlife.

I know, I'm not lucky, but...

Come, darling, let's go.

Katie. Katie!

Research. I mean, hello.

Marge, you bettertake it.

- Katie, please. - Mr. Ryder.

- Are you in for Mr. Dunning? - Take the message.

- Katie! - Mr. Ryder, he says it's urgent.

He hasto talk with you.

Hello. Look, I'm very busy.

We've got the loan.

Yeah. You know what held it up?

The bank thought we hired Lasker to watch you.

I was beginning to think so myself.

Katie, please!

Katie, you've got to listen to me.

- Pardon me. - Katie.

Please, you've got to listen to me.

Nothing you can say interests me. I'm going to marry the man I love.

Not him, him.

I can't let you make that terrible mistake.

- See this? - It's a gun!

No, not a gun, madam. It's a tape recorder.

Before you think ofmarrying this young lady,

I'd like you to hear something, doc.

- You didn't! - I didn't, huh?

You may kiss me if you want to, Mr. Ryder. It's perfectly all right.

First time I ever kissed an anchorman.

Oh, Mr. Ryder.

Alittle further.

And one more thing, Mr. Ryder.

Once a blackmailer, always a blackmailer!

Blackmailer?

Oh, come in, ladies, you're just in time to hearthe next chapter.

I can explain everything, Warren. Really, I can. I can explain it all.

I want money, real money!

When I'm through with you, you'll be selling your magazines...

- Let me go! - Very interesting, huh, doc?

On a street corner!

Well, that's about the size ofit.

Sorry.

This could never have happened in Boston.

Katie.

I think I'll... I better get on home.

It's a little late for bowling,

and I've got a basset hound tonsillectomy in the morning.

Warren. You don't believe all that silly nonsense, do you?

Oh, no. No, of course not.

Well...

Well, what about tomorrow evening?

Oh, well...

Oh, I've got a meeting at the dog medical center.

But I'll... I'll keep in touch with you. Okay?

It was bound to happen.

I knew it as soon as I met his mother.

There, there, Katie.

I'm sorry, but I had to show him up forwhat he was.

We'll just have to find you somebody else.

I don't want somebody else.

And you, embarrassing me like that in front ofthose sweet old ladies.

They thought I was some kind of a criminal.

I'll admit I shouldn't have done it.

But even an idiot deserves a second chance.

I know you're not a blackmailer.

I never believed you were.

I couldn't fall in love with a blackmailer.

That's the important thing.

Oh, no, the important thing... Where are you taking me?

- Up. - But I don't wanna go up.

I neverwanna see him again, and I neverwanna see you again, either.

But first I'm gonna tell you what really happened that night in Florida.

I was running away from some drunken lunatic I had rescued

from the swimming pool and had helped up to his room.

I came through some curtains, and it was dark.

And I knocked over some furniture.

There I was, in another man's bedroom.

And there was a man in bed.

Your uncle, Colonel Ryder.

I thought he was asleep.

Well, I was in and out ofthere in about five seconds flat.

And that must have been where I lost my earring.

I started down the hall, looking for a stairway

ora freight elevatoror something,

when, suddenly, the house detective yelled at me.

- Hey! - Oh, I kept right on running.

I hadn't done anything, but racing around a hotel with practically

nothing on can give a girl a terrible guilt complex.

Like I told you, that's all in the past. I never believed it for a minute.

Stop that.

I told you, we're through.

- Of course, we're through. - Well? So goodbye.

Goodbye.

I neverwanna see you again.

But you'll have to, darling. We'll be on our honeymoon.

You mean you're...

...asking me...

Oh, Mr. Ryder.

Oh, Mr. Ryder.